Whoopi Goldberg questions Oksana Grigorieva’s motivations


In preparation to write this story, I finally listed to the second and third tapes of Mel Gibson going off like a crazed vindictive lunatic on the mother of his youngest child. It was so f’cking scary and uncomfortable to listen to and it made my heart leap to hear the awful things this man was spewing. I don’t blame Oksana for taping this evil raging abusive creep and I don’t blame her for releasing it. It was disgusting, mean and contained the worst most creatively cruel insults I’ve ever heard. I will never see another film this man is in, and I’ve never said that about any other celebrity, including Tom ‘cult spokesman’ Cruise. Yes, Oksana was aware she was being taped and Mel wasn’t. There is no excuse on this earth for the things that Mel said and did.

In the third tape, Oksana defended herself against claims that she’s a gold digger. Yes she was speaking for an audience but that doesn’t mean it’s not true. She said she’d dedicated her life to Mel in the last three years, that he controlled her money and career and that “I’m not a user. I’m not a gold digger. I don’t have any money and no property assigned to me. That’s a gold digger for you?

Yesterday we heard Whoopi “it wasn’t rape rape” Goldberg say on The View that Mel Gibson couldn’t be a racist because he’d been over to her house and around her kids. Today she went after Oksana for releasing the tapes, saying she wondered why she’d done it. It doesn’t matter why Oksana did it, the tapes are out there and Mel Gibson is the scum of the earth. I personally think she was sick of being vilified by the press and was honestly fearful for her and her daughter’s safety, but if she did it just for money or revenge does it matter? Mel still said those terrible bottom-feeding things. He said things I could never imagine saying to my worst enemy. He never apologized but instead issued a statement to People about how he was doing as if he was the victim!

The conversation on The View today continued in that “poor Mel” vein, with Elisabeth and Sherri saying they loved Passion of The Christ and that they’d pray for him! Whoopi then kind of identified with Mel and said she felt sorry for him while Joy tried to give her a reality check.

Whoopi: Thank God none of us are going through it. You know what I mean? There but for the grace of God go we.

Joy [wide eyed]: I wouldn’t be in that position. I don’t really identify with this at all.

Whoopi: Maybe you wouldn’t hit somebody and you wouldn’t allow somebody to hit you. You wouldn’t tape somebody yelling at you on the phone.

Joy: I would do that. If I were in her position. I would have done the exact [same] thing…

Whoopi: Why not take it to the police and say this is what’s happening? Why is at the tab[loids]… This is the thing that bothers me. If there’s a beef, take it to the cops, to the people that can take care of it. To release it…

If somebody is kicking your behind and punching you in your face while you’re holding their kid you don’t go to the cops first, you go to Radar Online.

Joy: But she did get a restraining order. It’s not like she didn’t cover herself.

[Transcribed from The View, aired 7-13-10]

Whoopi is putting a spin on the “blame the victim” mentality that is sadly way too common. It’s not Oksana’s fault that Mel talked to her like that. It’s not anyone’s fault ever if someone talks to them like that. There’s no excuse for that, period. To the women who are defending Mel and still blaming Oksana: If you are experiencing anything like this, please talk to someone outside of your situation that can help you. You need to get help right away. It is not your fault and you cannot prevent it and you cannot change him.

You know, the more I listen to Mel go off the more I realize why Oksana released the tapes. She may want some money, but more than that she wants us to witness the crazy and to realize what she put up with. I hope she’s safe and I’m glad that this came to light. No one should ever be treated this way. Doesn’t this make you wonder what Robyn silently put up with?

Thanks to Gawker for the video and heads up.

Actor Mel Gibson and Oksana Grigorieva pose during the Spanish premiere of the film Edge of Darkness in Madrid in this February 1, 2010 file photo. Los Angeles County Sheriffs department said July 8, 2010 they are looking into claims that Oscar-winning Gibson physically abused his former girlfriend and the mother of one of his children. REUTERS/Juan Medina/Files  (SPAIN - Tags: ENTERTAINMENT CRIME LAW)

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145 Responses to “Whoopi Goldberg questions Oksana Grigorieva’s motivations”

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  1. tooey says:

    I really wanted to give Mel the benefit of the doubt, but after listening to these tapes it’s clear he’s batshit crazy. I wouldn’t be surprised if he went O.J. on Oksana. She may be a gold digger (now I’m not so sure) but I have no doubt that she truly fears for her and her child’s safety.

