Our long national nightmare is over. Lindsay Lohan finally found her Dick. Literally. After rejecting all of our splendid casting suggestions (Wilmer, Charlie Sheen), and rejecting all of the Lifetime-approved casting suggestions, Lindsay Lohan has finally found an actor she thinks is capable of playing Richard Burton to her cracked-out Elizabeth Taylor. So, who is this outstanding, quality, A-list actor? Clive Owen? Sir Ian McKellen? Not so much. Lindsay’s Dick is just some Aussie dude.
After an extensive search, Grant Bowler (True Blood) has been set to star opposite Lindsay Lohan in Lifetime‘s biopic Liz & Dick, playing Hollywood great Richard Burton. The biopic chronicles the enduring love of movie icons Taylor (Lohan) and Burton (Bowler), whose fiery romance was the most notorious, publicized and celebrated love affair of its day.
The casting comes only 10 days before Liz & Dick is scheduled to begin filming — on June 4 — after the movie’s executive producer Larry A. Thompson and Lifetime had auditioned “many actors on just about any continent,” Thompson said. He noted that the hope was to try and find an actor who, like Burton, is Welsh, but New Zealander Bowler wowed them with his tape.
“Grant will add gravitas to our couple and bring to life one of the greatest actors who has ever lived,” Thompson said. “Burton was a Welsh poet, a rascal, and a man’s man, who swept Elizabeth Taylor off her feet and flew her so close to the sun that they both exploded into stardust that still lights up Hollywood.”
Grant’s casting was sealed today after he did a reading with Lohan at the network.
“The chemistry erupted in the room,” said Thompson said, calling Taylor and Burton “the first Hollywood royal couple, the first Brangelina.”
This poor man. Did anyone else feel a wave of sympathy for poor Grant Bowler? I wonder if he’ll even be able to get any work after Liz & Dick airs. Of course, that’s presuming so, so much. Even though production is supposed to start within two weeks, I have my doubts as to A) whether Lindsay will actually be focused and sober enough to begin production, B) whether she’ll be able to work throughout the production, considering she’ll probably be “celebrating” her return to Hollywood with nightly crack-fests and C) whether poor Grant Bowler will run away from this production screaming once he realizes that he has to “seduce” THE CRACKEN.
Here’s poor Grant Bowler. If he ends up “dating” Lindsay Lohan… well, then maybe I’ll stop pitying him.
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN.
WILL NEVER get tired of you using the phrase “Lindsay’s Dick”. Please continue.
And Lindsay has been flashing us her cooter freely for quite some time now.
This time around her Cooter is getting paid.
Such fun how the jokes are practically writing themselves.
Did you know Grant Bowler played COOTER in True Blood??
You know, the werewolf jackass dating crazy Debbie that gets killed off while they were both trying to drain hottie Bill to death?
That’s Cooter!!! Lindsay’s new Dick!!
Boy, he likes playing along crazy women doesn’t he? Except the actress who plays Debbie is one decent lady in real life!
I didn’t realize who he was until the last picture and even then it was still kind of hard to place him. I knew he was a were, just couldn’t figure out which one..
Yes! I knew he looked familiar!!
He also was just on the last 2 episodes of the first season of ABC’s ‘GCB’, the new silly, quirky, funny guilty pleasure.
I realized that with his last pic – OMG, it’s the ‘over-horny stud breeder named Mason I need taken off my hands!’ in Cricket’s words.
Oh, he was perfect in that role – absolutely yummy, with clear animal magnetism and warmth and undeniable sexappeal that makes women week in their knees.
I think he will be awesome as ‘Dick’. To bad that this movie will most likely kill his career, if simply working with Ho’han and her STDs does not kill him first.
Yup, when I heard the news I thought, he’s going from playing a Cooter to playing a Dick.
LOL! It’s a step down in my opinion 😉 Takes less brain-cells!
Good remembering! He looked familiar, and when I read that he was in True Blood the fog only cleared a little bit. Thanks for clearing this up!
Thank you Ladies. I just remember him in that shed kicking Bill on the floor while Debbie sucking on his arm screamed: “Hey! I’m eating here!”.
Someone else reminded me further down of Debbie’s “THEY KILLED MY COOTER!”
Classic vampy TB moment.
I KNEW he was a werewolf! Show me his bare ass, and I’ll be able to recognise him! 😉
LOL! Luna, never thought of him that way!
He was awesome in Ugly Betty. As Cooter? Not so much. I don’t plan on ever watching something that stars Lindsay Lohan, but, having said that, Cooter would’nt have been my first choice for Dick. Matthew Settle looked like he would have been a better choice?
I agree with you, Matthew Settle would have been perfect for the role.
