Octavia Spencer apologized to Britney privately for telling her to get a prenup


Last weekend, Britney Spears got engaged to Sam Asghari. So many people were genuinely happy for her, and social media exploded with felicitations and well-wishes. As Kaiser reported, on Britney’s post, Octavia Spencer left a comment that stood out, “Make him sign a prenup.” I thought it was a riot. It was such a timely and referential joke with the conservatorship and Britney taking back control of her life. When I read Sam’s tongue-in-cheek response about there being a prenup to protect his “jeep and shoe collection,” I figured the couple got the joke and we were all enjoying the moment together. As usual, I was wrong. There must have been some form of backlash towards Octavia. She issued an apology both privately and publicly to the couple. Octavia posted a beautiful photo of Britney and Sam to her IG and a caption letting everyone know she’d never intended to do anything other than make them laugh. This was her full caption:

Y’all, a few days ago Sam and Britney announced their engagement and me being me I made a joke. My intention was to make them laugh not cause pain. I’ve reached out to this lovely couple privately to apologize and now want to restore just a smidge of happiness they were robbed of. Britney’s fans have seen her through a lot of pain and she’s found happiness. We’re thrilled for her. So let’s show them love. 👇🏽 #nonegativity

[From Octavia Spencer’s Instagram via Hollywood Life]

It’s possible Octavia simply had her own second thoughts about the joke. I think I remember a few comments here that speculated Britney’s social media break was because of the prenup talk. Maybe Octavia saw the comments from fans and wanted to make sure Britney knew it was a joke. I don’t think this was motivated from Britney’s team. In addition to Sam’s joke at the time, he responded to Octavia’s apology with, “You are very kind to clarify but i have no hard feelings whatsoever. Jokes and misconceptions come with the territory.” If Octavia felt she needed to do this, then I’m glad she did. I’m constantly making jokes that land wrong and I feel horrible. I think my twitter deletes are longer than my actual tweets. I felt really bad for both women when Octavia wrote “and now want to restore just a smidge of happiness they were robbed.” I would be crushed if I thought/knew I’d robbed Britney of any happiness in this moment.

The important part is someone felt the joke crossed a line and Octavia made her apologies. She made them quickly, not years from now when they were dug up. She made it when she felt her words had done damage, even if unintentional. She also did not blame someone else for her miscalculation. And, she actually did apologize, not just suggest she was going to do it someday like some other celebrities. I’m happy that Britney is engaged and living her life. I’m happy that Octavia made the amends she felt she needs to make. And I’m happy that Sam’s shoe collection will be protected with a prenup.



Photo credit: Avalon Red and Instagram

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42 Responses to “Octavia Spencer apologized to Britney privately for telling her to get a prenup”

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  1. Amy T says:

    File under “How decent people apologize.” I want to be her friend. Also I hope she has a great time at Sam & Britney’s wedding. (If you need a plus-one, Octavia, hit me up!)

  2. Pork chops & Apple sauce says:

    Octavia is cool, plain and simple.

  3. Lightpurple says:

    Octavia is a wonderful human

  4. Joanna says:

    She just said what everyone is thinking. I think Sam really loves Britney but it’s always good for a wealthy person to protect their assets,

    • STRIPE says:

      It’s true but there’s no need to comment that on her post celebrating her engagement. It implies you think he’s using her or they will fail. And it wasn’t just Octavia, a lot of people posted that. It’s incredibly mean IMO.

      She’s rich, she has lawyers- she’s aware of prenups and will get one if she wants. She doesn’t need strangers implying negative things when she’s trying to celebrate.

      • KissMyA**23 says:


        If you’re marrying for the right reasons, than no one would need to protect assets. I personally would not get a prenup. I just think it’s like telling the other person in the relationship “I need to protect myself against you. And I don’t trust you. Oh and we’re going to fail.”

        But that’s just me. I thought Sam’s response was cute and I wish them both the best.

      • Mac says:

        Brittany has been exploited by her father for 13 years. I think it is perfectly normal for her to protect her assets with a prenup.

      • KissMyA**23 says:

        @Mac, Did I miss something? Is she engaged to her father? I thought she was engaged to Sam. Sam has done nothing but support her from what I’ve seen.

