Kate Upton scored her second consecutive SI: Swimsuit Edition cover: cute?

One of the weirdest parts of my job as a blogger who happens to be female seems to be trying to “adopt” the heterosexual male gaze long enough to adequately judge some of this celebrity stuff. Like, the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition is not made me for me. It’s made for straight dudes who want to look at models in swimsuits. So, let me put on my straight-dude goggles and look at the 2013 SI: Swimsuit Edition cover, which features Kate Upton for the second time in a row. If you remember, I didn’t care for her first cover that much – there was too much Photoshopping of her crotch area, and it made me feel like I was staring at a Barbie (as in, her biscuit seemed to be made out of smooth plastic).

So, what do you think of this year’s cover? I think I like it more than last year’s. Her biscuit isn’t ‘Shopped into oblivion (that I can tell…?) and even though her rack is front and center, I have to admit that I prefer this to seeing her spill out of a too-small bikini top. I even think the coat is kind of cute! I’ll also admit that Kate is doing what I do when I want to get some dude’s attention – casually pushing her boobs together with her upper arms and forearms. It’s an old trick. You push ‘em together and then lean forward a little bit, keeping your chin down and then you look up at the dude enigmatically. Gets ‘em every time.

Apparently, Kate’s photoshoot was done on a boat in Antarctica. This is the first time since 1988 that a model has gotten consecutive covers – that model was Elle Macpherson (and she was featured for three consecutive years). Oh, and this is the 50th anniversary issue. We’re seeing the cover now because it leaked on Friday and SI pushed up their big reveal, which was originally scheduled for Monday. The Swimsuit Edition will also feature Hannah Davis (Derek Jeter’s girlfriend), Julie Henderson, Miss Alabama 2012 Katherine Webb, Alyssa Miller and Nina Agdal. Congrats to Kate! She’ll get even more work now, and I wouldn’t be surprised at all if she scored her first American Vogue cover this year.

Photos courtesy of SI’s Twitter.

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176 Responses to “Kate Upton scored her second consecutive SI: Swimsuit Edition cover: cute?”

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  1. Cleveland Girl says:

    I like this cover, but she looks kind of pudgy. It almost looks like they photoshopped her to look bigger.

    • SmokeyBlues says:

      You are out of your mind

    • V4real says:

      Here’s the thing about Kate; she’s not fat but she does have an unflattering waistline. Let’s be real she has love handles and she needs to work on her abs in order to improve the shape. I’m not being mean, I’m being real. Models are inthe business of beauty so you would expect them to look a certain way. SmokeyBlues you are not out of your mind , you’re spot on

      • Suzen says:

        I sort of agree. She is not a typical stick-thin model and has gotten alot of flack for her “pudgy” frame from some people. Others feel she is inspirational. I think it’s something in the middle. Curves are fab, so is a bit of toning. She (without photoshopping) is quite rollypolly and has cellulite. Much like the rest of us normal folk. Either way, she is undeniably beautiful!

      • TG says:

        Totally agree with you. She has no shape. Yes, she has big breasts and they look fake, but she has not waist. I don’t think someone has to be stick thin to be attractive and if she had actual curves she would look better. She is gross and repulsive to me, but I am not a man so it probably doesn’t matter.

      • Mich says:

        @ TG

        I agree. She has absolutely no waist. I thought she looked stunning in that recent shoe campaign but in a bathing suit the only thing going for her is enormous tatas.

      • Ericka says:

        Her boobs do not look fake! at all!

    • Abra says:

      Pudgy? You must be a size 0 if you’re saying THAT is pudgy.

      • andrea says:

        Please check the un-Photoshopped photos at TMZ. She does look very pudgy around the waist and upper arms. Kate needs to visit the gym or get herself a personal trainer because she really does look quite out of shape. Which wouldn’t be a big deal if she wasn’t a swimsuit/glamor model who requires hours of airbrushing.

    • Cleveland Girl says:

      I didn’t say she was pudgy. I said she “looks” kind of pudgy. I love her body. I feel that this photo is unflattering.

    • Hubbahun says:

      In what sick universe could she ever be described as pudgy!!!??? She’s gorgeous, give me her figure over a skinny minnie any day!

      • Alexandra Bananarama says:

        Yes! She looks a little pudgy. They didn’t photoshop where the string hits her hip. It cuts in a little bit and looks realistic.

        She’s a thin, pretty woman, but she’s not toned anymore. She’s not out of shape, but not nearly as thin as she was a year ago. It looks weird to see a smooth, flat stomach without some ab and hip definition.

        IMO SI is going for good PR by putting her on and not photo shopping her as much as last time, but she’s just not right for these shoots. She barely looks athletic anymore.

      • Liv says:

        But why didn’t they photoshopped her abs? They obviously photoshopped her breasts, they can’t be real! ;-)

    • Sharon says:

      I don’t like this cover at all. She looks cheap and vulgar. She doesn’t have real model quality. Not that face, not that body. She can be “VS model” but nothing more. There is someone who really try to make her happen but it doesn’t work at all.

      • Kat says:

        Remember those raunchy Terry Richardson photos of her? Well, insider info is that he opened doors for her after she slept with him on set.

      • Kat says:

        Remember those raunchy Terry Richardson photos of her? Well, insider info is that he opened doors with the fashion ppl after she slept with him on set, supposedly.

    • Turtle Dove says:

      Kate has so many gorgeous physical qualities: pretty face, tall, lean, amazing breasts, nice smile, etc. Plus, she seems like a real sweetheart to boot.

      I do not think that she’s fat at all, but her midsection is not appealing. I was reading some comments from guys on another site and one poster said that they found an interesting way to hide her out of shape mid-section with the coat. Kinda true.

      Truth be told, none of us can slam her too much. She’s famous, making really good money, appearing on magazine covers and we’re posting about her, so who’s really winning here?

