Is Princess Eugenie’s fiance a moron? His grandmother thinks so.

Princess Eugenie of York, Jack Brooksbank at The Summer Party presented by Serpentine Galleries and Chanel in London

I’ve been trying to figure out how I feel about Princess Eugenie’s husband-to-be. I didn’t know much about him before the engagement announcement, and we haven’t really learned that much about him since. He runs in the same circles as Eugenie, he’s well-educated and it looked like he got a chemical peel before the announcement. Eugenie was the one who impressed me in the interview – she came across as the confident one, like she was the “star” of the couple. Well, now Jack’s grandmother has basically confirmed all of that and more. Grandma says her grandson is kind of a moron and then grandma does the British version of “bless her heart for agreeing to marry such a dumb-dumb.”

Princess Eugenie has been praised by her fiance’s grandmother for agreeing to marry her “charming” grandson — but joked he is not the “most intelligent”. Joanna Newton, 91, told MailOnline: “I never thought he would get married to a royal. He’s a charming boy and all that but not the most intelligent and I would never have thought this would happen.”

Brooksbank’s grandmother described him as a “good egg” and told MailOnline: “I think it says a lot about Eugenie that it’s him she wants and it’s lovely.”

The pensioner said her wine merchant grandson, 31, and his 27-year-old fiancee — who have said they will marry this autumn — had wanted to exchange vows in September but were now looking at October as their wedding month. The couple announced their engagement yesterday with a pink sapphire ring in what will be the second of two royal wedding this year following Prince Harry and Meghan Markle in May. With the Queen and Duke of Edinburgh traditionally spending September in Scotland at Balmoral, the month was unlikely to have been a serious contender for the wedding. The monarch usually returns from her summer break in the second week of October, making dates around the middle of that month the likely period for the royal nuptials.

[From News.com.au]

“I think it says a lot about Eugenie that it’s him she wants.” GRANNY SHADE. When your grandmother is basically telling the world that your fiancee could do better, that’s pretty bad (and hilarious). So now we know… maybe Eugenie is sort of settling for Jack Nice-But-Thick (as the Brits would say).

As for the speculation about the wedding… it’s not that friggin’ hard, people. The wedding will most likely be in early or mid-October. A lovely fall wedding!

Princess Eugenie and Jack Brooksbank in the Picture Gallery at Buckingham Palace in London after they announced their engagement

Princess Eugenie and Jack Brooksbank in the Picture Gallery at Buckingham Palace in London after they announced their engagement

Photos courtesy of WENN, Pacific Coast News.

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104 Responses to “Is Princess Eugenie’s fiance a moron? His grandmother thinks so.”

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  1. Ktae says:

    Ouch

    • Sabrine says:

      Not very nice of Granny. He does squeak in as a millennial and their conversational skills leave much to be desired since these phone zombies have never really learned people skills. Maybe she tried talking to him and it didn’t go that well.

      • meowren says:

        i’m hoping you were using your invisible sarcasm font when bashing millennials. ‘cause that was rude as f*ck.

      • jeanne says:

        rude as f*ck or true as f*uck?

      • stinky says:

        Someone just said Sabrine’s comment was ‘rude as f*ck’.
        This is why we cant have nice things.

      • Maria says:

        I think they both spoke well. How rude!

      • OG Cleo says:

        Are you an ocean? Because you’re salty as hell.

      • Shambles says:

        Oh hi. Hello. Millennial here. I’m a published author, I run a mindfulness blog, and I speak for a living. I teach yoga classes in a very articulate and coherent way, and talk with my students before and after class in conversations that prove to be most enriching for both of us. I am also the assistant to a mindfulness psychotherapist and I write copy for her social media (she’s not a millennial but GASP she also uses her phone/social media), and she often compliments my writing style which translates well into conversation. Your comment was so rude and so unnecessary. Completely off topic, since this article actually doesn’t have much to do with millennials at all, and mean-spirited. This is the second time in a week that commenters on this site have been millennial-bashing for absolutely no reason, and I’m going to have to stop coming to this site if it continues.

