Kaley Cuoco is not a feminist: ‘I was never that feminist girl demanding equality’

kaley redbook

Kaley Cuoco spent her Christmas in a hospital, maybe getting a nose job. No, not really. She had some kind of surgery on her nose, something like a deviated septum I guess. She claimed that she hasn’t been able to breathe properly for years, and she blasted the “haters” for saying that she had a Christmas nose job. Just my opinion: she talks openly about her boob job, why wouldn’t she talk openly about a nose job? So, she probably did have real surgery on her nose (and perhaps it will be slightly smaller too). Kaley’s husband Ryan Sweeting was there for her the entire time, because obviously. What else does he have to do?

Anyway, Kaley covers the new issue of Redbook. Can we start calling her Felicity Cuoco? Because she really did Felicity herself with that haircut. In the Redbook piece, Kaley talks about why she’s NOT a feminist (because she’s an idiot?) and why she loves traditional gender roles.

When asked if she’s a feminist: “Is it bad if I say no? It’s not really something I think about. Things are different now, and I know a lot of the work that paved the way for women happened before I was around… I was never that feminist girl demanding equality, but maybe that’s because I’ve never really faced inequality. I cook for Ryan five nights a week: It makes me feel like a housewife; I love that. I know it sounds old-fashioned, but I like the idea of women taking care of their men. I’m so in control of my work that I like coming home and serving him. My mom was like that, so I think it kind of rubbed off.”

Her huge pay increase for TBBT: “All I think about is what it means for my family…and knowing there is security for all of us. My parents spent 16 years hauling my butt to LA for audition after audition. Every day they were helping me learn my lines, dropping me off, waiting for me, picking me up, giving me pep talks when I didn’t get the jobs, taking me to tennis and horseback riding lessons. I remember always hoping I could help take care of them because they took such good care of me. Knowing I’ll be able to just brings tears to my eyes.”

Her boob job in 2004: “I had no boobs! And it really was the best thing ever! I always felt ill-proportioned. My implants made me feel more confident in my body. It wasn’t about trying to be a porn star or wanting to look hot and sexy.”

[From E! News]

She makes me want to bang my head against a wall. These ladies today… there is so much profound stupidity. Maybe I could understand this ditzy “I’ve never thought about it because I’ve never experienced it” explanation from an 18-year-old, but Kaley is 29 years old. She’s old enough to have thought about inequality and experienced inequality firsthand. So, let me explain this to Kaley: you can still be a feminist AND make dinner for your husband. Those two things are not mutually exclusive. If you choose to be barefoot and in the kitchen, that’s fine. Because it’s YOUR CHOICE. Feminism is allowing every woman to make their own family choices, marriage choices, sexual choices, economic choices and more.

kaley2

Photos courtesy of Redbook.

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

185 Responses to “Kaley Cuoco is not a feminist: ‘I was never that feminist girl demanding equality’”

Comments are Closed

We close comments on older posts to fight comment spam.

  1. Jh says:

    Dear, Lord. That hair. What a tragic mistake.

    • **sighs** says:

      +1000

      • Lovielee85 says:

        It’s examples like her hair…and the horribleness of the whole sad mess of that cut with her face shape….reasons I will never rock a pixie!!!! I just know people would be like, ‘what the f were you thinking?!’ Haha The low maintenance part would be AMAZING, but it would just never work on me. Lol It’s alllllll about face shape. I hope she lets it grow out? I’ll give her credit for trying to work it while she has it! Lol

      • Vodkalovesme says:

        Miley Cyrus has a similar face shape and makes the pixie work, but she is gaunt with a round face. Kaley is not gaunt.

    • Rae says:

      Everything about that hair is a no for me

      • Lovielee85 says:

        @vodkalovesme, I don’t think she and Miley have the same face….lol. Everything different! Literally everything. Bone structure and shape totally different…but that’s just me.

    • elo says:

      I don’t like to say she Felicitied herself, Keri Russell is so pretty, I’m going to say she has Gosselined herself after that tragic cut Kate Gosselin gave herself. This girl is beyond stupid, I wonder if she makes the same amount of money as her male costars.

      • Rae says:

        I believe she does. If I remember their contract dispute correctly, she, Johnny Galecki and Jim Parsons were each holding out for $1 million per episode and got it. Which honestly, I didn’t really think was fair. No one gives a shit about Penny.

    • Lucy says:

      Judging by this interview, the hair is the least of her problems. And no, I’m not talking about appearance.

      • cj says:

        U can be a stay at home mom and be feminist,are you not contributing to the family as much if not more.feminism is about women wanting to be validated for their contributionin whatever form.its not less coz I’m female.

      • aemish says:

        We don’t have to be identical to be considered equal. We got the vote, once we get the pay straight, we’re done here. :/

      • fritanga says:

        Disingenuous in the extreme. Cuoco makes about eleventy billion dollars at her job; most women make, at best, 60 to 70 cents to every dollar a man makes. Not her problem, though – she’s not a feminist and she likes to pretend to be a housewife (total BS, btw – she probably has the normal full time house staff and three or four assistants that every other enormously rich American TV star has). Funny how you can do that when you make a fortune.

    • She must have gone in and told the hairdresser…..”what can you do to make me look more like a harried, frumpy mom circa 1984?”

      • QQ says:

        all she needs now is Tina Fey’s Mom Jeans, Patchwork Vest and FUPA, but Lord Isn’t her and her Punchable face halfway There

    • Tiffany :) says:

      I saw a picture of her the other day with her longer layered hair, and I was amazed at how much prettier she looked. I feel bad for her, but it will grow out.

    • Josefa says:

      It’s seriously the most unflattering thing she could’ve gotten. Who the hell told her that was a good idea?!

      • Zwella Ingrid says:

        I know this is all my mind, but it seems like she was funnier/a better actress on TBBT before the haircut. Kind of a Samson thing. She lost her power. I believe she is truly ignorant about being a feminist. Her focus has been elsewhere. You can’t blame a person for what they don’t know. Too bad she was put in the position to comment on it. Hopefully she will learn more and have a better reply in the future. I still like her, but I want her hair back.

    • tmbg says:

      And it’s haircuts like those that land you on Redbook rather than InStyle.

      One of those characters from Melrose Place had a similar look back in the 90s.

    • Tanguerita says:

      Oh well, we can see it this way – now she looks as dumb as she sounds.

    • JT says:

      It makes her look like a soccer mom trying to be hip

  2. Tiffany27 says:

    This is not surprising.

  3. Jules says:

    I’m so over these celebrity twits. Especially the ones that have to go buy a husband.

    • bettyrose says:

      “go buy a husband” SNORT

    • Senaber says:

      +10000000000000. You’re my favorite.

    • Ag says:

      now, THAT’S feminism – being financially independent enough to be able to buy a man of your very own. lol

      • bettyrose says:

        Hey – I wouldn’t even hate on her for that if she was all “yeah, I’m a badass money magnet and found me a sweet house husband who loves to garden.” But why does it always have to come down to making dinner as some grand symbol of deference? Whoever’s feeling least lazy that day makes the meals in my home.

      • mayamae says:

        Kelly Ripa plays on this as well. I’ve heard her say that she’s simply passing the time until her husband makes it big and she can quit. It’s very irritating, and it’s never going to happen. It’s a way to stroke his ego because she’s the bigger celebrity and the primary bread winner.