      • emmie_a says:

        I think you hit it: She’s not pudgy but her midsection is not toned at all. She has long thin legs then a rounder stomach area.
        And I think this cover is just as photoshopped as the last one bc her boobs are magically squeezed together but if you look at her arms she is not squeezing anything. I don’t think it’s a flattering picture of her at all. Yes her boobs look huge but the rest of her is sort of blah.

    • DGO says:

      I know what you mean, Cleveland Girl. You’re not insulting Kate, you’re talking about the photograph. I think they tried to make her look extra voluptuous,and it made her look thicker than what she really is.

    • Bobby sue says:

      Why can’t this be a new standard, or a throw-back standard as opposed to endless anorexic looking models?

    • AmyB says:

      You don’t know what men find attractive, obviously, they like tits and ass, while we women starve ourselves sometimes. She is a beautiful girl. Spare me. I have been a size 2 or 4 for years, gained some weight recently from thyroid issues, and my boobs are way bigger like people would get breast surgery to have what I do. I get hit on by men daily. Stop being mean. She is not pudgy in anyway shape or form.

  2. T.Fanty says:

    I saw a poster for the Swimsuit Edition the other day, and was surprised to see such blatant, old-fashioned sexism still promoted as openly as it was – or even that it still exists. It feels archaic that this edition only exists for the purpose of male ogling. And so safe. When one considers the ubiquity of internet p0rn, it seems almost quaint. How is this still a thing?

    • RocketMerry says:

      Let’s just be honest here and truly look at this cover photo. Honestly. Really. It’s p0rny, but not really p0rn, right? And it’s for guys, and this is all they are used to and it’s the only thing they understand, I get all that. But, in the age of the 24/7 internet p0rn, shouldn’t magazines and calendars try to educate the male mind a bit? To be into the excitement and sensuality of more hidden …hum… treasures? Why buy a magazine, otherwise? Just open that laptop.

      Well, anywoo, this is also right up Upton’s alley. This is her style, her vibe: dumb but sweet girl with big breasts and a permanently open mouth. This is her kind of fashion.

    • stellalovejoydiver says:

      blatant, old-fashioned sexism will always exist, it just gets market as faux feminism, “I am a modern woman, strong and free, therefore I can choose to sexually exploit myself”:

      SI isn’ t the worst, because they target men, VS is a lot worse because they target women by targeting men.

      • Evelyn says:

        I’m always confused by feminism and sexism. Which isn’t to say it’s confusing, but there’s a huge spectrum of how different ladies feel about it. I mean, you are very right, this issue is almost pointless, I’m assuming it still sells well enough because it is the swimsuit issue. And I see how its sexist, but it IS the swimsuit edition, but somehow I’m less offended as woman than I am by porn. As far as the Victoria’s Secret thing, I think you’re right. I’ve always bought their sweatshirts and whatnot, but I never bought really anything else until I had a boyfriend. That’s an interesting point that I’ve never considered

      • bluhare says:

        Well, it’s SPORTS Illustrated. Why the need for a swimsuit edition? The only swimsuits in sports are one piece if you’re a competitive swimmer or sports top and bikini bottoms for beach volleyball. I’m with stellalovejoydiver.

      • Bubbling says:

        oh stella how I love thee! you killed it in one sentence, nothing better!

      • Beatriz says:

        Spot on! Btw really good article, thanks for linking.

      • minime says:

        Well said Stella!

        @ Evelyn

        Well, to me is totally the opposite. I feel a lot more offended with this kind of magazines than with P0rn. At least the last is openly what it is and women who work on it are also open about what is their real work (with which I have no problem with). In these kind of magazines, women call themselves models and pretend that they are selling something else that not really their body to a chauvinist society that in a great percentage sees women in a daily basis as objects.

    • Jo 'Mama' Besser says:

      I don’t know. I think she looks perfectly good but that’s unrelated to the fact that the whole SI Swimsuit thing is just lame.

  3. Victoria1 says:

    I wish I had her boobs.

    • Stuart Horsely says:

      Fakers?? You could if you could afford them. And no arguments – they ARE fake.

      • Evelyn says:

        Are they? They must be good, they looked very real on last years cover

      • booger says:

        So what? Nice tits are nice tits.

      • Alexandra Bananarama says:

        Where is your proof that they’re fake? It must just be your opinion because they look real. In her poses and on a video where she was walking wearing no bra they swung and bounced like real breasts. The sag wouldn’t be as pronounced as it is if they were fake. They edit the sag away in photos and she’s always lifting her chest and arching her back.

      • Isa says:

        I don’t think they’re fake. Have you seen how much the giggle?! They’re not firm at all.

      • emmie_a says:

        I don’t think they’re fake. Kate has an apple shape, which means she carries all of her weight on top and has thin legs — and a lot of apple shaped women have large busts.

      • Issa says:

        Not fake. She jiggles to much for them to be fake. Watch her videos of her walking down the runway, she’s all over the place.

      • Stuart Horsely says:

        Fakers jiggle, too, and look real. They’re real because they “look real?” Her first SI cover says itall. Bulk at the top, too round, too far apart. Not that I needed proof, but here’s a link. Look at this picture and tell me they’re real, when you can see the whole outline of the implant, NOT!


      • Alexandra Bananarama says:

        I know too many girls with very petite, athletic, thin frames and they have natural D’s. I bet a plastic surgeon would also say the “may” have implants. It’s far from proof.

        Dislike her because it’s a SI pr move. Dislike her because she’s just not fit for high fashion or swimsuits. Just don’t dislike her because her breasts are awesome. Give it 10 years.

