Sen. Ted Cruz: ‘I think the Democrats are the party of Lisa Simpson’

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If you want to protect your sanity, don’t read any of the quotes coming out of the annual CPAC conference, which is basically a conference where rich, gun-toting psychopaths unite to praise each other and try to win the “who is the most disgusting person in the world?” contest. Yesterday’s contest winner was Dana Loesch, spokesperson for the NRA. She actually walked up there and gave a speech about how the media loves it when there is a mass shooting at a school:

But if we talk about that See You Next Tuesday, my eye will start to twitch and I may start to see spots. So let’s take it down a notch, to Ted Cruz. Ted Cruz entered the CPAC stage to what I’m assuming was a sad-clown-horn cue, and this was his opening:

During an appearance at CPAC on Thursday, The Federalist founder Ben Domenech began his interview with Senator Cruz (R-TX) with a reference from The Simpsons.

“Homer points out that guns are for things like protecting your family, hunting delicious animals and making sure that the king of England never shows up to push you around,” Domenech told Cruz, who replied, “All good things.” Continuing on, Domenech said, Lisa Simpson told her father that the Second Amendment is “a relic, a remnant of the Revolutionary War era” and “doesn’t really mean anything anymore.”

“I think the Democrats are the party of Lisa Simpson,” Cruz responded, “and Republicans are happily the party of Homer and Bart and Maggie and Marge.”

[From The Daily Beast]

Lisa Simpson is the smart one, the straight-A student, the one member of the family with a social conscience and an interest in other cultures, other religions, other ways of living. That’s what’s being mocked here, clearly. Ted Cruz thinks the Lisa Simpsons of the world are lesser beings, because we’re not ignorant, gun-toting, tunnel-visioned a–holes. Besides that, many Simpsons experts point out that Marge is likely a Democrat (she voted for Jimmy Carter) and that Bart is probably more of a libertarian, if anything. Oh, and Lisa does become president one day on the show.

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161 Responses to “Sen. Ted Cruz: ‘I think the Democrats are the party of Lisa Simpson’”

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  1. Hh says:

    It’s definitely not an insult, but I’m ashamed that we have a leader who thinks it is. And who makes a Simpsons reference about a serious issue?

    • whatWHAT? says:

      and what they don’t even seem to realize is that Matt Groenig (or whoever wrote what Homer said) is MOCKING gun owners. “so the King of England never shows up to push you around” is, to me, VERY obviously mocking the claim of gun owners that they’re protecting themselves from “the tyranny of gov’t”.

      • bettyrose says:

        Says you. I stay up at nights worrying that the kind of England will invade. The fact that England hasn’t had a king in my lifetime does not mitigate those fears. :-p

      • Raina says:

        If these types of people understood mockery or could read the room, they wouldn’t want to get out of bed in the morning.
        What students ate doing post the tragic shooting is being vocal, courageous and extremely inspiring to me!! These kids, like my son, are the future.

    • NotSoSocialButterfly says:

      A professional panderer, that’s who. You know he’d cry like a newborn if an angry someone with a semiautomatic weapon approached him.

    • bettyrose says:

      OMG! I saw the headline and was like “Is that supposed to be a bad thing?”

      WTF? Lisa Simpson is awesome.

      • Raina says:

        Haha. I always found Lisa to be the sensible one. It’s funny that Penguin thinks it’s a bad thing. Even Bonespurs McGee hates him

    • Raina says:

      I’ll tell you who makes comments like this; A walking, talking Penguin Villlain look-a-like. This is like a bad comic.
      And now his boss thinks a solution to gun control is arming the teachers so the kids can go to the school like it’s the Wild West.
      Hey Penguin Psycho, take Clint East-Orange and walk off a cliff.

      • Swack says:

        Not only that but he wants to give those teachers a bonus. Taught 30 years and those who should not be having a gun in the school will because they will want that bonus. Not to mention where the funding for it will come from.

      • Leviathan says:

        It’s a strange thing to add to a teacher’s job description. “Oh by the way, you’re now expected to engage gun fights should the need arise”

      • Dazed and Confused says:

        I am a teacher and we were discussing this today. The consensus was most of us would leave the profession rather than work in a building where teachers have guns. This from new and established teachers. Even if we were able to say we didn’t want one, we don’t want to work where any teachers have a gun.

