Marie Claire’s May issue is devoted to their “Fresh Faces,” which include some women who have been around and been famous for years, like Riley Keough and Sophie Turner. I mean, Sophie Turner is very young, but she’s been famous because of Game of Thrones for years now. Still, Sophie is “fresh.” Especially because she’s lining up film projects right and left and quietly building a career beyond Sansa Stark. Sophie is also engaged to Joe Jonas, although the last time I heard, they weren’t really making wedding plans and I don’t think they’ve even come close to setting the date. It’s my hope – and I know I’m being mean – that this fizzles out before they ever walk down the aisle. It sounds like Sophie isn’t too convinced that marrying Joe will be the greatest thing ever as well:
How the Times Up movement has comforted her: “I’m so much more comfortable going into work knowing that there’s a group of people who will believe me if something does happen.”
Her engagement to Joe Jonas: “I’m still like, Holy sh*t! I’m engaged. There’s this weird misconception that being married is the greatest thing that’ll ever happen to you. But I’ve always found that my career is something I work for, and when I achieve something, there’s a sense that this is the greatest thing I’ll do in my life. It’s lovely to be engaged. Not like I achieved anything, but I found my person, like I’d find a house that I love and want to stay in forever. There’s a sense of peace that comes with finding your person. But there’s a drive that comes with your career.”
I appreciate what she says about her career being her real achievement in life. If I was a lot younger and I looked up to Sophie as a role model, I would appreciate the fact that she said this. It sometimes feels like there’s this real throwback with younger celebrity women – and older celebrity women, to be honest – that they talk about marriage and love like it will be their greatest achievement ever, to be someone’s wife. It just feels very 1950s to me, and I’m glad Sophie is shutting it down.
Check out their little dog, Porky Basquiat. OMG, this dog is so cute.
Cover courtesy of Marie Claire, additional photo courtesy of Backgrid.
I’m not really a fan but I do like her take on this. I would not come close to calling marriage an “achievement” until you’ve been married at least 20 years, even then its only a very personal achievement. For people who don’t believe in marriage it would still be, *shrug* good for you I guess.
It goes to the same reason I get annoyed with mommy bloggers and entrepreneurs whose oldest kids are like, 7. Come back when your kid is a fully functioning and content thirty year old, then I’m interested. Until then, the jury’s out! 🤷♀️
THIS!
Like, marriage and raising kids is WORK, but there’s also a wide variety of standards for success and processes. I want my kid to be financially stable, successful, driven, and a good person who knows how to be happy and content and takes personal responsibility for the things in his life, and how to bring others along for the ride.* Other people may have different markers for success. My husband and I appear to bicker constantly, but we adore each other and almost never actually have a fight where we’re mad at each other. We’re just two people with strong opinions and emotions who vocalize them regularly. Someone else might not think that’s a successful marriage. However, at work, there’s clear markers for success and I derive a good portion of my self-worth from hitting those markers.
* I’m raising a financially privileged, extremely bright white boy, so the lessons HAVE to acknowledge the responsibility that should come with that, but so often doesn’t.
Their dog is creeping me out.
Ha!
The part-husky mixes with those blue eyes give great stare-downs.
I am just gonna say that Porky Basquiat is a PHENOMENAL dog name.
Holy Shit I’m engaged. Her career over her marriage. Okay, Sansa, what a lucky girl you have your career and Joe Jonas! He’s dreamy…..lol
I don’t think there is anything 1950s about thinking being a wife is your greatest role. Just like I don’t think it’s 1950s that Hugh Jackman thinks his wife and kids are the most important thing to him, and the best thing to ever happen to him. People matter more than paychecks at the end of the day.
I don’t think it’s 1950’s per se, but there is something odd to me when people place so much emphasis on – like she said – having met the right person. A marriage is something else altogether; that takes work, but before then, no it’s not much of an achievement.
Something wrong, no.
Something depressing, yes.
I would be intensely depressed if my greatest achievement was being married, it would mean I never had anything else going on?
And I say this as a married woman…
Totally agreeing with Sophie here.
….Silver Unicorn your comment puts it well. Of course its something wonderful and to be proud of but…….It seems triggering to some who fear it represents “Married as a means of financial and social security”. She has a career and is proud of it. Some don’t have careers though….and thats totally cool too. And her hubby probably doesn’t love her comment lol. But I do get the sentiment once it is extrapolated beyond a baity headline.
