Ryan Lochte’s choice for a desert island date: Blake Lively, “she is gorgeous”

I’ve come full circle this time around during the Olympics. I had a somewhat brief flirtation with Ryan Lochte, but I had to come back to Michael Phelps. Phelps is… The Man. Lochte is Not The Man. Lochte is super-cute, of course, but his personality is so lacking, I just can’t get hot for him at this point. I do kind of love how, within the span of a week, America kind of collectively got over Lochte, though. It was like all Americans just realized, “Oh, wow. He’s not as good as Phelps. And he’s kind of a fratty d-bag.”

So… I’m not sure if this is evidence of Lochte’s personality or if it just seems like lots of dudes are really into one specific blonde. But Lochte told Piers Morgan that his ideal woman (in a “desert island”-type situation) is Blake Lively. Piers asked, “If I could take you to a desert island it would be perfect for you, because you could swim all day long. A desert island and you could choose one famous woman to spend the rest of your life with, who would you take right now?” Ryan replies, “Right now, Blake Lively. Yeah, she is gorgeous.” Ryan’s potential pickup line: “I would be like, ‘Hi.’ I’d be like, ‘You want to go to an island with me?’”

I mean… I’m sure a lot of guys would choose Blake. I know many of you think she’s not cute, but I do think she’s a pretty girl, and her body is incredible (especially since she “doesn’t exercise”). My problem with Blake is that she seems to think, and others seem to think that her “look” is somehow high-fashion or some kind of revolutionary, iconic look… when really she’s just an attractive blonde with a “Mall Girl” vibe. So… what does this choice say about Ryan Lochte? That he probably likes the same big-boobed blondes that Ryan Reynolds goes for. I bet Lochte loves Reynolds’ ex-wife Scarlett Johansson too.

Oh, and Lochte pees in the pool too.

Photos courtesy of WENN, PCN.

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53 Responses to “Ryan Lochte’s choice for a desert island date: Blake Lively, “she is gorgeous””

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  1. CarrieUK says:

    I’ve done a complete 180 over the Olympics, Phelps is just too adorable, I was all about Lochte until he spoke! Phelps all the way thanks 🙂
    I live up in Manchester UK and I’ve never wanted to live in London ever….until now, the atmosphere is amazing and I’m SO PROUD!

  2. Scorellini says:

    Can somebody explain what “mall girl aesthetic” actually is. I’ve heard that several times in reference to Blake Lively but I can’t figure it out, and couldn’t find any wikipedia entries either.

    • Mia says:

      I don’t know exactly how Kaiser means it, but “mall girl” usually refers to the stereotypical peroxide blonde that you find always hanging out at the mall in little groups, wearing things that were popular more in highschool (eg. Crop tops, glitter eyeshadow, little handbags with large logos). Kind of like the plastics in Mean Girls (Lindsay Lohan, Rachel McAdams and crew). Pretty, a little trashy/common, but not very high fashion.

      • iseepinkelefants says:

        I think you just answered it COMMON. Cliche, dime a dozen. Blake Lively is vanilla. Go to the suburbs and you’ll find a few Blake Livelys.

        It also doesn’t help that she only acheieved her “beauty” by fixing her schnoz. It’s not even natural beauty (and yes I’m aware that millions of Hollywood girls get their noses twerked, which is why I don’t think very many woman in Hollywood are beautiful).

        If she were talented I’d give her a pass but she’s neither beautiful nor talented. She’s the new flavor of the month, much like ScarJo before her, it will pass.

  3. Leen says:

    My aunt met him this weekend (she’s on the Palestinian olympics team) and she said he was gorgeous and actually really nice and bless him not really bright but a really friendly guy. It doesn’t hurt he’s easy on the eyes tho…

    • Momoftwo says:

      Yeah I don’t get a d-bag vibe from him. More like a “not the sharpest tool in the shed” vibe.

      But he seems very sweet and I love how phelps and lochte have showed its possible to have a friendly and respectful competition with someone.

      But I am back in love with phelps too. He sounds so thoughtful and honest. Love his interaction with chad le clos.

      In a way I am glad he lost that 200 fly final cuz we got to see a guy who grew up idolizing phelps and the pure joy to actually beat him. And we got to see a sweet and gracious side of phelps.

  4. GoodCapon says:

    Kaiser, have you covered that story where his parents are allegedly facing foreclosure? Is there any truth in that?

  5. Jen34 says:

    I think his mom’s comment, along with his less than dazzling personality, hurt his appeal.

