Colin Farrell is made of lies, claims he’s all about “monogamy”

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Yesterday, somebody was trying to tweet me suggestions for Hot Guy Friday, and she listed “Jude Law, Colin Barrel…” Which really should be Colin Farrell’s handle, right? We could call him Colin “Double Barrel” Farrell. It’s kind of perfect. Anyway, Colin is on today’s Ellen DeGeneres show, and he’s really trying to win us over. Like, he doesn’t want us to think that he’s out there, boning randoms whenever the urge strikes. Oh, Colin. I don’t believe you.

Despite his playboy reputation, Colin Farrell is a one-woman kind of guy. During a Friday appearance on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, the 34-year-old Horrible Bosses actor says he’s single — and he’s not exactly on the prowl, either.

“I was never much for dating,” he explains. “I was much for a few things, but I kind of usually went decent-ish amount of time.”

“So you’re a monogamous person?” host Ellen DeGeneres asks.

“Yeah?” Farrell, who has two sons from two different relationships, responds.

“That was a question,” DeGeneres, 53, laughs. “That was not an answer.”

“No, I think when I answer yes to something like that, I’m kind of shocked myself that I’m answering yes,” Farrell explains. “That’s why it was a question. I’m kind of like, ‘Colin do you really believe yourself?'”

[From Us Weekly]

The subtext: Colin isn’t even a good enough actor to pull off the monogamy line. I think Colin wants to believe it of himself: that he’s the kind of guy who is looking for a stable, monogamous relationship. And hey, maybe he is. Maybe he’s a serial monogamist who goes from one stable relationship to another. But I doubt it. I think that even though he’s sober and his life is on a much healthier track, Colin will still bone pretty much any girl, at any time. By the way, that’s why I’ve always kind of loved him too: realistically, I have a shot. He will bone anything, ergo, he will bone me. I have a shot with him for one night (or one hour, whatever).

In other Colin news, he’s signed on to work with his In Bruges director again, in the film Seven Psychopaths (horrible title, I hope they change it). He’ll be working with Sam Rockwell (yes!) and Christopher Walken. Also, you know how Colin is doing the Total Recall remake? Ethan Hawke just signed on too. Yay!

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Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame & Pacific Coast News.

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50 Responses to “Colin Farrell is made of lies, claims he’s all about “monogamy””

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  1. Sam says:

    I’m sorry. All I could make out from this article was hot, Colin Farrell’s handle, perfect, urge… *le sigh*

  2. the original bellaluna says:

    Oh Colin. We love you for your randy self, not this persona you’re attempting to devise!

    Total Recall was a shit-fest. There is A.B.S.O.L.U.T.E.L.Y. NO WAY I would watch a re-make. Seriously, is there any way it could get BETTER? Don’t think so!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. Stephani says:

    Do we get to enjoy a HGF today?? =)

  4. Stephani says:

    Nevermind! I see that HGF was just now posted!!! Yay!

  5. Praise St. Angie! says:

    GOT-DAYUM…this man is fine.

    I know, I know…he’s a dirty man-slut, but I still would (a la MichaelK).

    I think your take on it is right on. I think he WANTS to be a monogamous guy, but just can’t help himself.

    I know a few guys like that myself…REALLY good looking, also REALLY sweet, would make a great boyfriend (other than the straying) but CANNOT resist a woman who makes herself available…and plenty do as the guy is SO good looking.

  6. the_blonde_one says:

    Hey, if he’s not running around boning randoms, how the hell am I going to get a chance with him?

    Mr Farrell, I think I speak for all of us when I say, we LIKE you dirty dirty.

  7. Kimbob says:

    He’s hot. He’s my #1 guy…only Colin.

  8. brin says:

    We don’t believe you…don’t ever change, Colin!

  9. Nancy says:

    I love me some Colin Farrell that boy is sexy as hell!!!!

  10. Lisa Turtle says:

    @ Kaiser:

    File this under Skeevy Guys who used to be Hot – I have a scoop for you. Ethan Hawke & his former nanny, now wife, are having their second child. She’s early in the pregnancy, but they live in my neighborhood and I saw them wandering around with him rubbing her belly. It was kinda sad, if he was a bigger star someone besides yours truly Lisa Turtle, would have noticed and it would have made it to the press. It’s clear he wanted someone to see, he just came from the era before celebrities knew to just call the paparazzi whenever they wanted to “candidly” leak some information.

  11. Kimbob says:

    Sorry, but I’ve just GOT to post again. You know, from the 1st time I saw this guy…it was instant lust/love. So what if he’s not monogamous….if I was a guy and looked LIKE THAT…I wouldn’t be, either. For me, he’s just GOT IT!!!

  12. Shay says:

    He just reminds me of all the beer swilling drunkards that converge on Sydney’s eastern suburban beaches. An Irish backpacker. Vulgar, hygienically challenged and as rough as guts.

  13. sapphire says:

    Ladies, please since you are going to get your shot, do the necessary and bring condoms! And be read to post details….

  14. JM says:

    Oh Colin, when will you accept you are the community dong? Keep looking fine as hell and banging random women. We still love you.

  15. Apple says:

    He gets off on knocking women up he is like the john stamos character on SVU
    “reproductive abuser”

    He will have 20 kids by the time his semen runs out.