There is the possibility that they are already busting budget on this production, so Matthew did not accept first offer.
I don’t recall seeing him on trublood. Who does he play? I really wonder what lifetime is thinking. Didn’t Ms.Taylor’s family feel offended by the Lilo casting? So sick of her and I wish she would just go away.
Cooter, the werewolf from last season – just look at a picture of his nekkid ass, and you’ll be able to place him! 😉
Hope he gets combat pay and has an on-set clinic to run to.
HAHA! You always give great comments Brin. But seriously, I really feel sorry for this poor guy who has to kiss the Cracken for money. He better have Medusa’s head standing by.
If I was him, I would demand clinic screening from the bloated one before I touched her. Too many rumours about her STDs the past few years.
Is there such a thing as a mouth condom? Because if so, I would demand them in my contract.
Morning Original B. When I renew my first aid ticket we have access to what are called mouth guards. You put them over the vitctim’s mouth before rendering first aid to prevent fluid transfer. They ask you to keep one of these pocket mouth guards on your person at all times just in case. I’m sure CGI could hide the mask or he could put a light coat of cement on his lips first.
That’s brilliant, Lady D! (And Good Morning to you too.) Hopefully there enough money left for CGI, because if any movie’s gonna need it, it’s this one! 😉
They finally found some poor soul to take the part? After this we’ll never see him on TV again. Association with this movie/actress will kill his career.
“Lindsay Lohan finally found her Dick”
Me: http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lpnv9lkqzB1qafrh6.gif
Sorry.
Dude should see a doctor and take some vaccines before touching that. Just saying.
LOL at your gif!
Cute!
That’s really cute Lisa.
Like the stunt men who take high-powered antibiotics weeks before doing stunts in the Canals in Venice.
Don’t underestimate the Aussie’s.
We are a hard working bunch & stop at nothing to achieve goals & dreams. So what. he has to work with the greatest
crack-rastophre of this generation, no doubt he will succeed & hopefully cement himself in Hollywood.
Please do not attempt to speak on behalf of Australians… You’re making us look illiterate
He’s a New Zealander anyway. (But moved to Aussie at a young age)
Comon’ Aussie Common, common, we don’t need to quibble about this. We always claim NZers that come good (not that I’m sure this qualifies? Never even knew we could add him to the Aussie ‘cooter’ brigade..). Crowded House, Russel Crowe pre-violence, pavlova .. Because they all come to Aust before they go anywhere else. Just remember that NZ used to be a state of NSW (lol) and chillax ;o)
LOVE Crowded House!! My fave of their CD’s is in my car at all times!
Well, I understand why they would choose La Lohan to play an alcoholic who was a complete mess in her personal life. She has A LOT of experience to draw inspiration from, and can relate like no other (except maybe Courtney Love).
Whether she will truly follow in Elizabeth Taylor’s footsteps, and be a consumate professional while on set, is an entirely different matter altogether…
As for Grant Bowler, he doesn’t look much like Richard Burton, but appears to be a rather good and versatile actor. Let’s hope that he, alongside the director and the other cast members, can salvage this project.
By the way, in that top photograph, Lindsay looks like she just came out of The Night of the Living Dead – what’s up with the bloatedness, the bizarre patches of colour all over her face and the dead eyes? If she looks like this in her mid-twenties, I hate to imagine how she will look like in the forties.
Ms. Taylor was renowned to make it a point, in honor of her own amazingness, to always arrive late on set. A few hours late.
And so it was included by her own planning, to also arrive late for her very own funeral.
However, I respectfully disagree with your assessment of her boozing. She had a few years here and there, most notably during her marriages to Dick and that political figure, and right before husband Larry in construction, whom she met in rehab.
She did redeem herself though throughout her long life, and thrown herself into raising money and awareness for AIDS victims.
Lohan may be experienced with drugs alcohol and personal woes, but she’ll need more than that.
She needs insight, perspective and some craft. Things, she has none of. She’s just a screw-up with a pretty short resume and not much in the way of acting skill to fall back on.
We’ll see.
@ ‘Let’s hope that [Bowler], alongside the director and the other cast members, can salvage this project.’
Oh, no, LETS NOT!!!
WE ALL need this movie to fail miserably, for the future peace and freedom from Cracken!
If the movie flops, her ‘comeback’ (LMAO) will be a bust, and maybe, just maybe, finally, the end of her ‘career’ will dawn, and we’ll all be spared the decades of future bar fights, rehab stints, fake suicide attempts, drug overdoses, and perpetual wh0ring herself out to stay relevant. If the movie bombs, maybe it will become the final nail in the coffin of her career, and we’ll NEVER have to deal with her, hear of her, wonder about her, ever again……;)
One can dream
“they killed my Cooter” poor dude has to work with Crackie! 🙂 loved him in True Blood!
