Meghan Markle is going to need to follow arcane royal protocol for the rest of her life

The British Royal family arrive at Sandringham to celebrate Christmas Day

Just days before her wedding, it was said that then-Lady Diana Spencer had a bad case of cold feet, and she was openly discussing the possibility of canceling the wedding. She was told, in no uncertain terms, that her face was already on the tea towels so it was a bit late for all of that. One wonders if Meghan Markle will have a similar moment just before her wedding day. While I don’t doubt that Meghan and Harry are deeply in love with each other, the sheer magnitude of what Meghan is doing has been slowly creeping up on her for months now. Oh, right: she’s not just marrying a handsome ginger prince, she’s joining The Firm, and The Firm has a lot of rules and her life is never going to be the same and the British tabloids are probably always going to attack her. So, with that in mind, Reuters did a lengthy story about how Meghan is going to learn a sh-tload of protocol, which she will have to follow for THE REST OF HER LIFE. You can read the full piece here. Some highlights:

She has to learn all of this really fast: “The problem is that she’s got to remember that, as a member of the royal family, she represents the family or, as it’s been called, ‘the brand’,” said Grant Harrold, who served as a butler to Harry himself while working for his father Prince Charles, and now provides expert guidance on the subject. “So, I think there is quite a lot pressure to make sure she gets it right because the last thing she wants to do is do something wrong or make a mistake and it ends up becoming front page news – and then it’s embarrassing for her and for the royal family.”

The endless flummery: “I think Meghan will cope – but she will find some of the flummery difficult to bear,” said Andrew Morton. “This was a girl who was a gender equality advocate for the United Nations – having to bow and curtsy to the queen and even (her future sister-in-law) Kate Middleton in private occasions.”

The protocol is important to royals: “Etiquette and protocol is really important to the royal family. It’s been important to royals for centuries,” Harrold said. “Those rules are there … one – to make them understand what’s expected of them, but also – so they understand what to do and what not to do.” As such, until Markle marries Harry and assumes the style “Her Royal Highness”, she should, strictly speaking, curtsy to all the other royals with such a title, such as Kate, the wife of Harry’s elder brother Prince William…Those who breach the unspoken rules can sometimes expect a frosty reception.

Does the Queen actually care? “The queen doesn’t care actually if people bow or curtsy or not, but I guess if it’s somebody who ought to know, she probably would. But she’s not going to tick people off for not doing it.”

[From Reuters]

Do you think Meghan will care about curtsying to various in-laws? I don’t know. I think what will bother her – and I’m saying this an American – is the “not knowing when to do it” part of it. Like, one second you’re supposed to treat your sister-in-law as a sister, and then suddenly you’re supposed to curtsy and bow and scrape? I would forget. I would constantly forget how to behave, because Americans just aren’t raised to even think about those things. But now she’ll have to think about it… for the rest of her life. She’ll have to remember it. And if she forgets it in public, she’ll be torn apart by the British press and all of the pearl-clutchers. I don’t know, you guys… Meghan might need a few shots of tequila before she walks down the aisle. I might need a few shots just to watch it!

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Britain's Prince Harry and Meghan Markle arrive to attend a reception hosted by Malcolm Turnbull, Prime Minister of Australia, right, and his wife Lucy Turnbull, second right, at Australia House in London celebrating the forthcoming Invictus Games Sydney 2

Photos courtesy of WENN, PCN, Backgrid.

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167 Responses to “Meghan Markle is going to need to follow arcane royal protocol for the rest of her life”

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  1. Clare says:

    I mean…as long as we don’t get topless/pantless shots of her in the first couple of years she will already be doing better than Kate…soo…

    • CL says:

      Seriously — that’s a pretty low bar.
      I think she’ll be fine, partly due to her acting history. Learning these rules will be like learning a script. She’ll have rules for what to say, when to say it, and what movements to use, just like the job she’s been doing.

    • Nancy says:

      Topless pictures of Meghan on a girls trip were leaked in March and a picture of her in a towel wearing the bracelet Harry gave her in the picture.

      • Helen Smith says:

        I didn’t think Nancy was blaming Meghan. I thought she was stating facts. Photos have been leaked. End of. No moralizing.

      • FLORC says:

        Theres also topless photos of kate sunbathing with Carole in her dating/gf days. And no one cares about those because they don’t matter.
        What this points out is once she is married and on official visits she cannot flash with light fabric on windy days descending photogs from above with zero undergarments. That’s not even tempting fate. That’s flat out showing the world.

        So, whatever Meghan has done it doesn’t matter. What she will do once married in and on official work events does matter. It’s that simple.

    • Milla says:

      I’m guessing you are big Kate’s fan. But to be fair, Kate got the heat from the press and it will continue at some point. Just Markle sells more at the moment.

    • Merritt says:

      Attitudes like this are why women continue to be dehumanized for wardrobe malfunctions and leaked pictures. Until people as a whole stop obsessing over them regardless of whether they like the woman or not, society will never move on.

      • FLORC says:

        Eventually, the sacrifice of the spare to raise the heir will happen. MM can work, dress well, never miss a step. And if she has 1 hair out of place or looks too happy on a vacation she will be torn apart for it to raise kate or will. It’s the press. It’s the public. It’s the firm with generations of this tactic.

