Last week, we covered the photos of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner reportedly leaving a counseling center together. People Magazine included those photos in several stories about the estranged couple attending counseling, but there was some confusion as to when they were taken. Signs on the building indicate that it was a pediatrician’s office. The Daily Mail has additional photos from that same day which were taken at another location they claim is a therapist’s office.
Regardless of where they were when these photos were taken, People confirmed that these two are in counseling and were spotted outside a session, which prompted speculation that they’re getting back together. TMZ reported that there was no reconciliation happening and that “the damage is already done.” Now People has two follow-up stories all about how they’re definitely not getting back together but are at least getting along. We get it. Here are excerpts from those reports:
“They both seem much happier and relaxed,” a source tells PEOPLE of the couple, who are back together in Los Angeles for the first time since they announced their split on June 30. “They spent the past week enjoying the last days of summer and getting the kids prepared to start school again.”
“It might seem from the outside that they both gave up on their marriage and stopped receiving counseling together, but that’s not who they are,” the source close to the couple says. “They both had an insane summer and probably just had to take a break [from counseling].
“They are both smart when it comes to the kids and will work on putting any conflicts or differences aside,” the source notes. “They were friends before they fell in love, and want to continue being friends now.”
“Jen has really been trying to put all the nanny drama to the side and she is doing well, but there is no way she would ever take Ben back,” the source says, adding that, “as soon as she took her wedding ring off, she acted like a different person…”
[She] has “realized that having some space from Ben is good.”
“There is no reconciliation,” says a source. “They are working with a professional because there are emotions involved and they want to make this transition as easy as possible for their family…
“They are working together and are keeping it amicable,” a source close to the couple also tells PEOPLE. “This is something they have been working on for over a year – and they continue to be strong unit.”
The second source also says they’re choosing to remain friendly for reasons that extend beyond parenting.
“It’s not just for the kids – it’s also for them,” says the source. “They care about each other.”
So I believe the story that these two were already separated but that Affleck’s affair with the blabby nanny is what ultimately prompted Garner to announce. It’s likely that Affleck picked that nanny to force Garner’s hand. At least they’re trying to do things the right way for their kids now.
On Sunday Garner was spotted outside church with her children, which seems to be their second weekend in a row going to church. From what I remember, we haven’t seen her at church in the past, but it’s possible she wasn’t as closely followed by photographers before the news of her divorce broke. (Unlikely, but possible.)
photo credit: FameFlynet
Newsflash. This story is beyond played out.
Agreed. They are getting divorced. Ok move on now. End of it.
But let’s talk about their feelings a little bit more first. Oh and did the nanny get buried, or what? She’s refreshingly MIA.
Mimif–she’s probably getting a celeb makeover..you know, new nose, new boobs, new wardrobe, hair, etc etc…😎
Oh, and cider doughnuts are wonderful..especially with cinnamon sugar coating..
Or she finally got paid.
Cider doughnuts with cinnamon sugar coating fresh out of the fryer are heaven. And it is the season. Labor Day marks the start of cider doughnut season.
I’m pretty sure J Garner reads Celebitchy, and this is her response to all of our speculation.
If she read Celebitchy, she would up her shoe and wardrobe game. And I so badly want to take her hair in hand. She is a gorgeous woman,but she manages to look doughty 90% of the time.
Crumpet wins the internet for “doughty.”
I think “doughty” means “gutsy” (hardy, resolute), which she does look like in photos. Perhaps you meant something along the lines of stout, dumpy or ‘like a doughnut’, in using the word in your sentence about her wardrobe and hair. (-;
@Ally8 I’m pretty sure she meant dowdy, meaning unfashionable
I know, right? I love how their “source” wants for us to know that they worked really hard on the marriage and did not give up on it. As if we cared or needed daily pap photos of different counseling visits to prove this.
Yeah, we get it. And now, we’re all exhausted by this overexposed marriage/divorce, too.
I’m so glad that Jennifer Garner has decided to respect our privacy and carry out her divorce in silence.
Tell me what a cider doughnut is immediately before I reduce myself to eating rum cake for breakfast.
Bitterly disappointing, that’s what. Hoping for sweet and fruity, with a slight tang, it was just an ordinary doughnut. (Did find salvation in Dynamo donuts’ passion fruit doughnut, however.)
