I’ve read a few think pieces wondering what the Kardashian-Jenners will do now that Keeping Up with the Kardashians is ending. That surprises me because I feel like the Kardashians have methodically found avenues that work for each of them and have been throwing their attention in that direction for a few years now. And whether they are successful like Kylie’s beauty business or Kim’s SKIMS line, or less so, like Khloe’s jeans or Kourtney’s Poosh site, they hype their projects wherever they can. I tried to watch – but quickly gave up on – that home organizing show, Get Organized with The Home Edit and Khloe’s entire episode seemed like a promotion for her and her sister’s side projects. So, will it surprise anyone that Kylie posted a What’s in My Bag video to her YouTube channel that turned out to be one eight-minute commercial for her Kylie products? It shouldn’t:
Buzzfeed graciously listed all the Kylie products she hawked, so I’m borrowing from them:
* Unreleased Kylie Skin hand sanitiser
* A Kylie Skin PR card for a soon-to-be-released hyaluronic acid serum, including a plug for the release date.
* The Kylie x KKW Fragrance collab, which Kylie called her “favourite perfume of all time”.
* Unreleased Kylie Skin scrunchies.
* Kylie x Kendall blotting powder.
* Kylie Skin sunscreen.
* Kylie Skin wipes.
* A face mask from Kim’s Skims line.
* Kylie Skin lip balms along with an announcement for an upcoming restock.
* A plug for Kylie’s collab with Ulta for plumping lip gloss, including the release date.
* Numerous Kylie Cosmetics Lip Kits, including one that’s yet to be released.
* The Kylie x Kendall lip blush.
In addition to those items, she has some Extra gum for “normal gum things” and apple sauce to bribe Stormi. Plus some plush pea pod that she said was her new friend. So whereas I am not surprised, I’m a little bummed because we used to do these What’s in My Bag as writing exercises on some of the collaborative sites and I kind of enjoyed them. They provide a fun way to tell who you are as a person and a great way to wind some story telling into the narrative. Kylie did not sign up for that writing course, though, because she drones on in a monotone that makes me wonder if she really is the best spokesperson for her products. But that’s not the only objection I had to the video. I won’t do minute by minute because nether Kylie or I are interesting enough for me to do that, but few notes:
0:08 – Okay, her So Black edition Birkin is absolutely gorgeous. If we had just stayed here, I might have been okay with the video
0:16 – And by “Kris Jenner,” she means ‘Mom’ or “Satan’s Step-Child”
0:55 – “something, something pr bs” but OMG – that teardrop ring!
1:09 – Kylie attempts to read ingredients for her serum, gets confused quickly and resorts to Trump’s catchall, “a lot of really good things” to round out the list
1:32 – Kylie applies some perfume. And by “applies” I mean she saturated herself in at least half the bottle
1:40 – Kylie starts to asphyxiate due to prior perfume soak
2:45 – When announcing her Kendall blotting powder, Kylie proclaims “it is hot as ***” so she relies on the product because she’s “sweating her makeup off.” She says this in a Lycra, high necked, long-sleeved body suit and leather skirt. How to Dress for Hot Weather -another class Kylie must have skipped.
3:00 – she’s seems so surprised by all the stuff someone has packed in her bag for her
5:22 – Kylie mentions her other house and other, likely packed and curated, closet, just in case you were starting to relate to her in any way
And then… Kylie, Kylie, Kylie. I mean, sure – get yours, Kylie. But her fans felt duped. They felt she should’ve admitted it was sponcon up front. I suppose if I followed her, I’d feel the same way but I expect anything to fall out of a Kardashian-Jenner mouth to cost something. And at least this is mostly makeup to get excited about, even if half of it is unavailable. Because I would sure as hell rather look at some lip pencils than a bedazzled Febreeze bottle. Surely Khloe has something better to do, no?
Photo credit: YouTube and Instagram
I honestly don’t get how her fans, or anyone at this point, can legit say they feel duped about anything Kylie Jenner it the rest of her grifter family does.
Every single thing they do revolves around self promotion, social media clicks and likes and press mentions. Everything.
That people are still shocked when nothing they do is genuine is on them at this point. If you really think that anyone in this family is doing it for any other reason after all the times they’ve proven otherwise, I predict that you will continue to experience many disappointments and disillusionment in life.