    • Ollie says:

      The naked body of a woman was put on public display without her consent and you do as if it was her fault?
      No one has the right to do this. The female body is not public property.
      I remember some Italian magazines printed those photos on their covers and made special editions. Disgusting! They used her body as if they have the right to do so. No one asked her, they just used her to make money.
      It speaks volumes that the paps and magazines only got a slap on their hands while Kate the blame, almost zero support and zero say.

      • Muffy says:

        Ollie, thank you. No one is responsible for those photos of Kate topless except the photographer and the publisher.

      • Pozzolana says:


        Either Kate is mocked for being frumpy, dowdy, and dull, or for being prurient and immodest enough to sunbathe topless and wear short skirts. Girl can’t win, and with standards like this, none of us can.

      • Annabelle Bronstein says:

        Thank you Ollie. For a second I thought I had stumbled and fallen into the DM’s comment section.

        @pozzolana there is a theory for this uniquely feminine cultural phenomenon called ‘no unmarked woman.’ It’s fascinating.

      • Pozzolana says:

        Annabelle: I just looked up Tannen’s essay. Thanks for the reference–a fascinating read.

      • Cirque28 says:

        THIS. And another thanks to Annabelle for the No Unmarked Woman rec.

    • Veronica T says:

      That isn’t fair. Kate was papped. Meghan actually sent out a risqué video to someone and it was on the internet – so i think comparing the two is unfair to Kate.

      • Vanessa says:

        How do you know that Megan send out Risqué video to someone ? Megan could have be hacked by someone Megan privacy was violated just as Kate was . No woman should have pictures or videos of them self Display on internet without their consent it’s was wrong for press to that to Kate just its wrong like for the press to do that Megan . Unless you have proved that Megan herself send a Risqué video to someone you just spreading rumors

    • Lahdidahbaby says:

      Those photos were taken without Kate’s knowledge and published without her permission. It was the most despicable invasion of her privacy and her right to decide who sees her naked body. To blame her for that is to become part of the problem.

    • Masamf says:

      IMVHO, ALL pictures/videos etc of someone that get taken/printed or distributed without their consent is tacky and wrong on all levels. I don’t care if “Kate should have known that there would be someone larking somewhere” etc, it doesn’t matter. Kate was in a private place and those pictures were a gross invasion of her privacy. They were tacky and anyone that published them was wrong with a capital W.
      Same goes for Meghan topless video/pictures that were “leaked”. Its very interesting how in one post some are twisting themselves into pretzels over a comment about Kate’s topless pictures and in the same posts are condoning Meghan’s pictures that were taken off of her phone and leaked. You can’t have it both ways folks. Both women privacy was grossly invaded, and condoning any action is tackiness of the highest level. Distribution of said pictures/videos was wrong and shouldn’t be even be up for discussion as any measure for some level of decency.

    • Elaine says:

      Agree @Clare.
      PippaTip #5: Don’t want people to see you without your top on? Don’t go outside topless.

      • JustBitchy says:

        This place is becoming way too pro Keen Kate. In this world if you go topless expect to be papped no matter who you are

      • milky says:

        Ugh, you guys must be such old prudes! If women want to go topless at private properties.. they can! If it’s a topless/nude beach, that’s totally different. But on private property, you shouldn’t be afraid of pervs taking your pics.

        @Seraphina Meghan’s acting roles have already seen her showing her knickers and bum up close. I’d say both Kate and Meghan are the same when it comes to that lol.

    • Seraphina says:

      Exactly this. I’m reading the “pressure” no conform and all I could think of were Kate’s ass and boobs. REALLY???? MM has already shown she’s a cut above Kate.

    • RoyalSparkle says:


  2. Nickname says:

    But…. she’s going to change the British Royal Family!!! She’s going to single handlely modernize it!! She’s going to do such an amazing job that Harry will replace Will as next in line!

    • Lala says:

      Meghan has ALREADY changed and modernized the British Royal Family…she is an African-American woman…and she’s marrying a Prince of England…BOOM!

      • Veronica T says:

        And the woman who talked about Women’s Empowerment gave up her entire life and will follow rules that to americans are absurd and somewhat degrading, like curtsying to another human.
        Personally, no. I would never – but I’ve been a feminist for 40 years so that’s just me.

      • homeslice says:

        The fact that she would not have been “allowed” to marry to heir, and only good enough for the spare speaks volumes. I wouldn’t want in that family, but good luck to her!

      • Honest B says:

        And he’s not even the spare anymore…he’s so far away from that throne.

      • RoyalSparkle says:

        Yes. Potential King Henry (Princess Henry will be WORKING ROYALS – a Force, and MUCH needed change in the Wales heirs/Line!) .

      • Masamf says:

        Oh my goodness Veronica T, does Meghan making decisions for her and Harry’s lives make her any less of a feminist? And what exactly is feminism? Isn’t the definition of feminism that women, just like men, have equal right to do for themselves as they please? Does the right to make decisions for what she does forget relationship with her soon to be husband and soon to be nlawas not apply to Meghan just because? Oh maybe the definition of feminism, according to you, is the right to be judgemental towads other women for making the choices they make for themselves!!!