You have to get your cider doughnut at an apple orchard. They’re made with cider, (not the apples themselves). The fresher the better. Hot, crunchy outside, moist and melting inside, rolled in cinnamon sugar. Heaven.
What in the hell, how can I have lived over 9 decades on this green earth and never experienced the bitter disappointment of a cider donut?! I feel robbed.
ETA: that sounds so good! Like churros (if you speak Mexican).
Cider donuts are heavenly but as Lilacflowers says you have to get them fresh from an apple orchard.
Fair enough. My first acd experience was on the boardwalk at Ocean City, so while they were hot, they might not have had much apple cider in them. Going apple picking in a few weeks, will keep my eyes peeled (forgive me.)
But it has to be a feng shui apple orchard.
@mimif, yes, like hot churros but cider-y and squirting grease and cinnamon sugar.
LOL @mimif. Blast from the past…
Where, for the love of God, is it autumn? It is going to be 100* (can’t find degrees symbol) here today in Texas. Is this a Boston thing, this autumn of which you speak?
Also, Ben looks positively manic in these photos. It’s a little disturbing, even to me the great Ben-apologist.
It’s definitely changing over to Fall here in the PNW
@Bridget, did I tell you I moved to the peninsula? (I can’t remember sh-t.) I love it but what a hot summer, blech. Really enjoying the cooler evenings and mornings now.
Yep, SDM, with temps in the 90s to near 100 here this week, I’m not feeling fall-like at all yet, and I definitely don’t want anything *hot* to eat!
People also to turn to places like church in a time of trauma. Churches in lower Manhattan were packed after 9/11. And astonishingly (to me), this was commented on in the sermons, as if people needed to be scolded in that moment for not having been regular churchgoers.
Thank you!
I don’t care if I ever see a story about these two again.
I’m with you, Minx.
I’d be more interested in reading her grocery list at the farmers market.
The only thing I like to read about these two two at thalid point are the comments after their articles. People are mentioning cider donuts…that got my attention
mmm, cider doughnuts…now that’s more interesting…
Cider donuts are the best thing to happen to Celebitchy since Benedict Cumberbatch. Benedict Ciderdonut?
Looks like shes letting go of the frump look in those photos. I know shes free to dress how she wants but let go of the act as an “everyday mom” – youre a multi millionare how can afford the best, youre not fooling me. Shes always rubbed me the wrong way – yeah ben is a jerk but she always seemed really calculating, which all celebs are to a degree i guess…
I agree mostly, I was never really fond of her to begin with. The “everyday mom” thing made me roll me eyes until I saw a pap pic of her exposing her ripped old underwear. IDK, it made me smile and reminded of doing laundry as my designated chore growing up. I remember seeing my mom’s underthings and thinking “Oh, so this is what you need for Christmas/your birthday”. A couple of years ago a co-worker was emptying a bed pan in the ICU after coming back from maternity leave. She lost a bunch of weight breastfeeding. Her pants fell off in the middle of a Trauma Bay to show the world and God her ripped “Mom underwear”. She’s really funny and laughed it off. A couple of weeks later I saw that pap pic and thought: Oh, I guess she is a “real mom” type and has other things on her mind. It made me like her more for some reason. Jokes on me if she had planned with her PR team to rip those babies up and show them for image reasons (as some internet comments that I read claimed). LOL. Anything is possible I guess. Still imagine her wearing ripped up underwear everytime I see her pic though.
Does this mean no more coffee runs or runs to the market?
I think Ben got custody of the Farmers Market, so Jen had to switch to the church!
They’ve gone to church before the divorce announcement but I don’t think they regularly attended. More monthly than weekly. I do think that there were problems before the nanny. Jennifer strikes me as the type to do everything possible before getting divorced.
I’m at the point where I want dimples and Wander Dong to just leave us all alone. I do wonder where the Nanny is…I have a feeling she is weeding Gisele’s garden, or something.
I know right? Girl on fire got doused.
Yeah doused with cash.
Kri – just wanted to say that I’m a fan of your font. Such dry wit. Cracks me up every time. 🙂
“weeding Gisele’s garden or something” — you are amazing 🙂
I don’t understand why the constant articles about these two (not picking at you, CB) – obviously Jennifer / Ben, or their PR person/s is selling the stories to keep them in the news, but why? I know Jennifer is shooting a movie at the moment but that can’t be it …?
