Kelly Bensimon finds a one-piece swimsuit: so much better, or still unflattering?


Yesterday, we had new photos of Kelly Bensimon in yet another skimpy bikini in Miami. This has become Kelly’s thing – she vacations in Miami, poses for the paparazzi on the beach, and generally grosses everyone out with her truly odd body. When I wrote about Kelly yesterday though, I noted that she was looking a little bit better. She’d gained some weight, her stomach didn’t look so… Iggy Pop-esque. She looked healthier. But still, many of you asked why Kelly felt the need to strut her stuff in a bikini when her body seemed made for a one-piece. Well, here you go. These are photos from an event for Spiegel in Miami last night. This is how Kelly walked the red carpet – in this one-piece!


She really does look so much better, doesn’t she? Even though the one-piece isn’t really flattering (look at her bikini line), it’s much, much, MUCH better than a bikini.


Photos courtesy of WENN.

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90 Responses to “Kelly Bensimon finds a one-piece swimsuit: so much better, or still unflattering?”

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  1. Lisa says:

    Ummm…who is this and why is her crotch hanging out like that?

  2. I luv HGF says:

    It would look fantastic, if her lady bits were not hanging out!

  3. brin says:

    Wow….so much better…keep reading these posts, Kelly!

  4. Jackson says:

    It looks like some lady parts are try to run away from her crotch. WTF?

  5. Yasmine says:

    WTF? I’m being accosted by her vagina in every damn picture. Tuck them in lady, geeez!

  6. fabgrrl says:

    Well…uh, now we all know she gets a close shave.

  7. Susan says:

    DO. NOT. WANT.

  8. Marie says:

    Holy crap!! Is that her vajay jay lip?? Eeewwwww.

  9. bcksunshine says:

    gross man! on the left there, you can see her nasty saggy camel wad.

  10. lrm says:

    i’m going to puke….first thing on a monday morning. so. gross.

  11. Marie says:

    lmfao @ “saggy camel wad”

  12. Cirque28 says:

    It’s a definite improvement, although you still wonder if there isn’t a stylist out there who could help.

    But I think the way Kelly taped the man-junk up in order to wear that is truly impressive. Only kidding! He sure has a pretty face.

  13. Riley says:

    Disgusting! I hope I don’t get fired from work for pulling up this picture. Kaiser, you should warn us readers that photos contain images of hairless kittays…

  14. Waldemar says:

    This is hilarious. Did really no one stopped her before going out of the door to point out whatever the hell is going on down there.

    Even a cameltoe would have looked better.

    But I agree, a one-piece looks way better on her.

  15. manda says:

    who is this woman and why do we care about her bathing suit?

  16. Jacq says:

    People still wear Spiegel?

  17. Quest says:

    Why did we have to go there…oh gawd…the pics are an improvement to the top half of Kelly but lawd… have mercy on my eyes. Keep your junk in …it is looking like she has a penis down there.

  18. arock says:

    dear kelly,
    we all admire your self confidence to be photographed in a bathing suit no matter reason or season. frankly you look pretty good all things considered. however, the camel toe is something we need to talk about. its no longer just reserved for the animal or an exotic dish in morocco. if you have any questions, please look it up. urban dictionary is a great jumping off point.

    p.s.- your junx is hanging out.

  19. Alexandra says:

    Who is this woman? And why is she on a red carpet in a bathing suit and flip flops?
    It’s like one of those scrolldown fug pics on Go Fug Yourself – it’s quite nice in the top half of the picture, and then you realise it’s not a nice top and cardigan, it’s a f’ing bathing suit . For a red carpet event. Insane.

  20. Rita says:

    She looks much better in the one piece and Kaiser need not bring the bikini line to our attention, especially in parenthesis like (whisper, wonk-eye elbow in ribs….”she got a side-kick to her cooter”).

  21. Nanea says:

    What’s her drug of choice?

    No person I know would go out of the house looking like that, and I know lots of people with better bodies.

    Those cheapskate flip-flops make everything even worse, and that’s after having had to look at KB’s crotch area.

  22. Eileen says:

    She’d better tuck that in or she’s going to trip.

  23. Justaposter says:

    I could have gone all my life, without seeing the crotch shots. Thankyouverymuch!

  24. SHump says:

    She’d look tons better if half her kebab wasn’t hanging out. Who wears a bathing suit on a red carpet, anyway?