    • violet says:

      @Nickname – whether she said it or not, the same media said that about Diana and Fergie, too. – if I heard the term “breath of fresh air” I heard it 100 times. Me, if I heard them use the term about me in this situation, I’d already be opening a Swiss bank account, squirreling money away, and making a mental note of the best divorce lawyers in London.

      Modernization is a two-edged blade for today’s monarchies. Too much and it loses its point and its separateness. If she said it, she’s already not understanding the nature of the thing.

  3. MissMarierose says:

    I think she’ll care about having to curtsy to Princess Michael. But otherwise, I doubt it. It’s a millisecond of her time.

    • Merritt says:

      Princess Michael would be the one doing the curtsy. Meghan will outrank her.

    • imqrious2 says:

      Meghan, as a Duchess, will outrank Pushy. I would LOVE to be a fly on the wall the first time Pushy has to curtsey to Meg! Yes, I’m evil that way! lolol

    • Miss Melissa says:

      She should not have to curtsy to Princess Michael. They both married in and her husband outranks Prince Michael, thus Megan outranks Marie Christine.

      • Ellaus says:

        As I understand, as a married in she acquires the rank of her husband when he is present, but if Harry is not there, Meghan will have the rank she has from birth… So she would have, in the absence of Harry to curtsy to Princess Michael if TVE latter is with Prince Michael, por to princesa Eugenie and Bea…

        It is a bit complicated.

      • Merritt says:

        But that is in theory only if she encounters Princess Michael when Prince Michael is also there. It is pretty unlikely. And what would Princess Michael do about it? Complain to the Queen? I imagine the Queen would be unsympathetic to Princess Michael, especially since she doesn’t seem to like her.

      • Ellaus says:

        @Merrit, thats what I said, she has to curtsy to M. Christine if TVE latter has ver husband present, in the (rare) event neither of them had their husbands present both would revert to their birth ranks and I think Marie Christine is an countess by birth, but a foreign one … So i truly don’t know how that would work…
        I suppose that in a ‘harryless’ state she would have to courtsy to more people than with him by her side.

        Sorry for any typos, the goddam phone keeps changing words to Spanish.

      • Merritt says:

        If neither is with their husband, then Princess Michael would be the one to curtsy. I’m not sure Meghan would have to curtsy to her even if Prince Michael was present because Princess Micheal is not a blood princess, and she shouldn’t hold her breath about getting a curtsy from Meghan because it is not going to happen.

    • Umyeah says:

      I think meghan will be higher on the royal heirarchy so that a$$hole will have to curtsey to Meghan, and i love that!!!!!

    • Masamf says:

      Meghan CHOOSES to curtsey to HM or to PoW. Curtseying is a choice one makes, its not an enforced action for one to do. She will CHOOSE to curtsey to Kate or to whomever, or she WON’T CHOOSE to curtsey to any of them.There have been many people that CHOSE to NOT curtsey to HM or to PoW etc, and nothing happened to them. Case in point, the then Australia’s prime minister did not curtsey to TQ on HM’s visit to Australia. I have see videos where people do not curtsey to PoW, hey I seen videos where Americans were introduced to HM and none of them curtsied to her!! People are acting like curtseying to Kate is all Meghan is expected to do!!

      • Ellaus says:

        This is not how it works. As a private citizen she can choose to curtsy or not. That is why you saw those people not curtsying, and reportedly the Queen doesn’t mind that. However once she marries, she no longer is a private citizen, but a member of the Royal Family, more so, she will be a working royal, and all of them have to follow this archaic rules, in public and in private. Because the Queen actually cares about it.
        Meghan already made a choice the moment she said Yes to Harry…. Her new work has its perks, but also many inconviniences.

      • LAK says:

        Masamf: Regardless of whether the public chooses to curtsey or not, within the family itself, they have no choice in the matter. They curtsey to each other the first time they see each other.

        There is a hierarchy of who curtseys to whom which is ridiculous in the extreme, but hey, you want to join the the BRF, them are the rules within the family.

  4. Nanny to the rescue says:

    Eh, she’s a smart woman, she’ll learn. She might mess it up at the beginning a few times, but sooner or later it’ll be in her blood, like any other habit or regular protocol we do.

  5. Merritt says:

    Outside of state visits, they don’t seem to bow or curtsy to anyone but the Queen and Prince Philip. I don’t think I’ve seen the York sisters curtsy to William, Kate, or Harry.

    • Nic919 says:

      That’s because HRHs don’t curtsy or bow to one another. Only the sovereign and out of respect Phillip. Debrett’s outlines all of this.

      • Mumzy says:

        The rules as to who must curtesy depends upon who is physically present—whether the non-royal has their royal spouse alongside. If royal spouse is absent, rules change. She will have to curtesy at times to “others.”

      • Merritt says:

        That is not true.

      • LAK says:

        Privately they all curtsey to each other according to rank. Usually the first time they see each other.

      • Nic919 says:

        The daily mail is not the place to source royal etiquette.

      • Merritt says:

        Neither is Twitter.

      • aaa says:

        This is my understanding as well. HRHs do not curtsy to other HRHs, if there is an HRH who other HRHs curtsy to, it’s Prince Prince Philip, but I am not sure about that.