      • LizLemonGotMarried says:

        I’m with Shambles. I’m on the older side of millennial, and I’m a director for a fortune 50 and speak to groups and individuals internally and externally representing my channel for the company regularly. I’ve also conducted hundreds of second, third, and fourth interviews in hiring and find millennials engaged, focused, energetic, and excited when presented with a challenging opportunity that pays them enough to pay their bills, their college loans, and still have some money left over. This idea of millennials as phone focused inept individuals is ridiculous and born out of an insistence that the problems young people face are 100% of their own making without any regard for societal impact. If we can call them helpless, useless, and entitled, there’s no other accountability.

      • IndifferentCat says:

        Millennial bashing is born out of jealously. The older generations had all the opportunity in the world yet squandered it completely. Ruined the economy, destroyed the environment and now they’re crashing the earth for the future too. They think they’re too special to be at fault, so they chose to blame their own children instead. Sorry Boomers (or whatever you like to call yourselves), this ones on you and us Millenials are working twice as hard to get the world back on track. We even have time to take a few selfies along the way.

      • LAK says:

        Bashing the younger generations is as old as time. Every generation does it to the next. I’m gen x. We were written off as prozac taking ADHD idiots who couldn’t get out of bed due to generational angst.

        And we inherited a world recession too. We railed against the excesses of whatever generation was on top in the 80s and the 70s. And thought we could do better.

        In another generation, the millenials will be bashing the generation behind them. And they will be calling the millenials old and out of touch. *shrug*

      • Brittney B says:

        “these phone zombies have never really learned people skills”

        I didn’t get a cell phone until I was sixteen, and I didn’t get one with Internet until I was in my 20’s. Try again.

      • Ennie says:

        younger generations also make fun and criticize the older… so we’re even?
        maybe it was a blanket generalization, but many (not all) of the younger ones loathe reading anything longer than a synopsis. I work in schools , and I blame the permissive parents for allowing too much unsupervised screen time, many just end up texting and gaming.

      • LAK says:

        Ennie: That may be currently true, but in another decade, they’ll shape up and take responsibility and the cycle will begin again with *their* children.

      • Susie says:

        I’m with the Millennials on here. We really, really need them to clean up the messes we made. Also my sons are millennials and they’re awesome. I think their priorities are more of the kinder, gentler sort and that’s what the world needs.

      • veroS says:

        I think not insulting someone is an important part of being a good conversationalist. If I have a conversation with someone who is a bit awkward, but polite, I will rate them a better conversationalist than someone who is just outright rude and judgemental.

        My mother taught me if I don’t have anything nice to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. It’s a pity whoever raised you failed to teach you the same. Allow me to pass on my mother’s advice.

        And for the record, I am a millennial and I can carry a conversation in three different languages. I don’t think you need to worry about millennials and our conversation skills.

    • Let It Be says:

      Well, there is something George W–esque in his blank expression in the top photo. Just saying.

      • anon says:

        being smart isn’t only about being book smart and reading and talking about books. you can’t run a business being stupid.
        i think he looks artless with no artifice, not blank. most of us wear masks.

    • Princessk says:

      Most of these stories are derived from DM and so I would take this story with a pinch of salt. However, I am rather glad, and so must poor Meghan be, that the spotlight is off her for a while and people have somebody else to bitch about. I think that the content of the DM article was amended several times. It originally stated he had met ‘granny’ only once in seven years and then this was removed, if it was Meghan they would have kept it in and gone further and stuck it in the headline. Tricking a very elderly lady into saying things about her grandson that I am sure she had no idea would be printed in the Daily Mail, out of context, is actually shameful journalism.

    • Bread and Circuses says:

      I hope Eugenie is very kind to him, because apparently some of his family are not.

      • Ama says:

        Come on, this page is called Cele-bitchy…we all came here to read some bitchy news about celebrities. LoL

  2. Margo S. says:

    Lol, I was wondering why he was so red and shiny in the photos! Why is Eugenie marrying a moron? And they are cousins? Sounds like quite a few strikes.

  3. Guest says:

    Lmao….

  4. minx says:

    Real nice, grandma.

