RHOBH’s Erika Jayne, 49, and Thomas Girardi, 81, split after 21 years together

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I’ve seen one episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills this last season after my friend Lisa suggested we watch it. It was the one where all the women went to Erika Jayne’s house to get astrology chart readings which end up pitting them against one another. Erika’s husband, Thomas Girardi, was in that episode and seemed absolutely ancient to me. He told a story about meeting John Wayne and I was like “holy sh-t how old is this guy?” It turns out that he’s 81 and that he’s been married to Erika for 21 years, which means she was about 28 and he was 60 when they met! She was serving him drinks at a restaurant, she slipped him her number and the rest is history. Thomas is a high-powered attorney and Erika has lived most of her adult life married to him. Now she’s about to get a taste of what it’s like to be on her own because she’s filed for divorce. They don’t have any kids together or a prenup, but given that they’re in California and have been married so long it might not matter anyway. Plus Erika has said that Thomas is a lawyer and would find ways around any prenup. Here’s the report from E!

“After much consideration, I have decided to end my marriage to Tom Girardi,” the reality star exclusively tells E! News, “This is not a step taken lightly or easily. I have great love and respect for Tom and for our years and the lives we built together.”

“It is my absolute wish to proceed through this process with respect and with the privacy that both Tom and I deserved,” she adds. “I request others give us that privacy as well.”

The couple married in 1999 after meeting at Chasen’s in West Hollywood, where Erika, 49, was serving cocktails and Tom, 81, was a frequent patron. “After a year of working in the restaurant, one night I decided to slip Tom my telephone number,” Erika wrote in her 2018 memoir, Pretty Mess. “We were standing in front of the giant fireplace. ‘Did you hear I was single?’ I asked.” Six months later, the two were engaged.

Throughout their relationship, Erika had been quick to shut down skeptics who questioned their 33-year age difference. “I’ve dealt with this forever: the younger woman that married the wealthier, older man,” she said on the Bravo show. “I mean, I’m tired of having to justify my 20-year marriage. Go get a 20-year marriage, then come f–king talk to me.”

Their two-decade romance was arguably unconventional, with Tom even refusing to wear a ring. “Tom said, ‘Listen, I’ll buy you anything you want. I don’t care what it is. You name it. But I’m not wearing a wedding band. I never have, I never will. I don’t like it. It’s uncomfortable. Please don’t ask me to,'” she wrote in her book. “A wedding band does not have magical powers. It is not going to stop anyone from doing something.”

Back in 2017, fans were shocked to hear Erika tell Andy Cohen she does not have a prenup. “Let me tell you something, let me be very clear. I’m married to a very powerful lawyer,” she admitted. “A prenup wouldn’t stand in his way anyway…It’s gonna be all Tom’s way, I assure you. He’ll rip that piece of paper to shreds in two seconds!”

[From E! Online]

I wonder if she waited to announce it until the election was overshadowing everything. That was somewhat smart, but we’re also so starved for any gossip now. As a casual observer of RHOBH, I’m surprised they’ve been married for so long. Erika seemed like a new-ish trophy wife to me. She certainly has the whole aesthetic down, but I suppose that could also be achieved with a couple of decades of practice.

Here’s a segment from RHOBH where Erika says her sex life is “ok.”

Here are Erika and Thomas talking about her music video for “Expensive.” It sounds like they spend a lot of time apart.

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photos credit: Avalon.red, Getty and via Instagram and YouTube

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17 Responses to “RHOBH’s Erika Jayne, 49, and Thomas Girardi, 81, split after 21 years together”

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  1. Guest with Cat says:

    I have no idea who these people are, but even in his 80’s he’s not hideous looking or anything, so maybe he was a hot 60? Lol. I dont know, but 20 years has to mean it was more than for the money. Good luck to them both. Whatever. I don’t care, just killing nerves waiting for a Biden-Harris victory. It’s looking good but after 2016 i dont trust anything.