  2. xxodettexx says:

    before i even read this, my first thought is:

    OF COURSE whoopi is questioning oksana’s motivation! after all, maybe its not abuse-abuse??? [just like polanski didnt rape-rape a child!]

    whoopi and all abuser apologists make me sick…

  3. Me1st says:

    maybe one of those affairs that Whoppi had was with Mel

  4. Obvious says:

    it’s disgusting, and i’m sorry if my comments on the earlier post were pro Mel. They weren’t intended to be. I still haven’t had a chance to listen to the 3rd tape, but i still find it bizarre-even though she knew she was being taped that she spoke the way she did. like she was reading a script.

    Mel needs a pysch eval, go through anger management, spend some time in jail (lots), lose his money and his fans and then maybe then let him into the world-with a court mandated sponser who could lock him back up.

  5. susieqinBA says:

    Whoopi if you are truly a “friend” of Mel’s then you would HELP him to confront HIS wrongdoings and HELP him to take responsibility for his actions and not to put it off on the other person; Oksana HAS NOT SHOWN violent rage and Mel HAS. Let’s address the right issue here! There are some people who do hear Mel’s cry for help (he is hurting so deeply) but he is not going to get help from “friends” who AVOID confronting his VIOLENT behavior! A true friend may have to cut off friendship with the man, isolate him, shut him out, and confront him to make him deal with his ego and weaknesses and abusive behaviors. He brought this upon himself and he needs to get the revelation of that in order that he will be humbled. At this point Oksana’s “motives” are justifiable, Mel’s are not! Another “celebrity” is not what he needs or what will help him.

  6. Jennifer says:

    1. Has there been any proof or interview w/ his ex-wife where she has stated that Mel ever was violent or offensive? Did she ever have to take out restraining orders for herself or their children?

    2. Oksana looks like a slightly prettier version of the Octomom – both of whom make my skin crawl. They both just seem to have that ‘look’ on their faces. Why put all of this out into the media? If she is truly afraid for her child and herself, she should be working with lawyers and cops to ensure their safety. Not spending time with tabloids and paps trying to get her woe is me story splashed on every mag cover and website.

    3. Some of you would be AMAZED at what a c**t bag woman can do to a man’s psyche. I’ve witnessed, firsthand, a gold-digging wench completely and utterly torment her baby daddy over and over and over again until he thought he was losing his mind. And she would do it all with the softest voice and the sweetest smile on her demonic face.

    4. You reap what you sow. Oksana is no innocent. She happily had an affair with a married man with seven children. She had no problem causing unspeakable pain to another woman and her family. But now, since she is the one dealing with pain, we should all bow down and weep with her? Puleeze. She wanted to steal herself a man, that’s what she got, suck it up.

  7. lucy2 says:

    Oh Whoopi. Seriously time to SHUT IT.
    I’m wondering if she knew the media would be the best place to expose him, rather than something that might be kept hush hush by the police. Now that EVERYONE knows what he’s like, she’s got some safety from him. Maybe it was the smart move after all?

    If Whoopi doesn’t want to bash her friend Mel, perhaps she should just opt out of the discussion. Perpetuating a “blame the victim” mentality, especially on a female oriented show, is disgraceful.

  8. GrnMtGirl says:

    I totally back Oksana for taping and releasing the tapes. I would do it too, especially to let the world know what she has been dealing with. I don’t think it had anything to do with money.

    I can’t believe the things that he was saying to her and the names that he was calling her. How vile!!

    And, yes, I too wonder what Robin had to deal with in all the years she was married to him.

