Martha Stewart loves Wolf of Wall Street, Pharrell and bathing before sex

Martha Stewart Book Signing
Martha Stewart did a reddit Ask Me Anything yesterday and it was awesome. She was pithy, funny and highly quotable. She was so to-the-point that I wish that she would have given more information in some of her responses, particularly her advice. (Although there’s plenty of that on her website and in her books.) Overall Martha’s AMA was one of the best I’ve seen. She really interacted with users and seemed to understand the format and rules of reddit. Here’s some of what she said:

Q: What are your top three rules for hosting?
Pay attention to your guests. 2. Interact with them. 3. Feed them fine food and wine.

On what she would do on a free day
Watch the entire 13 hours of a new season of House of Cards.

Q: Do you have any good sex tips?
Always take a bath before and after.

On doing it in the bath
That’s good too, and don’t forget to brush your teeth.

Q: Do you have a favorite singer or band?
Pharrell Williams. He’s so cute. I’ve actually seen him in person and adore his good humor.

Q: What’s your favorite parody of yourself?
There have been many. None of which are very accurate or flattering. But Ana Gasteyer on SNL did a good job.

Q: How did you feel about the South Park episode you were in?
I thought it was really cute!

Q: Why do you think Gwenyth Paltrow is a bad homemaker?
I have never said Gwenyth is a bad homemaker. In fact, I’ve never been invited to her home, so how would I know?

Q: Favourite Movie?
This year it was The Wolf of Wall Street.

Martha’s conspiracy theory about the Oscar’s selfie
Oh, by the way, a question of everyone: Do you really believe Ellen took that selfie with her Samsung? Seemed like a lot of people in one little picture from such a short distance!

Have you ever pissed off a friend by giving them unsolicited decorating advice while visiting their home?
I learned many years ago never to criticize, only compliment. Even if their home is horrifyingly awful.

[From Reddit]

I can’t include all of Martha’s answers of course, so I highly recommend you read it if you’re interested. Martha was friendly and chatty, writing that one guy’s dog reminded her of her first Chow Chow, and asking another user to send her a resume along with a picture of his daughter in her Martha Stewart costume. (Here it is!) She gamely answered questions about her prison stay, sayingThere was nothing remarkable about the food at all,” admitting that she had a prison nickname but that she can’t remember it, and adding “I don’t think about the past.” She also had a lot of kind words for people, wishing them and their families well.

As for the Gwyneth Paltrow beef, that was an excellent answer wasn’t it? To recap, Martha shaded Gwyneth twice last year, saying of Goop that “If she’s authentic, all the better. And I certainly hope she is,” she later brushed off comparisons to Gwyneth with a dismissive quip. “Lifestyle coach? Oh, for heaven’s sake, you have to have lived to be a coach.” So by just denying that she didn’t call Gwyneth a bad homemaker and wasn’t one to judge, Martha is not exactly saying that Gwyneth isn’t a bad homemaker. Martha can’t be bothered with Goop, but she’ll answer the question. Note that the person who asked the question misspelled Gwyneth’s name and then Martha repeated the same misspelling. She’s so unconcerned with Goop she doesn’t even know how to spell her name!

Martha, she’s just like us only classier, more organized, a better cook and better at throwing shade. Perfect bitch.

Header photo credit: Other photos thanks to Getty Images

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28 Responses to “Martha Stewart loves Wolf of Wall Street, Pharrell and bathing before sex”

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  1. Littles says:

    I want to see these two in the ring, duking it out. Martha would of course beat her. No contest. She would turn Goop into mulch, then spread it neatly under her perfect rose bushes, just in time for Spring :)

  2. Jaderu says:

    I wanna be Martha when I grow up. She always seems to not take herself too seriously. I still hold a grudge at her getting thrown in prison for doing what every other person on Wall Street does on a daily basis.

    • Mandy says:

      She didn’t even do what people on Wall Street do every day…basically, as far as I understood it, she went to jail for covering up something that wasn’t a crime in the first place! I still am unclear on how that is wrong…I don’t do bad things everyday and like it to appear as such! I share your outrage…and also want to be her when I grow up!

      • mercy says:

        I think she was charged with insider trading, which is definitely illegal but not any worse than some of the criminal shenanigans engaged in by certain sectors of the finance industry that helped tank the economy. Most of those criminals only received a slap on the wrist and fines, if they were cited at all. In somes cases, the laws on the books weren’t sufficient to charge them with any crimes because governments had stripped regulations from the books in previous years, or they weren’t able to keep to with the technolgical advances that made the fraudulent schemes possible.

      • Mandy says:

        @Mercy…It has been quite while but I seem to remember during the trial that while she was charged with insider trading she was not technically found guilty of it, only of obstructing the investigation which is what she went to jail for. I guess I could look it up and do some research, but I don’t feel like it. We all know Martha was wronged!

