Is Melania Trump actually a sympathetic figure or not so much?

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For the past year, it feels like everyone has been trying to figure out whether Melania Trump is actually a sympathetic figure, or if we should judge her solely by the fact that she married Donald Trump. I have sympathy for the fact that she really and truly did not want to be First Lady – she would have been perfectly happy as the trophy wife, a fake-billionaire’s third wife. She loves her son, she loves living in New York, she loves clothes and she loves going to parties, I would imagine. She never signed on to anything but that, and she was largely absent for the bulk of Baby Fists’ campaign. Still, it’s difficult for me to genuinely have sympathy for her – she’s not a helpless victim with zero resources at her disposal and if she wanted to, she could do some real, substantive work with the platform of FLOTUS. She won’t though. Pretty soon she’ll be claiming all of Michelle Obama’s work as her own.

Those were my mix of emotions regarding Melania. But damn it, I still felt a stab of sadness when this clip started going viral yesterday. It’s a closeup of a moment from the inauguration and OMG, this is just… YIKES.

So, do we really need a Free Melania movement? I say no… with caveats. Melania doesn’t need to be freed because it’s pretty clear that she and Baby Fists have agreed to live apart for the next six months, meaning she’s already pretty free. And who knows where we’ll be in six months after all? We could be knee-deep in impeachment hearings. Fingers crossed!

Meanwhile, Melania is hoping she doesn’t cause massive traffic jams in New York. TMZ (which has become Baby Fists Central) claims that the Secret Service has worked it out so they’ll be “blocking off streets in a rolling pattern” every morning as Melania takes her son to school, so that streets won’t be closed for hours at a time. It’s still going to be a huge problem though, right?

Photos courtesy of Getty, PCN, Fame/Flynet.

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384 Responses to “Is Melania Trump actually a sympathetic figure or not so much?”

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  1. Tx_mom says:

    Her body language during that dance says it all.

    • MsGoblin says:

      Exactly. In that last photo, it looks like she is bracing for a punch.

      • bleu_moon says:

        @Lilly- Wow. After watching that video any last vestiges of pity I had for her are gone.

      • Lahdidahbaby says:

        After seeing the clip below, I had no more pity for her.

      • V4Real says:

        She is dumb as a box of rocks.

        My opinion is that she won’t be staying in DC because after she met with Michelle Obama she realized she couldn’t hold a candle to what the First ladies do. Imagine her trying to talk politics with other politicians wives. I bet she would be the one sitting quietly, smiling politely as she sips her tea. The other reason she is staying in NY is because it puts space between her and that vile man.

        Be careful what you wish for Melania, be careful.

      • V4Real says:

        Also I want to add that even in the video clips she doesn’t look happy and perhaps Trump rehearsed her as what to say about the birther questions. You say what I tell you to say or else.

        The video clip where he has her come up to the mic to say a few words shows a woman who didn’t want to be there. Did you notice her face immediately after she stopped speaking and her body language. She walked away with her head down. She looked as if she just wanted to be shown to the nearest exit.

      • VirgiliaCoriolanus says:

        @V4Real
        My thing is–she’s a clueless trophy wife. I doubt she cares anything about politics, etc. Anyone who sees her…….especially during this election cycle can tell that. She was only trotted out after Trump’s first few xenophobic/anti-immigrant remarks…….and then when people started to talk about HOW she got into the country…….they stuck her back in the background. Which is how she wants it. So anything she says means that she is reading it from a cue card. Period.

      • Greta says:

        That’s how victims of narcissists normally react. No surprise here.

    • Greenieweenie says:

      She’s in that position women have been in since the beginning of one: wedded to a man to ensure her material wellbeing (I can’t judge; she’s from Slovenia..? It’s understandable), and trading off of her appearance as a result. I really feel privileged to live in a time where I get by on my mind–not my physical labor, my appearance, or my ability to have/raise children (don’t get me wrong, being paid to think isn’t particularly fun). Yet you still see women making these trade offs that we have always had to make. That’s how you know the system is still stacked against women.

      • detritus says:

        I feel like shes in a profoundly powerless situation. Donald is abusive to his wives. Ivana being raped (which she rescinded) and pressured into surgery, that doesn’t stop when you change wives, and he found one with even LESS power.

        She can be a bad person, it doesn’t change that I think she’s in a nasty situation.

      • lala says:

        I am sorry, you can not judge because she is from Slovenia…? Now, wait a minute…

      • Bitsy says:

        Thank you for that intelligent answer. Americans forget that the rest of the world is still centuries behind us. Especially in communist countries, where both genders are hustling to survive. There are plenty opportunists in our free democracy so I can only imagine how a beautiful woman in a despot is raised to believe her only chances are through a man.

      • Guesto says:

        @Bitsy – “Americans forget that the rest of the world is still centuries behind us.”

        What now?

      • Timbuktu says:

        @Guesto
        I know, right? Decades in SOME attitudes – perhaps, but then again, the US is decades behind in some other aspects, too. But centuries? Huh?

        @lala
        I think the idea was that someone who has not lived in Slovenia, especially at the time Melania chose to leave, cannot judge why she did what she did. I think it’s pretty open-minded, don’t you think?

      • pandabird says:

        Slovenia is NOT a 3rd world country. Americans forget that many parts of the rest of the world is very developed, and perhaps even better off than the USA. *gasps*

      • Timbuktu says:

        @pandabird
        Slovenia is second world. :-)

      • Greenieweenie says:

        @Lala, yes, because she is from a place with a recent history of political oppression and economic depression (which is almost always disproportionately endured by women). I am not. I would not judge her for making decisions I wouldn’t make because mine are made from a position of material advantage.

      • Greenieweenie says:

        I never said Slovenia was a third world country. Off the top of my head, without Googling, I imagine it is a former Eastern bloc country affected by the Balkan Wars in that region during the early 1990s, which is exactly when Melania was strategizing her gold digging. You want to act like that’s somehow equivalent to me spending the early 1990s attending an excellent public school in a middle-class suburb of a well-to-do Canadian city that hasn’t seen war since never? Okay.

      • Alex says:

        @Bitsy
        It’s not all rosy (especially not in the 1990s), but Slovenia has
        - universal healthcare
        - paternal leave of up to 37 weeks, with 90% of the pay (there’s a cap)
        - a Human Development Index that is “very high” (0.880; USA: 0.915).
        - 

And if you happen to be in the area: places like Ljubljana (whose first settlements go back to 2000 BC) are nothing short of delightful.

      • KarEna says:

        I’m sorry, but as someone from Slovenia I would suggest you read about it, at least two paragraphs before you dismiss it as a third world country, or whatever the hell you mean with (I can’t judge; she’s from Slovenia..? It’s understandable). Jesus christ, I bet you don’t even know where it’s located.

        But just to help you out a bit. First and the most important thing: it’s a democratic country where the person with the most votes wins an election (sorry I had to) and a school system that is free for everybody (Primary school, high school, and UNI)..

        And than:
        US
        Crime Index: 48.71
        Safety Index: 51.29
        Slovenia
        Crime Index: 23.93
        Safety Index: 76.07
        Slovenia
        Quality of Life Index: 174.81
        US
        Quality of Life Index: 179.49
        (This are not alternative facts)

        regarding of the women in today’s society and equality, we are up there with the other developed countries in Europe and it’s not lower than that in US.

        I’m not implying or claiming that one is better as the other (both obviously have their problems), and I understand that all of us are a bit patriotic, but uneducated people that dismiss everything and everybody that is not America, as a third world country just piss me off…

        Not everyone’s dream is to move in the US. The time’s where it was a dream country and people were looking up to it, are far gone.

        As far as Melania goes, the public opinion about her (that is not her hometown – those people are nuts in my opinion) it’s not too loving.
        Why she moved? Ammm, work probably? (hey, it’s just a suggestion) Isn’t that a part of the ‘modeling’ job (traveling I mean)?
        Why she married Trump? That It’s called greed and it has absolutely nothing to do with conditions of living in Slovenia.

      • Llc says:

        She is from a middle/upper middle class family. She quit college to model. Slovenia is – and has been – a stable country. She could have taken any number of life paths. She chose to marry Trump, and there is no way she didn’t know what she was getting into. She was not desperate or pitiable. She was digging for gold. She (maybe) got it.

      • Locke Lamora says:

        Yugoslavia was not in the Eastern Bloc ( do try to read about the Tito-Stalin split and the Non-Aligned movement). Out of all the communist countries, it was the most prosperous, and even now, a lot of people ( maybe even the majority) would say that they lived better than now. Education, health care was very good, and safety was then, as well as now, much better than in the US.
        And in Yugoslavia, Slovenia was the most economically advanced, followed by Croatia, but unlike Croatia it did not have a war ( the unrest in Slovenia lasted for 10 days) . On top of that, Melania grew up in a middle class family. She probably wouldn’t have been a gazillionaire, but she would have been fine without marrying Trump.

        So, for heaven’s sake, google a few things before you write such utter bullshit.

        The amount of prejudice and ignorance towards Eastern Europeans is baffling sometimes, and sadly, I don’t think it will ever change. And Slovenia is not even in Eastern Europe.

      • dotdotdot says:

        Comments like that make me furious beyond words. Do you people even understand that THIS — THIS! — is WHY and HOW 53% of you voted for Trump!? THIS is why you are #PostTruth. You are ignorant (about people in the world and in your own country) + xenophobic and you just. don´t. care.

      • Greenieweenie says:

        Oh, FFS. I didn’t dismiss Slovenia as a third world country. Don’t put words in my mouth.

        I’m making a FACTUAL distinction. The FACTS are that Slovenia in 1990s is not comparable to North America. You realize people make these distinctions all the time? They’re called political economists. You can jump up and down all you want and insist there’s absolutely no difference between the level of agency exercised by a woman in Slovenia in the early 1990s and a woman in North America at the same time, but you’re wrong.

        SIMILARLY, I would not judge a woman from Mexico for getting gold diggery. Or China, for that matter. I would not judge a woman in any country stuck in a middle income trap, any country with a recent history of conflict, or any country that doesn’t extend popular sovereignty. If you’re focused on that, you’re missing the point and making my comment about your ego.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        *** Public Service Announcement ***
        The comments on this thread do not reflect the views and perspective of all American women. Thankfully.

        smh

      • Amaria says:

        This reminds me of all the times I had to explain to Americans that where I live, we actually have electricity and polar bears do not roam the streets. Sadly. #iheartpolarbears

      • Greenieweenie says:

        I have to run so let me draw some quick parallels, since so many are misunderstanding my point. Someone I know is in a band that tours heavily. Their fan base is mostly teenagers. He talks about these teenaged girls with disgust for throwing themselves at him–as if they’re disposable, as if anything that happens to these girls as a result is entirely their own fault.

        I can’t stand this. These are young GIRLS. Half of them probably don’t even have the life experience to understand how males are interpreting what they’re communicating, and the half that has the life experience–what does that say about us as a society? There’s so much social conditioning at work.

        It’s the same way with women who try to get pregnant on one night stands with famous athletes/musicians. You hear so many artists just trashing these women for their game. And I can’t help but think this is sexism on so many levels. Women are conditioned to trade on their appearance at the expense of other attributes–we’re told this is the most important/attractive/valuable thing about us–and then punished when we
        find a way to make it profitable for us.

        I see someone like Melania–she’s traded on her appearance for material security (and yes, a US passport represents an increase in material security especially for someone from a place of political and economic insecurity. I don’t care how middle class she might’ve been or how nice Slovenian health care was in 1992). I’m not hating on her for that because this is what women have always done in a man’s world. I’ll only hate on her if she turns around and uses her serendipitous ascent into a position of real power to oppress other people.

      • Neens says:

        I can’t believe there are people who believe the rest of the world is centuries behind the US. Thank you for fulfilling the Ignorant American trope.

        In all honesty though, attitudes like that are probably why the US is now lagging behind other nations.

      • KarEna says:

        Yes it’s all about ego from the people that live in those countries. And it’s nothing but prejudice and ignorance from you.

        And btw gold digging is something I judge AF (selling and buying), if you have a place to live if you have food in your table and you are safe… Its prostitution of the finest (not out of necessity). And is an opposite of everything I stand for as a feminist. But then I guess I have different values than you, and my pride means to me a lot more than money.

      • Sofia says:

        @Greenieweenie
        “She’s in that position women have been in since the beginning of one: wedded to a man to ensure her material wellbeing *(I can’t judge; she’s from Slovenia..? It’s understandable)* … ” ——- I am sorry but WTF?????? What exactly is understandable? Slovenia even in time when Melania left was a great country. OK she wouldn’t be a millionare but she would have a perfectly normal and healthy life. (reasons: read KarEna response)
        I just can’t … For everything else I just want to add I agree with everything written by LOCKE LAMORA and KarEna.

      • Lambda says:

        Greenie, Yugoslavia was never an Eastern Block country.

        Bitsy, you’re painfully off. Seriously, people, maybe read about your sisters abroad?

        ETA: ouch, I just saw Locke’s comment, didn’t mean to pile on.

      • V4Real says:

        It’s funny and judgmental that almost everyone on this thread just assumed @Greeniemeenie was from the USA. She could have been from Canada. I’m sure she has identified where she is from on a different post and some of you might know that but it’s also fair to say that some of you didn’t know where she was from but just assumed she was from the US. Doesn’t this make some of you just as judgmental about people from the US. It’s basically saying she must be American because only Americans say things like this about other countries.

      • Lambda says:

        V4real, I reject knee-jerk anti-Americanism because it’s stupid. But you’re nit-picking a bit. When people talk about white feminism, they know it’s recognizable, and the country of origin matters less. I see here a similar reaction to a different form of condescension, Western vs Eastern feminism, or North vs South, or first world vs developing. I dare suspect “American” is only a shortcut to that, albeit incorrect.

      • GreenieWeenie says:

        ^^Thanks, V4R. To everyone telling me I’m ignorant, xenophobic and need to Google things about the world, I’m a social scientist with a PhD in International Relations who has spent nearly all of my professional life in a developing country [sorry, editing out some of the details. You're not getting my CV]. Really not sure how I could make a greater effort to understand the world than I already have and do.

        You all are arguing over something I didn’t say. But I’m over it and can’t be bothered to clarify any more than I have.

        Lately, I wish I’d gone into dentistry. Nobody has opinions on bicuspids (OR DO THEY). Mainstream culture has gotten so extremely dumb that everyone assumes the worst when it comes to internet opinions. Blargh.

      • Goldie says:

        @Lambda But Canadians and Western Europeans also criticize Americans for supposedly being ethnocentric and xenophobic. So I do think the specific country matters. You can’t just lump everyone together. If a Canadian says something ignorant, it’s not fair to use it as another example of the “typical ignorant American”.

        That said, I’m not sure why everyone piled on Greenieweenie. She was clearly just trying to be express empathy. It’s true we don’t know much about Melania or what her motivations for coming to the US and marrying Trump were. Even if some disagree with Greenieweenie’s comments, there was nothing malicious or xenophobic about them, imo.

      • Lambda says:

        I didn’t lump anybody with nobody, I even mentioned that it was an incorrect stance. I do know that outside the West, American is often a shortcut for Western.

        Greenieweenie’s position was entirely benevolent. Western feminism always is.

      • Gwen says:

        @Bitsy – “Americans forget that the rest of the world is still centuries behind us.”
        Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

        Want are you smoking, itsy Bitsy?

        That’s an uneducated statement.
        We in Europe are ways forward, the US only can dream of, yeah google is the only thing you have what is not dated, but your whole system is outworn, you have a power supply system we had last time in the 1950′ and so on and on…..
        Don’t even let’s talk about your election system…yeah right, election on tuesdays, great for the economy today, but from a Time when slavery was legal. The Whole Election system is outdated.
        Health Care System, only sad and so backwards.
        For a rich Nation like your’s you should be ashamed about the weak education system and the vast Poverty, you are behind in so many ways, and your President shows a lot, you are not perceived as pioneer from the outside rather backwardly.

        Bitsy you are delusional.

      • Gwen says:

        @Bitsy – “Americans forget that the rest of the world is still centuries behind us.”
        Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

        What are you smoking, itsy Bitsy?

        That’s an uneducated statement.
        We in Europe are ways forward, the US only can dream of, yeah google is the only thing you have what is not dated, but your whole system is outworn, you have a power supply system we had last time in the 1950′ and so on and on…..
        Don’t even let’s talk about your election system…yeah right, election on tuesdays, great for the economy today, but from a Time when slavery was legal. The Whole Election system is outdated.
        Health Care System, only sad and so backwards.
        For a rich Nation like your’s you should be ashamed about the weak education system and the vast Poverty, you are behind in so many ways, and your President shows a lot, you are not perceived as pioneer from the outside rather backwardly.

      • Gwen says:

        …sorry double post…

      • Goldie says:

        @lambda I didn’t mean to suggest that you were lumping everyone together. I was referring to some of the other posters. My point was that a lot of people perceive Americans to be arrogant and ethnocentric, even more so than other westerners. So when someone refers to the “ignorant American” trope I wouldn’t presume that they are just using “American” as an all-encompassing term for “western”.
        But I’ll take your word for it when you say that is what Eastern Europeans mean when they say “American”.

      • Timbuktu says:

        Ok, I wish everyone would take a chill pill. I’m from Eastern Europe and 90-s were ROUGH in most Eastern European countries. We don’t always have time to do research before posting, especially if we’re, essentially, merely acknowledging the possibility that people from other countries could have different economic realities during certain times. I actually thought it was a good educated guess by GreenieWeenie that Slovenia in the 90-s had it harder than the US. If she is wrong, I’m sure she will be happy to learn it, coming from Slovenians especially, but why bite her head off? I mean, for a group of people who constantly talk about being intersectional, way to attack someone who tried to keep in mind that women in other countries could be facing different hardships, and that if that still doesn’t excuse gold-digging for you, others can have different opinions.

