Kate Middleton’s nine-year Waity status got the whitewash treatment


So much news about Prince William and Kate Middleton! Unfortunately, the news is not all that exciting, so I’m just going to recap some stories going around, and then I’ll get to the good stuff (my rant about Lifetime’s Will & Kate movie, which was dreadful). Here are some highlights:

*Kate Middleton’s family has now given themselves a family crest. I find the idea of a family like the Middletons – nouveau riche! – getting a family crest to be rather pushy and silly in the grand scheme of things, but they’ve got one, and now the Middleton crest will be joined with William’s crest once they are married. CB likes the Middleton crest – she thinks it’s pretty and feminine. I think the upside-down acorns are fruity. Needs more lions.


*Will and Kate asked people to donate to charity in lieu of actual wedding presents, and the charities have already racked up six-figures in donations.

*George Michael recorded a cover of Stevie Wonder’s “You and I” for Will and Kate. Michael says: “I want Will and Kate to know that this is a genuine gift, not a promo exercise. It’s a gift that they’ll be able to turn into many, many donations.” But he’s not going to the wedding: “They should [be] surrounded by people they love…not dodgy ex-con pop stars.”

*As for the night before the wedding, sources are claiming that William is going to spend the evening with his father or with his brother, or perhaps both. According to the British tabloids, Will is spending the night at St. James’s Palace with his dad because “Prince Charles is a loving father who’s a lot closer to his sons than people often realize. He’s made it clear his priority in the hours before the wedding is his son.”

* But what about Harry? According to Us Weekly’s sources, “William asked Harry to spend the night at Clarence House, the night before the wedding… It’ll be great for the two brothers to be together before the big day. I’m sure Harry can help William with any last-minute nerves.”

*Kate Middleton went shopping for her “honeymoon gear”. Ladies, whatever happened to the word “trousseau”? It’s so much fancier.

Okay now for my rant – you don’t have to read this if you didn’t watch Lifetime’s Will & Kate. IT WAS TERRIBLE. It was so bad, it wasn’t even cheesy-good. They made so many huge errors in the actual timeline, and they just wholly manufactured a great deal. Their version of Waity Katie was all plucky, moody and uppity, while the version of Will was dashing and romantic. Does anyone believe that? I hated that they got the first photographed kiss (in Switzerland) wrong. I hate that they showed the 2007 breakup, and then two minutes late he was proposing! Um, there was like three years of WAITING in there. I also hated that Waity’s job at Jigsaw – which she actually did for only a handful of months in 2006 – was somehow spread out over the course of the show like Waity was just WORKING and WORKING all the time. She wasn’t. She just spent NINE YEARS WAITING for her prince to call her. I hated that the “other women” were so misrepresented – William dated/slept with many women while he was with Kate, during the course of those nine years.

I just felt like they got the basic personalities of Kate and William so, so wrong. Kate is docile, like a geisha. She doesn’t storm out of cars in the middle of a fight. She doesn’t talk smack to an upper-crust girl. She doesn’t confirm or deny the state of her underwear. And William is in reality a wishy-washy bastard, like his father. They portrayed him as commanding and forward, and he just isn’t. UGH.



Photos courtesy of WENN.

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63 Responses to “Kate Middleton’s nine-year Waity status got the whitewash treatment”

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  1. Rita says:

    The acorns in the crest had to be upside down or they would have looked like a poorly groomed peen….a tiny peen.

  2. Tanya says:

    True, the William & Kate movie sucked on toast, but didn’t you have a blast screaming at the TV over the big load of BS propaganda that it was? I kinda did, so that in and of itself was rewarding for me. Or at least cathartic. Hey, I had a stressful week, lol.

  3. lucy2 says:

    That movie sounds awful! Just as I expected. They’re trying to sell a fairytale.

  4. Jackson says:

    Those acorns look like tiny erect penises with one hairy ball. Oh, wait, maybe they’re British Acorns? Royal Acorns??

  5. jessica says:

    I can sleep at night now… I will really be able to sleep once the wedding takes place.. keeps me up all night! lol

  6. Lynnie says:

    The “Kate Hate” is old and tired. Give it a rest.

