Jesus Luz tries not to look cross-eyed in new ad campaign


This isn’t the first time that I’ve noticed Jesus Luz’s Achilles Heel as a model – I noticed this when he was photographed for Interview Magazine a few months ago, when he took these slightly NSFW photos showing off his man-bush. Apparently he thinks if shows off his man-bush (or various other parts of his body) we won’t notice that Jesus is pretty much cross-eyed. No disrespect to people who are actually cross-eyed or whatever, but if you had that condition, would you try to model? If your cross-eyes weren’t bangin’ Madonna’s Gristle, would anyone buy you as a cross-eyed model? Could it be that this “cross-eyed-ness” might explain the relationship between Madge and Jesus? Maybe he literally can’t see Madge the way we see her. Just a thought.


Anyway, these are photos from Jesus’s new ad campaign for Ellus Leather Denim, which I’ve never heard of. The model Jesus is groping is named Cintia Dicker, poor thing.

I honestly think the problem might be that Jesus isn’t actually cross-eyed, he just photographs that way. Like, he’s got all of the elements that would make him pretty, or make him interesting as a model, like good hair and skin, long eyelashes, strong nose, wide mouth, whatever. But by some fluke of photography, those features change in photos and he looks cross-eyed. Or it’s not just the way he photographs, and Madge is bangin’ a dude a lazy eye.



Jesus Luz’s Ellis ad campaign courtesy of HuffPo.

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15 Responses to “Jesus Luz tries not to look cross-eyed in new ad campaign”

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  1. Sunnyjyl says:

    sigh. I am officially old. Back in the day, I would be drooling all over this. Now, I’m thinking, “Madonna, send him back to his mommy.”

  2. e says:

    he is just not that attractive.

  3. Derek says:

    Are your glasses on? Because I’m completely missing the cross-eyed thing. But whatever. That first picture he looks pretty good.

  4. Kaye says:

    He’s not a very good model. He looks better in candid pics. He just looks slack-jawed here.

  5. j. ferber says:

    Wow! Boy is sexy. Some ladies are super-critical. Enjoy the eye candy!

  6. LolaBella says:

    Umm, I don’t think I’ve ever looked at his EYES before. *blushes*

    I like him in these pics except that thanks to you, Kaiser, I can see that his eyes look like they’re unnaturally close together!

    The Dicker model looks like a deranged version of Kate Moss in the face.

  7. Susette says:

    I just don’t find him attractive at all. He skeeves me out.

    But that “cross-eyed” title cracked me up. Having been distracted by his cross eyes before, I’m wondering how he’s holding it in.

  8. Tia C says:

    LOL at the headline. Isn’t there surgery that can correct a crossed eye? If so, I wonder why he doesn’t get it. He’s great looking but the wonk eye kind of ruins it for me. Although thankfully it is harder to notice it in these photos.

  9. Mentok the Mind Taker says:

    Mean & Stupid Humor:

    If he and Miley Cyrus’ mom had a kid, it’d look like a Cyclops.

    I’m sorry. I couldn’t keep that to myself.

  10. Tia C says:

    @ Mentok: LOL!! You are right…

  11. Wresa says:

    Funny how people have such different tastes in what is attractive. I could never look at him and think he is ugly, but obviously he is not everyone’s cup of tea. To me, he is just…beautiful!

  12. foobie says:

    He has great features, I have to admit, though he’s really not my type.

    But not every good looker takes a good pic. I know this really attractive girl irl who just looks… strange, like something’s off… when photographed.

    And about the crossed eyes, a friend of mine is a model and he’s got the wonk eye as well but only sometimes. Mostly when he’s staring too hard at something. (?)

  13. Kelly says:

    He just looks really, really stupid. But then Madge has never struck me as any great shakes in the brain department either, no matter how many people are going to howl about her fab career etc etc. It seems to me that she’s always sucked the expertise out of a whole raft of other people rather than come up with it herself. And I dont think she’d tolerate being in a relationship with someone smarter than her. Poor dear.
    I dunno… he’s just vain and empty looking. Sort of like a pretty piece of taxidermy with vacant glass eyes. Thanks, but no thanks.

  14. turkoid says:

    he’s got a hypnotic stare…the stare, his body, and hair (top/bottom) makes the room seem much warmer.

  15. Sean says:

    He is genetically gifted
    stop the hate