  9. Praise St. Angie! says:

    so, we have Whoopi “its not rape rape” Goldberg, Sherry “the earth is flat” Sheppard, and Elisabeth “I cry whenever I’m challenged on my parroting of Fox News half-truths” Hasselcrack…

    honestly, who cares what ANY of them think? bunch of mensa candidates right there, huh? UGH…

    oh, and to Jennifer…

    “1. Has there been any proof or interview w/ his ex-wife where she has stated that Mel ever was violent or offensive? Did she ever have to take out restraining orders for herself or their children?”

    irrelevant to this case. I know people keep wondering, but whether or not he abused Robyn doesn’t matter.

    “Why put all of this out into the media? If she is truly afraid for her child and herself, she should be working with lawyers and cops to ensure their safety.”

    um, she DID work with a lawyer and cops. she has a restraining order against him. what else can she legally do? and she (or her friend) put it out into the media to prevent a whitewashing of his character/behavior. would anyone believe her if she hadn’t taped him and the tapes got out? no, we’d all believe the big rich movie star.

    “Some of you would be AMAZED at what a c**t bag woman can do to a man’s psyche. I’ve witnessed, firsthand, a gold-digging wench completely and utterly torment her baby daddy over and over and over again until he thought he was losing his mind. And she would do it all with the softest voice and the sweetest smile on her demonic face.”

    not amazed…I know there are women out there that are just as emotionally abusive as a man can be, BUT…there is no evidence that she did any of those things.

    “Oksana is no innocent. She happily had an affair with a married man with seven children.”

    yup, she did…a married man whose marriage, for all intents and purposes, was already over. again, this is IRRELEVANT to the issue. if my man left me for another woman and he beat her, I would NEVER say “she got what she wanted…she should suck it up”.

    • mare w says:

      Just wanted to add some Dentists,not on Gibson’s defense team dispute that the injury occurred like she claims it did, plus how do you know it wasn’t self-inflicted or done by someone else ? I didn’t know until I read elsewhere but she was trying to get 20% for him instead of 50% because with 20% in CA
      you get a lot of cild support which is something you have to consider with her motives. Just consider it.

  10. xxodettexx says:

    as for elisabeth and sherri, since they want to bring religion into this…

    Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Ephesians 4:31

    If a man says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who doesn’t love his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen? 1 John 4:20

  11. Lucy says:

    If he was a better person, he wouldn’t have cheated on his wife and left her.

    If she really was tormenting him for money, he could have calmly outlined an agreement. Covering financial and custody issues.

    My personal opinion, his ex wife had the same kind of documentation as Oksana, but threatened him. She probably figured if she let it out, he may not work again, and there goes her alimony and child support, not entirely but you know.

    Of course, I could be entirely wrong – JUST my opinion.

  12. guesty says:

    um…stfu whoopi. u r not the period at the end of every sentence.

  13. sapphire says:

    Oh puhleeze. Like everybody didn’t know since the first incident that Mel was crazy-including this twit? And she didn’t hang up the phone? Or put down the script? Or call her lawyer for maximum leverage?
    What’s sad is Oxana is having a ball destroying a clearly disturbed individual’s career who is her kid’s dad. I haven’t seen any proof yet of a criminal act. Which of these two opportunists is going to explain to the child why mom set up and tried to extort money from a lunatic. And why she stayed.

  14. albeli says:

    Whoopi, STFU. Nobody deserves that kind of abuse, not even gold diggers.

  15. Jackson says:

    @Jennifer – I hope some man never thinks that YOU have ‘that look’ on YOUR face. If he does, you might want to duck and cover and then look for your teeth on the floor.

    And there goes Whoopi again, trying to defend her celebrity friends. This is so irritating and off-putting. We get it, Whoopi. You all are in a different universe than the rest of us peons and we just don’t understand the pain of your celebrity. Whatever.

  16. Kiska says:

    Joy Behar is the only one of The View who isn’t a delusional nitwit.These women are completely out of touch! Hasselbeck is a given, the way she went after Erin Andrews and her “inappropriate outfits” on DWTS. Sherry, well she doesn’t seem to be the brightest bulb in the bunch. However, Whoopi, she should know better. I was disgusted how they defended Mel’s behaviour. Does he really have such power in Hollywood?

  17. Tia C says:

    @ Praise St. Angie: LOL! Way to summarize those 3!