I agree with Lucy. My husband and my soon-to-be born daughter trump any career. I put my writing career on hold when I got married, because it would require too much time on the road away from him, especially since he wanted me to join him on his business travels. It doesn’t mean nothing else is important going on in my life, it’s just those things PALE in comparison to our relationship. Being married to each other is the greatest thing we’ve ever done, because nothing can be as meaningful as our commitment. Before I met my husband, I would have definitely said my career was my biggest achievement, but not anymore. Being the best partner for my husband is something much more important. A year go, before we got engaged, he passed on a major career opportunity that would have provided him with the most opulent financial security all because it would have taken him to a place where I’d be unable to travel to and visit. He didn’t want to put our life on hold even for a year or so. We wouldn’t be where we are today if he hadn’t picked me over greater career achievements.
For me, career successful was much easier to find than great love. Now that I have it, no professional achievement comes close to it.
It’s ok if you think either is the best thing or achievement in your life. But this is a question rarely asked of men lol.
Yeah, I think I’m closer to this take. Doesn’t have to/shouldn’t be either/or AND it’s OK to want one and not the other, or both.
But I also disagree with the take that focusing on your family—because with or without kids or even legal marriage, your romantic partner is your family–and placing them above your career isn’t something I think is 1950s housewife. Saying, ‘I’ll have to ask my husband if I can do that,’ is 1950s housewife. Saying I value my marriage more than my career, or job— because many people just have a job, not a career, and that’s OK, too—is just being committed to the marriage. Which, again, it’s also totally fine if you don’t want to be married.
I’d also guess that this particular actress saying this is probably a lot more along the lines of, ‘I’d rather talk about my work than my paparazzi-friendly relationship, because getting engaged someone famous is not what I want to be known for’ … Which, again, makes a lot of sense.
Really, we all need to do a lot less parsing and judging of each other’s language and comments and just live and let live.
@S, right on.
It’s not asked to men for a reason: they don’t have to be married in order to be considered successful or that they achieved something special.
I get what she’s saying and I agree. Not that marriage and relationships aren’t work, but having a passion to build a career is something she is doing for herself and doesn’t feel guilty about it. I agree that celebrity men never get asked those kinds of things because it’s just assumed they will keep right on working and their partners will adapt to their lives/careers. Good for her.
Awesome, and she is so right!
PORKY BASQUIA????????what the hell of a name is It?and Yes poor dog is creepy!!is It a puppy or a toy bersion of an husky?good lord
I think it’s s Husky Pomeranian mix.
It’s an Alaskan Klee Kai
Considering her marriage likely won’t last a year, I’d say what she says is right on the money.
yup.
I have to agree with her that finding someone to marry isn’t necessarily an achievement. It’s still wonderful and indeed gives you a sense of personal peace, but it isn’t the same as professional achievements.
I would say sustaining a marriage and raising good kids is an achievement to be proud of, but again, that’s very personal. It’s not the same as the achievements you share with the world, like your career.
I’m happy for these two. They’re a cute couple.
eh, what a lot of PR babble. Come out already Sophie!
What? Why do you think she is in the closet?
@SUNNY she use to be more free on her Instagram account and as she got older she sanitized it.
Some people choose their careers over thier marriages just don’t really say it or don’t see it that way. I agree with her, her career is her labour of love. I think too many women have been consumed with making thier marriage a priority. Men just don’t view it the same way. They value their careers. The husband gets a better paying job in another city, mostly the family will move. Wife has the same opportunity you have to have several discussions on is it really worth uprooting the family. There are exceptions.
She is absolutely right. Getting married isn’t a life achievement. So many women treat getting married as if it’s a validation if their entire lives, which is just sad. And I agree with you Kaiser – I hope they don’t make it down the aisle. Sophie is still SO young and she doesn’t know who she is yet. She needs to live a little more and find out who she is.
Hope she finds jobs after GoT. She seems to have her eggs in one basket. I don’t know the actress, but Sansa is a one note kind of a girl. Always has the same facial expression. Plus come on, Joe Jonas, for real. Did he take off his chastity ring?
She was in all of those newer XMen movies, so she definitely has done stuff other than GoT. They’re not terribly demanding from an emoting perspective, though.
this site is starting to really take the piss out of things lol
Her ideas on marriage is really cool… but if we’re being feminist then a woman can say i really worked hard on myself to be open to love and feel really accomplished in having a healthy relationship and that growing into marriage. NOTHING wrong with that yal…
i think her statement is more just hollywood… i mean in her industry you kinda gotta almost be fine with the cheating and open marriage and side pieces that happens 9 to 1 scenarios so she probably wouldnt feel all that accomplished of being married or engaged its more like i hope this works…
but when i get marriage i would feel like its an accomplishment like i worked hard on myself to really emotionally stabilize and take my time and not settle or be bitter and when i did meet my fiance, there was no pressure but learning and working to be more open and patient…. why is that phrasing so bad to you all lol sheesh.