  7. PrettyTarheel says:

    Oh Kaiser, can we please just once get caught up in the romance? For just a minute? Because frankly, I came to work with no makeup, I’m trying to train my replacement for maternity leave, which is traumatic for me because I can’t let go of anything, and I need a “Calgon, take me away” moment where Wills is determined and Kate has a pair. Or Wills has a pair and Kate is determined. Whatever.

  8. Mia says:

    Thanks for taking one for the Celebitchy team because there was no one in hell I was sitting through that Lifetime movie. I loved Diana, so it’s a bit surprising to me that I could care less about this wedding. I was over this relationship long ago. I hope they are happy, but something tells me William could have a harem of mistresses and Kate would take it. Because she took it for 9 freaking years.

    I admire Chelsea Davy so much more than Kate because she does not give a f*ck about being a princess. She screws Harry whenever he comes a calling and goes back to her life when they fall out.

    I’m so ready for this wedding to be over and done with so I can get back to enjoying the shenanigans of movie stars and D-list wannabes.

  9. sapphire says:

    Why the hate on this one? Sure, they’re boring and lack star quality. But they’re pretty normal considering the usual run of Royals.

  10. LadyBert62 says:

    well I think the Middleton family crest is silly but when you marry into royalty I guess you have to have one in order to create a new blended one!

    I like Kate and hope she is happy when married – I dont especially like william but I hope that he is true to her and doesnt give her the diana heartbreak even though she has the diana engagement ring! All the best to both of them.

  11. honey love says:

    i am sick and tired of news outlets forcing us to consume this sham of a union. waity katy is sad and i would not want to copy her actions in any relationship. can we all say — desperate!!! once this thing is over i will be so happy.

    jerry seinfield was right –“these people are no one”

  12. Amy says:

    Was that Kate Hate? I didn’t detect any Kate Hate. Just a little prince loathing.

  13. Eze says:

    I’m really disappointed in Williams lack of style. No pocket square, sleeves on the jacket should be a 1/2″ shorter. Put a shine on those balmorals Prince William, I’m sure they’re bespoke! Trouser length and inseam look good, maybe a 1/4 less and put a 2″ cuff on those baby. He dresses like a beta, he should take a cue from his old man who is quite stylish.

  14. Ell says:

    ‘A wishy washy bastard’ seriously? William does his job well and with warmth, not sure where the ‘wishy washy’ bit comes in.

    As for all the ‘waity’ nonsense. The two of them aren’t even 30 yet. They’ve been living together for years. They seem to have taken the path of many modern couples. I don’t think it would have been advisable to marry young, doubt palace want another divorce on their hands. And Kate has been working for the family business in recent years due to being hounded by the paps.

    Sigh…I’m not even a royalist but I find the hate for them difficult to comprehend, especially for William, considering he didn’t ask to be born in to such a regimented, public existence.

  15. latam says:

    Whats wrong with ‘wishy washy’ I hate commanding and forward. I’ve always thought william to be a nice guy, why is he a bastard?

  16. Gabrielle says:

    The movie was so enjoyable for me because it was so stupid. They especially made Charles look so much less douchey than he really seems. What about the scene where William confronts Charles about never loving his mother? Classic!

  17. Deb R says:

    but can we give a moment’s love to george michael?? “They should [be] surrounded by people they love…not dodgy ex-con pop stars.”

    that made me giggle and love him even more. yes, he’s got no impulse control – and his little willie likes men’s rooms too much – but i love that he seems to see who and what he is.

    i think i’m gonna play “faith” and shake my booty just for him.

  18. groovyspecs says:

    I read in the Daily Mail that Kate was required to have a crest, since she was marrying into royalty. Normally in these cases the bride is a noble herself and already has a crest. Lady Di had a crest and William has incorporated parts of that into his own.

    It was expected that Kate would apply for one, but her dad was quite clever and did the application instead. That way the whole family can use it (and of course their business too).

  19. MeriJaan says:

    I hate those navy “British Airways” pumps!

  20. bluhare says:

    I for one did not watch the movie. I watched the T Mobile Royal Wedding ad.

  21. Actually, fact is we know nothing about this relationship or these two people. Just as strangers know nothing about our own relationships and us. It’s all speculation and inference. As far as I’m concerned, if I’ve got to manufacture a backstory, I’d rather err on the side of fairy tale and enjoy the spectacle.

