If you couldn’t tell by now, the crumbling House of Windsor has been in a full-blown panic for months. They stagger from self-made crisis to self-made crisis. They are being sabotaged from within, because they’re all so lazy, tone deaf and moronic. They needed people to come in and act as crisis managers just to get them to stop telling everyone that they are incandescent with rage. Their clown makeup has been dripping off because of all of their flop sweat for months. It’s amazing. Currently, the Windsors are dealing with two crises: their completely contrived and phoned-in bullsh-t about Prince Harry’s Armchair Expert interview, and the upcoming and still unknown crisis of Harry’s The Me You Can’t See docuseries on AppleTV+. Please allow “sources” to tell us, via Page Six, that Harry is going to attack his family yet again, and that William is very worried but he’s too elegant to say anything. I sh-t you not.
Prince Harry is set to drop more “truth bombs” in his new mental health series with Oprah Winfrey, Page Six is told. The Duke of Sussex has teamed up with Winfrey for “The Me You Can’t See,” which premieres on Apple TV+ on Friday.
One insider told us: “One of the episodes is very personal … deeply.”
Last week, Harry, 36, told Dax Shepard on his podcast how his father, Prince Charles, had passed on a cycle of “genetic pain” following his own troubled childhood. He had previously told Winfrey that his father and brother, Prince William, were “trapped” in their roles.
While upset, royal sources who know William and his wife, Kate Middleton, told us he is being supported by his wife’s large family, adding: “William is dreadfully hurt, he’s an elegant man who lives for his job, his country and his family.”
The way I screamed when I got to “William is dreadfully hurt, he’s an elegant man who lives for his job, his country and his family.” *chef’s kiss* Well done, crisis managers. A-plus messaging, you f–king dolts. After spending months punching walls, screaming into pillows and throwing tantrums to anyone who would listen, suddenly The Other Brother is too elegant, too hard-working, too dedicated to dear old England. At least *someone* finally realized that it’s a bad look for the future future king to be permanently engorged with rage. But come on, who the f–k is buying the “William is terribly hurt and elegant” PR?
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red.
I needed a laugh this morning after stepping in cat vomit with no shoes on and that headline provided one, ty Kaiser.
My sympathies, @MonicaQ. #beentheredonethat
Nothing like that skidding through vomit (dog, in my case) while in a suit, and dealing with a incomplete project for a first grader.
I took a mental health day after that experience-sounds like you’re coping better than me.
You made me laugh, HufflepuffLizLemon.
Oh my god, I would’ve called off the rest of the week! LOL
I see your dog vomit and raise you dog diarrhea while I was barefoot and pregnant. The understanding of what I stepped in followed by morning sickness…. was a moment never to forget.
Esma wins this contest, hands (foot?) down! 😂
Esma wins this contest, hands (foot?) down! 😂
Been there!
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again…BRAVA for the choice of accompanying photos of Dull Bill. The dainty watering can (dare I say, “elegant”?) is perfection.
OMG. I agree! The choice of photos is priceless. He is the pinnacle of an entitled bro and the open mouth shots….😂😂😂😂
The photos are stupendous!!!
Agreed! And today is one of those days I wish we could post photos in our replies— there are quite a few of William out there that are…inelegant
LOL I can’t
Right?? I keep trying to think of a comment but I’m laughing. It sounds like the title of a novel! “An Elegant Man”
‘Elegant Bill’
Now if he can only right-size his pants, solve the climate crisis and racism in soccer, I will give him a cookie
For someone too elegant to comment, he seems to be doing a lot of commenting.
True.
Reminds me of that writer’s tip: show, don’t tell
Face on him like a slapped arse.
Yep, those crisis managers read Celebitchy and told Bill that rage monster is not a nice title to have. Now he is an “elegant man”. This is hilarious.
Elegant is such an odd word to choose. Maybe it’s because rose bush trimming is such an elegant hobby for the future future king?
I think I’ve figured it out. Either Carole Middleton (credit Kalana), or someone at Page Six, has just learned that you’re not supposed to call people ‘classy,’ and that ‘elegant’ is *typically* the favored synonym. Following this premise, if you go on to swap those words out, the message suddenly becomes coherent. Uncouth and untrue, but coherent.
Page Six is Carole Middleton -note how the Middletons were shoved in there “royal sources who know William and his wife, Kate Middleton, told us he is being supported by his wife’s large family.” I guess Carole thinks William is elegant while he eats her cheese toast.
With his head on her lap shudder
Lauren, I hope that twitter doesn’t start putting PW and elegant in the same sentence. No reason to amplify that message.
I’m not even gonna touch the “elegant man” PR bullshit from the palace, I’m too busy cackling over your choice of pictures for the article! For a guy who was once the hottest most eligible bachelor in the world, Prince William has really had a glow-down.