Hair Club for Men.
I was rooting for her…I really WAS – but not now…not after her antics on Glee. I finally have it driven into my head she will never change.
Her FU fingernail in court did it for me.
same here.
He was also on Ugly Betty. I’d have to look it up but I don’t think their story lines overlapped.
Hopefully he can just be professional and do his best with the role without getting sucked into the drama. Dude, whatever you do…please, please do not make a statement about how happy you are to work with Lohan.
looks like Budget Liam Neeson!
He is also a Big star in several Gay movies and appears in a lot of Gay Mags as a Hunk of the month thing….and was Gay on True Blood…..So does that give you a hint…….hint….hint…..
Oh the chemistry is going to be GOOD with Lindsay trying to seduce a gay guy so she can emulate Elizabeth “greatest love story in Hollywood.” and “explode with him into stardust” all over Hollywood …..
Excuse me while I puke !!!!
His character on True Blood wasn’t gay. He was the head honcho of the were pack & was engaged to Debbie, Alcide’s ex. They were both hooked on V.
Yes i know i need a life..
Then most of us do! Because we are hooked on V (can you wait any longer to see in whose neck – or oh-god-thigh – Christopher Meloni will be sinking his teeth into?)
And you are right, Cooter was straight and was always all over crazy Debbie.
Maguita – I’m thinkin’ Sookeh, because Christopher is supposed to be a V-E-R-Y powerful vampire (thus, probably more powerful than Beeeeell and Eric, *SPOILERS* both of whom Sookeh gave the kiss-off to in the finale). Which leads me to ask: When Sookeh was screaming for help after nutz-buttz Debbie shot Tara, why didn’t Beeeell and/or Eric respond to her cry for help?
(And she might end up with Alcide for a bit.)
@Luna, I was about to rage in Pam’s words about Sookie’s tour of magic p*ssy… But then I thought, better Sookie than that annoying Tara!!!
I can’t believe she would be happy with this guy as her Dick–didn’t she think one of the other guys was too old? This guy looks older than any of the 3 she rejected. I’ll just bet she is steaming mad over this casting choice.
Glad I kept scrolling before I posted a redundant comment!
This guy is clearly the oldest of the lot of them- what gives?
This bitch honestly makes me furious. Ugh.
I do not understand why there is so much drama over a Lifetime movie …
Because it’s LiLo and there is always drama around LiLo and because Thompson is totally stunt casting and he knows or thinks he knows we will tune in to watch the trainwreck.
I’m hoping the guy has made enough in Aussie Cinema to be able to retire or he has some kind of back up plan because he will spend the next 50 years of his life never working.
Because it’s DAME ELIZABETH! And THE CRACKEN is playing her!
‘Nuff said.
What is up with the bruises (or is that bronzer?) above her eyebrows in that first pic?
Just swiping Michael K’s headlines straight from DListed now…
Thompson, the producer, seems like he’s in White Oprah’s league in terms of promotion and grifting skills.
“The chemistry erupted in the room…”, what does that even mean?
It means she was hoping he could get her on True Blood.
HA! You’ve got that right!
I’m a chemist and can remember a few times when chemistry erupted in the room back in my student days. Lessee-there was the time I learned always to add concentrated sulfuric acid very slowly to a beaker of water to keep it from suddenly boiling from the heat released from mixing the two (still have a little spot on my cheek from a spatter to remind me) rather than trying to save time by dumping 50 mL of acid into 50 mL of water. Or the time I learned that a few ice cubes in water isn’t enough to keep some reactions that must be kept below 5 degrees centigrade from going beserk (I just added more ice while everything turned black and smoke came off, opened the window, and ran…) Once I also discovered making up a phosphorus pentoxide solution in a very long necked tiny volumetric flask is not a great idea – when everything went bubbly and sploosh and the mini-geyser shot to the ceiling, I grabbed the other person in the room and ran. Well, there’s good reason I stick to just translating chemistry now, too much running whenever chemistry erupted in the room. My sympathies to the Dick. There’s probably a cream he can get for the eruptions.
“Burton was a Welsh poet, a rascal, and a man’s man, who swept Elizabeth Taylor off her feet and flew her so close to the sun that they both exploded into stardust that still lights up Hollywood.”
That has to be the CHEESIEST line of text I have ever read (or, at least, have ever read this morning).
And the only thing that will happen with this pairing is that they will fly too close to the crack and explode into cocaine that still covers up Hollywood.
I LOVE the precision ” (burton)”. We all know she doesn’t have to search much for the other Dick.
