Lena Dunham made a thorough apology to Aurora Perrineau in THR

The Boys In The Band 50th Anniversary Celebration - Arrivals.

I really hoped that New York Magazine’s cover story about Lena Dunham a few weeks ago would be the last we would hear from her for a while. But of course that isn’t happening. That disaster profile was merely the opening salvo for Lena’s latest incarnation. The New Lena is just the same as Old Lena, only now she’s… like, more apologetic? I don’t know. I honestly don’t want to waste my brain space on this – we’ve all agreed that Lena should be canceled and IS canceled, and yet… she keeps talking, and keeps getting work. Her latest work? She’s the guest editor of The Hollywood Reporter’s Women In Entertainment issue, because white feminism. She used her guest-editor-letter to expound on Harvey Weinstein and rape and her own stories of sexual harassment and assault. But she also included a lengthy apology to Aurora Perrineau, the young woman who accused Girls producer Murray Miller of raping her. Lena had previously called Aurora a liar, but Lena let it be known that she apologized to the Perrineau family. And here’s the bigger apology:

Like so many women (so many people), I disguised my pain with medication and stuff and chronic overwork, with social media and mindless dating and the random day-to-day drama we generate to stay out of our own experience. I never stopped, much less stopped to consider that I might be capable of traumatizing somebody, too (the exact complaint I’ve always had about old white man artists).

And so I made a terrible mistake. When someone I knew, someone I had loved as a brother, was accused, I did something inexcusable: I publicly spoke up in his defense. There are few acts I could ever regret more in this life. I didn’t have the “insider information” I claimed but rather blind faith in a story that kept slipping and changing and revealed itself to mean nothing at all. I wanted to feel my workplace and my world were safe, untouched by the outside world (a privilege in and of itself, the privilege of ignoring what hasn’t hurt you) and I claimed that safety at cost to someone else, someone very special.

To Aurora: You have been on my mind and in my heart every day this year. I love you. I will always love you. I will always work to right that wrong. In that way, you have made me a better woman and a better feminist. You shouldn’t have been given that job in addition to your other burdens, but here we are, and here I am asking: How do we move forward? Not just you and I but all of us, living in the gray space between admission and vindication.

It’s painful to realize that, while I thought I was self-aware, I had actually internalized the dominant male agenda that asks us to defend it no matter what, protect it no matter what, baby it no matter what. Something in me still feels compelled to do that job: to please, to tidy up, to shopkeep. My job now is to excavate that part of myself and to create a new cavern inside me where a candle stays lit, always safely lit, and illuminates the wall behind it where these words are written: I see you, Aurora. I hear you, Aurora. I believe you, Aurora. This space is yours to do with as you please, when you please. I will keep holding this space — it will always be here.

…Aurora — your bravery, openness, forgiveness, dignity and grace in the face of legal proceedings and endless questioning and in the face of my statement has been astounding. You’ve been a model of stoicism, all the while reminding other women that their assault experiences are theirs to process as they wish (with noise, with silence, with rage — it’s all OK). You have generously allowed me to speak about your many virtues here and tell these readers that you are moving on as a woman and as an artist. You have inspired me to do the same, and I know I’m not alone. Aurora’s mother, Brittany, is fierce, powerful, a born leader, a patient mother, the kind of woman I hope to be. Getting to know her has been the unexpected gift that came from being humbled and reassessing so much over the past year: about women and power.

[From The Hollywood Reporter]

*holds out hands and shakes head* I appreciate that it’s a comprehensive apology. I do not appreciate the fact that it’s a comprehensive written apology more than a year after Lena called Aurora a liar. I also don’t believe that Lena actually learned a thing, and that’s why Lena is still f–king canceled – she writes a good apology, for sure, but after how many years of this do we acknowledge that Lena doesn’t have a learning curve? That she shouldn’t get a f–king cookie for making a thorough apology every time she f–ks up?

Smiling Lena Dunham makes a coffee stop in West Hollywood

Photos courtesy of WENN, Backgrid.

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30 Responses to “Lena Dunham made a thorough apology to Aurora Perrineau in THR”

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  1. KG says:

    I also don’t appreciate that it’s AN OPEN LETTER. Write a personal apology, send it off, shut up.