Oh yeah, I remember when he was the supposed “cute” one out of him and Harry. My how the turn tables.
Right? Everyone had a crush on William, and Harry was the goofy younger brother. Not so much anymore.
Either am blind or psychic, but I’ve always thought Harry was better-looking than William, even when they were babies. Something about William’s mouth is very off-putting.
If you need to keep telling everyone you’re king (or king to be), you don’t really have any power.
Learned that from Tywin Lannister.
Yes Ariel I had the exact same thought, stop telling on yourself. I think going quiet and quietly about your business has got to be a better choice than all these desperate sounding cringe worthy pieces
I LOVE the watering can picture. So elegant.
The choice of pictures for the “elegant man” explains it all.
I’m trying to find the words, but I just keep giggling at the phrasing. Elegant man? WTF does that mean? Elegant men aren’t incandescent with rage. Elegant men don’t attempt to sabotage and abuse their younger sibling for years. Elegant men don’t attempt to run a suicidal, pregnant woman out of the country for the offense of being black and competent. Elegant men don’t screw their neighbor’s wives while his wife is pregnant with his 3rd child. Tell me again, all-knowing PR gurus what an elegant man, like William, won’t do.
I cannot wrap my head around the term. This just tells you that PWT knows exactly how awful he was towards Meghan and fears the fallout if all were revealed. That’s why the preemptive PR. I feel sorry for his PR managers. No access to Harry and what’s coming. No leaks from the Harry and Meghan camp. What sweet karma.
I’m sure the “stiff upper lip” and “dignified” set are buying it.
The rest of us just rolled our eyes into the back of our heads.
I think these crisis managers are trying to paint the royal family as silently dignified and stoic. In contrast to what they perceive in Harry as being “woke” and messy.
I think this is what’s going on. They’re trying to reinforce the image of the silent and stoic royal family against Harry spilling all the beans etc. (Harry’s not doing that but you know the BM).
“Silent and stoic” can come across as cold and remote too. And people in the US appreciate vulnerability as long as its not a life long pity party.
Bill is elegant!!!! I’m cackling in the kitchen, again. Is incandescent with laughter a thing
Incandescent with rage is the new male elegance. Maybe he is often also incandescent with elegance
We sure do hear a lot about how william feels for a man who is supposedly too elegant to talk about his grievances in public.
He’s already an uncle! So elegant. Regal, even
That comment alone should be convincing enough that he was the one who made the skin color comments about Archie. He didn’t even follow up the uncle comment with something like “but I’m so happy for Harry and Meghan and can’t wait for the baby to arrive.” Nasty person.
Elegant is not a word I would use to describe William – even if I was trying to embiggen him.
My brain did a record scratch at “elegant.” Love the choice of photos, but has he ever had an elegant photo? His various looks seem to be – smelled something bad, brain hurting while trying to figure something out, breathing through his mouth, grinding his molars with rage, about to say something embarrassing, just said something embarrassing…
Oh, let’s not forget the ominously emotionless stare of a would-be dictator (complete with the military cosplay).
Nothing says elegance more than the image of a FFK with his head on his mother-in-law’s lap. Carole’s back to the story telling prowl.
Exactly. “being supported by his wife’s large family”.
Thinking of changing my handle on here to Elegant Man complete with watering can photo. It’s just too good! Haha.
LOL
It would make a pretty funny meme. We could make it start trending on Twitter. Someone make this happen!
The tiny pink rose-watering can is his penis. See how elegantly he displays it.
Good Lord. Where did they pull ‘elegant’ from? Is there a courtier who’s hard of hearing and misinterpreted what they overheard?
“That William is very egghead”?
or
“He wants to fertilise Rose’s eggandhecan’t”?
or
“He walks like he’s an elephant”?
I mean the above are more likely. These people are insane.
“He wants to fertilise Rose’s eggandhecan’t”?
I AM DYING!!! 😀
Elegant Bill and Keen Guevara. What a pair.
lolz. it’s so funny. his job is to be this right wing british symbol to keep england together but he can barely give a speech. he isn’t particularly inspiring, even to people who are sympathetic to him. they need to find him something to talk about that actually interests him so he can have some type of presence.
protect his family – from what, the rosebushes?
New nickname -elegant man. I will never not try to make “elegant man” happen.
Was he elegant when caught dad-dancing with random blondes while his pregnant wife was at home with supposed HG? Elegant is the last word I’d use to describe this tool. Lazy, spoiled, tone deaf, racist, entitled, shallow – yes. Elegant – no way!
“Elegant” is the most bizarre word I can think of to describe Boring Bill. I mean WTF?
(But now we can call him His Elegancy FFK Boringly Dull Bill of Cambridge. Too wordy??? 😂)
Deleted. Responded to wrong post.