  22. BeckyR says:

    William and his chosen bride both appear to be attractive, reasonably intelligent and ready to get married and begin life together. Really together. With all the bad news in the world, this is one spot of “lovely”. Let’s all enjoy it and wish them well.

  23. DeE says:

    Nice shout out and very perceptive of both you and him. Yeah…..Faith…he would love being remembered and honored with a coupla shakes and hair tossing. Don’t have the song, though, but i’m there in spirit!

  24. TG says:

    I am finding the conniving Middleton or should it be the Middling family more interesting than Waity now. They really do seem to have planned this whole thing from way back when. I just don’t admire a guy who strings a woman along like that and I definitely don’t admire a woman who puts up with that. Can you imagine hearing her chanting over and over “I will be Princess one day”.

  25. melinda says:

    I saw a drinking game on Yahoo that might make the movie more fun and worth watching, but it premiered on a Monday unfortunately so I couldn’t partake.

    I’ll totally give some love to George Michael for that statement.

  26. hellen says:

    Oh George Michael, I love you for that statement, you dodgy ex-con pop star you.

    And “geisha” is really the perfect term for Kate – she knew what she needed to do to claw her way to the throne. Good job hon. Now ditch your trashtacular family and you’re good to go.

  27. Ja says:

    God, she’s so flexible, accommodating, so meek that it borders on desperate. The press is all kissing her ass for how stylish and fashionable she is. Well, if what she wears is fashion forward, then what is Michelle Obama in that famous Alexander McQueen dress? Or Zara in her stilettos? Oh well, I suppose at least I’ll have a valid reason to why I have 35 pairs of shoes. I’ll bloody need them when Waity Katie’s granny style soles flood the shops!

  28. Darlene says:

    I love her. I wish people would stop giving her a hard time.

  29. fabchick says:

    I thought the movie was cute. Cheesy but cute. I really wasn’t interested in them as a couple before the engagement but now I can’t wait for the wedding just to see her dress.

  30. Rita says:


    LOL, I’ll rub your feet for that.

  31. jello says:

    Oh come on. Let’s just pretend for a moment they’re two kids who love each other and all is swell. It’s pouring rain today and the world has enough serious problems.

  32. Lisa says:

    George Michael’s quote about how Kate & William shouldn’t be surrounded by dodgy ex-con pop stars is freaking AWEsome and hilarious. Love George Michael!!

  33. Jeri says:

    Of course it was made-up, it was Lifetime. Do you think Kate & William are confiding in the press? Most of what is in the press is made up except official announcements and even those are “tweaked” by the palace at the very least.

    I think we can believe the wedding date, the fruit cake, the wedding party and that’s about it.

  34. harfang says:

    What jello said. Furthermore I’m in Minneapolis and it is freaking snowing, beyotches.

    She has the Best Hair Ever. It makes me simultaneously covetous and fetishy.

  35. Rachel says:

    Where does one go to get a crest made? I’d like one. And I’d wear it every day.

  36. Dena says:

    She’s desperate and pathetic as a modern women. She is also tenacious, scheming, self-disciplined and focused. She would have had a brilliant corporate career. But, then again, she landed the best job in England. Didn’t she? As a woman, I can’t respect her. However, I do admire that she won the top prize. Of course, I don’t know him but he’d bore me to tears. He seems so uninteresting.

    Her being unconditionaaly available to him made her look like a courtesan at best and desperate at worse. But, of course, we weren’t the audience she was playing to and she played it well. She is his “fun-loving always available mummy.” she knows her place. She won’t upstage him like Diana upstaged Prince Charles. She offers a close-knit family. Something he doesn’t have. She makes him feel smart, connected, important and funny. She gives him what he doesn’t have and something he thinks he needs. Great strategy and tactics. All hail the reign of Queen Catherine.

  37. Lauren says:

    I hope this isn’t another Royal Disaster. Charles, Anne & Andrew have all had divorces. I hope Kate is treated well, although William seems to think this is some sort of logical business arrangement. Kate is already outshining William at public engagements, just like Diana outshone Charles. Thus, Charles grew to resent Diana. Then, cheating ensued early in the marriage. I still wonder if Prince Harry is Charles biological son.

