FYI: Anthony Kiedis, 52 years old, has a 21-year-old Aussie model girlfriend


This is just an FYI, because it’s always interesting to note when much-older men are dating teenagers or ladies barely out of their teens. Remember how we talked about 57-year-old Steven Bauer and his 18-year-old Tea Party girlfriend? Well, there’s a similar situation happening with Red Hot Chili Peppers frontman Anthony Kiedis. Kiedis is 52 years old… and he’s dating a 21-year-old Australian model named Helena Vestergaard. Both of them look their ages, don’t they? I would even say that she looks younger than 21 and he looks older than 52.

According to The Daily Mail, Anthony and Helena have been together 2 years already. Which means they got together when he was 50 and she was 19. UGH!!! Helena has previously said: “I’m not an ageist. You can’t help who you fall in love with.” Whatever, girl. Anthony is also father to a son, Everly Bear, with an ex-girlfriend. Everly is only 7 years old – I can’t believe he doesn’t have any other kids? That’s weird, right? The Red Hot Chili Peppers were everything in the 1990s. It seems strange that he didn’t father any children back then.

Anyway, I’m sure some people knew about this couple already, but it was news to me. There were new photos of Anthony and Helena out and about a few days ago – go here to see. Is this gross? Or is this just the rock star life? Would it actually be crazier for Kiedis to date a woman in her late 40s or whatever?


Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.

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166 Responses to “FYI: Anthony Kiedis, 52 years old, has a 21-year-old Aussie model girlfriend”

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  1. Jules says:


    • mkyarwood says:

      That is what I said! Specially after looking at those Grandpa free balling sweat pants. EWWWWW.

    • Detritus says:

      Nope nope nope, so gross. Sorry, people are idiots at 21, they need to date other idiots and work out their idiot stuff.

      • Sabrine says:

        He’s buying her bling along with other goodies and giving her money. He’s got the hot young body he desires. so in some rather sick ways, they’re both benefitting. Eventually she won’t be able to handle dating Grampa anymore and will bolt, or he’ll get tired of trying to relate to a girl barely out of her teens. It will just have to run it’s course.

    • LeAnn Stinks says:

      I agree. It also doesn’t help that she looks like a baby. Yuck, just yuck.

    • BooBooLaRue says:

      took the words out of my mouth

    • Brittaki says:

      That last photo with her hand on his leg gives me the skeevs big-time. She looks like his daughter or his niece, not like someone he should be banging. I wonder what her mother thinks of this?

    • Someonestolemyname says:

      Yuck he almost looks like her granddad.

  2. The Wizz says:

    She wasn’t even born when he was cool!

  3. ncboudicca says:

    Pretty girl. I guess even an old rock star still has the rock star lifestyle that appeals to and helps him relate to someone young – stay up late, sleep late…? On the other hand, I’m only a few years younger than he is, and I wouldn’t date him because he looks too old. 🙂

  4. GiGi says:

    A friend of mine used to date his dad *while we were still in high school* – soooo… maybe it runs in the family? *shudder*

    I’m pretty open, but this is just too much, even for me.

    • Erinn says:

      Yeah, that one also doesn’t surprise me, given the few things I’ve heard about the father, haha. Super weird. But I guess if you see your pops doing it, it doesn’t seem as abnormal. The gross factor is definitely high, and I love the RHCP.

    • Dani says:

      Yeah, his father is super gross. Didn’t he let Anthony lose his virginity with one of his girlfriends?

    • GiGi says:

      Yeah – I love RHCP, too… enough that I at least remember Anthony Kiedis being just SO hot… but this girl? What’s her excuse?

    • GByeGirl says:

      Yeah, Blackie Dammett is a nasty old skeeve. I remember him from the Reptile House when I was an underage club kid.

    • Flora says:

      He is a Dirty Old Man. Didn’t he grow up with his dad, who was just as disgusting, in LA during his teens? The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. I also remember reports of different members of the RHCP supposedly sexually harassing girls during the 90s.

  5. bellenola says:

    What I don’t understand, is how is she a model? I have met him a couple of times, I’m five-nine and he was a lot shorter than me.

    • LAK says:

      Perhaps she does editorials only?

      Only runway models have to be 5ft 9in+. Editorial models can be shorter. Kate Moss is only 5ft 6/7in though she’s the exception to the runway model height.

      • Bridget says:

        Kate Moss was an exception, though. Usually you only see shorter models because they’ve already achieved success in another arena (like perhaps athletics) or they’re not fashion models so much as lad mag models.

      • Isadora says:

        Usually models nowadays do both, editorials and runway, because agencies look for girls that can do both. There are plenty of pretty, beautiful, interesting girls out there who are also tall and thin and being a model is something a lot of young girls are willing to do (esp. if they come from low-income countries like certain parts of Russia and it’s their only chance to become rich and famous). So an agency usually wants a portfolio of girls that can work all year – doing fashion shows during the fashion weeks and editorials when there are no fashion shows. It’s VERY competitive out there, so if you miss out on either editiorials or runways then most of the time you have no chance at all. Kate Moss is always brought up as a “short” model but that’s because it is so very rare that someone with her height gets as famous as model.

