Sarah Hyland’s restraining order reveals ex threatened to kill her, commit suicide

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Yesterday we heard that Modern Family actress Sarah Hyland, 23, had obtained a temporary restraining order on Friday against Matthew Prokop, 24, a former live-in boyfriend of five years. Prokop was due to be released from rehab, and the rehab director had advised Hyland to take out a restraining order before Prokop left the facility. At that point all we knew about the restraining order were second hand details from TMZ, and they were disturbing. Prokop had allegedly verbally abused Hyland for four out of the five years that they were together. TMZ revealed that Prokop had choked Hyland earlier this year, damaging her voice and leaving her with a sore throat. When Hyland attempted to break up with Prokop, he ranted and screamed. He did this in front of witnesses including Hyland’s co-star Julie Bowen, who had come to lend support.

Now the full restraining order has been released. Reading it makes my heart sink and a lump form in my throat. I can only imagine when Hyland went through the past few years. The sad highlights include a cycle of abuse that Hyland endured for years, and a detailed account of manipulative threats by Prokop. Prokop threatened to commit suicide if Hyland left him. When Hyland attempted to contact Prokop’s mother, his mother told Hyland that it would be her fault if Prokop killed himself. Some passages from the restraining order are below. Trigger warning – many descriptions are disturbing.

Cycle of abuse
Over the course of the relationship between 2010-2014, Mr. Prokop habitually verbally abused me, called me vile names and degraded me in public. Frankly, I am a little embarrassed to even state here the kinds of foul names Mr. Prokop repeatedly called me; however, they included such names as” “c-“, “w-“, “s-” and many others. Over that time, he also repeatedly exhibited significant anger management issues which included things like throwing objects in my direction in anger, pushing me, punching walls and slamming doors. He would make vague threats saying that he would “never hit a woman, but [that I] deserve” to be beaten or that he “would beat the s- out of [me]”. I was often scared and confused and didn’t quite know what to do and he would apologize and beg forgiveness, so I stayed.

He choked her
On or about May of 2014, Mr. Prokop and I had an argument in the garage of my home wherein he was critical of an outfit that I was wearing. He began calling me vile names including shouting “[redacted]” at me over and over again. I asked him to stop and finally I approached him and demanded that he stop. Mr. Prokop grabbed me by the shoulders and slammed my back into the side of my car. It bears note that I have a history of medical problems stemming from a kidney disorder about which Mr. Prokop was aware when he slammed me into the vehicle.

Mr. Prokop pinned me against the car and though I struggled to get free, I could not. He is 5’11” tall. I am about 5’2″. Mr. Prokop outweighs me by over 50 pounds. Once he had me pinned against the car he placed both of his hands around my throat and began to choke me. His grip was so tight I could not breathe or speak. I was scared and infear for my life. I struggled to get free and continued gasping for breath, but he would not let go. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, I kicked him in the leg and he let go and went into the house. I was extremely scared and confused and did not know what to do. I was going to call the police, but he apologize, swore it would never happen again and begged me not to call the police, so I did not. I did suffer injuries to my voice and a very sore throat following this event.

She tried to break up with him but he threatened her
Over the course of the next few months, I tried to end the relationship several times without igniting his temper, but I could not get him to leave and he would apologize and ask for another chance.

On or about August 4, 2014, after more public name calling, emotionally abusive behavior and exhibitions of his temper, I tried again to break up with him and asked him to leave. He began slamming doors and throwing objects including his phone in my direction. I was in fear for my safety. He began texting me non-stop while I was working and verbally threatening me. I was extremely scared, so I baked away from the breakup.

His mother threatened her too
Then, on or about August 11, 2014, he again started calling me names saying that I was “s- looking” and calling me “c-“. We had an argument at that point and he again began punching walls and slamming doors in my home. So, I called his mother and advised her that I was breaking up with him and I requested that she come to California to help me get him help. She initially said that she would come in a couple of days, but two days later, on August 13, 2014, she sent me a text stating that if I broke up with him, he would kill himself, that it would be my fault and that she was not coming. I let her know that I was scared for my personal safety and had reached the point where I could not take it anymore and that I was going to end the relationship whether she came or not.

She tried to break up with him with the help of some colleagues
I had asked some colleagues (Julie Bowen, Erica Wright and Mr. Konigsberg), who also know Mr. Prokop to come to my house on Saturday to intervene and help me peacefully end the relationship. I even had purchased a plane ticket to give to Mr. Prokop at this meeting for him to travel home to Texas the next day to be with his family. On Saturday August 16, 2014, I was present at my home with [colleagues] for our planned meeting… However, when Mr. Prokop arrived at the house for the meeting and saw my colleagues, he ran outside into the backyard and began screaming. I followed him and told him that he scared me and that I could not take it anymore. Mr. Prokop threw a lighter at me. Ms. Bowen spoke with him and then advised me to leave immediately, implying that it might not be safe for me to stay. She said that Mr. Prokop made a comment to the effect that I needed to suffer as much as he had and that he wanted to make me so miserable that I would take a shotgun and kill myself. I left the property because he refused to leave and I stayed with a friend that night.

Prokop threatened to burn down her house and harm her dog
Later that day, in the evening of Saturday, August 16, 2014, Mr. Prokop texted me from outside of another house I own that is undergoing construction and said he was there to pick up his belongings. He said that if I did not come to that house within 10 minutes he would drive through the garage door to get inside and set the house on fire. He also threatened that if I did not comply, I would never see my dog again.

He threatened suicide
The rest of Saturday and all day and night Sunday… he relentlessly bombarded me with vile, threatening and emotionally disturbing texts and voice mails including his own suicide threats… over those two days… he also told my colleague, Ms. Wright, more than once that I deserve to die. Ms. Wright also informed me that he made numerous menacing statements to her directly about me and my dog. I was very frightened and upset and sought some counseling to help deal with the situation. Also installed new alarm systems and changed my gate code…

Prokop deleted all his threatening texts to her
The next day, on Sunday morning, I went to the rental house where we lived to say goodbye to Mr. Prokop and to make sure he was going back to Texas… Erica Wright was there as well. While I was there, I received a message on my phone and accessed my phone to see the message. At that point, Mr. Prokop grabbed my phone from me and deleted all of his texts to me. I tried to get my phone back, but he kept it away from me until he had completed deleting the messages…

The rehab director told her to get the restraining order
On August 18, 2014, he formally moved out of my house and directly into the rehabilitation facility where he has been since. I had hoped that the rehabilitation program would help him, but as mentioned above, I received word from the director of the facility… that Mr. Prokop is set to be discharged on Sunday, September 21… and that I should seek this order immediately due to Mr. Prokop’s mental state and attitude toward me.

