TikToker who outed Ben Affleck as a Raya creep claims she wasn’t making fun of him

Ben Affleck pictured picking up his favorite coffee delivery!

Ben Affleck went viral once again this week when a social media model named Nivine Jay posted a Tik Tok where she revealed that she once unmatched from Ben Affleck on the dating app Raya, and Ben had sent her some kind of creepy “it’s me” video as proof that he was who he said he was. Here’s the video again:

So, the first dozen times I watched the video, it got creepier and creepier. Like, Ben almost comes across as threatening. But Nivine wanted to correct the record on all of this. According to her, she unmatched Ben on Raya because she thought it was a fake profile and she was about to be catfished.

User Nivine Jay posted a hilarious video on Monday, May 3, explaining that they met on the elite celebrity dating app Raya—but she thought he was a catfish. “Thinking of the time I matched with Ben Affleck on raya and thought it was fake so I unmatched him and he sent me a video on instagram,” she wrote, along with four skull emojis. She added the viral song “Waking Up in the Morning” by Real Housewives of New Jersey star Gia Giudice over the clip.

Nivine, who played a sorority girl in Neighbors and is the author of the love story Cry Baby, then inserted the selfie video that Ben allegedly sent her after she rejected him. Fellow TikTok users were understandably shook by the story, with one writing, “girl u better bring that to all job interviews.”

Another commented, “The way he said ‘its me’ [sic] my soul would have left my body.” Nivine wrote back to share her own reaction to the mishap, saying, “Confirmed my soul did leave my body.” She captioned the video, “Sorry Ben.”

When contacted by E! News, Nivine said she meant no ill will toward Ben when posting the video.

“I’m seeing a lot of comments calling him a creep and l don’t think that’s fair. l wasn’t making fun of him in the video,” she explained. “l was making fun of myself for thinking he was a catfish and it was just supposed to be funny.”

[From E! News]

Yeah, I didn’t get that at all, that she was making fun of herself and NOT being shady to Ben. I think that even if her intention was to laugh at herself for her mistake, she still showed the world a video clip which Ben likely wanted to keep private. Plus, we now know that he’s regularly hitting up Raya (or was, at some point) and holding some kind of grudge when young women unmatch him. Hm. Also: she’s been holding onto the video for a reason, right? Let’s say this happened before he started up with Ana de Armas. He was hitting up ladies pre-pandemic and sending creepy videos to them in their Instagram DMs. And Nivine… held on to it. For more than a year. And used it in a Tik Tok. Messy.

Ben Affleck grabs packages that were delivered to his house while sipping his coffee

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

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70 Responses to “TikToker who outed Ben Affleck as a Raya creep claims she wasn’t making fun of him”

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  1. Izzy says:

    So a guy gets rejected and doesn’t want to take no for an answer. Celebrities: just like us!!

    • ME says:

      He’s probably not used to being rejected as many women would date him just because he’s rich and famous. That’s the problem. He thinks there’s no way a woman would/could say no to him.

    • caligirl says:

      She DIDN’T reject him though. She voluntarily ‘matched’ with him initially, which means she sent him a signal that she was interested in getting to know him. Then she unmatched with him just because she thought she was being fooled by a person who is not the real Ben Affleck. He wanted to clarify that it was him, in case that was the reason why she unmatched. Maybe he guessed that from previous experience. And he wasn’t wrong. He didn’t come across as pressed or entitled imo, but rather trying to be funny about it. Like this is the one situation where him being a celebrity and not a random guy makes all the difference.

      • claire says:

        If she thought his profile was fake, it’s his own fault. He went on tv and lied about being on Raya. He struggles with many things: fidelity, sobriety, basic honesty… lol I mean, he deserves what he gets

      • Vavavoom says:

        I agree! I don’t get all the ‘creepy’ talk about this video. come ON people. Fishing for something that isn’t there.
        Also, she’s an idiot to post this. Good luck on RAYA now, girl.

