Lorde: In this #MeToo moment, ‘every man I know is having to check himself’

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Lorde covers the latest issue of Billboard, which serves as some kind of advance on the Grammys. The Grammys are shockingly early this year, they fall on January 27th. Everything moved up because of the Olympics in February, except for the Oscars, which got moved back to the first Sunday in March. Lorde is the only woman in the sausage party nominated for Album of the Year, a category which includes Kendrick Lamar (the odds-on favorite), Childish Gambino, Bruno Mars and Jay-Z. The Grammys are really trying to avoid #GrammysSoWhite, which is a good thing… except Billboard is still putting Lorde on the cover as the de facto (white) face of this year’s Grammys. Thankfully, Lorde is all about intersectionality, which she discusses at length with Billboard. You can read the full Billboard piece here. Highlights:

Silicon Valley billionaires are buying property in New Zealand: “Oh, yes, this is a thing. I think [PayPal co-founder] Peter Thiel was here. The getaway nature of it is very real — I always feel very unmoored from America when I’m here. I’ll get a work email, and I just laugh at how absurd it feels. It’s like it has traveled underwater or something. My main concern right now is what the tide is doing. I map my day around it. It’s high soon, so I’m going to go for a swim. I can bike over to the beach.

How she feels with the Album of the Year nomination: “It’s crazy I’m the only woman in my category, and I feel very proud of that. I’m wearing that mantle for sure. But I’m also stoked that I’m in there with four incredible artists of color — it’s a big moment for the Grammys. It’s exciting when these institutions move in the right way. To me, that is a huge victory.

Working with Jack Antonoff on Melodrama: “He manages to make you feel like he’s only working on your thing. The Bleachers album is what he was working on most of the time. Those two records were really happening side by side. It’s like when people have their babies around the same time and the babies are friends. We still FaceTime almost every day. When you work with someone, you sometimes think, “Maybe it will just be for this time, and we say we’re going to keep in touch but we won’t.” But we really … I’m like, “Hey, dickhead, what are you getting me for Christmas?”

She can’t stop talking about Jack Antonoff: “When I came to New York, we had only written together maybe a couple of times, and we were very obsessed with each other on a creative level and as buds. I was sort of doing nothing in New York, and we did this thing where for five days in a row we just kept having dinner every night, just getting to know each other. One night, somehow it came up that I hadn’t had Cap’n Crunch or Cinnamon Toast Crunch or Lucky Charms. He was like, “We have to do this.” So we went to a bodega, got all of these cereals and went back to his house in Brooklyn and did a little lineup of bowls. We tried, like, 20 different kinds of cereal. [Laughs.] I still think about Cinnamon Toast Crunch all the time.

Her prophetic tweet one year ago saying “old men in power have a storm coming, the likes of which they cannot comprehend.” “My prophetic tweet! [Laughs.] What is really interesting and important about this moment is that every man I know is having to check himself — having to be aware of his misogynistic biases, having to re-examine his understanding of consent. I think that is so overdue and so vital. It’s the kind of thing that only comes about when people are brave enough to share and really bring these dudes down. I think every woman is like, “Oh, my God, it’s happening.” A really important thing, that Gabrielle Union addressed eloquently, is that we can’t forget that white voices are given their moment much more willingly than voices of color. It’s so important to realize that people of color weren’t afforded this luxury of having everybody listen always. But for me, it feels like one of those things where there’s this chasm that opens and it’s never going to close. You don’t get to un-have this moment. This is forever, and the way this trickles down to everyone’s lives is a permanent thing.

[From Billboard]

“You don’t get to un-have this moment. This is forever, and the way this trickles down to everyone’s lives is a permanent thing.” I hope so. I hope that a year from now, two years from now, it’s not business-as-usual for patriarchy. It does feel like… this anger isn’t going away. But it’s more than that, like this anger has been bubbling up for decades and it just reached a boiling point in the sh-tstorm of the Stable Genius presidency.

As for what she says about Jack… I mean, I think she’s into him. I think he’s into her. That’s not the question – the question is “did he leave Lena Dunham for Lorde?” And I don’t have the answer to that.

2017 MTV Video Music Awards - Arrivals

Photos courtesy of WENN, cover courtesy of Billboard.