[From restraining order as posted on NY Daily News]

I’m sorry that’s so long, I didn’t know what to cut out because it was all so powerful and I wanted you to be able to read it in context. At least this case is getting publicity for the sake of victims everywhere. I hope this isn’t a blow to Hyland’s privacy, I hope she’s not mortified that this got out, but she has absolutely no reason to be embarrassed. So many women have been in her situation, and I hope this case helps victims realize that they are not alone, that they have nothing to be ashamed about and that they can escape from their abusers. If you suspect you are in an abusive relationship, please get help. (You can use an incognito window in most web browsers to ensure that your surfing history is not traceable.)




Photos are from 2013 and 2014, except for the event photo with the Elle backdrop, that’s from 2010. Credit: and PRPhotos

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134 Responses to “Sarah Hyland’s restraining order reveals ex threatened to kill her, commit suicide”

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  1. Kiddo says:

    I don’t know what to say, how terrible. And worse yet that his mother put all this on her to keep him from committing suicide.

    He looks totally tweeked-out in that top photo.

    • Kiddo says:

      Adding: This gives me enormous respect for Julie Bowen.

      • FLORC says:


        Read the whole thing.I really should have taken the warning more seriously. At least this being talked about again will help others, hopefully.

    • Erinn says:

      I agree with both of these sentiments.

      I hope that his mother feels like absolute shit now that this is out. What a sorry excuse for a human being. Clearly, she had no objections to the possibility that he’d murder Sarah, but the fact that he might kill himself – oh not her baby.

      • Esmom says:

        I know. And yet she wasn’t even all that concerned for him if she couldn’t be bothered to be by his side. I said below that her attitude could be an indicator of where his issues come from.

      • Tapioca says:

        Just to play Devil’s Advocate for a moment, but she’s his MOTHER. She heard and believes his side of the story, which I seriously doubt included that he’d been physically and emotionally abusing his girlfriend, and fears her child is suicidal. Her reaction can’t be judged from an outsider’s perspective.

        Of course her actions are despicable in the cold light of day, but I would rather parents defend their kids beyond the point of reason, rather than not giving a shit, as so many do.

        Let’s focus our ire on the REAL villain here.

      • Erinn says:

        That’s fair Tapioca – but where was she when she feared her son was suicidal? I understand the only hearing his side bit, but either way – she should have showed up to try and help HIM while saying she wasn’t helping Sarah break up with him.

        There’s too much of the “Not MY baby” scenario, just as the “meh, whatever” parenting scenario out there. Your baby is an adult. No mother of a serial killer raised them to be a serial killer. Some things are out of your control, and you have to realize that no matter how much you love your kid – they COULD be capable of terrible things just as much as the next person.

      • Nicolette says:

        I’m convinced there are some moms out there who if they saw their precious angels standing over a body, covered in blood, weapon in hand AND a video tape exists of the crime they will still say “Not my son! He would never do that, he’s innocent.” Denial, denial, denial.

      • Embee says:

        Guaranteed the crap mother assumes the victim position and asserts that mean old Sara with all her wealth and connections “did this” to her son. She’ll probably sue. And she will never, ever require him to assume responsibility for his actions.

        Tapioca I think our culture actually leans really far in the other direction, to defending their child notwithstanding the facts, The “not my kid” epidemic.

      • Esmom says:

        Nicolette, ITA. I had a boyfriend in college who deceived his mom about so many things and all she ever did was blame me for being a bad influence, when in reality I was the only one keeping him afloat at school. There was no reasoning with her.

        And yet, cuckoo as she was, I think if she ever had an inkling he was suicidal, she would intervene…unlike Prokop’s mom, who it seems couldn’t even be bothered when that possibility was brought to her attention.

      • Kiddo says:

        @Tapioca, you are right. It may not be her fault but she made damn sure it wasn’t her problem either.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        No matter what her justifications, it is horrible that she showed no concern for Sarah or her own son, especially after being informed that he was suicidal. It seems she accepted that as fact, because of her reply.

      • attackofthekb says:

        I feel no pity for the mom and doubt she gave a crap about Sarah. We had a mom where I am from who protected her son after he killed his girlfriend. She knew he was holding his half dead girlfriend in their house and she tried to make sure her baby was not found out. It’s sick. Google George Bell and Heather Spencer Jackson, MS. It is a sick sick story.

      • Erinn says:

        attackofthekb — what a ridiculous farce. Reading the news articles made me so mad.

      • Pepsi Presents...Coke says:

        She reminds me of Andrew Luster’s mother. He raped over 70 women, a bunch came forward, but no, they were all lying and her son was just popular with ladies. When he ran away to Mexico rather than face charges he was being persecuted. When there was a bunch of video evidence proving that he was drugging these women and raping them while they were unconscious presented in court he was being set up, or someone was fooling around with cameras, or someone was trying to defraud him out of his Max Factor inheritance, or the women were pretending to sleep because maybe that was just his fetish. Disgusting.

      • delorb says:

        One lady was actually shot by her son, (who had just shot and killed his father), point blank in the face. When paramedics arrived, they asked her who did this and she said, ‘my son’. After the surgery to save her life but before all the reconstructive surgeries to repair her face, she told police that she didn’t know who it was. They recalled her dying declaration that it was her son, but she denied it over and over. Even during the trial. She’s probably still denying it while he rots in jail.

        From the article, I’m wondering what he said in rehab that scared the director? Its all privileged information, but it must have been so out there and filled with rage that it caused him to act.

        My hope is that she doesn’t fall for the ‘let me see you one last time before I head by to Texas’ line. Most women don’t survive that last time.

      • Jennifer says:

        I doubt his mother feels like sh*t that it got out. She won’t be embarrassed. My guess is that she’ll be mad because now she’s been exposed as the jerk she really is, but she won’t be embarrassed like a normal human would be. On the day I went to court to get my restraining order against my (now) ex-husband his mother stood and shouted, “He should have hit her harder!” over and over again. She yelled that throughout the entire courthouse and even once she got into the parking lot.

        I want to sincerely wish this young lady well. The first step is realizing that you *can* leave. This will stick with her forever but it will (hopefully) make her a stronger person. My guess is that she will go through numerous emotions and she may even feel worthless for a while (I did, anyway) but that will all change with time. Once those feelings go away she will feel like she owns herself again and that she can conquer anything. And to Julie Bowen: You are an amazing woman and an amazing friend. I am so very glad she has someone like you. I have my own ‘Julie Bowen’ in my life and she helped me through every step of the way in my own ordeal and she never once judged me.

