Madonna is a famous hypochondriac, right? I’ve seen Truth or Dare and I remember all the stories about how “health conscious” she is and how she’s deathly afraid of being sick. I think the coronavirus has thrown a lot of hypochondriacs for a loop – every fear they’ve had has been realized on a global scale. And what’s the reaction? For Madonna, she’s feeling oddly calm. She filmed herself taking a bath (with rose petals) as she discussed how corona is “the great equalizer.” Not now, Madge. Here’s her message (transcribed by Page Six):
“That’s the thing about COVID-19. It doesn’t care about how rich you are, how famous you are, how funny you are. How smart you are, where you live, how old you are, what amazing stories you can tell. It’s the great equalizer and what’s terrible about it is what’s great about it. What’s terrible about it is that it’s made us all equal in many ways, and what’s wonderful about is, is that it’s made us all equal in many ways. Like I used to say at the end of ‘Human Nature’ every night, if the ship goes down, we’re all going down together.”
As you can imagine, the comments were like “dafaq” and “actually, poor people will suffer more.” Which is true. I think Madonna was trying to say that anyone, rich or poor, can contract Covid-19 and suffer. But she wrapped up that message in typical Madonna obliviousness. Poor people are being charged thousands of dollars to get tested, if they can even get tested, while rich people have immediate access to free tests. Poor people will suffer more with the economic crash while Madonna will lose millions and still own multiple homes and still be one of the richest women in the world.
You know who else I’ve been thinking about during this self-isolation/quarantine life? Preppers. People who spent years prepping for the apocalypse with go-bags and cash stashes and bunkers and mega-supplies of soap, soup, gasoline, etc. Have we not heard a lot about preppers because they’re literally in their millionaire-prepper bunkers?
Photos courtesy of Backgrid and Instagram.