It’s very odd, especially as they’re not that interesting. They seem happy to have their kids photographed by the paps as part of this too.
I wonder what’s happened to Nanny Christine too … she became one of the most-loathed people for 15 minutes for what, exactly?
when their (especially Jen’s) mediocre acting cannot keep them in the news, they have to resort to silly shticks like this, happened to caught a glimpse of Catch me if you can last night on TV, Jen was in it for 5 minutes as a high priced hooker, my gawd, her acting is terrible.
My theory is thus. Before Nanny it was Jen trying to keep up a facade for appearances and Ben trying to leak info to force her hand. During Nanny Ben was in damage control mode and Jen was trying to help to keep up the facade up for appearances. Now post Nanny Ben seems to be segwaying into a family man image (not buying it for a second Ben), and we still have Jen keeping up a facade for appearances. Are we noticing a pattern?
BACK ON MESSAGE! BACK ON MESSAGE!
That’s what happened. Nanny Christine was given a nice lump sum and a non-disclosure agreement, and Garner took back the reins of the divorce press. She’s a pro at this, even when the nanny tried to divert attention Garner remained mostly unsullied, issuing excellent “wronged wife” tidbits. She’s in control again now, so we’re getting stories (again) about how they are Divorcing the Right Way. Probably why Ben looks so content here. Once again Garner solved his man-baby problems and made him look good. Or at least much better. I’m not sure how much I’m buying of the story, but Garner’s press game is tight.
If he did the nanny just to force Jen’s hand then he’s really the worst scumbag.. doesn’t he know his kids will soon have access to the internet and read those stories? What a douche, it’ll be hard to be friends with him.
I have always thought he threw it in her face ‘consciously’ or not to get her to realize they were done, and agree to announce. I think he was too stupid to think it would get out to the public though.
It seems his normal pattern has been to act out horribly to get himself thrown out of relationships, instead of just manning up and leaving with dignity for all. In this case, because there were kids involved and who knows why else, it didn’t work early on and he seems to have escalated the personal and professional humiliation of his wife in an attempt to get her to leave him. That is just a nasty display of [a word I’m leaving to your imagination]. Cannot stand to even look at him. I do pray wisdom for Jen going forward with her kids in this situation. She’s not perfect, but no one deserves that level of disrespect and ugliness.
His kids already know he’s a douche. Trust me.
Oh, I hope not! His daughters need to see him as a hero …
If they don’t , I hope they do eventually. If not, as adults they will mimic the pattern of loving a difficult, distant douche, looking at him with stars in their eyes even after years of crappy behavior.
The worst thing ever for kids is to teach them to excuse crappy behavior that they witnessed with their own eyes…it teaches them to doubt their own instincts. Better to know your dad’s a douche than to date or marry douche after douche, excusing their douchy-ness & thinking they’re a hero.
Those are some ill-fitting pants she has on, but the white blouse is cute.
Jennifer Garner shouldn`t have married him in first place.
I agree. She shouldn’t have married him. Jen got pregnant then they got married. Calculating. That was her move to climb up to A list celeb. She calculated and played the whole thing. He did the same to her to get out.
True.
She also shouldnt have married er first husband that adds he cheated on either.
I feel bad for Jen in some ways. It is really crappy that she gets compared to a psychopath for trying to protect her kids from her selfish ex and a whack job former nanny. There is no way that her older kids haven’t heard that story. She has been forced to do damage control because Ben is such an idiot. I don’t think they will get back together. But I think she will do damage control, whenever his screw ups threaten to hurt the kids.
She’s uses those kids as props to sell her normal mom schtick to the masses. She doesn’t seem to mind parading them past the paparazzi constantly. Ben isn’t the only awful one, imo. I mean she married him, right?
But she is not the one exposing the kids to public humiliation by having affairs broadcast all over the media. Do you think none of their kids have mean classmates who have asked about their dad and the nanny?
I think Jen’s love for Ben makes her come off like a sociopath he seems so selfish and annoying so one can wonder what she sees in him.His annoyingness is rubbing off on her.I think if they really go through with the divorce then we shall go back to liking her because she will be able to be herself rather than the woman trying to always save Ben.I think he is doing her a favour by divorcing her hopefully she will come off as more natural from now hence forth I mean post Affleck.