    • Garrish Utley says:

      Yes, why would she want to date Mr. Pee-in-the-pool, One-night-stand?

      • molly says:

        Phelps said that he has peed in the pool as well so I dont know what the big deal is. People are just looking for things to tear down Lochte and build up Phelps and CB is buying right into it.
        Anyway, Lochte is a sweetie. He may not be the brightest bulb in the tanning bed, but douchebag he is not.

  6. Smashley says:

    I’ve like Lochte since Beijing so I’m not going to dislike him because he is dumb. As long as he is nice and a talented athlete, I’ve got to respect that. I love those dumb videos of Ryan on YouTube, really funny! As for Phelps, my like for him is back and forth. I really do believe he’s a dbag, unlike Lochte who comes off douchey because he’s dumb, and that turns me off. I do think Phelps is an incredible athlete and I wish he’d swim in Rio.

  7. NYC_girl says:

    I know it’s gross, but I don’t think it’s unheard of that they pee in the pool. If you’re practicing, OK – you can get out and go, but … I’m thinking they all do it at the end of the race when they’re waiting to see their time. I heard that runners in the NY Marathon pee on themselves (and worse) during a race. What else can they do?

    @GoodCapon – I read that story about his parents’ foreclosure too, in the Daily News.

    • Rachel says:

      I thought the same thing. These people live in the water. I’m sure it’s not at all uncommon for them to pee in the pool. And it’s probably not a big deal to people in the sport.

      • iseepinkelefants says:

        Ex-swimmer here and no I never peed in the pool. That’s disgusting. Walk your lazy ass to the locker rooms.

        I used to throw up a little in my mouth when other swimmers would put the water in their mouth and spit it out.

        Maybe I’m too much of a germaphobe but I would even rinse off before entering the pool (we used to practice at the end of the day so I mean you sweat ya know). It’s just basic manners. I mean we all have to swim in that water.

      • molly says:

        Have you ever seen what pure chlorine does to your skin or clothes? You will never wonder about the cleanliness of a pool ever again, no matter how many people pee in it.

      • yy says:

        swimmer here.
        everyone pees in the pool. first off, theres enough chlorine in the pool to kill the germs. secondly, the volume of water in a pool is such that even if everyone is peeing there really won’t be any effect.
        especially in practice. getting out in the middle of a set to go to the bathroom and relieve yourself is frowned upon. just go in the pool.

    • Garrish Utley says:

      When runners lose control of their bodily functions, it’s an accident. This guy does it on purpose. George Costanza anyone?

  8. phoenix says:

    I don’t know why they keep covering the foreclosure thing though. He can obviously save the house now?!

  9. TheOriginalKitten says:

    I can’t really imagine the kind of conversations Lively and Lochte would have…

  10. mila says:

    In movies one of the things that is always shawn as all American is blond, blue eyed girl with sun kissed skin. Blake fits the profile. I think she is average looking, hardly high fashion. I get why guys like her.

  11. cupidityrox! says:

    Lol! This athletes just seem to pick the current flavour of the month. I believe back in 08 when Phelp’s had won all those medals he said his dream woman would be Lindsay Lohan

  12. puffyschmuffy says:

    I’m in a minority on the High Fashion aesthetic, as I agree with what someone wrote on Blake’s resemblance to Elaine Irwin (Elaine said it herself)
    I would LOVE Lochte and Scarlett to get together. Gossip heaven. But Scarlett fancies herself an intellectual and Ryan’s as dumb as a bag of spanners.
    Oh but it would be great for gossip!

  13. Az says:

    OMG .. As a box of rocks, bless his heart.

  14. Kasey says:

    Does he always have stuff on his teeth like that? (sorry haven’t watched or followed the Olympics). In that front shot he kinda looks like Channing Tatum….or Wentworth Miller (?). I get the two confused although the Prison Break guy is VERY attractive.

  15. Vivian says:

    Sigh…there’s more than the outside physical appearances; I was hoping he would say something like someone with a great personality, wits, sense of humor and if she looked like (whoever– even insert Blake here), I would have loved him a lot more and it would up his appeal so much more. in the end, a bit shallow and TMI with mom comments and the #1 in the pool etc.

  16. Tanya says:

    it’s so true..guys have a different version of what beauty is compared to women. I think she is moderately attractive at best. My male friend thinks J Aniston is stunning..stunning?.. really?… and I think she is actually sort of manish looking. beauty is totally in the eye of the beholder. 😉

  17. Sakyiwaa says:

    I like this guy :-)and Phelps? Phelps will ALWAYS be adored.