  25. junk573r says:

    Some of these comments are hilarious. Especially “She’d better tuck that in or she’s going to trip”. Too f’n funny. Seriously though, how can’t she feel that? It’s totally a vedge and she has to be doing this on purpose. There is no way a woman can have her lips hanging in the breeze and be oblivious to it. Put your snatch away. It’s ruining my breakfast.

  26. lili says:

    oh, pls, so now we pick on women for their lady bits? how backwards is that? it`s just some skin.

  27. guesty says:


  28. Roma says:

    Way too early in the morning for drive-by vadging.

  29. abbizmal says:

    She needs to tuck her puss in. Nasty.

  30. Riley says:

    @Eileen: So funny…

  31. everlyo says:

    muuuuch better but the wrinkled vadge hanging out ruins it :( hate when that happens lol!

  32. albeli says:

    Torso less scary.

    Crotch much scarier.

  33. Amanda says:

    MUCH better. I don’t like the particular suit she wore, but I cannot believe how much better it makes her look.

  34. EdithP says:

    It would have been better if it would have been a size larger.

  35. Kbomb says:

    If she see’s these pictures she’s going straight to her doctor for vag-botox. Or vag-restalyn shots. That is some saggy cooch.

  36. latam says:

    much better, bit of the side droop though… least she looks after her bikini line

  37. Jules says:

    She needs to improve her tuck game!

  38. annie says:

    no comment

  39. Pearl says:

    She totally looks like a he-she…and I could do with out the issue in the crotch area. Ewwwwe.

  40. Bailey says:

    the title should include NSFW.

  41. sandy says:

    y’all are crazy, but really, tuck that in, I’m going to puke.

  42. jdao says:

    Much better!

  43. gobo says:

    Jesus. Something with a wider crotch please.

  44. lola lola3 says:

    Woman, put some clothes on.

  45. cindy says:

    I see lip, yuck

  46. Jb says:

    Am I the only one who thinks she did something to her face? She looks so different!

  47. flotus says:

    It is oh so apparent that Kelly has had a “tummy tuck” (see bikini pics), and I think she looks much better in the one piece! Just wished she would have gotten all her bits in order, before flashing her smile for the cameras.

  48. Rachael says:

    The bigger issue is wearing white Havianas with that entirely black ensemble on a red carpet. Black sandals with a touch of gold would have been more appropriate. Hello.

  49. anonymoose says:

    Didn’t see the bikini pix…but this is def unflattering. She needs a SKIRT with this.

  50. the original bellaluna says:

    @ Rita – (whisper, wonk-eye elbow in ribs….”she got a side-kick to her cooter”). OMG, girl, I laughed so hard I choked! Funniest phrase I’ve heard in a long long while!

    I laughed so hard at these comments, I’ve got tears running down my face. Kudos, All, well done!

    @ Rachael – ITA with you on the white flip-flops; they stick out like a sore thumb, and were the first thing I noticed. Of course, with the side-vadge leak going on, I guess the white flip-flops aren’t exactly the only sign of her lack of class.

  51. Jennifer says:

    I’m sitting at work and laughed out loud at many of the comments. I really can’t add anything that’s not already been said; but thank you for all of laughs. It was much needed on this “I’m missing that hour of sleep” day.

  52. TeeTee says:

    nope, I can’t..

  53. Eden says:

    There’s something SO funny about her posing and preening for pictures while completely oblivious that her cooch is hanging out.
    I wonder if she’s dying of embarrassment today or whether she’s loving the extra attention…

  54. Debra says:

    No to the bikini.
    No to the one piece with high cut.
    Say yes to the dress..please.

  55. ordinarygirl86 says:

    OMG you should have warned me that I would be seeing Kelly’s sagging cooter hanging out of her bathing suit…..(shudders)

  56. CBsTheSh*t says:

    Can I just say everyone is really on point today. Your posts…I’ve never laughed so hard, so long

    arock I salute you

  57. CBsTheSh*t says:

    Jb (#46),

    I totally agree. I think she had something done, and now she’s doing all the photo ops to show it off?

    What do you think Kaiser?

  58. womanfromthenorth says:

    OH MG … her junk!

  59. Kim says:

    OMG! She needs to pull that puppy over her privates!!