      • Lucrezia says:

        I can save you some research:

        My synopsis: CEO guy, knowing that the FDA had rejected their drug as a cancer treatment and thus knowing that the price was about to drop, tried to dump his stock. Broker guy knew CEO was trying to dump, but not why. Broker guy told Martha, who sold her shares, avoiding a loss.

        CEO guy was insider trading. Broker guy acted illegally, because you’re not allowed to tell client A what client B is doing. Martha should’ve immediately recognised that this was dodgy because she’d been a broker herself.

        If you think about it like receiving stolen goods: Martha was guilty of receiving something that common sense should’ve told her was stolen, but you can’t absolutely, 100%, prove that she knew. She tried to claim the broker hadn’t told her about the CEO dumping, and that she simply sold because she had a standing order to sell if the shares below $60.

        The broker’s assistant and her own assistant both testified against her, saying she knew, and that she’d even tried to change the phone records to hide it.

        Really, the gaol term is her own fault. If she’d played nice with the feds, she would’ve received the equivalent of a slap on the wrist. The fact she lied, and kept on lying even though they had evidence against her, drove them to make an example of her.

    • QQ says:

      Martha has such insouciance and shit.. i love her just cause she seem ultra chill and classy but fun times (but I love any woman that age that is willing and able to go on national tv essentially telling America she is only looking for a fkbuddy!)

  3. Nev says:

    bahahahahahahahahahahahhaahaha gangsta.

  4. eliza says:

    Martha will ALWAYS hold a special place in my heart. Love her.

  5. BendyWindy says:

    Ah, Martha. The Queen Bee of lifestyle. Gwyneth ain’t got nuthin’ on Martha.

    Also, how did I KNOW Martha would be a House of Cards fan?

  6. Frank says:

    I loved her AMA yesterday, I love how she was so very Martha but didn’t shy away from questions about prison and other untoward topics. She was even pretty gracious when some guy said he was her former neighbor and was unimpressed with the cookies she handed out at Halloween, haha.

  7. j.eyre says:

    If Martha Stewart and Anna Wintour ever merge forces, I want to join that army.

  8. Hautie says:

    I still firmly believe the only reason the public is being bombarded with Gwyneth… is because her husband cut off her cash flow. From his own wallet that is….

    So in order for her to fund her ridiculous pretentious life style… Gwyneth has attempted to usurp Martha Stewart’s. And failed. Miss Stewart has spent decades dedicated to her brand. Even if we all know Martha is a complete pill to deal with, she worked extremely hard for what she built.

    Gwyneth hired a new PR firm and manager and said… I want to be the next Martha Stewart. MAKE IT HAPPEN. So here we are… since her big dollar acting days are over. She needs to hustle and find a new game.

    I image, nothing makes ole Goop Girl more thrilled, than thinking the little people…. want to be like her. Simply cause she is so perfect. With that tragic burnt up, over processed hair do.

  9. Yeller says:

    That AMA was amazing. You missed her shout out to Snoop and her super responses to all the guys who thought she was hot.

  10. Virgilia Coriolanus says:

    Martha is the HBIC, and she knows it!

    I really like Martha–don’t care if she is a biatch. It was a long time ago, but I saw this Lifetime movie about her life–all I remember was the beginning of it. But she grew up beyond poor–like the kids had to help their dad with his work (he made root beer apparently), and she basically started from NOTHING. Excellent example for young women, imo.

  11. derpshooter says:

    Glad to see you guys are enjoying all the newly free Getty Images! I knew they were including the photog info in them, I didn’t realize it would be so big though. Looks kind of weird. :) Anyway, I hope y’all and everyone else just go crazy the next little while and give us ridiculous amounts of embedded pics in every post!

  12. Tiffany :) says:

    Of course she loved Wolf of Wall Street, she benefited from the luxury of Club Fed too.

    I find it kind of gross that she would say it out loud. Insider trading and fraudulent activity does create victims! In Wolf of Wall Street they are taking low income peoples’ savings and selling them crap. It is gross that after living through something similar, she’d be entertained by watching that.

    • Lucrezia says:

      Do you think she was giving a straightforward answer there? If it was honest, then yikes … she didn’t learn a thing. But if she was joking, then I get it. If you read it as biting, self-directed sarcasm, then it’s fine. (Not something she should say on a morning TV show or anything, but fine for a reddit AMA, where borderline jokes are acceptable.)

  13. Allie says:

    I love Martha! I even named one of my cats after her. Lol

  14. mercy says:

    Gwyneth should ask Martha who does her colour. GOOP’s brassy yellow shade is very unflattering. At least she finally ditched the center part.

  15. Summer says:

    Can’t help loving Martha Stewart!