      • bettyrose says:

        As awful as it is to even envision the scenario, I’m absolutely confused on the logistics. Like, a teacher is supposed to lock the classroom door and/or shepard students out an emergency exit, all while returning fire, like some sort of fantastical action movie hero? Teachers do amazing things all the time, but this seems unrealistic.

  2. bluhare says:

    Then #I’mwithher.

  3. Esmom says:

    I saw the headline yesterday and didn’t bother to read it because exhaustion…but my first thought was “who wouldn’t want to be the Lisa Simpson of anything?” I am finding it hard to go on in this vein of discourse, though, lol. Because exhaustion.

    • Kitten says:

      The CPAC stuff should be avoided at all costs if you’re already burnt out on our current hell.

      It’s really, REALLY terrible. Those NRA people are some of the worst out there.

      • HH says:

        Your advice is too late for me, Kitten. It was absolutely disgusting. Did they also clap along to those disgusting remarks because of their “economic anxiety?” That excuse seems to cover some wide bases these days.

      • Kitten says:

        Right?!? The optics of these people clapping and cheering for the largest gun lobbying organization in our country in the wake of another mass shooting is just…no words to describe how despicable these people are.

      • Esmom says:

        Yeah, I’ve seen clips and articles here and there, very hard to stomach. I was feeling ready to find a way to leave this country behind, especially as a friend just told me about an amazing trip he just took to New Zealand. Sigh. But the latest Pod Save America made me feel a little better. Hopefully those monsters at the CPAC are a dying breed.

      • Swack says:

        And guess who went to the CPAC convention today and is praising the NRA.

    • Otaku Fairy says:

      Exactly. Who would actually want to be the Homer Simpson of anything?

  4. Vex says:

    homer voted for obama, there was a cold-open where the voting machine was rigged and switched his vote to mccain, i seem to remember. also, marge used to burn her bra and read ms. magazine – she’s not a republican.

    i don’t understand how anyone can use lisa simpson as an insult, she’s a delight.

    • Esmom says:

      It shows how idiotic Cruz and those goons are, that they can’t even recognize scathing satire and social commentary.

    • Elkie says:

      In the series President Lisa was the woman elected to clear up all of President Trump’s mess!

      Still, at least this shows that Ted Cruz sometimes watches something other than incest porn…

    • INeedANap says:

      Also how DARE he try to put a political spin on Maggie, she’s a baby for pete’s sake.

      • jwoolman says:

        Ineedanap- I dunno. Maggie probably is a future Ted Cruz voter. That is one scary baby. She just seems superficially harmless because she’s small and nonverbal. She might reform later, the game indicates that she grows up to be a punk rocker.

        Homer isn’t a Republican and neither is Marge. That’s already been established in the show, and it’s pretty obvious from other observations. There are other characters identified as Republicans, though, so it’s politically balanced. In the game, I had to keep Dr. Hibbard busy gambling all through the last half of 2016 so he couldn’t attend Republican meetings and hopefully would forget to vote.

        Bart is pretty much out for Bart, although he isn’t quite as bad as The Donald. I don’t see him even voting in future years. The show and the game indicate that Bart is still mooching off his parents while his sister Lisa is POTUS.

    • Lizzie says:

      b/c anti-intellectual assholes loves to tease people for liking books and museums and music and the arts.

      • jwoolman says:

        Lizzie – and Ted Cruz is a National Merit Scholar so he’s mocking himself, trying to be one of the gang even at his age.

    • jwoolman says:

      I play The Simpsons:Tapped Out on my phone and basically will earn or buy with donuts (premium currency) almost anything little Lisa wants. She’s so abused, she deserves it! I drew the line at 200 donuts for her recycling plant in the water, although if there’s ever a good sale….

  5. greenmonster says:

    Homer and Bart also carry a rare genetic mutation in them (only affecting male family members) that turns them into dumb idiots after 8 or 9 years of life. So Cruz might have a point there.

  6. smcollins says:

    Team Lisa

  7. Juliette says:

    I’m a proud Lisa Simpson

  8. RBC says:

    So… while families of the 17 murdered people are burying or preparing to bury their loved ones. This person uses the example of a fictional, animated tv family to make a point against any type of gun control and at the same time insult democrats.
    Is he for real?