With regards to her clothes. Has anyone noticed she wears a Rolex, Chanel flats, and the latest handbags that are thousands of dollars. The clothes are calculated to appeal to Mom’s. Gimme a break!
She is really damned if does and damned if she doesn’t with some people.
@Amy I actually really like her blouse. Appeal works )) You don’t know by any chance what label it is?
I agree, Amy. DM always gives outfit rundowns in every single article no matter who they’re covering. Jen was wearing this quite ugly pair of expensive snakeskin sandals a few weeks ago and all the commenters there were appalled at the price of her shoes and saying that she should donate the $300-$800 to a reptile charity, whatever she paid for the shoes. The narrative over there is quite different from here, where $400 sandals are seen as dowdy.
I look forward to the day the first “official” shots of Ben and the nanny as a “real couple” come out, because I don’t believe they are DONE just on the down down low. Ben and Jen? Yeah now they are DONE, as soon as those pics of them smiling at each other went viral, Ben’s team quickly went to TMZ and shot down any reconciliation talk even said “damage done”, of course not to be out done, Jen’s team issued their own “no way she would take him back” statement. It’s beyond ridiculous and actually really embarrassing at this point, the back and forth, the he said she said, these two were so private during their marriage for the most part, but with this divorce everything is for public consumption, and why? Custody of the kids? Trying to save face and careers? Both are failing as human beings right now.
Nanny and Ben are hiding. But if they become couple, wouldn’t make Ben’s career hit the gutter. People already hate the nanny. It would be a big PR spin to make her likeable.
I’m pretty sure the nanny is out of the picture. If she was still with Ben, she would never have sold her story. She also would have gotten better gifts.
I doubt Ben would even want to be “taken back” by Jennifer. If he still loved her or cared about his marriage he wouldn’t behave the way he has been for all these years. Jenn is probably happy she is about to be legally done with him to.
This is just getting weird. If I had a family with three young children, I would not want this much exposure.
Am I the only one that thinks Jennifer garner is really beautiful? The dowdy look is sort of tiresome, but I saw that credit card commercial she’s in last night and she is really stunning. Yeah she looks frumpy as far as her clothes, but I don’t think she wears much makeup in her down time and I wish I looked that good without makeup.
No, you’re not. I am shocked at the number of “she’s boring” and “needs to wear makeup” comments, I need makeup to look presentable and Jen doesn’t. My #facegoals are to not have to wear makeup so it’s pretty amazing that Jen doesnt. And the Facebook comments that the nanny is hotter than Jen? No way, no how.
At least Jen got the gray Lexus the nanny was driving of Ben’s. I believe Giselle shut the nanny down. I think Ben wanted it to play on out. I think Jen actually relieved. I know I would be. But why are the paps not sitting outside Ben’s new place….we already know Nanny showed us where it is. Why no pics from there are is he back in a hotel.
He doesn’t call the paps like Jen.
I would be willing to bet he absolutely does.
He does! He is very image conscious. Remember the slaves debacle on PBS? He made a lot of people unemployed because they catered to his narcissism.
Why Giselle, why would she do that? I hope Affleck paid her and I hope he paid her TONS. Like a million.
Will the real Jennifer Garner speak up not the fake pr stuff being delivered to us.
+1
This
X10
Only sympathy I have is for their innocent children who didn’t ask for this. Jen knew Ben was an unfaithful A$$hole who sleeps around without using protection. His breakup with JLo was very public and detailed. So being either excessively stupid or excessively arrogant, she had unprotected sex with him. Gets pregnant, takes it up a notch by marrying him when everyone is like “girl don’t, you will regret that”. Continues to have kids with him while he has side chicks, gambling and alcohol problems.
Dragged her feet for a year over filing for a divorce then decided him sleeping with the nanny was a bridge too far (LOL, really not the drinking). Now we are to cry for her as she takes the dimple parade to churches and children’s hospitals. Sorry both Ben and Jen suck for bringing those kids into this unhealthy family they created.
+!
So true Jennifer Garner also has her part for actions she is responsible as well instead of looking the other way.