      • Ericka says:

        why do you want them to be fake so bad? stop projecting your insecurities. I’m sorry you don’t have big boobs, if you did you would know they’re real lol

      • vvvoid says:

        Oh please.
        Her boobs are real. Large, round breasts do exist in the natural world. Plenty of these such breasts can be found on the chests of thin, even thinner women. Naturally.
        Using the SI covers to substantiate your claims that they are fake, or any professional photos really, is preposterous because they get photoshopped to hell.
        She has absolutely no “tells” in terms of a boob job. No ridge where the implant sits can be seen whatsoever, and her breasts are very soft, they probably feel like pudding if you poke them.
        I am not “into” Kate Upton but my god, when I see people claiming her breasts are fake I facepalm so hard. What very large breasted, thin bodied celebrity does have real breasts, if not Kate Upton?

      • Lizzie says:

        I have a similar body shape to Kate’s, and I also have fake breasts (32DDD). No one has EVER guessed they are fake, not even dumb guys who claim to hate fake boobs, but didn’t realize they had fake ones in their hands at the time. Well done fake breasts that are appropriate for one’s body size can hang, sag, and jiggle just like their natural counterparts.

      • vvvoid says:

        @Lizzie…I’ve seen boob jobs that didn’t look fake, but I knew they were fake because I was told. Mostly in women who had room in the breast tissue to accommodate the implant. But if every time we see a celebrity with a nice rack, we start up the “they must be fake” broken record, what then is the criteria? Big breasts? Famous+lean/ideal/normal weight+nice, large, round breasts=boob job? Idgi.

    • Suzen says:

      eh, they look bigger than her head.

    • Kloops says:

      If those are fake I’d kill to know how they achieved this and who her surgeon is. I think she has a great body and love that she isn’t rail thin with a teeny tiny waist. It’s still largely unachievable for most mere mortals, but there is a tiny element of ‘realness’ that is appealing.

    • Bobby sue says:

      They’re real. It’s her natural physique…tall, thin legs, and bigger stomach/boob area. My BF has this exact same frame and I watched her grown into those boobs! She gains weight in her face, though, too. Not all women with large breasts are silicone! The problem is fakes are so standard now we forget that there is a percentage of women are are genetically, naturally endowed.

  4. merski says:

    I like Kate, I think she’s a really sexy girl but this cover is just gross. Her breasts look photoshopped and unnatural – it’s so unattractive. And she’s really cute in real life so I really don’t understand what happened here…

    • Cleveland Girl says:

      I agree with you completely. But apparently I am out of my mind, as noted in the first post.

      • merski says:

        I think the word “pudgy” caught everyone’s attention and then it got out of hand ;) But I know what you mean! To take such a pretty, curvy girl, photoshop her beyond oblivion and make her boobs look twice the size of her head should be a crime! She’s got a great body and instead they made her look like a plastic doll with huge bolt-ons. Shame on you, SI!

    • Melissa says:

      Agreed! Her boobs look really weird in this picture, like they either photoshopped the rest of her body and her boobies were untouched or the opposite. I don’t know. The picture draws my attention but not in a good way. =/

      • Zoid says:

        Agreed again!
        But personally I find the boobs-larger-than-your-head look unattractive. In other shots her boobs look great. This, not so much.

    • Ange says:

      I agree, she’s giving terrible face just like last year. It just shows where the magazine’s priorities lie when they put two pics that look like that on the cover. All b00bs and biscuit and a blah head.

  5. Lolly says:

    Wow. The inventor of the bikini certainly had Kate’s body type in mind when he designed it. Also do I spy Emily Didonato on the other cover? Now that girl’s face is flawless. I’m buying this!

  6. Eleonor says:

    This cover is better than the last one, and even if she has great boobs, they aren’t as big as those in the picture.

  7. Embee says:

    Totally cute.

  8. LAK says:

    This looks like an old school playboy cover.

    • j.eyre says:

      Spot on. That is what it looks like: “Oh, I walked out to look at the iceberg and realized I forgot my shirt! Thank goodness I have a hood.”

    • bluhare says:

      Which is pretty much what it is. Do they still have the naked women with body paint on? Haven’t looked at one in a long time.

  9. Jewbitch says:

    I think her boobs look terrible.
    Cute girl, though.

  10. Wow, I used to think my boobs were big but they are like mosquito bites compared to Kate’s – jealous!

  11. Toot says:

    Kate is cute and has great boobs, but the rest of her body looks like Kei$ha’s. Square with no waist and an ugly ass.

  12. judyjudy says:

    She’s my body double. Looking at this cover is like looking in a mirror.

    Ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha! Haaaaa….damn it.

  13. Stuart Horsely says:

    Aside fromt he fakers, I still think she’s beautiful and I don’t get all the negativity.

  14. Lisa says:

    She looks cute but every Kate Upton photo shoot makes her look stupid. Like she doesn’t have ah interesting thought in her brain. There are so many that can look sexy and smart.

  15. Cherry says:

    This photoshoot was done on a boat in Antarctica? SERIOUSLY? If that’s true (which I doubt- it looks photoshopped), the people at Sports Illustrated are a bunch of sadistic twats. Why the hell would you go to south pole to photograph a girl in her underpants?

  16. j.eyre says:

    I saw these yesterday and I had some odd reactions to it:
    1) oh honey! Get her a blanket. Seriously, she has to be freezing.
    2) I really like the font “Swimsuit 2013″ is written
    3) wow, those are some boobs
    4) why is she making such a dull face?

    So I guess I am not SI’s demographic.

    • Keats says:

      yeah, what is the deal with her face? She’s got great features, maybe they just consistently photoshop all of her personality out of it? She’s left looking a little like a confused fem-bot.

      • Irishae says:

        TMZ posted pics back when it was being done. They really were in Antarctica, despite the almost fake-looking image. It was apparently below zero and she was trying not to look pained. Still, I agree that they could have found a better shot of her face or…done something. Either way, she looks amazing and I like the cover.

  17. Jenna says:

    Eh…I don’t know. You notice her boobs before anything else.

  18. Elceibeno says:

    I wonder how many teenage boys are going to touch themselves looking at kate’s pictures.