    The fact of the matter is that nobody knows for SURE who released these tapes. Didn’t Oksana give copies to the court or the police? So it could have theoretically been someone else who released them. And even if she did, so what? As GrnMtGirl pointed out, now the world knows who he really is. Oksana played a part in the relationship, but no matter what part she played, she didn’t deserve to be spoken to so cruelly or abused in any way. Her voice does sound scripted and like she’s acting on those tapes, but again, so what? It all served a purpose, and her wallet is not getting any fatter, so that wasn’t the purpose.

    I have always really liked Whoopi Goldberg, but in recent years she’s kind of gone off the deep end of extreme way-out liberalism. Trust me, I am no conservative, far from it, but she is too far out there for me! Blaming victims and sticking up for despicable men. Get a grip Whoopi!

  18. K-MAC says:

    really Whoopi? Just gross and disgusting. Was Whoopi the one who was dating Ted Danson and got him to portray himself in “blackface” at a roast or a party and when the press and people raked him over the coals, she dumped him?

    Yeah, she is a real class act.

  19. irishserra says:

    @Jennifer: Praise St. Angie is absolutely right! He could have been perfect up until this point and none of that matters right now in this situation. He is an adult man accountable for his current behavior, which is RIGHT NOW deplorable, regardless of Oksana’s behavior.

    What needs to be addressed right now is the danger that Mel poses to his child, mother of his child, and any other individual who crosses his path and displeases him.

    Oksana’s actions are a separate matter and absolutely not relevant to what Mel is doing.

  20. Hess says:

    LOL fuuunnny!!! Whoopi thinks Mel respects her?? omg too funny. Hey, Whoopi, he probably had a hey day trashin you behind your back all those times he was leavin your place. You’re on thin ice baby, all celebrities who feel obligated to voice their two cents pro Mel ought to watch what will happen – Whoopi tends to think her shit don’t stink, but if she keeps talkin bullshit for an abuser, I can grantee she will not last long on a show where the audience majority are WOMEN. What a joke!!

  21. Jennifer says:

    @Jennifer – I hope some man never thinks that YOU have ‘that look’ on YOUR face. If he does, you might want to duck and cover and then look for your teeth on the floor.

    Thankfully, I am not an opportunistic hag who requires a man and his money to feel like I have achieved my goals in life. So it’s not a problem, but thanks for your concern!

  22. jane16 says:

    Whoopi disgusts me. I used to like her, years ago, but she has turned out to be woman’s worst friend.

    Everyone in H’wood has known for years and years what a total asshole Gibson is, but H’wood has a freaky tendency to shield their own. A lot of us were happy for Robyn when she finally had enough & walked away. I have heard dozens of stories from various people over the years about their scary experiences with this lunatic. I’m glad Oksana had the moxie to out this jerk. I hope she’ll be safe, and can raise her kid in peace.

    • mare w says:

      I have a real problem with people throwing around terms like nut, crazy and lunatic when describing a person with a mental illness, like Gibson. These are very harmful terms and disrespectful of people who are unfortunate to suffer from such conditions. These terms are just as bad as gold-digger, slut, “she was asking for it”. People with mental illness often avoid treatment because of social attitudes reflected by such terms and the awful labeling/stigmatizing effect. Read about severe cycling bi-polar disorder which is what I think Gibson has and until now the Hollywood establishment shielded him because he was making them money,instead of making him get treatment. usual story. A person in bi-polar also doesn’t have the clarity to realize they need help it’s up to those around them to get them treated. Alcohlism, drug use are a big part of self-medication for untreated patients and hyper-sexuality plus poor judgement in choice of partners is also a hallmark of it.
      ps. I hate to say but when you accuse anyone of a crime or say

      • mare w says:

        Ps. I have a relative and have known other people with this disorder. Depending upon it’s severity if their medication is off it can set them off on a vicious streak esp. when in a severe manic state with accompanying paranoia. They can get vicious in speech and start fights. They don’t have the judgement. An imbalance for those even receiving treatment in medication can happen from something as simple as becoming dehyrated from sweating too much on a hot day. If you’re not used to dealing with them it can be very upsetting.