      • chickenwings says:

        @claire This was somewhere in october/november 2019. That was they only time Ben has been on Raya. And he actually tweeted around that time (29 october) admitting that he was there and gave a shot out to Raya while promoting a charity, in response to the rumors. That interview he gave where he denied that he was on the app was in March 2020 and he was already off the app by that time and probably had already began dating Ana. So, no that wasn’t the reason why she must have thought it wasn’t him. Quite the opposite.

  2. smcollins says:

    This is better than the JLo reunion and the Brad Pitt/married instamodel stories combined. *This* is the fun kind of celeb stories that I love reading about, and Ben never fails to deliver 😆

    • MerlinsMom1018 says:

      Which brings me to: Say!! Whatever happened to Brad’s married girlfriend??? SHE fell off the radar pretty quick

    • SarahCS says:

      Agreed, give us some basic fun gossip please celebrities! We need you.

  3. Eleonor says:

    I find all of this gross.

  4. Liz version 700 says:

    Dude no matter what her intent was, he looks creepy as hell. Boundaries do not exist in Ben land

  5. Devs says:

    he’s so incredibly sleazy, manipulative and creepy.
    i can’t believe how much people let him get away with lol
    he’s not even (formerly) hot like brad deadbeat and johnny debt to “justify” how much people protect and excuse him
    i guess it’s just enough that he’s a white man.
    i personally am all for young women laughing at gross old men who hit on them. even if they’re doing it for attention. even if they’re being messy.
    oh and lots of people save videos for years lol, it’s a very normal thing to do. she probably decided to leave it till he was single because it would look worse if she posted it when he was with his other too young girlfriend

    • Oliphant says:

      Absolutely agree, people seem to be falling over themselves to defend him.

      • LNS says:

        It’s largely just two posters who are writing defense essays, who could be the same person tbh. (The same former Batman, Dunking-obsessed person…)

    • Alissa says:

      she wasn’t laughing at him though. that “waking up in the morning, thinking about so many things” song is part of a meme where you play it and then follow up with a video where you did something stupid or embarrassing. she’s making fun of herself, just like she said.

  6. Tanesha86 says:

    I’m sorry y’all but I didn’t find this creepy at all. With all the shenanigans people pull on the internet seems he just wanted to prove to her he wasn’t a catfish. Nothing to see here 🤷🏾‍♀️

    • LaUnicaAngelina says:

      I’m in the minority here with you. I didn’t find it creepy and I consider myself very intuitive when it comes to creeper vibes.

      • Makaila says:

        I agree. I think it’s kind of charming and he has a little bit of a smile. I think it’s innocent and just flirty. What i’m more concerned with is that she made a private video public and also how ridiculous she made her facial features. :(

      • Ari says:

        I agree, I didn’t find it creepy at all and it was kinda funny like he just wanted to confirm that it was him and she seemed very humbled about it and the whole thing is just funny

      • Jenn says:

        Same. Not creepy, he’s just a cringey doofus. Which is oddly down-to-earth, actually.

    • ItReallyIsYouNotMe says:

      I didn’t comment yesterday but I thought this too. It seems like maybe she responded to the connection with her own message along the lines of “Nope, this is a fake” which is why he would have done a video being like”It’s me” as in “It really is me.” I didn’t get creeper or arrogant vibes from this message – I got a vibe like he thought it was funny and if the video was a few seconds longer we would have seen a smile.

      Anyway, there are lots of problematic things about Ben, but this isn’t one of them.

    • Alissa says:

      I agree. it’s not creepy at all to me. it just seems like, especially on this site, people don’t like Ben so no matter what he does they make a bigger deal out of it. she clearly didn’t think it was creepy. the whole thing was supposed to be funny.

    • Ohreally says:

      I would agree with you, except he went to an entirely different social media platform and searched for her THEN sent that message. I don’t know how dating platforms work, but it’s a bit much. If he wasn’t famous (he also publicly fondled an MTV VJ’s breasts on live TV so…. he’s not as abusive as his brother, but creepy he most certainly is) then this would be viewed as annoying and desperate as it was. If a woman did the same thing she’d be dragged. Ben will still be just fine.