        Some years back it became public that the Queen changed the order of precedence to favor blood princesses and that sparked a slew of articles about X having to curtsy to Y. Order of precedence is about entering and exiting rooms, seating arrangements and how names are listed, not curtsying.

        So other than perhaps Prince Philip, Meghan will not be curtsying to other HRHs nor will they be curtsying to her.

        If Meghan, Harry and the York Princesses are together, then Meghan takes precedence, e.g., she will enter the room first, because she is with Harry. If Harry is not present, then the York Princesses take precedent, but in neither scenario is Meghan curtsying or being curtsied to.

      • Mumzy says:

        Neither is Celebitchy, apparently. Lol.

      • Lisette says:

        She only has to curtsy to the Queen and Prince Philip.

        HRHs do NOT curtsy to other HRHs, regardless of rank.

        You’re mixing rank with precedence. She’ll share his precedence when he’s with her, but she drops behind the blood princesses when he’s not there.

    • Masamf says:

      Folks, curtseying is a choice one makes, its not a must do. Prince Harry once introduced American vets to TQ (I think it was prior to maybe a WWTW expedition? Can’t recall correctly), none of the American’s curtseyed to HM, not one. Michelle Obama never curtseyed to TQ. Just recently, I believe it was at the ANZAC service, only one woman curtseyed to William, the rest didn’t. Meghan has never curtseyed to William, at least not in public, so yeah, its a choice one makes. They can also choose to just bow their heads or something, but they can choose either or and I believe Meghan will choose to do whatever works for her. Now wether they curtsey to each other in private is something I can’t comment on because its done in private. And IMVHO, what they do in private is not a matter that should be discussed, its their private lives.

  6. Tiffany says:

    The woman is not stupid. She knows what she signed up for.

    Me personally, would not think this dude is worth it. But Meghan, you do you.

    • Grace says:

      My thoughts exactly.

    • Sage says:

      Yup! I like Harry but he does not seem worth the toxicity

    • ladida says:

      Yup. How I’ve felt this whole time. I don’t find him especially respectful of her and I’ve seen two examples of that now. She’ll stick around for a few years and then she’ll get tired of it.

      • ravynrobyn says:

        @ laddah-oh, I missed this! How/when was he disrespectful to her? Thanks!

  7. minx says:

    Well, frankly, she wanted the job. I think she’s certainly up to it.

    • Am not sure she knew exactly what the job entails, especially the part that where they press were going to talk shit. Press in US isn’t as viscous as uk press.

      • Milla says:

        They have little tasks, usually spend an hour at some place, you cannot live like that without something in return. That something comes up in tabloids. And that’s the deal. Sounds good to me.

      • perplexed says:

        How would anyone not know? She’s an actress. Even if she was not an A-list celebrity when she met Harry, she would know how other actresses in her industry are talked about in various media around the world.

        Anyone knows that the bigger your fame gets, the bigger the target on your back gets, and that’s even when you’re not royal. I’m sure she knows who Angelina Jolie is.

    • Eleonor says:

      She knows what’s the deal.
      I don’t know If I would be able to follow all this “rules”, to me, even if I am European, it’s ridicoulous, the existence of Monarchy is ridicoulous. I couldn’t stand the idea of my taxes going to them, to ALL of them.

      • tealily says:


      • Ankhel says:

        Well, if you’re American, your money goes to the upkeep and protection of various Trumps instead.

      • tealily says:

        Yeah, but only for (maybe) four years. It’s ridiculous, but most presidencies don’t abuse it.

      • Amelie says:

        Actually US presidents and their spouses get Secret Service protection for life. For awhile between 1997-2010 it was limited to only 10 years after a President leaves office. But Obama reinstated the lifetime Secret Service protection. Which was smart of him to do because as the first African-American president he definitely needs it. According to Wikipedia Nixon was the only president to ever relinquish Secret Service protection, for obvious reasons.

        SO guess what. This means Trump and Melania will get a lifetime of Secret Service protection. Unless Melania divorces Trump, not sure how that works out for her. But Trump will always be protected by them. Not sure if Secret Service protection post-presidency is funded by taxpayer money… but I can’t see why it wouldn’t be.

      • tealily says:

        Yeah, we don’t pay for abuses on air travel, etc. for life though. I’ve never heard of anyone having a problem with paying for Secret Service protection for presidents or ex-presidents, have you? Paying for the security of elected officials is not really the same thing as paying for for the literal palaces of a rich family who are in their station for no other reason that the virtue of their birth… in addition to paying for the Prime Minister and other government functions.

    • homeslice says:

      I don’t know…I think of Grace Kelly. I think she definitely regretted her marriage.

      I don’t think anyone knows until some time passes. Seems to me Harry and Meg have lots of chemistry and everything is new and exciting. Will they stand the test of time…I guess we’ll see.

      • Veronica T says:

        Harry and Meghan are still in the infatuation stage, which lasts about 18 months. The first 15 months of their relationship they lived in different countries and had snatched weekends and vacations together. It was lovely and romantic and exciting and breathless.

        Give them time, give them stress, the shine wears off every marriage. Add in that they are from SUCH different worlds, his friends were not her friends, and Harry is pretty dim and also very selfish and entitled, just like his brother. He will want to go Dad Dance, like Wills, and I don’t know how Meghan would tolerate his aristo friends and all they entail, but I doubt Harry will give them up for life.