        Sometimes, however, you see shorter models in a portfolio when they are very young (around 13/14) as the agency hopes they will still grow and learn in the meantime a bit about modelling business. Or agencies who work mainly locally – they often have “shorter” models who can get a work via editiorials in local magazines. But these are no big names by any means. So maybe she’s one of them, but I don’t think she earns a lot of money that way. Most of these not-big-name models do it on the side during school or while studying.

    • A says:

      She might be a “model” – as in an aspiring model?

  6. Esmom says:

    She’s beautiful, and she looks about 14 to me. I had no idea he was 52 already.

    • AntiSocialButterly says:

      I expected the title of the article to be something about Kiedis and his daughter when I saw the thumbnail of them in profile the car.

  7. jinni says:

    I have no problem with this because they are both adults. The only thing that weirds me out a bit is how much she looks like him when he was younger, except she has a smaller nose. They look like they are related.

    • danielle says:

      I think its something to do with many famous people being narcissistic. A lot of famous couples look alike to me.

    • AntiSocialButterly says:

      Above, I commented that I thought the article would be about him & his *daughter* based on the picture in the articles list.

    • Elisa the I. says:

      Yep, they look incredibly alike, that’s the first thing i noticed as well….

    • Ann says:

      I wouldn’t call a 19 year old an “adult”. When you’re 19, you are majorly naive and lack life experience. The brain isn’t even fully formed until you are in your late twenties.

      Men who date women several decades their junior generally have major issues. I always tend to feel sorry for these young women.

  8. captain hero says:

    Oh I’m sure he has plenty of kids out there. The drummer, Chad Smith has seven kids from three or four differen mothers.
    She looks very young. Super creepy

  9. I actually didn’t think he looked fifty–he looks more like someone in their 30s/40s who looks HARD because of excess drugs, alcohol. He doesn’t really look old to me, he looks hard and put away wet–like he would look amazingly younger if he didn’t party so hard. He looks like he should look younger than he really is, and kinda does in an awful way.

    And I guess more power to them. These guys want a hot piece of young such and such, and these girls want to be with someone rich/powerful, and who will (sometimes) sweep them off their feet. Everyone gets something out of it. Maybe she’ll grow up and realize that this sort of relationship isn’t what she wants; maybe she won’t.

    • Calcifer says:

      @Virgila Corolianus I really like the precision with which you describe how someone can look ‘hard’ because of excess drugs, alcohol. I’ve noticed that often, too.

      I can see why dating an older, more mature guy could be attractive for a young woman. That being said some of these older guys aren’t very grown up, or are even downright immature – especially when they have always used a lot of alcohol and/or drugs 🙂

      • Yes, this exactly. I could sort of see myself dating someone older than me (which isn’t QUITE so taboo to me, because my mom is 13 years older than my dad, and they got married just when he was able to vote), but I wouldn’t ever date/marry an older man who makes it a ‘habit’ of dating younger women. I would want to be the exception. I find it a little creepy when otherwise charming, intelligent, awesome guys continually date immature people–not even just a huge age difference.

      • homegrrrl says:

        I wonder if she purposely dresses Lolita-ish? My teenage stepdaughter has the identical wardrobe. It’s disturbing.

    • Nicole says:

      Maybe she’ll grow up and realize she’s been dumped for having grown up.

  10. Kristen says:

    She looks positively miserable in every one of these pictures. :/

  11. velourazure says:

    I’m sure he’s about 22 emotionally so this makes perfect sense.

    • littlemissnaughty says:

      Well he must be because WHAT could they have to talk about otherwise? That’s my only “problem” with these types of relationships, what do people talk about? I’m 30 and I can’t even joke about dating a 20-year-old because oh my God, we would have nothing to talk about!

      Also, I just had a thought that if this would be me at his age, the guy I’ll date at 52 would be born in a year. I’m horrified beyond belief.

      • Isadora says:

        Maybe they don’t talk much? 😀
        On the other hand I talk to a lot of people who are older than me on a regular basis. We all talk to our parents, our parent’s friends, our older co-workers, our neighbours etc., so obviously there is something to talk about. Granted, this is mostly small talk, but there are so many age appropriate couples out there who talk about nothing except vapid things and small talk. I would shrivel up and die in such a relationship.

        However the thing with Kiedis and his much younger gf is also that he’s old and famous and she’s young and unknown, so I guess they have a rather skewed power dynamic going on which is also fueled by the age gap.