        Now I’m all teary….ugh

      • K says:

        Tapioca, no matter what he told his mother, his girlfriend told her she wanted the relationship over, and the mom said the relationship had to endure or the girlfriend would be responsible for his suicide. There’s no way that’s anything but disgusting on the part of a parent. Your child’s partner has the right to leave, and to threaten your child’s suicide to make them stay, let alone arguing that it would be that partner’s fault if they did it, is a terrible thing to do. There’s no lie your kid could ever spin that would justify it. A parent who can do that is a shitty one, and a shitty person, too. Even without the physical abuse being believed and/or known about, it’s still bad.

        It’s true that a lot of abusers have themselves been abused or witnessed abuse. But unfortunately, a lot of abusers are simply monstrously entitled. And very sadly, a lot of the time that monstrous entitlement was created and fed and compounded by how they were parented. You’d be amazed at how many mothers try to bully and manipulate victims into staying, forgiving and then allowing endless access to (also abused) children. It’s so common, it’s a recognised pattern. Some abusers are victims of abuse. Others were just spoilt rotten and never, not once, raised to see other people as having rights or needs of their own.

      • attackofthekb says:

        Yeah. Imagine those of us who knew her and what a sweet kind and forgiving person she was. JPD is a joke. I am so tired of these kinds of stories. Woman are consistently victimized and made to feel crazy if they have the audacity to confront the issue. I know I have been made to feel crazy when my abusive ex would choke me and mentally abuse me and forced me into prostitution. I was the bad guy and the b*tch for daring to stand up for myself. 11 years later and I am more of a mess now mentally than I was then. I’ve never gotten over the abuse. It’s painful and takes away your dignity and confidence. I hate myself more and more everyday. It’s painful. The worst thing is that I didn’t even go through what some of these women have endured. I guess I am weak. But it’s just so hard day to day.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        attackofthekb, first and foremost: HUGS to you. You are not weak. The fact that you went through something like that and made it through shows that you are incredibly strong. You aren’t a mess because you are dealing with crimes that were committed against you. You are a human being, and it is completely understandable that such trauma would have an effect on you.

        Please do not hate yourself. Please know that your value to this world has not lessened because of what you have experienced. If I knew what area of the world you lived in, I would research sources that could help you work through this.

        If anyone knows of resources that could benefit this situation, please offer them. Thank you.

      • attackofthekb says:

        Tiffany: Thanks. I appreciate that. I once handled it all better but so much has happened since then that it’s made me think I have no worth. I was raped three times by friends and boyfriends. I have lost everything from a lay off. I just feel like maybe I deserve this kind of life. So I’ve succumbed to it. I have tried to look for resources such as a low cost therapy center but they alternate therapists so often that I constantly had to start over with my story. Anti depressants only work enough to make me not as suicidal. Now I just wish a truck would hit me instead of actually wanting to do something to myself. The only thing in this world keeping me here is my son. I can’t abandon him but I feel like my depression is just as harmful. I live in Jackson, MS though. I also don’t qualify for much because I don’t receive child support. In my opinion the system is flawed. Those who need mental healthcare are ignored if they are poor. I am definitely poor. Anyway, thanks for the uplifting words. I needed them.

    • AntiSocialButterfly says:

      His mother’s distancing and blaming certainly suggests his behavior has been explosive and problematic for quite some time. It is as if the mother is relieved that he had found a new focus (SH, no longer the mother) for his anger, but doesn’t want him to hurt himself, despite what she may have experienced with him. She knows the extent of his violence as a result of her own history with him, but doesn’t want to revisit it by having him come home, happy to have SH as her proxy, if you will.

      • Kiddo says:

        Still crappy as hell. No empathy put forth. Not enough for her son or Sarah.

      • AntiSocialButterfly says:

        Oh, Kiddo, I agree. I was trying to illustrate how awful it is that she allows SH to be his ragdoll now, and that she is free, and making excuses/ displacing agency for his behavior. It is very, very sick behavior on her part.

      • Cheryl says:

        Maybe there’s a background of alcohol dependency in his family. The details of the dynamics remind me very heavily of moms and sons I have been in contact with where the mom is an alcoholic. (And the son adds drugs to the mix). A potent combination of delusional, cowardly, excuse-making passive then violent emotional blackmail type behaviours.
        Anyhow, if I ever get such a request from my son’s girlfriend, you can count on me to show up and support my son AND his girlfriend.
        So glad, she stepped up and away from this downward spiral.

      • StormsMama says:


        As an aside: I’ve never seen Modern Family but I feel like I remember reading about this girl last year— isn’t she living with her older sister? And her own mother is abusive? Thoughts? Anyone? Brueller?

      • andrea says:

        This reply is for STORMSMAMA

        I think that was the other girl.

    • Sayrah says:

      Good god. His mother sounds exactly like my ex’s mother. Please be careful and strong Sarah.

    • Sarah says:

      Hmm wonder where he learned to manipulate?
      She’s actually safer now that the world knows he’s her abuser. He can’t hide behind anonymity anymore

      • Ange says:

        I agree. My abusive ex had been told all his life he was the special boy and could do no wrong. He always ran home to mum when he wrecked his life yet again. We’d have arguments and he’d tell her all about it, then she’d call me to tell me how wrong I was and how wonderful her son is. Her wonderful son, mind you, who was hitting walls and verbally and emotionally abusing me. Yeah, you can see where they get it from.

  2. Brin says:

    That is so awful, I’m glad she got away from him.

  3. AG-UK says:

    God what a nightmare. Bullying abusive a..hole.. His mother no joy either.

  4. tanesha86 says:

    Omg I’m tearing up just reading this. My dad abused my mom when I was a child. I remember times when he would drag her through the house with me hanging on. In any case I’m so happy she got out

    • Renee says:

      I am so sorry. I am glad that both you and your mother survived that.

    • Ag says:

      it sounds trite, but i am really sorry to hear that. no woman, and no child, should have to go through that. it must have been a nightmare.

    • michelle says:

      I’m so sorry you had to go through that and that you and your mom are out of the situation. It’s a terrible thing to witness and to be a victim of such abuse, especially at such a young age.

    • AntiSocialButterfly says:

      I’m so sorry, Tanesha, and I understand. I remember laying in the dark at the top of the stairs at night waiting for my dad to start on my mom for a long time after I called the state troopers on him. Luckily that was the end of the physical stuff. Those memories do hurt, but less so with time. If you have PTSD from it (i know i did), seek some help. It is worth your time. All the best to you.