      • Timbuktu says:

        @KarEna
        Slovenia sounds positively great. So, tell me: what’s your immigration situation? As in – would you take in some Americans? :-)

      • Locke Lamora says:

        Greenieweenie’s comment wasn’t that bad. A bit ignorant, but not that bad.

        This, however, was.
        “Americans forget that the rest of the world is still centuries behind us.”

        Maybe we did overreact a bit, but we are from the part of the world that’s constantly portrayed horribly in every movie, tv show, even in media that is not fictional. We’re poor, dirty, uneducated, criminals and prostitues. We’re all lumped together even if a country like Slovenia has more similarities with Austria than Russia. And that’s been happening for decades and I don’t see any positive improvemnet whatsoever.
        So, I do apologise if I overreacted, but these things make my blood boil. Probably because I’m a crazy violent person from the Balkans.

      • GreenieWeenie says:

        ^^Ugh, I can’t handle being called ignorant when there’s so much REAL ignorance out there. I’m not. I analyze the ways politics and economics have historically combined to shape the behavior of countries and groups (so surprise! this is the lens through which I interpret individual behavior). When I refer to material incentives for behavior, I’m not making a claim or stating an opinion. I’m talking about real political and economic data that can be measured and evaluated (and it is, and this is the primary way that we explain behavior and make cross-country comparisons in international politics and trade).

        So a quick glance at some data within context: in 1992, riiiiight around the time Melania came to the US, the GDP of Slovenia was at its lowest point…naturally, because the country had only been a sovereign state for a year following a major exogenous shock to the international political system (the collapse of the Soviet Union, which is virtually next door). Sovereignty is what permits membership in international organizations such as, oh, NATO, the OECD…(you know, the organizations that made you not part of the Eastern bloc). As a new nation-state, Slovenia supported the NATO campaign in Kosovo even as it was still advancing the reforms necessary to join it. So yeah, after ten seconds of rethinking my knee-jerk assessment of the region ca. 1990s, I would say the country faced some serious political risk among other existential issues. That is self evident and not remotely controversial. I have no personal impression of Slovenian culture or Slovenian people whatsoever–probably don’t watch enough movies.

        Never mind that women have always traded sex for material security–you can interpret that in many ways (whether inside the institution of marriage, which was largely involuntary for women, or outside of it). I take a personal interest in trying to understand why women who have demonstrably more agency than ever before in history continue to do so today, mainly because I’ve always been baffled by a lot of women my own age (am I the only one??!).

        @Lambda, my “position”, as you see it, has no moral quality. My view of Slovenia vs the US is a matter of factual/data analysis. My sympathy is recognition of the degree to which individual agency is always limited by the force of history.

      • KarEna says:

        You have a Phd? What is that supposed to mean? That you are smarter? More educated? Well I have a masters degree. Industrial Engineering imagine that, I don’t live under a rock.. Me, a woman in a country that women need to flee to get a sugar daddy. And I can pay for my apartment, my car and my vacations. No need to trap a guy with a baby so he would support me. And no I’m not single nor am I gay. And if you don’t think that is wrong trapping guys nor that is wrong how girls are throwing herself on the rich musicians and celebrities is not wrong, just as it is wrong how they use and abuse it…. Then I don’t know…

        That kind of behavior from each site will never get as on a equal field. We are trying and fighting to move away from being seen just as sexsual objects. People want to have sex and they should, but that should be out of fun with trust and consent and not to use or abuse someone having an hidden agenda to do so(again both, men and women). And if women have been in this position of the beginning of one, they were because they had no other choice. That was the only way of a better life because they have been oppressed since day one (I’m not using we, because we are privileged enough of having predecessor that fought for us). Now we can educate ourselves, we can work, and probably I won’t become a millionaire but I can have more than a decent life.And Melania had all the same possibilities when she was growing up. She didn’t live and grow up in the age of The Flintstones.

        And why is that something we jumped on? Well why I jumped it’s because of ignorant presumptions from someone that is assuming stuff about a country they know a single s*&! about (Central Europe btw.) Presumptions that I’m sick and tired of hearing quiet frankly.Because of behavior like this is why Trump got elected in the first place. People just don’t want to check fact and speak into the thin air what ever they think its true.

        And as explained by someone above that I agree with. When I write ignorant Americans Im talking about the ignorant portion (62,980,160 and a couple counting).

        @Timbuktu – I’m pretty sure I explained in what cases I excuse gold digging. Women in countries with no rights and women in positions where this the only way for a decent life. Again. Reading… And in case of immigration. As long as they are willing to learn the language and adapt to our society, colture and social norms (not talking about religion), and not enforce their own I have no problem with immigrants.

        Sorry to taking up so much space but this is something that annoys the living hell outta me. And now I need to go to sleep so good night everybody.

      • Locke Lamora says:

        Your data is not wrong. However, such data often doesn’t always portray living conditions accurately.

        To conclude all of this, Melania would have been just fine without Donald.

      • Timbuktu says:

        @Locke Lamora
        But the comment about centuries behind (which I also took issue with) came from bitsy, not from GreenieWeenie! Yet GreenieWeenie is the one who got insulted again and again. I think it’s rather different to say “I think that a woman from Slovenia in the 90-s may have had a rougher time than me, so who am I to judge” and to say “I always forget the rest of the world is 100-s of years behind us”! Again, if you’re from Slovenia and feel that the comment is ignorant OF SLOVENIA – it’s great to speak up. But not being aware of the realities of life in Slovenia an ignorant person does not make.
        Trust me, I hear you! I know exactly what you mean, I’ve lost count how many “funny” jokes about Eastern European prostitutes I have swallowed in my lifetime. It is further compounded by the fact that I’m also routinely told to shut up as a white woman, because don’t know what negative stereotypes and discrimination are. I just feel like GreenieWeenie should not have been the target of such harsh posts.

      • Timbuktu says:

        @KarEna
        I’m not sure why you addressed me specifically about gold-digging. I never called you out on anything you said about it. My main point was – what is and isn’t gold-digging to us varies greatly based on our values and life experiences.

      • Locke Lamora says:

        That’s what I meant – Bitsy’s comment is the problematic one.
        And perhaps I shouldn’t have called Greenieweenie ignarant. Unaware is maybe better?

      • Timbuktu says:

        @KarEna
        I do feel like a public defender today :-) , and while I also have a PhD and am, therefore, perhaps not entirely objective, I’m not sure why you took it so personally. I don’t think “I have a PhD” means “I’m smarter than you” – not at all. But it does mean “I’m curious and disciplined, I’m used to my opinions being challenged on a daily basis, by both peers and authority figures, I’m used to defending my opinions, instead of just stating them”, etc. So, yeah, when people throw “you’re ignorant” at you, it’s frustrating.

        @Locke Lamora
        I do think “unaware” is better. “Ignorant” to me seems to imply unwillingness to learn. “Unaware” just means you haven’t gotten around to it yet.

      • Lambda says:

        Geenieweenie,
        Jaysus, you’re still confused about the Eastern block. Yugoslavia, not part of it. Albania – same. Ideology is not the same as sphere of influence. And, with the exception of those times when Red Army tanks were rolling in their capitals, all those Eastern block countries were sovereign.

        I don’t have issues with your approach, except if it comes as affirmation instead of inquiry. If you’re curious about Slovenia, ask a Slovene. Croatians will do, too, it seems. My turn to ask, though with little hope of an answer so late in the conversation: I can extrapolate from what I know and I’m curious whether Melania’s family would have been in a better position than even the usual middle class Slovenian. I understand the dad was a sort of local communist boss, and with the collapse people like him were able to translate their place in the former hierarchy into financial benefits and access. Proportionally, she might have been better off than others.

        Finally, my apologies to Bitsy. Your comment was incorrect and irked lot of people, but your heart was in the right place.

      • Nilo says:

        @Timbuktu: Slovenia is not second world. This is, with all due respect, complete rubbish. It’s part of the EU.

      • Timbuktu says:

        @Nilo
        oh, for Christ’s sake.
        For one, I was making a joke – a smiley face was a hint.

        Also:

        “The term Third World arose during the Cold War to define countries that remained non-aligned with either NATO, or the Communist Bloc. The United States, Western European nations and their allies represented the First World, while the Soviet Union, China, Cuba, and their allies represented the Second World. This terminology provided a way of broadly categorizing the nations of the Earth into three groups based on social, political, cultural and economic divisions.

        The Third World was normally seen to include many countries with colonial pasts in Africa, Latin America, Oceania and Asia. It was also sometimes taken as synonymous with countries in the Non-Aligned Movement.”

        Depending on whether Yugoslavia was “aligned” with the USSR or not, it would either be the second world or the third world! So, with all due respect, your comment was complete rubbish, and mine was a tongue-in-cheek reference to the way those terms were originally defined, whether you like it or not. Btw, I think that to this day, no one would refer to Slovenia as “the first world”, which is just as well – the world is too complex to be reduced to 3 chunks.

    • Eric says:

      Sean Spicer said that Melania is not abused verbally, physically, or sexually. PERIOD!

      #alternativefacts

      • Vox says:

        Oh man, greenie. You should see what my paeleoanthropology professor has to say about the bicuspids of homo floresiensis. You couldn’t be more wrong, he’s practically at war with another professor over them lol

        Yeah, have to agree with side-eyeing “centuries behind”. Even in hunter-gatherer cultures that have had comparatively little contact with the outside world there’s evidence of modern conveniences, such as tribes in parts of Africa using automatic rifles to keep away predators. Very few isolated cultures you could accurately say are ‘centuries’ behind. It sucks being from a certain area of Europe. My mother is Russian and that does not impress a lot of people.

    • Ama says:

      What’s going on in this video at the inauguration??? Why are they all first laughing and then happens what?

  2. Megan says:

    Her body language certainly implies that she hates him.

    • Sullivan says:

      It also implies that the man stinks. Can you imagine what that putrid man smells like?

    • Nancy says:

      She had a twenty year plan when she married him, but am quite sure it didn’t include being First Lady. She looks miserable and afraid. Her husband shows no affection to anyone other than his prized possession Ivanka, no one else. He is sociopathic and isn’t capable of love. Reap what you sow Melania. As one of my asides: Some of these right wing commentators insist on comparing her to Jackie O. Yeah she copied the style of Jackie’s inauguration dress, but that’s where the similarities end. She is merely his second trophy wife who he tired of a long time ago.

      • gwen says:

        Don’t forget his second trophy wife, Marla Maples. Melania is his third….

      • marjiscott says:

        THIRD trophy wife! First wife Ivana, then after he tired of her he cheated with Marla Maples, and and now Melania…

      • Nancy says:

        Actually Ivana was the first wife (she had a cameo in The First Wives Club movie), then he got Marla Maples pregnant, married her and she became the first trophy and he shipped her and Tiffany to CA. Then he married Melania his second trophy wife. I’m sure Ivanka should be in this equation somewhere but it is too hurl worthy.

      • Digital Unicorn (aka Betti) says:

        I wouldn’t say Ivanna was a trophy wife – he has described her as more of a business partner than a wife. There is a reason why he show favouritism with her children – he’s basically ignored Tiffany.

      • Shazza says:

        And Marla said he wanted her to abort Tiffany, which probably explains why she seems like the odd man out.

    • gogoboot says:

      I think Melania was on her way out the door if he had not run for President. She looks miserable, when she thinks the cameras aren’t looking. I think she has no VOICE at all within that marriage, between Trump and Ivanka running the show. I think Melania is hardly considered when that family decides things. It’s Donald’s way or the highway.

      Rumours were that he divorced Marla when she allegedly got caught with the bodyguard on the beach in Palm Beach, late at night. Marla’s story was that she stopped to Pee. LOL
      Donald went ballistic, never forgave her.

      • Deeanna says:

        That was no rumor. It was documented by the local police that they approached a man on the beach late at night. Two miles away from Mar-a-lago. At first the man – Marla’s driver/bodyguard – said he was by himself. Then police observed Marla hiding under a lifeguard stand.

        This incident was reported in the newspapers at the time. Trump did not dump her immediately the next day, but he dumped her within the coming year – just in time to avoid paying her a ton more money as per a clause in their pre-nuptial agreement.

        Marla didn’t get all that much and several articles since then indicate that Trump was never overly generous with Tiffany’s mother. As for Tiffany herself, recent articles said he did not provide her with monetary help for her to outfit herself for the inauguration festivities.

        (Which actually made me think of the difference from when the Palin family came to town from Alaska and McCain’s team arranged for a department store to open exclusively for the Palins. And the campaign paid the bills.)

      • Snowflake says:

        One of my co-workers father owned a modeling agency, one marla worked for. My friend said marla was very nice and she mentioned him divorcing her right before the pre_nup increases?Expired? Idk but he screwed her out of a lot of money.

    • Gwen says:

      @ Shazza, “Marla said he wanted her to abort Tiffany” interesting when you think about what he signed today….

  3. Shambles says:

    I believe she is. I didn’t feel that way for a long time, I had no sympathy. But after the inauguration, seeing the photos and videos making the rounds, I believe she’s being abused. I feel horrid for her and I worry about her. She needs support, and even the gracious and wonderful Obamas could see that on sight.

    Her husband, however, has made it clear that he’s going to sign anything that anyone puts in front of him. He’s pure evil. Look at the way he’s psychologically abusing the country. Imagine what she gets at home.

    • Tate says:

      When I saw that video yesterday my jaw dropped and I had no doubt left that she is abused. As far as leaving him, I am sure she has been threatened to play nice or else.

      • original kay says:

        All he’d have to say is “you’ll lever see Barron again” and he could make it happen, with his connections and money.

        Or else just um, do away, with her. I believe he would. I’d believe anything at this point.

      • Bess says:

        In his prior two divorces, he gave up all custody rights to the kids and he kept the Manhattan apartment. He has no interest in actually parenting other than financial support.

        The only reason his 3 oldest children seem to be okay is that they were raised by their mother and nannies. He had nothing to do with it. The same with Tiffany, she was raised 3,000 miles away from him, although she does seem like the black sheep of that clan.

      • Bridget says:

        If he were to go for Barron, it would be specifically to punish Melania. Trump is definitely not above doing that.

      • Lena says:

        @Bess: of course he has not interest in parenting Barron, but do you doubt that he would use him as a way to keep Melania in line? precisely because he doesn’t care he is bake to do that.

      • VirgiliaCoriolanus says:

        To add to what Bess has said–his previous two divorces have been him leaving/cheating and getting with someone new. None of his previous wives have left him.

        So I think it is safe to say that if Melania ever tried to leave–he would take Barron, as a punishment. Because his other (ex) wives toed the line, right up until the end. So it didn’t matter to him.

        I talked a bit about this on FB to some of my relatives——-it’s telling that he picked someone like Melania to marry. With each wife, he went lower down the totem pole in terms of power. We already know that she came here illegal to “model”……………I’m just sayin’.

        Either way, imo, she is not the real problem………….because it’s clear that she is reading from cue cards every time she opens her mouth. The only time I have ever seen anything genuine from her is when she interacts with her son.

      • SM says:

        I feel the same way. You can say she is dumb, she is plastic or a gold digger. yes, but I am starting to feel a bit sorry for her. At least she is honest with herself about what she is and what she really wants from life (careless, lavish life), she does not have an aspiration to achieve something on her own merit (other than hitching a sugar daddy) and hence she displays no enthusiasm whatsoever at the prospect of being in the power position now. And she definitely does not deserve to be picked apart so publicly because she never intended to be so pubic and was definitely not consulted about this life change of hers. You can see the attitude towards women from the Donald right here, his wife has no voice and hence he thinks that he can shut up all the women of the world too. He just wants women to look pretty and smile on comand. No matter that smile hides contempt for you or the fear of you. He is dispicable. And i for one would like people to leave both – her and her son alone. Go attack Ivanka who is a willing participant of her father’s sharade. Even more. She makes his play her own dragging the whole feminist cause down.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        “He has no interest in actually parenting other than financial support.”

        But he is a vengeful man. I could see him keeping “custody”, but sending the kid to boarding school so he doesn’t have to deal with him. Then the mother is left without her child and he keep the power.

        There were so many examples of Trump being a jerk to her, just during the inaugural events. I can’t imagine what goes on behind closed doors.

    • Kitten says:

      This is basically how I feel. Plus, I think you can have some sympathy for her and also acknowledge that she’s not really a VICTIM (unless she is indeed being abused) per se. She made the conscious choice to procreate with pig vomit.

      So whether she’s abused or not I don’t know (it wouldn’t surprise me if she was) but it’s clear that he treats her like shit. I mean, just the fact that she’s obligated to spend time in the same room as this asshole makes me feel sorry for her. If it was any one other than Trump, I probably wouldn’t feel bad but he is a monster.

      • Erinn says:

        I think that’s a lot of it, too. It’s that we can look at Trump and see how horrible he is – and that’s how awful he is in PUBLIC. She’s seeing ‘private’ Trump, and I can’t imagine that’s a cake walk.

        Honestly, I can’t imagine it feels good to see him push his daughter front and center; especially after the speech thing. It’s become pretty clear what the pecking order is in his world, and I feel like Melania and Barron are pretty low on the list.

      • Shark Bait says:

        That’s how I feel as well. She can be a privileged trophy wife that is still horribly mistreated by that slug.

      • Bridget says:

        I for one don’t want to get to a point where I no longer have compassion for someone who is very clearly miserable.

      • Amy says:

        Thank you for articulating what I couldn’t put my finger on, Kitten. As with so many situations, two things can be true at once.