      • bettyrose says:

        @Mayamae – After the Kelly Rippa thread the other day, I put her show on for a sec this morning (on vacation). It’s shocking how skinny she is. I mean, I’m used to seeing very thin women on tv but somehow being on tv makes them look less skeletal. Not so in her case. I shudder to think what forces, internal or external, would push a woman to do that to herself.

    • Alicia says:

      You’re the best.

      When she dated Johnny Galecki she was fine (maybe because he’s very low-key and shuns attention), but ever since then it seems like she’s become a major attention whore (see the Henry Cavill debacle).

      I loathe these women who live a feminist lifestyle and profit off the women who did the hard work to pave the way for them then turn around and say they aren’t a feminist.

      • Jules says:

        Thank you. I’m one of those women who fought for her. I was a car designer in the 1980’s when women in the field could be counted on one hand. I also like to cook for my husband. And Johnny Galecki is too good for her.

      • Lahdidahbaby says:

        “I loathe these women who live a feminist lifestyle and profit off the women who did the hard work to pave the way for them then turn around and say they aren’t a feminist.”:

        Thank you for saying it so clearly & succinctly. Those “I’m not a feminist, but…” Idiots make me sick, especially when they’re reaping the benefits of the work that was done before they came along.

      • Lucy2 says:

        Well said, Alicia. The first I thought maybe it wasn’t so bad because she at least acknowledged that others had worked at it before her, but actually I think that makes it even worse. It’s a willingness to be ignorant.

      • ichsi says:

        All of the above. Also there is a difference between “cooking for someone”, “taking care of someone” and “serving”. WTF?!

        Although, I have to say, this Sweeting person got himself the fratboy dream package. A rich girl with a boob job that will bring him his sandwich anytime he asks for it.

    • Detritus says:

      This one, Leanne, and Tori Spelling.

      This game is fun, who else?

    • Anne tommy says:

      ” is it bad if i say no?” Yep Kaley it’s bad.

  4. Joy says:

    I love short hair. I wish I could have it, but with my texture and curls, I would have an Orphan Annie (circa the old movie) vibe. Having said that……chica did NOT need to cut that hair off. It doesn’t suit her face at all. AT. ALL.

    • Wilma says:

      But IMO longer hair didn’t suit her face either. I prefer this I think.

      • Amy says:

        I do too, I’m not sure why everyone’s dogging her for it when she looks SO much better. Seriously she looked so basic before with long hair.

      • Anony says:

        No she definitely looked better with longer hair IMO

      • Mauibound says:

        I love her pixie. I guess I’m one of the few but I think it’s adorable

      • Happyhat says:

        Yeah… I’m liking her hair. The clothes and those earings, those are the aging factors. I think she looks awesome in the second picture with the hat.

    • qwerty says:

      @Amy
      She still does. She has a basic face, no matter what hairdo she wears she’s gonna look basic.

      • shixappeal says:

        That is not a pixie. I rocked one for at least two years and that is at best a short haircut. I think she looks good. I think her show is crap, but when one makes a million an episode good on ya.

  5. mia25 says:

    Here we go again….

  6. Kdlaf says:

    Even though her response is ignorant, why do people keep asking this in interviews?? Its getting old!

  7. BengalCat2000 says:

    Maybe she doesn’t “get” feminism because she makes so much money being objectified on that terrible show.

    • Kiddo says:

      Yeah, she plays to the hot girl in a circle of guys.

    • K says:

      I was just going to say…. Maybe she should more closely examine the underlying gendered assumptions that make possible a character like Penny

      • perplexed says:

        Penny isn’t dumb though. She’s not book smart, but she has greater street smarts than the guys on the show. The character’s emotional intelligence is greater than that of the science geeks on the show. Penny is a hot girl, but the dynamic between her and the men isn’t really stereotypical.

        There are also smart women scientists on the show. Penny provides a different facet of “smart” than what the scientists provide.

      • Lilacflowers says:

        Melissa Rauch is actually hotter but we’re not supposed to notice.

      • Kitten says:

        @perplexed-
        Really though? I’ve only seen the show a few times and all I saw was some nerdy dude sexually harassing the hot chick non-stop, then getting all butt-hurt and characterizing her as an *Angry Woman* when she didn’t reciprocate.

        To be fair to you, it might be easier to ignore if you enjoy the show.
        Personally, I find it humorless and low-brow so maybe I’m more open to the criticisms.

      • perplexed says:

        The show is kind of low-brow, but I do think Penny is more complicated than being just a “hot girl.”

        I don’t think the nerdy guys are really supposed to be considered evolved outside of the science classroom. The one that was sexually harassing her is an idiot, but I think that’s how we’re suppose to view him — I don’t think were actually supposed to think he’s great (although I think he later changes). Penny, in that way, sort of helps the men grow as people. She brings a certain level of smarts and nuance that they lack in a real-world context. I think that may be the point of her character rather than being conventionally hot, although she is that too, but the character kind of subverts the preconceived notions of what her character is believed to represent which tend to run more along gendered assumptions rather than how she’s actually written. What people have assumed about Penny without actually watching the show in full is gendered but I don’t think that’s how she’s actually portrayed on the show.

        Do I think the show is intellectually brilliant? No. Do I think it’s flawless? No? Do I think the characterizations are extremely well-rounded? Not necessarily. But I think people’s assumptions about Penny are what is gendered more than anything else. I think we’re supposed to view the nerdy guys on the show as being considered idiotic in a real-world context, outside of their fields where they excel.

        I think criticisms of the show as a whole make sense – but I really don’t think Penny fits a one-dimensional stereotype. I don’t think pointing that out is necessarily being averse to criticism of the show, but pointing that she’s a bit more fully realized than people give her credit for being. That failure to give her credit for being more than hot seems kind of gendered to me. That she’s not stereotypically just the hot girl is probably why she works as a character, and that’s also probably why the show has gone on for so long — she’s kind of a straight man to the nerdy, smart guys’ real-world stupidity.

      • Kitten says:

        I just didn’t see anything sophisticated about the humor in that show, so it’s really hard for me to believe that there was a lot of thought and intention into how the Penny character was drawn up.

        To me, she seems infantile and one-dimensional, serving only as a plot device for the more interesting male characters who (surprise!) get the funnier lines, and eye candy for the male audience.

        Even Amy, who is intelligent and more accomplished, is seen as the dowdy and unattractive one, while all the dudes lust over the pretty-so-she-must-be-dumb-right? blonde Penny. It’s not only sexist, it’s uninspired and pretty lame when you think about it.
        It also perpetuates a lot of dumb stereotypes about men-they’re superficial and lustful, even pretty disrespectful at times.

        The whole show is basically a bunch of tired stereotypes, in my opinion.

      • perplexed says:

        I have no idea if any thought was put into how Penny was thought up either, but I think the development of the character has from the beginning been that of having a real-world saviness. She’s not Chrissie from Three’s Company. Maybe that Penny has evolved from the beginning in more of a regular person kind of way rather than overtly dumb might be a credit to Kaley Cuoco who I think replaced some other actress in the pilot and whose interpretation might have been more stereotypically dumb.

        I do think Amy is dowdy, but I think that has more to do with Miayim Bialik’s stance that she dress modestly at all times for religious reasons. The character could have evolved a different way if played by someone else. Priya, the lawyer, was a combination of hot and smart. The men are all dowdied up too, though. In real life, the actors are better-looking than the characters they play, including shockingly icky nerdy guy who was sexually harassing Penny. Very rarely do you see a hot guy who is a scientist on that show. I see that as more of a stereotype about science and scientists than scientists — that one may have to look or dress a certain way to fit into or be taken seriously in academics (or any other similarly intellectually-minded field), which does seem true to real life.