  19. booger says:

    I LOVE Kate simply because of the fury and vitriol she instigates in the fashion community from bitter jellies who can’t wrap around her being on the cover of Vogue Italia and all the attention she receives. Her very presence shines a light on just how horrible, elitist, pretentious, and utterly ridiculous the fashion and modelling industries really are.

    Good work, Kate. Carry on.

    • Lolly says:

      Finally someone that gets it! It’s the Oh she’s so budget blah blah comments that made me really start liking her. The fashion world acts like what they do is oh so important. Can’t wait for 2030 when we’ll all be wearing form fitting lycra bodysuits(@least according to sci-fi movies)

      • booger says:

        SERIOUSLY!!! As if Victoria’s Secret, couture runway shows, and magazine editorial spreads are consecrated holy grounds where only the righteous should set foot.

        Models and designers: you sell and make fancy clothes. You are not saving lives or curing cancer. GET OVER YOURSELVES.

    • menlisa says:

      All of this!!!

    • stellalovejoydiver says:

      I found that Victoria’s Secret statement about her particulary disgusting Kate has “that kind of face that anyone with enough money can go out and buy.”

      I mean really, you got models like Miranda Kerr, Behati Prinsloo (Adam leDouche gf), Erin Heatherton and a couple other generic models, except for Adriana, Alessandra, Doutzen and Candice, to rep you and you don’t want Kate, she is prettier than the before mentioned.
      Considering that they rather hire Karlie Kloss than her, it is pretty obvious that this is a weight issue, but yeah VS is all about celebrating women’s bodies.

    • Annamaria says:

      I agree with all of this! :)

    • A. says:

      Yes, Booger. I so agree. That’s why I love Kate so much. A middle finger to the haters from beautiful Kate.

  20. T.C. says:

    Better cover than last year but too much boob on display.

  21. squeakie says:

    im really not all that impressed with Kate Upton, shes a cute girl with a cute figure but nothing about her look is super original or unique. I remember when she was in vogue and I was hearing about what a good step for fashion it was to feature a model who wasnt emaciated and I just find it so depressing that this forward thinking leads us to a pretty blonde with huge boobs…really???

    • Zoid says:

      Thank you! She’s still stick thin, the only difference is she had large tits! Yeah we’re really moving forward! Just another insecurity to add to the list for women, now you have to flat stomached but have real double DD’s!

  22. PHD Gossip says:

    Didn’t Tyra Banks score consecutive covers in the late 90s?

  23. Jackson says:

    All I see when I look at this cover are how ginormous her boobs look. I get that she’s smooshing them together but still. Geez. The only thoughts that pop in my head are “Coco” and “honeydew melons.” That being said, I imagine that’s the look SI was going for. The rest of her pic looks, eh, like she always looks. Kind of budget, kind of girl next door who works at the Dairy Queen.

  24. Rita says:

    America’s recipe for fame and fortune: Cute face and a nice rack.

  25. Nicolette says:

    Her boobs look so much bigger because she is doing the old push and squeeze with her arms, just as mentioned above. It is an old trick that does indeed “get ‘em every time”. It’s a subtle way to get my husband to stop talking about hockey and bring his attention to something else LOL. It can make you look much bigger than you are in the cleavage area. I don’t think she has fake breasts, they flop around too much for that to be the case. Either way, we are not the target audience of that cover, and I’m sure the guys are loving it.

    That said, she kinda has a porn vibe to her. She’s very pretty, and I thought she looked beautiful on the red carpet at some event recently with her hair up and a nice dress on. It seems to me like she’s becoming just about her boobs, not her pretty face, and that cheapens her in some way.

    • Rita says:

      I saw the pictures of this shoot where she wasn’t wear the coat. She was wearing only a string top. There is no push and squeeze involved here. She has blossomed into a very buxom gal.

      Google: Kate Upton Cold Photoshoot.

      • Christina says:

        NOBODY has tits which naturally meet in the middle. It’s anatomically impossible. Even fake ones can’t manage that. So either she’s doing the ol’ push ‘n’ squeeze or the pic has been photoshopped – perhaps both.

        As for this photo, it’s tacky and predictable – chick with big tits and vacant face. No doubt the lads will love it, but this is the type of ‘modelling’ Kate is good for. No more trying to pretend she’s some sort of high fashion model or that having a stereotypical teenaged boy’s fantasy is something to celebrate. Please.

      • Rita says:

        I’m going to take the high road here and refuse to get into a bitch fight about Kate Upton’s tits….LOL.

  26. Claire says:

    Why do they always put her in those tiny tie up bikini bottoms that cut into her sides and made her look… weird?!?

  27. Wilma says:

    I don’t really like her boobs. I mean, she looks good and all, but I think they’re to big for her. You can see the sagging in other pictures and here they feel like ‘udders’. She’ll need surgery in the near future to keep them a bit perky. Maybe she hasn’t used the right kind of support so far.

  28. dcypher1 says:

    I think this cover is way better than last years not so much vadge. She has really nice boobs and shes not fat at all and u guys who say she is are just jealous and hatin. But to me shes a just a doppleganger of anna nicole smith.

  29. Bronwyn says:

    They definitely did something weird with her head and body proportions!
    LOOK HOW TINY HER ACTUAL HEAD LOOKS compared with her body!! It is hilarious.
    I love her, i think she’s great. I love her body, she has a pretty face, but it looks like they shrunk her head to fit with the giant hood in the coat…is it just me??!

    • mia girl says:

      I see it too. It’s like they shrunk her head so her breasts would be even more pronounced.

      I’m pretty sure they were going for the male visceral reaction…
      B :) :) B I E S

      They even overuse the letter B to suggest it. The entire cover is blue and they there are four capital Bs in the general area of her breasts!

  30. Starlight says:

    I can’t believe this. Why her? We are talking about fitness magazine here. They should have picked Bar Rafaeli.