  5. Erinn says:

    Oh my god, that is granny shade indeed.

    I have a grandmother who says these sort of things – never with an ill intention (well, almost never – she can hold a grudge against people who have outright wronged her) but in her own sort of way – it’s also a brag. “A ROYAL is marrying MY grandson. He’s a kind, sweet, well meaning kid – but he’s not some flashy, genius, most eligible bachelor – and she loves him anyway”. And I’m picking up a certain amount of pride in that. Not only that her grandson is a ‘good egg’ – but the royal who is marrying him is clearly marrying him for love. Like – this fancy, intelligent, worldly PRINCESS could have her choice of men. And she’s fallen for my “kind-but-thick” grandson – she is indeed a lovely girl.

    I mean- it’s never the greatest when a relative speaks to the press. But as far as most go – this is pretty tame.

    • notasugarhere says:

      That’s how I read it too.

    • Who ARE these people? says:

      Now that I live in Canada and language is more read between the lines, I am inclined to see it this way. “He’s our ordinary Joe and she still picked him, eh? He’s a good boy.”

    • edith says:

      yes, this is exactly how I read that, too!
      she says “its lovely”, and “that says a lot about her” is meant as a compliment, not shade

    • HH says:

      Exactly. It didn’t sound mean-spirited. Also, I’d rather have this honesty than those people who think their children or grandchildren can do no wrong and are perfect angels.

  6. Rapunzel says:

    With grandmas like this, who needs enemies?

    • Shannon says:

      My thoughts exactly! Now I feel bad for the kid.

      • Mac says:

        She sounds just like my mother in law. Nasty old lady who frequently refers to one of her grandsons as “gormless.” For no reason, he is a great kid.

  7. Lucy says:

    …Yeah, I don’t find it all that funny.

    • Izzy says:

      Me either. She just sounds mean.

    • khaveman says:

      Yeah Gran, just say you wish them well instead of going into all that. YEESH. All of the folks “reading between the lines” and all that, I think strangers may just go on face value, so at best her comments are confusing, and seem harsh, to outsiders.

  8. Other Renee says:

    I think Granny needs to be left off the wedding guest list. She’d probably just spend the whole time telling a bunch of tasteless stories about stupid things he did as a kid.

    • minx says:

      Either she’s got dementia or she’s just a mean old hag. Your grandson just got engaged, leave those remarks for family, not the press.

      • Erinn says:

        I think ultimately, the press needs to stop seeking this sort of thing. Don’t go looking for a quote from a 90 something year old. It’s kind of weird and predatory.

    • Giddy says:

      I had an adored great-aunt who was prone to this sort of thing. At my “first” wedding reception she enthroned herself on a large chair near the bar, and regularly announced in ringing tones “It will never last!”. She was right, it didn’t, but it was very embarrassing at the time.

      • Kumquat says:

        Oh dear! Time to shove granny in a cab home after the second such announcement. (I’d have assumed the first time was a distasteful joke)

  9. Anon says:

    I think you mean Tim Nice-But-Dim

  10. Sayrah says:

    Jeez grandma. Is she well? It’s like the reporters preyed on an old woman who has no filter anymore.

    They look very happy together. Best wishes to them.

  11. littlemissnaughty says:

    Sh*t, grandma doesn’t play. I don’t understand how you can say this to the press. There is NO world in which this isn’t a mean move. I do not want to know what this family is like around the dinner table.

  12. Peeking in says:

    For an instant I thought she was wearing the same dress in all the pics.

  13. Ib says:

    Hahahahahahahahaha

  14. Tina says:

    This is a very English thing to do. She doesn’t actually mean it. She’s clearly very proud of her grandson. I don’t know how or why to explain it. It’s just how a lot of people are. It’s self-deprecation taken to absurd heights.

    • Who ARE these people? says:

      Isn’t it sort of, “out of all the laddies in the world she picked our humble Jackie?”

    • Micki says:

      I think that she’s underlining the self-deprecation a bit thickly for the international comunity. I’ve read it as in “He’s a very ordinary boy, nothing special about him.” Self-important bragging is a bad form.
      Only that he’s a self-made man and doing quite well at that.