        I wouldn’t characterize The Big Bang Theory as sophisticated, but I don’t think that means that the portrayals of gender are stuck in one space either. Friends wasn’t sophisticated, but it wasn’t static in terms of characterization either.

      • TeaAndSympathy says:

        Kitten and Perplexed: THANNK. YOU.

        THIS is why I love coming on here.

    • Kitten says:

      This completely.

      • K says:

        I think that you make great points – and to be fair I haven’t seen the show in years. However, I still find it somewhat problematic that men are automatically assiigned academic/financial intelligence, whereas the “hot girl” can only seem to achieve emotional intelligence.

      • perplexed says:

        I think the character is now moving towards having a career (in pharmaceuticals?). The acting career seems to be dead now. There are women scientists on the show, and the horrible nerdy guy’s wife seems to have both academic/financial intelligence and emotional intelligence. She’s not in the stereotypical Maxim sense, but I think she’d most likely be considered pretty. I think it’s difficult for any character, man or woman, to have everything embodied in one form, especially on a comedy where the humour is built on social interactions. Every character on that show has flaws, especially the super-genius Sheldon, who seems to have some kind of disorder rather than simply lacking emotional intelligence because he’s male.

        I tend to think Penny wound up lacking financial security not because she’s a hot girl, but because she chose acting as a profession. The other female characters on the show have been shown to have careers and are quite savvy — and some like the Indian guy’s sister have been considered hot.

      • Kitten says:

        Yeah I mean…I agree that it might be reaching to look for some sort of social responsibility in a network television sitcom, but it has happened before.
        From Mary Richards on The Mary Tyler Moore Show to Liz Lemon on 30 Rock, accomplished and multi-faceted leading female characters DO exits in the comedic realm. In the end, I just don’t see anything really redeemable about BBT, particularly when there are funnier shows out there that showcase women in a more positive light.
        *shrugs*

      • perplexed says:

        Yeah, it’s happened before in other sitcoms, but I don’t think sitcoms like The Big Bang Theory have ever claimed to be in the same vein as The Mary Tyler Moore. If the show did, that would be weird, but since they haven’t I’ve never felt obliged to hold it up to a certain standard for exceeding the limits of gender portrayals, although I do think the show deviates from gender stereotypes a bit (either accidentally or otherwise). I think the stereotypes on that show have more to do with science nerds and geeks. I doubt all nerds and geeks in real life are that socially off.

        I do find a show like Two and a Half Men, which I think has the same executive producer, to be much worse in terms of low brow humour.

      • Zwella Ingrid says:

        @perplexed is right on in her analysis of Penny’s character on the show. You can’t really comment (in all fairness) without having watched the show on a regular basis. A few episodes here and there doesn’t tell the story.

      • Kitten says:

        @Zwella-I’m not the only person that has brought this up though. It’s been a consistent criticism of the show since its inception–that the female characters are poorly drawn sexist stereotypes

        You don’t have to agree with me, but there’s no point in insisting when my opinion on the matter isn’t going to change. It’s a crappy show with crappier characters.

      • Korra says:

        @perplexed I agree. The show’s not the greatest in terms of gender equality, but it’s still not as bad as people make it out to be.

        @kitten I realize that that criticism of the show is quite popular, but I’m never fully satisfied by that. I’ve seen quite a few of the episodes and I don’t think that the women are portrayed as dumb at all. In fact, everyone has their moments of stupidity. Yes, they seem to often represent stereotypes and the show has not been as funny as season 1, but the women often make jokes at the expense of the guys and are often given funny things to say. On top of that they have a really positive developed friendship (the women) where they hang out and talk on a frequent basis and they stick up for one another. I doubt their conversations would pass the Bechdel test in the majority of episodes though. The show can definitely be problematic in how it portrays women. For instance, the one brilliant female physicist was also a sex crazed maniac. Barf. There is definitely room for criticism. But the show has provided women as being as capable, smart, and informed and as developed as any characters on tv.

      • perplexed says:

        I’ve seen the criticism of the show, but I always wind up disagreeing with how the conclusions are drawn. For instance, Penny is always stated to be dumb, but I’ve never understood why. She’s not a STEM scientist, but she’s not dumb either. She’s a person of regular intelligence who chose the notoriously difficult profession of acting to break into, not a bimbo.

        I do think Amy and Sheldon’s relationship subverts gender stereotypes a bit. Sheldon is asexual, which means he doesn’t want to have sex. Amy tends to pressure Sheldon for sex. Usually that dynamic plays out the other way around on tv shows. Of course, if a guy was doing what Amy was doing, everyone would be shouting from the rooftops how awful he is (and rightly so). I don’t know if it’s so much about changing people’s opinions but providing evidence that refutes the conclusion drawn. Disliking the show is one thing, but the evidence for why Penny is hot, thus dumb by default because everyone thinks she’s hot, always strikes me as kind of flimsy. Penny is also not the only female character on the show. The females all have different personalities, but somehow come together to share warm friendships with each other.

      • max9 says:

        Kitten, I agree with you completely, and I watch the show regularly, out of a habit now, it’s not even funny any more and I think I’m finally going to quit watching.
        The show is one huge stereotype, men being smart, smart men being socially incapacitated, the only supposedly hot girl stupid, and other two smart women not so good looking (to put it nicely). Even worse is the fact that neither of women scientists is actually ugly, but of course it’s the stereotype of smart women not caring as much about looks as not so smart women (not true, of course, there are all kinds of women around the world) so we are only supposed to see stupid girl how hot she is.
        I seriously doubt that creators of such shows put as much thought into characters and their depth as Perplexed does (altough, I appreciate her/his line of reasoning), and I think they are what they are – shallow stereotypes (the characters).

      • TeaAndSympathy says:

        Thank you, Kitten and Perplexed! THANNK. YOU.

        The gossip is…meh. Commentary like this is why I love coming on here.

  8. Angela says:

    Her answer on the feminist thing is fine to me. She acknowledges that there is inequality, that feminists before her blazed a trail that made it easier for her, but that she doesn’t personally identify with the term. I don’t care for her “I love cooking for my husband!” explanation, but she’s not shading feminism, just explaining her approach.

    I’m saying this as a lifelong feminist: not every woman needs to be a feminist. No one part of being a woman should be compulsory. She is not volunteering an ignorant opinion. She was asked if she identified with the term, and gave an honest if inarticulate answer. It’s her business. This whole feminism-as-a-gotcha-question-in-celebrity-profiles is tiring and sexist. It encourages feminists to spend energy on trivialities (like whether rich celebrities identify with a political movement) over actually important feminist topics (like police violence, transgender rights, health care, or a million other things). I love discussing celebrities, don’t get me wrong, but when we’re talking about someone with an frivolous public persona, I’m more interested in how sketchy her husband is and less interested in her shallow views on feminism.

    Also, it seems like she’s gotten a lot more press and success since her haircut, so I don’t see any Felicity situation.

    • perplexed says:

      I understood her answer the same way.

    • Senaber says:

      On one hand, I see your point. On the other, I appreciate anything that gets the discussion of feminism out in the open. I think all the men should be asked the same question as well.