  38. Crash2GO2 says:

    Geeze Kaiser, project much? How could you possibly know what Katie and William are like in real life? For sure, we get a white washed version of them in the press, and they never let their hair down for the paps to see. She might be quite the fiery wench for all we know.

  39. Caz says:

    I’m torn on this union. On the “I believe in love” side I wish the couple have a wonderful happy solid life together. On the “cynical” side it’s so obvious Kate and her family targeted William to get first prize. As many women in his life would have also tried? Has he compromised and chosen Kate because she’s there right now…getting hitched so early? The Diana comparisons are inevitable. Will she be an icon as Diana was? Maybe maybe not. As the future Queen she’ll have to be darn impressive.

  40. Lushus L. says:

    Team Waity! I waited 10 years for my guy and I couldn’t love him more. 🙂

  41. bremar says:

    Wow! What a bunch of haters!

    You all seem like jealous high school girls!!

  42. Hanh says:

    maybe we don’t know their personalities, but their actions speak louder than words. kate spent years just waiting (not working or even doing charity work) for her prince to finish dicking around and marry her. Those are not role models I would choose for my daughter or son. I wouldn’t be surprised if William came back to Kate only because the other women wouldn’t put up with his BS.

  43. Charlotte says:

    Enough Already America. Our attitude towards anything British borders on ignorance of their traditions which are romantic and timeless. I stayed up to watch Diana’ wedding and I appreciated and was blown away with the “over-the-top” pageantry. No wonder all the classic fairytales originated in Europe. I was devistated when Diana was killed and stayed up until 4 am to watch her funeral. I greatly admired her, plus she was the same age as I was and also the mother of two young children. While Prince Charlas seems like a douche, both of their sons seem to take after their mother. Why shouldn’t we appreciate that William and Kate waited a while to tie the knot? And last but not least, It sucks living your life in a fishbowl! I am the wife of a politician and its hard to have everyone (strangers) gossip and watch your every move and judge you without knowing you.There is too much destructive and ugly things going on in our world, it’s comforting to see something happy happening.

  44. insidescoop says:

    in the recent weeks I’ve come to a minor revelation that Kate is whole lot tougher than we tend to give her credit for. In addition to putting up with 9 yrs of sporadic infidelity [i don’t care who you are the king of, 9 years of it gets to you] she has only recently seemed to truly adopt the “demure” fiancee look. Before the proposal Kate was alway a bit edgier and sexier about the way she dressed. She is now covering up a bit more and letting out her waist and knee hems but all in all she still retains a bit of edge. I think she wisely understands that a princess and future queen needs to put on a certain act and persona, which i don’t doubt she can command, but i wouldn’t be surprised if she is a whole lot more interesting than we tend to give her credit for….

  45. Hmmm says:

    All hail, @Dena#36. Totally agree! Well said!

  46. eternalcanadian says:

    I laughed when I saw the Middleton coat of arms because the acorns looked like penises. I know the acorns are supposed to represent the three children and the trees that were on the grounds of their childhood home, but seriously they could have done so much better and less phallic. 😛

    Why do people say Catherine “waited” nine years for William to smarten up and propose? Catherine was 28 when William proposed. This would have put her at 19 when she and William first started dating and that isn’t correct. It was more like six years as they didn’t start dating seriously until she was 22.

    And I do think she has the guts to tell William off. William indeed is wishy-washy and he needs a strong woman to put him in his place. Although now that Catherine has that ring on her finger I think she will let up and William will be back to his playboy cheating days. I mean look at the classy way he asked four of his ex-lovers to his own wedding! I think all of them are still single, especially Jecca Craig. There’s no way I would have let my fiance invite his ex-lovers to our wedding so that tells me Catherine is letting up on William’s hanky-panky ways.

    That’s too bad as she really did come across as a very steady-minded person but the cracks are now showing. Bleh. 😐

  47. Sumodo1 says:

    I did the whole Diana thing and can’t go there again. I got married that year, too, and had this emotional bond with a woman I never met. She died, I cried. I went to an exhibition of her dresses and wept. To go through this with Waity Katy–nope.