  31. Isa says:

    I think this cover is a lot better than the other. Her face looks 10x better. In the other shot it was weird and shadowy. Her body looks a lot better in this photo.
    And yes her boobs look bigger than normal and bigger than her head because she’s squishing them together with her arms.

  32. MollyB says:

    I just like her. She seems funny and sweet and I love her body. I guess I’ve just burned out on the seven feet tall, ribbed abs, bolt-on, concave thighs of the last ten or so years. She’s got big, natural looking boobs, a flat but soft waist, slender but still fleshy legs. Most of the straight men I know would rather roll in the hay with her than any of the bony, statuesque VS models.

    • Ericka says:

      Its also nice to relate to her, as far as being in shape. I never really work out and because of that I go up and down. Don’t get me wrong, its important to be healthy and I will conquer it one day!!! But, like I was saying, sometimes my stomach looks like hers! We should be thankful that we can see a normal woman applying herself and making a dream come true. Can only keep moving in a better direction. I believe women lack self control at times and bully others. Ever try to tell a female about herself? Defensive, mean and rude! I love women, I think we are the foundation of all things..but self control is something they tend to lack and that’s what holds us back! Examples being, self centered, overly critical, controlling, too emotional, dramatic, and far too opinionated(which can be a waste of time). Obviously, I am focusing on things that should and can be changed. We all know the positive sides…just think it would be nice to talk about the elephant in the room!

  33. Sugar says:

    Im looking pretty hot right now I’m in my fleece pj’s, total bedhead hair & nerd glasses but I so agree with your earlier comment about America using sex to sell-sad because speaking for myself & safely can say most friends purchases consumed are not brought about because of someones sexiness to sell-it’s a want or need or I have to have.

    • Sugar says:

      weird I thought I replied to the 2nd Elceibeno comment which I don’t see so my comment makes no sense- so I will say something about the cover
      I don’t like it-but I’m not sure why. It’s conflicting the winter coat & string bottoms but maybe that’s the look they were going for sexy no matter the season that’s Kate!

  34. Jayna says:

    One of the worst covers I have ever seen for SI. They usually do great covers. What were they thinking? I like last year’s cover better, actually.

  35. palermo says:

    She has a flat butt, chicken legs and no waistline whatsoever. The bikini bottoms they put her in call attention to that. But she has those boobs (some docs say they are fake) so that gets her the job. She also has an uncle who is a Representative in Congress which I’m sure opens some doors for her.

    • booger says:

      I’d be way more concerned if her uncle in congress was landing her Nobel prizes or powerful political positions than stupid covers of dumb magazines that don’t mean anything.

      Nepotism isn’t going to go away any time soon, but unless it affects you directly or oppresses others, then who cares?

      • videli says:

        Sure, ’cause a little case of nepotism in society does not affect the general desire for meritocracy, and always has measurable effects. Yup.
        I’ve nothing particular against Uptown, she’s a pretty girl in a healthy cow kind of way, and I do find her preferable to the walking skeletons they use in high fashion. I find boobs that big scary and gross, but I’m sure most men, and women, would go nuts about them. But her face/eyes don’t photograph well, unless you want an illustration for ‘dumb blonde’. I saw her in a few videos, she actually has some spark in her. Too bad Baywatch is over.

      • Booger says:

        I’m not saying I endorse nepotism. I’m saying to save the indignation for issues that are more pressing, like nepotism reinforcing political corruption as opposed to some blonde using her connections to be on the cover of a stupid magazine. Do you really think Upton being in SI is helping plutocrats maintain autocracy?

      • videli says:

        You save your indignation for whatever you think it’s worth it. And BTW, it’s oligarchy, not autocracy.

      • booger says:

        Uh, no I meant autocracy. Why do you keep nitpicking at nonexistent issues with my comments? We’re on the same page abt Kate.

        To me, she’s just another model in the spotlight, and it confounds me how and why she instigates such vitriol. She’s not causing nuclear holocausts or preventing the cure for AIDS. You’d think she was given the criticism she receives, like the comment above.

        So yes, I think it’s fair for me to tell people who say ridiculously critical things about her to relax and demonstrate some perspective. So what if her “uncle in congress” is helping her get modelling gigs? If it is true, big bleeping deal.

    • Ericka says:

      How dare you judge anyone! Its very gross to read a lot of these comments. I wonder what your inner thoughts are like? Do you see a glass as half empty or half full? You shouldn’t judge yourself like that, let alone another!”Let he who is without sin cast the first stone”

      • minime says:

        ahah you’re funny. I love when people start with something like “how dare you to judge” when by its own that’s a judgmental behavior. You surely are invested in this thread..According to all of your theories that you spread in ur thousand posts here that surely says a lot about you (not in my opinion, but you say so, so I’ll take it as applying to your case…) “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”. Did you ever heard that? It has a reason to be. Not everyone agrees on the point of what is beautiful and what is not. In my opinion this girl has an average face and bobbies that would surely qualify for a breast reduction (what do I care if some men like it…I don’t). But she is surely a pretty girl. And for me it doesn’t have anything to do with weight or whatever. I find Sofia Vergara stunning and Adele gorgeous. Learn to cope with different opinions, when stated in a nice way!

  36. Agnes says:

    Did they really make her wear a bikini in Antarctica? Yikes.

  37. Asdfg says:

    I don’t see whats so great about Kate Upton.. Why is everyone obsessed with her?

    She has a nice bod but her face is meh… not sexy at all.. Cute face plus sexy body does not equal swim suit model material!

    • Ericka says:

      Do you hate on those that pass you by everyday? Do you judge others in every possible way? I often wonder how some of you ladies are as friends(can only imagine the thoughts you keep to yourself). I find it interesting how so many are angered that a regular looking person can be famous. What does that say about us? No matter what, it will never be good enough for most females. The problem isn’t her or the media, the problem is ppl’s lack of self control within themselves and they project it onto the world. No thank you!