      • Angela says:

        Ten years ago, I was an outspoken teenage feminist, and I was bullied for speaking my mind (other reasons, too, but my feminism was definitely among them). Feminism was much more vilified then. Now it’s become a trendy, popular thing. I think that’s great, I really and truly do. It makes me happy that almost all my friends and favorite celebrities these days identify as feminist, and that the term has become such a positive thing that one can speak of openly without fear of persecution. But feminism, for me at least, has been very important to my personal development. I really don’t like seeing something so intimate turned into an obligation, something women have to say in order to avoid negative press.

        If Kaley were saying “oh, feminists are man haters, and I love men!”, or “everything is equal, feminists are whiny!” Then yeah, I would want to school her. But she’s not. She’s respectfully stating her point of view, and since she gave respect to the topic, I want to respect her answer. Maybe she’ll come to feminism later.

      • CH2 says:

        Angela, you’re sadly mistaken if you think feminist don’t get bullied or vilified now… I didn’t start out disliking men as a feminist but after seeing their myriad disgusting responses to my labeling myself as such, I’m beginning to :-/

    • BendyWindy says:

      ITA.

    • solanaceae (Nighty) says:

      I’m also fine with her answer… We don’t have to have the same values, all of us… At least she’s not saying she’s not feminist because she loves men… she’s saying it because she never felt the inequality under her own skin… That’s fine…

      • Kitten says:

        Yeah I get where you guys are coming from but thank god not everyone thinks like her.
        Her stance doesn’t change the fact that feminism is still necessary–Cuoco casually casting it aside because she’s never dealt with inequality is a pretty self-centered viewpoint at the end of the day.

        As a white chick, I’ve never personally experienced racism, but I still care greatly about how oppression, stereotypes, and prejudice affect PoC and minorities.
        It doesn’t have to affect me directly for me to care or to feel responsible for changing things in any small way that I can.

      • Angela says:

        I don’t think she was casual about it. One reason I’m defending her is because this is not tone-deaf. Kaley doesn’t strike me as particularly bright, but she does have a certain savvy. I think she saw the backlash to many women who poo-poo’d feminism and wisely took the time to craft an answer that speaks to her honest personal beliefs while showing respect to feminism and feminists. Again, I don’t think she has a lot of great insight, but it’s a difficult question, and if she’s going to say she’s not a feminist, then I appreciate her taking the time to not trash it. A lot of celebrities are not good at that.

      • Kitten says:

        To me, saying “it’s not really something I think about” is the definition of casual. It’s pretty dismissive, don’t you think? It’s good that she acknowledged that women before her paved the way but she’s still completely disregarding the need for Third World Feminism by being so cavalier.

        But I guess your point holds true that when we have the bar set so low by Evangeline Lilly and the like, Cuoco comes across as slightly better than most.

        I don’t know. I wish interviewers would stop asking women who couldn’t care less about feminism what they think about feminism. They never add anything insightful or interesting to the conversation and always end with “I enjoy cooking and cleaning for my man” as if that has any relevance in the context of modern-day feminism.

      • perplexed says:

        Do any celebrities really talk about Third-World feminism though? Most of them answer the question within their privileged bubble – how feminism benefits or not benefits them. I don’t think any of them have answered the question in a way that addresses the concerns of women outside of North America. Someone like Lena Dunham only really talks about feminism in terms of how it relates to her more than anybody else. I don’t think people in Third World Country X are really worrying about how Lena Dunham takes it upon herself in every episode of Girls to subvert certain norms about the Western body. They have other things to think about!

      • Kitten says:

        Not enough of them do care about Third World Feminism, that is true.

        Maisie Williams recently brought it up by insinuating that First World Feminism is less relevant. Actresses like Laverne Cox advocating for transgendered women is an example of bringing women who are often excluded from feminism to the forefront of the discussion.
        Oprah, Angelina Jolie-even though they might not be talking about it, are helping disadvantaged women in third world countries with their philanthropic efforts.

        Come to think of it, I’d rather hear Jolie, Oprah or Cox’s thoughts about feminism over Caley Cuoco’s any day. But they don’t get asked about it, because the interviewer knows they won’t provide the idiotic soundbites.

    • Marigold says:

      Here’s the problem-that I’ve seen too many times-with your explanation-it’s all about word play. I don’t care if she doesn’t identify with the word but fact is-she probably is a feminist. If you were to ask her if she wants equality for women, which is feminism in a nutshell, she’d likely say yes. People getting caught up on the word and thinking they can change the definition is tiring. Her thinking “I cook for my husband so I guess I’m not a feminist” is exhausting. It’s a disservice. It’s not about identifying with the word, it’s about identifying with the principles, which I bet she does. She just doesn’t know because she’s ignorant. And you’re right-she’s not articulate either. I’m starting to think journalists are just effing with their subjects by asking this so we can weed out the idiots. In a few years, I’m sure she’ll be singing from the rooftops about how unfair Hollywood is to females. Would it kill her to have a little foresight mixed in with the hindsight she mentions here?

      • Angela says:

        I think that feminism is a lot more complex than “equality for women”, personally. I also think that people should be able to identify freely with whatever term or label resonates with them. For example, a lot of women of color and trans women believe in equality for women but reject the feminist label because of the long, often violent history of racism and transphobia in the feminist movement, and I think they are perfectly entitled to do so. That’s not Kaley’s situation, but it’s a big part of why I don’t think anyone is automatically a feminist just because they believe in basic equality for all people. For me, believing in equality for all people is a basic requirement for being a decent human being. Being a feminist is a little more involved, IMO.

      • Marigold says:

        Of course it’s a lot more complex than that, hence my use of the word “nutshell.” Get more complex with “Penny” here and I STILL think she’d identify with feminism. And you bring it back around to word play-some assholes changed the definition of feminism and so a group doesn’t like the word. That’s unfortunate but that’s NOT the case with this girl so she doesn’t get a pass for not identifying with the word. OR the principles-which is what she’s doing here, blatantly, and tha should be more concerning. If she had said “feminism has a very colored history but I do appreciate the principles,” I might throw her a bone on eschewing the word but that’s also not what happened here. You want to give her a pass, and think you’re entitled to because you’re aware of history or whatever. Fine. I think she’s ignorant and didn’t earn any pass. She has deemed feminism one thing (a thing that it is not) and thinks her actions with her husband means she can’t label herself that thing. If you think anyone has avoided the complexities of feminism and what it truly means, you should think that about her-who has a wide audience to misinform.

      • Zwella Ingrid says:

        I really don’t give a crap what a celebrity has to say about feminism. I have respect for those who provide actual, real help to women, like Jolie. Anyone can talk. Celebrate those who provide real help.

    • OhDear says:

      Yeah, I don’t agree with her, but she tried to be respectful.

  9. bettyrose says:

    I wrote a paper in college (early 90s) arguing that we live in a post-feminist world, and at 19 I truly believed that. At 29, I knew better.

  10. db says:

    Dear god, what a twit.

  11. irishserra says:

    She reminds me a little of Miley Cyrus.

    You’d think with all of the stupid comments from the young starlets these days regarding the issue of equality and subsequent backlash she’d have learned. Just goes to show that most of them have their heads up their own butts, in their own privileged insular worlds.

  12. Anon33 says:

    I am so goddamn sick of these idiots. If it wasn’t for feminism YOU WOULDNT HAVE A CAREER.
    Take a seat you dumbass. Jesus I can’t with these morons anymore…

    • Angela says:

      Yeah, that’s exactly what she says: she wouldn’t have this career if not for feminism, but she doesn’t personally identify with the term.

