“Gwyneth Paltrow won’t stop referring to her ex-husband as her ‘brother'” links

Happy birthday my brother. Thank you for giving me these two. 💖

A post shared by Gwyneth Paltrow (@gwynethpaltrow) on

Gwyneth Paltrow won’t stop calling Chris Martin (her ex-husband, ex-lover and baby-daddy) her “brother.” Goop is so gross. [Dlisted]
Buzzfeed did a special investigative-reporting piece about NYPD brutality and lies. This article is profoundly disturbing, and yet not shocking in the least. [Buzzfeed]
Tom Ford is bringing back animal prints in a big way. [Go Fug Yourself]
This is why I love Greta Gerwig’s audacity (but not her dress). [LaineyGossip]
Red Sparrow didn’t bomb but it wasn’t a huge opening either. [Pajiba]
Here are some photos from the pre-Oscar parties. [Wonderwall]
Robin Wright is the president now. [Looper]
Abbie Lee Miller won’t be released from jail any time soon. [Starcasm]
Lisa Vanderpump is a powerful ally, I think. [Reality Tea]
There should be no statutes of limitations on rape. Period. The end. [Jezebel]

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52 Responses to ““Gwyneth Paltrow won’t stop referring to her ex-husband as her ‘brother'” links”

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  1. HH says:

    So she just thanked her “brother” for giving her children…WHY? How did that not register as entirely odd to her? The cognitive dissonance is strong with this one.

    • greys says:

      Beside being a gross thing to say, it really is just a silly thing to say. They were in love, they were married, they had sex and reproduced. A divorce does not turn your spouse into your brother. Sometimes she tries so hard to be so evolved, so enlightened, so intellectually and emotionally superior that she just sounds stupid. She is a caricature at this point. She represents so much of what drives me nuts about ridiculous celebrities.

      • HH says:

        “Sometimes she tries so hard to be so evolved, so enlightened, so intellectually and emotionally superior that she just sounds stupid.”

        THIS. I think she’s trying so hard to show that they are doing divorce right and that she’s not just the “ex-wife” and it’s coming off absolutely idiotic.

      • TwoPac says:

        Well I caption my x in photos as either Satan or Svengali, oft both. I’ll see your “woke” and raise you one Chola.

      • Tilly says:

        She’s a tool.

    • Mmg says:

      I really think it’s an intentional burn. She’s trying to emasculate him.
      @Letitgo’s comment on the last post about her habit of referring to him as brother says it all I think:


      1)Regarding Goop’s passive aggressive over-emphasizing of her supposed close relationship with Martin, it’s strategic and is done to be off-putting to any prospective NEW younger famous love interests of Chris Martin. This is a guy who in the 2-3 years since they’ve split has dated Jennifer Lawrence Oscar winning IT girl on steroids and
      is now dating another hot IT girl, Miss 50 Shades, Hollywood royalty Dakota Johnson. Both are in their twenties with fire careers.

      The very fact that Martin seems to be trying to one up Goopyth herself (because of all the women in the world, even in his own industry of music) – why keep going for actresses with hot careers?

      Frankly it’s like theyre both being passive aggressive. Chris keeps having high profile relationships with hot young actresses with careers Goop would’ve killed for, while Goop emasculates him by saying he’s like her bro (aka her way of saying she cares not one whit who he fcks) but makes sure to remind his hot young actress love interests that she herself is still famous and he’s a daddy of young kids who has responsibilities (in the hopes they’ll eventually get tired of his being a Daddy who’s forever connected to Goop and even more tired of how much press she still gets for talking about their relationship and other dumb ish).
      It worked with J-Law, as she split.”

      – that said, I don’t think JLaw dumped him because of this.

      • greys says:

        That is a good take on the situation… in any case, she is EXHAUSTING

      • Jayna says:

        How do you know J-Law dumped him? It could be the other way. J-Law would get on my last nerve if I was a guy close to 40, with her party girl, over-the-top antics. I could see where as time wore on, the infatuation with her wore off.