    • Tina says:

      There’s a bit in Kate Fox’s book Watching the English where she talks about this. About watching middle class mothers (who are very proud of their sons) talk about them in such deprecating terms, “Oh, our Arthur, bless him, he can barely read.” Like competitive putting down. When in reality they think their children hung the moon.

      • Micki says:

        I have Watching the English. It was an eye-opener. And the competitive putting down is a thing. I’ve always thought it’s a fun way of avoiding bad Karma.

    • littlemissnaughty says:

      That may be but a) this isn’t a UK outlet and b) someone knew this would go around the world. Maybe not grandma but someone else did.

    • BearcatLawyer says:

      That’s what I thought. Typical self-deprecation of upper class Brits. Boasting is just not done.

  15. anika says:

    So both Meghan and Jack have such supporting families!

  16. L84Tea says:

    Ouch Granny. Cold as ice…

  17. Who ARE these people? says:

    More interested in his promotion to wine merchant

    • CynicalCeleste says:

      This! He was a nightclub manager yesterday.

    • Sharon Lea says:

      Yes, I’d like to more about this career switch too. I thought ambassadors were basically models that work a trade show or event, so this has me puzzled.

  18. Realitycheck says:

    It doesn’t seem like any of the royals had a great pool of people to choose from.

  19. HeyThere! says:

    My grandfather is pretty much crazy and says nothing that is correct or that makes sense. I wonder if his grandmother is like my grandfather? I don’t find it funny since I have horrible memories of my grandfather saying the most horrible things to me….non of which were correct or appropriate!

    • Ally says:

      He probably had dementia. It’s usually pretty subtle at first, but that’s a classic sign. Of course a child doesn’t understand that though.

  20. Alexandria says:

    I’m not English but I’m just seeing ol English humour here. Granny can’t jolly joke this way about the Princess (I’m sure she’s aware the BRF are not known for their brains anyway).

  21. Lara says:

    I think she wanted to make a compliment to the bride.
    I remember quiet a few wedding speeches where the parents or the grandparents basically said that their kid is nice, but the new daughter or son could have made a so much better match and their kid should be lucky and take care to keep him or her. Its a bit twisted but polite welcome to the family.
    If the speech is all about how great their kid is and how lucky the new daughter or son in law it is a gigantic shade.

    • Elle says:

      Yup this checks out. While my parents talked about how glad they were to welcome my husband to the family, my father in law (who felt marrying in our late 20s after 7 years dating and living together was waaay too young!) said something to the effect of ‘What a wonderful son I’ve raised… truly the best of sons… who in the world could deserve such a man? And he chose you so OK.’ Bless him.

  22. manta says:

    joked he is not the “most intelligent”.

    Key word here would be JOKED. And in in the same breath she calls him charming and a good egg. I saw the same thing some other posters saw: humour and deprecation, all while complimenting the bride.
    Lumping her with some Markle’s family members is a tad much at this point.

  23. Talie says:

    Well, at least Meghan gets a break as not the only one who has a rogue relative or two.

  24. perplexed says:

    I thought maybe she was using British humour or something, but then I was like, nah, she’s just mean.

  25. Jessica says:

    Ummm… “Brooksbank’s grandmother described him as a “good egg” and told MailOnline: “I think it says a lot about Eugenie that it’s him she wants and it’s lovely.”

    There’s no shade in this sentence.

  26. Mumbles says:

    As an American I only say this as a distant observer, but it strikes me that these British upper classes aren’t the most intellectually curious bunch. All their friends seem to be nightclub owners or fashion publicists or competitive skiiers etc. You don’t see a lot of doctors or lawyers or academics in that crowd. I would say of the bunch, Prince Charles has expressed the most interest in ideas like architecture and environmentalism and he’s viewed as a bit of a weirdo because of it.

    I read somewhere that the daughter of tbe Duke of Westminster (the richest man in England) was a prison reform activist and I was gobsmacked that someone of that social stature and wealth actually was interested in something so challenging and socially useful. But she seems to be the exception to the rule.