      • icequeen says:

        People on Raya are required to have an Instagram link as part of their profile. It’s an interactive app. So he didn’t go and search for her. It was right there in her profile. And she didn’t provide any context as to what lead to him to send the video. She didn’t even say he initiated the conversation. Maybe they were already texting and she said ‘no way, I don’t believe it’s you…”. So he sent the video as confirmation.

        And how about we don’t judge people for things we haven’t seen proof of or that they allegedly did a lifetime ago. I’ve watched the video with Hilarie Burton and all it shows is him giving her a hug. She’s entitled to share her story the way she thinks it went but it is also possible he was being clumsy while giving the hug and she mistook it for something else. And he apologized anyway. No need to drag this to infinity to judge his character in the present day. It’s been 20 years. People grow and change.

        I think it would be the opposite btw if this was a woman. They would be judging the person shamelessly using this for clout by violating his privacy instead. He’s being judged by some just because he’s a middle-aged man and she’s a younger woman. All he did was confirm his identity which several people who are part of the app have said it’s extremely common practice for people there, especially celebrities to avoid fake profiles. That’s it. He didn’t harass or threaten her, he didn’t send her inappropriate messages or pictures. He actually sounded funny and was lowkey smiling and not that concerned about it at all.

      • Darla says:

        @icequeen, nah. I saw the video, he honked her, it was clear. Now I wonder if you aren’t pr.

      • robbie says:

        Giving Hilarie Burton a hug? No. Stop. He grabbed her breast. He would be furious if some man did that to one of his daughters. It’s actually disturbing what you’ve posted about it. What he did was assault.

      • teecee says:

        @icequeen

        STOP. We all saw it, Hilarie told us what happened, believe women.

        And it’s not the only time he’s done this. He groped Annamarie Tendler (John Mulaney’s wife) and a woman comedy writer at an Emmys party. This is a pattern.

        BELIEVE WOMEN

    • BK says:

      Same. He was being funny. People really have spent too much time indoors and not socializing….

    • Lawcatb says:

      I don’t think it’s creepy, I thought it was douchey. The dating app version of “Don’t you know who I am?!”

    • MissMarirose says:

      I’m with you. I didn’t find it creepy at all. I imagine that celebrities come across that disbelief that they are who they say they are, quite a bit. So, why not post a video proving he’s not a catfish?
      I wonder if the woman’s choice of song plays into people’s perception here. It’s a downbeat tune with an odd vibe. Overlay the Benny Hill theme song instead and see if anyone thinks it’s creepy. lol

    • PrincessMe says:

      Same here – I thought he was just saying “I’m not a catfish”. I was wondering if I was some kind of weirdo not thinking it’s creepy.

  7. Maria says:

    These senior hunks, Pitt- Affleck, need to pay more attention to the new generation of ladies. I kinda enjoy with the fresh air of the Nivines and the mrs Nico Marys. Cheers, girl

    • ab says:

      “senior hunks” made me laugh! it’s true though, if they’re going to keep chasing these gen z’ers they need to ask their kids how to play the game lol

  8. Darla says:

    I thought it was funny, not creepy. I find Ben and his hijinks hilarious. I often wonder if Evans’ PR team shut his early stuff down by pointing to Ben and saying “do you want to be that?” Two Boston bros whom I suspect have a lot in common behavior wise, but Ben is the one who always gets caught. I can’t help laughing, I’m sorry.

  9. whateveryousay says:

    I think Lainey pointed out yesterday this video happened before he got with Anna because of his haircut and what he looked like at at the time. So yeah she held onto this for more than a year? And the idea was for her to be making fun of herself? Sure girl. I don’t buy it. Either way he’s sad for it and she’s sad for doing this hoping it would get her some fame.