      • I Choose Me says:

        I do think she’s being abused. Psychologically if not physically. As we learned in the Amber/Johnny discussions, there’s no such thing as perfect victims. I believe she’s been gaslighted throughout their entire marriage, her opinions shaped by him. I also have no problem with her just wanting to be a trophy wife. Considering the trade off, being married to Twitler, I don’t begrudge her a single cent. I only hope that if he doesn’t divorce her, she can some how continue to raise Barron with minimal involvement from him.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        I agree, Kitten.

        Bridget, I also really agree with your comment.

    • Erinn says:

      I’m in the same boat. I never used to really have sympathy for her. You make yourself a trophy wife, you’re taken care of, you deal with your husband being away ‘working’ and that sort of thing. When you’re marrying for money, don’t expect to have the perfect happy home. You can expect to have luxurious things, and status, and go fancy places, but you’re probably sacrificing having a wonderful loving husband who is super faithful. Not always, but often.

      But actually watching her in videos? I am starting to feel bad. Because it’s one thing to have a husband who’s married you for your looks, and who you’re not very connected to – but it’s another to feel ‘tolerated’ at best. The way he takes off from the car, heading into the building way ahead of her, how he barely acknowledges her – I just feel sorry for her. Because in normal circumstances, maybe it’s not so bad. But now she’s become FLOTUS and the world is watching you so much more than before. It’s not like she married a politician. She married a scummy real estate guy – she probably never expected to be where she is now.

      I think I can dislike her for who she is, and for how vain and shallow she seems to be, but at the same time feel kind of bad for her. Nobody is 100% awful 100% of the time, and if her biggest fault against her is being too into herself (which she was clearly taught was all she had going for her) and for marrying this psychopath, hopefully she can get involved in something good that will help other people. If she can manage to take this new situation and work towards something that will benefit kids, or whatever, then I guess it’s not a total waste.

      • Maxime DuCamp says:

        @erinn I used to believe “Nobody is 100% awful 100% of the time” but Trump is sure doing a pretty thorough job of it!

    • mia girl says:

      Shambles – You make an excellent point. Trump is psychologically manipulating a large portion of the populace and systematically neggling and gaslighting the rest of us. He is an abuser – so I have no doubt he must be that way in his personal relationships.

    • milla says:

      In the spirit of feminism I was the one who defended her. Yes, Slovenia was not in war, but it was since she was born in Yugoslavia. It was civil war. She lost friends and came to the States to start a new life. Doubt she signed to be the first wife. Doubt she got anything but money and a son, and she clearly loves that boy.

      We never know what is going on behind the closed doors. I also feel bad for HRC and Monica Lewinsky. And to add one thing: I still think if Hilary divorced the old dog, she would get more votes.

      • Crox says:

        She lost friends? In civil war in Yu/Slo? Did I understand that correctly?

        Exactly 6 civilians died in Slovenia’s war for independence. And 6 police officers and 12 soldiers. (These are Slovenian victims, there’s a bit more on YU side, but no civilians; and 2 Austrian reporters.)

      • AnnE says:

        @milla I can feel for HRC as well, to a certain extent but not in this context. HRC was the most vocal and vicious opponent of Monica Lewinsky and any woman involved with her husband. I could overlook the attacks for most of the woman for various reasons, however, I cannot overlook what she did to Monica, a young woman (not much older than her daughter) who made a mistake but never wanted it to be outed. Monica made the mistake of confiding in a trusted friend, a woman who turned out to be a snake. It is the thing that keeps me from embrassing Hilary, she is pro woman until and unless it interfere’s with her ultimate goals. Fortunately I am Canadian so what I think doesn’t matter, however, if I could have voted I would have happily voted Hilary over DT anyday, all day (oops voter fraud) ;) ! Hilary has never once held her husband accountable for his actions (in public that is). I believe theirs is a marriage with “arrangements”, which I do not judge, whatever works for them, they appear to have a mutually loving and respectful marriage and have each others backs, it works for them. It is the same reason I do not have any sympathy for Melania, she know who and what “the Donald” was before she married him, he knew who and what she was before he married her. He was smart enough to get an iron clad pre nup and that is why I believe Melania stays , she is playing the long game (until death due us part). I respect her dedication to her son but she was getting long in the tooth (for someone trying to land a (b)illionaire and had made the “modeling” rounds by the time she met DT, she has made her bed and is prepared to do whatever it takes to reach her goal, no sympathy or rescueing required. If she changes her mind, she can cash out the pre nup and live a very comfortable life. If I am wrong and there is more to it then all she has to do is ask for help, if she cannot afford it she can go to her local Planned Parenthood or woman’s shelter (pun intended).

      • milla says:

        Crox – civil war in one country named Yugoslavia. Slovenia was part of it, so not all her friends were from Slovenia. Imagine someone dividing USA in that way.
        Yugoslavia was one of the most powerful European forces, just imagine the horror of what that looked like. I was a kid, but I am from mixed marriage – Serbian and Croatia. I still have cousins in Bosnia and Slovenia, Portoroz and Kopar. Of course it leaves you hopeless and many people left during or after the war. I do not know a single person who did not have someone in now another country, which was part of Yugoslavia.

      • Crox says:

        Milla: I’m Slovenian, I lived through that war too. And I didn’t know anybody from the now former Yu (and I was old enough). My generation didn’t collectively go to the south anymore (guys perhaps served in the army, but often didn’t socialize with other nations beyond necessities), except those 2 weeks in the summer at Croatian seaside with our families.

        While it is of course possible Melania had friends in ex-Yu countries, don’t treat it as a fact. Quite many of us, especially youngsters (Melania at that point was going to college in Slo, she wasn’t an international model yet) didn’t know anybody down south.

        Slovenia really had it easy (at least in terms of war) then. The Balkans were bloody, but we were really lucky. I can understand how somebody from Croatia, Serbia or Bosnia would of course know many people who died. But we up north were pretty sheltered.

      • KarEna says:

        I’m from an eastern City that is relatively close to Croatia and we have no Croatian friends and family either. We have distant family in Argentina, France, Germany and Austria but there is none on the Balkan site. And as much as I know Croatia, is from the times we drove there to the sea when I was a kid, and it’s the same for most of my friends. So yeah there is a probability that she knew someone or lost someone but the probability is rather small.

      • Crox says:

        That’s the essence of Slovenian-OtherRepublics relations: Croatian seaside. :D

      • KarEna says:

        He he. Yes. That’s where we all get along great for a couple of weeks.

    • SusanneToo says:

      I don’t believe any of his wives have been anything more to him than uteruses and arm candy.

    • Taiss says:

      The way trump attacks anyone who dares to disagree with him, I can only imagine what’s like to be his wife!

    • surprised says:

      I’m genuinely surprised by the community’s comments here. Most of us are women—women who are extremely quick to condemn countless male celebrities who have allegations of abuse and thus voraciously side with their wives/girlfriends.

      The Evil Incarnate in Chief has a long history of abusing his former wives, and this clip above demonstrates to me that Melania is terrified of her husband, and the dancing photos demonstrate her disgust. Whatever you may think of her as trophy wife, and I think we all agree that the Orange Asshole is one of the most unrelentingly vile human beings to have ever ascended to public eye, that many of you are so quick to dismiss Melania’s situation makes me think this whole sisterhood thing we are trying to champion isn’t as tight of a bond as we are deluding ourselves into being. YES she has defended her awful husband’s even more repugnant comments about Obama’s birth certificate and other tirades.

      But she is CLEARLY being abused, whether physically, sexually and emotionally.

      LADIES, do not cast aspersions onto our kin when we are trying to demonstrate that we are #strongertogether. Melania needs help. It’s painfully obvious. Hate her husband, disagree with her life choices, but do not add to the abuse and shaming of someone who is in a fundamentally terrible situation and now isn’t really in a position to do anything about it. I’m sure whatever abuse he is extending upon her has only gotten worse now that he’s grabbed the keys to the highest castle in the land. Women do not need to turn on each other in this moment in time. We need to support and include ALL of us in this fight against this monster.

      • Cacec04 says:

        I agree with you, surprised. I’m the last person to want to give sympathy to anyone in Trump’s entourage, but it’s so easy to stand back and judge Melania. We know actually very little about her background so who is to say she hasn’t been exploited for the majority of her life and that didn’t shape her becoming involved with him in some way? I thought we had all learned from the Johnny/Amber divorce as well that there are no perfect victims but that doesn’t mean they deserve abuse. I give her my sympathy because the same power and control this marriage has over her now may have lead her to marry him in the first place. I can imagine if she wasn’t scare of him before, she’s likely very scared of him now that he’s in one of the most powerful positions in the world. You don’t have to like her, but I’m disappointed in the careless judgements stated about her.

      • jwoolman says:

        I don’t think we can assume we know anything about Melania’s true beliefs about anything and in any case they are irrelevant. She has an abusive husband and is smart enough to not say anything other than what he wants to hear. Most importantly, she has to protect her son. Not only is the vindictive Narcissist-in-Chief quite capable of going for (and winning) full custody out of spite, imagine if he even got joint custody. There’s a child involved who did not ask for this. Look at the body language not only between Trump and Melania, but also between Trump and his youngest child. Children often are intensely loyal to even an abusive parent, futilely hoping for affection. So I can believe that the boy is trying to dress like his dad and says he wants to be a businessman like him. But body language doesn’t lie. Trump only wants a possession, a mirror that will exactly reflect him when he looks at his son. Any deviation will not be well received. This is a typical narcissistic trait also.

        People need to read up on malignant narcissistic spouses. They typically show their true nature only after the marriage is official, so she probably did not know how bad it was going to be. They typically go into rages very easily – we saw him trying to hold it in as he stomped around the stage during the second debate. And they typically are either physically or verbally/emotionally abusive or both. We see how easily he gets angry over nothing. Behind closed doors, he undoubtedly has no restraint.

        Melania is not moving to DC until her abusive husband says he wants her there. Then she will go and try to make the best of it. But if she can stay away from him and protect her child from him (much more easily done in NYC, the White House will be more of a problem keeping them separate), she will. It is highly unlikely that she will risk a divorce until he decides to divorce her himself. Much more than money is at stake.

  4. ida says:

    she said in an interview “don’t pity me”. and that is exactly what I do. I feel sorry for all the women who will suffer under the Trump administration and have no choice.

    • Nicole says:

      Exactly. She’s not some helpless victim now. She’s been married to this guy for ages and he’s no different now. She doesn’t need my sympathy…everyone else does.

  5. Snowflake says:

    Her job as trophy wife is just a bit harder. But not much, she’s not moving into the WH. I don’t believe she ever will. I doubt her and the Donald sleep in the same room, maybe not ever the same apartment. She just has to show up to major events but that will lessen as people get used to seeing Ivana by his side. No sympathy here.

    • L84Tea says:

      Yeah, it’s very weird. I feel like Ivanka is the First Lady.

      • Elisa the I. says:

        One of the (high-quality) newspapers in my country used a pic of Trump and Melania with the caption: Trump dancing with his wife Ivanka. ;)
        I have no clue whether it was a genuine mistake or some very nice shade, but it made me giggle.

      • ol cranky says:

        am I the only one who noticed that very weird interaction between Ivanka and her dad? It looks like Tump and Pence are turning around to look at Melania but if you watch Ivanka, she smiles & raises her eyebrows while looking at her father and I think he’s actually looking at her, not his wife

  6. MunichGirl says:

    Has anyone here seen this clip about Melania and Donald?

    https://twitter.com/Green_Footballs/status/823632636048527360

  7. Insomniac says:

    I don’t think she’s a victim by any means, but if I had any doubts about whether she wanted any of this, Friday eradicated them. She’s about the least enthusiastic First Lady I’ve ever seen.

  8. Jeesie says:

    I feel bad for her. She just wanted a rich husband who’d leave her alone most of the time. She didn’t sign up for this at all, and she did as little as possible for her husbands campaign. She obviously never thought he’d actually win.

    She’s always looked so miserable, and we know Trump is a violent sexual abuser, so I don’t think a little empathy goes astray. She still has a young child with the man, and now he’s practically a dictator so leaving just got a whole lot more fraught.

    Anyway, she’s opting out of being First Lady as much as she possibly can while still being his legal wife. She doesn’t want the job or attention, and the people attacking her for that don’t actually want her as First Lady anyway, so why not just leave her be?

    • cedar falls says:

      This was his FOURTH attempt at a presidential run and her former profession was “nude model”. She was a woman both forewarned that he had political aspirations and hungry for the spotlight when she married him.

      No sympathy whatsoever, especially after she lied through her teeth about immigrating “the right way” (with implied racist overtones) and minimised his boasts of sexual assault.

      • Fergus says:

        Yes. I mean, I get feeling sympathy for an abuse victim, regardless of who the victim is (I don’t buy into the perfect victim narrative), but where did this myth of she didn’t know he had presidential aspirations and didn’t sign up for this come from? Perhaps she never thought he’d win (but somehow I doubt she has ever thought critically enough about how campaigning and politics work in the US to come to that conclusion). But she certainly knew it was one of his goals. He’s been hiring advisors to help plan a run for the WH since the 90s! This isn’t new.

  9. Brunswickstoval says:

    She looks like she is genuinely repulsed by him. But no I have no sympathy. I reserve that for the millions of women now unable to access birth control.

  10. Digital Unicorn (aka Betti) says:

    That clip is sad – i agree that she knew what she was getting into when she married him knowing what kind of man he was but knowing and living the nightmare are different things. Her reality is probably much worse than she imagined and she was always going to be willing to put up with a lot to get the lifestyle she wanted but still she’s a person who is in a nasty situation. I have some empathy for her.

    Also Trump screwed over his previous ex’s so if she were to walk away she wouldn’t get much financially even with Barron – there will be an iron clad prenup. Even is she were to walk away she doesn’t have a career or business of her own to fall back on – I think she’ll hang on until Barron is old enough to provide for her. Sad I know but from most accounts she’s not well educated and had no other career skills/options than modelling. She clearly just wants to be a mother and kept wife – nothing wrong with that if you own it and she does.

    • Kiki says:

      @Digital Unicorn. I agree with you 100%.

    • swak says:

      She has a jewelry business and there are reports that it is very successful. He won’t keep her long once he is no longer president.

    • Sixer says:

      I concur.

      Even if a woman’s sum ambition in life is to become a gold-digging trophy wife, this does not make her being in an abusive relationship something we shouldn’t care about.

      (Not speculating on whether this particular example is or isn’t abuse cos not sure I think it’s helpful.)

      • jwoolman says:

        Exactly. I don’t care if she was or wasn’t a “gold digger”. I don’t care what her personal political beliefs are. She still has the fundamental right to not be abused.

        I don’t think she can safely walk out because of the power he has to take her son. Once Barron is an adult, she will regain some freedom of choice.

    • Diana says:

      Agree 100%. She has it all materially, but sold her soul. I’d never want to trade places with her.

  11. S says:

    Zero sympathy. Not even trophy wives tend to marry men they actually, actively despise and disagree with everything they stand for (see: Wendi Deng). She’s spoken up and defended him at every turn, and spouted her own long list of lies and half-truths (I have a college degree, wrote the speech myself, always worked in U.S. legally, we’ll have a press conference about my immigration status). She’s selfish enough to put the entire city of New York out and cost taxpayers millions of dollars, simply to satisfy her own whims. She’s part and parcel of the marriage and a legal adult (older than me!), with resources I could never dream of possessing. She sits idly by while her husband bullies others and is as quick to sue (a.k.a. bully those with less money and power) as he is. They may secretly hate each other, but they’re still playing nice for the public and she’s definitely involved in this con. Zero sympathy for Melania; all the sympathy in the world for all the women already and soon-to-be hurt or killed thanks to her husband’s heartless policies.

    • Jag says:

      Well said!

    • Shark Bait says:

      Very true.

    • Belle Epoch says:

      I still remember the photo shoot in the golden apartment with Barron’s golden baby carriage and Melania all glammed up – it was a horrible in-your-face we-are-soooooo-rich display of crass over-the-top smugness. It was like “look at me! I have more money than all of Slovenia now!” If Melania did ANY charitable work with all that money, or represented any helpful organization, or showed any interest in anyone other than herself and Barron, THEN I might feel more sympathetic. She might be secretly donating to the Metropolitan, but that isn’t the Trump way. All Donald contributes to is portraits of himself. And talking about bullying when your husband is a GIANT bully does not show much awareness. I imagine Barron gets picked on a lot so she can relate to that issue. She made a deal with the devil and it isn’t working out so well.

      • Jayna says:

        Before Trump ran for president and was nominated, her twitter feed was just glamorous photos of herself, her latest updo, their trip to wherever, etc. It was just Melania-centric regarding her beauty, nothing deep. She liked her superficial wealthy life, hobnobbing with the rich, and being a mother to Barron, jetting off to their other homes.

        Trump’s offices were in the same building. He would take an elevator to his offices. Trump socializes, but he was also in many ways a homebody. I think Trump and Melania were doing just fine until he got the nomination and it became clear he might win. Let’s not forget he went home every night during running for office.

        I don’t think they lived separate lives until recently. I think she’s miserable and overwhelmed and will be in the background. Even the First Lady’s offices are being turned into First Family offices. She will put her name on some issue to get behind that Ivanka probably picks out, but won’t do much. Ivanka is in the forefront, and that suits Melania just fine.
        She will adjust and suck it up for four years, dreaming of when she gets to go back to their previous life.

      • Bethy says:

        @jayna I thought I read somewhere that Trump’s children always had a separate floor for them and their nannies and he never spent time with when they were little. Hence why poor Barron doesn’t need the swing set at the WH, as Dear Leader isn’t going to be out there playing with his kid.

        Also didn’t Ivana and Trump have separate rooms for most of their marriage?

      • Jayna says:

        @Bethy, I doubt Trump spent much time with any of his kids and agree, they probably had their own wing.