It’s sad that I watched the “This Is Paris” documentary last night (idk why, running out of Covid content I guess…), and found Paris Hilton much more down to Earth and relatable than any of these Kardashian women.
Why not just call Kris ‘Mom’. They all know that she is. That was weird and odd and makes it seem like they only really see her as a business manager and not the woman that birth and raised them.
Huh.
Also, those extension need a good trim. Extension are to be styled damnit.
You deserve a trophy for watching this. The museum display of shoes and handbags is fcking disgusting. And tone deaf.
I had no idea that was Khloe, she has morphed so much. Wtf on all the sparkly cleaning products. This family is truly from another planet.
I’m just going to say. I think Birkin bags are ugly. I have never understood how they became such status symbols.
I think their status symbol has gone down. I thought there was a years and years waiting list but i seem to see so many insta models and rappers girlfriends with those bags,i think they lost that elusiveness. I remember in the UK Burberry hated the ‘chavs’ wearing their label.
Maybe those who pay money for her products will see all of her bags and shoes and realize that’s where all their money is going?
I want to watch that Get Organized show, with working from home I am drowning in paper and stuff and the rest of my house is suffering as well, but I’ll skip any Kardashian episodes. They’re dull and only about money. No thanks.
In my bag I have an old lip gloss container that i re-filled with vaseline, a key chain with a few mystery keys on it, a couple loose kleenex and a wallet I’ve had for 15 years. Beat that Kylie!
Same! I have some diapers (for my 2 year old), some dirty tissues, a recipt, a bag full of makeup that I never use, my wallet, my glasses… and some embroidery scissors (also, never used).
I like you, Julia! *plucks out shabby rubber hair elastic*
Wallet, loose change, loose gum, tangled headphones, random receipts, and about 3 masks. Put me on tv!
Never trust a person without at lease 3 of these in her bag:
One or more balled-up tissues; TicTacs or similar; a spare hair tie; sunglasses; a bunch of 15 keys that you only 3 of; loose coins; bobby pins; a emery board; lip gloss; one or more screwed-up reipts; paracetamol; emergency tampons/pad; a pen that’s dried out; small screwdriver – extra marks for a mini tool kit; a wallet that’s seen better days; a ball of indeterminate fluff; the raffle tickets you were guilted into buying when you dropped off your kid at school; a shopping lit you know you won’t stick to; a muesli bar; an almost-empty lip gloss; ditto paw paw ointment…
Hm. Oh, god. What if it’s just me…?!
You’re in good company. 🙂 Of that list, I have:
One or more balled-up tissues; TicTacs or similar; a spare hair tie; sunglasses; loose coins; bobby pins; lip gloss; one or more screwed-up reipts; emergency tampons/pad; a pen that’s dried out; a wallet that’s seen better days; a ball of indeterminate fluff; a shopping lit you know you won’t stick to; an almost-empty lip gloss
Greetings, my tribe!
she’s selling her products in a low-key but really hi-key way. lol ALL celebs have done this on youtube or in magazines when they start their “brand” or become a “brand ambassador” or whatever. selena gomez recently did the same thing all over youtube promoting her new makeup line.
her fans know whats up. they’re definitely “hip” to whats going on.
LOL, loved the play by play.
That Febreze sponcon post seems like a spoof. I KNOW it’s not. I know that. But holy sh-t.
lol, agreed!
Geez, usually “what’s in my bag” content is a little less obvious than this.
I’ve not seen the Khloe episode of Home Edit. I like their organization, organizing soothes me, however I’m not a fan of the K’s, it’s not that I dislike them, I’m just whatever in regards to them. Bummer I’ll look for a new organization show lol
I found the episode with Khloe somewhat disappointing, her house is already so curated that it was more about showing off than organization. I don’t find the celebrity aspect of the show particularly interesting and weirdly the show has made me like the Hone Edit team less instead of more. It went from must binge to eh maybe later really quickly.
Even a classic Birkin bag can’t help save Kyle from her trashy fashion sense. She sure loves Lycra bodysuits and logo-everything.
This write up was absolutely HILARIOUS!!!! Much better than watching that listless, monotone infomercial for all things Kylie, SKIMS, Kendall and Kris Jenner. UGH