    • BearcatLawyer says:

      Sadly, yes. I try very hard not to think about the fact that he is one of my state’s senators. 😭😭😭

    • km says:

      Everything you said RBC. I initially thought this was a joke. I am sitting here in utter disbelief at the stupidity and lack of empathy of these people. It is truly disgusting that in the wake of 17 people being murdered this is the discussion they are having. Just when I think they can’t sink any lower they do. Also, how is being like Lisa Simpson an insult to anyone???

    • lucy2 says:

      Isn’t this insane? Purely insane. And disgusting.

    • Parigo says:


  9. QueenB says:

    Getting Homer to vote for you is not something to brag about.

    Whats shocks me more is: Gwen Stefani is older than Ted Cruz.

  10. LizLemonGotMarried (aka The Hufflepuff Liz Lemon) says:

    This f*cking guy…. like, that’s an insult? Lisa was a genius, Homer was a terrible person and Marge was a saint for putting up with him-she was NOT on their side.

    Also-has everyone seen the cartoon with Bobby Hill as a couples’ counselor? If not, grab a tissue.

    • Aang says:

      Thanks for the link, that was sad. Bobby Hill is my favorite cartoon kid ever.

    • SlightlyAnonny says:

      Sweet cheese. I loved the Simpsons as a kid, never had an interest in Family Guy but then fell in love with King of the Hill. The Hills were really the only healthy family, weren’t they?

  11. Snowflake says:

    I can’t stand this guy. Trump insulted his wife and Cruz was still going to work for him! But he didn’t end up getting the position he was considered for. I don’t remember what the position was.

  12. lightpurple says:

    Correction: Sen. Grandpa Munster: “I think the Democrats are the party of Lisa Simpson.”

    • Christin says:

      I was about to post that he has a second career waiting, should there ever be a Munsters remake. So does his buddy Paul R (as Eddie).

  13. Lani says:

    Maggie is a sociopathic baby who engages in gun violence so she’s definitely a republican.

  14. C. Remm says:

    That is why D. Loesch homeschools her kids and LaPierre keeps his family status secret. They are so brave and so schizophrenic.

  15. littlemissnaughty says:

    Melting Skin Suit over there just burned himself. Also, he belongs to the party of the p*ssy grabber in chief so what are we even talking about? They’ve sunk so low that they’ve started insulting themselves?

  16. Shannon says:

    Um … why would he think that’s an insult? Lisa was always my favorite character. But lately, it seems like Republicans are completely embracing stupidity and ignorance, like you’re just SUCH an elitist a-hole if you have the nerve to have a college degree.

    • Anne says:

      I figured it’s just sour grapes. They know they’re not going to get very many votes if they try to target educated people. Then their constituents might ask them to make a legitimate argument as to why they’re doing the crap they’re doing. Much easier to cater to the lowest common denominator.

    • isabelle says:

      Basically smart people don’t believe their propaganda, fake news, lies and conspiracy theories, so they must be destroyed and attacked. Republicans=propagandists. Vote them out on November the 6th.

  17. Rapunzel says:

    This hatred of intellectualism is what makes the deplorables so deplorable. I can’t believe in today’s day and age that we seriously aren’t valuing intelligence anymore. It’s frightening. Apparently the GOP wants us to be beer swilling, Donut munching couch potatoes who don’t give a sh*t about anything and can’t do anything right.

    • Carmen says:

      Try to make a valid point to a republican and invariably their response is “That’s your education talking.”

      • Lizzie says:

        you’re so right. like – yea asshole that is my education talking. as if being educated is bad and somehow an easy way out. um excuse me but working part time and going to college for 4 years and leaving with 100k in debt a year before the entire economy and housing market collapsed wasn’t exactly easy but ok. sorry i wanted to secure a more economically viable future?

        i work in manufacturing and i hear that shit a lot b/c the hourly workers hate the salaried workers. they never stop to realize that we both work overtime but they get paid for it and since i am in finance i know for a fact that my salary at the end of the year is less than most of the production workers who get overtime.

    • Jker says:

      Rapunzel: you hit the nucleus of this entire issue and partisan divide in the Drumph era.