        Why would Barron want that swing set? He’s a tween and a big kid. I doubt he and his friends hang out on swing sets.

        Ivana was often away from home, running the casinos . The kids had the nannies to take care of them back in NYC. Trump did his thing. I would believe they had separate bedrooms, but I have no clue. They had a long marriage, and their marriage probably changed over time.

    • jwoolman says:

      You’re forgetting that Trump’s avowed political beliefs change with the wind. He was originally a Democrat and their platform seemed to resonate with him especially on social issues. His children were even registered as Democrats until dad hopped into the Republican ring recently. He urged his second wife to have an abortion (she refused, hence Tiffany exists). He very likely paid for plenty of abortions in his life, remember when he claimed his Vietnam was braving the possibility of getting STDs?!? All the things he promised in the campaign trail were contradicted by things he said earlier in his career and not necessarily that long ago. Well, he’s always disliked blacks….

      But really, which Trump did she marry anyway? He was always fluctuating. And who would believe that such a fool would end up as President? Half the country didn’t believe it even after the Republicans were stupid enough to nominate him. So it makes sense that Melania thought running for President was just a harmless hobby, like golf.

    • jwoolman says:

      A woman who had a date with Donald after meeting him in a bar said he was actually a reasonable date and conversationalist. She was in her early twenties, he was a few years older. He still owes her money, she paid for dinner because they didn’t take credit cards and he didn’t have much cash on him…. She suggested lightheartedly that they should just wash dishes for the meal (“It will be fun!”) – he looked rather horrified. So he was humor-deficient even back then (not a sign of a bad person, it’s just a handicap). He kept apologizing for it all and promising to reimburse her but then he obviously “forgot” about it. Anyway, in the courting phase when he was younger he probably knew enough to be charming rather than bullying. Flaming narcissists generally are like that. They seem nice and attentive during courtship, and their true selves emerge only after the wedding. It’s a very common pattern. So I can believe his wives didn’t see the real Donald until much later, maybe even after they became pregnant. Read stories by women with husbands who had narcissistic personality disorder to see how it works – they feel rather blindsided and have a tough time figuring out what happened.

    • Marianne says:

      But perhaps she has to say that or face the repercussions.

  12. Jenns says:

    I don’t feel bad for her. No one should feel bad for her. Don’t forget she supported her orange husband’s birther movement against Obama.

    • nicole says:

      Jenns, I agree, she does and says everything he tells her to, she is a kept woman, and she deserves what she gets.

      • Shambles says:

        She deserves what she gets?

        We have no idea what she’s “getting” behind closed doors. If what we’ve seen in public of who her husband is, what his temperament is like, and how he treats her is any indication, it could be pretty awful. I don’t know, but it could.

        So I think it’s pretty dangerous to say she deserves what she gets.

  13. bleu_moon says:

    Remember when asked if she would have married Trump if he wasn’t rich and she replied with, “Would he have married me if I wasn’t beautiful?” I was looking for the original source on that and stumbled over this Celebitchy article from 2010 about Melania staying in NY and not traveling with Trump. They blamed it on their son’s schooling at age 4.

    http://www.celebitchy.com/90955/are_donald_melania_trump_having_relationship_troubles/

    I don’t think she wanted to be First Lady, but she knew what she was getting herself into otherwise. As my Gran used to say, “Marry for money and you’ll earn every penny.”

  14. Adele Dazeem says:

    Impeachment is the LAST THING WE WANT. that would lead to a pence presidency, which to me is faaar worse.

    • Kitten says:

      I disagree.

      You don’t actually think that these ideas are Trump’s do you? It’s Pence and Co calling the shots because Tinkles doesn’t know shit about political policy or how to run a country. Additionally, his political ideology has always been all over the place, ranging from liberal to conservative, depending on how he’s feeling at the moment.

      So we basically have a Pence presidency now anyway.
      Personally, I’d rather remove the crazy-ass lunatic from the situation. As I’ve said many times around here: I’d rather stick with the devil I know than the devil I don’t know.

      Because there’s terrible political policy (which is bad enough) and then there’s terrible political policy and a potential WWIII.

      (Hopefully Pence doesn’t have Twitter)

      • Tate says:

        I agree, Kitten. Pence is running things now. Trump makes things easier to do what he wants because Trump is a constant clown show leaving nobody to pay attention to what Pence and his group of religious nut job men are doing. Remove the clown show and then we can focus on what is being done.

      • Megan says:

        Yep, we’re getting Pence’s domestic agenda no matter what. It’s Trump foreign policy agenda that really scares the crap out of me.

      • S says:

        I disagree with just about every single thing Pence fundamentally believes in, and 100% of his policy proposals, all of which are designed to turn us into a nation governed by and for billionaires with fundamentalist Christian morals and science-phobic ideas legally imposed on everyone else. BUT he’s not insane. He can be (somewhat) shamed. He cares about voters voting for him, so they have SOME leverage. He has a modicum of respect for the position of president and the norms of American politics and politicians. He’s a far-right, ultra-conservative politician, who lies with impunity for his boss, but knows he IS lying. He doesn’t believe the delusions. He won’t need to be babysat like a petulant toddler who would rather be ranting on Twitter, chatting with Kayne and watching CNN than doing boring president stuff. He won’t get us into a nuclear war because someone said he had small hands. Pence is the absolute worst presidential choice in history, bar one, which happens to be the one we have right now.

      • Jenns says:

        Pence is terrible. He is a man that I don’t want as our President.

        However, Pence is not going to send out his press secretary on day one to argue about crowd sizes. We cannot trust Trump on anything. What if there is an attack on the US? Can we trust Trump on who attacked us? How large the terrorist group is? Spicer refused to acknowledge the unemployment rate yesterday. Do you think that Trump is going to allow the unemployment rate under his presidency look bad? We could have a rate over 10% and he’ll tell everyone that it’s at a 1%. He just makes crap up. He is a chronic liar. This man cannot lead our country. And that is the only reason why Pence is better.

      • Jag says:

        @Jenns – Unfortunately, Pence might do the same. Not terribly long ago, Congress made it so that propaganda is legal here in the U.S., i.e. the type that is used in other countries to sway people. I can’t remember if they approved or didn’t re-approve something, but it’s legal now. And with all of the current Trumpidiots out there who believe anything, knowing that they might be reading government-sanctioned propaganda is terrifying to me. (I think that Pence would allow it, just as Trump would.)

        I hate Pence and think that Trump is a madman who might cause World War III so it’s a terrible choice for us to make between them.

      • Kelly says:

        A Pence presidency would be truly scary for women, LGBT people, and anyone who has a secular mindset. However, Pence is more even tempered and less likely to declare WW3 via Twitter.

      • Lightpurple says:

        Pence has been omnipresent in Trump’s photos when a normal VP wouldn’t be seen. Pence is behind all the executive orders and legislative paperwork he is signing. Trump wouldn’t know what “Reagan’s Mexico City Rule” was if it jumped up and bit his arm iff

      • Jayna says:

        Don’t ever discount Jared, Ivanka’s husband. I think he is the one who is going to be wielding the most power, more than Pence.

      • Fergus says:

        The problem is: Pence is an experienced politician. He’s been in office for years. He knows how to behave in front of a camera. While yes, he’s the man behind the man, his policy views are actually WORSE than Trump’s. Trump’s ego might keep some of them at bay. But if Pence got to be President? Pence who knows how to play the game? Pence who is well-spoken? Pence who is relatively attractive and looks good on camera? Pence who has long, built-up relationships? Pence who is very competent politician? Pence who knows how to hide corruption? Pence who is a well-established member of the party? While sure, there’s probably less chance of WWIII with Pence, a Pence presidency would make *worse* attacks on civil rights, civil society. I read somewhere, Trump wants to just make money and get his ego stroked. Pence has an agenda. Read again: Pence is a well-established member of the Rebublican party. While both Dems and Reps don’t like Trump, Pence does not face the same lack of support. Pence would never get impeached. He would be able to pass his agenda with little to no resistance. Pence is not an easy icon to rally against. Under Pence, we would have to rally even harder because image isn’t outlandish and garish. He could much more easily win a second term. He’s endorse. He’s legitimized. And he is a disaster for civil rights.

        I read this in a blog I can’t remember, but I quote (paraphrase): “The jokes comparing Trump to Emperor Palpatine–compared to Pence, Trump is Jar-Jar Binks. Pence is Palpatine.”

    • Liz says:

      Pence’s policies will be essentially the same as Trump’s, but missing the kleptocracy aspect. I suspect that Prebius ,Bannon & Pence are drafting most of the policy and selecting the nominees for Trump to rubber stamp.

      • S says:

        Policy, yes, most likely, nominees, not as much. Trump is staffing his “reality show” of a presidency all himself. He wants people that “look” the part and has said that very thing many times. He’s made some real left field choices (left meaning outside the norms, not at all politically) that the mainstream Republicans are struggling to get behind.

        Trump is all about the visuals. He’s definitely not gonna read policy papers or suss that out — the titles and slogans maybe he’ll comment on. But the people? He’s all over that. He considers them his staff.

      • Miss Melissa says:

        I don’t think Pence is anti NATO or pro Russia, however. Meanwhile, Russia is moving nukes closer to NATO nations.

      • Liz says:

        Trump doesn’t know Betsy DeVos from a hole in the wall. She was a Preibus/Pence pick. Same for Jeff Sessions. Trump got to pick from a short list for some positions, but generally, he didn’t/doesn’t know the players well enough to be able to make the nominations without a lot of guidance.

      • S says:

        @Liz, ha! He knows Betsy DeVos gave more money to his campaign and SuperPacs supporting him than any other single donor and has lady bits, so she counts as “diversity” in his lily white male cabinet. Plus, you know, women if not at home, belong in a classroom. That job was a quid pro quo, period.

        Jeff Sessions shares LOTS of Trump’s views and was the first D.C. Republican to support him.

        Were they suggested by people around him? Absolutely. But Trump picks his own people; those around him manipulate him into picking who they want him to (because he’s a toddler), but he doesn’t always fall in line. Sometimes he does though … That’s how he ended up with Pence.

      • SusanneToo says:

        @Liz. Actually, Sessions was the only legislator who had his nose up trump’s ass from Day One. Sessions orchestrated trump’s campaign kickoff right here in Mobile. I’m 25 miles outside downtown and I could still smell the stench of trump, sessions and the cultists. There was no question that sessions would be rewarded.

      • AnneC says:

        I agree that Pence is not insane and will not get us into world war 3. Most importantly, he would hopefully get rid of Steve Bannon, who is Trump’s insane Breitbart conspiracy nut whisperer. That man combined with Trump really scares me.

    • SusanneToo says:

      Would pence be stupid enough to say to the CIA “maybe we’ll still take the Iraqi oil?” trump’s stupidity and diarrhea mouth will start WW3.

      • Giddy says:

        Also, CBS learned that Trump took his own audience of about 40 people to the CIA and sat them in the front. I wondered why the CIA people were applauding and laughing so enthusiastically. They weren’t. Now there are reports that his appearance there with his tam audience worsened that situation. I’m sure he did that to pander to the public who would see the news clips, but has a President ever provided his own laugh track before? Sad.

      • SusanneToo says:

        He took his own audience to his press conference also. Apparently, he has to have a laughtrack with him wherever he goes.

      • Eric says:

        When Genghis Con brings people with him to laugh/clap/nod in approval that’s called a “claque.”
        It’s a legit new term now.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        Yes, threatening to take oil by military force while at the same time nominating the head of Exxon oil to Secretary of State. Chilling.

    • I'mScaredAsHell says:

      Please remember that he must be impeached and removed from office. He can be impeached and still remain President.

    • nicole says:

      I could have anybody else as president, but that orange clown, I hate him that much.

  15. minx says:

    Nope, nope.

  16. Kiki says:

    I knew something about Melania Trump when she step on that podium to talk at the RNC conversion last year. She is not that poised or confident like Michelle Obama, but she is gracious. However, she definitely doesn’t want to be First Lady. Do I feel sorry for her ? Yes I do, she was probably emotionally abused by Donald Trump (no surprised there) and the pressure to be First Lady would be tremendous….

    Even though I hate her Baby Fist husband (p.s your country is beginning to go to shreds), i really feel bad for her.

    • Kitten says:

      She does come across as gracious but I can’t tell whether it’s genuine or just good manners.

      • Miss M says:

        Kitten, maybe a bit of both?! But if I had to choose is due to good manners.

      • Christin says:

        She knows how to play a role in public, it seems. Her interviews seem to show a harder side.

        She wants it known she is independent and ‘they’ cannot tell her what to do. I think they have certain similarities.

  17. YepIsaidit says:

    She could leave at anytime but the prenup probably sucks for her. So she stays.

  18. K.T says:

    No. Please do not make a victim of a non-elected political figure who endorses and benefits from a kleptocracy and a new form of US fascism.

    • Lyka says:

      I don’t think anyone is. Most people are just expressing pity for a woman who could be in a very bad situation. It’s nowhere near an exact correlation, but lots of people cried “gold-digger” when Amber Heard married Depp, but then turned around to support her when evidence of his abuse came out. It’s not my place to judge or make assumptions about abuse in the Trump marriage, but Trump does have a long, documented history of sexual misconduct and violence toward women. That much is fact.

      I also don’t like Melania or what she stands for. I don’t like that she quietly benefits from the reign of a monster whose policies will damage the lives of millions of women. I don’t like that she’s absconded herself from responsibility. But watching the inauguration day clips and knowing what kind of man Donald is, I do pity her.

  19. Iknowwhatboyslike says:

    I feel sorry for the many women around the world and in America who will be deprived healthcare because of her husband and his party. We just learned that black women, in America, die at a larger rate of Cervical Cancer than any other race. But Mrs. Trump’s husband will defund Planned Parent, which provide women with not just abortions. It’s a place where women without insurance coverage can go to get their Pap smear and breast exams. When they are defunded, what happens to those women? And that’s in America! What about the many women in poor nations, like India, countries in Africa and the like? He just signed an executive order to refuse money to NGOs that not only provide abortions, but just the mentioning of abortion to women. He just single handedly sentenced a unfathomable amount of women to death. Where was Melania when he signed that? Did she tell him how wrong he was? I don’t know. But I don’t feel sorry for this woman. She willingly married him. He was a horrible human being before he became president.

    • Jag says:

      Agreed!

    • Embee says:

      I also feel sorry and worried about women losing their healthcare. The problem with Trump supporters and Planned Parenthood, is that so many think it’s just for abortiòns. I’ve read so many ridiculous people saying it’s unnecessary and women should be more careful. These are probabĺý people who won’t ĺosè their insurance

      • Cee says:

        It’s funny cause last time I checked men are a vital part in causing a pregnancy. Ignorance (sometimes it’s ignorance and not just carelessness) goes both ways.

      • Jessica says:

        PP helps preventing unwanted pregnancies for God’s sake. I have a previous condition and had no health insurance for a year. Where could I go for women’s health issues? PP.

    • Cee says:

      Planned Parenthood took me in when I was an exchange student and helped me get rid of a cyst that was threatening my ovary and prevenying me from lifting a small suitcase. My college’s health care wasn’t great and my international one was too expensive for the little it helped me out when I needed it.

      Women not seeing anything wrong with defundind PP are blinded by their privilege. Too much money to get treatments privately and/or abroad, or insulated by their extreme religious views. And some men don’t even care. Not their problem.

      • Embee says:

        @cee quite a few commenters are male of course. What would they know about how important and expensive these things are? I even read women say they don’t know what we’re upset about and what we think is being taken away! I’m glad Planned Parenthood was fortunately still around and able to help you

      • Cee says:

        Those men apparently do not have sisters, friends, girlfriends or wives. They must have sprouted from a cabbage not a vagina.

      • Embee says:

        @cee they might see how important it is to have one day if their wife or girlfriend needs it and it’s gone. Then they’ll ŕemember the guy they wanted as president took it away

      • Gwen says:

        @Cee , exactly, some woman who have no/bad healthcare (despite having a job and working hard) need some other help than abortion. PP is way more than only abortion, and thinking about woman who can’t afford birth control, well maybe they should refuse to have sex, until the boyfriend/husband pays for birthcontrol, would be interesting, when many woman would do that…

    • Original T.C. says:

      Black women also have the HIGHEST death rate from Breast Cancer than any other race. Even though White women have a higher rate of diagnosis. So limited access to get mammograms and get treatment when tumor position.

      https://www.cdc.gov/cancer/breast/statistics/race.htm

  20. original kay says:

    I really vacillate.

    But I think I am going to come down on the side of sympathy.

    Why? we know that abuse has no economic boundaries. Having the money to leave does not mean the freedom to leave.
    And the big- he hoodwinked half a nation, pretty much. It’s totally conceivable that he gaslighted her, regardless of facts in her face. Matter of fact, I’d bet on it.

    The big reason? Since I don’t know her, I have to go on pictures, and other people’s reaction. Because I have unlimited respect for the Obamas, and I watched how they treated her, I will go with their judgement. I don’t think they had their arms around her for show, that was genuine. The both did it, at the same time, in a protective/welcoming stance.

    • Kitten says:

      Same. I don’t mind that people feel no sympathy for her though. I’m not trying to shame anyone into feeling bad for this lady.

    • ArtHistorian says:

      Agree.

      Furthermore, I don’t think that Trump is the kind of man that’ll take kindly to being left. He’s vicious and vindictive – imagine what he would do if he felt that he has been humiliated in front of the world by his wife?

    • Shark Bait says:

      That is where I am, today. There is no perfect victim. Even if there is no textbook abuse, I’m sure he is a terrible person to everyone around him (except for golden child Ivanka maybe).
      Plus, I have sympathy for anyone who would have to see him naked. Even if it was just once.

