When People Magazine runs a story you know it’s publicist sanctioned. I used to think that was the case for US Weekly too, but now I’m not so sure. After almost two years of will-they-or-won’t-they, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner have called off their divorce, according to People. This news comes about three weeks after US Magazine ran a story they claim was confirmed with a source that Garner was just about to file. Maybe that was a warning shot to Affleck who straightened up just enough to avoid a divorce, but whatever the case it’s not happening at this point. Rinse and repeat, right? The People article does confirm that things have been pretty rough for them lately, so if they divorce is “called off” it means Garner was close to filing I guess.
Though the actors, both 44 — who announced their separation back in June 2015 — aren’t back together, they have decided to keep working on their marriage after going through a recent rough patch that nearly led to a permanent split.
“Jen has called off the divorce,” a source close to Garner tells PEOPLE in the latest issue. “She really wants to work things out with Ben. They are giving things another try.”
But a source close to the couple says it was a decision they both made: “There is always a chance of reconciliation. They love each other. They also really, really love their kids, and those kids love their parents.”
The day after Affleck reunited with buddy Matt Damon on the Oscars stage, the former couple hosted a small gathering at their Los Angeles home to celebrate their son Samuel’s 5th birthday, along with daughters Violet, 11, and Seraphina, 8. “The girls had wrapped presents for Sam, including superhero toys. They had a cake. Everyone seemed happy,” says a source.
Lest you think these two are giving it another try, both E! and ET are claiming that nothing has changed between them and that they’re still coparenting as usual. In fact E! contradicts People’s report. A source tells E! “Their relationship is very fluid and nothing has really changed. They have been working at their relationship for the past few years. They are not back together. They are co-parenting. The most important thing in all of this are their kids.” A source told ET essentially the same thing, and put the kibosh on People’s hint that a reconciliation is possible:
“There is no update or change in Ben and Jen’s relationship…
“Everything is moving at same pace it has been since their separation was announced. They have always remained civil and they are doing this at the pace they need to do for the best interest of their family. No specific event occurred or changed their relationship. It’s the exact same status.”
So is People’s source Ben’s side while ET and E!’s are running Jen’s side? I get the impression that he wants to win her back and that she’s tolerating it but isn’t fully on board. I wish she would cut him off but loves him too and is trying to do what she thinks is best for the kids.
Lainey ran a blind item recently which many of you believe was about Affleck. I put a lot of stock in her BIs, unlike other sites, because she seems to have legitimate insider information. She wrote about an actor scaling back his commitments who is undergoing treatment for substance abuse (she didn’t write that exactly but it’s implied) after his wife issued him an ultimatum. We’ve heard that Affleck no longer wants to play Batman and the blind claims that the studio hasn’t commented because they’re respecting his space. Long term sobriety would help him so much but I’m just speaking from personal experience.
Header image is from February. Images of Garner in the striped shirt are from this weekend, 3-5-17. Credit: FameFlynet
Until next week. Their story is getting redundant. He loves me, he loves me not.
Exactly…
People are tired of their back and forth
My eyes glaze over with these two.
Why do these 2 keep running to the press? Split up, stay together, whatever…
I dont believe they are. I think people put too much stock in the tabloid “sources”. A lot of that is just fleshed out by editors from her hairdresser or his stylist conjecture. We saw the same round of bs with Brad and Angelina, and Beyonce and Jay Z. They are pushing sales and taking info off of anybody with a remote connection and running it without confirmation. Thats why we have had so many contradicting stories on these two from Day ONE. If you recall, even in the beginning People, US and E were running contradictory stories. CB proposed that the different PR camps were feuding but thats now been disproven given that the principles are still sharing a home, holidays and visiting each other on set. Neither is desperate to leave and its highly unlikely that their PR employees are fighting in the media two years down the line while their bosses hang out together in tracksuit pants.
Occams Razor ; tabloids are being tabloids and got tired of waiting for official juice so now they are either making stuff up or using unreliable sources.
Girl doesn’t love herself.
Yup I just want to tell her girl you’ve got other options.
That much is made perfectly clear by her choice of socks. SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE F*CK IS SHE WEARING?
I bet Sam has a matching pair.
The outfit is not my favorite, but I love the socks! there, I said it, I love silly socks!
I like the socks. It looks like she is coming from a school function & she looks totally appropriate to me.
Oh, I love the socks!
I love silly socks too and just bought a pair with dogs on them because I knew my daughter would love them! I’m usually one to criticize Garner’s atrocious fashion sense but I can’t pick on the fun socks. Meanwhile, I also believe Lainey’s BI was about Bennifer and I think the US Weekly divorce story was her ultimatum – straighten up right now or it’s done. And while I’m not a big Garner fan (any more – I loved her on Alias and miss that show so much!), I am sympathetic to being unable to separate yourself from a bad relationship because you believe that, this time, things will be different. It’s easy to see from the outside that things never change for good, but I’ve been in those situations before and know how easy it is to be convinced (by tears and sincere pleading) that this time he gets it and it really will be different.