    • rainbowkitty says:

      I was thinking the same thing. He’s not terrible looking. Also waiting on Biden to hit that 270.

      • Guest with Cat says:

        Apparently he looked the same at 60. I just looked them up. And he’s allegedly the one who was stepping out on her. But I have no idea how reliable the gossip sites are that had those headlines. I’m not actually into celebrity gossip, well at least I didn’t used to be. I found this site because I got interested Meghan Markle after she married Harry.

        As for the election, hang in there!

  2. Kalana says:

    How bad did it have to be to divorce an 80 year old or for the 80 year old to want a divorce?

    • Guest with Cat says:

      I did a quick lookup of them to see what the hell he looked like at 60. He looked basically the same! But there are some gossip headlines that HE is the one who’s been having an affair for the last 3 years.

      Sweet Savory Gravy! Who would have thought THAT?!!! 2020 just gets weirder and weirder.

  3. Rumer says:

    He is very charming and he treated her with respect, that goes a long way.

  4. JaneDoesWerk says:

    It was obvious they were living separate lives, but I loved them! I actually really like him, he seems way younger than 81 and is smart and funny and engaging and respectful. Maybe she just saw money, but I could very much see how easily anyone could fall in love with him.

  5. scollins says:

    There’s all kinds of marriages out there but theirs seem to have worked for them for many years. Could be the divorce is a money issue since I believe he has been sued, like maybe more than once and they don’t want both incomes raided. I admire her boldness and fashion is always interesting, sometimes a hit, sometimes not so much.

  6. HK9 says:

    Over the last year there were steady reports of Erika being generally unpleasant, when I’d never heard that before, so when the news broke I thought, hmmmm she was cranky because her life was falling apart.

    People say a lot of things, but I always got the impression that they both respected each other. I don’t think this is easy for either of them.

  7. Scotchy says:

    I think she is stepping away before the civil suits against Tom get out of hand and her assets get dragged into it. I wouldn’t be surprised if he even suggested it as he did appear to be a good man that loved her.

    • B says:

      @ Scotchy, agree with you. He has at least a couple of big lawsuits going on against him. He is an attorney, so possibly just a legal/financial move for both of them in order to evade future debt obligations and “give her a major payout” before the $ gets taken if he loses/a health situation arises before the cases are settled. A protective measure? (Just totally theorizing since I work for an estate planning atty, and think they genuinely llike/love each other, lol)

  8. Marie says:

    If you follow DeuxMoi on Instagram, it looks like they may have had some sort of arrangement. He’s been seen and photographed canoodling with other women, and she is supposedly hooking up with someone in the entertainment industry, too.

  9. bobafelty says:

    They’ve acted separated, living separate lives, for a couple seasons of the show. She has been trying to become a famous pop star singer for years, and he became increasingly annoyed about paying for her: expensive private jets to go sing at parties, her entourage that traveled with her, and the many outfits/music video shoots. But…she was upfront with him about what she expected from their relationship (paying for her music career), it jsut seems he just got tired of it.

    He is most famous as the law firm owner that hired Erin Brockovich (Julia Roberts) is the movie.

    • scollins says:

      How do you know these things? She did do very well for a few years with numerous top 10 dance chart hits.

  10. Granger says:

    I’m cynical but I can’t help thinking she’s dropping his ass because she doesn’t want to spend her 50s taking care of an ailing old man.

    Her comments about her 20-year marriage don’t mean much, in my opinion. Plenty of people stay married for YEARS even if they don’t really love the person anymore. She probably had enough time to herself, and obviously enough money, to put up with an old guy for a lot longer than she would have if he weren’t rich. Now she’s ready to move on. Just my opinion.

  11. Andrea says:

    I was waiting for this to come out. I am shocked. First off, he is having an affair on her? Wow. I suppose he fell out of love for her. This is sad because she seemed to have such love and respect for him.