Eli Roth has a great ass (slightly NSFW)


Last year, something crazy happened with Eli Roth. Something celebrities rarely get caught doing. Eli began tweeting with Christoph Waltz (who askes what all of the “Blueberry” stuff was about), and then the tweeting went to ONTD, and then some other stuff happened, and then Eli basically had cyber sex with lots of his fans. His fans began calling themselves Blueberries, and Eli totally didn’t apologize for letting everything get so raunchy with his fans. For the recap, go here.

Anyway, after that little incident, Eli had a rabid fan base of Blueberries, and there was even an “awkward” meeting. I can’t find out what happened, but in my mind, Eli probably wanted to have an orgy with all the pretty girls, and they wanted to talk about movies. Or source theorized, “Knowing him, the [orgy] thought probably crossed his mind several times. It was a midnight movie meeting…. but when they weren’t all glamorous & model-like, he probably lost the boner.”

So Eli and the Bluberries no longer got along. And they were made even more upset by the simple fact that Eli began boning Peaches Geldof, a girl so utterly unworthy of him. This is the peachy straw that broke the camel’s back. The Blueberries revolted, and someone (who knows who) posted a photo of Eli’s tight, waxed, hot ass on ONTD. I’m loving this:

Did he wax his ass? Someone (who shall remain nameless) thinks maybe he did, probably when he got everything else waxed (like his back). But I think I’m seeing hair. Still, it’s a great ass, isn’t it? And he has a sweet little mole on one cheek too. Mm… Mole Butt. Just think, Peaches Geldof gets to bone the Mole Butt. Ugh.

Photos courtesy of ONTD and Eli’s Twitter.

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33 Responses to “Eli Roth has a great ass (slightly NSFW)”

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  1. ligeia says:

    “slightly” not safe for work? haha yeah what boss wouldn’t be happy to see a hairy man ass on your computer screen…
    don’t like the ass either, looks like he sits on it all day and doesn’t know what gym looks like.

  2. Obvious says:

    his butt is cute. not fantastic but cute. Kaiser i must say once again you can perpetually lift up my day. period. You always make me laugh and about 99% of the time your diatribes feel like they are coming out of my mouth.

  3. TeamBethenny says:

    That is an ass that needs to become acquainted, sooner rather than later, with squats. Many of them.

  4. Rebel says:

    Oh hey, I’m the “who knows who” who posted the pic. Thanks for picking up the story!

  5. Lady Nightshade says:

    I don’t understand how anyone could have seen his movie, Hostel, and still be into him. He is clearly a perverted, sexist douche

  6. moo says:

    Something about him really creeps me out. Aside from being interested in Peaches… which is just flat out disgusting. No… there’s something very, slimy, grossout, creepy going on there…..

  7. Dhavy says:

    could have been worse, like an ass that’s not exfoliated then again my phone doesn’t give me a close up clear look

  8. Mouse says:

    Meh, not impressed. My fiance’s tush is much cuter! ^-^

  9. GatsbyGal says:

    @Lady Nightshare – THANK YOU. Hostel was basically torture porn. Eli Roth is into some sick shit and he’s a weird person (and not in a good way).

  10. Just a Poster says:


    (okay not the most mature thing I could have said.. but what popped into my mind LOL)

  11. princess pea says:

    Yeah, I’m with Lady Nightshade on this. He’s a creep, and the blueberries who fangirled all over ONTD still kind of ick me out.

  12. Kimberly says:

    It really is hard for me to dislike him … or have dirty thoughts of what I’d do to him .

  13. Snarf says:

    Too hairy for my liking (then there’s the whole Peaches Geldof thing, which is a total deal breaker).

  14. Green Is Good says:

    He lost all hotness when he started screwing that junkie slut Peaches.

  15. Brooke says:

    I first saw Eli Roth in Inglorious Basterds and was in LOVE with the Bear Jew. Then I learned that he was the dude who makes those creepy movies I haven’t seen and was slightly offput – but he’s still cute 🙂

  16. Anonymous says:

    I don’t understand how someone whose dad is a psych prof at Harvard could date a Scientologist. Does not compute.

  17. girl says:

    As asses go, pretty average. Since there is no actual identifier on the pic itself that it is actually him, I wonder if he found a pic online somewhere and tried to pass it off as himself when the “tits or GTFO” fiasco happened.

    I used to like the guy but when he cried, “I’m telling your mama you were meeeeeen on the interwebz to my idiot girlfriend” (and insulted her parenting and dragged the rest of her chidlren into it too) I lost respect for him.

    Come on. When you are barrelling towards 40, one would think that one would excersize better judgement than that.

  18. Lisa says:

    His butt is a little saggy for my taste, why would anyone want to bone Eli Roth, he looks like a nerd, and has a creepy stalker smile.

  19. jzhz says:

    Yeah, if his ass was waxed, they didn’t do a very thorough job…and I agree, his butt doesn’t look like he exercises at all!

  20. Lori says:

    He probably has a really tiny penis, idk. = p

  21. girl says:

    And from those pics of Eli and Peaches kissing, they both look like terrible kissers.

  22. hairball says:

    He seems totally gay to me. I thought he was gay when I first saw a picture of him.

  23. gimmieabreak says:


  24. Lucy says:

    That backview is far from hot.
    Very far.
    Tone and slim up, Eli.
    Or maybe you just wanna be as ugly and flabby as Peaches?
    Ewwww both.

  25. ViktoryGin says:

    Lol. Funny. Eli Roth exists in the margins of my world. I’ve never read a story having to do with him and knew next to little of him. Until now.

    I clicked on the post just for the hell of it, and my first reaction to his picture before reading the article was “depraved lunatic”. And lo, and behold! That’s some damn good intuition. That he is responsible for “Hostel” is sooooo apropos with those sleazeall, psychomaniac eyes.

    He is too good for Peaches Geldof? Seems to me like that they make pretty comfy bedfellows. He obviously has a taste for what scum that life has to offer, slummming with random fans and all (no offense Blueberries). His and Geldof’s sex life is very interesting, I bet. She brings the blow, he the ax.

  26. sickofit says:

    uuuu i so think hes strange in a negative way. dont like him at all and i too think he and peaches are a match made in hell…

  27. late night wigs says:

    What is it about this guy? He is NOT hot, he is a sick f*ck (anyone who made the Hostel movies is obviously disturbed), and he looks like a gorilla. GROSS. Also, he should get that mole removed, moles gross me out and every time I see one I always wonder why that person hasn’t had it removed. It’s gross, he’s gross, so is Peaches….enough with this douche already!

  28. michellllle says:

    Flat & hairy, about as attractive as the rest of him. The only appealing part was the blueberries.

  29. Aitch says:

    Nice ass
    Crappy movies

  30. snapnhiss says:

    I’m kind of ambivalent… I think he’s cute and I think that’s a cute ass but his movies are very disturbing, and that’s coming from a horror movie fan. But I think he’s kind of awesome for taking the time to meet and play online with his fans. Too bad it all went south, but fans can get kind of wacko even without the skanky new girlfriend usurping their perceived place in his life.

  31. hatsumomo says:

    What. Ever. My man still has the cutest little booty ever, unwaxed and all. Sigh, love can distort your perceptions….

  32. Jermaine Ferguson - High School Teacher says:

    I wouldn’t mind parking my dick in that!