TV shows make “life coach” sound like a cool, glamorous job, but I would imagine that most life coaches are either hustlers or glorified cheerleaders. By “cheerleaders,” I mean people who are good at hyping someone up, recognizing someone’s achievements, a friendly, positive sort of associate. Very few life coaches are actually trained and certified therapists in any way. Well, SZA found that out the hard way – this poor woman thought she was talking to a therapist but nothing was getting better. Turns out, she was seeing a life coach.
Life coaching is not the same as therapy, and SZA learned that the hard way. In a new cover story interview for WSJ. Magazine’s November Innovator’s issue, the 33-year-old R&B superstar opened up about how she deals with difficult emotions, noting that she’s tried hypnotherapy, talk therapy, psychiatry and acupuncture.
One time, however, she accidentally saw a life coach thinking they were a therapist. The unofficial counselor taught her about box breathing as a method for lessening anxiety, but SZA grew frustrated as the exercise didn’t help.
“After I had box breathed myself for three months and didn’t get better, I called her in a f—ing frenzy like, ‘I’m about to commit myself to an institution today, I need help!’ I said, ‘What form of therapy do you do? DBT?’” she told the publication, referencing dialectical behavior therapy. SZA continued, “She was like, ‘I don’t have a clinical form of therapy because I’m not a licensed therapist, honey. I thought you knew that.’ It turns out she was not a board-certified therapist. She was a f—ing life coach.”
There are several major differences between the two practices — mainly that life coaching does not require a medical degree and therapy does, though many coaches still undergo training.
“Unlike psychotherapy, coaching aims to help people who are already functioning at ordinary or even higher levels work through emotional discomfort and make additional gains,” wrote Yael Schonbrun and Brad Stulberg for The Washington Post in 2022. “A coach can help you perform better physically, emotionally, professionally, socially or athletically, depending on the specialty.”
No, but really, I imagine so many people make that mistake and life coaches encourage people to make that mistake. It reminds me of Gwyneth Paltrow’s merry band of pseudoscientists. She’ll say sh-t like “Dr. Mumbojumbo claims that these stickers will heal a brain tumor” and the doctor in question has a PhD in ‘crystal therapy’. Basically, before you go into therapy, make sure you’re actually seeing a psychiatrist, psychologist or licensed therapist. Poor SZA! She’s not going to be signing up for BetterUp anytime soon.
Cover courtesy of WSJ. Magazine, additional photos courtesy of Cover Images & Avalon Red.
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- SZA poses for photographers at Departures from The Mark Hotel to The Metropolitan Museum Costume Istitute Gala on May 2, 2022 in New York, New York, USA.,Image: 688679502, License: Rights-managed, Restrictions: , Model Release: no, Pictured: SZA, Credit line: Robin Platzer / Twin Images / Avalon
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- 2022 Met Gala celebrating ‘In America: An Anthology of Fashion’ – Arrivals Featuring: SZA Where: New York, New York, United States When: 02 May 2022 Credit: John Nacion/startraksphoto.com/Cover Images
Ummm, NO, People. Therapy does not “require a medical degree”. Psychiatrists have medical degrees, but, for the most part, don’t do therapy. Licensed Clinical Psychologists have PhDs and PsyDs and often do therapy. Licensed Social Workers and Licensed Professional Counselors have Masters Degrees and may do therapy.
What happened to the Research Department at People Magazine?
This is all correct. Thanks for posting.
“Life coaches” who misrepresent themselves as mental health professionals with legitimate credentials are running a dangerous grift.
THANK YOU! This was my first and only reaction to this article.
SO important to get the facts straight. Especially given this article is about, uh, not getting the facts straight.
Also, some counsellors do life coaching ON TOP OF counselling. I had one who did so.
🎯 They should have said “clinical”, rather than “medical”.
Just going to weigh in and say that while it’s really important to know and understand the difference between a coach and a therapist, I’ve been working with the same coach for almost three years, and it’s been such a good experience that my sister recently started doing the same (with someone different).
The most important similarity between the two is that in both situations, you cut them loose and find someone more suitable if the relationship isn’t working for you.
Came to the comments to say the same about my long-time experience working with a life coach first for an eating disorder and now just for general life stressors. She works with both me and my husband separately and basically got us from the brink of divorce a few years ago, which a licensed couples therapist couldn’t do. It’s all about the person’s experience and how you vibe with them, if you can really trust them. I sometimes read books to help with parenting or I started reading an internal family systems book and there hasn’t been anything I learned in those that my coach hadn’t already told me in some form or another (not to say the books aren’t helpful, because sometimes you need to digest information in different ways at different times in your life for it to really sink in).
I have a friend currently training to become a life coach. She’s got untreated bipolar disorder and is about the last person from whom I’d take life advice.
Not entirely sure who’s the bigger grifter, the life coaches themselves or the people who run the schools. I suspect she’s been robbed blind by the man who owns the “institute”.