      • Sachi says:

        Celebitchy is not the entire world. People commenting here don’t necessarily apply their opinions to their actual lives. Why is it always assumed that criticisms are made out of anger and jealousy?

        People not liking Kate’s body does not translate to, “I hate women and everyone is ugly!!!”

        These comments are just that: comments on the internet. We’re not here on Celebitchy to fight for women’s rights. That is something we do in real life, every single day.

        I doubt your own reasons for being here is to spread love and joy and “girl power” while you yourself are complaining and questioning other people’s characters through their comments. On the internet, of all places. We’re all nobodies here and nobody is making this topic personal except you. People are just voicing opinions.

        Kate Upton makes a living out of showing off her body. Don’t be offended when people react on how she is marketed and portrayed. The magazine’s aim is not to make Kate look intellectual nor is it their objective to empower women by putting a topless woman on their magazine cover as fodder for men’s fantasies and wet dreams.

        People will talk based on how Kate is presented to them. Show her topless and people will notice her breasts and body, positive feedback or not. You can’t expect others to talk about Kate’s personality and brains when she’s not being “sold” as such.

      • Ericka says:

        You’re trying to justify being judge mental and snarky. Its okay because you only do it on the internet, right? People wouldn’t feel the need to do that if they didn’t have some type of resentment in their lives. If you don’t think this way at work while you notice a coworkers outfit, or your sister in laws eyeliner, you wouldn’t feel the need to share negative opinions with like minded individuals. All I’m saying is, more self control to the types of thoughts one has is needed.

  38. Ramona Q. says:

    Victoria’s Secret and SI swimsuit issue make me very uncomfortable. It’s pr0n right out in the open and it’s completely normal. It makes me uncomfortable and pissed the same way the higher channels on the TV guide suddenly go from regular programs to Hot Wet Teen Lesbian Showers and much worse. Right in my face and somehow perfectly acceptable. It’s not right.

  39. coolio says:

    Curvy= most overused, rarely accurate adjective for womens bodies

    • Christina says:


      I’m so tired of the lazy application of the word ‘curvy’ to any woman who a) is larger than a (UK) size 10 and b) has big tits. Other than the latter, Kate is not especially curvy. And plenty of thin women are in fact curvy. It’s a body shape, not a body size.

  40. TheTruthHurts says:

    How cool that they are using plus size models for these covers now. We’ve certainly come a long way. She is is gorgeous!

  41. minnie says:

    I think she is a really cute girl, but her boobs look like two large, but slightly deflated whoopie cushions.

  42. paranormalgirl says:

    It’s always amusing to see that nothing brings out the cattiness more than a woman on the cover of a magazine.

  43. Irishae says:

    Some thoughts:

    - Beautiful women in bikinis featured in magazines for men to look at will always make some women uncomfortable.

    - Uncomfortable women will nitpick ANYTHING to make themselves feel better.

    - I can only imagine the comments about Elle, Tyra, or Kathy Ireland’s bodies at the time of their covers. Probably the same.

    - So many comments rife with pearl-clutching, yet Jane Fonda manifesto BS. How about we just make all these gorgeous women cover themselves up? Have any of you considered a move to somewhere in the Middle East? Some really great burqas over there, I hear.

    • bluhare says:

      Irishae: Since you have got off your soap box, let me get on mine. You do realize that all your sexual freedom came at a price, don’t you? That back before your generation, women had to quit work when they got pregnant, didn’t get promotions if they had children, had ads portraying them as their husbands’ slaves and the husband could take them over his knee if they didn’t do as they were told.

      I’m an old f*ck to you, so I’m sure my comments are meaningless. But my generation was the first generation to have birth control that worked. Yes, THE FIRST. I know one woman who did have a back alley abortion because there was no birth control and she got pregnant. My own mother got pregnant with me, and had to get married because the shame was so bad and the families made her. Luckily she and dad made it work and had a great marriage until he died last year.

      Back when I started working in ye olden days, at the office Christmas party my boss said I could come get my Christmas dinosaur but it was in the warehouse. Like the naive idiot I was, I followed him to get my pteradactyl. Well I had to fight the bastard off. Back then it was a cost of working. Today I’d sue the pants off him.

      So when we see stuff like this being stuffed down our throats as “empowering”, some of us don’t want to clutch our pearls. We want to puke and shake some sense into you.

      Thank you. End of my rant.

      • Christina says:


        And that wasn’t a rant at all. It was a salutory reminder that generations of women didn’t make sacrifices to afford others the ”choice” of being ”empowered” by getting their tits out for the lads.

      • Ericka says:

        Feel better? I hope so.

      • bluhare says:

        Thanks, Christina. I sure felt ranty writing it, although it was good to get it off my sagging wrinkly pathetic old chest.

      • Irishae says:

        I never said it was empowering. It is what it is…she is beautiful and featured in an issue obviously meant for men. Some people don’t like it and I personally find that odd.

        I certainly don’t know what sexual harassment and back alley abortions have anything to do with it or why you are so presumptuous about my age or knowledge of women’s history.

        Guess I just made the mistake thinking bitchiness and opinions weren’t patented around here. Thanks for the laughs all! :)

      • bluhare says:

        Irishae: My rant came about because of your pearl clutching burqa wearing comment for those who don’t like cheesecake. The “empowerment” comment was based on what pop artists (read: Beyonce, Rihanna et al) say about why they like to run around with skimpy outfits. It’s empowering for women, they say, and I wanted to point out what happened in the days of yore which sure as hell wasn’t empowering in the least.

        But you are correct. I did make an assumption about your age due to what you said. If I am wrong about that, I apologize.