Lololol. I don’t have an opinion on which is more of an achievement, but I can tell you which is more fun / less work / involves less eye rolling and less temptation to cut a dude.
I certainly wouldn’t compare finding my husband to finding a house I really liked?! 😂
Tell me I’m not the only one?!
I got to look at my house twice for 30-45 minutes before I bought it.
Made it sound like a partner is just another material possession.
Hmmm. I’m on the fence by what she says. While I agree that a marriage is work and that after years and years of it, it IS, of course, an achievement. You’ve made it and so many more around you have not. That IS an achievement. Also have an amazing career that is fulfilling and that you love that stands the test of time is also an achievement. I think she is far too young to know what her greatest achievement may be. It may end up being motherhood, it may end up being saving tigers from extinction, who knows when they are that young. But there are several things in our lives that we can look to be proud of what we’ve achieved.
This, of course, is not putting any of the 50’s housewife BS into the comment, I’m not even going there!
Nothing about her comment bothers me because it’s clear she’s talking about herself. She’s not going out of her way to impose her value system on other people — she’s simply saying what feels right for her.
I do also think some people luck out in finding the right person, and I think in a way she’s acknowledging that. Yes, hard work goes into maintaining a relationship, but in the end I think it’s easier to do that hard work if you’re lucky enough to find that right person for you. Some people are lucky to find that; others, not so much. I think it’s too unpredictable to say why some people find the right partner and others don’t. Sure, some people might sabotage their relationships, but I also think some people just don’t find the right person either (at least not as early as she did anyway). Marriage is a collaboration, and to find the right person to collaborate with does seem up to destiny favouring you to some degree, imo. I don’t think you can make the life-long collaboration work, no matter how determined you might be, if the other person isn’t right for you or isn’t willing to do the work with you. It takes two people to make the “achievement” happen over the long-term.
All I can say is good for her because this marriage doesn’t seem like it’s gonna work out well for either of me but hey! Yea totes you’re in love and found your “one” at 22. Btw I’m married and got engaged when I was 32. My marriage doesn’t define me as I truly believe my husband adds to my life and does not complete it
and your marriage can STILL be seen as accomplishment and your husband compliment (NOT) supplement your life.
Good for her. I also don’t think they’ll ever make it down the aisle. And if she’s got a lot lined up work wise, it will be even tougher to sustain their relationship with the distances and all. That said, I don’t Joe is a bad guy and I’m happy he’s had success with his new band.
I mean she’s pretty young. Her greatest achievement might not be career or marriage. Who knows where life will take her?
My marriage and family isn’t an achievement. It’s just something awesome I can sink into at the end of a long day.
Yes, definitely.
I agree with her about the career thing and all that jazz about marriage not necessarily being an accomplishment but finding your perfect person is like finding your perfect house?- wtf. No bueno.
Of course like anything, what she said is subjective for everyone. But I didn’t take the house/partner thing as something literal, where she was comparing finding a life partner with an actual piece of property. To me, it sounded like she was saying she found someone who felt like home to her…..like the place she’d always imagined/fantasized finding, the place that just makes her feel safe and happy. No negative connotation or comparing people to possessions at all, just that she’d found her home in JJ.
And on the subject of all the speculation about if her relationship with JJ will last or not, I say there are no guarantees relationships will work out no matter HOW old or experienced you are. People split up every day that waited until their 30’s or 40’s to settle down. Just like there are people who remain happily married after having wed in their late teens/early 20’s. IF they break up either before or after they wed, they won’t be the first and they sure as hell won’t be the last. All you can do is wish someone well and if they are your friend you support them when/if it falls apart. OR celebrate their happiness when it lasts.
I think it’s too early to say, especially in such a fickle industry. She could stop getting roles tomorrow.
My career has taken a hit and it’s been very depressing. It wasn’t even the most important thing in my life. I wasn’t planning on moving up or achieving anything major; just helping people. My husband has been there to help me through it all.
Then again, he could break my heart tomorrow.
So I guess I’m just trying to say that life can throw you some curveballs and not end up the way you expect.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with “just” being someone’s wife. I don’t think it should be expected of women, but I don’t look down on those that are fulfilled by one role.
My career has made me very happy and proud, but it has never made me feel the way my husband or kids have.