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39 Responses to “Lorde: In this #MeToo moment, ‘every man I know is having to check himself’”

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  1. Nicole says:

    Wow this was actually a really good interview. Sometimes I forget how young she is too. But intersectionality for the win. Okay Lorde *claps*

    • Amy says:

      Yes, she’s amazing. Everything she said here is good. I love how she can go back and forth from being silly and relatable (the cereal, “hey dickhead, what are you getting me for xmas?” to speaking eloquently about really important things like #metoo AND being able to push the conversation a little further by talking about POC and their struggle to be heard during this movement, and also her joy that 4 POC are up for album of the year

      • Nicole says:

        I’m definitely a lorde fan (seeing her in concert in april) but yea this interview was so good. I guess I’m used to having such a low bar too avoid being pissed off

    • Lucy says:

      Aw I love her , what I know about her anyway 💕
      She’s so pretty also in a unique way .

    • Slowsnow says:

      Yes, I really really like this woman. No one is perfect but she gets it and she is a very good writer, unlike Sheeran or Swift, who get credit for very poor writing.

      Unfortunately I am a bit disappointed with her album and her enthusiasm for Antonoff, but well. If that’s what gets her a platform so that she can say some wise words, so be it. I’ll always have Pure Heroine.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      I like what she said here. Well done.

  2. Lilith says:

    I love Lorde. She’s one mystical and witchy woman.

  3. Lucy says:

    She’s so wise. I bet you can talk to her about anything. As for her allegedly being into Jack…I don’t see why that would be a bad thing.

    • elimaeby says:

      I feel guilty because of the homewrecker vibe, but I am shipping this so hard! Please be true!

    • Lorelai says:

      IMO the only “bad” part about it is that she’s speaking so publicly about how close they were while he was still with Lena.

      I’m no Lena fan, but this made me feel really sorry for her.

  4. DazLondon says:

    Get a room already

    • NotSoSocialButterfly says:

      LOL- “I still think about cinnamon toast crunch all the time.”
      Interesting code term.

  5. Hh says:

    Jack and Lorde seem like they’d make a cute couple actually. While she tries to make their connection seem platonic, she gushed over him quite a bit. I mean, I would be concerned if someone talked like that about a bf of mine. Then again, I know many creatives and hippie types that can form deep, but platonic connections.

    Also, she walks around Brooklyn barefoot. I can’t get over that. Unless you’ve been to New York, you may not get why I’m thoroughly disgusted. Haha

    • Runcmc says:

      Yeah I would think they had an emotional affair during Lena and Jack’s relationship … and they’re kind of rubbing her nose in it. I don’t like Lena at all but this has to hurt for her to read.

      I live in Brooklyn and…omg, gross!!!

  6. JA says:

    I liked her a lot more before I knew the company she keeps. She is not as wise as she and everyone on here thinks but that’s ok, she’s young and grew up a bit too fast.

    • Other Renee says:

      Who is the “company she keeps” that you don’t like!

    • Nancy says:

      We’re twins. I was so intrigued by her, thinking she was older and “cool” lol. Then as I stated below I saw her and kind of gasped. I am not exaggerating when I say, the dance she performed (I think the Grammys a few years ago) had me in stitches. She was just a kid with Miss Taylor screeching from the front row. The fact that I’m posting twice about this is all the more reason one has to look at her performance!!!! Sorry, not sorry.

  7. Gaby says:

    Well, unless they actually cheated on Lena or she actively asked him to leave her, I see no problem with their relationship at all.

    If they had a connection, spent time together and eventually fell for each other, it sucks for Lena, but that happens sometimes. It’s very commom for people to be in a relationship where you are not “unhappy” but there’s a spark missing. And they can it find someone else.

    It’s not wrong for someone to fall out of love and end a relationship because they’ve realized they are in love with someone else, as long as they do the right thing and end the relationship before pursuing anything the other person.

    • Lucy says:

      This right here.

    • Erinn says:

      I think the MAIN thing is – when this kind of thing happens, you just have to do it as ‘honorably’ as possible. Be upfront. Don’t string the other partner along. Don’t put yourselves in situations that are ‘sketchy’. Realize your feelings or whatever – but make sure you don’t do something you’d regret or that would cause needless pain to someone else.

      As long as he broke up with Lena once he’d realized – I can’t fault him. I mean, it sucks. It’s not going to be easy. But it happens. And if you can look back on that sort of thing later, and see that MAYBE the other two people just made sense together and did their best to stay on the up and up, it’s not so bad. A lot of relationships will end – and pretty much no matter how that happens there’s going to be sore feelings and broken hearts. The thing that seems to make the biggest difference is open communication and not trying to be sneaky.

      • elimaeby says:

        You all are giving me life. I ended a marriage when I realized I was falling for my best friend. Said best friend and I have been dating and co-habitating for just over a year now, and we’re so happy. I have held guilty feelings since. Thanks for making me feel better.