        I mean, hey, none of us have any idea, we are just looking at this and using what we know of relationships and the percentages. I would give them a less than 50% chance of making it a decade, but she has so much invested in this, I don’t see her pulling away. I see harry doing it cause he wants his old life with his old pals, smoking and drinking and partying.

        Time will tell.

      • Masamf says:

        @Homeslice the Edward and Sophie married for love, they still together 20 years later and still counting.

    • Megan says:

      I could deal with the curtsies, but I walk really fast. Having to stay one step behind the next ranking royal would be really hard for me. I hate being behind someone walking slow.

  8. Mia4s says:

    She’s an actress, it’s a part to play. Honestly I think she’ll adjust faster than most of those who “married in” did.

  9. The Original G says:

    This idea that she needs to take some protocol or brand lessons from the royals is pretty rich really…… These attempts elevate all this to some sort brain-surgery is tiresome as well.

    • Marr says:

      You’d think royal protocol is rocket science and that one would be in need of a PhD to be able to fully grasp it lol.

    • Moneypenny424 says:

      Ha! I was just coming to say the same thing. Sure, there are things to remember, but this is not intellectually challenging stuff.

  10. margot t says:

    oh, come on. that is not even an issue. im sure meghan is capable of remembre who to curtsy

  11. Maum says:

    I’m not a great fan of her royal fashion but that green dress with black blazer is so pretty! Perfect way to do floral without looking like a Coachella extra.
    Cute and professional.

    I woul so wear that.

  12. Nel says:

    Nota hasn’t commented yet. We need a history lesson on how worthless Kate is and how MM shouldn’t curtesty to a woman who can’t even take a professional photo of her baby.

  13. Umyeah says:

    “Protocol is important tp the royals” of course it is, this is a family that considered “better” than regular folks bc of the family they happened to born into. Without protocol they are just like us.

    • tealily says:

      Haha exactly right! It’s all they have. Protocol and boatloads of taxpayers’ money.

    • Veronica T says:

      It’s crazy, right?? Can you imagine curtsying to your family members?? LOL!! I can’t even understand the thinking that I would curtsy to anyone!!! So weird!

  14. perplexed says:

    Curtseying will probably be easier to deal with than dealing with her annoying half-siblings. You pick your battles. I’d pick the former.

  15. Taxi says:

    She’s used to learning scripts & acting, thus separating personal opinions & feeling from the role required in the moment. Does she really have to curtsey to Kate in public? Kate isn’t “of the blood” so maybe not.
    I suppose since Kate has to curtsey to Bea & Eug that Meg will too? As Harry & Eugenie are so close, I imagine E will make it as easy as possible in most situations. If Meg is already seated when a young blood royal enters, does she have to stand up & curtsey? When does she have to start curtseying to the Cambridge children?
    Meg’s getting the man she loves & a very privileged lifestyle, so I think, just like acting parts she might not have really liked, she’ll see it as a job & it won’t bother her much.

    • Nic919 says:

      Once Meghan is an HRH she will not curtsy to anyone but the Queen, as she is sovereign.

      • LAK says:

        Being HRH isn’t enough. They are still ranked eg the blood Princes rank higher than the inlaws, and the inlaws rank according to the rank of their royal spouse depending on whether said spouse is with them.

        And privately, behind closed doors, they all curtsey to each other.

      • Nic919 says:

        Richard Palmer just confirmed on Twitter that HRHs don’t curtesy to each other. Everyone seems to be relying on a daily mail article about royal etiquette when normally the Mail gets criticized for being inaccurate. But Palmer is the royal correspondent for the Express. I would think he is more knowledgeable than some random writers from the DM.

      • violet says:

        @Nic – oh, yes she will. She will curtsey to her father in law, the Prince of Wales, and when he becomes King, and William and Kate become Prince and Princess of Wales, they will outrank Meghan and Harry technically. W&K’s kids will get bumped up the hierarchy, too, especially George, who will be next Prince of Wales. When Charles becomes King, Meghan (and Kate!) will also technically have to curtsey to Camilla, no matter what they call her officially. And when (if!) George becomes King, Meghan and Harry and their children will all have to curtsey/bow to W&K’s kid.

        @LAK – question: does the Princess Royal outrank Kate and Meghan at this point in time?

      • LAK says:

        Nic919: You can fill a room with all the factual things Richard Palmer doesn’t know. He frequently sources from royal fans despite being the *royal correspondent at the Express*. The same goes for most royal reporters.

        Violet – Yes. She’s a blood Prince.

        However, if William or Harry are present when she encounters Kate or MM respectively, then it reverses because they take the rank of their spouse, and William & Harry outrank Anne.

      • PrincessK says:

        I do not think that Anne needs to curtsey to Meghan when Harry is present because I think when the Queen made her Princess Royal it somehow elevated her in the pecking order.

      • aaa says:

        As I stated above, I have the same understanding as you.

        When Meghan marries in she will not have to curtsy to Charles because they are both HRHs, when he ascends and becomes His Majesty, that is when Meghan and the other HRHs will start curtsying to him.