You don’t know that. Maybe she loves her kids more than herself and wants them to have an intact family? That whole line about “If the parents are happy the kids will be too” is one huge load of bs. Kids want both parents and if it can be done, more the better. It’s not about what she wants now, her children come first and it’s wonderful to see that because it’s so rare nowadays. She had to know what she was marrying and she chose to have kids with him so, there you go. They look like happy and healthy children and while Ben sucks, he’s their father and presumably not abusive so he’s infinitely preferable to some random man that could do God knows what to them. Step parents are usually a bad idea and even worse to drag a bunch of randoms through your house and bed when vulnerable kids are around. Too many horror stories and I’m betting she is well aware of it. Good for her.
Staying together for the kids is also a load of bs. Kids are not stupid and they’re going to become aware of what their father is. There are many unhappy intact families out there.
More than ‘keeping the family together’ I think her strategy is to keep looking like the good-saint wife who took him back even though all he did.
He’s a schmuck and her passive-aggressive behavior is annoying. This isn’t love. It’s addiction, image, and control.
^ THIS ! 100% agree. I would just add “safe” or “familiar” to your list.
Sigh….well I’ll bookmark this page and meet everyone back here for the next time he cheats on her. He is 44 years old, he is who he is. This married but not together thing? She has her reasons I guess and Hollywood-wise she’ll be nothing much without him, but I though she might have more self-respect. Clearly not.
Better a horrible ending than horrors without end…
I think this whole “distraction ” is to cover his current rehab stay. Best of luck to him and hope he is able to get help so he can be a great dad to his kids. (His own father was not present)
Hope he gets help too and they can get to a good place and make it work.. I hate when ppl stay together for the kids. Being in an unhealthy relationship isn’t the right thing for your kids.
That’s my gut feeling as well. That this IS covering a rehab stay or some sort of program that jen wanted him to do
He can’t be successful in rehab until he admits to himself and his family that *he is an addict*. Not troubled, not battling “demons”, an ADDICT. For her sake Jen also has to admit this fact to herself as well as admit she is an enabler. That they are in a co-dependent relationship. Period.
This has nothing to do with “staying together for the sake of the kids”. Ask adult children of addicts the joys of living in a co-dependency household.
Great for him, bad for her.
Honestly I bet he’d be much better off in the long run with out her constantly swooping in and cleaning up his messes. She’s just as much an addict as he is but she’s addicted to his crazy. It’s a classic codependent relationship.
She needs al-anon in the worst way.
I agree. Is the problem alcohol or harder drugs though? Ive seen both alluded to.
He has a known problem with alcohol and Lainey has hinted at problems with pain medication and heroin.
I’m confused. There was another “rough patch” recently? Wasn’t the “rough patch” in 2014/2015 when Ben was seen on video in Canada without his wedding ring and then when he was caught having inappropriate relations with the nanny? So, i guess that divorce announcement was just a threat that she never intended to follow through on. And here we are again two years later as she tolerates yet another “rough patch” and threatens divorce yet again, and surprise surprise, she’s called it off yet again. I get the whole “for the kids” thing, but there’s a point where enough is enough. Codependent. I totally predicted this in 2015 though, so I’m not shocked. She just can’t and won’t leave him.
What’s amusing is that any mention of a rough patch or blowout fight has been ‘denied’. Other places will frantically wave their arms around and yell that nothing has changed, etc. I think that rough patch was the horrible holiday vacation after which Ben was barely seen with the family, had a detox nurse, then was seen drinking at the Golden Globes. But you’re right ultimately. I mean, she didn’t even throw his ass out after he had an affair with the childrens’ nanny. We should have seen it then. She will literally put up with anything. Such a doormat, that one. He has her on a string and constantly plays her for a fool.
He wasn’t seen drinking at the GGs.
She did temporarily throw him out after the nanny, both in Atlanta and in LA. He briefly rented the house next door to the family home in LA until she let him come back.
He was drinking at the globes and there is a pic to prove it. No place serves soda in an old-fashioned tumbler like that. You need to accept his massive problem with booze and move on.
I have always said he’s an alcoholic and he was photographed drinking alcohol as recently as late 2016.
However, it’s pure speculation that he was drinking after the Golden Globes. He was willingly photographed with Casey holding a similar drink at the Live By Night afterparty (the day after the Globes). The fact that both events were held in the very week he was photographed with a detox nurse makes me at least sceptical as to whether he was drinking. Either way, he’s obviously not drinking right now.
@A Well he still had the tell-tale alcohol bloat at the Oscars. His face was so puffy and he seemed very agitated like he was on something. That was just 10 days ago. He wouldn’t be in rehab right now if he were actually sober this year. Clearly he’s not able to maintain sobriety if he has checked himself in somewhere. That’s just logic. So while it might be speculation that he was drinking at after parties, he probably was, all things considered.
@Christine He didn’t go to any Oscar after parties. Or were you talking about other awards shows?
@christine it’s possible that anti depressants or other medication he is getting in rehab can account for those symptoms.