  60. Deven says:

    She definitely looks better in a one-piece, however, she looks like she forgot to put her diaper on!!

  61. Newbie says:

    It’s a vast improvement…if only it wasn’t riding up her crotch. Someone needs to look her over before she steps on the red carpet.

  62. Marie says:

    OMG I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time thank you ladies.

  63. edvard says:

    that’s what happens when your penis weighs down your one-piece.

  64. Kiska says:

    It would be fine if we didn’t have to see her labia.

    Try again, Kelly.

  65. Quercus says:


  66. Johanna says:

    I wish I had a chance to see this post earlier when I was having a rough morning. These comments would have really made my day. I can barely finish writing this comment because my body is shaking of the laughter!

  67. Cinderella says:

    Look on the bright side…at least we didn’t see a string.

  68. hatekyle says:

    She needs a crotch tuck ASAP. That extra leather hanging out can make a dozen B-Ewww-rkin coin purses.

  69. Francesca says:

    Ah yes, the signs of motherhood and aging all happening together, so beautifully…she’s got balls for wearing that spanks bathing suit!

  70. Renee says:

    Good lord, that chick can’t get anything right.

  71. CB Rawks says:

    *Shudder* Mud flaps.

  72. memememe says:

    The swimsuit looks great on her. It really elongates her torso, and it takes 10 years off her at least.

    I’m having trouble finding anything to complain about. Ya know, xcept for the teeny tiny problem that her VA-JAY-JAY is all KINDS of hanging out!!! I mean, how the hell do you NOT notice that?!?! Damn, if my panties even start *sneaking* in that direction it makes me crazy. How on earth can any woman NOT realize half her hoo-ha has escaped the corral!?

  73. Jayna says:

    She doesn’t care. She’s so crazy, she’s just glad you’re posting her photos and talking about her. LOL

  74. Messenger Of Truth says:

    Lisa Rinna called. She’d like the surgically removed parts of her upper lip back.

  75. sandy says:

    please, put that away already,.. some people will do anything for attention.

  76. My2Cents says:

    Aww. Someone should of told her. That’s so cruel. She must be totally humiliated. Gawd, I would be.

  77. Paige says:

    ha ha ha GROSS!

  78. Majosha says:

    *crosses self*

  79. Hakura says:

    These are some of the funniest comments I’ve seen in a while. xD ‘saggy camel wad had me giggling for 10 minutes.

    This woman… I just don’t know. On anyone else, I’d say it was a complete accident they’re probably ‘face-palming’ about now, but with this woman… It could’ve been entirely intentional.

    Personally, I’d rather see the horror that is her in a bikini… than being flashed lips not on her face.

  80. Emily says:

    My eyes are burning now. I just couldn’t look away from her crotch! I think I’ve just been turned temporarily straight, at least until I get that image out of my mind.

  81. filthycute says:

    Dude, tuck your pussy!

  82. Magsy says:

    I don’t know what’s worse, the frog legs, the fugly fuckin’ ruffly one piece, the white flip flops or the puckered out pussy. Phew, all wrong honey, all wrong.

  83. DiaBLa says:

    this is just so wrong…this “woman” is seriously deranged to walk a red carpet with the daughter’s swim suit on… time cover that thing up!!!
    oh and those horrible shoes….shudder…

  84. jeppe says:

    jeesus how ugly knees

  85. susan says:

    Are you serious?! Want is the matter with her!
    Can she not feel that she is hanging out down there?!

    Maybe her Ex-husband can offer some advise on these matters.

  86. Mel says:

    Could you imagine if she didn’t get a wax? Her skin has so much sun damage that it penetrated to her brain and she doesn’t know any better.

  87. ab says:

    almost rocks the front prolapse look

    but not quite

    but much less iggy pop than the bikini

    …ugly knees??
    (hard to tell too much getting in the way)

    and to think that she’s so much more attractive on the outside than the inside (as we’ll soon be able to see if i’m right about the prolapse)

  88. Lyytikainen says:

    Nothing that normal guy haven’t seen before…Big deal, she’s beautiful and she has a great body.

  89. willworkforfood says:

    This website is my new guilty pleasure. I took a break from submitting my resume everywhere, and read all these comments. Laughed so hard and so long I started clicking on everythingl. I made myself go rake the front yard just so I wouldnt feel guilty. Back now…I will throw out a few more resumes later…promise…lol.

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