Love is blind and I think Jennifer loved Ben deeply and sincerely. Yes there was the image game too but at the core was the fact that she loved him and did not want to lose him for herself or the kids. I think he wanted out for years and would be close then she would convince him to stay. He had to make her not want him anymore and he did this to make his clear break. I don’t think he thought it would blow up in his face in public. I think he hurt her very deeply and how she can even stomach being around him now is amazing. Say what you want but she will sacrifice herself for her kids. I don’t think she calls the paps. I think there is a heightened market for pics of both of them right now in the media especially her but she is determined to live her life like she normally would her normal routine. You can’t expect her to hole up in her house for months the kids have to be taken to school sports etc.
Not one, but two sources )) So one of the sources is Ben’s and that means he doesn’t want back? Well, then it’s a divorce, I guess. And they’ve taken my nanny away. Now they must provide something else or we’re going to start discussing Ben’s addictions again or who was it, that he went to Canadian village with on Jen’s birthday.
Yes let’s return to the basics. He still has dead eyes too.
I also want to throw darts (metaphoric) at the source who says they both care about each other. No one who actually cares about me would ever treat me the way he treated her. Yeah callin BS on that.
I think he did want back when the train derailed, not for the marriage but for his career. Now that she’s made clear no way, he has no choice but to say the same and play happy divorce. I’m also pretty sure he hoped to live onsite after divorce so he could have the best of both worlds – easy and convenient access to the kids but freedom from responsibilities as a husband. I believe he loves his kids but will have a hard time giving them focus on his own initiative and was hoping Garner would continue to make that happen for him. Life is gonna be very different and much more complicated for him now. Freedom comes at cost.
I agree with you-especially the dead eyes! I still think he is conflicted. I don’t buy the theory that it was all Jennifer Garner denying him his divorce. I think he kept on crawling back to her knowing that she wanted to stay a family. I think we are seeing a clear transition from a family of 5 to a family of 4 and Ben will be on the outside looking in.
In the past although he was gone they still included him but now he is on his own. He will be leaving soon to film movies and the relationship will falter more. He will end up with a young wife who will have to be with him constantly for him to be faithful. He will probably have more kids too. I know I paint a bleak picture but he brought it on himself. He wanted his freedom but it is coming at a high price. He should stay with the nanny she has no shame either.
Tina, I think guilt is going to cause a greater spiral of drinking, etc. he loves his kids and I imagine he never thought their childhood would become so much like his own. It really is tragic the damage addictions will cause.
Debbie, I am sure you are right. He is in danger of spiraling out of control. When the divorce drama happened I honestly thought he was in the process of a public nervous breakdown. I don’t think he has developed any strong coping skills. He was smoking non-stop too.
I don’t agree at all. I think they both look more at peace recently. Including Ben. Seems there’s a lot of projecting going on here when it comes to Ben. It’s 100% normal to feel – and look! – like you’re having a nervous breakdown when you go through a divorce. So, I’m not surprised he looked that way and was chain-smoking. I’m sure he felt guilt, remorse, sadness, etc., and second-guessed decisions he’d made, which is also normal when you go through a divorce, until enough time has passed that both of you can truly put things into perspective. I remember when my parents split up, my mother started smoking, although she wasn’t a smoker, and then she quit again soon after. I mean, divorce is sad, terrible and messy – and although it seems easy to point the finger at Ben, no one here truly knows what he did in their marriage – only him and Jennifer. And I’m sure Jennifer had her issues as well, although they weren’t as blatant and attention-grabbing as Ben’s. One thing I know from coming from generations of divorce, even when cheating is involved, there’s nearly always more than one side to the story. These two seem to have been unhappy for a very long time – for years before the nanny incident – so why is it so hard to accept that they might BOTH actually be happier in the long run as co-parents vs. spouses. Is everyone just trying to avenge old boyfriends who cheated and “didn’t realize what they gave up” through Ben and Jen?
I haven’t ever been cheated on to my knowledge so I don’t think I’m projecting. My ex and I get along and I was his best friend when his dad was very ill for months and died.
I actually believe the root of the behaviors in this situation is addiction, and I have walked closely with several close friends and family dealing with those issues both as the sober spouse and the addict. I see a lot of stuff in this situation that is sadly familiar and I can give very good guesses as to how some things will play out. If you know the patterns, you know they are pretty predictable.