      • Ericka says:

        Of course what I said, was said in a way to ruffle feathers. I was only trying to make a point. Everyone has an opinion and its great to be passionate, but it isn’t worth getting worked up over. Everything that was said was a valid point, but I don’t like to see blood pressures rising! I guess you could blame it on assuming someone’s context through text. Guilty as charged! I was being tongue and cheek when I said “smoke a j or get laid”. But, it proved my point! People tend to take everything personally, (I can do it too). I believe its a human flaw, but everyday we have the ability to work on ourselves. Life is hard, life is short, sometimes you need tunnel vision to just keep moving. The women on her are intelligent, thoughtful, and full of passion! If only we knew how to use it more productively. Alas, we all have our guilty pleasures..

      • bluhare says:

        Ericka: are you saying you commented as irishae? and intended to ruffle feathers? Well, mine were. That pearl clutching middle east burqa comment raised my blood pressure through the roof and might raise yours if you had been sexually assaulted at work, and had a man try to rape you on a date. That was all back in the days when no one believed you and “you asked for it”. So for everyone like you for whom it’s no big deal, there are people like me for whom it brings back some fairly unpleasant memories.

    • LAK says:

      Amen Bluhare.

      Some of us who grew up a generation after you salute and continue to salute women like you.

      As it happens I lived through the Elle/Tyra/Ireland covers, and they were nothing like the porno covers that one gets these days unless they were ON PLAYBOY magazine.

      We protested those covers as we do now. Shame your generation doesn’t get the difference and instead panders to men in the name of ‘empowerment’.

      • Christina says:

        Plus I don’t see much ‘cattiness’ here. If a woman (or man) becomes rich and famous 100% because of their body, then their body is fair game for commentary. Small price to pay for getting rich simply by posing for photos imho. In the case of Upton, we’re constantly being told how ‘refreshing’ she is, as though we should be eternally grateful that unique beauties like Linda Evangelista are supposedly being replaced by generic big-titted teenage fantasies like Kate. I’ll save my applause for something a tad more substantial than a glorified glamour model, thanks.

      • bluhare says:

        Thanks, LAK. Although it really is a drag getting old.

        (And I’m not THAT old, people!!)

      • Moore says:

        Men like women like her. She is kinda generic to me. But this is a mag for men and women who men find attractive. Not the women who women find attractive.

    • Ericka says:

      You must tread carefully or else some women will want to burn you at the stake!!! So many women are so self centered that they cannot except another’s opinion and feel like you’re personally attacking them(lol lol YES the world does revolve around YOU boo). Women who allow themselves to be walked in, whether it be in their family or work or friends, always, always have deep internal anger that comes out in odd ways(like through their mouths or fingers). Relax, ladies! Your opinion, just like mine…DOESN”T MATTER. Smoke a j or get laid. Everyone needs good relationships in their life, where they know how to put each other in their place, respectfully. Destroy the super EGO!!!!!

      • bluhare says:

        I do feel better after typing that, Ericka. Am I one of those women who are self centered? And I should smoke a joint or get laid? Been there, done that. Especially after I was sexually assaulted at work. Anything else?

      • LAK says:

        It’s a huge pressumption, not to mention projection, that the women on this board are somehow being held back by their personal lives and that it is anger driving their comments.

        Whatever happened to critical thinking instead of sweeping judgements based on fantasy?

      • Ange says:

        God we women ARE really just terrible aren’t we Ericka?

        Your internalised misogyny is showing.

      • bluhare says:

        Ericka: Did you actually read the comment to which I responded? The one where the poster said that women who think other women should cover up are pearl clutchers and should go to the middle east and wear burqas?

        I never said women should cover up. I said that the ability to stand there freezing your ass off in the name of entertainment is not “empowering”. And that a lot of women risked a lot so Kate Upton could do it.

        Perhaps you need to do a little self examination before you start calling everyone who expresses an opinion different than yours self centered.

        Pot. Kettle. Black.

  44. vvvoid says:

    I am all about the hour glass shape, I love women whose “curves” consist of that waist to hip ratio, particularly if they have big boobs and nice butts…this is why I don’t get Kate Upton. She has nice huge boobs but her body type isn’t the kind that supports extra weight well. Rihanna’s body looks fantastic to me, heavy or light, but Kate’s got no waist or hips so extra weight totally highlights her apple-shaped midsection. I don’t know if with this cover they photoshopped her the wrong way and made her midsection look more rectangular than it really is or what. She doesn’t look fat at all, she just looks…broad or something.
    Her boobs are real. I see no scintilla of a reason to think they are fake. Because they’re big? My mom is 5 foot even and weighs 90lbs and her boobs are around that big. Mine too but I’m 5’6” and 140.
    But also, Kate’s boobs have no tell tale implant ridge-line anywhere. This photo isn’t the best to judge off of, because they are pushed together and so round “they must be fake” looking. But for people to say her boobs are fake just makes me scoff, like it’s gotten to the extent where any not overweight female with large round breasts MUST have had a boob job.

  45. Snowpea says:

    Am I the only one who thinks she’s hot diggety?

    I LOVE her pudginess! I’m totally straight but she is suuuuuuuuper sexy.

  46. palermo says:

    Give me a break. We are here to dissect celebs. Kate is ONLY known for her body, so of course we are going to discuss it. If a woman is known for being a genius I am not going to talk about her looks whatsoever. I can’t stand when women call each other “haters” or jealous, it’s such bullshit. If I were young and gorgeous again and up for the cover of SI then maybe I would be jealous that she got it. Otherwise who cares.

    • booger says:

      Speak for yourself. Plenty of posters here engage in intelligent discourse without resorting to misogynistic slut shaming and virulent criticism of a 20 year old just because she makes money posing in bikinis. Good lord- she’s still a kid. You’d think she was the Antichrist or something the way some of you go on.

      And sorry, whether you intend it or not, but when people pick at the flaws at beautiful women it really does come across as jealousy. You don’t see people who are happy with their lives and self image being that critical. I also don’t give a crap if Kate is a model. I would never in a million years want anyone picking at my appearance the way people do to her, so I’m not going to behave that way.