      Their personal failings and insecurities manifest in their gun obsession, choice of religion over science, and simple, often crass, language over intelligent, multi-syllabic verbiage.

      Trump makes them feel better about themselves in a world that often reminds them how otherized they would or do feel in the positions and institutions of power.

      Or put in deplorable speak:

      Dems are annoying, full of themselves Lisa Simpsons’ and us deplorables are the proud copies of homer simpson.

    • BearcatLawyer says:

      Intelligence and common sense lead to critical thinking. Thinkers are harder to manipulate and control. Ignoramuses can be herded like lambs to slaughter…which is what this administration seems intent upon inflicting upon everyone except their 1% buddies.

    • Esmom says:

      It’s interesting, though, that the conservatives in my town, as much as they seem to try to adhere to GOP talking points, are still sending their kids to college. Because they know a degree is critical to certain jobs. The difference from when I was in college seems to be that those parents aren’t just sending them off but cautioning their kids about the “dangers” of campus life — not sexual assault or binge drinking but “liberal indoctrination.” As if professors have time to include indoctrination in their curriculum. Sigh.

      • Rapunzel says:

        Esmom- the liberal indoctrination stuff is infuriating. I teach at a Comm. College and it’s all I can do to make students write complete sentences; I ain’t got time to brainwash them into the LBGTQ globalist agenda!

      • jetlagged says:

        @Rapunzel – I spent two years at a Comm College before transferring and I vividly remember one Poli Sci class taught by a “liberal” instructor. This being Seattle, I wouldn’t say he was any more liberal than any other person there, but for some reason the local Repubs thought he was the devil incarnate. They actually enrolled one of their own in this class to “monitor” what was being taught and to speak up if they thought the instructor had stepped over some imaginary line.

        To be honest, I don’t remember much of the actual curriculum, but I learned a lot – about bias, about critical thinking, about looking at two sides of an issue and making up my own mind. The instructor knew who the guy was, but treated him like any other student and didn’t say anything until the last day. Most of the students had figured something was off, but weren’t quite sure what. Once we knew, we were all ticked off the conservatives thought we needed to be “protected” from ideas and that we weren’t savvy enough to recognize inherent bias when we heard it.

        Fun fact – after community college, I transferred to Matt Groening’s alma mater.

      • trumptrickle says:

        I assume they’re talking about the handful of humanities/literature/soc studies classes that all bachelors degrees have as general ed requirements. There isn’t really a “liberal indoctrination” way to do accounting or calculus.

    • Kitten says:

      I have to take issue with one thing: beer isn’t anti-intellectual. Good craft beer is delicious and craft breweries are small businesses that should be supported.

      How about this? :

      “Apparently the GOP wants us to be Duff swilling, Donut munching couch potatoes who don’t give a sh*t about anything and can’t do anything right.”

      Duff is basically an Anheuser-Busch beer 😉

    • isabelle says:

      When you are propagandists spreading lies, fake news, propaganda and conspiracy theories they have to strike down intelligence. It exposes them as the liars they are so they needed to control the message by attacking intelligence. Its age old fascist and totalitarian tactic. Mussolini would love the Republican party in its current state.

      • magnoliarose says:

        Absolutely true. They need stupid to rule. That is how Paraguay ended up so effed up. The psychopathic dictator was able to nearly wipe out 60 percent of the population because they lacked education in the 19th century.

    • Parigo says:

      I wish we could just “like” posts on this site, because so many are so spot on. I have nothing to add and feel useless here. You’ll are right on.

  18. LooseSeal says:

    The Homer Simpson quote is already making fun of how out-dated the second amendement is! The joke is that Homer can’t see it even as he’s saying it. You don’t have to be Lisa Simpson to figure that out.

    • whatWHAT? says:

      “The Homer Simpson quote is already making fun of how out-dated the second amendement is!”

      exactly the point I made above. but they’re so stupid that they don’t even know when they’re being mocked.

      it reminds me of when Reagan’s campaign used Springsteen’s “Born in the USA” as a theme song (until BS put the kibosh on that) because they didn’t realize that it wasn’t an ode to how great the US is, but how it’s failed it’s veterans.