  16. Mari says:

    @Kimbob- Oh Lawdy! We must have been seperated at birth!

  17. gloaming says:

    I believe he’s put the drugs and debauchery behind him.

    If he hadn’t we’d have all sorts of trash selling their stories.

  18. Quest says:

    Liar, Liar…I wanna put Colin’s pants on fire…LOL

  19. Lisa Turtle says:

    My Bad @ Kaiser! I guess if I cared about him more I would have known they already announced it! Ha! But you should’ve seen they way they were carrying on. He wanted attention.

  20. Jen34 says:

    I think I have a shot with him, too; and I don’t think it matters that I don’t look like Blake Lively. I love guys like that.

  21. Penguen says:

    Am I the only one who read the headline as “all about MAHOGANY?”

    I was pretty confused, thinking he was a dendrophiliac.

  22. bluhare says:

    @Shay (#12): And your point is?

  23. the_blonde_one says:

    I think shay was helpin’ us gals out. roadtrip anyone?

  24. Slim Charles says:

    @Penguen #22 Dendrophiliac! LOL!!

    The third photo of him looks just like Lauren Conrad’s douchey boyfriend on the hills, Jason whoever.

  25. SFRowGuy says:

    Colin, babe. Monogamy is in the dictionary, look it up. The definition is not ‘only having sex with one person at a time’.

    (I’d still do you. Call me.)

  26. cailinos says:

    Holy God he is a gorgeous guy. Sounds like ‘serial monogamy’ is right….he’s not reliving the wild multi-groupie excesses beloved of our rock gods, is he? And his chirren didn’t happen to horrified, unwilling partners, did they? He seems quite sexually abstemious compared to a few interchangeable starlets I can think of, but no one calls them out for fear of censure. (I live in hope myself, as Colin DID proposition the ineffable Dame Maggie Smith, didn’t he?!)

  27. duh says:

    Alicja was stupid to have a baby with him. She thought that it will guarantee her a Hollywood career. Well, it didn’t. F-ing actors not always pays off.

  28. Roxy750 says:

    @Praise St. Angie! Just said it all. Thank you dear for making my laugh! “dirty man-slut” hit that one right on the beaner!

  29. granos says:

    Kaiser,
    Thanks for that header photo. Double Barrel Luck Charms looks so handsome. Yes, in my head I’ve always called him My Lucky Charms, but Double Barrell puts a whole new spin to it. BTW thanks for the shout out.

  30. Mimi says:

    Although Colin lost his number 1 spot on my “to do” list, (he has been replaced by James Franco…don’t hate) I still find him so damn sexy! Love, love, love this man. He has such a sweetness about him that you can almost overlook the fact that he is a total manwhore of epic proportions lol.

  31. truthzbetta says:

    I agree…you all have a shot. Just please be ready to share details as some of us are scared of this level of man-whore but are ready to pull up a chair to hear all about it. It’s called gossip and it makes a rough day a lot more pleasant.

    Maybe you could film it and hold viewing parties. Beats Tupperware and I hear it’s worked with this one before.

  32. Christine says:

    Hi, my name is Chris, and I love Colin Farrell and I can’t stop putting him on my list of five.

  33. mimi says:

    I love Colin Farrell despite himself. But that kind of hard living is going to make him age fast….hate to say it but I can already start to see it and he’s only 34?

  34. sandra says:

    Yup, the man is yummy – he’s my free pass if I had the chance! LOVE Double Barrel Farrell – that’s a good name for him.

  35. Lila says:

    I’m pretty sure Colin’s version of monogamy is not having threesomes.

  36. SassyOne says:

    So dirrrty.

    So yeesssss, but sooo no.

  37. foozy says:

    you’re hot colin!! don’t change for anyone!

  38. kasper says:

    i think he meant to say he’s all about misogyny

  39. MissBabylon says:

    my god i love him!!! he is my dream man next to johnny depp!!! their both sooo damn fine!!!!!!!!

  40. Andie B says:

    Colin has a lovely Irish twinkle in his eye, but that does not get rid of the sleazy vibe. A lot of the Irish guys who come by this part of the world would shag a goat if it bought them a Guinness. I say that with Love, as my husband and I both have Irish ancestry. Other than that, the only Irish guys I would look twice at are Bono, Kenneth Branagh and Larry Mullen Jr..in my dreams!

  41. really says:

    HOE.

  42. azurea says:

    @kasper…You get the prize for best comment! With 10 words you said more than anyone — though there were some choice ones here!

  43. Dirty Martini says:

    He definitely moisters my nether regions. He’s just too fine. Something that fine is meant to be sharedd. Anyone know anyone to whom he has promised fidelity? If not — who cares? Share the love baby.

  44. Enny says:

    Now I’m just really dying to know the full extent of his “relationship” with Liz Taylor.

  45. Juu says:

    Next he’s going to say he just need to find the righ woman. Yeah, Colin, we believe you, except that we don’t. Here’s my phone number in case you need some monogamy nights, though. 😀

  46. gia says:

    Every time I see him I’m reminded of the Lucky Charms leprechaun. “They’re always after me lucky charms”:)

  47. xploxite says:

    Hottttttttttttttt

  48. T. Redd says:

    Who cares WHAT he says? Just stand there and look pretty, Baby.

  49. Gayle says:

    CF’s a cute little leprechaun, even tho he’s a right mess.