  48. Lee says:

    With all of the crappy stuff going on in the world, isn’t just wonderful to see two kids really in love? My best to them!!!!!

  49. Freya says:

    How silly of people to accuse Kate’s mother of organizing this whole thing.
    She can do anything, it’s William who decided. He has had other girlfriends, and picked Kate to marry. That’s it!

    We’re going to enjoy watching the wedding on TV. It will be a nice and colorful show, complete with a salute/flyover by the airforce.

    Best wishes to Wills and Kate.

  50. Freya says:

    eternalcanadian (#46)

    There’s another way of looking at it.

    They’re both secure in their feelings, and neither minds their exes at their wedding. I think it was nice that they invited them, and I think they will attend.

  51. RHONYC says:

    she’s starting to look really thin in the face. hopefully, she does’nt develop a ‘problem’ like his mom did from all the stress. 🙁

  52. Reality says:

    I think you must remember that none of us know Kate at all, and are just judging her on a superficial level and based on nothing but speculation in the tabloids.

    No offense, but is Angelina waity? How about Goldie Hawn? They’re not even 30 yet, and waiting was probably a mutual decision. I don’t think anyone is buying this docile geisha thing you seem to see, all you have to do it listen to her in an interview to know she’s confident and poised, and probably wears the trousers in their relationship.

    “William dated/slept with many women while he was with Kate, during the course of those nine years” Did he really? I don’t remember all these women. Were they at least ‘on a break’?

    Jesus, you’re sucking the romance right out of this story….

  53. Sam says:

    george michael is awesome.

    as for the crest, she’s marrying a royal. this doesn’t seem odd or like they are trying to gain ground in regards to class. it seems like it would have more to do with royal tradition then anything else.

  54. latam2012 says:

    Yeh i O dont get all this “waity” crap. They were on and off, d you really think shes was just sitting on her arse waiting for a ring?

    What a load of rubbish.

  55. Plus ça change says:

    Is anyone else loving the contrast between the rigid locked-up jacket and the crazy wild windblown hair in pic 3? Oh please let that be a metaphor for a subversive streak within the strictures of the modern royal family. (The spirit of Diana in Kate.)

  56. Tess says:

    The future Queen of England’s family can get a crest if they want one… I just can’t believe they chose that one.

    Those acorns have nipples.

  57. Freya says:

    “…he’d bore me to tears.” (#36)

    You’re lucky then, because he’s marrying Kate, not you!

  58. Freya says:

    “i dont get all this “waity” crap.”

    I don’t either!
    In their engagement interview, William said that they’ve “been talking about it for a long time.”

  59. JulieM says:

    Once and for all, I don’t hate Waity No Longer Katie. I just completely and totally disrespect her. You can rewrite history all you want, but she did not work since university graduation and clung on to William like a leech. Yes, she was sitting on her arse waiting for a ring. And, in my opinion, William is very much like his father, spoiled and self entitled. And a little dim, I’m afraid. How ever much many of you want to believe in fairy tales, this is not one. Just ask Diana. I, too, got up at 2AM to watch her wedding back in the 80’s. Cried like a baby when she died.

    Actually, one really has to admire Kate’s tenacity; she hung on and got the prize. Let’s see how happy it makes her.

  60. Disbelieving says:

    I want a crest. Can we all get crests? Mine would have more lions cause that one is meh. Just like these two. Meh.

    I just get the “they so deserve each other” vibe and not necessarily in a good way more in a he is settling and she didn’t have enough energy to even dream of another vision for her future; you know one that she would control. So not romantic. *sigh*

  61. Masque says:

    I would totally invite George Michael to my wedding.

  62. STOPGOOP says:

    I don’t understand why this is all about Katie waitey – how sexist is that? Why do you assume it was her waiting on him? It isn’t possible two people had a rational discussion about marriage and decided to wait until they actually knew each other intimately and as best friends before jumping into a public lifelong commitment? I applaud them for acting mature and doing what felt right for their partnership, rather than caving to external pressure to marry before they wanted to.

  63. Celien says:

    Actually, #60 I read that it IS easier to get crest than people realize but I wonder if that only applies to Brits??