  21. MPar says:

    I’m sticking up for the First Lady here… I had the same looks as she, we’ll call her “RBF” (resting bitch face) until I turned 40 and went to the eye doctors!! Lord, behold!!! I needed glasses!!! Yup!! I didn’t need them for my whole life…. Now in all my candid pics my face is calm and not harsh since my vision was corrected and I no longer looked like I was straining not due to hate but due to my poor eye sight.. so my advice to her is she must go see an Ophthalmologist!!!! I’m being SERIOUS, changed my life.

    • Crumpet says:

      I think she is nervous. I watched all of the footage of the balls, and she definitely smiled and interacted with the audience from time to time, but never kept a full smile on her face. She may be trying to appear as though she is taking this seriously and to not appear frivolous. I too hope that she will be a very present and active during her husband’s presidency. I have no doubt that President Trump must be a hard man to live with – he is a workaholic. In the photo above she is pulled back so she can smile at him – the rest of the time they held each other close during the dance.

    • Lambda says:

      Wife of billionaire doesn’t know she needs a vision check and would do well to follow advise on the internet! Gurrrl!

      Still, that doesn’t explain why her face just fell in the first video. That video makes me cringe and bothers me. Especially because he seems to take pleasure in saying something nasty and bulldoze her during a public occasion.

      Crumpet, nice insertion of ‘president’ Trump. You mean meinfuhrer/leader/duce/kommandant?

  22. Jayna says:

    I don’t feel sorry for Melania overall. I feel sorry for her in the sense that she liked her life and didn’t want him to be POTUS and move to D.C. and live a very different life, Secret Service, etc., but she will adjust.

    But people think Melania will divorce Donald one day. Nevah! She is on the arm of a billionaire and lives a swanky life, but loves her identity as Donald Trump’s wife. She gets divorced in her late 40s after this is over. What is she? An aging rich single woman in a city (NYC) that the men go after younger women. Christy Brinkley has been single since around 50 and she talks about men want younger women in that town.

    Or, she could stay with Donald after his four-year term is over (or shorter if we’re lucky), and go back to her life of living in opulence and jetting between huge estates. He’s never running for a second term. So, at most, it would be four years, unless he’s impeached or walks off the job. Even with the length of their marriage, with an iron tight prenup, and including child support, her lifestyle would be a mere pittance to what it is now if she divorces him. Do you really think she is going to give up that lifestyle and want to wade back into the awful socialite dating game in NYC and probably end up with a toad even worse than him?

    Don’t Cry for Melania. She will stay in the background, not bothering anyone.. She will come out in classier or more conservative designer wear (than her usual plunging dresses before Donald’s nomination) for occasions and will be talked about in all the fashion magazines, and she will begin to enjoy all the attention bestowed upon her as First Lady.

  23. BearcatLawyer says:

    I do not feel badly for her. She could choose to leave and make her way in the world, just like millions of other divorced, middle-aged mothers without college degrees must do every darn day. She would not have the same lifestyle she enjoys now, but she presumably has some friends and connections she cultivated as Mrs. Trump who would help her. At the very least she might land a better trophy wife gig.

    Melania chooses to stay. She chooses to explicitly and implicitly support Trump’s actions and behaviour. She chooses to inconvenience millions of New York City residents. She is just as blind and tone deaf as he is.

  24. Snack time says:

    Catch Ivanka behind her, exact same thing…mega smile when he turns around and just collapse when he face back front.

  25. Sales says:

    I’ve always said that I can’t blame her for not wanting to be First Lady. Isn’t servicing him job enough?

  26. Liz says:

    I really don’t pity her. I know too many trophy wives like her – sticking it out because there is too much to lose. She knew what she was signing up for when she married him – she was the third wife and knew how he treated the first two. But she has made her choices. Yes, she is likely miserably aware of the differences between her marriage and the Obama’s clearly much healthier relationship. I think that helped make Friday so much worse for her – she was putting on a act and having to do it next to a couple for whom the affection is obviously real.

    No, she doesn’t want to be First Lady and hell will freeze over before she moves to DC. That’s her choice, however, she is asking the taxpayers to subsidize that choice. That’s what makes me so angry. And yes, the traffic problems are serious. But those of us who live here learned to deal with traffic a long time ago. It’s dealing with the expense that is truly galling to us.

    • Jayna says:

      Well, the second one, Marla, actually humiliated him by cheating on the beach with her bodyguard. LOL His ego must have been crushed on that one. Not that she was with another man, because he only loves himself. But that his wife would humiliate him in such a fashion and be caught and for the whole world to know.

      • Whiskeyjack says:

        Jayna, didn’t the guy Marla cheated with end up dead not long after? Could’ve sworn that’s what I heard. Kind of scary if it’s true. 😨

      • Christin says:

        Memories! I remember those tabloid headlines when it happened. All the attempts to paint him as the greatest rich playboy, and she is caught on a beach at 4 AM with hired help. From ‘best I ever had’ (gag) to the beach tryst.

      • Jayna says:

        @Christin, it’s quite comical, really. He had to pretend it was false to save face and then wait a little time before they divorced.

  27. BJ says:

    I saw a clip yesterday of her basically supporting the “birther” movement,questioning President Obama’s citizenship.So nope
    If she wants to sleep with the devil, have at it.

  28. Josefina says:

    I feel bad for the sheer ammount of xenophobic and mysoginistic comments thrown her way by the very people who shun those things. Those comments were the reason I stopped following Melania stories.

  29. Amelia says:

    I’m ashamed of some of the comments here. Of course I pity her. I think she is being abused, it seems very clear and I think the Obamas picked up on and seemingly looked out for her. Who knows what for sure is keeping her with him. Blackmail? Threats against Barron? He’s a heinous being and I can only imagine what he has said and done to her. So what she’s not thrilled being First Lady, maybe she just wants to be a SAFE LADY away from him. She has money, but it’s HIS. Even wealthy women have a hard time leaving abusive relationships (Nigella Lawson anyone?). Let’s have some pity on her. Don’t blur the line between him and her bc I think we all know what evil he is capable of and she is more likely a victim than an accomplice

    • Kitten says:

      But you can’t force your sensibilities on other people.
      You can’t shame or guilt someone into feeling empathy–they either feel it or they don’t.
      Despite myself, I happen to feel sorry for her but I think the reasons for people NOT feeling sorry for her are perfectly valid. People are understandably angry right now without a lot of sympathy for this woman left in their reservoir.

      *shrugs*

      • Amelia says:

        You’re right, I can’t, but I can still think they are holding her to a double standard of her tyrant husband.

      • S says:

        Nah, there’s plenty that make me unsympathetic to her, all on her own…

        -Her utterly and totally selfish desire to remain in New York City despite hundreds of years of American tradition, the incalculable inconvenience for millions of New Yorkers, hundreds of millions of taxpayer dollars and the negative impact on any midtown business that isn’t her husband’s. <<<—No, I don't think she "deserves" to stay, nor do I think it's "no big deal." She's putting her, and her son's, whims — because, let's face it, moving into the White House is not a "hardship" by any definition — ahead of millions of people at huge cost to the public.

        -She plagiarized a speech she claimed to have "written herself" and then threw someone else under the bus for it.

        -She echoed her husband's birtherism and said she, too, believed Barack Obama was born outside the United States. (The hypocrisy of a white immigrant assuming a black man can't be born in this country, indicates she shares her husband's ignorant, racist viewpoint.)

        -She defended her husband's "locker room talk" and called women who accused him liars, specifically naming and shaming them.

        -She herself lied in her official bio multiple times, including claiming to have a college degree, which she does not.

        -She claims to be against Internet bullying, while knowing her husband is the biggest, meanest cyber troll around.

        -She claimed, way more than once, that she never worked illegally in the United States, when her own words and arrival timeline show she did (as many models do). She suffered ZERO consequences for this, and never even fulfilled her promise to hold a press conference to "prove" she worked legally. (Because she can't; because she didn't.)

        -She made charity bids in her own name and then didn't follow through on her pledges, just like her husband, and/or illegally used her husband's foundation money to pay for them.

        -She routinely sues people who say things she doesn't like, using her money and power to stifle other's speech.

        -She participated in disgusting public sex talk on Howard Stern, giggling while saying absolutely disgusting things that I'd think less of any woman for publicly bragging about, let alone when talking about doing those things with Donald Trump.

        -Her soft-core porn pics, at the very least, show extremely poor judgement. (She was not a starving refugee; she comes from a very middle class, to upper-middle class, stable background by all accounts; those pics were a choice, not a financial necessity.)

        -She not only willingly married Donald Trump, she actively pursued him for that ring and got what she wanted. Lie down with dogs, get up with fleas.

      • Gwen says:

        @ S, Amen!

  30. robyn says:

    Some folks think Melania is a victim but I don’t. She said loud and clear during an interview that she is 100 percent behind her husband. She seemed genuinely concerned about the mean press her hubby was getting. She blamed Billy Bush for the “locker room” talk. She slipped on a pussy bow blouse as debate wear. She knew her husband was sending a string of Bill Clinton accusers to throw off Hillary during that same debate. She’s come a long way from being a porn model and she is quite happy with the results of marrying Drumpf.

    The slow down of the video is kind of creepy though.

  31. Eric says:

    Of all the women to feel sorry for, Melania is at the bottom of my list. PERIOD!

    • Zan says:

      Yup. I’m far more concerned for lots of other women–like the millions in this country who will lose their healthcare, and millions more around the world who will lose out on the medical info they can even be told about because of this administration. And that’s just what’s been put into motion in the first few days!

  32. dodgy says:

    Nope, no sympathy. What’s that old saying, “Never marry for money, you can borrow it cheaper.” She made her bed and is now lying on it. No sympathy from me!

  33. lightpurple says:

    Her husband signed the Global Gag Order yesterday, which will impact the healthcare of millions of women around the world, yesterday. He did it surrounded by men. On Friday, he signed an executive order that will allow health insurers to discriminate against women when setting rates in addition to denying them coverage for treatment for certain ailments like endometriosis and ovarian cysts. On Sunday, he tweeted insults at women and their exercise of their first amendment rights to free speech and assembly. I’m a little bit more concerned about his impact on a lot of other women right now. Although I do wish her well.

    • robyn says:

      So true. Women are fleeing war torn countries. Women are sick and worry about health care. Women are wondering how to pay their bills while working hard but making a poverty salary. Melania doesn’t deserve a drop of concern unless she is willing to raise the minimum wage and join in Women’s Marches against her p*ssygrabbing husband.

    • Kitten says:

      That pic of all the white dudes gleefully reinstating the GGO made me wanna throw up.

    • Iknowwhatboyslike says:

      Thank you!!! Also, it isn’t like Melania is in some arranged marriage and was forced to marry Donald Trump. She dated him, then married him willingly. I’m sure he was a jerk when they were dating and despite that, she married this horrible man anyway. If was really abused, and wanted to leave with Baron, during the campagin was the prime time to do it. He is under so much scrutiny that it would have been impossible for him to get away with his bad behavior.

  34. Bubbles says:

    I do feel bad for her. I think she signed up for being a trophy wife/mail order bride but being FLOTUS is not what she signed up for. I highly doubt Cheeto Face cared about her opinion at all regarding his presidency. He is not a loving and supportive husband. She is nothing but a trophy to him. Period. I feel horrible for Melania and her son. That poor boy is being shoved into the spotlight where people are being cruel and mean to him and he does not deserve it. #freeMelania #leaveBarronalone

  35. Juniper says:

    I do feel bad for her. I know she made a deal with the devil with this marriage, but I don’t think she expected this. And personally, I believe he has something on her. Either something she wouldn’t want out in public, or he’s threatened that if she walks he’ll take away access to their child. I easily imagine him doing this. Plus, her behaviour doesn’t just strike me as someone that dislikes a person – it strikes me as someone being abused by someone.
    Also – and I know this topic is a sensitive one – but I kept seeing various social media stuff at various times about their child Baron. Mostly saying how he should be off-limits – no bullying and all that. I’m not even sure what the original sentiments are that prompted such responses, I believe something like autism speculation? But if that were even remotely true, there is only one way President Fart would respond to such a thing. Remember he’s a ‘genes’ guy. He believes he is superior to others based on genes and heredity. And if there were something less than perfect in his mind about his children – he would always blame whatever wife he had them with.

    • Taxi says:

      Mel may have been a gold-digger when she married DT but I think he worked hard to present himself to her in a favorable light, pre-wedding. As in promise-whatever-it-takes then, after marriage, revert to his usual, or worse-than-ever awfulness.
      Barron has learning & developmental disabilities for which his school, Columbia Grammar, provides additional services & assistance. I believe that DT keeps Mel in line by threatening to send Barron away if she doesn’t follow his rules. She’s clearly miserable with her husband & I think fearful of losing her child.
      DT’s pattern of blaming everyone else make me think he probably blamed & emotionally & verbally abused Mel when Barron’s deficiencies became apparent. Just a guess, but I’m guessing he’s on the autism- Asperger’s scale. It’s well-documented that “old” sperm can be a contributing factor, but I’m sure Mel caught h*ll for producing a child with “problems.”
      I don’t fault her for staying in NYC, using Barron’s school as the main excuse while giving herself distance from her monster of a husband.
      DT should be forced to pay for the additional security needed in NY. He should also pay for any expenses involved in bringing the Kushners to DC.
      Remember his on-camera comment re: Ivanka? “If she weren’t my daughter I’d probably be dating her!” Besides disgusting, it’s another slap at his wife.
      The guy is a major creep & regardless of whether or not a younger Melania wanted to marry him, for whatever reasons, no woman should be treated this way. I don’t believe she had any idea how bad things would get & she will not abandon her child to his daddy’s lack of appropriate care & attention.

  36. Jess says:

    Wow, pretty obvious he said something horrible to her. I found other videos from different angles and almost everyone within earshot has the same reaction, a look of shock and horror, even the man standing near Melania does the same. I’ve always thought he was emotionally abusive, there’s plenty of evidence for that, and plenty for him being sexually abusive as well. I’m so sickened by this man and now he represents our country, unbelievable. I had to deactivate my Facebook for awhile because I couldn’t stand the idiots posting constantly, they make me sick too.

  37. Fa says:

    Also notice Ivana stop smiling when he turned around, is not just her his family as whole scare of him

  38. teacakes says:

    Yeah, no, I am not sorry for her. She chose to marry this toad and stand by him for money, even went in as a birther…… the Obamas may be gracious to her out of pity and genuine niceness but I’ll save the bulk of my sympathies for the women who are losing access to healthcare even as I type.

  39. AG says:

    Nope, not so much.

  40. OhDear says:

    If she’s abused, I feel for her and hope she gets out. No one deserves that.

    Would I be friends with her or even associate with her, though? Probably not – I don’t think she has good character.

  41. Sansa says:

    I can’t imagine being her. I saw a picture of her as a young girl and she looked so normal pretty and hopeful. Now she wears a mask.

    • S says:

      That’s all the plastic surgery and Botox. She jumped in headfirst and ridiculed the women who came out publicly against her husband, plus endorsed his birtherism. Living with Donald must be hell, but she knew EXACTLY what she was getting into, and strived HARD for that ring. She got what she wanted, and continues to get exactly what she wants (staying in New York on the taxpayer’s dime).

      • Snowflake says:

        Exactly. Her eye shape is due to bad surgery. I had a customer whose eyes looked like that. Bad eye lift imo. Idk why everyone feels sorry for her, she’s made it clear she supports whatever he does. She’s in it all the way, why would she give up her cushy life to start over? I don’t believe she’s being abused, just because she plays the submissive role. Thats what you have to do with guys like Donald. You have to kiss their ass and play manipulative games to get what you want. You have to let him think he’s the boss.

    • robyn says:

      There are pictures of her as a young woman and she is nude. Now she wears fancy clothes.

  42. Cerys says:

    I feel sorry for her up to a point. Living with Donald Trump can’t be easy but the money and lifestyle have probably compensated until now. I can’t imagine that she was even consulted about his run for the presidency and I get the impression she does not want to be first lady. She could leave him but the pre-nup may not be enough to maintain the life she has become accustomed to as a trophy wife. That said, a tell-all book could make her a fortune. Lol

  43. Isa says:

    I feel bad for her in a way. Marry for money and you’ll earn every cent. My husband and I have been very broke, now we aren’t, but through it all he looks at me the way Obama looks at Michelle.
    I remember reading how he attacked and raped one of his wives, (ivanna?) and I wonder if he does that to her.

  44. IlsaLund says:

    Now that this is circulating, how long before he orders Melanie back from New York to D.C. so they can pretend and put on a front of being such a lovely, happy family. The man appears to be an emotional abuser.

    There are reports already of how he’s been having raging temper tantrums in the White House and his staff trying to calm him down. We can only hope he gets impeached and removed from office sooner, rather than later. (And keep in mind that he has to be impeached AND removed by Congress.)

  45. Anare says:

    I have seen several clips of Trumps nasty behavior toward his wife on Inauguration Day. He is a selfish ill-mannered creep. I guess she puts up with it to get the lifestyle she wants. I don’t feel sorry for her at all.

  46. Sansa says:

    I really loved the Obama’s when Melania walked up with her Tiffany box and they both put an arm on her back in a protective way . They both must have thought she needed support and Melania did smile start to relax. Speaks miles to the emotional intelligence kindness of our former president and Michelle.

  47. anniefannie says:

    I did sense the Obama’s were somewhat concerned by Melania and were being very supportive.
    I have feeling it’s her occasional bewilderment and that the Obama’s no 1st hand what a boob her husband is… I saw a sign from the NY parade that read., Melania blink twice if you need rescuing! lol

  48. Dee says:

    Neither hate nor love no sympathy nor shame. She married him knowing his history so she should have known to expect just about anything. Sure she married him for $ — and he married her for looks. So what? That’s their business. Is she happy or unhappy? Who knows…..but again it’s their business.