        Meghan and the other HRHs will start curtsying to William and Catherine when William ascends and they become Their Majesties.

      • LAK says:

        PrincessK: It wasn’t the title that did it. Her title is the highest honour amongst the female blood princes, but it doesn’t elevate her specifically.

        She had to follow the old order of precedence despite being Princess Royal (granted in 1987).

        However, when Camilla married in, that was a step too far and she insisted on a changed order of precedence that recognised her bloodline. That change elevated ALL the blood Princesses above the female in-laws.

        The only female higher would be Queen Consort.

    • Lisette says:

      HRHs do not curtsy to other HRHs – people get rank and precedence mixed up.

  16. AG-UK says:

    She is smart and she loves him so she’ll deal with it. I mean she can probably be “herself” behind closed doors but different in public. This is the life she signed up for.

  17. Paperclip468 says:

    I would love to see a top line summary of the protocols!

  18. Nic919 says:

    So I was reading a royal twitter thread on this and the whole issue of rank and precedence is getting confused. Once Meghan is an HRH, she will not have to curtsy to anyone but the sovereign. This means there is no curtsying to Kate, Camilla etc. HRHs do not curtsy to each other. However, the precedence will differentiate who enters a room first when it comes to formal functions. Technically no one is obligated to even curtsy to Phillip. But they may do so as a sign of respect.

    • BrandyAlexander says:

      I wonder if thats really true – because otherwise, why did they change it so that Anne doesn’t have to curtsy to Camilla? I would assume they are all HRH’s. On the other hand, I wonder if any of them actually do it in private anyway.

    • LAK says:

      What BeandAlexander says is true.

      If they didn’t have to curtsey to each other, then Anne and Alexander wouldn’t have had a hissyfit about curtseying to Camilla and other HRH inlaws thus forcing the Queen to change the order of precedence to put the blood princes ahead of the inlaws.

    • Nic919 says:

      What they changed is Anne not waiting for Camilla to enter a room first. That’s what order of precedence is about. It’s not like they wouldn’t be petty about something like that either.

      • LAK says:

        That is not the reason the order was changed. Anne and Alexandra were salty about having to *curtsey* to Camilla, nevermind entering a room before her. To ensure that they didn’t have to curtsey to her except when Charles was present because then her rank matched his.

    • aaa says:

      Yep. The Queen changed the order of precedence in 2005 to favor blood princesses in order to appease Princess Anne. Order of precedence is about who enters a room first, not about bowing and curtsying.

  19. Heat says:

    I swear, some people equate her marrying Prince Harry to Uncle Jed packing up the Clampett’s to move to the hills of Beverly!
    She hasn’t been living under a rock her whole life; I’m sure she’s aware that things are going to be different, and there’s a staff of people to help her along the way.

    • Olenna says:

      Ha! So true, but now you’ve got me thinking about cement ponds and chickens (for roast chicken, of course) on the front lawn of their yet-to-be-announced country pile.

  20. Lucy says:

    I’m pretty sure she’ll be fine. Having said that, I kinda hope she breaks some of those unspoken rules. Not because I want the media to come after her (not at all), but because I’d love her to be like “ain’t nobody got time for that” and just get down to whatever work activity she has to do.

  21. Beta says:

    HRH’s do not curtsy to other HRH. They only curtsy to HM and sometimes Phil. Has anyone ever seen Beatrice or Eugenie curtsy to Will and Harry? Or Harry bow to Will or even his father? It does not happen.

    • aaa says:


      Charles does not get bowed and curtsied to by other HRHs and will not until he ascends. Ditto for William.

  22. klutzy_girl says:

    Meghan’s mom is now in England and staying at Kensington Palace with them, and her dad’s arriving later today!

    • minx says:

      Can’t wait.

    • PrincessK says:

      Yaay!! It is really getting exciting. Doria is in KP? Anyway I believe that she has been there before. I am sure everyone is really getting excited now.

  23. Anastasia says:

    Yeah, if I were her, I’d need at least a tiny Ativan before the wedding!

    I think she’ll do great.

  24. Nel says:

    Lol. MM won’t be breaking any rules, she will follow protocol.

  25. Mee says:

    She already knows and is doing this stuff. Watch the video from Easter or something, she curtsies to the Queen with Kate and other women, while the men give a military esque salute.

  26. C. Remm says:

    I don’t believe this. These are the rules of the old monarchy from the Queen. Prince Charles will change this and modernise it. Who is Andrew Morton? Name sounds familiar but I don’t know where to put him. Is that the one with the book about Meghan?

    • LAK says:

      Andrew Morton was famously Diana’s ghost writer for her autobiography Diana: Her true story.

      • C. Remm says:

        Ah, then he is the one writing a book about Meghan without ever having spoken to her.

    • Milla says:

      Don’t think so. Those ancient rules are the only thing keeping the idea of monarchy alive. They need to be different. That’s all they do while having all the money in the world.

      • aaa says:

        Monarchies modernize all the time. World War I brought the end to many European monarchies and IMO the reason that British monarchy survived when many others did not was because the BRF made modernizing changes or had changes forced upon them decades, if not centuries, before the Great War.