      • Kitten says:

        She doesn’t identify with men and women being seen as equals?
        Odd…

        Although as someone mentioned above, maybe if she identified as a feminist then she would have to confront the embarassing gender stereotypes that BBT promotes.

        Perhaps ignorance is bliss in her case.

    • Anon33 says:

      IMO you can’t acknowlege that very important FACT-and then turn right around and say, but it doesn’t really apply to you or affect your life. You just admitted that it did/does. And you can’t raise the issue of WOC or transgendered people disagreeing with feminism (in this instance-in no way am I sayng that those aren’t real important problems within our community) bc guess what? Kaley isn’t one of them, and I seriously doubt that she even considera any of those issues when being asked these questions. She is the exact person that white middle class feminism was supposed to benefit-and it did. For her to discount that FACT is hypocritical.

  13. Ellen says:

    Have no fear, Kaley is about 5 years too young to realize the spectacular inequality in Hollywood that is about to hit her. Her male co-workers with talent can work well into their 60s-70’s. She is 3 years from playing the young divorced mom in Lifetime movies and 5 years from having to play the mom of a teenager with a husband who is 15 years older than she is on a tv sitcom. And in 10 years, the wonderful world of auditioning for an infomercial.

    As a mentor to many young women in their 20s in business school is that they don’t realize the subtle stuff. Yes, you’re a VP, he’s a VP. One of you manages a revenue line. One of you is in HR. Guess which one? And guess what, all VP salaries are not equal. The surfaces can look equal but tend to be very different if you lift the rocks.

    and when we stay home to take care of the kids, well, then comes the non stop competition on who’s a better mommy (organic handmade babyfood anyone). We get destroyed from within and without. Gotta get better at this.

    • BooBooLaRue says:

      Very. Well. Said.

    • Connie says:

      This is depressing but very true, unfortunately.

    • bettyrose says:

      ^^^ All of this. She’s the cool girl now and assumes she always will be. Thanks to feminism, young actresses get an extra 5-10 years before being relegated to matronly supporting roles, but the battle is far from over.

    • Joy says:

      When you said Lifetime it really hit me, damn, she’s right. Somebody is going to be stealing her baby, cheating on her, stalking her, or all of the above ASAP!

    • Pandy says:

      LOVE your response Ellen. And of course, you are right about her career trajectory and right again about the VP situation. I saw something about a big raise for TBBT – wonder if she’s earning the same as the “boys” or earning 75 cents for every dollar they earn? But feminism wouldn’t contribute to that -no doubt she’d credit her agent.

    • Anony says:

      Bravo about the VP comments. As someone who works in the corporate world you don’t see it at first but the more you look the more you find…

    • Caz says:

      Totally agree. I’m happy she has lucked it with BBT – it will be her only mega pay day. She may be well cast as Penny. Doesnt have depth of skill to believably play a wider range of characters. She’s Jessica Alba/Biel not Rachel McAdams, Rachel Weisz or Cameron Diaz.

      I work for a global pharma company and there are a lot of women in super senior roles all along the hierarchy. The boys club/jobs for the blokes is slowly diminishing.

    • M says:

      I agree with your statement!

    • MrsNix says:

      Bam. You nailed it here.

  14. perplexed says:

    I don’t know what to think of her answer. She does sound somewhat uneducated on the issue, but she also phrased her answer in a way that I would just respectfully disagree with her rather than get all up in arms about it. She didn’t phrase her answer in a combative way so maybe that’s why I’m having the response I’m having. She doesn’t sound smart, but she doesn’t sound painfully dumb either like other actresses who have said they don’t identify as feminist either. She sounds somewhat self-aware that she’s been more privileged than most in the early part of her life which she explains informs her current stance. I’m so confused. Maybe it’s hard for me to dislike her.

    • Angela says:

      Exactly! I don’t agree with her about feminism, but she’s not saying anything untrue or disrespectful. Feminism isn’t about obligating every single woman in the world to be feminist. It’s about finding justice and protection and equality for all people.

  15. Talie says:

    She’s had a very charmed career, but she’s allowed to fly under the radar because it’s primarily been on TV and people still care more about movie stars.

  16. Bess says:

    That stupid show has been on for several years. Why does it feel like the celebrity media has been trying to make this Kelly chick happen for the last two or so years?

    • PunkyMomma says:

      @Bess – my thoughts exactly. Her PR has been trying to make her “happen” for the past couple of years. Henry Cavill anyone?

      Note to Kaley: you’ve hit the jackpot, stop trying and continue to be grateful. You should be – any attractive actress could have landed The part of Penny.

    • Jessica says:

      Because the show’s going to end sometime in the next few years and she still hasn’t broken out. Not even one mildly successful movie and almost zero name recognition prior to the Cavill thing, despite being on one of the most-watched shows in the world.

      When BBT ends she’ll be lucky to get any work at all, and she’s still not famous enough to just be a celebrity doing the lifestyle thing a la Jessica Alba. If she wants to do something other than roll around in her BBT money for the next 50 years she needs to make a name for herself real soon, hence the big PR push over the last couple of years.

    • Bridget says:

      Because she’s the most attractive face on the most successful show in television. That’s like asking why so much was thrown at Sofia Vergara after Modern Family hit. Kaley’s familiar to millions of eyeballs and is an easy sell.

      • WinterLady says:

        I don’t know, I find Kaley rather bland and only possessing mediocre talent compared to the rest of the cast. Her hot blond with a tight body thing is a dime a dozen in the entertainment biz. I don’t even find her to be all that striking looking, since her mom haircut and the dowdy clothes she is wearing on the show these days.

  17. Gigi says:

    The stupid Feminist comments aside I can’t believe she pulled the financial security for her family card. Um, if your parents were paying for tennis and horseback riding I think they’re going to be ok without you. I doubt they spent their days driving you around only to take a 3rd shift at the bar to make the rent.

    • perplexed says:

      I thought she sounded thoughtful and caring of her parents. They probably weren’t poor, but it’s nice that she’d like to take care of them (I did wonder if they were stage parents though. She said she went to auditions for 16 years so she started off really young? I can’t tell if that’s a decision a kid would make on their own — to go to audition after audition).

    • irishserra says:

      I took it as a declaration of her gratitude and desire to give to her parents rather than their need for her assistance. My parents don’t really need my help financially but my husband and I enjoy giving to them because of how graciously they’ve helped us in tone’s of need.

      That was about the only thing I could identify with in her entire spew of drivel.

    • RobN says:

      Dad is a realtor and mom stayed home. It’s not exactly Hilton money. She’s been talking about the pressure that her family endured to support her career for years. An appreciation of that is a good thing; I’m not sure how you’ve managed to turn it into a shot at her.

  18. Bridget says:

    Who put that picture of Kaley’s mom on the cover?

  19. Ice Queen says:

    🙁 She makes me sad. Obviously she doesn’t understand what feminism stands for, just like many others…

  20. LAK says:

    URGH!!

  21. Ag says:

    “you can still be a feminist AND make dinner for your husband. Those two things are not mutually exclusive. If you choose to be barefoot and in the kitchen, that’s fine. Because it’s YOUR CHOICE. Feminism is allowing every woman to make their own family choices, marriage choices, sexual choices, economic choices and more. ”

    truer words have never been said.