    Seriously — what has she ever done that causes so dang much judgment by other women? Support her husband? Uhhhmmm…….so did Hillary so it’s hypocritical to go there. Live in NYC and pissy that she’s staying there? Well……I understand frustration over inconvenience, and I also hope she moves with the child his summer as they say, but no……it’s hyperbolic over reaction if that’s your reason to hate her IMO.

    People who actually know the woman have repeatedly talked about how kind she is to others. Kindness these days is desperately in short supply. Good for her.

    Want to judge her for posing nude ? Please. After all the foot stomping about positive body image, women owning their own sexuality, etc? More hypocrisy. Not worthy of being FLOTUS? More BS. There is no job description, the only criteria is being married to the POTUS, and therefore she’s qualified.

    • robyn says:

      No one is judging the nude photos. She posed nude and that’s a fact. Trump calls it art, some call it porn. Does porn equal art. Some say it does, others say not so much. I guess it depends on how it is done and how it is perceived. So that’s how we get alternate realities but not alternate facts. As for kindness, I don’t see much kindness when it comes to women’s issues in Trump proposals that she supports.

      • Dee says:

        Was Hillary kind to the women with issues with Bill? No she was not,

        We really don’t have a right or reason to expect a woman to go against her husband (or a husband to go against his wife…..it goes both ways). Why put that expectation on her? It’s a marriage and support of each other is an underlying tenet. We may wish it were otherwise out of self righteous indignation at him, but really? You expect one spouse to go against another ? It can happen of course, but none of us should insert our expectations into the marriage bond of others.

      • Kitten says:

        I think you make a good point, Dee.

        I understand why people see Melania as an enabler in a lot of ways, but I do agree that it’s simply unrealistic to expect that she would publicly disparage or even contradict her husband. Like most presidential marriages, they are expected to form a united front.

      • Taxi says:

        So she posed nude, long ago. So did Marilyn Monroe, Drew Barrymore, Bo Derek, Rihanna, Demi Lovato, Kim Basinger, Kelley Rowland, Miley Cyrus, Zoe Saldana, etc. Kim K. & Paris Hilton made sex tapes, often called porn.
        At Columbia Grammar, she is known to take her son to & from school daily, and behave modestly and politely to staff & other parents.

    • Neelyo says:

      Some of the New Yorkers who are ‘pissy’ about her presence are business owners who are now going broke due to Melania’s desire to stay in the city. I think they have every right to be enraged. It is more than an inconvenience, it is their livelihood.

      • Taxi says:

        And you know they are going broke how? In all of a couple of weeks?

      • Embee says:

        @Taxi-because with all of the extra security that’s been on the Trump Tower area. People have to take detours around the area so it’s difficult getting to these businesses. This will go on for as long as she stays there.

    • S says:

      Ah, yes, because, “But Hillary” is still the response to every single comment regarding Trump AND, of course, as we all know, NO ONE ever condemned, blamed or maligned Hillary for her “role” in Bill’s extramarital affairs, and she received nothing but sympathy, understanding and compassion from the American public before, during and after those experiences. 🙄

      Talking about MELANIA TRUMP neither implies or denies any feelings I may have about Hillary Clinton, because the question wasn’t, “Is Hillary Clinton Sympathetic?” which, in turn, if asked, would have zero to do with Mrs. Trump. The question was, and is: IS MELANIA TRUMP sympathetic?

      My answer? Nope. Do I wish her ill or hope she’s being abused? Of course, not! Would I like to be in her place for all the money Trump claims he has? Awww, he!l-to-the-no! Do I think she’s a monster who doesn’t love her own child? Or that she’s worse than her husband? No, and not even close.

      But, all that being said, taking Melania’s own words and actions at face value, having zero to do with Mrs. Clinton, or Bill, or whatever other red herring you want to throw in the path, my sympathy level for Melania Trump, based on Melania Trump’s own words and actions, hovers somewhere right around zero.

      My sympathy for her 10-year-old son is slightly higher, but I admit not that overwhelming either. He’s a rich, privileged young man, growing up in complete comfort and security, who will want for no material thing, unlike the many, many children his father’s policies and executive actions will endanger and potentially destroy during a Trump presidency. Plus, given his siblings’ examples, I’m not exactly expecting him to grow up and be a selfless philantrophist dedicated to making the world a better place, if you know what I mean. This doesn’t mean I think he deserves scorn; just that I feel my sympathy is better meted out elsewhere. It’s also not a partisan thing, as I don’t waste a lot of energy worrying about the Obama or Clinton children either. I wish them well, and think people who pick on them all, including Barron, are gross, but also understand that they’re ALL extremely privileged kids that are gonna be taken care of and get benefits most young people can only dream of to offset whatever social stigma comes from being in the public eye … Unlike the millions of improvised American children who fall through the cracks and into poverty, or worse, each year and have no hope of making any kind of lives for themselves thanks to institutional racism, failing public education and a sagging social safety net.

      • jwoolman says:

        The only kid in my brother’s high school class who killed herself was the daughter of wealthy parents.

        Money and gold furnishings don’t bring happiness. It’s nice not to be going hungry or cold or homeless, but most children in this country are that lucky even with parents of much more modest means and even with parents who are financially struggling. A malignant narcissist as a father is a situation I wouldn’t wish on any child. All the gold in the world won’t protect him from that.

        Barron didn’t ask for all the gold and money. It’s just there. He may not realize yet that this means he is “privileged”, but he’s just a kid and his knowledge of the world is limited. How his parents treat him looms far larger to him right now. He is lucky to have one good parent, that will hopefully get him through childhood and adolescence. You just need one good parent. Some children of wealthy or non-wealthy parents have two bad parents and that can be devastating unless some other adult in their lives protects them.

      • S says:

        Where did I say that being rich solved all your problems? Or that he was lucky to have Trump as a parent?

        I said Barron was PRIVILEGED. Because he is. So are my kids (not to the same financial degree, of course, but in contrast to many), by the way, and they’re all under 10 and all except for 2-year-old actively understand that fact, at least to some degree. Do they get all the nuances of how privilege effects their lives at their age(s)? Of course not. But they know they have more than many kids they see and know (and less than others); because I’m trying to teach them empathy and humility.

        Yes, being the son of a narcissist, which I 100% agree Trump is, is a rough go. I wish it on no one. Being in the spotlight at such a young age, through no fault of your own, also has serious downsides, no question. And money, no doubt, is not the be-all, end-all solution to happiness and well being. My point was that the children of Presidents, and other influential and well-known people, have opportunities other kids could never dream of; So much in life is who you know, and they know, arguably, the most powerful person in the world. That combo of money and power opens a lot of — pretty much, all of them — doors, so I’m not really that concerned about Barron, or Malia, or Sasha, or the Bush twins or Chelsea, etc. getting plenty of chances to do or be whatever they want in life, even if I can totally see how their lives aren’t perfect.

        The kid born to the single mother, or with drug-addicted parent(s), or parent(s) with HIV, or cancer, or whose home was lost to healthcare costs; the kid who goes to go bed hungry 3-4 times per week, or has to stay alone too young because his parent(s) can’t afford childcare, or who goes to a public school where the teachers are forced to be more jailers than educators, or any combination of the above, or the hundreds of other ways we are letting so many of our young people down so shamefully in what is the richest country in the world. THAT’S where my sympathy lies. THOSE are the kids whose futures I truly worry about.

  49. Syko says:

    I don’t know that any of us know what we’re getting into in a situation, we always think it will be different for us, or the bad stuff will never happen to us, we can handle it. I do feel sorry for her, I’ve seen clip after clip showing him being unspeakably rude to her. The walk into the White House, where he got out of the car and stomped in, leaving her to get herself out and walk in behind him. Even if you’re not into great manners and you can, by golly, open your own car door, in a formal situation there are things that are expected. During some ceremony where the wives were escorted out to their husbands, Obama took his wife’s hand and kissed it, Trump never even held Melania’s hand. There was another video where he was standing at a podium somewhere (I’m vague on all this because I didn’t watch any of it on TV) and apparently it was her turn to speak, and he turned around to her and made some rude gesture like “get on over here now”. He has no social graces, and if he’s this rude in public, I have no doubt he’s abusive at home, mentally if not physically.

    While on the subject of Cheeto Mussolini’s rudeness, did you see the one where he greeted Bob and Elizabeth Dole? Bob Dole, who arranged the call to the Taiwanese president for him, was sitting in his wheel chair, and Trump just brusquely touched his hand, and that of Elizabeth, and turned away. In contrast, here came Obama, with warm handshakes, a kiss for Elizabeth and a hug for Bob. We’re really going to miss that class and dignity.

    • SusanneToo says:

      Use and discard-that’s trump’s style. And if you’re no longer useful, you mught as well be dead.

  50. Dorotea says:

    I have Zero sympathy for this woman, to me she is a gold digger, plain and simple. She comes across as very cold and calculating, she signed up for a life of luxury in a marriage where it is pretty obvious he married her because she is georgeous and she married him because he is a Billionaire. She ended up being First Lady of the United States a position that she is not qualified to be in and a position that obviously she doesn’t want

  51. JudyK says:

    Honestly, I think Melania is the best thing he has going for him. She is poised and well spoken. I think that if it were not for the election, she would be filing for divorce. Wish we could leave Melania and Barron out of any critical discussions.

    Blast away at Trump, but, otherwise…

    • steerpike says:

      She was very well spoken when she was on the talk show insisting that Obama’s birth certificate was not real. Joy Behar kept trying to explain to her that she had seen Obama’s birth certificate, it was on display and it was completely legit and Melania kept blandly insisting that Obama’s birth certificate was no good.

      Of course, I’m sure that Trump pressured her into it, but, at some point, she is an adult and does have some responsibility for her actions.

      Edited to add: Oops…just saw that people below had already posted this!

  52. Brit says:

    She is a birther and was on hsn demanding to see Obama’s birth certificate while she was shelling out her jewelry. I’m sure trump put her up to it but it’s hard to feel 100% sorry for her.

    • robyn says:

      Yep … there’s an interview with Joy Behar where she is questioning whether Obama is an American. She doesn’t just pretend to support Trump, she supports him all the way. It’s pretty clear by that interview that she’s not just going along for the ride.

  53. GingerCrunch says:

    I have a foreign-born friend who married a military guy, so not quite a gold-digger, lol! But he can be very thoughtless and rigid and she’s really struggling with it badly these days, now that her kids are grown. They’re financially comfortable too, but they don’t enjoy any of it together. I feel bad when I see it or hear her complain. But ya know what? He was like that when they dated. And who knows what her motivations were for marrying him? I’ve even given her the name of my therapist when she told me she felt trapped. Ugh. I feel the same about Melania. Maybe they knew what they were getting into, but when it starts to cross over into abuse? It’s awful watching someone being treated like that in a marriage no matter their circumstances. So I have more sympathy than before the inauguration.

  54. jen says:

    No sympathy whatsoever. There are 2 videos on Twitter: one is she herself saying that Barack Obama’s birth certificate is not real. The other is of her at the Inauguration-Donald is turned around smiling at her and the people behind him and as soon as he faces forward again, her face in a split second goes FULL BITCH FACE b/c she thinks the cameras are no longer on her.
    He is a sociopath and she is a traitor of women.

    • jwoolman says:

      His daughter Ivanka did exactly the same thing in the same video. They both instantly shifted from smiling to not smiling, no residual smile at all as would have been pretty normal. They start smiling when he turns to them and stop instantly when he turns away. Ivanka especially does this maneuver to shift him to arm’s length when he starts touching her. I think they’re both repulsed by him but keep their eyes on the prize – any money left over when he dies and in Ivanka’s case, the opportunity for profit and power now. The stakes are much higher for Melania, because she has to protect her son until he’s old enough that Donald can’t take him away from her.

  55. Menlisa says:

    I do, it may be projection on my part but her mannerisms and his remind me of my past abusive relationship.

    For those saying she knew what kind of man she was marrying, that might not have been the case at first.
    Perhaps the way he presented himself to her at first was completely different to how he truly is and what was reported in the press in terms of how he treated his ex wives.

    Not to excuse her birther comments but Trump is a bully, at this point she probably parrots whatever he wants to keep some peace in her life.
    Again this is all projection.
    But once you are in that situation, it’s kinda flippant to ask women why don’t they just leave if they are unhappy/being abused.

    • Isabelle says:

      Exactly. Classic abusers, especially emotional abusers are highly manipulative and can paint many different faces and personalities. Many many people say Donald is this way with them, another way with this person, not the same man behind closed doors, a lot say the man on stage isn’t the real Donald. That is actually a big sign of a person that can change facades easily, classic abusers tend to do this.

  56. TheOriginalMia says:

    Not one ounce of sympathy. She joined hubby on the Obama birther train years ago. She’s bought and paid for and wouldn’t leave because of the financial and social ramifications. I think they live apart on their separate floors and only come together when it’s politically and socially necessary.

  57. Jayna says:

    On a related note, Trump, does it again. I despise him so much. After his catastrophic weekend, as far as all the bumbles, it was said by sources he was going to stick to what he was doing policywise and not veer off anymore.

    Don’t they know their boss yet? He’s an immature, narcissistic Man-Baby.

    ” President Donald Trump told Capitol Hill leaders Monday evening that he lost the popular vote because 3 million to 5 million “illegals” voted for Democrat Hillary Clinton, according to three sources in both parties familiar with the meeting.”

    • Kitten says:

      Gah. Does being a compulsive liar go hand-in-hand with NPD?
      Or is Trump just special that way?

      • Jayna says:

        Trump probably has a psychiatric disorder unique only to him, a hybrid of sorts. LOL

      • Christin says:

        Several comments on other sites suggest possibly a more serious form of NPD. —- ‘malignant NPD’, which is supposedly a combination of NPD, antisocial and paranoid traits, egosyntonic aggression, and can include absence of conscience, psychological need for power, and sense of grandiosity-importance.

        People are posting that; but I don’t know. Yet that’s what many people are saying. Maybe lots of people. 😉

      • Kitten says:

        @ Jayna-Trumpitis? Trumpinosis? Do symptoms also include an allergy to facts?

        @Christin-Ha! I see what you did there. Excellent Trump impression lol

      • jwoolman says:

        Frequent lying about things that can be easily checked is definitely a part of the narcissistic personality disorder. They just deny it when told they are lying, and tend to go into a rage when proof is presented that they are lying. That’s why Hillary Clinton and Elizabeth Warren drove him nuts. Not only were they lowly women – they kept bringing up pesky facts to counter his lies.

        Malignant narcissists tend to live in their own reality. In addition to insisting that a million or 1.5 million people were really at his inauguration, Trump is still insisting that millions of “illegals” voted to give Hillary a 3 million vote edge over him. He said this to top Members of Congress of both Parties just recently. Doesn’t matter how many people point out how impossible both statements are. It’s now part of his reality in his head.

        The White House staff is already leaking like a sieve about his frequent tantrums and he’s only been there a few days. His staff tries to calm him down. He likes to watch tv when he’s bored, which he often is, and that’s a real problem because he hears and sees things that set him off. My suggestion is to have a time delay feed to his tv and 24/7 monitoring, so they can feed something innocuous to his TV set whenever troublesome info appears. Maybe video of kittens and puppies?

    • Isabelle says:

      He just signed for the Dakota Pipeline to be enforced again after federal courts stopped it. Loathing him is an understatement.

      • Kitten says:

        We knew this was coming though–no surprises here. When many of my liberal friends were crying about Obama not doing enough to stop the DAPL, I had to continuously explain to them that an executive order to stop it will only be a temporary measure until Trump’s reign begins and it is overturned.

      • SusanneToo says:

        Hope all the Greenies who voted third party enjoy all the destruction that has been set in motion. And don’t come at me with “But Hillary…” IDGAF. A difference of about 80,000 votes in the electoral battleground states-that’s all it would have taken to avoid this tragedy.

      • Isabelle says:

        Good point kitten. Its why some decided to not leave the protest or area.

  58. Dq says:

    I actually fear for her now that this has been made incredibly public. I didn’t have any empathy prior to really observing her behaviors and facial expressions of them together. The inauguration really brought it to light. She looks miserable and like she’s stuck. I believe she is truly miserable. I do feel sorry for her a bit and I hope he gets out.

  59. Embee says:

    She might be nervous and embarrassed about how few people showed up that day because nobody likes him. Knowing that her husband had the lowest approval rating and there would be protests the next day wouldn’the be fun for her either. If she’said unhappy being married to the immature brat,she can divorce him

  60. Layla Beans says:

    Question from a Canadian: who’s the woman with a bit of a cat face standing next to Paul Ryan and in front of Mitch McConnell in the first picture?

  61. Evie says:

    Trophy wife or not, she clearly didn’t sign on to be FLOTUS and she does love her son. You know things are bad when both Michelle and Barack Obama stayed behind after greeting The Donald – who had left her in the car — on the steps of the White House to welcome Melania. BOTH of them put their hands on her back in show of friendship and escorted her up the steps. I can’t think of any other President who would ignore his wife that way especially on such a momentous public occasion.

    I also feel sorry for 10 year old Barron and any other First Son(s) and Daughters who have been ridiculed or scrutinized.