  19. Mabs A'Mabbin says:

    Of course we’re debating The Simpsons with this administration and gun violence. Makes perfect sense to me. Excuse me while I cue up Idiocracy in preparation for our futures. Anyone have an extra toilet… I’m carving my sofa tonight.

    • Elkie says:

      We’ve gone well past Idiocracy. President Camacho actually listened to scientific evidence and hired the smartest man on Earth to be part of his administration.

      • Mabs A'Mabbin says:

        Shit, that’s right. I guess we’ll be drinking Brawndo until someone invents us a ‘time masheen.’

  20. Indiana Joanna says:

    Dana Loesch is a very twisted, disturbed nut job. Cruz, well, he just seems incredibly weak and pathetic.

  21. Starryfish says:

    Watching Ted Cruz is the closest you get to that childhood image of a child repeatedly hitting himself.

    • Juls says:

      This bizarro world nightmare we are living in is so sad and scary. These people are so pathetic. Thank you for bringing a touch of humor, I actually needed that cackle!

    • Kitten says:

      LMAOOOOO. That image is perfection.

    • Parigo says:

      I’m so disgusted that the most prominent politicians exactly my genX age are Cruz and Rubio. Urgh.

  22. Veronica says:

    Does he, like…not realize that Homer’s quote is actually mocking the modern understanding of the second amendment? Homer is an idiot. The whole point is that only an idiot would think that’s a viable argument. *sigh*

    There is something to be said about the sensationalizing of mass murder in this country, but Dana Loesch is a garbage truck of a human being.

    • Juls says:

      I guess the joke is on Cruz. Or he is a joke. Or both. The media sensationalism of mass murder is a real issue, it makes me think of that song “dirty laundry.” But eff Loesch, there is no reason to address it in such a crass and hurtful way. Just garbage spilling out of the face hole.

  23. Natalie S says:

    Cruz went to ivy league schools and wouldn’t be in a study group with people who went to what he considered lesser ivies. Cruz is Rod/Tod and Martin Prince. He wishes he were Mr. Burns.

    • justcrimmles says:

      Does this make Loesch Nelson Muntz? 🤔

    • lucy2 says:

      All of these guys are like that – they all go to high end schools and have high paying jobs, and then sell themselves as regular joes and talk about the “elites” with disdain, even though they are happily that themselves. It’s amazing some people don’t see it.

  24. flebel says:

    This guy just radiates slime. Texans need to wake up and vote this sleeze out in November. Beto O’Rourke is so much better.

  25. Jay says:

    The joke here is that in the show Lisa is almost always right.

    Oh, and she becomes president after Trump.

    • Neelyo says:

      I was just going to say, The Simpsons had President Lisa Simpson cleaning up the huge mess left behind by her immediate predecessor, Trump.

    • Flan says:

      I wonder who our Lisa Simpson, aka a woman of intelligence in the White house, will be.

  26. flebel says:

    Dana Loesch desperately needs an intervention. She is beyond just a disturbed individual.

  27. kimbers says:

    lmao that’s not an insult!!!! that’s a compliment….he totally has a homer mentality.

  28. Jumpingthesnark says:

    Beto Orourke for Texas senate! Early voting for the primary is this week! Texas celebitches, get out and vote. Let’s put Ted Cruz out if a job in November!

  29. Tiffany says:

    I hate the messenger, but Dana is right about the media and white victims and their families.

    Where is the attention for young black leaders out there and their causes before this.

    The racial differences should not be ignored.

    • Esmom says:

      I disagree. The media doesn’t “love” white victims. It’s the GOP who has continually dismissed black victims and black causes, not the media. I think this feels different to the GOP because white kids are among those speaking out and it scares them because they and their parents look like them, unlike those they’ve continually marginalized and dismissed.

      • Tiffany says:

        Ummmm…what media are you watching to think that is true.

      • Kitten says:

        IMO the main stream media doesn’t respond the same way at all.
        If they decide to do their job that day, it’s a brief story soon to be buried under something that is deemed more important. That’s IF they bother covering it at all. It’s awful and it’s why I follow so many left-leaning NON MSM news sites–because they make it a point to focus on the appalling frequency of the murdering of unarmed people of color.

      • isabelle says:

        Nice attempt at trolling to make obvious media racism polite.