  18. Sakyiwaa says:

    Lochte is so adorable. The dumb Youtube videos are hilarious!

  19. Sakyiwaa says:

    Lochte is so adorable. The dumb Youtube videos are hilarious! Lochte still my temp crush 🙂

  20. ramona says:

    I’ve decided Ryan and I are related (he and my hubby share a surname) and therefore I feel I can tell him this, as family: “Take that STUPID thing off of your teeth! Seriously, you look like a moron. Name one person besides yourself who thinks that looks cool. Drawing a blank? Are you? I thought so. Now spit that out, pick up a book, and grow up a little. Sheesh. Nice abs, though.”

  21. mek821 says:

    He is as dumb as a box of hair. Dumbness is never ever attractive!

  22. Maggie says:

    The poor guy is getting so much bad publicity I’m starting to feel sorry for him. He is dumb but that can be worked on, the important thing is whether he is a good guy or not and how he treats other people. He’s just having fun and if he’s not hurting anyone, then it shouldn’t really matter how he dresses or how many grills he owns.

  23. Yadicakes says:

    He is cute in that all American boy way. Except for the grill and his crush on blake lively :/ Phelps not physically attractive but he’s got that whole Olympian athletic champ hotness going on.

  24. tifygodess24 says:

    Ryan Lochte is the type you would say when with him- “Hush baby, don’t speak – you are so sexy when you don’t say a word , let me just look at you” LOL

  25. Stacie says:

    I kinda agree with you . I think I was kinda taken by Ryan’s looks but then some of the things he was saying about women was kind of a turn off. He’s what I like to call a Stop and Stare. Just stand there pretty with No talking .:)

    • lizzi says:

      Now i’m curious. Do you have a link for this? Now i wanna know what he said about women haha my panties were never wet for him. just sayin’.

  26. hoya_chick says:

    “My last Olympics, I had a girlfriend — big mistake,” Ryan previously told ESPN. “Now I’m single, so London should be really good. I’m excited.”

    He really said this….d-bag for sure. Along with the grillz, the Lively thing, and the one night stand thing. Eww he is gross to me now. Over it. Nathan Adrian for the win! He is sooooo hot and a sweetheart.

  27. Casey says:

    At first I hated him for being dumb but the more I see, it makes me laugh. NOT the kind of person you’d want to be stuck on an island with unless he was gonna tow you back to the mainland. On the Lochte vs. Phelps debate, I defer to Nathan Adrian. He’s crazy adorable and graduated with honors from Berkeley. Swimmers body, great smile, and he wants to be a doctor. Get in line.

  28. erika says:

    god help him he is sooooo stupid….
    not only are his ears full of water the sponge between those two ears aren’t soaking up much knowledge either…he is a TWAT!


  29. iseepinkelefants says:

    And that just answered everything you need to know about him.

    Never saw it, never will. Pass.

    And can I just say I am loving the fact that this guy brings out the dudes in all of us. LOL! Comment after comment is along the lines of “I would bang him but tell him not to speak” ahahaha. Love it.

  30. erika says:

    can i just say one more time…’God he’s DUMB’

    my idea of a NIGHTMARE would be stuck on an island with this dude! he has nothing to say,…

    “Me (grunt grunt) me RYAN, (grunt) me, MAN…uhhhh…durrhhh….me pound chest (grunt) me…banana…mmmm..mouth…”

  31. S says:

    Lively is total dumb-dude crush material. Ge-ne-ric.

    Okay, so Lochte isn’t bright. But he’s not necessarily a d-bag. He’s just too dim to know when to put a sock in it. It seems to be genetic (I’m looking at you, Momma Lochte).

    Phelps knows how to handle himself better in the media. He’s also apparently dating a model/actress who’s been tweeting her luuurrve for him fangirl-style. Gold digger alert.

    No doubt Phelps is a tremendous athlete and deserves acclaim, but he doesn’t seem modest in the least. Wasn’t he basically comparing his greatness to Michael Jordan’s a couple days ago? Meh. Not into it. Greatness on any level is most attractive when it’s paired with a healthy dose of humility.

  32. MK says:

    Jason Stackhouse, is that you?

  33. michelle smith says:

    I would totally date him! I think he is amazing even tho people say that he is stupid. But I wish if I knew if he liked black females….. gotta meet him one day in 2036

  34. michelle smith says:

    I would totally date him! I think he is amazing even tho people say that he is stupid. But I wish if I knew if he liked black females…..