        I get the point that the monarchies represent tradition and stability, nevertheless modern monarchies cannot stay stuck. Charles and William cannot turn everything upside down but their reigns cannot be a replication of Elizabeth II’s either.

      • LAK says:

        What aaa said.

        Monarchies modernise all the time. No reign is the same as the previous one. Protocol and rules are set or reset by each new monarch.

        The trick is to make it look like the rules don’t change usually by stealth via incremental changes. Unless some crisis forces a big change on the institution.

        The Queen has made lots of changes even though she’s used her father and grandfather’s own changes as her blueprint. The death of her mother freed her to throw out many rules which had been kept in place in consideration of the Queen Mother.

        The Queen has reigned for so long that few people have a living memory of previous reigns or even her early reign. Her rules are assumed to be centuries old when many are only as old as her reign and some are recent.

        Charles’s reign will be different as will William’s reign.

  27. guestaroo says:

    I mean, this is a woman who was managing being a mixed-race actress in an industry where she spent a lot of her time being professionally pretty. How is it really that different then walking a red carpet, having a publicist telling you to “stand there, and then there, then turn around and pose to show your back side” and having to give endless interviews about what she’s wearing.

    I’m not saying this as a critique of Hollywood or really even anything about the etiquette rules of the monarchy, but I bet she had just as many (spoken and unspoken) etiquette rules she had to learn when she first got into acting and then again when she had her first big role on Suits. If anything, a lot of these things may feel less stifling then attending, say, one of the big awards shows.

    And honestly, there’s no way she got to this point without realizing that she has basically signed up to be a professional wife. Like some others in the thread, I’m not sure I could do it – no matter how much I loved Harry – it feels like she’s giving up all the best parts about being a celebrity (the career she built, the actual acting itself, the ability to use social media and her public platform to effectuate change) for all the worst parts about being a celebrity (having everything you wear or do criticized, constant public events, as I mentioned – being professionally pretty, and all that jazz).

  28. Andrea says:

    As an American, some things may be difficult to swallow for her. I am an American living several years in Canada now and I am still getting used to the British type attitude towards friendships/relationships etc. I am used to having loads of friends and up here, people tend to have 2-3 friends since high school/university and infiltrating such groups is nigh impossible. Meeting people in general romantically or friend-wise is slow going. People are way more guarded. And busy. And their interactions with you are scheduled and more formal. I have thought often of moving to BC (I am in Toronto) thinking it may be a better fit for me. I have been here 6 years and it still doesn’t feel like home to me yet, despite the many other reasons I love it up here.

    • Kalani says:

      Move west. Toronto not the friendliest place. I’ve heard that from numerous colleagues who were transferred there over the years

    • Lex says:

      I found Vancouver to be just the same as you are describing. People are nice on face value but are uneasy at taking it any further. They have their friends and plans already, that’s that. Getting young folk I worked with to go for a drink after work or something was like pulling teeth – I am a friendly young woman! Not weird, creepy, clingy, inappropriate… just a regular person. The friends I made were from overseas like me, or had just moved back to Vancouver from elsewhere and thus were in need of new friends! And they were awesome friends too.. so don’t discount locals but maybe don’t rely on them totally 🙂

  29. Rachiesparrow says:

    It’s all just so much hot air. The British tabloid press are poison, and pander to a decidedly stupid demographic – they tell people these things matter, and so they think they do. Meghan will do well because she’s intelligent, she’s an actress and she can turn up her natural charm, and in the end she knows it’s all nonsense, held over from an age that people who voted for Brexit hark back to with some kind of false sentimentality. I think she’ll be fine. It’s the rest of the country I worry about. I feel like we’re losing the battle to drag Britain kicking and screaming into a more modern, tolerant, inclusive world.

    • LAK says:

      The one thing that is decidedly a burden for any royal is intelligence. You can’t cope with the ennui of it all if you are intelligent.

      And that’s not a slam of MM or any members who are intelligent. It’s simply the nature of the beast.

  30. Adele Dazeem says:

    I’m a Meghan Stan, but this is going to be an epic flameout. I think she’s going to be living this life a few months (years?) in and be like WTF did I sign up for and flee the coup. The sex will be stale, the media attention will die down (and will be BRUTAL when it’s there) and she’s going to miss her old free life and her independence. Just look at how Diana and Kate have lost their fire. Diana was a kid that grew up w this stuff and Kate is a cypher…and it still beat them up. Imagine what will happen to Meghan. She’ll fight back.

    • Amelie says:

      I have to say… when did Kate ever have fire! She was never known to be some kind of go getter driven person.

      • Adele Dazeem says:

        Fire might not be the perfect word choice but if you google old photos of her in the clubs, the rowing club with the controversial friend, she was definitely more smiley and seemingly interesting. Personality is now gone and her smiles don’t seem genuine to me IMHO.

      • Bitsy says:

        Kate so clearly had character, style, and hobbies before marriage. So what if she didn’t work? Since when did holding a job equal great character or morals?
        Before she received her HRH she was always on the go playing tennis, sking, rowing, she is clearly an athlete. And she seemed to always be laughing and having fun. I agree that she now is boring and subdued. The so-called waity years was her waiting to give up her freedom and joie de vivre. She and Meg are lucky tjat they had their 20s to be wild.