        Obviously her family is a pile of S**t. That doesn’t mean that Sam is.

      • Golly Gee says:

        Exactly! When other celebrities get engaged, their social media isn’t flooded with “get a prenup” comments. It implies she is too stupid, too naïve, or too messed up in someway to consider doing this. (Britney reading instagram comment suggestions and slapping her hand to her forehead thinking: thank you fans! I never thought of that. Why haven’t my lawyer suggested this?.). It’s insulting to her for these reasons and it’s insulting to imply Sam is after her money.
        Unfortunately Octavia is the one who was called out because her post got the publicity. From what I could glean on Twitter, it may have been due in part to Sam’s make up artist friend Maxi who galvanized some Britney fans to demand an apology on Octavia’s social media. However other fans criticized Maxi’s action in specifically calling out only Octavia as racist.
        It was unfair to Octavia to be singled out but she handled it with grace. She seems like a very kind person so I’m sure it wasn’t meant to be hurtful.

      • teecee says:

        I think if you have existing children, or are part of a family business, something like that – you should get a prenup.

      • Joanna says:


  5. Becks1 says:

    That’s very nice of her. My guess is she made the joke, thought it was funny (I mean it kind of was), and then maybe when she saw the pile on with pre-nup comments etc decided it wasn’t as funny anymore, which happens sometimes. One comment can be a joke but the same comment from a thousand different people ends up not being as funny. Or maybe she just thought about in the days after and decided it was in poor taste.

    Her apology is very nice and I like Sam’s response as well – I think it shows that he has a good understanding of what is going to come with being engaged/married to Britney.

  6. Ninks says:

    I love Octavia and this has just made me like her even more. It was a joke, with no I’ll intent behind it. But sometimes innocent jokes made among friends can look completely different to outsiders and maybe she felt it was an inappropriate thing to say on a public platform.

    • BothSidesNow says:

      @ Ninks, I am with you! As I read the article, I thought that Octavia was joking, but it could be taken badly as it was posted on her announcement on IG. The fact that Octavia realized it could have been misconstrued, as classy woman that she is, she immediately apologized privately and publicly. Having said that, not only did I adore and love Octavia before, but now I love her even more than I did before!!! She seems to be a lovely and wonderful woman. I wish that the powers to be would cast her more!! I have watched her movie with Melissa McCarthy at least 3 times because I love her so much!!! I also think McCarthy is great as well!!

  7. Lozface says:

    I absolutely love Octavia, I’d do anything to be her friend.

    I think we are all thinking the same about the prenup but there’s also an insinuation with it that he’s only marrying her for money, which could be so hurtful to Britney. Britney deserves to enjoy this moment as she’s been robbed of so much happiness in her life. I wish them all the best for a happy future.

    I think it’s great that Octavia apologised, and recognised that particular joke isn’t what Britney deserved straight after announcing her engagement.

  8. Merricat says:

    Octavia is lovely and puts the lie to the idea that big talent means big ego. We crave decency these days, and it’s a relief to hear stories like this.

  9. Lou says:

    Octavia is such a gem. Love her!

  10. Kelsey says:

    So obvious it was a joke but very classy of her to (admittedly, rightfully) realize that a joke to one can be damaging to another. I didn’t even think much into it until saw this article and could see how such implications could be hurtful to Britney. Am glad tho that, at least according to Sam, they understood the assignment too.

    Love everyone involved in this situation, and Octavia has always been so awesome. This is wholesome.

  11. Annie says:

    I personally found it patronising towards Britney. Has she ever said something like this to other celebrities who got engaged before?

    • Jenny says:

      I kind of do think this joke is rolled out every time a wealthy person marries… whether the mate is wealthy or not.

  12. anniefannie says:

    I’ve always found Octavia to be a genuinely nice person and this goes a long way to proving it. Sometimes seemingly innocent/ funny, “ I’ve got your back girl” remarks can get away from you. She rightly did a course correction and I think she’s genuine in her remorse. Best wishes Brit!!!

  13. BnlurNforever says:

    Octavia spoke at a professional development conference I attended for work a few years ago and she was just wonderful. Everyone who worked with her had nothing but great things to say about her afterwards and while she was presenting she was just like we know her to be, down to earth and gracious. Sometimes people go from humble beginnings to incredible heights and forget where they came from but she seems to have retained who she is and that’s a lovely person.