  62. EsS says:

    Initially I agreed with many of the CB posters regarding Melania reaping what she has sown. Then when I watched Joy Behar clip and thought there is no way she can avoid accountability here:
    Joy Behar: What is this with the birth certificate obsession? Did he ask to see yours when you met him?
    Melania Trump: Well I needed to put mine, anyway, because if you want to become an American citizen, you need to put the birth certificate. I have a birth certificate from Slovenia. And…do you want to see President Obama’s birth certificate or not?
    Joy Behar: I’ve seen it, I’ve seen it.
    Melania Trump: It’s not a birth certificate.
    Joy Behar: Well, it’s a certificate of live birth—
    Melania Trump: Right.
    Joy Behar: But, Melania, if he insists on what he’s saying, then no one in Hawaii can ever run for president. Because they all get the same live birth certificate.
    Melania Trump: Well, but they need to have—
    Joy Behar: Bette Midler is finished, for example.
    Melania Trump: They need to have, and, in one way, it would be very easy if President Obama just show it and—
    Joy Behar: But he does.
    Melania Trump: It’s not only, it’s not only Donald who wants to see it, it’s American people who voted for him and who didn’t vote for him. They want to see that.
    Joe Behar: It’s on display in Chicago, we’ve seen it on the internet; we’ve seen it. It is not the same as yours but it is a certificate of live birth.
    Melania Trump: We feel it’s different than birth certificate.

    Okay, queue the rocks, but based on her reticence for public speaking, I feel like she was put up to do this. The ‘It’s not only Donald’ portion speaks volumes to me. This chick would rather be discussing something lighter in nature.

    Two things changed my perception of Melania’s circumstance. The Obamas compassion and grace towards her and (imo) trump’s simmering fury while interacting with Melania throughout the campaign. The violent way trump repeatedly grabbed and handled her throughout the inauguration process (see link for elbow grab) struck a chord with me. His rage is palpable. During his most public, world stage event, we saw him attempt to display his ‘best’ behavior. I cannot imagine how vile this man is behind closed doors. He is a terrible human being.
    Yes Melania has a successful business, however, I believe Donald benefits from the profits, not Melania. Money would be a freedom he would not afford her.
    And Barron. He is another reason my heart thawed for Melania. Trump tactics are straight out of The Art of War. She stays for her child.
    Melania, just keep ordering Donny sausage gravy biscuits, Big Macs and trump taco bowls and let nature take it’s course.
    http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/donald-trump-awkwardly-hugs-melania-ivanka-expert-weighs-in-w430543

    I know many women and men suffer domestic violence without the golden cage. My heart breaks for all victims, including Melania.

    • Crox says:

      Actually, she would have a Yugoslavian birth certificate.

      • jwoolman says:

        The different areas of Yugoslavia were more separate than you might think. I had a friend from there when I was a kid, her family was going back because the situation had loosened up (this was in the late 50s or early 60s). She explained that the different areas had different languages and cultures also. So I would imagine they issued their own birth certificates in their own language and that’s why she felt it was a Slovenian birth certificate.

        As for the rest – she was just channeling The Donald. Do you really think she would dare say anything different even if she didn’t believe him?

      • Crox says:

        I was born in Ljubljana, Slovenia, when it was still in Yugoslavia. My birth certificate is Yugoslavian. It’s Slovenian in a sense that it’s different from Croatian or Serbian or others, but still Yugoslavian, because that was the actual country. However I think the word Yugoslavia is less kind to people’s ears than Slovenia, because it was a communist country. That’s probably why she emphasises Slovenia instead. Which is al-right, as she is from here. But she’d have the Yu stamp on her BC.

  63. Lena says:

    I don’t think Melania would even know if she’s being abused or not, because she lived with Cheeto for so long now, she might as well believe this is how life is/this is the role she should have as a wife. She may not realise that this kind of abuse is not normal – particularly if she came from an abusive household/culture (I’m not sure how her country is). I’m SURE he is abusive thou, that’s just his personality, I’m sure he IS awful to her. But I wonder if she realizes it.

    on another note, I think I feel KIND of bad also for Ivanka. Not really THAT bad because her life is so privileged and she will never suffer the same way as american folk that lost medical care, BUT:
    As a child is not your choice who your father is, I believe she looked for his approval her whole life. I feel she would be just fine with a regular dad, she probably loves him and feels she needs to support him no matter what. I don’t think she would be far right had she been born to a different parent, it just looks like something that wasn’t a choice in her household.

    • Bread and Circuses says:

      I’ve read that her father had a similar personality to Trump, so you may be right that this is the reality she’s always lived in.

    • Lightpurple says:

      In the past few months, Ivanka has shown me that she is an opportunist who completely lacks ethics and she plans to rip off the taxpayers for all she can get. No sympathy

    • Anitas says:

      Nooo, don’t fall for Ivanka’s spiel! It’s her game to confuse people by making them think she’s not like her old man, but she is just as smug, immortal, ambitious and self-important as him, just somewhat more intelligent. She didn’t have to disown her father if she didn’t agree with his politics, she could’ve just stayed out of his campaign and minded her own business. She’s a grown woman with a family of her own. But she’s also a narcissist, and enjoys being considered important and fawned over, meddling into state affairs with her husband, with total disregard of the consequences except solely for their own benefit. She understands but doesn’t care about conflicts of interests and what it means for anybody else, and just like her father, she thinks she’s qualified to run the country. So far up her own ass she can’t see daylight. Don’t feel sorry for her, she certainly wouldn’t feel sorry for you.

  64. alternative fact says:

    First time posting after many months of reading.

    I do feel sorry for Melania. I don’t condone pretty much anything she has done and I agree that she signed up to be a trophy wife, but I don’t think she deserves to live in misery. I can’t imagine Drumpf treats her well. For what it’s worth, it seems as if she is devoted to her son.

    Barron (sp?) is the one I feel awful for. I know the Obama girls were treated in an absolutely atrocious way, but I can’t stand seeing liberals mocking Barron either. He’s a child and he didn’t ask to be born into that shitshow of a family or put on display during the campaign.

  65. Bread and Circuses says:

    Given her husband verbally abuses, gaslights, and lies to everyone all the time, I’ve decided I’m going to consider Melania an abused spouse, at least psychologically. Yes, she signed up for this marriage, but she’s married to a malignant narcissist, and they can be very charming at first and highly toxic in the long run.

    I don’t believe she feels like she has any choice except to play the role of perfect wife at all costs (including supporting Cheetolini’s birtherism). Her safety may be on the line.

    One other interesting thing about that video; Ivanka does almost the same thing as Melania. A different expression before and after, the big photogenic smile only when he’s looking at her.

    • Isabelle says:

      Something very telling, she watched Barron like a hawk around Trump and his other children. She didn’t take his eyes off of him. If you watch closely she would try to move him more toward her and away from them. I think she not only has cold feelings toward Trump she seems to not trust Barron the other family members as well. She does show signs of emotional abuse.

  66. KiddVicious says:

    Melania looks crushed in that last video, and whatever he said to her seemed to have shocked Ivanka too. It cuts off half of her face but you can see her smile falter and she blinks quickly a few times.

    I wouldn’t put it past Trump to have her body guards spying for him, Scientology style. He seems the type that would need that much control. Maybe we should be sneaking her burner phones and Katy’s dads phone number.

    I hope Melania has good lawyers and re-negotiated the pre-nup for all of this.

  67. Indiana Joanna says:

    Melania seems repulsed by baby fists as any sane woman would be. And exhausted by his narcissism.

    In one of the earlier episodes of The Apprentice the women’s team won the reward of touring baby fists’ baroquely and tastelessly furnished penthouse. Melanie descended the guilded staircase and haughtily greeted the team. When the women gushed that she was so lucky to live with baby fists, Melanie sniped “You don’t think he is the lucky one?”

    I kinda feel bad for her. Hope she isn’t being abused. If feeling sorry for her sends baby fists into another rage filled tantrum I’m all in for #poormelania.

  68. Anitas says:

    Yeah I think she might have started as just another mindless golddigger/trophy wife material, but with Teflon Don going full on deranged I do believe she’s genuinely trapped and miserable. It is quite possible Trump controls her through their son and her shady visa situation, perhaps he’s convinced her she could be deported and separated from her son unless she was under his ‘protection’.

    She supports her husband in ruining so many people’s lives, OK, maybe now she doesn’t have a choice. But does she actually care about him being horrible to people unless it’s happening to her? I really doubt it, otherwise she never would’ve got with him in the first place. It’s hard to have sympathy for someone who I doubt would have any sympathy for me.

    • S says:

      She’s a U.S. citizen now, so nothing shady about her immigration status at this point. And even if she’d worked illegally the chance her citizenship would be revoked based on that is nill.

      Your last line though is very apt … Why waste our sympathy on someone who herself doesn’t give a hoot about anyone outside her immediate circle?

      • jwoolman says:

        I wonder if her parents are at risk? They now live in Trump Tower. I don’t know if they are permanent residents with green cards or if they became US citizens. But if they are not citizens, President Tweeter could also threaten to deport them… I imagine they are important to her and her son. Barron apparently is fluent in Slovenian. Smart mom to make sure of that.

    • steerpike says:

      Anita, your last line hits on the thing that I kind of wonder about. If Melania saw one of us in a bad situation, would she feel any sympathy for us? She doesn’t really look like the empathetic type, but who knows what she is really like.

  69. vava says:

    This was posted on Facebook by someone working in the mental health field:

    Steven Radiloff Melissa Ann ……… …………………………………………………………………PLEASE READ!!! It will answer a lot of questions and fears about what’s going on! It’s much better to know than to speculate.

    I’m posting this in the hope of generating truth, reality, and understanding of who we are talking about as an individual. It’s not about liking or disliking. It’s not an emotional response. It’s not an opinion. It’s not even about good or bad. It is a professional diagnosis of a man possessing a personality disorder. You can jump up and down, scream, get angry, be sad, be afraid. It won’t change anything. What’s most important is to be clear that Donald Trump is who he is and potentially very dangerous. Not because I said so, but in the context of what you can read here. The information comes from professional publications and resources describing different types of personalities and associated behavior and issues, along with my Graduate Degree in Counseling Psychology. I don’t expect all of you to agree, but at least read with an open mind and see if you recognize similarities. I truly want the best for America and everyone living within its borders. And as we all know, what happens here impacts the world. ………………………..PS. Trump is not an idiot. He is not inherently evil, but in this new position, he is dangerous. Again, it’s not an opinion or a vote for someone else. He has a distinct personality disorder. And, the only remedy, would be his acknowledging the problem and then seeking out professional help over an extended period of time. It is one of the most difficult personalities to interact with, as anyone who has had to deal or be in a relationship with knows very well. It’s crazy making and the more rational mind can’t easily comprehend what’s happening. Something like, “who’s the crazy one here?”. There’s almost always some degree of drama. When Trump says one thing one day and the exact opposite the next, it is not a conscious thought process. It’s an emotional reaction to how he was perceived the day before. Remember this most important factor, EVERYTHING and I mean everything is about him. And this is most evident in what some see as straight up lying. Actually, anything he says is designed to bring him more attention. So, it’s not lying in the classic sense. And, at his age, it’s very unlikely he will change, so don’t hope for or expect it. What you see is what your getting. It’s up to each individual to decide how they’re going to react and deal with it. Just rest assured, you’re not “the crazy one”, unless you play into it.
    -
    Copied from Professional Publication and Resource: “Think you can spot a sociopath/psychopath? Think again.
    According to experts, this behavior affects 3% to 5% of the population, which could mean more than 15 million people in the USA with these characteristics, or up to 1 in 20 people – higher percentages than one might realize. The people affected are millions more. Are you one of them?”

    - What is a narcissistic sociopath?
    A narcissistic sociopath is someone with a combination of narcissistic personality disorder and definitive behavioral signs of sociopathy.
    - People with narcissism are characterized by their excessive and persistent need for others’ admiration and positive reinforcement. They generally have grandiose opinions of themselves and believe they are superior to other people. Narcissists are also frequently convinced that they are above the normal responsibilities and obligations of everyday life, so they usually have significant difficulties maintaining employment or relationships as a result.
    - – The narcissistic sociopath has this type of personality along with a noticeable lack of regard for the rights of others and a tendency to regularly violate those rights.
    One noted difference between a narcissistic sociopath and people with narcissism alone is that:
    - The narcissist with the sociopathy reacts strongly and sometimes even violently to negative feedback. True sociopaths generally do not respond to criticism or care what others may think of them.
    - A narcissistic sociopath is unable to tolerate criticism and needs constant praise, as well as deference from other people. Many with this condition present themselves in the best light possible and are able to easily charm others to gain their trust.
    - These people are mentally ill and extremely dangerous! The following precautions will help to protect you from the destructive acts of which they are capable. To recognize them, keep the following guidelines in mind:

    (1) They are habitual liars. They seem incapable of either knowing or telling the truth about anything.

    (2) They are egotistical to the point of narcissism. They really believe they are set apart from the rest of humanity by some special grace.

    (3) They scapegoat; they are incapable of either having the insight or willingness to accept responsibility for anything they do. Whatever the problem, it is always someone else’s fault.

    (4) They are remorselessly vindictive when thwarted or exposed.

    (5) Genuine religious, moral, or other values play no part in their lives. They have no empathy for others and are capable of violence. Under older psychological terminology, they fall into the category of psychopath or sociopath, but unlike the typical psychopath, their behavior is masked by a superficial social facade.

    (6) Glibness and Superficial Charm

    (7) Manipulative and Cunning They never recognize the rights of others and see their self-serving behaviors as permissible. They appear to be charming, yet are covertly hostile and domineering, seeing their victim as merely an instrument to be used. They may dominate and humiliate their victims.

    (8) Grandiose Sense of Self Feels entitled to certain things as “their right.”

    (9) May state readily that their goal is to rule the world

    (!0) Pathological Lying Has no problem lying coolly and easily and it is almost impossible for them to be truthful on a consistent basis. Can create, and get caught up in, a complex belief about their own powers and abilities. Extremely convincing and even able to pass lie detector tests.

    (11 )Not concerned about wrecking others’ lives and dreams. Oblivious or indifferent to the devastation they cause. Does not accept blame themselves, but blames others, even for acts they obviously committed.

    (12) A Sociopath is always “pitting” people against each other.

    (13) Smear Campaign: A Sociopath will always be smearing someone and inciting people against each other. Sociopaths do not want people to like or get along with each other and will try to “divide and conquer.” They will say odd things to people in the social group: “She doesn’t like you” or “She doesn’t want me doing anything with you.”

    (14) Sociopath has a strange network of Support People ranging from “consultants,” to skilled-workers, to enabling co-dependents that back him up when he wants to go after his Target. Most of the Support People have their own Psychological problems.

    (15) No conscience. Lack of Remorse, Shame or Guilt.

    (16) Believe they are all-powerful all-knowing, entitled to every wish, no sense of personal boundaries, no concern for their impact on others.

    (17) The end always justifies the means and they let nothing stand in their way.

    (18) Incapable of real human attachment to another
    (19) Does not perceive that anything is wrong with them
    (20) Authoritarian
    (21) Secretive
    (22) Paranoid
    (23) Drama King: There is always conflict going on in a Sociopath’s life and it involves a “bad person,” “bad business” or “bad transaction.”
    (24) Callousness/Lack of Empathy

    If what he says is true about Trump, and I strongly suggest it is, Melania didn’t clearly know who she was dealing with when she got tangled up with Trump. So, I guess I have a little sympathy for her. Lots of voting American’s didn’t see it, either.

  70. jetlagged says:

    I’m starting to think that Melania remaining in NY is all Trump’s doing. Seeing how little regard for he has for her, I can imagine he wants her nowhere near HIS presidency. I really want to know what he said or did when he turned around. It looks like he said something to Ivanka and then said something truly awful to Melania.

    • ida says:

      I think he said something nasty about the priest who was talking about that it started to rain… he turned around that moment… and might have mumbled something like “what is this f** saying…” just guessing but that would explain why not only Melania but also Ivanka lost it.

    • steerpike says:

      Honestly, it is taking the press long enough to use the word “lie”. Some of them are taking baby steps by mentioning “falsehoods”, but they really need to step it up on calling a spade a spade.

  71. Pandy says:

    I bet he’s a total @sshole to live with …. but she signed on and is still there. I believe that she was all for becoming FLOTUS – she figured she’s sashay around in pretty gowns and wave from the front steps, not realizing that the position is also a job now. I also think she was into it until she messed up her speech. Once she became an object of ridicule and a political hindrance to Twitler, she bowed out. I bet they fight constantly. He could be the first sitting POTUS to divorce in office.

  72. Guesto says:

    I feel nothing but contempt for her.

    The only person worthy of sympathy is Barron. If anyone needs saving, it’s him. What chance does that poor kid have of a normal, fulfilled life with those two contemptibles as parents.

  73. nicole says:

    She seems cold and calculating to me, and has no warmth about her, she reminds of those women in the ‘The Stepford Wives (1975 version), she walks and acts so stiff, and I remember seeing her at the voting place in NYC with Trump, and he stopped to buy a cookie from a little girl, and he handed it to her, and she just looked at it and then passed it to the bodyguard and walked on, totally ignored the little girl and walked on with her head in the air, she gave of a vibe of a snooty socialite to me, and I dont have any admiration or respect for someone like her, she doesnt get any sympathy from me.

    • Isabelle says:

      She is eastern bloc and that is pretty normal in eastern bloc. Dated a Russian for a sometime and he looked on the outside cold as ice. His family cold as ice but once they warm up they are affectionate, deeply love family and actually passionate but they keep stone cold b*tch face and non-emotional exterior. Women and men. Probably more of a cultural difference than anything.

      • Anitas says:

        So glad you’re not making assumptions about millions of people based on one guy you dated and his family… oh wait.

      • Isabelle says:

        So you think there are no cultural differences at all between any culture? none at all?