This isn’t about a simple cheating incident by a spouse. If that were all, it would have passed after the first weekend of headlines. What happened to JG is so offensive it just isn’t easily put aside, even if the root is from his demons. Also, I actually do NOT see peace in either of them. I have never seen him look more troubled, in fact.
I truly have hope for healing for both of them. That needs to happen separately. They are toxic together for now at least. Too much damage.
Again, I am sincerely hoping for a better future for the whole family, but unless something changes in the addictions, it’s not looking good.
I also have addiction in my family, so I understand the patterns too. But none of us actually know anything at all about what happened between Ben and Jen except for what is in the tabloids. All we know is that they appear to have had serious problems for many years – the details of those problems are just rumor and speculation.
True, and since we are commenting on a gossip blog, I’m comfortable with speculating based on rumor and gossip. Agreed they have apparently had problems for years per that same rumor and gossip. It’s the how it (divorce) was brought about, not the mere fact of it that has stirred the hornets.
I do like Jen, and hope that she could rebuild her career but I have my doubts, at her age and with three kids, and not getting prime roles, I think her days are numbered. She never was successful in the movies, I think that ship has sailed, if this christian movie fails and the one she shot with Kevin Spacey, Nine Lives, fails then I think she’s done. She might have a career back on TV or maybe doing a cooking show. But her days of being on the Oscars and Golden Globes are done without her association with Ben, Ben will always be a major draw, even with this scandal, he is the one that will always be invited to the Big Party, Jen will need a major major kick ass role to be considered A-list again, she’ll have to earn it on her own, and like I said those roles are not being offered to someone like her. Oh well..
I never saw Alias back in its day, but watched the first season this weekend. She has serious action moves! I hope for something great for her as well.
What movies made her A-list? “Ghosts of Girlfriends Past”? “Arthur”? “Butter”? I don’t get the Oscar reference – presumably you mean she attended as a guest – not a nominee or recipient.
Real A-listers like Nicole Kidman, Cate Blanchett et. al. have nothing to worry about where JG is concerned.
Remember when their divorce anouncement was called out as PR amazing? Whatever!!! Neither looks good and they need to shut it down. They are playing the public without comment & pap walks. Ego much? They aren’t that interesting – except for the Nannny part.
Jennifer Garner has finally seen the light.
After reading today’s RadarOnline article I get the impression that Ben’s PR is laying the groundwork for him to date. He is probably tired of having to go undercover all summer.
I don’t know why they bother. It isn’t going to be a positive influence for those who are already outraged at him no matter how they build it up. To those who don’t care, they still won’t care. There’s only one thing that could restore him to favor generally and I don’t think he’s capable of it at this point.
Of course Ben is right back on the dating bandwagon, he probably never got off it. But if he were to do it publicly already? Ew. Not a smart PR move at. ALL. I bet the nanny would care more than Jen, I’d love to be a fly in the wall when the nanny finds out Bens first publicly linked woman, post divorce!
Here’s a thought…who would want to BE the first one out publicly with him? Knowing what he has done and hearing JG being ripped repeatedly for ever marrying the guy “knowing” what he was like 10 years ago. That would NOT be good PR for the woman either. He’s toxic in that way, I think.
And bless her heart, she deserved a chance to blow up. Two hours wouldn’t have been nearly enough.
Personally, I’ll be happy when both of them start dating again. They’ve been a bad match together for years. As the Radar story also says, Jen thinks Ben is a great father, and that’s what really matters here. If Ben just dates and never marries again, so be it – who cares? It’s their life. Maybe he will be better off not getting married – nothing wrong with that.
Haha – there’s a lot of “stuff” out there indicating he’s been “dating” for some / many? of the years they were married already. So, maybe we should say he should “continue” dating or date someone new instead? Ready for Jen to find true love, though. Hope she’s learned what to look for and what to avoid. I say “haha” but I don’t really think it’s funny, BTW.
People seem to forget all the talk about Jen before she divorced Scott Foley – the rumors that she was aggressively pursuing Ben and used to play games with Scott by calling Ben right in front of him on the set of Alias. Not that it matches up to what Ben has ALLEGEDLY done over the years. But it was exactly this obsessive quality that always made me dislike Jen just a little teensy tiny bit. From the beginning, she seemed to go after Ben with a no holds barred attitude – it seemed like she was determined to catch him and keep him at any cost, and that’s exactly what she did, and she held on with a vice grip regardless of what he did all this time until the happy couple image she was bent on maintaining came crashing down publicly, and she couldn’t pretend anymore. So that’s why I really don’t hate or blame either one exclusively – I blame them both, and I think they will be better off separate.