      • Mila says:

        I don’t know you guys. I don’t have kids and have never been married but this is pretty much how I feel about my first boyfriend. He gave me a second family as in I’m still insanely close to his mother and friendly with his grandma, father, his friends…Despite not even living in the same country as them. Granted it’s been many years since we broke up, but because I have remained part of his family, it kinda feels like he’s my brother more than anything else.

      • Olive says:

        I didn’t see this comment before, but I said the same thing below about this being Gwyneth’s way of still being closer to him than any young pretty thing can get.

      • Danielle says:

        Interesting take!

      • derpshooter says:

        Honestly, yes. I think goop is just a leveled-up
        Lena Dunham, she’s more savvy and sophisticated about getting on people’s nerves and being fake.

  2. Zapp Brannigan says:

    Why not simply say “Happy birthday to a great friend who gifted me two wonderful children”
    But I suppose then we would not be talking about her. Either that or she thinks she is Cersei Lannister.

    • Rachel in August says:

      I think she means as another human being in general … I think. Oddly put though, yes.

    • jwoolman says:

      Don’t know why people are bent out of shape about this. I imagine her thinking is that they aren’t lovers any more, but are still family because of the kids. Harmless.

  3. minx says:

    She’s so weird.

  4. SK says:

    I have never been able to understand why the hell there is a statute of limitations on sexual crimes. Children who are sexually abused usually don’t come forward until they are adults. Adult victims of sexual assault often take years to process what happened to them and come forward. This is a proven fact and yet you have limits!! I just don’t get it. In Australia we do not have this and several people (including celebrities) have been found guilty of historical charges.

  5. Loopy says:

    Does he mot mind being called that?i find it really insulting like she is trying to down play their romance. Well he must start calling her is mother or aunt and see how she likes that.

  6. Ruyana says:

    To me her initials – G. and P. have come to stand for *gag* and *puke*. She really does disgust me on so many levels and I’m amazed that she continues to get coverage of any kind.

  7. Darla says:

    Goop is a strange one for sure.

    I hate animal prints and not even Tom Ford will change that.

  8. atorontogal says:

    @Greys —-YAAAS!

  9. Carmen says:

    CB please do a thread on the after-parties. It looked like all the real action and all the best dresses were at the Vanity Fair after-party. The Oscar red carpet was dull for the most part.

    • Parigo says:

      Yes, please! I was confused though…I thought changing for the afte4 parties was to slip into something less formal. A lot of the ladies wore something just as formal and many of the dresses were better than their red carpet choice (like Emily Blunt’s).

  10. Ada says:

    I really don’t get why calling CM her brother bothers so many of you? I mean, vaginal steaming advice I very much understand being upsetting – it might have harmful effects on women’s bodies and she is making money off of that. But this has no negative consequences for anyone as far as I can see? Anecdotally, I was with my ex-partner for ten years and during the last two years I only loved him as a brother and felt nauseous at the prospect of having sex with him (someone once told me that if you live in close proximity with someone, even if you’re not related, the incest taboo might kick in – maybe it’s true). We are now long broken-up and with other people, but we are still best-friend close. But friend sometimes doesn’t do full justice to the kind of closeness we have, and because we have long ceased to see each other in a sexual light brother/sister works fine (though obvs not as an official moniker). Goop is so smug and annoying but I can’t get mad about this.

    • minx says:

      I don’t think anyone is seriously mad or upset by this, it’s just peculiar. They’re not siblings, she had sex and children with this man. There’s an overlay of eeew to that terminology. And it sounds like she is neutering and downplaying their whole marriage, simply to sound cool and modern.

      • Ada says:

        I dunno. People above are reading a lot into her use of the word, calling it gross and a way of sabotaging Chris Martin’s relationships. Also language is flexible and can have multiple meanings: brother/sister have historically been used to imply kinships beyond the strictly biological. It’s fairly common. Anyways, not sure why I am on my lunch break defending GP! 🙂

      • Jayna says:

        @Minx, you hit the nail on the head.

      • HH says:

        @Ada – “Also language is flexible and can have multiple meanings: brother/sister have historically been used to imply kinships beyond the strictly biological. It’s fairly common.”