  22. Angela says:

    Well, darlin’, the character you play is from page 26 of the midlife crisis catalogue, so I doubt anyone was wringing their hands wondering.

  23. Angelica says:

    I’ve made it a regular thing to ask people in comfortable with the question of what they think feminism is, and 90+ percent will say something similar to this. It’s not an excuse, certainly not right, but it’s the damn word that’s the problem. I’ve been exhausted just hearing the words “isn’t that where you’re a Butch, flannel-wearing, man-hater?” I’m done, y’all. Done. I’m gonna give most of the people in the world a pass from the fact that they don’t know what it means and move on with the rest of my week. The word ‘feminist’ is temporarily out of order. It’s a big, heaping pile of pitiful…

    • Amy says:

      It’s a rough patch for feminism.

      I think there’s a lot of good work being done but there’s also a lack of communication and reaching out to the younger generation that’s resukted in a large disconnect between generations.

      Sadly a lot of women believe in the core tenants of feminism but disagree on the message or the current actions (I can understand that) so it’s easy to find women who have desires for equality and respect but don’t want to call themselves feminists.

    • CH2 says:

      I think a lot of men have taken over the definition of the word and it’s not pretty…

  24. Angela says:

    P.S. Call us back when you hit 40 and we’ll see if you’re a feminist yet.

  25. Jessica says:

    A lot of feminists will argue very strongly that feminism is not about choice. That yes, you can do whatever you want to do, but that only some choices are feminist choices and that making the ‘wrong’ choices is incompatible with feminism. And of course the ‘wrong’ choices differ greatly depending on which branch of feminism a person identifies with, so whatever you do it will be wrong in some circles. If Kaley enjoys being a house-wife she would definitely come across people in the feminist movement who at best think she’s making un-femininst choices, and at worst think she has no right to call herself a feminist.

    I’m a feminist, but I do wish people would stop pretending feminism is this simple, easy thing. It’s not. You can say it’s about equality, but the definition of equality varies wildly depending on which type of feminism you’re dealing with. What one person thinks is equality is oppression to another. The ideology is messy and difficult and there’s not one single aspect of it that all feminists agree on. So it’s just like every other big social movement. I don’t blame anyone for not wanting to be a part of it.

    • solanaceae (Nighty) says:

      Yes Jessica, that’s so true… It’s such a complex word, because it depends on where you grew up, how one is raised, it’s not so black and white…

    • Amy says:

      Very true.

      I think that’s why some women always default to, “I’m not a feminist but I do believe in equal pay” because those are basic CORE beliefs that used to be the primary focus of feminism.

      Now feminism is very far-reaching and to be absolutely honest has conflicts in its message. That’s another reason some focus on ‘respecting choices’. Because a feminist who believes the patriarchy shapes and controls everything may view make up as the enemy and the product of that system. Put her in a room with a feminist who loves makeup and not good fireworks could go off.

      It’s definitely not cut-and-dry, I think these conflicts are bound to happen and that’s what’s making feminism such a struggle for multiple generations. Then there’s of course feminisms issues with woc and transgender, or western feminism/first world feminism.

      • perplexed says:

        I was looking at the definition of feminism on Wikipedia, and there does seem to be a broad range of theory surrounding the term. I wonder how much of that has affected whether women identify with the term. Nonetheless, I have wondered how feminism came to be associated with man-hating. I’ve never had a problem with the term feminism because I associate it with gender equality, but the fact that so many actresses seem scared of the term has made me curious about feminism came to be associated with one movement over another one, since there seem to be many number of movements listed broadly under the term.

    • max9 says:

      I blame everyone for not wanting to be a part of it. It is a pathetic excuse, because you don’t like the movement you don’t want to be a feminist. I don’t like the Catholic church as an organization, it still won’t stop me from believing in God.
      It doesn’t have to be about the movement or an organization if you don’t like them, but it doesn’t have to stop you from believing in freedom of choice, equal opportunities, right to drive a car, right to have your voice heard (even only via election or something like that), right to be respected as a person, etc…
      Also, you can cook dinner to your husband while doing all that, won’t make you any less of a feminist, nor any more of a woman.

      • Jessica says:

        Sure. But just as you can believe in God but not wish to align yourself with any particular organized religion, you can believe in the basic concept of feminism and not want to call yourself a feminist.

        I call myself a feminist, but I do struggle with that because feminism encompasses so much. I agree with a lot of it, I’m on the fence about a lot of it, I disagree with a fair bit of it and I’m absolutely disgusted by some of it. I feel like I need to add a ton of disclaimers to my claim of being a feminist, and I’m starting to think I should just say I’m not one, because I’d rather people think I’m stupid than think I’m transphobic or racist.

      • carol says:

        jessica — yah but feminism is becoming more mainstream now and I think that people realize that feminists have differing beliefs. When someone tells me they are a feminist, I assume they mean the dictionary definition, not necessarily assuming they are directly connected with the small parts of the movement where bigoted extremists live. I tell people that I’m a feminist so that people know that most feminists are not man haters.

  26. Maggie says:

    Wow, she looks like Paula Deen on the cover. She REALLY needs to grow out the hair or darken it. Such an unfortunate comparison but the eyes see what the eyes see.

  27. Babadook says:

    “Maybe I could understand this ditzy “I’ve never thought about it because I’ve never experienced it” explanation from an 18-year-old, but Kaley is 29 years old”

    Pfft, with the current online feminism trend most 18 year olds have a better understanding of things than her. I’m 22 (in the middle of both ages give or take) and I would have grown up being a feminist. I don’t think it’s about age, I think it’s about education and circumstance and Kaley was a teenager in an era that decided it was “post-feminism”.

    Not defending her…girl needs to get a book and/or a clue.

    • Beth says:

      I am the same age as Kaley and feminism was definitely talked about and gaining traction during my teen years; it was not a post-feminist world. The problem is that Kaley is privileged and made her money being validated by the male opinion. Women like her are often ignorant to oppression or inequality issues the status quo has to deal with. It’s only when something happens to them that they change their tune.

  28. danielle says:

    Kaley! I defended u after Superman gate and u repay me by saying dumb stuff. Stop!

  29. Remember The '80s says:

    You know what I’d like to see these idiot reporters asking female celebrities?
    “How do you reconcile your incredible fortune to be able to do whatever you want, live however you want when there are women and young girls in the Middle East who are getting raped repeatedly every single day as sexual slaves?”

    Now, from that perspective, how do you define feminism?

  30. Miss M says:

    She was never a feminist… Why did she negotiate to have the same salary (without deserving ) that her 2 male co-stars were getting?

    • RobN says:

      You can not be comfortable with a label but still understand the tactic of negotiating as a united front.

      • Miss M says:

        But she would never have a United front, if feminism didn’t exist.

      • Jackie Jormp Jomp says:

        No, no, there is no merit to the “I eschew just the label” argument, “because feminism means I have that right.”
        Feminism doesn’t give you the power to make words mean whatever you want. You don’t want to say you’re a feminist because you’re afraid boys won’t like you, is how that statement reads to me.

      • RobN says:

        Miss M, that’s not true. Feminism or not, people have always had the ability to team up, to decide what is in their mutual interest. Men and women have done it since the dawn of time.