        Plus maybe she’s the victim here but I know from my experience with people with bi-polar they are often taken advantage of by unscrupulous jerks. I know this first-hand from seeing it happen to people close to me suffering from this condition. Just some food for thought here.

  23. jane16 says:

    Praise St. Angie, bravo & well said!

  24. irl says:

    They both suck. I can’t stand or feel bad for either one of them.
    Mel is totally spewing verbal abuse and she should have left.
    I can see that skank staying and provoking him even more so she can make her recordings and jack Mel up for money, for fame, for attention, for public sympathy.
    I’m agreeing with Jennifer and Sapphire about her. She’s been suspect from the start of hooking up with Mel and now she’s proven that suspision was just.
    She should have got out a looooong time ago if he was scaring her. But she didn’t – she stayed to tape and take advantage of a severely messed up drunken pig.

  25. nycmom10024 says:

    Maybe the first wife is quiet because of her reputed settlement and her children are grown. They know what went on in that home she had a reason to remain quiet.

    To the brain trust that is Whoopie but did he ever invite you into his home? One thing to come to yours, another to invite you to his.

    To you folks still defending poor Mel, I’d love to hear your thoughts on Polanski, Chris Brown, et al

    I will gladly pray for them all, but two are criminals and the other probably is as well.

    • mare w says:

      Oh I definitely as I said above believe Gibson is suffering from a serious mental illness (Though calling such a person a lunatic is very smallminded)but I’d liked to know if there was any of his DNA traces on her teeth and soft tissue. This would be a big factor.

  26. Praise St. Angie! says:

    “I am not an opportunistic hag who requires a man and his money to feel like I have achieved my goals in life.”

    and you don’t have to be to wind up in an abusive relationship. It can happen to anyone. celebrity or not, rich or not, opportunistic hag or not.

  27. Jennifer says:

    @irishserra: What needs to be addressed right now is the danger that Mel poses to his child, mother of his child, and any other individual who crosses his path and displeases him.
    Oksana’s actions are a separate matter and absolutely not relevant to what Mel is doing.

    My bad, I wasn’t aware he was arrested or charged with any crime. Did I miss that post? All he has done is rant and rave like a nutjob. *IF* he did crack her upside the head, then I think he should be punished to the fullest extent of the law. But so far as I can tell, everyone is ready to start the lynch mob cuz he is a magnanamous jerk. If that’s the case, you all will be very busy because 90% of the population are giant a**holes too. Hope you don’t run out of sticks and stones!

    Oh, and Oksana’s actions kinda do matter – if you are insisting you are terrified for your life, then you get your kid and you get as far away from the man as you possibly can. Quietly and with the assistance of law enforcement. You don’t let him know your every move via the internet. Unreal.

  28. Jeri says:

    Yes, it does make you wonder about Robyn. Also, I think the tapes would have been squelched if she had gone through normal legal channels (just as they tried to squech the 1st rant before it was leaked). This was the only way to get it out there (I believe).

    Go Joy Go!

    • mare w says:

      I know alot of celebs get away with ahem murder like O.J. and runner up Lindsay Lohan. However if by “sqelching” you mean through out of court or by “sqelching” you mean not open to the public via media outlets is interesting.

  29. LindaR says:

    @Jennifer please explain what being an opportunistic hag has with getting hit by your partner while holding your baby. Please explain what one has to do with the other because there is no place on this earth where it should be ok to hit and verbally and emotionally abuse anyone for any reason. So enlighten all of us, will you? You seem to have a lot to say about this. And see if you can do it without resorting to the same behaviour Gibson uses ie. sarcasm, putdowns, name-calling etc.

  30. Patrice says:

    Ok, um, not to be one to point out the obvious here, but is there a sane, stable person ALIVE that wouldn’t question Oksana’s “motives”??? I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why Mel Gibson would risk his entire family to be with her, but the only explanation I can gather is that bitch runs a hell of a game on stupid, filthy rich men, and they are just horny/insane enough (in Mel’s case) to fall for it. What a bunch of losers.

  31. TaylorB says:

    #17 (can’t read the name, sorry)

    Do not say Whoopies behaviour is ‘liberalism’, this is NOT a liberal vs. conservative issue and it is wrong to try and turn it into one.