How about His Royal Elegantness FFK Baldimort the Incandescent of Cantbridge, or Walmart the Elegant, Duke of Lamebridge, His Elegancy TOB of Bucklebury Palace…
The possibilities are endless and … elegant! 😎
@Nanea I second this. 😂
He sure looked elegant on that balance beam two inches above the ground, surrounded by folks trying to keep him from falling off.
Incandescently elegant sexiest balding dad dancer rosebush trimmer alive.
You know, that might very well be true. Or, it would be if he were on, say, Mars. By himself.
And at Philip’s funeral wearing floods (ie. poorly tailored trousers).
He reminds me of a middle age slacker just waiting for someone to die so he can rule the world. That is the real William in a nutshell. So pathetic and such a waste.
“He is being supported by his wife’s large family” – oh hi Carole 👋
How disrespectful to the Windsors, who must be really hurt by the idea that Willegance has to go to the Middleton family for support.
What an insult to the queen, prince charles, and the royal family. 😉
Also no mention of the price william’s home(s) and the number of bathrooms? Quelle surprise.
And “large family” isn’t really how I would describe a family with only 3 kids, even if we include Pippa’s spouse and 2 kids, so I’m wondering if they’re specifically trying to get us to think about Kate’s extended family, here. As in, uncle Gary. Is this a nod of support towards uncle Gary and all the insane anti-Sussex, pro-Kate, “we should skip Charles” crap he’s been spewing lately? I’m surprised that this obvious Middleton Propaganda PR Company (TM) piece didn’t go on to list every single Middleton member by name like that other recent even more obvious Middleton Propaganda PR Co piece did.
Yup. The Middletons have been going whole hog for William lately. Problems at the pot farm?
My stomach turned completely over when I read that. And then I saw the picture of him holding the watering can. Yikes. Elegant, sure, “There’s a Uber driver out there being frisked as we speak.” “How dark will Meghan’s baby be.” Keep it up, KP. You suck. Princess Michael is more elegant than William!
I don’t think this is from the new PR team. No way would they be talking up Kate’s “large and supportive family” b.s. Plus this is Page Six, the Middleton US press corps. But wow, that “elegant man” thing is definitely not the phrase to use to resonate with people here in the US.
I really wonder what the conversations are…the new PR peeps are trying to stay on message and then they read about William’s elegance in page 6. Do they go to William and say WTF or to Kate and then do they both pretend they have no idea who this source is. Or do they all just stay silent and stoic while the crisis managers seriously side eye them while plotting their resignation. “Page 6? What’s page 6” says Carole.
Elegant like a fly on poop. Could this be more delusional. Probably just the media hyping him up, don’t you think? (Like he told first responders the media did with covid).
The crisis managers are changing the messaging but they are still operating out of the same tired, tone deaf playbook. They frame everything about William around Harry. They can’t define him at all without Harry. It’s a self defeating approach.
This is the first headline on this site that made me truly LOL. Please tell me elegant will now be in the rotation along with keen, engorged with rage, incandescent, tending to rose bushes, and whatever else we use to typically describe William. The watering can photo is legendary but I got quite a giggle out of the picture with William holding Guinness.
There’s nothing elegant about this man William. Hello…
One man’s elegant is another man’s fuddy-duddy.
Goodness!! They really desperate. I hope a lot of people see through this sad, mess of a pr. I don’t buy it.
I didn’t know that we were naming racist elegant these days.
But he’s an elegant racist, okay. He only says racist things while speaking in a very elegant and posh voice.
Unbelievable. Prince William was once dubbed by Daily Mail as “the most reluctant and the most truculent of royal”
“Palace source” must be CarolE. “While upset, royal sources who know William and his wife, Kate Middleton, told us he is being supported by his wife’s large family,” NOT being supported by the rest of his royal relatives. One could make the point that William and CarolE are down low admitting his family isn’t very supportive at all.
Also his cute days are behind him now that he no longer has all that glorious hair to hide behind. He’s developed a permanent sneer on his face, even when he tries to smile.
He looks 60 years old in that picture with the little pink watering pot.
My first thought was “Is that Prince Philip?”
Re: the word elegant– it’s not that odd. Charles is elegant (despite tampongate). Will is trying to usurp Chuck. And reminding Chuck that Kate’s fam will do his PR bidding.
🤮🤮🤮
The commentary on this post is HIGH QUALITY. Thank you Kaiser and the Celebitches!
Unfortunately this Crisis factory you mention isn’t really a thing in the UK. There is no crisis as far as MSM are concerned and tbh I’m sure most of the British public feel indifferent. We have way more important things to worry about and tbh all most people care about right now is whether they can go on holiday this summer. I think this is getting blown out of all proportion.
Of course it isn’t real, but it is fun! This place would dry up without the Cambridge’s to mock.
It’s a nice diversion with all going on in the world today.