      • jwoolman says:

        You’re quite right. We had people going back and forth to the Soviet Union for sister city purposes, and I remember one very outgoing friend say that people in the cities seemed so “unhappy” on the streets but when you met with them privately they were warm and happy and friendly. I had heard that many times before from other American visitors to the USSR, especially Moscow, except usually they did not have the opportunity to socialize with real Russians and so assumed that everybody really was terribly unhappy. I hear people making the same complaint about cold New Yorkers…. In cities even here, people often put a mask on, so to speak, to keep some privacy in crowds of strangers. Bums out people who grew up in smaller towns, they think New Yorkers are just terribly unfriendly.

        But it’s all cultural. A friend who was an informal interpreter on several sister city trips and so got out on his own a lot also remembers one social gathering he was at with Russians and somebody was amusing them all by imitating tourists from different countries. When it came to imitating Americans, he plastered this wide grin on his face and walked around with it stuck on him no matter what….. It’s actually true at least in non-urban areas here! If you aren’t smiling all the time, people assume there must be something wrong. I once was sitting in a cafeteria reading and enjoying my meal alone when some woman came up to me and started worrying about me looking “depressed”. She thought I must be lonely because I was alone, while I was enjoying the break from making social noises! Smiling in public is like the automatic “Thank you for shopping at K-Mart” said in a rapid chant…. Meaningless, just a social convention. Doesn’t mean you’re happy. Not all cultures expect people to be smiling all the time. Causes a huge amount of misunderstanding.

      • Crox says:

        She’s from former Yugoslavia, not former Soviet Union. Huge difference.

        Also, if you have to make generalizations about whole nations, Russians are miles from former Yugoslavians in their stereotypical behaviour. There are differences between stereotypes of the ex-Yu nations as well.

        And still – these are just stereotypes.

  74. Isabelle says:

    We need to start a Melania free Donald’s taxes movement. you know down deep she wants to do it.

  75. Kaye says:

    I think it’s possible to feel sympathy both for Melania AND for the people who will suffer under Trump’s presidency. It’s not a zero-sum game.

  76. Sam H x says:

    Wow, To think I had an ounce of sympathy towards her. I have no sympathy for her what so ever after reading that article and the clip Lily posted. She is no less of an enabler than the rest of the family.

    The Obamas have been very graceful, caring and respectable towards Melania on the inauguration. I have only pity left for Melania.

    The only person I have sympathy for is Barron. That boy didn’t choose his parents.

  77. Elizabeth says:

    Didn’t she get pregnant really soon after they started dating? I suspect that by the time she realized there was a problem, she was trapped.

    I mostly feel sorry for Barron, though. He didn’t ask to be born into this crazy family.

    • Crox says:

      No. They met in 1998, they were definitely dating in 1999, they married in 2005 and Barron was born in 2006.

  78. Nev says:

    Yawns and turns over. Back to sleep.

  79. Rocio says:

    For some reason, sisterhood maybe?, I like her.

  80. applepie says:

    Maybe she thinks smiling for too long gives you wrinkles? Maybe she is a calculating, cold bitch who hates his guts (don’t blame her)! I think she is possibly being manipulated and controlled. Anyway, we girls should be sticking together, not making snarky comments about women from different countries. It’s not acceptable. We don’t know her situation. ….All turning against her makes us look bad….

  81. Scout says:

    You know, blaming a woman for her husband’s BS is what got Trump elected, so maybe we could move away from that.

  82. Apples says:

    This is what I loved about Americans when I moved here – how they genuinely believe that people are nice and the “fallen” ones should be helped to find the right path. It’s beautiful but it’s also… feels naive. When you come from an Old World country you are much more realistic and call things what they are and what do we have here? A pretty woman from a poor (yes, compared to the US, or any other big Western player, Slovenia is small and poor) contry, who grabbed her only opportunity for better life. She “modeled” in Europe but moved to the US. Do you know how many beautiful women move to NY every year from around the world to seek money and success? I’m sure we all can imagine. So in that pool of beautiful women she was just one of until she met Trump. Their story is peculiar- according to her she refused to give him her number because he was with another woman but she TOOK HIS and called him a few days later. Mmmokay, that’s the way to maintain you are a good girl without loosing a good opportunity, right. And then she is going out with him for years which brings her modeling gigs. Nobody cared about her until she became celebrity’s girlfriend. She married him and has his child. Do you really think she is a victim? Of what? She chose to live her life based on the opportunities that life presented her and she is not a victim. Sure, it’s embarrassing to wait for this orange piglet with a Tiffanys box all by yourself, but she is not just another pretty model from Central Europe nobody cares about. She is rich, set for life and very glamorous. If she wanted a good guy, she would’ve moved to New Jersey and married a dentist. But that would be almost like staying in he suburbs of her native Slovenia or in other words, silly. She is not a victim.

  83. adastraperaspera says:

    Melania and Ivanka and all the women in this family are co-conspirators in this bloodless coup taking over our country.

    Do not believe they are victims. They know exactly what they are doing. They benefit while other women are being hurt.

  84. Pansy says:

    Sorry guys. Not jumping on the bandwagon. No woman deserves to live in the horror that is an abusive relationship, no matter if it started as a gold digging relationship or not.

    • steerpike says:

      Bandwagon? There has been a lot of thoughtful discussion on this thread and many people have expressed sympathy for Melania. Not sure that this discussion qualifies as a “bandwagon”, but that is certainly a good word to attempt to diminish free speech.

  85. robyn says:

    Melania experiences just a miniscule piece of the Trump effect. I felt personally assaulted by his words and actions thoughout his campaign and am offended he was rewarded for it. I can’t stand seeing a red hat anymore and tic tacs leave a bad taste in my mouth. But never mind me, the world will suffer under Donald’s tiny thumb. The DARVO concept fits Trump like a glove. It stands for “deny, attack, reverse victim and offender”. I see Trump play the victim when HE in fact is the perpetrator of lies, insults and abuse. It’s a skill he perfected and no one can hide from it or him.

    • jwoolman says:

      After the makers of Skittles came out strongly against the “one poisonous skittle in a bowl” analogy for letting Muslims into the country, pointing out the obvious difference between candy and real people – I started eating Skittles again…. They’re actually pretty good. I hope the Skittles don’t get deported.

  86. cindyp says:

    For some reason I kind of like her. The warmest & most genuine that I’ve seen her look is with Michelle Obama. Must be awful to have to be part of that trashy family.

    • jwoolman says:

      At the time of the infamous plagiarized speech incident, I think she was truthful when she said she greatly admired Michelle Obama (probably caught hell for saying that at home). My bet is that she longs for the kind of respectful and loving relationship the Obamas have. They really were protective of her as Donald stomped away from her, and she responded strongly to that. She’s not really an ice queen.

  87. Dolphin7 says:

    I feel very sorry for her. I read Barron’s school is off until Weds. And still she turned around and went back to New York. The clips are so telling, and remember Ivana talking about him raping her while they were going through the divorce? Then Trump paid her to stop talking about it. I totally think she is being abused on some level or possibly all levels. And now that’s why she is so anxious to stay in New York. I can’t imagine how she feels after the example of how warm and loving the Obamas were to one another. I am so disgusted that’s he’s in office and the comments I’m seeing on fb by his supporters. And people said Obama was dividing us? I feel like we are on the edge of civil war between progressives/regular people and the alt-right. I also read he flew into a rage after reading he didn’t have as big a crowd as he’d hoped and his staff has to try and hide News pieces from him. I’m glad for Melania and Barron that they can stay in New York away from him on a personal level. But as a taxpayer I’m annoyed we have to pay millions for the extra Secret Service. Also, is anyone else suspicious of Trump and KellyAnne what the real relationship is?

    • Matador says:

      Where are all the people screaming about the every move of the Obamas as a “waste of money” given the millions it is going to cost to protect Malaria in Manhattan? Oh right. It’s okay when rich white Republicans waste taxpayer money.

      No sympathy for her whatsoever.

  88. DonnieDingusMustGo says:

    No. She is an enabler. Lie down with pigs, get dirty. The entire family is the enemy.

  89. Matador says:

    Nope.

  90. miasys says:

    Personally, I do not like her. That said, I don’t think she deserves to be hurt by him, if that is what’s going on. I can dislike someone and still not condone abuse.

    • Dolphin7 says:

      I loathe this man with every fiber of my being, and I did not really care for Melania. But in light of recent events and videos, I definitely think he’s horrible to her and I do feel sorry for her. People with personality disorders can mask those behaviors initially and not reveal their true self until their victim is trapped. I wonder if he pushed her into making the comments about the whole birther thing. I wouldn’t put anything past him. Her body language is so telling. Yes it’s amazing how conservatives are just fine with paying for the extra security cost for Melania/Baron and had a fit any time the Obamas went on a vacation, etc.

      • Crox says:

        I think he did push her, not because she’d believe something else and was bullied, but because she seems so apolitical. I doubt she cared either way about Obama’s birth but had to say certain things as the wife of Donald Trump. He does not seem the type to let her speak out something against him or say she doesn’t care about something he’s going on and on about.

  91. virginfangirl2 says:

    If you’re interested in helping democrats win elections in swing states, here is a link:
    https://swingleft.org/

  92. SusanneToo says:

    Posted this on the wrong thread earlier. Too dizzy with rage, I suppose. It deserves to be seen. Doubt it will bother the trumpkins, though.

    SusanneToo says:
    January 24, 2017 at 6:37 pm
    Just one example of the coming censorship. They’ve also hit the EPA.
    http://www.buzzfeed.com/legacy_mobile/dinograndoni/trump-usda?utm_term=.aceN1pJ36#.lj1Zp6ERv

    Oh, and just in, he’s keeping his BFF Comey at FBI.

    • Tate says:

      I saw this. Same goes for the EPA. I contacted my Senators about it. I don’t think there is a damn thing they can do but I am going to make noise wherever I can and hope someone pays attention.

  93. Achoo! says:

    I don’t know what to make of her really. I get the impression she is quite shy and would rather not be first lady. She has a resting ‘bitch face’ which is unfortunate because her whole face and personality seem changed when she smiles. Something I have noticed since we have been getting all the before and after photos of her is that it’s undeniable that her facial alterations have had the effect of making her look more and more like Ivanka.

  94. Marcy says:

    There’s a video going around Instagram of Donald Dump during his debate part of the campaign with Melania he’s talking stern to her and twisting her finger harshly and her asking him to stop. She may have married him for money etc but if he’s abusing her that is still not right. That video disturbed me deeply and I felt bad for her. What he’s doing to us all even is abusive to our constitution.

  95. what's inside says:

    I do not feel sorry for her. You make your bed, you lay in it. However, can anyone imagine if she divorced him while he was in the presidency? Holy Cow!

  96. Dinah says:

    I don’t have any pity for her. She always wanted the whole world to see her in the nude. Wow, what an aspiration and inspiration. Congratulations to her on this huge achievement, I guess.

  97. Ellis says:

    All abusive men start out fantastically, disarmingly charming. All of them. In every economic class. But to have one fantastically wealthy pretending he cares about you and promising you the world? Mesmerizing. Then you marry them, and little by little the control slips in, In every economic class. Then you have a child and start to see how the crazy is effecting them, and it becomes untenable. And in this case, crazy says he’s going to run for president. And you’re thinking, “Yeah right, I’ll go along, say what I have to, he’ll lose, and I’m out of here.” I don’t see why that’s so hard to believe, we all thought he would lose. I watched that video, she was not “insistent”, she was rote. Every abused woman I know has been forced to say things to family and friends they did not mean, were forced to, brainwashed into, scared not to. (I actually had one friend married to a $$$$ NY lawyer that made her lie about her education – what!?- for his own status reasons, in between beatings.) Now put that on a world stage. How about Ray Rice’s gf saying he was a nice guy in an interview after he beat her? Think she meant it? There are too many examples. I know a lot of abused women, in all economic classes, that found themselves living lives they never wanted, with husbands making getting out a truly frightening hurdle. And you can’t look at his past two marriages and say he would act the same with Melania. He might be crazier (is that a real question?), he might hate her more, or be more possessive, none of us know her Achilles’ heel. But he does.

    She knew while they were dating? You mean like Amber Heard who set up her camera to record her drunk-at-breakfast, abusive husband one whole month after they wed? Think she didn’t know before the wedding? Not all do, and we don’t know Melania did. That does not exonerate the men of their abuse. Plus, you have a whole lot of abused women who actually thought the men would change after marriage, they could change them, the men would see how much they were loved and just flipping change. No. Just no.

    “she could do some real, substantive work with the platform of FLOTUS. She won’t though. Pretty soon she’ll be claiming all of Michelle Obama’s work as her own. ” Wow. That leap in logic does not even deserve response.

    Ivanka is the one whole-heartedly supporting Trump. She actually does have influence, Melania does not, so let’s ask her why, when daddy causes us to lose more rights, when he treats his wife like shit, when he treats women like locker-room jokes. Women are chattel to him, but you would think that if a man watched a baby girl he loved grow into a woman, it would curtail his misogyny. Guess not.

    Anyone see the video of him getting out of the limo and sprinting up the stairs without Melania, who was not even an afterthought, next to the video of Obama waiting next to it until Michelle came around, joining arms, and walking up together? I don’t care what country he was born in, that’s class. And I don’t give a rat’s ass about “Slovenia”. Even if they’re #1 in the world on everything, a country is not her back-story. And no amount of research can find that, only she knows what she’s gone through to make her think this is all she is worth.

    And if the only thing my controlling husband allowed me to do, because he had reduced me to trophy wife, was to spend his money to look good? As much as I could get my grubby fingers on until he lost finally lost the election and I could run myself. Oh shit. And if I had that figure? I’d pose naked all the time, just because I could.

    I will always have sympathy for women who are treated like this in public, and look so sad, because the truth is, if this is what is in front of us, what is hidden is a lot worse. In every economic class.

  98. emma says:

    Y’all, she’s a gold-digger who got more than she bargained for. She just wanted to live a life of luxury on Park Ave. Too bad for her, but she’ll be fine. There’s probably just no love between her and DJT… he may have been looking at Ivanka in that video anyways!

  99. Jayna says:

    I don’t get all this Melania is being abused, blah, blah. I don’t believe that at all. I believe he’s a selfish man and not aware of her feelings in this big fishbowl of this new political life. I think she has the life she wants and has lasted a long time with Donald and wasn’t some unhappy wife. They seem, in this interview, to understand each other and she adapted to his life. It works for her, maybe not for other people.

    She’s just overwhelmed right now by a new political life she didn’t really want and all of a sudden the First Lady at her husband’s inauguration.

    This interview with Larry King was after they were married. they had been together for five years when they got married. Is it just me, or did she seem to speak English better back then than she has in recent interviews? Maybe it’s just nerves now because he was the Republican nominee and her interviews were more measured.

    It’s weird to see Trump back when he seemed more likeable, arrogant, but still a little softer.

    Melania is very beautiful

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4XfyYFa9yo

  100. Deeanna says:

    Note to Kaiser: I really, really appreciate you having a “political” article or two available for posting. With the bullshyte that is going on already and with what is surely to come. it is best for people to be informed. And Celebitchy is as good a place as any for this to occur.

    Matter of fact, I prefer to read here than lots of other places.

    So thank you so much, Kaiser!

  101. leyla says:

    I am almost sure the Orange pervert said “whore” and turned around like a smug SOB…you can see he enjoyed humiliating her in front of the whole world…

  102. Crox says:

    I too gained some simpathy for her when I saw this video. I see two possible explanations:
    1. He said something really horrible.
    2. She has been taught through years to just look at him and smile when he’s talking. So this is her fake “Donald wants me to look happy” smile. Perhaps she was even instructed to play the happy wife.

    Either way, it’s creepy.

  103. robyn says:

    I think someone pointed out earlier. We can’t really see in the video who Trump’s looking at when he turns around. The entire family is grinning at him like hyenas that just killed their prey.

  104. Marianne says:

    Part of me doesn’t feel sorry for her because she’s a grown ass woman who knew what she was getting into when she signed her contract. But part of me feels a little sorry cause I imagine what hes like in private. I think the only reason why Melania continues to stay is Barron. It will be interesting to see what happens when Barron turns 18. (Unless Donald dumps Melania first).

  105. Cinderella says:

    I feel she is totally controlled by him. Everything she does is controlled. She’s in it so deep, and now she has a child to consider. Look how vindicative Trump is in general. Can you imagine what he’d do if she tried to leave? He’d bury her. I had a feeling she wouldn’t move to DC. It looks like she can barely stomach him. I would never fault a woman for marrying a rich man, but this often is the trade off. I bet Melania wishes she were Ivana right about now….off in the Mediterranean somewhere with millions and some stud.

  106. anon1 says:

    I think people are projecting the fact that you’d rather he’s an offender and abuses her. IF you look at their past interviews, she’s open, he does not interrupt her and it truly seems to be a modern marriage, where both of them have their own lives but love each other and decided to marry. Why would you feel sympathy for a woman that’s married to the most powerful man in the world and one of the richest. Seems to be that most of her dreams have come true beyond her wildest imagination.

  107. Ninabina says:

    Some of the comments here about the rest of the world lagging behind USA by centuries really reminded me why i felt such sadistic glee upon learning Trump is your new president. I dont care if such words came from a person with PHD, you are still a pompous, condescending, arrogant toerag. People like me been ridiculed just because we came from places where those outdated WW2 terms didnt classify as being first world. People like me (or my husband, in this case) has also been told that our opinion doesnt matter because we are ‘mainlanders’, therefore if USA told us other people wearing Day of the Death’s makeup is offensive, the only acceptable reaction as a native is to be offended. If we dont, well, it’s because we are dumb foreigners. Like that Melania, as per the poster’s argument. So easy to dismiss us as individuals with valid opinions just because the place we came from is supposed to be behind by centuries, eh.

    Take a look around. Your president is Trump. The least you could have learnt by now is some humility. Dont be dismissing and patronizing us just because you truly believe your country is the police and legislator of everything virtuous.