    • Kitten says:

      Yeah…I put a post on FB about the mass shootings and as soon as I posted, I could feel the collective side-eye from my friends who are PoC. Parents of black children feel this fear every day: that maybe their child won’t come home from school today.

      I hesitated to post for that reason but I followed through because ultimately, gun violence is a problem that affects every community, regardless of race or economic background. It’s just unfortunate that the collective public response after a young black man is murdered doesn’t match the level of outrage as when white suburban teens die from gun violence.

      It’s a problem for sure but the absolute WORST messenger is an NRA representative because they literally care nothing for any human life, whether black, white or brown. We must unite against them but we NEED to do better in terms of advocating for people of color who live in fear of getting gunned down by the very people who are hired to protect their communities.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        Well said.

        I’ve seen fb posts where people point out what it would mean to students of color if we had armed teachers. We’ve already seen security guards flipping students over in their chairs etc., how would that escalate with a gun in the mix?

        They also point out that Philando Castile was a school employee with a legal weapon, but he was treated as if he was automatically a criminal and killed because of it. If we have teachers of color pulling out weapons in the middle of an attack, will responding officers recognize them as “the good guys”?

    • Elkie says:

      Well the Charleston Church shooting victims were black and the perpetrator was white and the media was all over that, so she’s not entirely correct…

      But it works both ways. Remember Philando Castile? A man shot dead because a cop felt threatened by the legally-owned firearm in his car that he openly admitted to possessing.

      Had he been white the NRA would have been screaming at the injustice and calling him a martyr to the Second Amendment; as it was, crickets.

      • Tiffany says:

        A Congressman, who happened to be African American, was murdered in that massacre and had a sitting President speak at his funeral. That was something that is the media could not ignore. If the Charleston Nine were just civilians, then, no there would not have been the coverage, while for a week, that we saw. The media only went to them because they were expecting a somber story of how the families had forgiven the terrorist who murdered their family members. If those families were angry, and rightly so, and looking for laws to change, there is NO WAY they would have gotten coverage. At all.

      • Alarmjaguar says:

        Let’s also remember that he was a school employee WHO WAS SHOT FOR LEGALLY CARRYING and that actual people are currently advocating arming teachers (and we seem to be having a national debate about this insane idea!).

    • magnoliarose says:

      No, they shouldn’t, but victims should not be pitted against each other. This violence is all connected, and the NRA is responsible for stoking white fear of color to make more money for gun manufacturers.
      The difference this time is that the young people are speaking up and refusing to be ignored.
      She gets no credit. She is desperate. Somebody has to pay for her cache of botox in her face, so she has to keep her cushy gig pimping guns to children. Dead children keep her living large. She’s just mad they weren’t dead latinos or black children so she could have ginned up some THOSE PEOPLE sentiments.
      But don’t worry some scumbag made sure to add some bigotry into the mix because the school was heavily Jewish, and so were the victims and their families. They always find a way. A person was upset because someone pointed out putting crosses out for Jewish people was wrong and that the assumption that everyone is Christian is wrong. Could have been atheists, Hindus, Buddhists, Zoroastrian, Muslim or Wiccan. The person answering went right to the bigotry to make an excuse and had to add some comments about money too. Because of course.

      All they have now is to make the victims lesser to support owning an assault rifle. Shameful.

  30. Anare says:

    “I think the Democrats are the party of Lisa Simpson,”

    Oooo what an insult Ted. I think Republicans are the party of Donald Trump. Ah ha ha…oh wait, they really are…😂😂😂😂😂😂

  31. Svea says:

    Lisa is the bomb.

  32. Sushiroll says:

    I read this in the voice of Kevin from The Office. 😂😂😂

  33. mimismom says:

    This is not an insult Ted! Lisa is a talented musician and she is sassy as all get out. She was also a hall monitor. Lisa Simpson 2020! #voteforlisa #imwithlisa #lisa2020

  34. Harryg says:

    I loathe him SO MUCH.

  35. Angela82 says:

    Ok I am sorry. I am all for those who like to hunt deer and boar b/c they are tasty and overpopulated. But tell me the last time someone ate a f*cking delicious severely endangered elephant or rhino. The people who hunt them are psychopaths who want a trophy and are one step away from being a serial killer IMO. Never mind the excuses for having an AR 15. There isn;t one. The Republicans are so full of sh*t. Ted Cruz can go f*ck himself.