He flew in from SLC the morning of the oscars – and he seems to have been in rehab probably since shortly after the Super Bowl.
@KB He went somewhere and partied. His agent’s wife posted a pic of herself, Ben, Casey and Ben’s agent after the Oscars. They posed in front of a wine rack. Jeff Bezos was hashtagged so I assume it was the Amazon after party. @Jenfan You think he’s been in rehab since 2/5? I don’t think it’s been that long. He was spotted here and there.
Ben did not attend any Oscar after parties. Straight after the ceremony, he went for a meal at Osteria Mozza with Casey and his friends and family. That’s where the picture with Patrick Whitesell and the wine rack was taken. Whitesell’s wife even mentioned on Instagram that they were having a meal.
Ben was last seen in LA on Thursday, February 9. Someone here mentioned that he had signed up via a public website to do a charity run with the family on Sunday, February 12 but was a no show. Jennifer, the kids and Ben’s mother all attended.
@A you run the allaaffleck tumblr don’t you?
@Priscilla Yes!
Looks like they are tentatively back together, provided that he sticks with sobriety. People’s print article says they were affectionate at Sam’s recent birthday. That’s the first time affection has been reported in a semi- public setting.
Ben’s father got and remained sober at a similar age to Ben.
Ben is getting impatient treatment and Jennifer flew in on Monday. She is staying nearby and visiting him daily to do family support work.
“Impatient treatment ” has to be one of the best typos ever!
Or maybe it’s a new treatment for addiction, as opposed to in patient treatment. LOL
I don’t know if “they are together “. Though I do think she agreed to stick around if he got really serious about getting help for his addictions. Getting treatment at a rehab facility is getting serious about it. Do you have inside info about Jen staying nearby and doing family support work? Any sightings of her in salt lake? She was photographed Monday morning on the school run. (Though not Tuesday or yesterday)
FWIW, Gossip Cop actually got a denial on the People “reconciliation” story, which is really odd since GC rarely refutes stories in the “top tier” entertainment outlets. They also got a denial on a story that Matt D, got them “back together.” (Why even bother denying the last one – it’s harmless.) Gossip Cop takes the People article to task and says they’re not divorcing yet but there’s also no reconciliation. They say it’s all just more of the same constantly fluctuating stories about them and they’re still just respectfully coparenting.
I actually do think US mag has credible sources because People’s story pretty much confirmed the US story on 2/17 that said she was preparing to file. US followed up People’s story yesterday saying the divorce is still on the table but Jen is waiing for the right time.
So, their camps are still giving out conflicting stories. I don’t understand why they gave People that story, which basically says they’re not divorcing YET, but they’re also not back together. Why publicly send that message of ambiguity out into the world for your kids to see? It’s only bringing more media scrutiny on them and their kids as everyone will now watch and analyze their every move.
Most likely people mag had the rehab info and went to their PR folks. And they gave them this story instead, to keep the Rehab out of major press. People’s story does not really say anything definitive except that their not filing now and they are working on it. Which is basically what E news said 2 weeks ago and what they continue to say. US mag covers both sides. ET is saying nothing has changed. Now as for gossip cop – I do find that interesting – though the only thing they deny is that the divorce is cancelled- when in fact People said its off for now – I think this denial was because of the massive pick up basically saying their back together.
I watched the insider and access Hollywood videos where they interview the People Mag editor – would she outright makeup stuff knowing she is going to be on national TV?
“they interview the People Mag editor – would she outright makeup stuff knowing she is going to be on national TV?” Sure, why not? All of these tabloids have editors and all of them would swear up and down that what they print is the truth as far as they know it.
They’ve been doing the conflicting stories thing for almost two years now. I think it’s a calculated strategy to keep tabloids and people focused on whether or not they’re together, rather than his addiction issues. If he’s in rehab, as Lainey’s BI suggests, this is just another way to deflect from the real story.
The People article specifically states (twice) that they are NOT back together. It says nothing about being “affectionate” at Sam’s bday, just that everyone “seemed happy.” Where did you get this info that she’s staying nearby and doing family support?
The print version and People’s video story both say they were affectionate at the party.
@A “affection”. People went with this last May when they were in Paris, saying they were affectionate when they were in a restaurant until their children joined them. Fluff to make us read and imagine.
Again, what is your source that Jen “flew in Monday” and is staying nearby doing family support therapy? Is just that she has not been papped since Monday morning?
LOL puh-lease. Fluff to build up their already mostly-fake story.
@A Where did you get this info that she’s with him in rehab? Multiple people have asked you.
That poster has provided no receipts for that claim I’m guessing because he/she/it doesn’t have them.
This back & forth is getting a little ridiculous, and hopefully it isn’t causing a lot of confusion and instability for their children. BUT…those of us on the outside really have no clue about the inner workings of their relationship/family (other than the same bits of info they release), so as long as everyone is happy & healthy that’s all that matters. You can’t really fault someone for fighting for their family.