  32. Patrice says:

    #6 Jennifer: I couldn’t put my own thoughts about this into words any better!!!! Although I don’t think ANYONE not even someone as disgusting as Oksana deserves physical abuse (if that’s even true which at this point…who knows)

  33. Jennifer says:

    My point, very simply and yes rather snidely stated, but entirely missed, is that NO ONE on these boards or anywhere else KNOWS for a FACT that any crime was committed. No one KNOWS anything beyond the rantings of a jackass on the phone to his ex-girlfriend. Is it mean as hell to do that to someone? Absolutely. Do we KNOW based on Oksana’s scripted sentences exactly what Mel has or has not done? No. Did I ever say it was ok to hit someone? Please pull the sentence where I wrote that. What I have said, and would continue to say, is that if you play with fire, you damn well should expect to get burned. I don’t know this mans life history (though many here seem to claim this knowledge) – so if he has been a nutjob for years and years, and Oksana knew full well what he was capable of, what in the world was she doing dating him and having a child with him? I am in the camp of “you are an adult and you make choices, and if you know you are taking a risk to get a gain, well, hey, that’s life”. Anyone who abuses should absolutely be punished, but if someone KNOWINGLY dates, and possibly provokes, an abusive man, sorry, you are not getting my sympathy. I am NOT saying that abusing someone is RIGHT, I am saying you can’t bitchslap a Rottweiler and then wonder wtf it bit your ass off!

  34. The_Porscha says:

    @Jennifer: please stop blaming the victim. No woman or man deserves abuse in any capacity, and indicating otherwise is dangerous and despicable. There’s no karma that leads to a woman being hit/beaten, regardless of how their relationship started.

  35. OXA says:

    After 30 years of being browbeaten and abused by Mad Mel his ex-wife is probably shell shocked and just trying to protect and raise her last child.
    Who knows what damage was done to the family living under this maniacs reign of terror.
    Also I think Jennifer could be an abuser herself and is unable find sympathy for the victim.

  36. nnn says:

    And i am questionning Whoopi’s motivations in defending Mel !

    Is she in love with him ? Is she her lover ?

  37. Belle Epoch says:

    Team Kiska!

    Whoopi also revealed her true colors when she defended Michael Vick over dogfighting. How you can twist around your logic to make brutal animal maiming and killing “understandable” is beyond me.

  38. carrie says:

    if Whoopy knows Gibson and she’s his friend,why mightn’t she defend him?

    i yet had a very nasty break-up and no holds barred:i was a real prick with him(i’m not proud here) and he had been a real jerk with me

    another side:my cousin works at L’ami Louis in Paris and he gave dinner to Gibson,Oksana and Dicaprio in february this year and he says between Gibson and his girlfriend,it wasn’t very “fall in love”

  39. Mistral says:

    Mel is lucky he still has friends. Friends are willing to forgive friends quite a lot. That said, I agree with the above poster who said that his friends shouldn’t shun him, but they should confront him and try to force him to get help.

  40. Kiska says:

    @jane16 – Well said. Whoopi is definitely a “woman’s worst friend.”

  41. Steve22 says:

    @ Jennifer Yes we do know a crime was committed because Mel admitted to it and said “You deserved it”. He also threatened to kill her and hit her in the side of a head with a baseball bat. He is in trouble under the law just for those threats. Since she signed a paper agreeing she would get none of his money how is she a gold digger? As for the wiretapping, under California law abused women are allowed to tape the abuser so in a nut shell he is toast.

  42. eja102 says:

    please stop asking jennifer to explain herself.
    my eyes are bleeding reading her rhetoric.