  2. Chaine says:

    She is one of those people that always wants to be rewarded for eventually doing the thing that she should have done in the first place.

    • Snazzy says:

      Yes! It’s more about the show. This woman turns me into a rage monster. I click on the article just so I can rage and then comment about how she makes me rage. I probably need help.

  3. Incredulous says:

    I got as far as this cobblers -

    When someone I knew, someone I had loved as a brother, was accused, I did something inexcusable: I publicly spoke up in his defense.

    Idiot, absolute cretinous ninny. Shut up, go away, stay away.

  4. BANANIE says:

    I certainly hope Aurora “generously allowed” her to share this, and didn’t blindside her.

    • Chaine says:

      You know she didn’t and Aurora is probably completely blindsided and retraumatized by Lena using Aurora’s assault as a springboard for Lena’s miserable rebranding attempt.

  5. mazzie says:

    Whatever. She’ll say or do something stupid and racist again, apologize, get forgiven and do it again. Wash, rinse, repeat.

  6. Meg says:

    It’s a Dunham apology that manages to make it about Dunham.

    This clown needs to go away from the public eye. She can “grow” in private.

  7. Chubcucumber says:

    I don’t think that’s a good apology, or even an apology, period.

    She is basically saying, “Oops, sorry I said you were a liar, Aurora, but it’s not really my fault! More importantly thanks for giving me a reason to use my enormous platform to talk about how all of this affected me and all the things *I’ve* suffered in the past which were probably way worse than what you went through. Maybe at some point if you ask nicely I’ll amplify something you want to say in this public space that rightfully belongs to me.”

    It’s the long form version of “I’m sorry you’re upset but…”

  8. Tiffany says:

    Kayleigh Donaldson over at Pajiba rightfully ripped her on this crap and called her out on her treatment of Aurora. Kayleigh is normally even keeled but she was not having it. Good.

  9. Marty says:

    This shit is gross. Don’t call someone a flat out liar, then tell them you’ll always love them. How can she say so many words and still have them be so meaningless?

  10. Jenns says:

    JFC what apology number is this?

    And I didn’t even bother to read it because she should’ve kept her mouth shut in the first place. God, she is the worst.

  11. JA says:

    This is not an apology in any way, shape, or form. She takes no accountability for her behavior — she blames medication, overwork, social media, the dominant male agenda.

    She then humble brags her way through the rest of the piece — “you’ve made me a better woman, a better feminist.” Well done! Good for you, Lena. So glad you’re better than you were before.

    And she is now the victim’s champion — “My job now is to excavate that part of myself and to create a new cavern inside me where a candle stays lit, always safely lit, and illuminates the wall behind it where these words are written: I see you, Aurora. I hear you, Aurora. I believe you, Aurora.” Good for you, Lena, aren’t you marvelous! I want to throw up.

    Please, please, please go away, Lena, and don’t ever come back.

    • QueenB says:

      “This is not an apology in any way, shape, or form.” DING DING DING.

      Its Lena talking about Lena. Seriously how can you apologize way too late and make everything about yourself? And its not like Lena has never apologized before. She should have the experience.

  12. Jensays says:

    It it just me or does her apology fail to say “I apologize” or “I’m sorry” say at least once? It’s more of a “I acted this bad way because of xyz”

    She never takes responsibility.

  13. Ader says:

    Has Jenni Konner ever apologized? She was right there along with Lena, calling Aurora a liar.

    • Tiffany says:

      I am glad she did not. Pretending is worst than just being garbage. Jenni is owning it.

    • Chubcucumber says:

      I just googled and the day after Dunham released the statement calling Perrinau a liar on behalf of herself and Konner, she tweeted out another statement, again on behalf of herself and Konner, apologizing and retracting the original one.

      It’s interesting that their partnership broke up since. I wonder how much Konner really had to do with the original statement defending Murray. Why is Dunham now apologizing only on her own behalf without mentioning Konner?

      • Chubcucumber says:

        So I just re-read what Dunham says about Konner and their relationship in that long interview in The Cut and I suspect Dunham issued the original “joint” statement calling Perrineau a liar without Konner’s input or permission. Which, if that’s what happened, is totally messed up, but would explain their ending their partnership and Lenny letter, why Zinzi Clemens only called out Dunham, etc.