    • Nicolette says:

      Simply horrific for a child to witness, and my heart breaks that you had to witness it and that your mom had to endure it. My best wishes to you both and hopefully he is out of both of your lives.

  5. jesb says:

    Wow that was difficult to read. I do hope Sarah is getting counseling too and really does appreciate the value of her story getting out. Unfortunately this is an all too common experience for women of all ages, but a growing concern for these young adults. Stay strong Sarah

  6. Sel says:

    How horrifying for Hyland. I’m glad she got away from that relationship. I hope Prokop gets more help. If the rehab director advised her to get the restraining order, obviously he still has many issues. I really hope she’s not embarrassed or ashamed. She has no reason to feel either way. This was not her fault.

  7. Renee says:

    This breaks my heart.

  8. Rhiley says:

    I just hope she realizes she is a beautiful, talented young woman who is very capable of having a long and creative life. I hope that she can find someone who will treat her the way she deserves to be treated, and I hope this prick finally does the right thing, and moves on. Quit is threats, takes the plane ticket, and gets the away from her. What a freaking nightmare.

    • Happy21 says:

      I totally agree. I hope she takes this and makes a better life for herself and seriously thinks about helping other young girls in her situation. She can do so much good with this terrible thing that she has endured.

      She needs to hold her head high, not be embarrassed and stay on the straight and narrow. She could go down the wrong path because of this and the verbal abuse she suffered. I really hope she is okay. Poor thing.

  9. Chris says:

    I hope she’s through the worst of it.

  10. Loopy says:

    Yeah this young man sounds extremely dangerous and unbalanced, and the Mother should really step in to help her son,he is clearly not well.

    • prettylights says:

      I agree, he sounds straight up crazy. I am glad she is getting away from him and truly hope he leaves her alone. This kind of thing scares me and if any silver lining can come of this awful situation, it might be that Sarah is helping spread the word that this can happen to anyone.

      There was just a murder-suicide where I grew up and the woman involved was a very sweet co-worker of my Mom’s. She left her abusive husband over a year ago and had to leave town in order to get away. She returned recently and was getting her life back together – trying to live life fully every day, starting to date and trust men again, ect. He showed up to her house one Friday night, killed her and then himself – “If I can’t have you, no one can”. So so sad. This guy sounds like he would be one to do something like that judging from the past treatment of her and threats, but I really hope I am wrong and he gets some help.

  11. Rhiley says:

    Has anything been mentioned about how she me this guy in the first place. Not that it matters really, but he seems like such a bum and she really seems to have her financial affairs in order.

  12. AlmondJoy says:

    This is just awful. So hearbreaking. That young man needs HELP. I also pray that Sarah gets the help she needs, after going through such abuse for so long. And his mother!! I know that situation made Sarah feel even more helpless. I’m just so sad about this.

    • Esmom says:

      I know, the mother. I can’t imagine how helpless Sarah must have felt at getting a response like that. If she can’t bother be there for her son in such a dire crisis it kinda shows where some of his issues may have developed.

      • AlmondJoy says:

        Esmom, same thing I was thinking. I can only imagine hard it was to even go to his mom dor help, and then to receive that response? Just so sad.

      • lucy2 says:

        Absolutely. You can clearly see why he has such bad issues, the mother is a horrible person, but she too was probably raised in a terrible environment.

        It sounds like this guy is very mentally unstable, I hope rehab helped some but that he continues to get help, and most importantly that he leaves Sarah alone. I can’t imagine how scared she is, but at least she can afford to hire security and change her living situation, and it sounds like she has a lot of support.

  13. als says:

    This is heartbreaking. I can only imagine how dangerous he is if Sarah was advised to get the warrant by the rehab facility’s manager.
    I don’t know if this is the right thing to mention here, but a person with this kind of rage, displayed for such a long time, can in no way be rehabilitated in a little over a month, maybe a lifetime if he is lucky, but definitely not a month.
    Again, I don’t know who put him there and what was their expectations, maybe it was a trick to get Sarah back, but a month is just too short for such behavior.

    • Esmom says:

      Yes I was wondering why he was even being released when he clearly hasn’t come close to getting a grip on his rage. He sounds more unstable than I had gathered yesterday. The fact that his mom won’t step in and is trying to put this all on Sarah is beyond the pale. I hope she can begin healing in peace and far away from this guy.

      • AntiSocialButterfly says:

        It was probably a substance abuse rehab, rather than behavioral, don’t you think? I completely agree that 30 days is not enough to address his emotional & behavioral issues, but I think sometimes substance rehab ( depending on the user’s state of dependence) can be shorter.

      • Esmom says:

        ASB, maybe, it’s interesting that there are no specifics on that. But still the two issues aren’t unrelated, so you’d think if someone is exhibiting dangerous behavior when it’s time to be released, they’d try to find another placement for him. I’m sure I’m oversimplifying but it seems like he should not be on the streets, regardless of why he went to rehab in the first place.

    • michelle says:

      I was thinking the same thing. A month is in no way enough time. He has serious issues that will take years, if ever, to rehab.

      His behaviors remind me very much of my own father’s behavior towards my mother and myself and siblings. He is an emotionally and physically abusive alcoholic and would use threats of his own suicide to keep my mother from leaving him. It was excruciating as my mother’s father committed suicide and my father played upon that. He would push us all around and if we tried to help my mother, he would turn on us (as children) viciously. He once held me against the wall by my neck, choking me.

      It’s been years now and my mother finally left and we are all grown now. Yet, my father is not rehabilitated – though he has been in and out of rehab. Partly because his parents (my grandparents) never held him responsible for any actions. They faulted my mom and their grandchildren for my dad’s behavior – we must have done something, triggered something in him, etc., as if anything justified his behavior. And yes, when he threatened suicide, they always said that it would be our fault if he did it and flatly refused to help us (even their grandchildren) in any way.

      Sorry for the rant. I just feel for her, so much. I hope that she has a great support system and it sounds as if she has great friends there for her. Poor girl. At the very least, I am glad that people seem to be addressing the issue of domestic violence more in the media. Hope she stays safe.

      • Esmom says:

        Oh my goodness Michelle your story brings tears to my eyes. No child should have to go through what you did. I’m glad you are here to tell the tale, horrifying as it is. Wishing you peace.