  31. Suzy from Ontario says:

    Again, these young girls don’t understand feminism and the freedom they now enjoy because of women in the past who have fought for their rights. Do these young women really want to be thought of as just property? Having no right to vote? Not being able to attend higher educational institutions, or if they do get in, constantly having their intelligence and competence ridiculed because they are thought to be so inferior to men in all ways? What about being raped by their husbands? It’s okay, right? Because he “owns” her. And it’s okay to pay women next to nothing for work, even if they do the same job as men? Gee…I wonder if she’s willing to get paid a pittance on her tv show compared to all the male actors? Same job. If she doesn’t care about equal pay for equal work stuff, or women being thought of as equal in ability and competence, etc. then I guess it would be okay. I hate when people discount feminism while enjoying the benefits of incredibly hard battles that many women fought for in the past so they could enjoy those benefits. Feminism is not about behaving in a masculine way or being against femininity, it’s about being acknowledged as an actual individual with their own rights and equal opportunities to men.

  32. kri says:

    There is no excuse for a woman to say she is not ” a feminist”. There is only one reason a woman would say this. That reason would be that she is a f&cking idiot. Hello, reason. Oh my god, she is dumb as sh*t. Hey, Bad Hair, you didn’t mind being a feminist when you scored that huge contract for yourself, did you? You like being “in control” of you “work” right? well, how did you get to that point? Cause you had some power and influence(god knows why) in the TV game and you used it…I just can’t stand people who say they are not feminists. Sorry for the rant-that was my masculine side taking over. Must take off my shoes and bake a pie while saying an Our Father”. (No Hail Mary’s-He doesn’t like em)

  33. katy says:

    So, because inequality never affected you, a privileged, rich white girl who is paid absurd amounts of money for the shittiest show I have ever had the displeasure of suffering through, equality totally exists and we shouldn’t worry about it at all because, guys, SHE’S okay.

    Sometimes, even though I am a woman and I fight for equality and I donate my time and money to feminist and woman-centric causes, I hate women. I pray for the stupidity to end, but women like this really make me question even continuing to fight for women’s rights in general because what’s the point if you’re being bad mouthed all the time? Pushed aside and basically thought of as shrill harpies who are just on their period or something?

    I really think I’m done with advocating for women’s rights, guys. No use, the population is the dumbest it’s ever been, and it’s only going to become more diluted with stupidity and women are more okay with losing their rights and everything that was fought for that is slowly being chipped away.

    • Ginger says:

      Oh thank you! I was beginning to think I was the only one who did not like that show. Everyone tries to tell me how funny it is all the time. I just squint and reply “Good for you. I’m glad you like it.”

      And I agree with you about Women’s rights. It does seem like the more vocal you are the more people try and tell you to take a seat and shut up. But I’ve never had a problem with being vocal about what I believe in so keep your head up Katy! There are those who are with you.

  34. jenn12 says:

    She’s into the traditional roles and yet her husband makes no money?

  35. perplexed says:

    I wonder if celebrities would answer differently if you asked them whether they’re 1st wave, 2nd wave or 3rd wave feminists. Maybe that’s where the confusion comes in. The word in it’s most basic dictionary form is simple to understand, but when you dive into the theory part of it where abstraction takes over I do think the word becomes more complicated.

    I wonder if even the suffragettes from the early part of the twentieth century would identify with someone like Lena Dunham. Different people have different goals put under the same umbrella term, and that’s probably where the definition of the word becomes difficult to discern for some celebrities.

  36. misstee says:

    Well in that case I will just relieve you of that multi million pound deal you negotiated for yourself because you know – without Feminism you would NEVER have been allowed in the boardroom with the men co stars to make it would you?

  37. cheryl says:

    I agree with what most of you are saying. There’s also a weird layer of media presentation in all of this. It reminds me of flipping through these magazines as a child in the 70’s and reading he same narrative. Well paid pretty star is just a sweet harmless devoted housewife who admires only her husband and attends to his needs mainly. In an approachable gosh me way. Because that must be what the readers want to believe?

    What decade is this?

  38. scout says:

    “you can still be a feminist AND make dinner for your husband” That’s e-x-a-c-t-l-y what I was thinking too, you said it. It’s a choice and you can or/and able to CHOOSE it! Hurray!

  39. lil says:

    what a horrible example for young women. and men. does she realize their are millions upon millions of women and young girls around the world that are denied basic rights and abused based simply on their gender? her comments are a huge slap in the face for these women.

  40. Chelsea says:

    She looks like Amanda Bynes’ mother on that cover.

  41. ellesbelles says:

    So many people, men and women, get stuck in the feminist discussion without even knowing what it means.

    Making dinner for your husband doesn’t mean you can’t be a feminist. It just means you enjoy making dinner for your husband. Thats pretty much it. They aren’t mutually exclusive

  42. Jenna says:

    I don’t know who this woman is but she has TERRIBLE hair.

  43. Me says:

    Like we should expect these privileged white rich uneducated actresses to contribute anything meaningful to the feminist discussion. Besides being glaring examples of idiocracy.

    • Misprounced Name Dropper says:

      Indeed. I couldn’t care less about what privileged white women have to say about feminism. Regardless of whether they claim to be for it or against it.

  44. LaurieH says:

    I have to say, I am not feminist either – but I have to qualify that. It’s not that I believe women are 2nd class citizens, chattel or otherwise less capable or subservient to men. Quite the opposite, in fact. But I’ve never been inclined to make my life a political statement; to fight for some cause for “women” as if we are some kind of monolithic, homogenous group. For me, that’s even more denigrating to women…stripping away their individuality. Do I know that sexism exists? Yes, of course. I’ve encountered it, but I’ve dealt with on my own terms, earning such a reputation as to stamp it from my daily life. To the extent that it still exists, I think it’s cute. Not in an adorable way, but in a sort of pathetic-that-they-even-try-it way and I deal with it accordingly. It occurred to me – probably in my 30’s – that when you become one in a giant group of demanders and complainers that it’s very easy for people to be dismissive of it. And what appears to be acquiescence and change is really just patronizing out of fear (or rather, just wanting to avoid a hassle). To earn real respect, you have to command it on your own. On your own terms. Making yourself – as a woman, and a human – known to those around you. Not just men, but other women. Change happens when you become a confident force to be reckoned with. When people know who and what they are dealing with. When you dilute yourself in a monolithic group of women, well, your message is equally diluted. And again – what you think is success in getting your way – is really people just trying to get out of your way because they are tired of listening to it. So, in that way, I guess I am a feminist – in that I believe, in my whole heart, that women are individual, different, beautiful, wonderful forces to be reckoned with – and that we all have the strength to assert ourselves. It just takes courage.