Run, Dick, run!!!!
please tell me lohan has been photoshopped here for comic effect.
nobody can be that color, can they?
Why, hello, rugged Aussie actor face. He’s a brave soul to take this job. I’ll cut him slack because he’s Australian & may not be up-to-date on all of Lohan’s skullduggery.
I’ve decided to just watch this mess as a cartoon. Loh-Anime.
He’s actually from New Zealand (as it even states in the article). The Aussies always love to claim the Kiwi’s as ‘one of their own’ lol. Although he did move to Aussie at a young age.
Thank you thank you thank you! As a kiwi living in Europe it really grinds my gears how flippant everyone is with the Aussie/NZer thing. There is an actual ocean seperating the two guys!
How can some shiteous TV movie be a return to Hollywood?
True story: one of the little pop-up ads that appear over the pictures on this site popped up over the header photo. It said, “Need a loan?”
Damn, LL, when SPAMBOTS have your number, you’re really in a hole.
I am beginning to detest those pop-ups. It may be time for a Mozilla add-on.
I agree this guy doesn’t look like Burton, but, it’s a helluva lot closer than Crackzilla looking like Liz. Nasty just ain’t enough when trying to describe her. She needs a good head-washing, and the rest of her could use a scrubbin’ with a wire brush. This “movie” is a friggin’ nightmare….where can I send an e-mail to tell whoever is in charge what an idiot he is for doing this?
As much as I’m looking forward to reports of LL’s diva antics on-set from “sources close to the production”, I am wondering if the crew will have to sign some sort of confidentiality agreement to work on this film.
I would think the producers would want to minimize any bad press coming from LL’s on-set antics.
Except that she and her crew are usually the sources that are taking the pics and releasing “according to sources close to” quotes.
Another quote from thompson: “This movie will have as much sex as Lifetime will allow.”
I feel like gagging.
He was on ugly Betty and the now cancelled GCB, he’s hot!
I still can’t get over her FACE. Maybe she could have played Taylor a few years ago, but now everything about her is wrong. She’s going to need lessons in everything from keeping your eyes open to standing up straight to wearing underwear. A skanky ho is going to have to be a GREAT actress to play Liz! Good luck with this stinkbomb.
I cannot believe the press release! “Stardust”? No, that’s just pieces of scalp and lost cocaine flakes that are caked in Lohan’s busted weave.
***Head to desk***
Sigh
I really hope they have a REALLY good makeup artist or 2,3,4 on set…cuz it’s gonna take alot to make either look the part.
This is so funny because I know this guy!
His kids and my kids used to play together. He’s a really, really lovely, laid-back, nice guy, but heavens to Betsy, that dude has the most powerful set of f$5k-me eyes I’ve ever seen.
They make a girl go weak at the knees.
That dude is older than *I* am!!! That was my first reaction. How old was Richard Burton? I know nothing about him.
This guy looks like the idea I have of Richard Burton… rugged, older, blonde/light brown, some sun damage. However, my image of him is approximately the same age as Liz was at the time.
He does really annoying Bourbon and Cola adverts here in NZ, so I don’t think he has very high standards!
I feel bad for him. He doesn’t know what he is getting himself into by working with her.
Its Wolfgang West!
DAMN YOU GRANT BOWLER. First you were in that terrible Ayn Rand film, and now you are doing this. Do not make me call you desperate. SERIOUSLY.
Argh – he’s so well-loved in NZ because of Outrageous Fortune. WHYYYYY must he contaminate himself like this???
I believe, if memory serves me correctly, he hosted that game show The Mole here in Australia. He was pretty hot then.
JUST SOME AUSSIE DUDE?!
Unsulting to Australians, much?!
JUST SOME AUSSIE DUDE?!
Offensive to Australians, much?!
Just because he’s not American doesn’t mean he can’t act!!!! Compared to the train wreck Lilo, he’ll be up for an Oscar! Imagine that, “just some Aussie dude” winning an Oscar…. PFFFT!
Seeing as I didn’t write it, I can’t say for sure, but I seriously doubt that calling him ‘some aussie dude‘ was meant to be insulting, & I didn’t see anything implying that he couldn’t act well.
I think it’s just because there were some recognizable names already up for this role, but they went with someone relatively unknown (at least to Americans) instead.
Every time I see a picture of LL’s cracked up, jacked up, face, it makes me want to scream: SHE SHOULD NOT BE PLAYING THE GORGEOUS LIZ TAYLOR…whats next, Tori Spelling as Marilyn Monroe…Dear God!
Just some Aussie? Grant Bowler is quite a good Aussie actor – despite the fact that he will be working with cracky pants McGee.