  10. Willow says:

    She’s using him for attention, but considering how disgusting and gross men like him were when I was a waitress in college…they would come in for 40 cups of free coffee, leave a 2 cent tip, make flirty remarks and get mad when you weren’t interested. At least take a shower before you try to overcome a 20 year age difference with pennies.
    Tik Tok revenge is my favorite new thing.

    • brenda says:

      Yeah, don’t send some stranger on the internet DMs, pics, or videos that you wouldn’t want the whole internet to see. He’s dumb.

  11. Jainey says:

    I really don’t see it as creepy. It’s funny.

  12. Alissa says:

    honestly, if you didn’t get that she was making fun of herself, it’s because you’re not regularly on Tik Tok and didn’t understand the meme she was using. it was pretty obvious that she was making fun of herself for thinking it wasn’t him. and his video was meant to be funny too. this whole “it’s so creepy” thing is honestly annoying. 🙄

    that meme is pretty new, too, so I would imagine that’s why she didn’t use it until now.

    • Pork chops & Apple sauce says:

      The recording of Affleck shows he weighs more than he has in quite a while. He’s been getting slimmed down big time since 2020.

  13. Marigold says:

    I don’t get the big deal. She thought it wasn’t him. He said it was. It’s not like he showed a dic pick

  14. icequeen says:

    She’s right. He’s not the creep. It’s HER. And she didn’t do it to out him, because he did nothing wrong and even that girl knows it. The theme she was using on tik tok btw is when someone has regret about doing something and she was basically expressing regret about having mistakenly unmatched him. But it’s very clear she actually did it for the clout and there’s no justification. This ET reporter is on Raya and she said that it’s extremely common for especially famous people in the app to send videos to prove their identities “like hey, it’s really me” to avoid catfishing, they even mention their phone numbers. It happens all the time and is within the rules of the app. What is absolutely against the rules of the community and totally unacceptable behaviour is to out people for being there. She proceeds to heavily critize her for basically being a stupid and sleazy clout chaser and calls her ghetto.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=es0TgY_x9wA

    She also explains that people match themselves, you are not matched, so that is a consideration there. The app didn’t match her with Ben, she matched herself and then unmatched because as she herself claimed, she thought he wasn’t the real Ben. So, he was correct to question whether that was the reason and he was right.

    The reporter also explains that people choose the age range within which they want to date and Ben had to have been part of her choices. That woman is 32 years old btw. Not some naive super young girl. Also, people in the app are required to link their Instagram on their profile. It’s essentially like an alternate mean of communication. Because some people were saying he found her and stalked her on Insta and bla bla bla. Which is not true. And finally, how does anyone watch that video and doesn’t think he’s just being funny about the whole thing is beyond me. My guess is they’re projecting their own condescending tendencies. People have lost their marbles trying to put people down celebrities for doing nothing but being normal.

    • FHMom says:

      So I guess this means that she was okay with dating a 50 something year old guy if he was famous? I don’t think this makes either one of them look good. I mean, wtf was he doing trolling for women on a dating site? And she is looking for a step up to get known? Well, then, I guess she got what she wanted.

      • MissMarirose says:

        “wtf was he doing trolling for women on a dating site?”

        umm … that’s literally what you’re supposed to do on a dating site.

      • GA says:

        Completely separate to the “is Ben gross” discussion, I’m confused with all the dating site shaming in this and the original post, sure a lot of people use them for hook ups, but more people use them to actually meet people? All the guys I met at bars were aholes (surprise surprise), and I didn’t fancy getting involved with someone in my friendship group (been there done that) or work (don’t sht where you eat).

        The “new” wave of dating apps have been common for almost 10 years and it is many of my friends’ preferred method of meeting someone new (we are 30ish). I met my partner on an app and we’ve been together almost 6 years. Many of my other friends have been in long term relationships stemming from apps. My cousin has been married to his wife (who he met on Tinder) for 4 years. There are cons, but not more than meeting people via “traditional” methods.