  43. Praise St. Angie! says:

    Jennifer, your point, while valid, was missed because it was not very well articulated. most people saw your posts as simply defending MG and implying that she was somehow responsible because she 1)provoked him and 2)didn’t leave right away or 3)”knew what she was getting into”. (and, reading back on them now, your first post says NOTHING about the “point” you were allegedly trying to make. nor did your second post…)

    but, let’s address that point.

    no, no one but Mel and Oksana know for sure what happened. however, she has pictures of after she was beaten, the dentist has made statements to the cops (as he was a witness to the injuries) and MG has essentially admitted, on those tapes, that he hit her and that she “deserved it”.

    so, if we are to rely ONLY on “the rantings of a jackass on the phone to his ex-girlfriend”, and in said rantings he ADMITS TO HITTING HER, I’d say we can say with some degree of certainty that we know what happened.

    one more thing, as you’ve told us how we “don’t know for sure” what went on, you don’t know for sure WHAT Oksana knew about him when she hooked up with him. sure, she knew he would cheat on his wife. she probably knew that he had issues with alcohol (who didn’t?) but to assume that she knew just how abusive and psychotic he can be is not fair. but hey, if you have info we don’t…that is, if you have some sort of knowledge that she knew his true character and hooked up with him anyway, please share it.

  44. JJ says:

    Agree with Patrice, above. It’s definitely fair to question her motivation.

    Mel’s disgusting, yes, but how can you possibly know that Oksana’s a victim? She preyed upon a rich, falling-down-drunk asshole. Would’ve been easier for her if he was just rich, without the drunk asshole part, but that’s what she got. And instead of walking away, she brought a baby into the mess.

    If someone talked to me like that, guess what? I’d hang up on them! The whole recording and releasing to the tabloids is disgusting in its own way.

    They are both gross.

  45. Jennifer says:

    Nope, not an abuser. Loving wife and mother of a 13 month old son. Just tired of the “I’ll do whatever I feel like whenever I feel like it and if something bad happens because of my bad actions, well then that’s BAD and you should all feel REALLY really bad for me, ok?” I dated an abusive guy (emotionally, not physically) and when I realized what was going on – I left him. I realize it’s not that easy for everyone, but I also realize that as adults we have the responsiblity to take care of ourselves and accept the outcomes of the actions we take. Again, I did NOT EVER SAY IT WAS RIGHT FOR ANYONE TO BE ABUSED. I simply said I am not going to feel horrible for someone if it was provoked or known about beforehand. For example: Scott Peterson is a convicted murderer – not a woman alive who doesn’t know what he was put in prison for. If he got out, and a woman married him, and ended up murdered, should I cry and feel sorry for her? Why would you walk into the lion’s den and expect to live? Am I talking to brick walls here? Ugh. If you guys want to throw your sympathy her way, great, but I will reserve mine for those who unwittingly get the bum rush.

  46. Steve22 says:

    @ JJ Listen to the audio again. She is about to hang up several times and he screams at her to NOT hang up and then he threatens to come over and do who knows what to her if she does hang up. She stayed on because he was threatening her. We do know the facts. He admitted to hitting her and was proud of it and he threatened to kill her. He broke the law and is a scum bag. What more do you want?

  47. irl says:

    still agreeing w/Jennifer. . .
    Good point. . .can’t mess with fire and not expect to get burned.

    Also. . . I keep hearing Octosana say he bust out a front tooth or two?
    Wouldn’t she have gone to an ER or a dentist?
    Is there a medical report or dentist report or any proof?

  48. Crash2GO2 says:

    Jennifer, it sounds to me like you still have some issues to work out.

    Best to you.

  49. Steve22 says:

    @ Jennifer What do you think she was doing? She WAS leaving him and that is why she had a restraining order against him. However, in most cases that kind verbal, mental and physical abuse leaves women with such low self-esteem and the abuser sets things up to where they are dependent on them the women are more afraid of leaving than staying because they think they are worthless. The other men she has been with did not beat her. Do you really think she knew she was going to get her teeth knocked in and degraded like that when she got into the relationship? Of course not, these kind of men are manipulators who are very charming at first. I am sure she was star struck at first and then was hit with reality.

    • mare w says:

      for further details see my other posts please. I just have to say why did she get involved with a married man ? Where are her morals too ? You can’t quote to me about Timothy Dalton (Whom I like) since 1. His son only heard part of the altercation, 2. TD only knows from his son, whom of course he’s going to want to protect and try to keep out of that mess the best he can so it can’t be cited as proof about mel since it’s basically heresy.

    • mare w says:

      I do admire though your willingness to stand up for women you feel are being mistreated. It’s admirable.