  36. Ashby says:

    So where is your semi now senator TED CRUZ when we have the delusional tyrant, unhinged, racist, bigoted moron spreading intolerance, anger, hate and deep divisions in the highest office in the land who lacks any integrity, honesty, empathy, common sense, basic intelligence and decency???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
    As the Moron in Chief is trying to destroy the essence of America, you and your gun toting idiots are cheering on the Orange Dictator.

  37. Gisele says:

    Ted Cruz needs to go away. No one wants to look at him (because he looks like a ventriloquist’s dummy). No one wants to listen to anything he is saying. He has nothing to offer the republican party and nothing to offer to our country.

  38. Lary says:

    In the Lisa as president episode, Lisa become president AFTER Trump (and his administration that blows up the budget)…so I guess #LisaSimpsonforPrez????

  39. Dr. Mrs. The Monarch says:

    The depth of anti-intellectualism is quite appalling, but it is the only way Cruz can get elected.

    I love how his “family values” include watching p0rn, supporting sexual harassers and suggesting that families be divided along political lines. I’m increasingly convinced that he crawled out of the upside down. Either that or he is a product of devolution.

    To quote Addams Family Values “You shouldn’t be married. You should be studied!”

  40. Chottz says:

    Ted Cruz is such a moron.

    The Simpsons is created by Matt Groening who is a liberal. I think the point of Lisa Simpson is to throw shade at her ignorant family because they represent most of the dummies here in America with their views and values. She is the voice of reason who continues to get steamrolled by them even though she is much smarter and seems to be more educated than them.

    Another reason Cruz is dumb is because Ronald Reagan, the conservative messiah among Republicans, repeatedly liked to talk shit about the Simpsons and how awful they were and talked about them like they were a real family and how they were the decline of the moral fabric of society. And now here is Ted Cruz, also talking like they are real but praising them because of how stupid they are.

    Conservatives can’t keep their shitty narratives straight.

  41. Sandy Eggo says:

    Reminder to CBers in Texas: Ted Cruz is up for re-election this year. Have a look at Democrat Beto O’Rourke who does not take one dime from PACs and still outraised Cruz last quarter. Early voting for the primaries is going on right now. Primary election day is March 6.

    Gallop (I think it was) recently said Texas is now a contested state and no longer solidly red. Blue wave, baby!!

  42. Pandy says:

    So what does that make the republicans? Beavis and Butthead?

    • whatWHAT? says:

      I’m thinking more like Bill Lumberg from the Milton cartoons / Office Space. self-important despotic and not as smart as he thinks he is.

      or, Dale Gribble from King of the Hill. stupid, paranoid MRA gun-nuts.

  43. mela says:

    As the American Women fight for the equal rights of marginalized social groups, the Children of America are going to be the ones to bring about change for gun control. I love Obama’s tweet, we are proud of you and we have been waiting for you.

    Many of our elected officials seem to be in bed with the NRA. What we are seeing is the extreme effects of many many bad men (including our president) being elected into government- and we can see democracy, our society and human rights crumble and suffer as a result. Women and young people must go out and vote the good men and women into government.

    I also believe from the bottom of my heart that we need more women in government.

    Question: Who is funding the NRA? Russians? Just a conspiracy theory..

    • jwoolman says:

      Mela- my bet is that Mueller is looking at where the NRA got the money it used to quadruple its political contributions while its membership is down. They apparently now have at least one rich member in Russia. I don’t know any more than that about the NRA in Russia, but one would be enough.

      The easiest way to funnel illegal foreign funds to American political campaigns is through American citizens and organizations. The foreign source gives money to the eligible US donor, and that donor passes it along as a donation to the campaign. So it actually is possible that the NRA has acted as a conduit for such activity, receiving donations from foreign sources and then making donations to American campaigns. Apparently they don’t have to disclose their donors.

      I would also like to see someone compare the timing of amounts of NRA donations and swivels on supporting Trump. Quite a few top Republicans refused to endorse or support him, until suddenly they did, even though polls were saying that Trump would lose. What did they know and when did they know it? Or was it in return for NRA money? Why did McConnell threaten Obama with accusations of trying to sway the election if Obama told us about the extent of Russian interference before the election?