  12. Marie-France says:

    This is gross. I f my daughter introduced me to a 52-year old boyfriend when she is 21 I would be really worried. To maintain a young spirit is not covering yourself in tattoos, dress like a skater and popping Viagra all day. It is to keep an open mind and evolve as a person. There is some serious regression going on here…

  13. lower-case deb says:

    not going to comment on the romance part: of age etc.
    but just playing photo-assumption based on the photos, she looks like a long-suffering teenager on parent-chaperoned excursion.

    (my eldest is beginning to be that age when going out with mommy is no longer cool. downright chore in fact).

    • Esmom says:

      That’s exactly what I thought, too, lol.

      But I will comment on the age thing. One of my closest friends is dating someone 25 years younger than him. I was highly suspicious and upset at first but they have been together for a couple years now and seem very happy. They do have plenty to talk about and enough in common for it to somehow work (although I still can’t help but feel that my friend’s nice income might be a factor). My friend is happy and knows that it’s likely not going to last forever, so I have tried to relax about it.

  14. elisabeth says:

    I don’t get the appeal…his face could stop a clock

  15. Kiddo says:

    Maybe emotionally they are the same age? It’s not particularly shocking. Isn’t this May/December relationship part and parcel of the rock star lifestyle/compensation package, or why they get into it at least to a large extent?

    • Artemis says:

      I don’t think so, he was doing this (and worse) from the start. It’s not because he’s a rockstar, it’s because he’s a predator who can’t get away with dating underage girls in public like he used to back in less progressive times.

      • Kiddo says:

        Oh, and eww, I never heard this before, but she isn’t underage now. I wonder how many rock stars actually do have a thing for the fans, who generally are much younger. Wasn’t there something disgusting about child porn and one of the members of the Who?

      • Bej says:

        Exactly. He has consistently dated girls in their teens to early 20’s his whole life. He ages, they never do. I remember reading his book ‘Scar Tissue’ & being repulsed by his ever growing list of young girlfriends & his predatory nature. I mentioned it to someone who knew him & they laughed & said everyone knows he’s a ‘ChickenHawk’. Not funny to me & his fame shouldn’t give him a pass.

      • greenmonster says:

        @Kiddo: I guess more rock stars have a thing for their young fans than any of us would like to know. Iggy Pop, Jimmy Page or David Bowie are just three of them who allegedly had affairs with very underage groupies.

        Pete Townsend of The Who was placed on the sex offenders register because he allegedly visited a child porn website – although the actual website didn’t contain (thank god) child porn. If I remember correctly he claimed he wanted to do some research for his autobiography… and he was abused when he was a child?! Can’t really remember, but something like that. Very fishy…

      • doofus says:

        greenmonster, I used to work with a woman who (WAY back in the day) was a sound engineer for a lot of big name bands, mostly the Stones, but she did work for Led Zep and Elton John as well.

        she had NOTHING bad to say about Mick Jagger or Keith Richards, but she did say that Jimmy Page had a thing for the young ones. like, he liked them around 12 or 13.

      • greenmonster says:

        @doofus, that is horrible. I only heard the story about his 14 year old “girlfriend” and that he basically kidnapped her. To this day she glorifies this moment and their “relationship” – which is so sad. She just can’t or won’t see, there was nothing magical about him, just a creepy pervert at his worst. On top of that 12 and 13 year old girls? Can’t believe he had never been charged with anything.

      • greenmonster says:

        Oh and let’s not forget Elvis who “fell in love” with Priscilla when she was what…14? Billy Wyman had a relationship with 14 year old Mandy Smith, Don Johnson (not a rockstar, I know) met Melanie Griffith when she was 14, Jerry Lee Lewis married his 13 year old cousin and the list goes on. It is disgusting. And to me 52 and 21 is equally awful. Five years ago he could have had a midlife crisis and she was still in high school!

  16. Florence says:

    She looks about 12

    • bns says:

      12? Really?

      • Lee says:

        Yeah, 12.
        My 12 year old daughter is tall, developed and looks 15, easily. And we aren’t too happy about it either.

      • doofus says:

        well, I’d go so far as to say that my 13 y.o. niece (who, granted, is quite tall for her age) looks older than this GIRL.

        these pics look like a father and daughter. especially since, as some have said, they resemble each other. and props to Kiedis for letting his son sit on his lap in the front seat while driving. yeah, I know it’s not an actual car but it’s still unsafe.

    • Emily says:

      Was going to say 14-16, but hey.

  17. LAK says:


  18. aenflex says:

    If she wants to be with him, so be it. I can’t fault him for not passing up on a young woman. If anything it’s gross on her.

  19. captain says:

    I really don’t care about the age difference: if they’re in love, that’s great: love is a beautiful thing and she is an adult woman. If there are no drugs involved in this relationship, then it’s really not something horrible.

  20. Entropy says:

    I’m an Aussie, and have never heard of her. Not that that means much…
    I do remember quite a while ago a gossip presenter on Aussie TV reporting that AK had an Aussie girlfriend, but paid no attention at the time. I don’t have an issue with wide age differences, but you are so right,
    Kaiser – she does look a bit younger than 21 and he looks more like 72. Perhaps that’s why this pairing looks , um, ugh.