It is real enough that Charles and William have each hired their own crisis managers so clearly they aren’t as confident as you are about how they are being perceived in the UK and the rest of the world.
Pink, oh I agree. Perhaps you could whisper into the ears of the editors of the BMs and ask them to start really addressing the issues which are important. Using H&M to disguise their inability to address the important issues should be the topic of conversation in the UK. Perhaps the BM would start writing about what people want to read–as long as they would report facts. As an American, I find the drama they create telling. Disinformation is lucrative; I just have to look at Faux News and other right-wing and white supremacist news media to know that. Fortunately, we have a large credible media here. I think it’s up to the people in UK to change the quality of the media available to them. In the meantime, don’t blame us for finding the drama amusing. When they use the drama to harm, don’t expect us to be silent. And, Page Six is not credible media.
He is so dedicated to his family, country and what was the other thing.? That he appears to have gone on a solo vacation judging by the fact that he looks sunburned and she doesn’t. The only thing this elegant jackass I’d dedicate to is his ego
If this is the work of the new “Crisis Managers” I’m astonished at how puerile and silly it sounds. First, there is nothing elegant about this gormless man-child. Second, lives for what job? He’s basically nothing but a work-shirker. Third, he treats his wife like sh*t on a shoe and doesn’t seem to spend much time with the kids.
We’re not stupid here at CB…we see right through this vapid BS and I hope the “Crisis Managers”, KP, BP and CH are ALL reading this. Oh, and the Midds too – we see your dirty fingers all over this CarolE.
Remember, the crises managers work for the royals, not the other way around. The only thing they are brought in fir is to soften the edges and change perception. Perception, not what they actually do or how they operate. That’s it.
I imagine the KP secretaries and RR’s talking to William like Smithers to Mr. Burns (who William resembles in more ways than one): “These articles will help people get to know the real you – virtuous, heroic, nubile…”
Elegant must be code for something.
No lie, that’s the kind of claptrap I used to use to talk someone with mental illness off a figurative ledge. Not truthful, but plausible, and something I could talk them into believing. This has that ring to it.
I think Harry spoke of Generational Trauma not “genetic pain”. What is genetic pain? Mental Health experts do not appear to have been consulted.
Funny, elegance never comes to mind when I see or hear about this man. I generally think of him as engorged. Engorged with rage, engorged with lust (not for his wife), engorged with ambition (to be the king immediately after Queen Elizabeth dies) and engorged with ego (I exist. Be happy. All is right with the world. Adore me.) So yes, engorged and not elegant and those are VERY different E words. Carry on.
None of the left over senior royals are elegant. The queen in her day had her moments but that’s it.
I do not think that word means what they think it means.
According to Merriam-Webster:
el·e·gance | \ ˈe-li-gən(t)s
Definition of elegance
1a : refined grace or dignified propriety : urbanity
b : tasteful richness of design or ornamentation the sumptuous elegance of the furnishings
c : dignified gracefulness or restrained beauty of style : polish the essay is marked by lucidity, wit, and elegance
d : scientific precision, neatness, and simplicity the elegance of a mathematical proof
Is it possible to be both elegant and terribly insecure? I always associate elegance with a sense of confidence. Who would William be if he weren’t the heir to the throne?
strange , since i am not english speaking from birth . do people really describe a male as elegant? don’t think i have ever in my life seen anyone describe a male as elegant.
I think it was meant as he’s above it all and too classy to engage in talk of Harry. Elegant is not commonly used to describe a man in this context.
Billy Porter however is an elegant man, speaks eloquently and exudes class.
William is brutish and unsophisticated.
I would consider Tim Gunn as elegant perhaps.
What job?
I think they’ve mixed up the two brothers 😬
If this is what the crisis PR peeps are coming up with, they shouldn’t have quit their last jobs. If this is happening in spite of them, they need to put their foot down and issue the dictate: knock this crap off or we are out the door, because this does NOT reflect well.
Lol all day and night. Who thought this would work? It’s like they’re picking adjectives out of a hat.
Elegant? Even people who don’t care about the monarchy (99% of us Brits) don’t think he’s elegant. We think he’s a baldy twat and not much else.
William + elegant = Balderdash
at one event he was holding a pink watering can , at another event he was holding a yellow watering can , and now they calling him elegant William, . what is going on, are trying to tell the public that William is bisexual. ? and then they took pics to show he is lifting weights with the muscle on his arm. when anywhere you go to get the vax they tell you to wear a t shirt.
I guffawed rather inelegantly at the article title.
Lacey said the elegant man went into a tirade against his father with Camilla watching. The elegant man also wanted his brother OUT and wanted to break up his brother and his wife.
I wonder if anyone has suggested (not being sarcastic here) that William might benefit from therapy?
It just gets sillier and sillier.