The Benedict Cumberbatch Name Generator: the best or the worst thing ever?

A big part of Benedict Cumberbatch’s charm is the name “Benedict Cumberbatch”. When so many actors take on ridiculous stage names, it’s wonderful that Benedict Cumberbatch didn’t become Ben Thunder or Benny Danger or Carl Cockburn or B.C. Wilde. Benedict thought, “No, I’ll own this, my talent is enough to make my absurd name into a positive.” And it’s true. While no one would CHOOSE the name “Benedict Cumberbatch,” it’s made him stand out from the wide array of frankly interchangeable Chrises, Toms and Taylors. It also makes him so identifiably ENGLISH, which is a positive when you’re finding work all over the place, from Hollywood to British TV to the theater.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, you too can have a name like Benedict Cumberbatch. Some wonderful, brilliant Cumberbitch has made the “Benedict Cumberbatch Name Generator”. And it is my new favorite thing in the world. Some of the best names thus far? Bombadil Cankersore, Buttercup Cragglethatch, Beezlebub Gigglesnort, Rumblesack Clavichord, Boilerdang Concubine. This is genius. GO HERE to find your Cumbername.

Two more smaller Cumberbatch stories – one, you can see some new photos of Benedict and Martin Freeman filming Sherlock scenes here at the Mail. Two, you know how Benedict is going to be working on The Imitation Game shortly (probably as soon as he finishes Sherlock)? Well, Downton Abbey’s Allen Leech (the Irish driver turned widower) has joined the cast. Considering all of the sh-t Benedict has talked about Downton, it continues to be amusing how many times he’s cast opposite Downton actors. He worked with Dan Stevens in The Fifth Estate too!

Photos courtesy of WENN.

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113 Responses to “The Benedict Cumberbatch Name Generator: the best or the worst thing ever?”

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  1. Samigirl says:

    I present to you all…..

    Bonaparte Cameltoe.

  2. TheOriginalWaffle says:

    To be fair, Cumby really talks against Julian Fellowes, not the actors.

    • Anna says:

      The entire Brit acting community is so incestuous, any single stage/tv/film actor is a max 2 degrees of separation from any other actor. It would be impossible to avoid anyone you ever said sh*t about.

    • Ginger says:

      Fellowes is a family friend; Cumby has known him since he was a child.

      • Janey says:

        I think that’s anothere reason why people thought it was rude – you’re talking shit about a rival(ish) show and you’re friends with a lot of the cast and the creator – it was a fine example of bitchybatch.

      • Tish says:

        A lot of people talk shit about Fellowes. I remember Irons has said snottier remarks about Fellowes and his writng. And Cumberbatch actually sat with Fellowes when they were at the Globes. I’m sure it’s nothing in the end. I bet he hates Dan Stevens more. Haha!

        There were even subtle jabs from Stoppard himself when they were promoting PE. Haha. And both admitted that they’re friends.

      • Sixer says:

        The thing is, Fellowes is perfectly well aware of what he has created with Downton. He knows it’s camp. He knows it’s a soap opera. He knows it isn’t very good in terms of properly serious drama. But he doesn’t care. People consume it and enjoy it. It’s very successful. It’s made him a great deal of money. He’s big enough, bad enough, ugly enough and tongue-in-cheek enough not to mind criticism in the slightest. I doubt anything Benny the Bitch says would do more than amuse him. It wouldn’t spoil a friendship.

  3. Lindy79 says:

    I love that they’ve used his Dr. Seuss face from Star Trek on the site.

    I now have a name for my first born:
    Rinkydink Curdlesnoot

  4. Agnes says:

    I think the best one is Butawhiteboy Cantbekhan :D

  5. T.Fanty says:

    To be fair, he’s right about Downton Abbey.

    And I cannot wait to say goodbye to Sherlock hair. CUT IT OFF, CUMBY!!!

    All the genearated names sound like Roald Dahl characters.

  6. Claireb says:


  7. tizzyfizzy says:

    Yeah, but, aren’t like all of the Brit actors somehow connected? I keep hearing people say that the UK acting scene is pretty tight knit and everyone knows everyone… so, it stands to reason BC has probably already crossed paths with most (some?) of the Downton cast at one point or another- and my goodness, I hope they gave him crap. Seems like he can handle a good joke either way.

    Also: Tiddlywomp Cabbagepatch

  8. MeowuiRose says:

    He talked sh*t about Downton? What did he say!?!

    • Maureen says:

      That the show is ridiculous (I happen to agree, haha). I swear, I think he says some things as conversational asides and naively trusts that the interviewer won’t publish them. But of course they always do. That’s what they do, Benediiiiict.

      • MeowuiRose says:

        Oh…sadness. I enjoy it for the overly dramatic soap opera it is. It did start to wear a little thin on me towards the end of the last season.

      • Andrew says:

        Eh my thought with TV shows is just to let people who like them watch them. My sis loves downtown abbey (not obsessed) while personally don’t. I do respect that it’s well done and well made though. So everyone to their own with TV shows, unless it’s horrendous like Kris Jenners talk show or some attention shoring reality show that’s on only for cash grabs

      • Maureen says:

        @ Andrew

        I totally agree! I gave it try, not my cup of tea, but it’s got some great talent in it and some of my best friends love it. I’m more of a Walking Dead girl myself. But I want to see Benedict in Parade’s End. I can do Brit period drama!

  9. Maria says:

    Syphilis Cankersore


    but Wimbledon Tennismatch is a fine name for an english gentleman.

  10. Cahend says:

    Billiardball Chowderpants!?! I feel like that’s the code name Lindsay Lohan’s dealer uses for her…

  11. Chicagogurl says:

    Liverswort Wafflesmack

  12. Isabel says:

    Benadryl Claritin

    I sound like a drug. Maybe I should dress up as Blohan.