    I am happy she apologized, sometimes even thinking you might have erred and hurt someone is reason enough to apologize and clear the air. I’m sure Britany appreciated it and we heard from her other half, so it seems it’s all good. I hope the foot-in-mouthers of Hollywood have taken note on how to handle these situations.

  14. Mich says:

    Love Octavia but didn’t love the ‘joke’. Britney has been enslaved by those closest to her for money. She has been called crazy, stupid and incapable in very public ways.

    She will never get those years back but she has met a man who has stood by her and up for her and she wants to build the life she missed out on with him. Then the world tells her it won’t last and she is going to be used again.

  15. Liz version 700 says:

    Octavia sounds like a lovely person. And she sounds quite intelligent. Britany enough people have taken from you, get a prenup. The remark should not have been said, but I do hope she follows the advice. It’s OK to love someone with your full heart and protect yourself in case it ends badly.

  16. Mel says:

    Maybe the place/timing was wrong but the sentiment wasn’t , Britney needs a prenup. As a person of enormous wealth plus mental health issues, she needs a prenup to protect herself. She also needs to have something put in place so if she isn’t competent to handle her affairs someone else, preferably a neutral party/ company. We all want to think this will be great but she is a vulnerable person, she should protect herself AND her kids.

    • Mich says:

      Britany had a trust in place. When people say she had no money, it was because the vast majority was in the trust. Then her father (and sister and other leeches) changed the trust (something I’m not sure they had a legal right to do) to give themselves control.

      My point is that Britany knows what she needs to do and we know that because it is what she did when she still had control over her life.

  17. Erica says:

    This actually made me like Sam more. He sort of rolled his eyes and didn’t take it se

  18. Erica says:


    I mean, was she wrong? She sure wasn’t the only one saying it either.

    • Goldie says:

      The fact that she wasn’t the only one saying it is kind of the problem. Like another poster mentioned above, 1 comment may be funny, but when thousands of people post the same thing, it feels like a mean pile-on.

      Of course Britney should get a prenup, but I’m sure she knows this. She’s a 40 year old woman who has been divorced before. She has attorneys to advise her. She doesn’t need strangers to tell her about pre-nups.

  19. psl says:

    She had nothing to apologize for. I think a lot of people are worried about Britney.

    Octavia is fabulous. Love her.

  20. WithTheAmerican says:

    Love her and her sweet apology, but also think her comment was lovingly true.

    Brit has been exploited by everyone in her life. A pre nup is a great way of ensuring his motives are pure – what is hers will be his as long as they are married. So there shouldn’t be any problem.

  21. taris says:

    lots of people feel really protective towards britney – especially now with everything that’s happening. although i agreed with octavia’s sentiment and i do believe she meant no snark, i did think it was a bit distasteful (and intrusive) to post that right underneath on brit’s engagement announcement. a simple “congratulations!” would’ve sufficed.

    anyway, she apologised. she’s gracious. britney’s happy. sam seems like such a cool guy.
    it’s all good!

  22. Renee says:

    Octavia is such a class act. It was a perfect apology. I’m so glad she had the maturity and wisdom to correct her comments she felt were inappropriate. I wish other well known people & celebrities (cough* Teigen) would take note that this is how you make amends.

  23. MissMarirose says:

    When people talk about prenups, I always think of Jessica Simpson and Nick Lashay.
    Her dad refused to let her sign a prenup before their marriage. By the time they divorced, she was worth far more than him so Nick got quite a nice settlement.

    You just never know, people.

  24. teecee says:

    I think she saw the pile on and other than being a nice person, which she clearly is, she also saw the situation from the POV of being a celebrity as well. She knows what it’s like when fans and strangers assume that that know you more than they actually do, and when those people take liberties they really shouldn’t take. So she apologized, which was the right move.

  25. Lea says:

    It was rude and insensitive since we all know Britney reads the comments, cares about what people think a lot and has admitted that she has self esteem issues.
    It is probably the happiest moment in Britney’s life for the past decade. She has a tough road ahead of her in court and I just wish people would have allowed her to just enjoy the moment and shown they were happy for her.