Since their split, Ben didn’t run off with a young starlet. There’s been zero gossip about him. He and Jen seemed to be working on co-parenting all this time. He was in therapy. He focused on his children.
I don’t get the hate. If he is working on his drinking, good for him. Even if they are or aren’t getting back together, they do seem to care about each other. The children seem happy and close to their parents.
No, he just screwed his children’s nanny on the post-split vacation. A starlet would have been vastly less damaging to his children.
He still had major booze bloat at the Oscars, so I doubt he’s actually working on his sobriety. Also notable that he chose to seek help after his movie bombed, and not when his marriage was imploding or when they broke up. Seems more like something he’s doing to regain WB’s trust.
Anyway, Affleck get’s a lifetime red card from me for the disgusting way he drunkenly pawed at that reporter who was just trying to do her job, and his gross comments to the female producer on Project Greenlight. He’s a creep like his little brother.
These are my thoughts, too. He waited almost two years to go to rehab, if that’s in fact where he is. And it was only after she threatened to file? I think Warner Bros could be behind it also. I think he was fired from directing.
“Ben didn’t run off with a young starlet.”
Why would he run off with one when he can just screw them on the side as he has done all along while she props up his public image? Unless people actually believe he only screwed the nanny and the all those other stories were just “rumors”. Yeah…sure. 😒
Do you genuinely believe that in the two years that Ben has become an even bigger pap magnet that he is managing to bang 20 year olds on the sly? If he is, wouldnt it be much smarter to get that divorce (which nobody cares about anyway) and live his life? Its 2017 not 1937. Nobody would care about him dating girls as long as he was divorced and making a show of co-parenting. It would actually help him seem cooler to the guys who make up the bulk of his audience to start up with some VS model. Older women who follow this gossip will moan but they dont run the box office so who cares. They cant even damage a wife beaters box office, why would anyone fear that they could damage a divorced mans whose crime is dating young model/actresses? My point is, theres very little PR upside to him staying in this marriage, if he is still in there, its for other reasons.
@Bree do I think he can manage to be on the sly. Ha! Oh yeah. We never saw pictures of the woman he was with at that hotel in Nova Scotia…but I know enough people in Nova Scotia to tell you, they were there. Oh and the crew of To the Wonder would like to have a word. Ahem. 😒
Anyway I agree he wants to stay in the marriage and yes he loves his kids; but I see no indication he wants the work of it or commitment. As people have said, it’s great if he’s gone to rehab but that was after a professional set back, not the family one. Now if she’s enough of a doormat to be fine with that? Well, I hope they manage reasonable happiness I guess.
Lainey’s blind sayd he went to rehab because Jennifer said he needed to get sober or the marriage was over, not that he went to rehab because a film flopped.
@A More conjecture from you. Lainey’s blind did not say that. She said that the “catalyst seems to be” Jen. She’s hedging because she doesn’t actually know.
Yes, people predicted he would become Leo 2.0 but he has remained committed to being a parent and has kept his head down outside of work and contracted appearances.
Yes, he seems to have struggled with depression and alcoholism but is clearly taking steps to address that now and if his wife is willing to support him through it, good for them.
Totally agree with A. How do you know Jennifer flew in on Monday?
She doesn’t.
Lots of rose tinted glasses here. He’s shown up to several events and interviews disheveled and slurring so he’s obviously on something. And while he hasn’t been papped with starlets there’s been more than one gossip item about him spotted out on dates. He’s clearly struggling with an addiction and I’ll give him credit for seeking help but just because he’s mostly covered his tracks doesn’t mean he’s been some sort of paragon.
@Luca76 There was a comment on another board that I visit about Casey Affleck. Apparently he was seeing another woman last year. They would meet in hotel rooms only and no one ever found out about it. We all know that Ben has his little bungalow at a local hotel, I’m sure he’s had sex with various women in the past two years. He can sneak around, it’s naive to think otherwise.
No one is denying he has addiction issues or that he has been openly struggling for the past few years. But no, I don’t believe he’s been secretly bedding VS models. He went through the hard part of publicly announcing a divorce and telling their kids. It had no effect on his perceived bankability as a star. There are now no career reasons to stay married, unless he actually does regret messing it up and want to remain married because he loves her.
Casey Affleck and his wife separated over a year before they publicly announced – a perk of being less famous is that no one noticed or cared.
“It had no effect on his perceived bankability as a star. There are now no career reasons to stay married” LMAO! Hilarious. Still waiting for those receipts that Jen is staying next door to Ben’s rehab.
I’m not sure why that’s hilarious. The New York Times published an article on the potential effects of the scandal career-wise and concluded there weren’t really any. This was later borne out by the success of The Accountant, not that I believe any movie star can ‘carry’ a film in the traditional sense anymore. Ben’s still a big star, regardless of his marital status.
Won’t be providing any receipts until he has left. Believe me or not, I don’t mind. She won’t show up in LA until Friday evening or the weekend.
@A you are my new insider 😀
I don’t know how you can possibly know this with certainty unless you really do know someone connected to Jen. But I can’t wait to see the receipts😀.