      • AntiSocialButterfly says:

        Oh, god Michelle. I am so sorry. My situation wasn’t quite to the same degree, but the lack of accountability on the part of others was. It is truly a feeling of utter helplessness and hopelessness for a child. I mentioned upthread that witnessing dv can be a catalyst for PTSD, worth looking into if you feel you are reliving it or avoiding things/places that trigger memories. It’s so good to clean house. All my best, and ((hugs)) to you.

    • decorative item says:

      Agreed, this is very serious. I hate to say it, but she will need to look over her shoulder for a very long time. Poor woman.

    • Ennie says:

      He needs years of therapy and him doing his part in his “homework’s”. Maybe at least, at least 2 years.
      If he is an actor, he will probably be back in Cali… that alone is worrying.

  14. enya says:

    SORRY that the post is long? Long posts are the reason I choose this site. Others give me gossip whiplash.

    • Serenity says:

      I know right? I love this site because it has such long and thoughtful articles on whatever celeb gossip is going on. And if it’s light-hearted stuff, no one can beat Kaiser for humour. This site absolutely rocks.

  15. Ag says:

    heartbreaking. i hope that he keeps away from her, and she continues to have the support of those close to her, as she will need it prob for years to come.

  16. Marianne says:

    Hopefully this will empower other women to leave their abusive boyfriends/husbands/fiances.

  17. birdie says:

    I’m shocked by his mother’s reaction.

  18. kaligula says:

    …JUST KILL YOUR*SELF* –Carlos Mencia

    Anyone seen that routine by him? It’s good.

  19. Peppa says:

    This has definitely brought up some bad memories because I went through a similar situation, I feel for her and hope she is ok. Maybe having this be so public will keep him away from her. My ex repeatedly violated the restraining order I had against him, including showing up to my work and school. Unfortunately in those situations people will blame you, saying it is your problem he is doing that and you should be able to keep this under control. I’m glad to hear she has Julie Bowen in her corner for support.
    I can also relate to the mother thing. My ex’s mom was the worst. After he was arrested for assault, she said it was my fault because I should have just gotten in my car and left instead of making something out of it. That is because after he punched me and head butted me, he crawled into bed and fell asleep. Problem is, I ran to a neighbor’s apartment for help and had no idea what he was doing. The police had to go wake him up, as his mother said “go in his own house and get him out of his own bed.” I guess some people can’t imagine their child could do anything wrong, but that kind of enabling behavior doesn’t help.

    • michelle says:

      Yeah, that was exactly the attitude my grandmother took towards the situation with my own father.

      The attitude and reaction of Hyland’s ex’s mother does not surprise me at all.

    • AntiSocialButterfly says:

      I’m sorry for what you have endured, and am glad you made it out safely. It seems that your ex was probably not the first generation to displace agency and make excuses for that behavior in his family. It’s a shitty legacy to pass on.

  20. Artemis says:

    Is this being released without Hyland being able to stop it? For her to finally be able to break free and have this simultaneously being played out in the media must be nothing sort of horrendous. If she wants to empower other people, let her do so in her own time because frankly, she’s been through enough without involuntarily ‘helping other victims’.

    I know people who have been abused (who doesn’t tbh) and we all know that they try their darn hardest to hide it so I very much doubt that this is helping with the healing process. She was also very young and it was her first love, I just can’t imagine the emotional pain she must be going through. I don’t need to read about the abuse to know that.

    • Esmom says:

      I hear you but on the other hand — this was discussed a bit here yesterday — maybe having this public will protect her a bit. He’s clearly dangerous but now he’s at least got a target on his back, so to speak, which might make it more difficult for him to get to her if he tries.

      • AntiSocialButterfly says:

        Your point is well taken, however, I fear that he may be so violent and vengeful that he carries through with his threats, despite visibility. He did say he would kill her and then himself. That sounds to me like someone who has already made his decision because he feels there is no other option, so convinced is he that she is the sole cause of his pain. Were I she, I would be staying with various people for irregular periods, and vary my daily routines/travel to reduce his ability to find her. He is completely rage filled for such a young man, and for continuing to carry those feelings throughout 30 days of rehab (compelling the therapist to tell her to obtain a TRO) tells me he’s getting worse, not better, and has had 30 days to seethe and plan, and plan and seethe.

      • Artemis says:

        Abusers always find a way. Plus, what will the public do when clearly a lot of this played out without anybody knowing? He’s not going to attack her on the street or when she’s attending an event now is he? Even if he would do that, Hyland isn’t exactly a pap target so I highly doubt the public can really offer substantial help when she needs it the most. I also read that Julie Bowen/MF cast members helped her out so it’s not like NOBODY knew and he still didn’t care.

        He seems extremely unhinged and the only people that are in a position to offer help and support are the ones closest to her, not a bunch of strangers on a gossip website. All it seems to do is make them tell their own story, which fair enough, that’s their choice but Hyland has NO choice in this. How is this helping her honestly? She has to live through it NOW, she’s not going to read all of those stories when she is dealing with her own issues.

        You can go to many forums online designed for survivors of DV, there are enough voices out there to lift the spirit up for those who are still suffering or just broke the circle, I strongly disagree with using this girl’s story when it’s clear it’s too recent and she obviously didn’t ask for the media attention.

        I read some of the comments yesterday and I started reading the restraining order today for 2 seconds until I read this:

        Frankly, I am a little embarrassed to even state here

        I don’t think she would be fine with the whole world knowing when she just took a huge step in breaking the abuse, I really don’t.

        Or I just have to think about my friends who were always livid and defensive when people just suggested they ‘might’ be in a not so healthy relationship. Even after the relationships broke down, there was still a lot denial, guilt, anger and love etc. It takes time. She’s not granted this time for herself. That’s just my opinion.

  21. Josefa says:

    I couldn’t even read the whole thing. I’m speechless. I hope Sarah gets all the support and love she needs. She deserves it after enduring such hell.

  22. minime says:

    This is beyond sad. I hope she doesn’t feel bad that this story is out because this can give a lot of power and motivation to other people going through the same situation. And I seriously hope that this exposition might work out into her protection.
    And sorry to say but this guy’s mom is not a good person…what a vile way to deal with the situation that her son created!!

  23. Izzy says:

    That was horrifying to read. Thank goodness she at least has a stron support system around her to help her.

    I don’t usually analyze body language in photos, but why do I feel like in most of the photos I’ve seen of Sarah Hyland and her ex, she’s actually kind of leaning away from her?

    Also, he can delete whatever from the phone, but those texts are likely stored on a server somewhere and can be obtained with a subpoena. Douchebag! (Sorry, just had to throw that in there toward the ex.)

    • Shannon says:

      You are 100% right on the texts being stored. The phone company can release them to the authorities with a warrant.