The dubiousness of your naive, unmedicated friend’s coaching certification aside, I think I’d like to gently point out that your friend not having it “together” doesn’t preclude her from helping others (I’m thinking of writers like Heather Havrilesky or Cheryl Strayed, whose Ask Polly and Dear Sugar columns were so resonant BECAUSE they had ongoing struggles of their own). And as any of us knows, it’s so much easier to problem-solve others’ lives, to see things with clarity, than to be active in our own lives.
I recently joked that I’ve “worked very hard to get to a place most people would consider well below average,” and that’s because I’m measuring my health only against itself. I also have a lot of support — from LMFTs who don’t shame me, who cheer me on and who help problem-solve. Those are the traits I’d seek in any *good* counselor, therapist, coach, or doctor. Or friend, I guess!
Sorry, just following up. Downthread it’s clearer from others’ remarks that, worryingly, life coaching can sometimes be organized like a pyramid scheme, which I now realize you were alluding to and are partly concerned about. I do hope your friend comes out of this experience ok.
Coaches are beneficial in their time and place and therapists are beneficial in theirs. The most important thing is that whomever you are working with is a good fit for your needs and that you’re making progress.
There are so many people who have been seeing the same therapist for YEARS and they’re just spinning their wheels on the same issues over and over again. That’s no more beneficial (despite whatever credentials that therapist has) than a minimally trained coach.
💕 🔥 💤 🎶 🎙️
Out of curiosity, I just looked up BetterUps reviews and they’re not good. There are poor reviews from people who worked there as coaches who describe the online classes BetterUp uses to “train” coaches and it seems so basic. There are a lot of former customers complaining that BetterUp only cared about collecting payments and ghosted clients who had concerns or wanted to cancel their subscriptions.
I was going to try a Life Coach when I was at a low point but it was expensive and not covered by insurance.
It’s unfortunate that she was confused on who she was talking to.
I just listened to season three of The Dream podcast which was all about life coaching (seasons one and two were about MLMs) and it was so interesting. It came across as a deeply sketchy field, closely linked to MLMs, with some good practitioners sprinkled in among the charlatans. Earlier this year my father wanted to give thousands to a life coach who said she specialized in coaching retired people, and all he would have gotten in exchange for 2k was three months’ access to a video course, he would have had to give 9k for some personal sessions plus a year’s access to the video course. Luckily my debunking combined with his natural thrift got him to change his mind before he gave her too much money. But I really hate grifters.
I have heard of a trained therapist who switched to life coaching because people who sought out life coaching tend to be serious about achieving their goals. that being said, I also know a few people who are/want to be life coaches and I’m like “based on what?!?”
Sometimes people with security clearances want therapy but feel like they can’t be known to have gotten / be in therapy, and I’ve referred them to a great therapist I know who also does life coaching.
The note is very different and the lady knows that for certain jobs, or cases where there is totally going to be an acrimonious custody dispute, she is to be very careful about what she writes and doesn’t write. And then whatever they talk about in addition to the note is whatever they talk about.
It’s one of my favorite tricks.
As a social worker I should also add that an LCSW (Licensed Clinical Social Worker) is also a very common credential for a qualified therapist.
What SZA went through was horrible. I’m not sure how that coach sold her services, but if SZA thought she was in therapy something sounds off. I hope she’s now able to get the help she needs and can thrive!
A friend of ours was in the printing business for architects, a business that has more or less disappeared. He’s moved over into consulting. To support that, he’s currently doing a two-year course as a coach. He feels he’s become much better at listening to people and helping them with bettering communication for projects. He also said that he couldn’t do life coaching at this point, because he’s older and he doesn’t have the right network.
Coaches can be incredibly helpful for people whose issues are more about overwhelm and lack of clarity. I know that for ADHD, I’ve had therapists who were great about my family issues, but always felt things at work weren’t as bad as I thought they were. Right up until I got fired! ADHD coaches were, hey let’s get something that works for that problem, right away! But for ADHD unhelpful therapy is covered by insurance, coaching isn’t.
But yes, like yoga, coaches are ending up making their money training new coaches, with the inevitable glut of coaches and people out thousands of dollars in training with a certification that will not help them make any money.
This! I had a friend going from one life coach to another – basically people with a few weekend certifications – and she had serious serious trauma in her background that needed to be discussed and analysed with a professional psychiatrist or someone of a similar level of training. None of those coaches ever referred her on and that I find very irresponsible of them.
Sounds Like a Cult podcast did an episode on life coaches. It’s not uncommon for people looking for actual therapists to accidentally end up seeing a life coach. I’m glad SZA spoke out about this so people can get the help they are actually seeking.
Ugh, so disappointing… coaches are totally different from therapists. There are so many “life coaches” on social media promising people their best life and success. In my experience a lot of them are folks who had a tough time (like overcoming depression or an addiction) and took an 8-week certification course and now feel like they can help other people. Buyer beware.