Btw – I think it makes sense that she is there – she has not been photographed since Monday. And with a day like yesterday – if she was in la there would have been tons of photos.
If you have this alleged connection to Jen or the situation why are you using Lainey as an irrefutable source in regards to Ben’s alleged addictions? Shouldn’t you know this yourself
@A … I think like you 😉
Yes come on back @A some of us do like a bit of gossip here 🙂 Jen hasn’t been papped since Monday.
Whether she’s with him or not it’s good that he’s seeking help, a very good move for himself. And he does have to do it for himself above all else, otherwise it won’t stick. Only then will he be able to support others around him.
@ I don’t have a connection to either Jennifer or Ben and have never claimed to.
@A Garner has been papped on Thursday in Brentwood….so that means all your insider info is not so reliable?
It’s more difficult to be compassionate than judgmental. Addiction is a lifelong battle. I applaud him for getting help. I’ll save my judgment for myself.
Second that.
I hope she doesn’t stay with him for the kids. I stayed for a lot of years until it hit me one day – I’d be devastated if my kids ended up in the kind of relationship I had with their dad because that’s what I modelled for them.
Respect for not giving up on a marriage but this just reeks of unhealthiness.
Agreed. Although I believe she loves him and wants to support him in rehab, I believe she would have left were it not for the kids. And vice versa. Really a mistake to stay together for the kids, glad you figured that out CommentingBunny!
None of this is for the kids. Every single thing they’ve done has been exactly what you’re advised not to do. Drawing it out for even a much shorter period is just awful for children, who handle long-term ambiguity far worse than a properly done divorce.
Annoying as they may be, GOOP and Mr. Coldplay are an example of how to do it right. They co-parent and remain a close family unit for the kids, but they also drew a very clear line in the sand post-separation, and they moved on with their lives.
Agreed having grown up in this type of situation it’s awful for the kids and has long lasting affects into adulthood. Thank god for therapy!
Oh, these two.
Prediction: in a couple of years he’ll have another public fuckup ala nanny-gate and then she’ll have to divorce him for realsies.
I agree. Can we place bets on how many years? I give it five, or until he meets someone he actually loves.
+2
I would not be surprised if Ben and Jennifer leave LA and move somewhere like Iowa to raise their family away from the celebrity fishbowl. Much like what Demi Moore and Bruce Willis did with their children.
I would be shocked. If they haven’t done that yet, and they’ve been “complaining” about the paps all this time, they aren’t going anywhere. She really doesn’t mind the paparazzi. She’s always so happy to see them on her strolls.
If they were really putting the kids first they would get over themselves, admit their shit isn’t working, divorce, and set up two stable, calm households in which to coparent. The kids know what’s up, they are getting bigger. This kind of uncertainty is horrible for kids.
My husband grew up with this crap. It was constant separation, threats of divorce, reconciliation, unclear standing etc with his parents. He has said many times he would have much rather they just divorced instead of indulged years of drama and uncertainty because it’s truly destabilizing for kids. Calm households where you know what to expect, even if parents are divorced, are much better for kids.
I think that’s exactly the problem: Affleck is not able to coparent by his own in the condition he is with his addictions now. I think she will wait until he gets better and clean and then she will trust him enough to finally divorce and get the kids half the time. Which is also probably exactly what Affleck doesn’t want: until now she was the present parent and do all the work, but after a divorce and which probably will be a shared custody Affleck will actually have to do 50% of the work, literally. And not only he is not able to do it right now because of his vices, he just doesn’t want to: he’s always put his career first and in a coparenting situation it all will change.
LOL at this article having an ad for another article ‘Are Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck Back Together?”
Those are not the slacks and socks of a woman about to get divorced and claim a new life for herself. Those are the slacks and socks of a woman who is putting her own needs second and just barely holding on for the sake of her family. Oh Jen… I’ve worn those socks and I feel for you.
She’s been wearing dowdy clothes for literal years.
Yes. And as a SAHM I find her clothes painful to behold. It’s not that difficult to look pulled together. She’s got the body and the money (and that sweater she’s wearing is $$$) but alas, no taste.
@Audrey She’s also been married to Ben for years… coincidence? lol
But you’re totally right, I was just being melodramatic, and reflecting on my own experiences when I dressed dowdy from sheer misery
Sidenote: A girl I know was wearing comfy shoes at TIF and Jen made a point of coming over and saying how much she wished she was wearing comfy shoes. At the time I was like, oh bless her she WOULD! Incidentally, there was a post on CG next day about how Jen had upped her shoe game that night. That always tickled me.
At various points in my life I have been dowdy and happy and stylish and miserable. It’s not an exact science.
Thank you!!!! I am a mom too and I still manage to at least attempt to look put together – wtf is she wearing????? Hideous, dowdy, baggy, cheap looking and boring, all at once. She is THE WORST DRESSER.
From Lainey’s yesterday—“Oh and also? Great timing for these sources to be talking to PEOPLE…you know…um… this week, almost like it’s … insurance? She’s always the one who’s had his back, always the one who saves him from himself.”