  21. bns says:

    She looks her age to me, but this is still pathetic.

  22. Lucy2 says:

    They look like father and daughter.

  23. Mop top says:

    Bless his heart, he is not aging well.

  24. Jess says:

    Yuck, she looks about 14 and like she could be his daughter, he was out banging groupies before she was born! She’s not an ageist? Right, if he was just some 52 year old guy living down the street making 30k a year and not famous I doubt she’d be with him.

    I lose so much respect for guys who do this, there’s something disturbing about an older man dating a teenager and it creeps me out. I didn’t even know Paul Walker did the same thing until after he died and it changed my whole view of him. It’s just weird.

    • Godwina says:

      At least Walker was a golden god, though. I can see the appeal beyond the fame and $$, with Walker. I can see him legit being attractive to younger women. He walked in beauty, so…

      When I was young, you couldn’t pay me to date older men–I was never attracted to them. I’m in my early 40s now and stick very close to my age-range. FIT age range, because I’m superficial as feck. 😛

      All that said, though–to each their own.

      • Jess says:

        Lol, he was a golden god!

        I was the same way when I was younger, I thought older men were yucky, now that I’m one of those yucky 33 year olds I’m still only attracted to guys close to my age, definitely can’t go younger, maybe a bit older but not too much;)

      • LAK says:

        Godwina: may I join you on the ‘FIT superficial, but age appropriate age range’?

        Jess: Ditto Paul Walker.

        And Ditto attraction to age appropriate people.

        I remember 1hen I was 19, being chatted up by a guy who was 27 and being so grossed out by his age. LOL.

        I can’t imagine dating someone older/younger than 5yrs of my current age.

      • Godwina says:

        Yes, this “Walker was into teens” things is news to me. Puts a different slant on things, agreed.

        I am delighted to welcome others into my “superficial” playground–I thought for sure I would be scolded for that!

  25. Artemis says:

    I rebuke all of this. All of it.

    I had a massive RHCP phase during my teens (mandatory) and during that phase, I read his biography and many other accounts of him and Flea (River Phoenix connection). This man is consistently attracted to girls in their early 20s, I would say he’s an ephebophile because they look like they’re in their late teens.

    He bragged about having sex with underage girls, which is statutory rape. He took pictures of one of his exes (Ione Skye) and she was 18 but they were together when she was underage. Also, the way he laments about these ‘relationships’ is how predators justify their actions for example: ‘she acted more adult than she was’, ‘she was sexually curious’ etc etc. He said back then that Ione was ‘his type’. Surely, it’s pretty clear what his type was and will always be? For the few women he dated in public (briefly), there are more barely legal girls.

    I cannot understand how he got away with confessing all of this and people still not knowing that he has done this and not really caring about his questionable preferences at present.

    He’s scum. And it also made me realise that the RHCP make garbage, only their first four albums are good, the fifth one was their descent into mainstream and we all know where that ended. Oh and that Sinéad O’Connor read him like a tea leaf; dumped him and barely acknowledge his existence while he dragged out their fling in his ‘music’.

    I rebuke all of it.

    • Marie-France says:

      Artemis, I did not know anything of the above and I already thought it was too much. I guess everything has a natural explanation.

    • SpookySpooks says:

      I’m a massive RHCP fan and I prefer their Californication to Stadium Arcadium era.
      I also read Scar Tissue and with his childhood he could have ended up much worse.

      Why are people giving Sam Taylor Johnson and Patrick Stewart a pass, but this is gross?

      • Artemis says:

        There are plenty of people with awful childhoods who didn’t become predators. I’d like to add that Kiedis portrays himself as some spiritual deep human being and his choice in girlfriends and the way he behaves in relationships is a sign that he’s a fraud.

        I can delve deeper in May/December romances but we are talking about Kiedis here. The people you mentioned don’t have a history of going after underage and barely legal people AND bragging about it.

        Also, Kiedis’ relationships last for a few years while the your examples MARRIED their significant others. Kiedis’ GFs seem interchangeable while the others seemed to actually love and care for their partners. Kiedis cheats and lies and it’s a pattern in most of his relationships. After all, he ditched the mother of his son because he can’t grow up and be committed to one person.

        He grows older and the girls all stay the same age, dates them for a few years and then dumps them for another ’19-year old model’. He was Dicaprio-ing before that was even a thing…

        He is a gross and if you’re a fan, you should know that. There is no justifying his behaviour.

      • Kiddo says:

        He must have one hellava Viagra budget.

      • Tania says:

        Sam Taylor Johnson and Patrick Stewart get a “pass” because their spouses do not look like underage children. This young girl looks to be about 14 and in my eyes this relationship borders on pedophilia because she looks practically prepubescent.