  24. Tracy says:

    That was difficult to read. I am so glad she survived. It sounds like things easily could have gone a different way. I hope she has proper protection. He does not sound like the type who would be deterred by a restraining order.

  25. Eleonor says:

    Suicide threat is the textbook of the abuser behavior: my sister was in that kind of relationship and when she quit her ex boyfriend used to call me desperate, saying he was going to commit suicide.
    I am happy she has find the strenght to end this story; and I am really shocked by his mother answer: I think he might have grow up in a messed up family.

    • Anony says:

      Yep. It’s totally a classic because it works. The women feel bad and stay. It’s just another method of control they use.

    • tarheel says:

      It’s also classic to threaten pets, and VERY often the abuser will steal and kill the cat or dog.

  26. Gwen says:

    As terrifying it is to read through I can’t even imagine how terrifying it must have been for her to go through it 🙁 I hope he stays away from her and gets proper help so she can be sure he’s out of her life forever. No woman should live like this ever 🙁

  27. Embee says:

    Ugh I wish this was surprising.

    My former MIL’s response to similar behavior by her son was that I needed to be more supportive of him, notwithstanding that I was the sole breadwinner and also did all of the domestic chores and our daughter was in daycare so, “more” was not possible.

    My guess is that the mother has been pretending that they are normal for so long that she literally cannot see her son’s behavior as abnormal. This is how the cycle of abuse is perpetuated.

    Sarah has some real work to do to get herself deprogrammed and I sincerely hope that Prokop leaves her alone; he is frightening. My guess is that the facility had to inform her as part of their professional responsibility to warn her that he has threatened to harm her.

  28. elo says:

    This poor girl! I was in an abusive relationship in my early twenties, he used to threaten also to kill himself and my animals. I really do believe he would have eventually hurt them if I hadn’t booted him out when I did. I know now that the suicide threats were just a way of manipulating me to feel responsible for the entire situation. He too was a drug addict and whenever we finally split, luckily he stayed away from me for the most part. I was not secretive about the split or why, I told everyone that we knew that it was because he was an abuser, I firmly believe my lack of silence kept me safe.

  29. Blackcat says:

    I am shocked by this. Over the years I’ve seen her interviewed at red carpet events, almost every time she would make reference to her boyfriend. Praising him because he had been by her side and so supportive of her throughout all her medical difficulties. That she wouldn’t be where she is today without him. I was surprised, but also impressed, by this seemingly healthy relationship that she at such a young age (began relationship with him at age 18) was involved.

    This is a good reminder to me that one never know what goes on behind closed doors. Ms. Hyland seems to be a kind and thoughtful person. I hope she is safe and has supportive friends and family around her.

  30. HoustonGrl says:

    I think what’s so terrible about these situations is that they kind of sneak up on you. Like the article said, she was with him for a year before anything started. Abusers know just how to manipulate their victims. They also know how to perpetually “hook” a victim into continuing the cycle. At this point, I don’t think it’s her responsibility to help him at all and any involvement on her part perpetuates the abuse. She shouldn’t have created opportunities to see him again, such as those involving their break up. The only way to rid yourself of an abuser is to cut them out of your life completely. I hope that’s clear to people.

  31. Maggie says:

    Been there. Yep, he will likely violate the TRO. I hope she has enough good people around her to watch her back for a few months (maybe more now — he will completely and totally blame her for the fact that this was leaked, typical abuser behavior). Just want to hug her, poor girl.

    And I totally want to search for him mom online and check her (crazy ass) out but I will fight that urge. *shudder*

  32. Other Kitty says:

    This is horrifying. I pray for her safety—right now is a very dangerous time for her. I was in a relationship like this one about 15 years ago. He never hit me, but he manipulated me emotionally and verbally and emotionally abused me. He would treat me like cr**. And I would end up apologizing for it!!! Battered woman syndrome is real and it’s very hard to get out of. Your mind just becomes twisted and you become convinced that if you just try harder, do better, be more careful not to upset him, then it will be better in the future. Only it never gets better.

    Good for her to ask for help. Her friends and family will be the ones to support her at this critical time. I’m praying for her. Strong girl, she is. At a certain point, staying becomes more painful than leaving.

  33. Other Kitty says:

    Also—NO man should EVER call you names. (Pigs would fly before my husband would call me a bad name–he’s just a kind man and he doesn’t have issues with women.)


  34. OhDear says:

    (I’m also glad that the comments so far have been supportive of her.)

  35. OriginalTessa says:

    I realize this is horribly out of place given the gravity of this post and the horrible horrible stuff this poor girl has gone through, but does anyone see the resemblance to Emma Watson’s brother? This guy looks just like him.

    Anyway… hang in there Sarah. You’re young and talented and you broke the cycle and now you can be free. I know that by you doing this, you have helped so many other girls recognize the problems in their own relationships and seek help.

  36. Embee says:

    I have to comment again because I am HORRIFIED by how many of us have been through this, and how similar are the behaviors. It really needs to stop. We need to start educating our children about healthy relationships (and unhealthy ones and the signs) as opposed to glorifying romance and love at all costs/love conquers all.

    Like, now.

    • LAK says:

      Embee: this was my comment yesterday.

      Perhaps taught in schools in the same way that sex ed is taught.

      The cycle of DV needs to be addressed so that people learn to recognise the signs and or practise zero tolerance.

      My mother was in an abusive relationship in her youth and taught us to practise zero tolerance for the same reason every single person on this thread has mentioned ie the fact that the abuse is insidious and sneaks up on you.

      My mother told us often enough that we MUST walk away the first time it happens no matter how much we think we love or are invested in the relationship.

      I’ve probably missed out on some great relationships and people as a result of practising zero tolerance, but I have no regrets.

      I feel so saddened by every tale of horror on this board and I wish so much that everyone had never been abused or they’d recognised sooner rather than later that they were being abused and removed themselves from the situation. The longer they stay, the more likelihood that when they leave, they’ll be killed. Still, that’s not a reason to stay, and I applaud every single person who got out for finding the strength to leave. And I hope the people who are still stuck in the cycle find the strength to leave.

      I feel so sad for Sarah Hyland, and I hope that her support system (and security guards) will help her recover from this.

      • prettylights says:

        @Lak – I agree with your thought about ‘zero tolerance’ and teaching that it school. My Grandma and Mom were very honest with me growing up that my Grandpa, who killed himself in jail before I was born, was an abuser. They obviously didn’t tell me all of it but my Grandma left him (in the 1950’s, when it was such a huge stigma to be a divorced woman) and started working in a factory to support the 4 kids. I always looked up to her knowing what she went through and how she stood up for herself in a time when you just didn’t do that or you were looked down upon. She was also a WAVE in WWII, so yeah, she pretty much kicked ass 🙂 Due to their being so honest about it I have never let a man emotionally abuse me or lay a finger on me. They told me to stand up for myself and demand respect, and I do.