  13. drea says:

    Honkytonk Cumbercooch! Since he doesn’t want his fans calling themselves Cumberbitches (whatever, get off your high horse, Ben), maybe I can just call myself a Cumbercooch.

  14. Mia 4S says:

    Stand aside peasants for Lady Fragglerock Humperdink! :-)

    Oh and insanely excited for Sherlock, he was right about Downton, he should be more tactful, etc.

  15. Maureen says:

    I was sitting here a couple hours ago reading the blog and sipping my morning tea and LITERALLY wondered “Will we get a Benedict post today? We didn’t get one yesterday.” And here he is.

    That is all. :)

    Oh, but not all: Rinkydink Cottagecheese. I THINK I GOT THE BEST ONE!!!

  16. mia girl says:

    My name in the Queen’s Cumberbatchian is…

    Bumblebee Ballsacksnip

    Am I clearly meant to be a urologist who performs posh vasectomies.

  17. Allijo says:

    HA!! Honkytonk Upperclass.

    A walking class contradiction just like our beloved B.

  18. Nanea says:

    Brandenburg Clavichord.

    Which is funny, because I really like Bach’s Brandenburg Concertos. Other than the initials it’s not very cumberbitchy at all though.

  19. judyjudy says:

    Honkytonk Snugglesnatch.


  20. Julia says:

    Say goodbye to that sherlock hair ladies. It won’t surprise me if it’s gone by the very beginning of September *whimpers* This is the last week this show is filming. He will soon be shooting that Turing movie. I will miss the hair because we won’t see it for a longgggg time.

  21. CocoaPuffs says:

    Bandicoot Ballsacksnip…I think I found my pr0n name.

  22. icepop says:

    Although I think this story isn’t even worth blogging about, it is funny. But I’m kinda over the names people give this dude. He has a totally British name. Who cares. I’ve heard worst names. It’s like beating a dead horse.

  23. ds says:

    Burberry Upperclass! That sounds so over the top posh and snobbish I actually like it.

  24. greenmonster says:

    I sound like new Muppet: Bedlington Toodlesnoot. And therefore I love it!

  25. Tammy says:

    I thought he already cleared up the Downton Fiasco last year and set the record straight. Even Elizabeth McGovern had concerns about series 2.

    Anyway I do like the show but I do feel like it’s over recognized. I cannot tell you how many Brits I talk to who hate this show. I thought it was beloved the most in it’s own country. Then someone told me to think about the fact that the BAFTAs have never given it much love but the Emmys keep spoiling the show.

    • Sixer says:

      My mother would say, “It’s ITV, dear, what do you expect?” (Downton’s shown on what many people, including my mother, see as a lowbrow channel). That it gets Emmys is a source of much mockery.

      Seriously, it gets huge viewing figures but I think it must be a guilty pleasure for most. The only people I know who admit to watching it are old ladies.

  26. Adrien says:

    AS per Eddie Izzard, this is how Gerry Dorsey got his stagename.
    “Zingelbert Bembledack, Tringelbert Wangledack,… Engelbert Humptyback, … Engelbert Humperdinck, Benedict Cumberbatch,Vingelbert Wingledanck”.

  27. Lio says:

    Blubberwhale Crumplehorn! I nearly snorted coffee onto my keyboard, lol

  28. lady mary. says:

    good lord ,iam ehm ehm, HAIRYBALLS CUCKATOO,(thud !!!,crashes on the floor)

  29. Kimmie says:

    Ladies, don’t forget Englebert Humperdinck; he was there first!

  30. Felice says:

    It bothers me that people compare Parade’s End to DA. They’re entirely different shows besides being in the Edwardian era…

  31. Sal says:

    Hairycooch Cuttlefish

    :O O.o

    I tried another one. Bendydick Cottagecheese

    Bendy dick cottagecheese? :D

    This one is even ruder: Bendydick Creamsicle

    Oh, I love my bendydick creamsicles…… :D Just don’t like the salty ones.

  32. Naomi says:

    I waited all day to try this because I was absolutely certain the name chosen would suck. Henceforth I shall be hailed as:

    Biblical Concubine!

    That soooo doesn’t suck! Lol!!!!

  33. Susei says:

    Boilerdang Curdledmilk

    Bunsenburner Moldyspore


  34. LaurieH says:

    Signs That You’re Getting Old #73: you have no earthly idea who Benedict Cumberbatch is.

  35. CA says:

    My name turned out to be Biblical Concubine.

  36. Str8Shooter says:

    WHAT is this unbelievable obsession that you have with talking about this guy??

    I swear not a day goes by where there are not multiple postings on this fop-haired, homely guy who’s only claim to fame so far as I can tell is being in Dr. Who and a small part in the latest Star Trek.

    Please! Are there ANY other celebs you could post about for a change?

  37. Maria says:

    Snorkeldink Cumbercooch
    Oh dear, this one’s got a double meaning, me thinks!

  38. AH says:

    Wanda’s Crotchfruit.

    I think it would be better without the apostrophe (that makes no sense, right?) but I am definitely going to find use for the term ‘Crotchfruit’.

  39. Tish says:

    Britishguy Sillyname is still my favorite.

  40. Zgrom says:

    Wimbledon Clombyclomp here!
    ahaha how posh

  41. operagirl says:

    These are all too fun!

    I got Danglerack Scratchnsniff …

  42. raincoaster says:

    I’m Boobytrap Covergirl on that generator, so what’s not to love?

  43. Red says:

    so awesome. Benadryl Claritin