    • Bored suburbanhousewife says:

      These two got together when she was 18. RHCP made some genius albums but in my opinion those are largely attributable to genius guitarist John Fruscianti who left the band for good in 2009. I especially love the album By The Way even though I know Frusciante was ultimately dissatisfied with how it was mixed. Whether you like the Stadium Arcadium era, which I do, depends on how you feel about the creative burst Frusciante experienced post rehab when he was very influenced by The Beach Boys Pet Sounds, The Beatles and other British Invasion bands and they departed from their earlier pure funk pop rap sound.

      Kiedis seems likes he had an entirely dysfunctional childhood so not surprised. He is very buffed for his age but agree he looks like he has lived hard and done a lot of drugs– which he has.

      • Dido's Ghost says:

        Thanks for recognizing the contributions of John Frusciante — His solo music is stellar, too.

    • Emily says:

      Didn’t Paul Walker openly date a sixteen year old? Then James Franco got caught preying on a seventeen year old. This behavior seems par for the course as far as famous people go. Most of them seem to avoid legal trouble even if it’s public knowledge.

  26. Dido's Ghost says:

    Gross, indeedy. Didn’t know that the RHCP song “She’s Only 18” was actual dialogue bantered between the little angel and the little devil standing on his shoulders….

  27. epiphany says:

    Another silly, middle aged man chasing his lost youth. He’s probably deluded himself into believing she’s actually into him, as opposed to enjoying his money and celeb status.
    What on earth do they talk about – his bank account?

  28. Lisa says:

    My opinion on why Keidis doesn’t have a gazzillion kids all over the place was because smack likely destroyed his chances of having any viable sperm, lol.

  29. D says:

    Not surprising.

    Has anyone seen that graph OK Cupid compiled from their data on how men & women rate each other based on age?

    Whether they’re 20, 30, 40, or 50 years old, men find women who are 20-23 most attractive. Women tend to find men who are close to their own age most attractive.

    Basically, I believe most men around AK’s age would be utterly thrilled to date a woman who was 20+ years younger and would do so if they could.

    They simply can’t because, unlike AK, they don’t have personal attributes (fame, internationally-recognized talent, $$$$, etc.) that would make younger women overlook the large age difference.

    • Kitten says:

      That graph is so depressing.
      Then again, maybe I’m a hypocrite because I find men in their twenties to be the most beautiful–to look at, not to date in a serious way.

      • Kiddo says:

        If we set up the relative age difference, you would have to be dating toddlers, at this point. There is something to be said for sexual prime in early 20s for men and in the 30s for women where there is sexual compatibility.

    • Ann says:

      Actually, most women will find men in their 20s the most physically attractive as well (because they are). You may have noticed that young women never shack up with non-famous or poor men decades older than them.

      For her sake, I just hope she’s out and about with him just for show for his “masculine and virile” credentials and she doesn’t actually have sex with him (and that she has plenty of younger, hot side pieces).

    • Artemis says:

      Yeah, but there are a lot of assholes on dating sites. More misses than hits.

      This is how I comfort myself okay 🙂

      I personally find men in their early 30s the most attractive. The college years are over, settling into a career and achieving goals, hopefully mature enough to know what they want. I’m 24, so we could still be able to grow together. This is the ideal 30 year old though.
      I find early 20s and 40+ also attractive, but in a different way. I would never want to date them. Hook up yeah 😀 Date: hell no.

    • k says:

      That’s because a lot of men have extremely fragile egos. This is a bit of a tangent, but I laugh at the ones who say that this is because of looks and women supposedly aging like milk (completely untrue, if anything, women age better than men). I’m 30 and look 20. Men of all ages hit on me thinking I’m around that age. However, despite their initial attraction, a good chunk of them lose interest when they find out my real age, so clearly it has nothing to do with looks alone or my personality. If it was only about looks, then my real age shouldn’t matter.

      That’s why I don’t take things like that OKCupid thing too seriously. I’m guessing that if someone put my picture up and listed my age as 30, I would be rated as less attractive than if they listed my age as 22 using the same picture. That does not reflect whatsoever on my actual attractiveness level – only on the men rating me. These men are attracted to the number itself and not the personality or package that comes with it.

  30. Adrien says:

    I want to make a popcorn trick joke on the last photo but Kiedis looks like a creepy uncle and the girl looks like a child, so no.

    • Calcifer says:

      Actually, in that last photo, I think the girl looks very motherly and Kiedis looks like an overgrown 7-year-old!

  31. elle says:

    Eh, let him live! Lol
    Im also 21 & my babys father is 45. We met when i was 18. We are still together.

    • Pia says:

      I would have SERIOUS reservations and get creeper vibes from a 42 year old showing interest in me at 18. Triple ewwww.

      • doofus says:

        yeah, I gotta agree.

        when I was 18, anyone over 25 who showed an interest immediately raised a red flag.

        and if a 42 y.o. hit on me, I’d probably tell him “I think your daughter is in my Philosophy 101 class”.