        Yes, in terms of close friendships and bonds that are not–nor were ever–sexual or romantic in nature. At least in terms of common/wide use. You’re original post implies that you understand the odd nature of using it for someone that you have previously had a romantic/sexual relationship with (e.g “though obvs not as an official moniker”). As Minx pointed out, I don’t think anyone is beside themselves about her using it, but it’s odd. Coupled with the fact that she insists one telling the world about her new/different relationship with him, it comes off as both weird and smug.

      • Ada says:

        @HH I meant that I would not put him as my brother on my family tree or such, i.e. in a capacity where someone might actively be led to believe that we were related. I don’t think we are likely to make that mistake with Gwyneth and Chris? Just because you used to have sex with someone does not mean that you are forever barred from defining your relationship with them anew in ways that suit you.

    • Luna says:

      I call people “brother,” it’s kind of a colloquialism, I guess, I call my younger sons “little brother.” I call some of my male patients “brother.” I see zero wrong with it. It’s just what she calls him.

  11. tw says:

    She tries so hard to appear evolved when really she’s just another middle-aged white woman obsessing over staying thin and relevant. Whatever GOOP.

  12. marianne says:

    I think shes meaning to use it in a friendly term. Often how people in the black community will refer to their friends as “My brother” or “My sister”. But it is odd considering this is her ex husband….and also that shes pretty vanilla.

    • Esmom says:

      That’s how I took it, almost interchangeable with “dude.” Just a bland term of endearment, not incestuous or whatever icky connotations people are picking up.

  13. Jayna says:

    Okay. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt about the brother comment a while back. This is just beyond silly her continual need to refer to him in that way. It’s like third time. This time she’s calling him her brother directly.

    • Olive says:

      to me it feels like she is just claiming a different type of ownership over him. “Ex husband” is not a close term, but “brother” gives her a “deeper” connection to him. I don’t know if she’s jealous at all over Chris dating Dakota Johnson but that’s the vibe I get from her “brother” comments.

    • KBB says:

      I agree with those who said it was a way of neutering him, but I also think she realized that she could get headlines by calling him that so she has continued to do so.

  14. Shannon says:

    It’s kind of reaching to find this sooo problematic. I think of my ex-husband as a sort of brother. Yes, we share a child and we also kind of grew up together. He’s a male that I don’t have any desire anymore to have sex with (LOL we’ve been divorced since before Gwyneth & Chris got married) but we’re still friends, I still visit his family, our lives are kind of tied together in that way. If they were still married, it’d be weird. But I think almost every amicably divorced couple could say the same. They’re no longer romantically attached but they’re family.

  15. Peanutbuttr says:

    I believe Anne of Cleves was referred to as the King’s Sister, after she agreed to an annulment.

  16. Olive says:

    all this oscars coverage is burning me out. Can’t we talk about the photos Kylie posted of her baby’s face?

    • KBB says:

      Lol I don’t know if this is a joke but I could not disagree more. We finally have A-listers to talk about and you want to go back to discussing d-listers and their attempts at grabbing headlines?!

  17. Ozogirl says:

    I’m glad she has a good relationship with her ex, but why call him her brother? So weird. Just say he’s like family or is a good father to their kids.

  18. Jussie says:

    I don’t think it’s weird. I’ve broken up with people because it turned into more of a brother-sister relationship, and I’ve heard countless people say the same.

    I think of my first boyfriend as my brother. He’s 100% family.

  19. electra says:

    She could say it once.

  20. Blonde555 says:

    She’s trying too hard to be cool. What a fool.

  21. Layla Love says:

    Weird people. Weirder times.

  22. Dee says:

    Claire Underwood is POTUS!

  23. Mar says:

    Sorry but it’s totally creepy to call the man you have kids with your brother. There are better terms of endearment to use…..

  24. Patty says:

    Yeah. Why not just use his name, as in: “Happy Birthday Chris”. He’s her ex, she calls him brother to get attention. It’s all so transparent.

  25. Lucy2 says:

    “Happy birthday my friend “ would be so much less weird.
    But then no one would be talking about her.

  26. BJ says:

    I don’t really have a problem with her calling Chris,her brother.
    I do have a problem with my cousin calling her ex husband,Satan, but that’s a story for another day.