        At any rate, I hope Sarah is ok and stays safe and can be a beacon for other women in these awful situations. No one deserves to be abused in any way.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      I agree. There are so many, many women who have been in similar situations, whether it was as a child or an adult. I really hope something can be done to change this.

  37. joy says:

    His mother is as much of a manipulative lunatic as he is. He’s lucky Sara is a nice girl with nice friends. Because honestly if one of my friends called me to come over and he was doing this crazy violent mess, his wish for being dead might come true. Harsh but true.

  38. Hautie says:

    I am shocked, that I am seeing people trying to shame Sarah, for letting this go public.

    As if hiding it would not provoke more brutal behavior from this jerk. PLEASE.

    She needs to make sure everyone knows he is trying to kill her. Including his dense Mother. Who apparently, is no winner her self.

    I suspect this whole matter has went public… to attempt to help protect Sarah. This assh*le has threaten her life. Already tried to kill her. Probably more than once. He finally scared her so bad, with the incident in the garage. To provoke her into action. Now all the local law enforcement is on alert. Lets hope they snatch his ass up the first time he attempts to get near her.

    I never realize she was only 18, when she moved him into her home. So lets be real. She has been financially supporting him this whole time. And most likely that dense Mother of his too. Now that cash flow has been stopped. Get prepare for more ugliness to happen.

    And sadly… for her own safety. I hope Sarah buys a new home. And never returns to the one under construction. She will never be safe in that home again.

  39. Tippy says:

    I’m worried that Sarah is relying on half-measures when full-measures are warranted.

    She still seems much too concerned with his wellbeing and not upsetting his delicate sensibilities.

    Considering, that at age 23 Sarah has already been on the brink of her own mortality, I’d hope that she realizes that life is too short to subject herself to a life of abuse.

  40. Nicolette says:

    Good Lord. I must say, I don’t have that much faith in the power of a restraining order to keep a lunatic at bey. If someone is truly intent on harming someone they will and a piece of paper isn’t going to stop them. How many times have we seen reports on the news of wives/girlfriends who had such an order winding up dead? Most women can’t afford having a security guard or system in place and these psychos wait for the right moment to pounce. Very frightening and I hope she has that kind of protection in place. As another poster commented above, she will more than likely be looking over her shoulder for years to come. The stress of living like that alone will do harm to her mentally.

    And to all those posting here of their own stories of abuse, I’m so sorry for what you all went through and wish you all the best.

  41. kri says:

    When this came out the other day, some people were blaming TMZ and saying they twist their facts. Yes, TMZ is gross, and they do pull alot of BS. But I also felt like this was real-and now it’s even worse(if that’s possible) than we thought. Private security 24/7. I hope she already has that covered.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      I was commenting about TMZ yesterday. I am not in favor of their tactics, but I would never BLAME them for this. They were not the abusive party, the ex holds all of the blame. However, I do think that they are out of line when they publish legal and medical information, even if it is in their right to do so. Sarah and her advisors should have been in control of the release of this information, not TMZ.

      I hope that she is fully protected. I hope that her advisors are ok with this being public, and that it helps her more than endangers her. Next month, when this story is out of the headlines, this man will STILL be a danger to her even after the public has forgotten about it.

  42. ashley says:

    I was with this guy for eight months. Out of no where one day,he hit me in my face,i was so shocked because he didn’t show any sign of being an abuser. I leave his house that day and never return,i broke up with him the same day. He called me,telling me he was going to kill him self,i told him to go ahead. He is now a man whore around town,last i heard. I love my self too much,i know my worth.

    • nicegirl says:

      Oh Ashley, I am so sorry to hear what that jerk did to you and so happy to hear you are out of that situation.

    • LAK says:

      Ashley…..well done. Zero tolerance. that is what we need to teach everyone. It’s the only way to stop or reduce these instances.

  43. islandwalker says:

    Scary as hell. Praying she doesn’t become another Dominique Dunne. I hope she does not let her guard down. It’s a horrible way to live.

    • Nicolette says:

      Dominique Dunne, hadn’t thought about that in a while. There was also Rebecca Schaeffer who was shot to death at her doorstep by some obsessed crazed fan.

    • Hautie says:

      “Praying she doesn’t become another Dominique Dunne….”

      And Dominique had done every thing she could. Ended the relationship. Changed the locks on her home. But made the mistake of letting him physically get close enough to her… to place his hand on her.

      Men who have choked you once. Will return to finish the deed. Never let them get close to you again.

      And with the way California is with the lack of ability to get justice for domestic violence victims. Who so many ending up dead. I would become a gun owner. That terrible man that killed Dominique Dunne did very little time for her brutal murder.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      I hadn’t heard of Dominique Dunne, so I looked it up.

      I am completely horrified that he was found guilty of only voluntary manslaughter.

  44. Diana B says:

    This was hard to read. I hope they both get the help they need. And that “mother” if she can be called that, shame on her for putting all that guilt on such a young girl.

  45. Elle says:

    Isn t he the guy who gave her half his kidney? I remember her mentioning that that her boyfriend donated half-of-something that saved her life. If it’s him, then it’s even more crazy as a story.

    • lucy2 says:

      Her father donated one of his kidneys to her.
      It’s bad enough to have health issues or an abuser partner, I can’t imagine both at the same time.

  46. Jensies says:

    I volunteer for a San Francisco based non-profit that helps domestic violence survivors, WOMAN Inc, and her story is incredibly sad and scary but not uncommon. The only good thing about this and the Ray Rice story is that more people are seeking help.

    Sadly, the need for shelter greatly outpaces the space. I have to turn away people (because I do get calls from both men and women, though the vast majority are women or lgbtq men) all the time and it’s heartbreaking.

    If you or someone you know is going through this, call the hotline. 18007997233.

    And if you want to give money, this is a great organization to give to:

  47. whatsmyname? says:

    I hope she manages to keep safe that was so hard to read 🙁 And I hope he gets the help that he needs, would not want this happening to someone else.

  48. Decloo says:

    That poor girl. She will be looking over her shoulder for her whole life unless this guy actually commits suicide or actually does harm her and is put away. Obviously, I’m not advocating for that but what sort of options does she really have to protect herself short of full-time bodyguards?