      • elle says:

        I prefer them older, smarter, wiser… my man is an excellent father to our son, & extremely good looking & doesnt look a day over 30, so if thats “Ewwwww” to you, so be it. Im happy. Being with someone in their 20s, would be like being with a kid. Its no eww to anyone in my circle or my family. 🙂

    • Beth says:

      But you know he is only with you because of your age, right? That is what makes people go “eww.” Not trying to be mean, but can you see this relationship flourishing when you are in your 30’s? Men often go for much younger, no matter how old they get, because they don’t want to envision dating women after a certain age. I’ve known men in their 50’s and 60’s who claim they could never see themselves dating a woman over 30, even though they are old enough to be a father to a woman in her 30’s.

  32. whatever says:

    This is disappointing and totally evidence of partriarchal ageism at work, but hey, not surprising at all. Have you every taken a close look at heterosexual men’s stated age range on a dating site like OK Cupid? Once men hit their mid to late 30s, a super high percentage of them publicly admit to not being willing to date women their own age if they are even one year older than them, and often even end their publicly stated upper age range one or more years younger than them, but of course are willing to date up to 15 or 20 years younger. They aren’t even willing to date women their own age, which includes in my view women up to 5 years older than them. This is like a religion, and okcupid has written articles about it after crunching their data on desires and messaging patterns.

    I’m even finding this trend to exist among men I know, who claim to be very feminist and don’t care if they ever have children. This is the world in which we live, where women are largely viewed as non-sexually desirable once they hit a certain age, even when they look youthful or at least as youthful as their male compatriots, and the males don’t want children. Unless, of course, the men seeking to date them are a decade or two older. Then it’s okay to be a middle aged hetero woman and looking to date.

    I’m 43, look about maximum 35 or 6 because I have hardly any wrinkles, no grey hair, very youthful skin and I don’t dress like a frump, and I’m finding that most of the men on online sites willing to date me are above my age, to wayyyy older. Oh, and also a handful of dudes who are wayyy younger than me are into it. Like 28-32. But men in my own actual age range, like 38-44, they’d rather not. Even when I look WAYYY younger than them. They have to be 45 or above to be into me. Even when those same dudes used to hit on me five to ten years ago, or certainly do try to hit on me in real life when they don’t know my age. They seem to assume I’m 5 to 10 years younger than I am. They’ll even tell me that. As do many people socially. Totally shocked to learn my real age.

    So yeah, getting older and being a woman is kind of difficult. Not much has changed in this regard. Men just love holding on to their youth, and feeling more accomplished and worldly than their partners. It’s such a bummer.

    • It is totally creepy. My mom told me about this guy that she hung out with for a short period, with an eye towards dating. He was in his early fifties and LOOKED IT. She was 30. They basically were having a good time–they hung out together, went out to eat, and were making their way into a serious relationship. UNTIL he found out that she was 30. My mom was/is VERY babyfaced, and has always looked AMAZING (not that I’m not biased)–and he thought that she was 21/22 TOPS. And then he completely backed up from her. Didn’t want to see her anymore. And he was over FIFTY. And wasn’t a John Stamos i.e. was hot and aged AMAZINGLY. He thought she was a silly little girl impressed by his age and stories. Gross.

    • Sara says:

      the same okcupid site also says women find 80% (or so) of men below average looking, meaning they would only go for 9/10 and 10/10. so take it with a grain of salt.

      but our society certainly has become more superficial, its not like one gender is really bad and the other is great. why do you think so many unemployed men are single and guys who make money with food speculation in the third world have women throwing themselves at them? thats the same kind of superficial.

      • otaku fairy says:

        I agree that it’s the same kind of superficial and you know what? I say let consenting adults be superficial in their relationships if they want to be, as long as they’re not hurting anybody. If someone wants to be with another adult based on pure physical attraction or a desire to cling to their youth, that’s their business to me- I may find the situation a little humorous or amusing, or in some cases icky if the older man or woman looks all old and unattractive, (there goes my own superficiality) but I don’t see it as oppression or immoral. I feel the same way about people of either sex who date/get with/ marry people for financial comfort or status. As long as it’s not an abusive relationship, both of the adults are okay with that situation and able to work it out so that they’re getting what they want, I say let them be. We all have different personal opinions on what the proper, right, or acceptable adult relationship is.

        Personally, though, I’m mainly attracted to guys within my own age range- 20-27. Occasionally there’s some 19, 18, or yes, even 17-year old guy I find hot (but at 22, I would never date a 17-year-old because I wouldn’t with anyone’s outrage). The oldest guy I’ve ever been attracted to was like 35.

      • Kitten says:

        It’s not that it’s “immoral” (I don’t think anyone is saying that) but it’s sh*tty as hell for women who are doing online dating in hopes of finding a decent, quality dude who wants more than a roll in the hay with someone they find sexy.