Anyone know what this means? I’m guessing she threatened to actually file for divorce to get him into rehab. (Booze or hard drugs?) Promise of possible reconciliation if he stays in rehab? What’s the “timing” and “this week” about?
I think Lainey was referring to the blind she put out this week – which everyone felt was about Ben and that he is in rehab.
Ok. Thanks. I was reading too much into it I guess.
I read it to mean Jen is covering for him again, I guess to deflect attention from him secretly being in rehab.
The old adage “when someone shows you who he is-believe him” really applies to this pair. She can’t let go of the fantasy that he will change, and he keeps showing her that chances are nil.
Get a kick ass therapist or life coach and learn to give up the ghost and move forward.
Totally agree. And I wish she would actually think about the message she’s sending to her kids. Would she want her daughters to settle for this???
Sometimes people do change. RDJ springs to mind.
People may think I am nuts but despite his flaws I still like Ben Affleck more than Matt Damon. He is pretty self deprecating and funny in interviews while Matt just comes across smarmy and arrogant.
It seems pretty clear that Ben has subtance issues and can’t keep it in his pants but I wouldn’t be surprised if Matt is a cheater on the sly. I am so cynical.
I totally agree with you! I feel like, at least Ben owns his sh8t and knows he’s an eff-up, but with Matt, I DEF get the same exact smarmy, secretively sleazy vibe.
You are cynical! I like both of them. Though Ben really must be pretty tough to cope with.
I still think that divorce is in their future. This is not a happy union. It’s pathetic when someone has resort to using a tabloid to publicly threaten their spouse into rehab. Until he decides for himself (on his own and without threats) to get help for his many problems, he is always going to struggle and relapse. I think this is a cycle that they’ve been through before: he screws up, they quietly separate, he spirals downward, she swoops in, he recovers, he gets comfortable and bored, screws up again. Repeat. He needs to figure his crap out on his own.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen Gossip Cop contradict a top-tier mag like People before regarding this saga. I found it interesting that GC disabled the comments section on that Ben’s Relapse story last week.
I just have to say, whenever a tabloid claims that “everyone seemed happy” or similar, I smell BS. It’s the kind of thing that deliberately builds up a flimsy story but it’s also not malicious enough to warrant any kind of denial if it’s not actually true (GC: “No, Ben did NOT seem happy!”). People Mag always does this with them.
That’s unfortunate.
As Sophia said on The Golden Girls, will one of you raise your standards already?
Ben will need more than 30 days of in patient rehab. He is 44 years old and has had a lot baggage. Then, when he is better, it will be partial and then out of patient rehab. I know because as a family we have experienced it. We saw patients who had severe addictions. Our beloved family member went to an expensive rehab and they had patients young and old from all over the country. We saw how hard it was for others especially the older ones to recover, to let go. Every little things trigger them to act negatively. A lot of anger and negative attitude from them.
I can’t imagine how JG has been dealing with this. The emotional aspect is too heavy to endure. The psychological abuse she has had to go through. I hope she gets to go into some sort of psychological rehab herself so she can also get better. It is tougher for her because she has to parent three young kids in Ben’s numerous absences.
Good luck to both of them!
Not just psychological abuse but emotional as well. Having sex outside your marriage is abusive to your spouse. The emotional and mental toll it takes is traumatizing, not to mention the physical aspects of cheating that put you at risk. The STD’s that you are exposing your spouse to is not worth endangering your health and life for.
Having sex with the woman who works in their home and takes care of their children was a deliberate act to cause her as much pain as possible. She wasn’t some starlet that didn’t mean anything and who could be easily forgotten, she was a person who had a relationship with the kids. Cruel. He really must have hated her to do that.
@PrincessDork Exactly! Imagine having that woman in your home taking care of your children. Both of them smiling in your face and they are having sex behind your back! Cruel is the word. Ben is a narcissist and Jen is his enabler.
Again, if Ben really hated her that much, he could have divorce her a long time ago even if JG refused to. What he did was even more cruel and put not JG but the kids in a very sad situation.
@Ana In my opinion he was trying to sabotage the marriage. He does that when he wants out. He cheated on Goop until she dumped him. He cheated on JLo with strippers right before their wedding and she was forced to call it all off. He has cheated on Jen for years with young, beautiful costars and she always took him back. The nanny though? He did that on purpose to hurt her to the extent that it couldn’t be ignored. He doesn’t want to turn into his father, a drunk disaster who had to leave his family to get well. I think hes a coward who doesn’t want to be the one to pull the plug.
If he checked into rehab because of ultimatums from Jennifer or warner bros. he will relapse.
^ ^ ^
This + I agree 100% – So sad
All this makes me appreciate stars who give “no comment” responses to private matters. ScarJo just said today that she will never talk about her divorce out of respect for her child. Jen needs to take notes.