        Two quotes:

        “Now she doesn’t have to absorb whatever bullshit I tweet that day,” Dunham says. “Whatever I do doesn’t have to now be hers, which, I’m sure I’d imagine if I were her, would be a relief.”

        And:

        The only times Dunham gets uncharacteristically tight-lipped are when I ask questions about Konner. When she starts her answers, they are usually hedged with “All I will say is” or “I don’t want to speak for Jenni.”

      • QueenB says:

        @Chubcumber: Thank you, I didnt want to read all that Lena talking. This is very clear. Seriously, at least most of the time Lena only made herself look like an idiot.

        Holy crap, can you imagine being publicly used to defend a rapist?

  14. CharliePenn says:

    She is such a blowhard a-hole. Good lord.

  15. Starryfish29 says:

    This is so gross, the only purpose of this is to make herself look better. Apologize to the person you wronged and let them decide what to do with it, don’t use it to draw attention to yourself. She is truly the worst.

  16. Bkittyb says:

    Lena Dunham is the trope for white women feminists that handicap the entire movement. This goes beyond calling Aurora a liar. It has undertones of race, control of black women’s bodies, victim blaming, rapist sympathizing, white supremacy, and all the usual -isms which make her a disgusting human being to me. This is not an apology whatever. It is awful, and I wish she could be completely canceled.

  17. Kathryn says:

    We live in “cancelled” culture and yet we can’t cancel Lena Dunham?

  18. bears says:

    I have a friend who is very much like Lena Dunham (she’s also a huge fan of Girls and thinks Hannah is such a great character!). She is selfish, shortsighted, flippant about the things that do not directly pertain to her bubble, etc. I’ve seen her do incredibly inconsiderate and outright rude things and then throw her hands up in the air like an innocent doll: Who, ME?? No awareness of how she is perceived by other people. Her apologies are always self serving and her regrets are only ever temporary. That being said, she is sometimes a delight to be around and when she shines her spotlight on you, you feel warm. It causes the people closest to her to forgive/forget that fact that she is a big hard, shiny plastic ball of MEMEMEMEME all of the time except when it suits her to be otherwise. So I get Lena Dunham. She’s no surprise. She’s just like all the other white, privileged, ignorant girls I’ve known and subsequently distanced myself from over the years. She’s as common as a house mouse.

  19. Blueskiesplease says:

    This woman is beyond help. Where to start? Go away, Lena.

  20. Electric Tuba says:

    My god. Well C u next Tuesday, Lena. You slovenly sack of crap

  21. greenmonster says:

    This is disgusting. She makes it all about herself (as usual), then she says she made a ‘mistake’. No, calling a rape victim a liar and pretending to have insider information when you have not, is not a mistake! it is much worse and so sinnister. This open letter is nothing more than a strategically planned move to get into good graces with the general public but esp. WOC.

  22. Ada says:

    Real headline: ‘Lena Dunham admits to lying about possessing evidence of a false rape accusation’

    what the hell…? She straight up admits she lied about having ‘insider information’. Why is this turning into a story about her apologising? This isn’t a case of Dunham was lied to by this alleged rapist, or she unwisely defended a friend based in the fact that they were friends… she claimed to have evidence that the rape accusation wasn’t true!

    I have some sympathy for the friends and family of accused rapists (or murderers or any other criminals). If someone I loved dearly like my brother, father, husband, was accused of something like this, I’m sure my first reaction would be ‘No, I don’t believe it, it can’t be true’. I hope I wouldn’t publically put this statement out for the victim to read, but I understand the impulse to feel it. But Dunham didn’t just make an unwise statement of support for a friend she didn’t believe capable of such a crime, she LIED ABOUT THERE BEING EVIDENCE that it didn’t happen!

    ‘I didn’t have the “insider information” I claimed but rather blind faith in a story’

    I can’t get over this. Surely this must be a crime of some sort…? I realise it wasn’t a statement under oath in a court of law or anything, but surely the victim could sue her for defamation or libel or whatever…?

    I can’t believe she just slipped that in there like it was nothing…

  23. DesertReal says:

    “I appreciate that it’s a comprehensive apology.”

    Nope. It’s not an apology if someone tries to justify themselves/ rationalizes their behavior and doesn’t ever say “I’m sorry” or “I apologize.” Sorry.