        To be fair, an online dating site lends itself to a very superficial format, what with the photos and the short Q&As. But it still sucks for women who are looking to make a real connection and get away from the one-night hookup bar scene.

        Before I met my current boyfriend my issue with online dating was the opposite of the OP’s —– all the guys that were interested in me were in their twenties. I went with the flow and dated guys 5-10 years younger than me for the past 6 years or so until I met my current BF who is 34 (I’m 35).

        @Whatever-I think the issue (and this is just my theory) is that there just aren’t a lot of guys in the 30-40 age range dating online because most are married. Basically you’re left with 20-somethings who are looking for a good time or 50-year-old divorcees. It’s tough, but just know that it’s not you at all, it’s just a very limited selection of age-appropriate men that are available.

    • Mi says:

      And such men preferations cause lack of equality in getting good paid jobs by women in general because those men in their 40s and 50s want to have a powerful position in job to have enough money to impress 20 something women and dating/having affair while their older partners/wives are focused on rising their children or/and giving up their jobs.It’s a simple mechanism:men are defending their strong positions in job and don’t want to share them with women who are at their age,the middle aged women because those women would be more powerful and having too much money and be less depended on their husbands so they would not tolerate their husbands’ affairs with young women.Depending wife will be more tolerant and it’s a best situation for husband,he is basicaly free especially if he lives in partriarchal countries/societies.People say that men have to work because they feed the families,no,they want to have money to do whatever they want and get away with it.

    • lirko says:

      Man, these dating sites… You guys are making me glad I’m married lol! I’m 36 and when I got married 11 years ago the dating site phenom was in its infancy, but had it existed on the scale it does now, I could see it having an overall negative effect on how I viewed the opposite sex, like, in general. I mean we’ve all know creepy peeps, but these statistics make it seem like most men, if they could get away with it would prefer “women” only a few years of their teens *ugh*

    • Cindy says:

      This is so depressing. I’ve never been on a dating sight, and now I never will!

  33. Jayna says:

    He looks like he wears hairpieces to me.

  34. FingerBinger says:

    Everything about this is wrong. He’s literally dating someone young enough to be his daughter.

  35. Jen says:

    she looks A LOT like my 12 year old! He should be dating me instead.

  36. scout says:

    Sure she is 21?! She looks like a 16 yr old. What’s wrong with these young girls, can’t find a young handsome men anymore?

  37. embee says:

    Had she ever even heard of the band before she met him? I listened to them back in high school. When she had just been born. Yuck. Being with someone old enough to be my dad isn’t something I would want. She looks like she’s young enough to date my 13 year old

  38. Cindy says:

    Gross gross gross. She looks like his child. Just yuck.

  39. Tatianna says:

    He gets away with it, madonna does the same and people say she is cougar and not ageing gracefully.

    • FingerBinger says:

      Madonna gets called a cradle robber not a cougar.

      • Tatianna says:

        Well exactly. He’s a “cradle robber” too. But gets away with it because he’s a man.

      • doofus says:

        when you say “gets away with”, what do you mean, exactly?

        he’s getting called gross by most of the posters on here, and I think most of those posters think the same thing of Madonna. that is, it’s gross and she looks desperate. it HIGHLIGHTS her age, it doesn’t detract from it.

        same with this creeper. I don’t see how he’s “getting away with it” any more so than Madonna is.

      • Tatianna says:

        @ doofus
        Right now he is because this site calls him out but I don’t see that happening in mainstream media. And they can’t help snarking about madonnas boyfriends.

      • doofus says:

        well, to be fair…the RHCP are just not as mainstream as Madonna. that’s probably why. also, Madonna is someone whose private life has always been gossip fodder, which is how she likes it. her relationships have always been in the tabs.

        the RHCP, not so much. other than their music, you don’t hear much about them.

  40. Ciria says:

    He looks like her father in that one pic they are waking together.

  41. MickeyM says:


  42. Jh says:

    Man, she looks like she could be his 15 year old daughter. She’s a beauty, though.

  43. Reece says:

    Oookay…on the other hand it’s Anthony Kiedis, he’s not Mick Jagger gross.

  44. Katerina says:

    Disgusting! She looks like a child. And how is she a model? She’s not that great.

    • Naddie says:

      Exactly. Not only her physical resembles a child: her facial expression does so. Also, I think that all it takes to be a model is being tall and thin, because this girl here is very ordinary looking.

  45. Ginger says:

    I have so much history with the Red Hot Chili Peppers it’s not even funny. So many stories. I’m not surprised he’s with a young girl. But really Anthony? It looks like he’s out with his two kids. If they’ve been together for two years and they are happy then so be it I suppose. She’s old enough to make up her own mind. But I can’t help thinking…Daddy issues!

  46. PixieWitch says:

    the way he is looking at the kernel of popcorn is just making me laugh…
    “Take me to the place i love….take me all the way” he loves popcorn.