    • vauvert says:

      With all respect LaurieH, if a whole group of women did not make it their life mission to be militant and aggressive about it, to go out in public and request their rights, you would not have been able to get the respect you got on your own… because you would have been married off at a young age (assuming you were of the right pleasing appearance, disposition and dowry) to the man your family selected for you, and then the best you could have done was be fortunate enough to have a spouse who did not beat you, rape you, gamble away your inheritance, and if he so desired, divorce you later on, keeping your children, to marry someone younger and prettier.
      If you were not lucky enough to be sufficiently pretty to get a husband, then you would have been the maiden aunt taking unpaid care of some relative’s children, and counting yourself lucky to have a roof over your head. Because it could have been much worse too – being forced into prostitution or a workhouse.
      So yes, I hear what you say – each of us is responsible for making sure we get treated equally on a daily basis, standing up for ourselves and having our own voice heard. But we should not be taking it for granted, and we should also remember that in most of the world women and girls have nowhere near the equality we have. Such as it is. Still not quite that equal overall in terms of earning power or leadership positions or…

      • LaurieH says:

        Well, that’s true and not true. I never said we don’t live in a patriarchal society. We always have and, quite in fact, we still do. But that’s not to say that prior to the Suffragette movement – which I do not diminish – there were not independent, strong, powerful women. In fact, history is littered with them. The women’s movement was about equality with respect to very specific rights – well fought and well won. And “back in the day” (particularly the long ago days) a woman’s looks have WAYYYY less to do with her prospects of marriage than did the wealth of her family and the dowry on offer. But winning “rights” – which as a gender, we have successfully done in this country (though seem blithely uninterested about in other countries besides some rhetorical lip service) is not the same thing as winning respect. Two separate issues; one concerns a change of law (or at least adherence to it). The other concerns a change of heart and attitude (which can not be legislated). That – being the point of my post – is where many women (pardon me) screw up. They mistake winning rights with winning respect. In point of fact, in many ways, it cost us respect…. which is why, these days, we’re having to explain the “no means no” thing. I wish it were different. I wish men could respect women as individualized people entitled to their own choices about their lives, they same way they respect their male friends. But – with sadly not enough exceptions – they don’t. And what they say to you is not what they say in the private company of their male friends. We know that. Which means they are patronizing us. We’ve all heard the stupid sayings: “happy wife, happy life”. What the hell is that?

    • vauvert says:

      I agree with you on the point about earning individual respect. Whether male or female, black or white – the respect we are accorded as a person depends on our attitude and actions, sure. But the point is – as a woman, you would not have the opportunity to earn a fraction of the respect you enjoy nowadays unless our rights had been legislated (short of being a lauded homemaker, or if you were wealthy, an arts patroness/charitable lady.)

      And this is what Kaley misses entirely, as well as all those other misinformed celebs who go around touting their non-feminism. The only reason they are able to stand there and talk about not being a feminist is because a whole lot of women have fought for their right to have an opinion that they can articulate publicly and can have a platform. And it makes me stabby that women actually do not comprehend that. In terms of making progress – hopefully, as a generation of women raising sons (myself one of them) we are helping to educate the next generation of men so that they treat women the way we would like to be treated. It’s still incumbent upon each of us to earn that individual respect,

      As far as history being littered with powerful women, I seriously beg to differ. The only women who held power were a few born to wealth and privilege of rank, or who married/slept with powerful men. They had brains, ambition and often a lack of scruples and managed to parlay their position into political power. But that meant nothing for the millions of women whose lives were bound and ruled by the males in charge.

      I cannot come up with a list of celebrated female scientists, explorers, architects, painters, dramatists, inventors before the 19th century. I doubt that there were no intelligent women before that time… but their voices could not be heard. I personally am very grateful for the gains we have made as women. Whether I am vocal and active about being a feminist is not the point – I just can’t imagine NOT calling myself one. Because if I am not a feminist, then what does that make me, a supporter of a patriarchally dominated society?

  45. Dommy Dearest says:

    Still waiting for a celebrity that knows what feminism actually means. Still waiting on a competent blogger that knows what the word feminism means. 😏

  46. lunchcoma says:

    Aside from being annoying and dumb, I also am fairly skeptical whether her claim about making dinner is true. There’s nothing anti-feminist about cooking, of course, but I don’t really buy that someone shooting a network TV show is home at night in time to put dinner in the oven. I think that may have more to do with the fact that this is a Redbook interview than anything else.

  47. Jessica says:

    Sure Kaley, don’t be a feminist. But then don’t make the same million per episode that Sheldon does. If you want to not be a feminist, then don’t hold out and hold up production to get the big money the men get. Be happy serving under them and never getting the recognition you deserve. But if you do want that mil per episode, same as Sheldon, be proud that you’re a feminist. You can’t have it both ways.

  48. vauvert says:

    So I hope when she heads back to work in 2015 they tell her her salary has been cut in half, then the director/producer slaps her on the bottom, calls her Toots and asks her for a coffee, only make sure only two sugars this time, babe.

  49. Curious Cole says:

    Thank you! I’ve hated her since she ruined the final season of Charmed, and now I have a legitimate reason to boycott this idiot! It also helps explain why I disliked her so thoroughly, I just couldn’t put my finger on it. Of course, give it two days and we’ll have the non-apology tweet whining about how she was misquoted. *rolls eyes*

    • Amy says:

      Thisssssss.

      I don’t watch BBT and I don’t care who’s she’s dating or how shady the guy she’s married to is, but damn did that final season of Charmed suck with the whole stupid sister storyline.

  50. Ginger says:

    OMG! The WHOLE reason she is in control of her own work is BECAUSE of feminism. Stupid, stupid, stupid! I’m joining in on the headbanging.

  51. Lisa says:

    She belongs on WhiteWhine.

  52. Kylie says:

    Not surprising. She has always seemed like a moron and now she has proved it.

  53. Maxine7 says:

    She doesn’t understand her history or how she’s able to earn what she’s earning AT all. Just sad.

    Also I figured out who she looks like with that hair cut. Dye her hair black and she’s a dead ringer for Joyce DeWitt circa Three’s Company days.

  54. gradskooljockey says:

    I really don’t care what the least interesting (and in my opinion, least attractive) chick on TBBT has to say about anything. Seems like a dim bulb.

    Gimme Melissa Rausch or Mayim Bialik any day. Far more pretty/interesting.

  55. Lygeia says:

    At least she followed the statement, “I was never that feminist girl demanding equality,” with the phrase “but maybe that’s because I’ve never really faced inequality.”

    All I have to say is, just wait.

  56. Maureen says:

    I’ve come to the conclusion that many young women and I don’t have the same idea of being a feminist. I am 54, and we couldn’t wear pants to school until I was in junior high. We had to wear dresses or skirts-and this was in a public school system. They don’t understand what they never experienced-I worked in an environment where I was the only woman, and the comments, offhand sexual comments about my body-by single and married men-nowadays I would be making millions in a lawsuit. This was in the 1980’s, when strides had already been made in gender equality.

    The point of feminism is that you have a choice-you can stay at home or you can work in whatever field you choose, and be paid the same wage for equal work. No one way is better-but we have the choice. I am done being frustrated by these kind of comments that seem vapid to me, because they are opinions of the person. Everyone is entitled to their opinion-and she sounds like she is a caretaker, and enjoys cooking for her husband. Good for her! Happily other women have paved the way so the money you make is your own, you are able to own property, and if things don’t work out with your husband, you can actually get a divorce.

  57. Murphy says:

    If she had a nose job the bandage would be over the bridge of her nose right?

  58. Murphy says:

    Oh and just because you like to cook dinner for your husband doesn’t mean you aren’t a feminist.

  59. Miss D says:

    Did you read Daily Mail? DM readers are so ignorant. They don’t know the meaning of this word. They think it’s a bad word. The comments are ALWAYS like that. One reader said: “you can support equality and not be a feminist stop trying to turn people into feminists.” They hate feminists and they don’t even know what it means. Soon those ignorant people will change the meaning of this word. I can’t stand DM.
    When I read Celebitchy, the comments are always positive and when I read DM, the comments are always negative. Sometimes I wonder if WE are wrong. Maybe those DM readers are right.

  60. MrsNix says:

    I don’t know. I really like the hair. I seem to be alone in that, but I love it. I think it finally makes her look like a grownup, and the red hat with the ‘shopped eyes is a great photo.