It’s been one full week since the New York Times published the Duchess of Sussex’s op-ed, where she revealed that she had a miscarriage in July. Meghan wrote about the pain of miscarriage, and how the events of 2020 (both private and public) were a larger reminder that people should check in with each other, that people have private pain and we all need some compassion and understanding. Now sources are talking to People Magazine about why Meghan chose to write about what happened.
In Meghan Markle’s searingly honest essay about her recent miscarriage, she described the “unbearable grief” she and Prince Harry experienced. “I tried to imagine how we’d heal,” she wrote.
Today the couple is doing just that — and they hope that by sharing their story of pregnancy loss, they can help others who are struggling to feel less alone.
“They kept their miscarriage private for months because it was very painful and not anything that they knew if they would ever want to share,” a source tells PEOPLE in this week’s issue.
“They both seemed shocked at how painful it was. Meghan was ready to share now because so many women go through the same thing in silence,” the source adds.
The confessional op-ed was a departure from royal norms, which dictate minimal disclosures of private pain. And her decision to share her loss and encourage compassion has furthered the conversation around pregnancy loss.
“She talked about the taboo of miscarriage, says Ruth Bender Atik, national director of the Miscarriage Association in the U.K. “And I know that’s something that concerns a lot of people. And she talked about her feelings of both physical and emotional pain — for Harry too. It’s important to realize that partners are affected.”
As they share their grief they are also embracing joy. As Meghan, Harry and their 19-month-old son Archie prepared to celebrate their first Thanksgiving in America last week, they gathered vegetables from their garden to use in a meal they cooked at home in Montecito, California.
“They are doing well,” a friend tells PEOPLE. “They are in good health. They took the time off just to focus on family,” says the source, who adds that Meghan’s mom, Doria Ragland, visited over the holiday weekend, “which always makes Meghan happy.”
I think the public and royal reaction to Meghan’s op-ed would have been different if she had written it just days or weeks after her miscarriage over the summer. I’m not saying the reaction would have been better or worse, I just think it would have been different. I think that it was smart for her to take her time to really think about what she wanted to say and how she wanted to frame that information into a larger conversation about checking in with one another, about how difficult this year has been for so many people. This broke my heart: “They both seemed shocked at how painful it was.” *sob* 2020 has been a f–king year.
Photos courtesy of Backgrid, Avalon Red.