  44. Pix says:

    Praying that this guy loses his re-election bid. He is disgusting.

  45. Lorelai says:

    This man is too stupid to live.

    • isabelle says:

      He isn’t stupid, he is highly educated. He an awful person that is manipulating his dumb downed cutting their nose off to spite their face base, to vote for him a rich, privileged ivory tower educated man.

      • Esmom says:

        Yes, exactly. You could say the same about Wayne LaPierre, fear mongering about “the elite” and dig whistling his way through a speech while he takes home a $5 million dollar salary from the NRA.

  46. frigga says:

    Wow. The worst part is they will take this as a compliment (the republicans compared to Homer….). So very telling.

  47. isabelle says:

    Remember and this needs to be tweeted to him, he is a highly educated graduate of prestige Universities. Anyone voting for these hypocrites needs to be slapped on the hand. This big head graduated from Harvard for f””” sake. HARVARD and yet he wants the “uneducated & deplorable” to vote for him so he pretends to be something he isn’t IRL. Anyone voting for any Republicans is sticking their head in the sand and 100% lying to themselves and those around them.

    • Lindy says:

      I wish it were Harvard, but alas, he graduated from Princeton. (He’s definitely a member of the elite who cynically uses racist dog whistling and faux religious sexism to get the plebs frothing at the mouth). At least Princeton also gets to claim Michelle Obama…

  48. JRenee says:

    Rafael Cruz continues to show us who he really is. Until it becomes illegal to accept ANY large amounts of money from these groups, the country will continue to be for sell.
    Extremely scary..

  49. Preeti Kamat says:

    And the GOP is the party of Donald Trump. Wanna guess which is worse, Mr. Cruz?

  50. Close to a nervous breakdown, says:

    I think we are collectivelly delving lower and lower and lower. My only hope is that at the end of the year we will discover that we were watching Trump’s reality show showcasing how fragile democracy is, how easy it is to tear everything down, like a true social critique. (I know that is like wishing on a miracle but a girl can dream, right?)

  51. greenmonster says:

    Insert here a video of one of the cutest moments in The Simpson’s history: Lisa saying goodbye to her substitute teacher Mr. Bergstrom and him handing her a note that she is supposed to read whenever she feels alone and there is no-one she can rely on. The note says ‘You are Lisa Simpson’.

  52. Ally says:

    I guess Ted can’t conceive of anything more horrifying than a smart girl.

    Funny that he identifies with Bart and Homer but not the ethical Christian in town, Ned Flanders. They really are all embracing being the dumb troll party.

  53. Leviathan says:

    I just watched the press conference between Malcolm Turnbull and Trump.

    Turnbull has already started saying “Believe me.” He’ll be saying “It’s a big problem” by the time this trip is over. (SAD)

  54. IMUCU says:

    I love Lisa Simpson, she was always a character I could relate too because I was/am the Lisa Simpson in my family. Even after I met my husband and he met my family, he, out of the blue, said I reminded him of Lisa Simpson when compared to the rest of them and didn’t realize how much he liked Lisa Simpson until then! I am not nearly as musically gifted though and I’ve never gotten peer pressured into smoking cigarettes. 😉 There are other story lines that have happened with Lisa that I’ve watched and said “Ohmigosh, that happened with me too!” But I’m not even going to go into any of that. 😉 So I will proudly be part of the party of Lisa Simpson!

  55. IMUCU says:

    Whoops! Double post! delete.exe

  56. Doh! You ought to know Homer.

  57. WendyNerd says:

    Tbh, I was rather stunned by such a compliment. Lisa is the best.

  58. Lady Medusa says:

    They could at least get their sources correct. Homer didn’t say that — Krusty did. And Krusty’s point was that the 2nd Amendment’s intent when it was written was very different from what the NRA and similar entities interpret it to mean.

    So not only did these geniuses fail to attribute the quote to the right cartoon character, but they also completely missed the point of the quote. Way to go, guys.

  59. Neil says:

    More like Krusty the clown is the Republicans, Millhouse the Democrats and Lisa Simpson a TRUE progressive.