    • Tippy says:

      Martial arts training, pistol permit, German Shepard are all options.

      The guy is already perceived as an abusive coward who will most likely be shunned in Hollywood.

      He’ll probably behave if he hopes to rehab his image and salvage any semblance of an acting career.

      • Shannon says:

        A woman should never carry a gun for self defense unless she is prepared to shoot to kill and has practiced overcoming a lifetime of societal pressure that says women should not be violent. Far, far too many women buy guns for self protection, and end up having the gun used against them. I am a gun owner but I don’t keep a gun on me or even in my house for this reason. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that holding a gun while making a threat is sufficient. It can be taken from you and turned on you by a physically stronger person with even a moment’s hesitation.

    • Anony says:

      I think hiring full time bodyguards is the way to go. She can afford it. Martial arts aren’t that effective against someone way bigger than you unless you’ve practiced for many, many years. A gun could be used against her since she’d likely be unable to pull the trigger. A dog would be another innocent victim that would probably be harmed if he really wanted to get at her. Sorry Tippy but I don’t like any of your suggestions it seems!

      She can afford hired protection and that is the way to go.

      • Tippy says:

        Profession round-the-clock security is a nice idea, but isn’t infallible and can’t be maintained forever.

        Martial arts can be extremely effective in fending off an attacker and building a sense of self confidence regardless of a person’s size. Ed O’Neill is a Black Belt in Jiu-Jitsu and could help her get started.

        A large well trained dog is an excellent deterrent to intruders and could help safe guard her home when she’s away.

        Handguns are now available with fingerprint trigger lock technology which would prevent anyone other than the gun’s owner from firing it.

        I wouldn’t underestimate anyone’s capabilities when faced with a life or death situation.

  49. Becca says:

    I feel awful for Sarah.
    Let’s stop focussing on the loser mother and hold Prokop accountable. I feel like when we blame his mom, the real abuser is less to blame…because we can explain away his behaviours.
    Prokop is obviously a completely unstable douchtard who needs to be back in rehab.

  50. nicegirl says:

    I too have told a mother of her son’s abusive ways, to have it ignored and blamed on me.

    As a mom of 2 sons, it is a lesson I will never unlearn. It is my responsibility and honor to educate them – I hope for a future generation of men (and women) who treat their partners with kindness, love and respect.

    • Mitch Buchanan Rocks! says:

      Ditto – made that mistake as well – was told my MIL, when I let her know what was going on at the time – that was ‘bipolar like her brother’ and after years of daily insults and special evenings of ‘/name calling ‘sessions’ that have lasted hours, gifts ‘taken away’ at Christmas “we think you need to see a doctor”

  51. holly hobby says:

    The filings are a matter of public record. If she did not want this to get out, she would have petitioned to have this filed under seal. The fact that she didn’t means that she didn’t care if the press grabbed the court papers. Anyone can access the papers if they performed a search in the courthouse.

    He sounds horrible. I hope she makes a clean break from him.

  52. Zoe says:

    I’m glad to see such an outpouring of support for this young woman, but I also wish I could see announce of this for women like janay rice or Rihanna.

  53. aquarius64 says:

    I’m glad Hyland got away from this guy. He has some serious problems and the mother sounds horrid. I looked up “Geek Charming”, and Prokop played the Geek, as in the “prince” who won the heart of the snobby princess. Dollar bet Disney will never air that movie again in light of what’s happened. @Zoe, Rihanna and Janay Rice received less support because they went back to their abusive SO’s. They are dismissed as low self-esteem women and in Janay’s case a goldigger who’s willing to take a beating to have the affluent lifestyle of a football player’s wife. I admit I shook my head as to why they went back, but after reading countless stories of abuse that would make your stomach turn I realized not everything is black and white. Hyland will be championed as a young woman who had the guts to leave and get the law involved, plus have a support system of friends and colleagues to help her get out of that horrible situation. That is the feel-good almost everyone will root for, but in truth all victims of domestic violence need support.

    • Zoe says:

      And she was with him for 5 years and went back to him several times. Because that’s how the cycle of abuse works. Victims only get support once they’ve left, which is part of what makes it hard to leave. It’s a double standard that’s unfair.

      ETA: just wanted to add that I’m responding in agreement and appreciate your comment. I re read what I wrote and thought it sounded a little defensive so I wanted to clear that up 😉

  54. tarheel says:

    Her body language in every photo with him is both telling and heartbreaking.

    I’ve been in her shoes. It sucks. I wish her well.

  55. Moi says:

    Dear Sarah,

    I was in the exact same position as you are from the years 19-24. I am 40 now. My empathy exploded reading the restraining order report regarding your ordeal.

    It ended up to the point where when I did leave him, had friends with me for protection and support, he brought out a gun from a room (I had no idea that this pistol existed, or where it had been hidden in such room). My ex put it to his chin and was about to blow his head off. Thank goodness the police showed up right then(!). It’s still on his public record.

    It’s blurry to me because it was so stressful, but I do remember the shock and disbelieve of it all. It was always a feeling before of, “he’s bluffing”. Then that experience was a feeling of “is this really happening?”. It took me a good year and a half, to two years to rebuild my spirit. That’s what abusers do, they break your spirit. The good thing about out spirit, it is resilient and heal(able). It can be re-built, and with wisdom attached, which is irreplaceable.

    You will get through this. Keep your loved ones and protectors close, be aware, but not paranoid. And matter what he has done to you, wish him the best, and pray for him as well, if you’re one that believes in such and prays.

    Love to you, Everything will be okay. You’re beautiful, smart, talented (Modern Family makes me sooooo happy), and you have common sense. It doesn’t feel like you have have common sense right this second, BUT YOU DO. This is a learning experience, and will create wisdom.

    xoxo baby girl

  56. Trashaddict says:

    If the director of rehab truly thinks this guy is threatening her, they should commit him. I wonder if they tried. I know a therapist is required to report / warn families, exes, etc . if someone’s a danger. Can’t remember whether legally there is more required.

  57. AMC says:

    This poor woman. Having been through the same thing, I’m so glad that she got out of the relationship and also got a restraining order against him. He sounds like he has serious mental issues (much like my ex). I felt sick reading about it.

  58. qtip says:

    For those who need it: There is a site called 7 cups of Tea. You can chat with someone 24/7 and they will read listen and follow up. There are also resources on that site as well. Plus, even though this site is for gossip, share your story anyway. We are always here.

    Check out united way agencies as well. They can point you in the direction for cash, a job, counseling, etc.

    Some hospitals and nonprofits offer free group sessions as well.