Gossip cop denying yet another Ben and JLO together repot. Why bother? Today’s big news is that JLO is actually with ARod
Ben has quietly gone to rehab at least twice over the last 10 years. He’s been in intense psychotherapy for years as well as gone to marriage counseling with Jen. All of it is in an effort to convince himself that he really loves his wife and their home life together. Therapy, counseling, rehab, blah. It’s never been for the right reasons so it doesn’t stick. This is just another wash, rinse, repeat cycle. What could possibly be left to say to each other at this point? Is he going to promise to try harder this time? How many times do you think he’s made promises only to break them in humiliating fashion? Their very unhappy marriage is just pitiful. I do feel sorry for the kids.
If he’s at Cirque Lodge in Utah, week 3 of treatment is family week, Tues thru Friday. If he fled to rehab after the us weekly story, this week would be week 3. Who else would show up to his family week? lol Casey’s filming, his mom? Makes sense that his coparenting and great friend would be there. I hope she’s paying attention during those al-anon meetings.
so I checked the website, and this week is a week they have the family program. It states that it is given every 3 weeks, not necessarily the 3rd week a person is there. Ben has been awol since Super Bowl Sunday. It is possible that he has been there longer, my guess before that U.S. Mag article came out. Otherwise he would have come home 1 week after entering for the oscars which seems kind of quick. Okay enough for my detective skills.😀
Right. Is the Cirque website that other poster’s “insider info”? lmao rme Easy enough for anyone to find this info. As for when he went to rehab, who knows. There were sightings here and there the first few weeks of Feb.
LOL! You are funny! Great job as a detective.
At the Oscars, he didn’t look good. If he has been in treatment before then, he is still sick and has not passed stage 1 yet. It is a long recovery for someone like him.
I think that times seem correct. I think he’s entered rehab nearly a month ago and he’s only returned for the Oscars and for Sam’s birthday. I saw the picture of his agent’s wife who says: “eat pizza with family and friend”, not really a crazy party! be photographed in front of the rack of wines means to be drunk? I often drink Coke or soft drink with ice in a large glass, it does usual here in Italy
@Charlotte IDK. I hope he hadn’t been in rehab for that long. He still looked so terrible at the Academy Awards.
They are raising the next generation of addicts and enablers. Their dysfunctional relationship will screw up their kids in the long term,
That’s extremely harsh. No one knows how kids will turn out. Most people do their best. That may or may not be enough.
I understand this as a classical case of co-dependency on her part. This isn’t love, because they both don’t love themselves. This also isn’t solved by him attending whatever therapy for the sake of his family; it will probably only make him more miserable over time. It might even make him hate her at one point, because he thinks he’s doing it for her and the kids. And she can’t seem to let go of that picture of the perfect little family she seemingly worked so hard for, wheras somehow I tend to think it’s pure egoism. I feel sorry for the kids, they must get confused by this.
I’m skeptical. I know someone who was in rehab with him a few years ago. That’s all I can say. He’s probably participated in other treatment programs over the years and we were unaware. From personal experience I know that a person has to seek treatment for themselves, not to avoid something or because they’ve been issued an ultimatum. That only leads to resentment and relapse. The public has been shielded from knowing exactly how severe his addictions are because someone always covers up for him. Based on evidence that I have I really wonder if he’s even allowed to care for the children by himself for long periods of time. I think that was what was really behind him continuing to live on the property and the omnipresent nannies and/or Ben’s mom. Jen didn’t want the kids going to another house without her or nannies being close by. I don’t think there’s much trust there. I do think that the rough patch the tabloid alluded to was xmas vacation. I think some bad sh*t went down. It all took a turn for the worst, and now Ben’s apparently in rehab again. So there you go.
Do share as someone else said here we love gossip.
And I do agree that the Montana vacay must have been rough. Most observers went into it thinking they were basically back together. And maybe prior to that he had his vices somewhat under control and things were going well. LBN’s bad reviews came out right before the holidays. I imagine that must have hit Ben real hard, it was after all his pet project, that he maybe expected would have some Oscar buzz. I imagine he took this out on Jen, maybe got sloshed constantly. Does Matt and Casey not help out here? They were all supposedly with him and Casey claims to be sober for 3 years. Then the new year hit, Ben was basically not seen with the kids or Jen, no usual People puff piece saying what a great coparenting vacation they had together. Ben was spotted with the sober nurse the 1st week in Jan. then he promoted the movie for 2 weeks in the U.S. And abroad. LBN totally tanked both critically and box office wise. Not so great for this guy.
So hopefully we are all right (thank you Lainey). And he is in rehab and will really get better. Just to be there for his kids. They do really seem to adore him, always smiling when they are with him.
Sounds like if he didn’t go to rehab, she was filing. ..he went to rehab so tge divorce is off, but they’re not back together, just not divorced…
Okay..
I agree with other posters who think that this is just to deflect the tabs from running the rehab story. He really has struggled with addictions and needs to get well FOR HIMSELF and not for anyone else. That’s v important to maintaining recovery. It wouldn’t surprise me if Jen were participating in Family Week, she wants him to be well for their kids’ sake. However she really shouldn’t “save” him again. He needs to save himself. Their relationship seems toxic and codependent, and people and their patterns don’t really change. She said that in her VF interview I think. I hope she files for divorce and finds someone else. What a terrible way to live.