    • Taxi says:

      Charles & Will are the 2 next heirs. Consequently, their wives are subject to much closer scrutiny than MM will get. From what I see, those farther from the throne get less attention & are not held to as high a standard.

  31. tealily says:

    This sh*t is so stupid. I have no patience for royal nonsense. It’s ridiculous.

    • Sage says:

      😆…it’s a soap opera but some people really take it seriously.

    • LAK says:

      And yet, this is the stuff in our history books. Centuries of royal gossip.

      In real time, as stupid then as it is now, but then we make our descendants take tests on it.

    • tealily says:

      Yup, the histories of the people who can afford to fund the preservation of their legacies are the ones who live on.

  32. K says:

    “I would constantly forget how to behave, because Americans just aren’t raised to even think about those things”

    um no nationality is raised to think of those things!

  33. konspiracytheory says:

    “This was a girl who was a gender equality advocate for the United Nations”

    Dude, if ever there was a sentence where it would help to use the word ‘woman’ instead of ‘girl’…

    • Blair Warner says:

      That stood out for me too! Glaring example of women not being taken seriously.

  34. Amelie says:

    Aristocratic people are touchy about protocol and their titles but most people in Europe do not grow up inherently knowing royal etiquette. My dad’s family is from France, most of his family is lower middle class. My grandmother was a stay at home mom, my grandfather was a sailor. I’m pretty sure most of my French family knows nothing about this kind of stuff. If you told my dad he had to bow to someone, he’d be like WTF.

    I wonder how this will affect Jack Brooksbank, Princess Eugenie’s fiance. I’m assuming he has to bow and not curtsy. Who does he bow to apart from the Queen? Prince Andrew? Prince Charles? Does Princess Anne’s husband (forget his name) bow to anyone apart from the Queen?

    • aaa says:

      That’s a good question, I wonder what protocols non-HRH family members follow.

      When it comes to bowing and curtsying, my guess is that Tim and Jack, like the HRH family members, only bow to the Queen and possibly Prince Philip.

  35. SJhere says:

    Listen, for the life of wealth and luxury she is marrying into, if it was me…Yeah, bring on the protocol and rules for the few days of public work she will actually do.

  36. AnotherDirtyMartini says:

    She appears to be very happy. Yes, she’s an an actor, could be hiding her misery lol..but I think she’ll be fine and will thrive.

  37. So Cal says:

    So once Meg has an HRH she won’t have to curtsy to the other HRHs (William, Kate, Charles, Camilla, etc), only the Queen and sometimes Prince Philip, ok. So when Meg greeted William at the ANZAC Day service on April 25 wasn’t she suppose to curtsy to him since she didn’t have an HRH at the time?

    • aaa says:

      It’s the non-royal’s prerogative whether or not to curtsy. I don’t recall seeing non-royal family members like Peter, Zara and Autumn bowing and curtsying to their HRH relatives, so IMO Meghan not curtsying to Will is neither odd nor a breach of protocol.

    • Lyla says:

      You curtsy the first time you see them that day. So if she saw William earlier, that’s when she would have curtsied.

      HRHs still have to cursty each other. When Meg is with Harry, she’ll be elevated to his rank and will have to curtsy to people above them – the queen, Charles, Camilla. If Harry isn’t present, then she drops to the status before marriage. For example, if she sees Beatrice when Harry is present, B curtsies to them. If Meg sees Beatrice without Harry, Meg curtsies to B. Blood princesses outrank in-laws when the husband aren’t present.

      • Lex says:

        Except before they are married Meghan, especially as a foreigner, doesn’t have to curtsy to anyone! 🙂
        Although she may choose to, but that’s up to her.

      • aaa says:

        What you are referring to is order of precedence which refers to protocols around entering and exiting rooms, seating arrangements and how names are listed, not curtsying. Other than to perhaps Prince Philip, HRHs do not curtsy to other HRHs.

  38. Peg says:

    Talking of stalkers, Ninaki Priddy is scary, when will she and her mother stop releasing videos of Meghan?
    I bet she and her mother will be in the crowds in Windsor, unless a network hires her. Ninaki is thirsty, she must be busting her nuts, that she can’t be in the church video taping the ceremony to sell it to the dailymail later.

  39. Cerys says:

    By choosing to marry into the Royal family, Meghan will have to follow their archaic customs whether she likes them or not. As a modern, independent woman, it may be hard to conform and I wish her luck.

  40. HeyThere! says:

    She must really love him because I don’t see how anyone would go into this ‘firm’ willingly. I wouldn’t. Just being honest. Then again its just social media and the internet that makes being royal so much more difficult these days. Before all this, I think it would have been manageable.

    I’m excited for the royal wedding. I think they will find having MM working for the firm will help them greatly.

    On a side note, I have an immediate family member who married into a very public family who are one percenters. It can be hard for the normal family(mine) because our holidays and lives have to revolve around the other family. They take about 10-15 vacations a year. Working around that alone is impossible! We get what’s leftover. It sucks but you can’t but he hand that feeds you(them not us). I hope MM mom and what family she has that she likes are cared about. It’s hard being on the other side because nobody understands. There just isn’t room for the other people’s(mines) family holidays or family traditions. It’s sad. Sorry had to vent. I love everyone but it’s hard.