    • MissMarirose says:

      Thanks for this info. The context is really important to understanding what was going on in her video.

    • LNS says:

      It’s hypocritical of you to accuse others of “losing their marbles” considering the lengths you’re going to do defend Ben Affleck on here (and elsewhere) over this. Look in the mirror, dude. Where are your marbles? Have you seen them lately?

    • robbie says:

      What’s wrong with you?

    • brenda says:

      She’s 29. Which is what the news sites have been reporting.

    • Jenn says:

      @icequeen I, for one, really appreciate the insider insights into how Raya functions as a platform, so thank you for that!! 🙏

  15. Marie says:

    I legit thought that header pic was Don Tr*mp, Jr. Sorry, Batfleck.

  16. LNS says:

    If Ben Affleck wanted you so badly that he recorded a message like that and sent it to you… you’d hang onto it, too. Probably forever. It’s hilarious that he got *that* bothered when she unmatched him. I bet he doesn’t get rejected much, if ever. Garner is his permanent doormat — he prob thinks all women regard him the same way.

  17. ME says:

    It’s just funny he thinks no woman could ever not be interested in him. It had to be because she thought he was someone pretending to be him, because why on earth wouldn’t ANY woman want Ben Affleck? He’s so full of himself.

  18. Carolnr says:

    That song in that video is beyond annoying!
    This is not a good look for his image…sadly, Ben hasn’t realized yet the power& permanence of the internet & the impact his actions have on his children…

  19. brenda says:

    This narcissistic person has a lengthy history of showing how he feels entitled to women: touching their bodies without invitation and now stalking them across apps and sending unwanted videos after being rejected. It might have been funny if he weren’t a known offender. As it stands, he’s just pathetic. She is two decades younger than he is. This is his type, huh? It’s more and more clear why he and Garner didn’t work out. She’s way too old and too frumpy. Again, wouldn’t be an issue except that he has these kids who will see his antics on the internet… his problem, I guess. If he doesn’t care, why should anyone else?

  20. Ornamental says:

    …In the end, it’s all just SO sad.
    Because – they are clearly PERFECT for each other.
    And, it seems very possible that her head is so far up her own cosmetically-enhanced a$$, that she truly didn’t think she was poking fun at him. …Again, perfectly compatible levels of vanity on display here!

  21. jferber says:

    I thought he was dating Jennifer Lopez again! Could he be the same man who slept with strippers at his bachelor’s party right before the wedding with JLo? Yes, he’s exactly the same man. Nivine and Jennifer: look elsewhere for a real man and not an entitled user. And yes, he SHOULD be make fun of, why the hell not?

  22. Jayna says:

    Comedian Nikki Glaser mentioned being on Raya and brought up Ben Affleck on Conan O’Brien in March of 2020.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wv1_z9vpklE

  23. eliza james says:

    He. Is. So. Gross.
    She. Is. So. Thirsty.

  24. Justjj says:

    I am just an ordinary peasant and I would straight reject him too.

  25. Pork chops & Apple sauce says:

    I must admit that at first, I felt as if it was one of those DeepFace deals like in that fake Tom Cruise recording. Are we still 100% sure it wasn’t?

  26. Louis says:

    He looks so foolish that his QAnon Stans are now trying to say it was a deepfake. Truly pathetic.

  27. Veronica S. says:

    I didn’t think it was creepy, personally, as much as maybe…hmm, worded a bit in a slightly narcissistic way. It’s more ridiculous to me in terms of him going after a woman that young, and then I checked and found out she was thirtyish, so not even that bad. It’s just more that he just can’t help making a fool of himself lol.

  28. Call_me_al says:

    This is a fun post, but Ben’s really not being creepy imo.

  29. Sandra M says:

    For a couple that wanted privacy, they asure are acting opposite. And now she’s also a writer? Lol

  30. Sandra M says:

    For a couple that wanted privacy, they asure are acting opposite. And now she’s also a writer? Lol