Us weekly commented on People’s story, too: “Not so fast. Despite recent reports that suggested Jennifer Garner has pressed pause on her plans to divorce husband Ben Affleck, a source exclusively tells Us Weekly that the actress, 44, is still considering a permanent split and she plans on moving forward when the time is right.” Does anyone else think that Jen’s PR is feeding stories to this tabloid? They had that she was going to file, and now they contend that she’s still going to “when the time is right.” She can’t really have him served with divorce papers while he’s at rehab. Whoever said upthread that their lives are held hostage by Bens addictions was r-i-g-h-t. Such conflicting angles. US Weekly: she’s going to divorce him when the time is right. People: she’s called off the divorce for now but they are not back together. ET/Enews: they have a ‘fluid relationship’ and nothing major has changed.
One thing is pretty clear: US weekly’s source must be legit. People never commented on their story that she was going to file. Not a peep. Now they’re claiming that she was telling friends that she was going to file. If us magazine’s source was accurate about her going to file, doesn’t it stand to reason that the source is accurate now? I think so. ETonline and Enews sources also don’t believe that divorce is off the table. It’s 3 against 1.
Yawn. Next…..
Full disclosure: I am team Affleck no matter what. I have a very weak spot for tall, self-absorbed, emotionally unavailable men with addictive personalities. Thank goodness I got smart and married a man who is the total opposite of my type. That being said, this latest stint in rehab is making Jen’s position more clear and more sad. She loves him. She doesn’t want to kick him when he is down. That does not make her a doormat. She doesn’t want to tarnish their children’s memories and ideas of their father anymore than they already have been. I believe that they have been honest with the children (in an age appropriate manner) about the situation. Just because they aren’t giving us the truth doesn’t mean they aren’t giving it the kids. I’m sure that they themselves don’t even know what the answers are. She is trying to hold on to their family and make sure that he doesn’t self-destruct. Is it her job to hold him together? No. But she does it and will continue to do it until she can’t anymore because of love. And co-dependency. I can’t blame her one bit for trying to protect him, help him to get well and hold onto what little she has. The odds for their marriage are not favorable. I don’t believe they were from the beginning. I just hope and pray that he gets better. For himself and for his family.
She’s a doormat. It’s not like Ben screwed up once and she’s forgiven him for a momentary lapse of judgment. He’s been an addict and a cheater for almost a decade of their joke of a marriage.
A reply like this makes me sad and mad. There are so many grey areas in a given situation that we can’t even fathom what they are. It is easy to say as somebody watching this family from the outside.
Soooo…nothing has really changed from before? Still not together and still not divorcing. What was the point of this announcement?
question: there was a young lady sitting by his side at the oscars..who was she? rehab nurse? (clearly a different one from the pics in early January?
She’s Busy Phillips,an actress, I think Michelle Williams’s BFF
No, I know who Busy is, I was talking about the other blonde girl at Affleck’s left (and Meryl’s right?)
I really think it was just a seat filler. They use them all the time at award shows. Even we celebs leave their seats to go present, they plunk a seat filler in their seat until they are back.
Ben should just file he wanted out anyways. If he has been in therapy for that many years it’s clearly not working at least on his side and is probably doing more damage. They would just be better off as friends. Jennifer just needs to let go and move on herself without him.
Let me guess, she’s pregnant? Isn’t this how she wound up marrying him in the first place?
I think they’re both addicts in different ways. Ben clearly has an addictive personality with drinking and cheating (although I fully believe he loves his kids, and I do hope he is able to get healthy.) And Jen – well, I think Ben is her addiction, and she’s proven that over and over again no matter how many times she makes empty threats about leaving. Those who say the only possible reason Ben stays is love don’t understand the complexities of relationships, especially dysfunctional ones. Love, fear and codependency can be hard to separate. My guess is these two might continue to make a strained effort to stay together for another few years. Ben’s always good when there’s a challenge, but I don’t really see it lasting long term.
I’m bored of these two. Nobody cares anymore if they’re together or not.
TMZ story today full-on denies any reconciliation and says they “get along” but divorce is still “very much on” and moving ahead. And contrary to what some others here predicted, it looks like Jen was in LA yesterday. (Granted, that’s doesn’t mean she hasn’t been to Salt Lake at any point either.). TMZ could be wrong and doesn’t seem to hint at any of the rehab rumors, but TMZ has been pretty restrained in its reporting on these two. They really haven’t bowed to the typical tabloid back and forth for the last two years. If that recent blind “four conditions” is true, then I don’t know how she repeatedly continues to overlook and get past the behaviors, including the alleged cheating, which that blind mentioned. I just don’t see them together as a couple anymore – don’t see anything there. They’ve had marriage-shattering problems for way, way too long at this point. But it”s anyone’s guess.