  47. Patrice says:

    Wow, this is (almost) unprecidented so good for Kate! I love that she looks soft and curvy on this cover-even softer and more filled out than she did last year. I have a *somewhat* similar body type and I love that to see SI celebrating all kinds :)

    That said, it’d be very hard not to notice that all of the SI models have become alarmingly skinny over the years and buy horrible, hard, wonky looking bolt-ons all in the name of “curves” (as have those on the Victoria’s Secret catwalk); that just makes absolutely no sense to me. I have absolutely no problem with implants-just really bad ones (especially when these girls could afford the best out there).

    I suspect that there were some very not-so-happy phone calls made and conversations had when the “bigger girl” got the cover for the 2nd year in a row :D Looks like Kate’s getting the last laugh afterall…

  48. Sam x says:

    Its sad women on covers like SI, GQ, Victorias Secret etc sell themselves short as nothing but sex objects when they look more beautiful with clothes on. A woman can be sexy covered up, exuding confidence armed with intellect. The same with a man, he doesn’t have to take his shirt off to look sexy, he can still be sexy with clothes on have that confidence and intellect.

    • videli says:

      In a perfect world, I wouldn’t find anything wrong with sex object identifications, either self or onto others. But in the real world, where the gender relations are so imbalanced, seeing women as sex objects can have serious consequences when it comes to women’s self respect or even safety. But I’ll admit I’m no better than the guys who’ll obsess over Kate’s boobies. If I see a male underwear model, I find myself: drooling; not interested in the guy’s personality; not clamoring over having Zach Galifianakis in skivvies as representing the diversity of male beauty.

  49. Shannon says:

    Her face is pretty. That is all.

  50. Snowpea says:

    I’m shocked by all the peeps who keep banging on about how she’s not high fashion…

  51. sillyone says:

    I am not sure if this has been said so sorry if I am repeating here. I feel weird looking at her, her face makes her look like she is about 14 years old and it makes me feel creepy in a pervy kind of way.

  52. booger says:

    I promise that an article about Pol Pot, Bin Laden, Pinochet, Joseph Stalin, and Mussolini murdering puppies and feeding them to babies wouldn’t instigate as much outrage as one about Kate Upton being on the cover of a magazine in a bikini.

  53. Smaug says:

    I personally think this cover will lessen Upton’s chances of an American Vogue cover. This is not a good photo and she’s not a good model.

  54. Jag says:

    She’s beautiful, but this picture isn’t as good as it could have been. She looks like she’s trying not to chatter her teeth, which isn’t the best face to give. She must’ve been freezing on that boat.

  55. Fishlips says:

    She’s been my girl crush since her first SI cover. I saw her on a late night talk show, and I thought she was likeable. If those boobies are fake, the plastic surgeon did a good job.

  56. A. says:

    It’s so funny that all the bitchy girls are getting so ANGRY about Kate. They don’t like her boobs, her hair, her face, her ”midsection”, her body… but that girl is a fantasy to lots of men and she’s making money even though she’s not ”high fashion”. Get over yourself, ladies. You’re a TAD pathetic.

    • DeltaJuliet says:

      Absolutely. My husband has a major thing for her. I alternate between being annoyed and amused by it.

  57. Cletus says:

    Just so I have this straight: If I don’t like her picture and don’t happen to think that she is INCREDIBLY SEXXAY, I’m a jealous asshole? Um… why? I don’t actually know who the hell Kate Upton is supposed to be and I have never seen her magazine covers or whatever. I don’t follow her career. So all I am seeing is this girl inthe picture, and I don’t think she’s that gorgeous. I’m not picking apart her personailty, her character, her choice of professions, her politics, her religion, her stance on women’s issues- I’m just looking at a chick in a picture. I don’t FEEL any particular way about it. I just think she’s not that pretty. I have a friend named Nix who is a yoga teacher and I think Nix is way prettier. I’m just saying. So why do I get to be a jealous shithead because I don’t think THIS one is pretty? WTF is THAT?

    • DeltaJuliet says:

      Are you new here? Or to celebrity gossip in general? That is a typical trolls way of saying they don’t like the fact that you disagreee with their opinion. The best thing to do is disregard.

  58. Dani says:


  59. RobN says:

    A blond with big breasts. Very original. I kind of miss the years when they used to put somebody on the cover who had a really high level of fitness; at least it kept up the pretense of it being a sports magazine.

  60. ramie says:

    Her chest looks like a giant ass.

  61. mollination says:

    Damn…..It is impossible to win with women. Three years ago everyone was complaining about the unnatural aesthetic of rail thin women in mags and what it does to our psyches. NOW, THIS women is TOOO big??!?! What world do you live in where she’s out of shape??

    Maybe, just MAYBE someone is trying to harken back to the real standard of beauty men are biologically attracted to. The round, curvy HEALTHY aesthetic. Otherwise, they would have photshopped where her bikini string hits her hips. I actually think that’s one of the things going for her. Bah….I shouldn’t even bother. It’s just going to be a circular conversation anyway.

    This girl knows what she’s doing, and the legions seem to be following.

  62. Ashley says:

    Pretty sure the reason she doesn’t work out / lose weight is because she’ll lose her boobs. For some big-chested women that’s the first place they lose the weight.

    I like her body shape, love handles and all, and it seems most men do as well.

  63. paranormalgirl says:

    She’s fine. She’s a model, it’s what she does. I’m not going to judge a 20 year old model or pick her apart just because I personally don’t find cheesecake photo shots empowering. I think we should all be proud of our accomplishments, whether it be getting the SI cover two years in a row like Kate Upton, or making it through med school and becoming a psychiatrist like I did. We come in all shapes, sizes, colors, intellects, desires, dreams, hopes, talents, and abilities. But that’s just me, your mileage may vary.