    And of course you don’t have to be “book smart” to live a useful life. Diana often mocked her own academic background but did a lot of work for good causes.

  27. Mumbles says:

    As an American I only say this as a distant observer, but it strikes me that these British upper classes aren’t the most intellectually curious bunch. All their friends seem to be nightclub owners or fashion publicists or competitive skiiers etc. You don’t see a lot of doctors or lawyers or academics in that crowd. (I think Chelsy Davy was a lawyer for a while but now sells jewelry.) I would say of the bunch, Prince Charles has expressed the most interest in ideas like architecture and environmentalism and he’s viewed as a bit of a weirdo because of it.

    And it’s not as if they’re not educated. But it’s as if University is just an opportunity to hang out with their friends for a few years.

    I read somewhere that the daughter of tbe Duke of Westminster (the richest man in England) was a prison reform activist and I was gobsmacked that someone of that social stature and wealth actually was interested in something so challenging and socially useful. But she seems to be the exception to the rule.

    And of course you don’t have to be “book smart” to live a useful life. Diana often mocked her own academic background but did a lot of work for good causes.

  28. jferber says:

    He may be a moron, but he’s not a horse face, which may be a fair trade-off for the royal family. Only Diana and Harry’s bride-to-be were intelligent, beautiful people with a lot to offer. Of course, that’s why Diana was hounded to her death, but I hope for better treatment for Diana’s soon-to-be daughter-in-law. Even the royals can learn something, hopefully. Harry is also a decent man, unlike his father. Harry inherited a lot of good things from his mother.

    • spidee! says:

      Diana was in a car which was being driven too fast by someone who had been drinking. And she was not wearing her seatbelt.

      • graymatters says:

        And she had a history/habit of calling the paps to let them know where she was. I’m not sure “hounded” is the right word, unless you’re referring to her own personal demons.

  29. Connell says:

    Jack did not go to University, he went right to work. She is at least 90, and perhaps did not realize her quote would go world wide. Jack wants to be a businessman, he wants to open his own pubs someday. He seems hardworking, has definite plans for the future. He doesn’t seem dumb to me.

  30. Pandy says:

    I’m not buying that Eugenie is an intellectual giant herself, so …

  31. Her Higness says:

    I met her once during her activism work, as I work with victims, and she was so sweet & authentic. I dont know their relationship but i hope they have waaaaaaaay more chemistry than what comes through in these photos.

    • Who ARE These People? says:

      1. They’ve been together 7 years
      2. They seem quite delighted with each other
      3. These are formal photos of British royalty
      4. Chemistry is a funny thing

    • CynicalCeleste says:

      More natural in the video I think, than PH & MM who came off as a bit contrived. For example, I believe this engagement story; while I felt like PH & MM’s engagement story was made up for public consumption along with their ongoing awkwardness around their dating timeline… Fair enough, why wouldn’t they wish to keep some their own details private. The result though is that their words ring a bit false. Whereas these two come across as more simply genuine. Less spotlight pressure helps I suppose. Pretty certain Wills & Kate made up their engagement story too which in reality involved a late night brokering session with Carole and a lot of whisky.

  32. No One Knows says:

    Granny is a standard upper crust c-u-next-tuesday. What an abusive bitch. I imagine everyone in my family would have something different to say about me. None of them know me, and they’re white supremacists who are literally in are sex cult, so they not only have no opinion, but are abusive asshole for pretending like they know me. Granny is a bitter bitch because he’s marrying into the royal fam and she’s stuck with a dead house and no chance of improving her station. Bye, ya old bag.

    • Olenna says:

      OMG, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. But, I do hope everything is OK, outside the family, of course.

  33. Elizabeth says:

    If they got married at Balmoral, they could still do it in September.

  34. Flaming Oh says:

    Lol at nice but dim Burn Granny burn

  35. Mari says:

    In that second picture especially, he looks like a young “W,” doesn’t he? Maybe they’re related!

  36. Anthea says:

    They say the same about Beatrice

  37. Kaz says:

    So where does Mr Brooksbank get all his money from? Family money? Savings from his bar work?