    • GreenTurtle says:

      Yes, absolutely.

  8. Brea says:

    I loved Melodrama, it was pne of my favourite albums last year, but I feel like Kendrick is supposed to win AOTY since “To pimp a butterfly”. I’m torn on this

  9. Nancy says:

    When I first heard Royals, I thought, damn who is this. Loved the song. THEN, I saw her for the first time performing it on some award show where she did this freaky little dance and Tay Tay was in the audience doing her freaky little dance. She ruined the song for me! Sometimes it’s better for me to hear the song and not see it performed (especially when the performer is doing the Elaine Benes from Seinfeld dance). God made radios for a reason, one of them was Lorde. Good Lord.

    • Lucy says:

      So Taylor Swift partly ruined a song by having fun during her friends performance?
      Okay…

      • Nancy says:

        I thought Lorde was going to be older. I didn’t know she was still a teen. She has that smoky awesome voice, not what I envisioned. I guess on some level seeing her with Taylor, acting age appropriate, it did burst my bubble a bit. But, I don’t know any of her other music, but never turn off Royals if it happens to be playing. Never listen to Swift unless I hear her records coming out of my 14 yr old daughter’s room. It’s more her genre.

      • Slowsnow says:

        Come on Nancy, giver her a chance. Rimbaud stopped writing at 19 and is one of the most awesome French poets. Rappers have great lyrics and they are really young sometimes.
        Talent is talent.
        And Lorde got a lot of crap for dancing the way she does which is genuine and I find, very grown up, Curesque almost. That is, with unexpected influences and a self-assuredness that some very grown up people don’t have.

      • Nancy says:

        Slowsnow: She doesn’t need my stamp of approval, girl is doing fine. Not every singer has dancing moves. Rihanna doesn’t dance well either, but she is so damn slick and hot, it doesn’t what she does. That is what we do here, agree to disagree. I don’t dislike her, just not on my playlist.

      • Slowsnow says:

        @Nancy, sorry that sounded a bit condescending. Just reread myself.
        I was also put off by her friendship with Swift but her writing took me back to the good aspect of being a teen. And I do lover her music :-)

      • Nancy says:

        You’re cool chick!!

  10. Valiantly Varnished says:

    Wow. An interview with a celeb where I dont walk away actively hating their guts. It’s been awhile since that’s happened. I have always liked Lorde but I actually like her more now. She’s woke. Which is rare for a young white female pop star. *Insert side eye to Taylor and Miley.*

  11. MellyMel says:

    I love Lorde…loved her since Royals came out. I’m also here for any white woman genuinely understanding and speaking out on the importance of intersectionality.

  12. lucy2 says:

    Good interview, and she makes some good points.
    She’s definitely into Jack though. No one will be shocked when they debut as a couple.

  13. Domino says:

    I think we need to step back and let Tarana Burke lead the movement she started, not Hollywood. #metoo isn’t, I think, supposed to be about male inappropriateness necessarily but the very real ways in which women end up dead, in poverty, or in prison from defending themselves from sexual harassment and violence

    I worry that the voices of Burke and others are getting diluted.

  14. Shappalled says:

    ‘You don’t get to un-have this moment’

    I’m not so sure. A few years ago everybody was talking about addressing climate change but it doesn’t seem to be getting as much air time now.

  15. FF says:

    Sure, I guess, “write bigger checks to his accusers” could be interpreted as “checking oneself”.

    None of these guys have learned anything because the system hasn’t actually changed. But sure, they were nervous for five minutes, I guess, so… (they immediately started to use fake support of these said movements to cover their predatory trail.)

  16. Aerohead21 says:

    The thing about guys having to check themselves, or feeling like they’re victims of a witch hunt…as women we spend our entire lives being educated and preparing for abuse. Don’t wear short skirts, don’t walk alone, don’t leave your drink anywhere someone can drug it…etc, etc, etc. Men have never had to worry about if their pants were so flattering that a woman would lose control and rape him. They’ve never had that moment of leaving work after dark and dashing through the parking lot with your keys out ready to stab someone. They’ve not worried about being taken advantage of on a date and letting it happen because you’re more afraid of fighting than just getting out of there quickly. They don’t size up the men in a room to see who’s bigger or stronger. It’s time they checked themselves and consider what it must feel like to live like that and think of these things as CHILDREN. I have a 4 year old daughter and I’m already educating her about safety because of the creeps out there. I want it to be so ingrained by the time she hits high school/college, that she’s strong instead of scared.