Wow. Just Wow. And at no point in the 10 years they were married did he ever have access to the U.S. Court system to separate himself? That’s the thing. He could have left at ANY time with dignity for all — it just didn’t work out, or they weren’t compatible, etc. The fact that he acted out instead of manning up? That’s because he allegedly KNEW she was the reason he got his career back and he allegedly KNEW she was the reason he had such a good reputation with the public as a strong family man. He apparently didn’t want to be the one to leave because it would look bad on him? So, he allegedly made her life a living hell to push her to leave him? So she deserves whatever she gets? Wow. Just wow.
Diane, my thoughts exactly – Wow!
No, absolutely not my point. I think he could have and should have left much earlier. And I’m not justifying anything he ALLEGEDLY did. But I think Jen could and should have left much earlier too. That’s my point. And the assumptions made above about why he stayed with her – it was good for his career, etc. are just that. There’s such incredible vitriol against him for all of the assumptions and “allegedlies” out there. I actually find that to be the “wow” factor. Tha fact that a complete case has been built, and he has been hung and quartered by people who don’t actually know a thing about it. Granted this is a gossip site, and I’m commenting on gossip too, and that’s all fine, but what I’m saying is that I don’t actually know the truth about any of it, and so I’m certainly not going to be part of the crowd-shaming of Ben Affleck. I’m just saying I think she has accountability too, and I’m sure they both contributed to the problems over the years. Her blind determination to stay with someone in the face of what was right in front of her over and over again for years, yes, she’s accountable for that. If that’s so shocking to say, I’m not sure why at all. I’m sure she has started to realize this about herself too and this is hopefully why she’s starting to turn the corner and not fall back into their usual patterns. I’m never going to take a side on this one. I think they were aways a bad fit and just played the marriage out well past its expiration date. That’s really all.
I just want to say that I don’t pick sides here either in the divorce. I’ve gone back and read many of the gossip blurbs about them over the years. They clearly have had problems, if THOSE are to be believed. Why they didn’t split is known only to them and I would guess was tied to having young children. The only thing about this situation that even grabbed my attention (I have paid virtually no attention to Hollywood stuff previously) is the extreme disregard a man showed his wife / mother of kids in the nanny thing. That was egregious and beyond awful IMO. I realize it’s gossip and rumors, but there is enough detail that I believe it happened and that is why I have such a total negative attitude about him. It makes my heart hurt that any man could so badly treat their spouse. No one deserves that kind of attack. It’s like blaming a victim for a crime just because they chose to be in the wrong place to say that because she overstayed in the relationship she in some way called this down on herself. I am NOT labeling her a victim, just that the circumstances in the scenarios seem to parallel.
So, JoJo, “Catch and (Never) Release”? That’s at least according to a Lainey blind from awhile back…
@Laura – Can you send a link? I searched but can’t find it…
I understand your feelings on it Diane, and I agree that the nanny incident shows a complete lack of respect. I’m still not 100% convinced of exactly what happened there, but whatever it was, it seems that it was obviously inappropriate and overstepped boundaries. I don’t blame Jen in any way for that. I will admit, I think she seems to be a bit controlling, and even now, if we are to believe rumors, Radar is saying she is the one who had the idea to pay the nanny to stay quiet. Of course I understand she wants to protect her kids, but this seems to be a pattern – being aware of Ben’s activities and running around after him, cleaning it up and covering it up … I’m not blaming her for Ben’s actions at all – that’s on him – but it seems she was willing to put up with this and actively cover it up for years until now when the nanny incident blew up publicly and blew their family image wide open. I do think they’re both accountable for staying in the dysfunction way too long, but I’m definitely not justifying Ben’s actions, whatever they may have been, including the nanny.
Enjoyed “talking” with you. Wouldn’t it be nice if it were scripted reality and not real life?
Haha! 🙂 You too, Diane. Yes, that would be nice. Goodnight for now – until the next wave of headlines! :/