  47. shizwhat says:

    It’s gross, its just gross. There’s no way to twist the rationale, the semantics or anything. It’s gross. Legal, yes. Love, maybe. Gross, absofrackinglutely.

    The older I get (just turned 34) the more grossed out I am by men. I hate to make a sweeping generalization like that because females (myself especially) are not without fault… but the concept of “man” that I had in my head my whole life just does not exist. Shall I hate them all because they didnt live up to a standard I had in my head? Of course not. But I am sad and nauseated over it to say the least.

  48. Bobbiesue says:

    Are we sure she’s 21? She looks 17 in the header photo. This is his MO. Baby mama looked very similar. Ick.

  49. vodkainmyveins says:

    considering this is the man who impregnated a teenager, I can’t say I’m surprised..

  50. Bobbiesue says:

    What we know for certain is it will not last. See: all his other previous relationships. See also: Leo DiCaprio. They eventually get turned in for a newer “model.”

  51. greenmonster says:

    So, if she doubles her age – he is still older than her… Huh…

  52. Penelope says:

    He in no way looks older than 52, even though he’s dressed like a slob and this whole thing is icky.

  53. Josefa says:

    Ew. But at the same time, rock stars dating girls disturbingly younger than them? No surprises there.

  54. jenn12 says:

    He was the coolest guy back in the 90s… so depressing that he never grew up and bought into the hype. Nothing wrong with it in the legal sense, but just so damn skeevy. At least he doesn’t father children with half the female population- will give him credit for that at least.

  55. lrm says:

    Also, though I agree with the majority sentiment on this post with AK in particular as well as the topic in general, sometimes a couple looks further apart in age than they are. Ex: when i dated my now husband, people sometimes gave him dirty or creeper looks. He was 30 and early balding, and I was 27. But I looked early 20’s max (and to some late teens) and he looked mid thirties. We still look like we have at least a ten year spread, though obviously it’s not as much of an issue, nearly twenty years later. Even some of my relatives were wondering what’s up when they first saw pics years ago. So, it’s a good reminder to ‘never judge a book by its cover’. Obviously, that doesn’t apply to this thread topic, but since we’re on the subject….

  56. Sara says:

    I can’t with this age difference. Suddenly John Mayer and Taylor Swifts age difference isn’t sounding so bad…

  57. Denise says:

    Well, I know of at least one other kid he could have had. My model friend was living in LA in the early 90s and was friends with a model from that era who didn’t become huge but was known if you followed modelling (she went on to do something else but it would give her identity away). She was dating Anthony for a short time, got pregnant and had an abortion because she couldn’t continue working if she kept it, especially considering the type of look that was popular at the time. He sent her a card that said ‘Get well soon, you big baboon’. Complete with picture of a baboon.

    • anythingyouwantittobe says:

      Oh my… I’m scratching my head trying to figure out the intention behind this sentiment.

  58. embee says:

    They can go on dates to Chuck e cheese or Justin Bieber. He looks like he’s living under the bridge. Dresses a bit sloppy

  59. Frank says:

    I don’t even know who he is and no I won’t waste time googling him.

  60. BlackBetty says:

    Why do they look related? Ewww. Let’s face it they wouldn’t be together if he was just Average Joe, with no fame.

  61. Andrea says:

    I dated a 36 year old divorcee when I was 25. My friends gave me SUCH a hard time about it, I didn’t see the big deal. He was amazing in bed. However, he had major issues given that his wife cheated on him and very quickly it showed that he had issues with me having male friends and acting feminine in any way (nail polish, makeup etc basically anything attracting a man). We broke up after 3 or 4 months (I intiated it) and he went on to marry a very tomboy looking woman who never looks feminine. I have always had a thing for older men though and at 33, I wouldn’t be opposed to dating a 45-50 year old (my current bf is 37). I generally date men 4 or 5 years older or younger than me though. A lot of women I am friends with in their 40’s want 20 year olds though and I just don’t get it. Men are very immature(I have found), why date someone so young?

    As for AK, he prefers younger women, MUCH younger women. I have a few friends in late 30’s (men) who always date 22-25 year olds and would probably date younger if they could! They are hung up on looks and thinness and once women get older or have had kids, their weight increases and yeah, my guy friends are shallow in that regard. I doubt either of them would date someone over 140 lbs. I have a girl friend in her 40’s and she is 50-60lbs overweight and she never has any dates. A lot of men are hung up on looks due to advertising in our society I believe. Until we change that, men will continue to want youth, beauty, and thinness.

  62. Misprounced Name Dropper says:

    Such an evolved man.

  63. magpie says:

    @kaiser: You missed some juicy background info. Everly’s mother is Heather Christie who was the inspiration of “she’s just 18”. She later went on to date Joaquin Phoenix (who is now dating that 19 year old). Kiedis is/was?always will be a hardcore heroin addict and lover of young ladies.