  50. sapphire says:

    I think this is completely unfair to Jennifer-throwing stones at a poster. And since we haven’t seen the picture, the statement etc., still no evidence.
    For example, IF the dentist relays what was told to him by the woman, is it any more reliable?

    You know, for all the finger pointing, and “blame the victim” cries, I really haven’t seen anyone say it could not have happened or that the guy shouldn’t be jailed (and sued) if it did.

    Which reminds me…why didn’t she file a civil action?

  51. dj says:

    Does anyone remember Nicole Brown Simpson? She went to the police, had restraining orders, call 911, etc.

  52. meme says:

    WTF is going on in Hollyweird? Is there something in the water?

  53. OC lady says:

    @Jennifer. It seems like you haven’t listened to the tapes. On the second tape, the first thing he says is “you better stay on the phone because I have the energy to drive down there and I WILL!!!” He screamed the last part. So, it’s clear to me that he was forcing her to listen to him, or he wouldn’t have said that. She must have hung up on him before or tried to get away. It’s a clear threat also.

    This guy is sick and nothing excuses his behavior. NOTHING. And, you can’t say she knew what he was like going in. You can’t presume that you know Oksana. It’s pure BS speculation on your part. And, I don’t care if Oksana is stealing money from his wallet at night, NOTHING excuses violence. NOTHING. On the tapes, he admitted to beating her with their child in her hands, claiming she deserved it, and has threatened to kill her. It’s NOT acceptable.

    It makes me sad that there are women out there who will let abusers off the hook for their behavior if the victim isn’t a saint. That’s BEYOND ridiculous.

    @Praise. Well said and I totally agree.

  54. TaylorB says:

    #47 (can’t read the name, sorry)

    From what I have read she did go to a dentist, he is testifying in her case and took photos.

    Jennifer,

    I don’t think that, unlike Charlie Sheen (I can not imagine why any woman would date him, hell he even shot one of his exes… but I digress), Mel had ever been publically accused of abuse before so how would she know? So how did she knowingly step into a lions den? Sure she is a skank for banging a married dude, but does that mean that she ‘knew’ what she was getting into? I highly doubt that is the case.

    Not to mention your arguement, that you ‘get what you ask for’ sort of sounds like the old ‘she was dressed slutty so she deserved to get raped’. No dress or attitude is a viable excuse for being punched in the face, I don’t care if she is the biggest b*tch in the world, that does not mean it is ok to hit her.

  55. LOVE ANGELINA says:

    @Jen I gotta say while alot of us knew Mel was kinda of a jerk and racist…we had no idea he was hitting a woman holding his daughter or saying he would murder said woman. Calling her every vile name in the book. No one knew he was this abusive. We all assumed he was just a racist drunk but this man is so much more than that. He was married for several years to ONE woman. Who would think a man married to ONE woman for several years is capable of this? Its easy to see how Oskana wouldn’t think to much into dating him despite his drunken past. Hell we only knew he liked the sauce. So while you use Scott Peterson as example, your right, not one woman would touch his ass now, expect those crazy ones who write to axe murders, but no sane woman. Thats because there is an established case against him. However Mel didn’t have that, not even the sugertits incident showed that Mel was knocking people’s teeth out. So its not fair to say Oksana knew what she was getting herself into, I seriously doubt that.

  56. Bill Hicks is God says:

    She should change her name to Whoopi Copperberg for all the 2 cents she’s throwing around.

  57. GrnMtGirl says:

    This conversation just pisses me off.

    Abusers make it real difficult for the abused to really believe that they are in fact being abused…They often feel like there must be something wrong with themselves for having provoked someone to the point that they lashed out. Abusers also make the good times so good that when they step out of line the abused often justifies the behavior of the abuser and blame themselves. “Oh, he was just having a bad day,” “He had too much to drink,” “I pushed his buttons.”

    I don’t find it hard to believe that he charmed the pants off of this girl. Yeah, maybe she played a role in breaking up his marriage, but isn’t he completely responsible for his cheating behavior? He could have said no…not that difficult to be an upstanding, faithful, committed partner to your wife if you are not a despicable opportunist.

    An abuser can always find a way to “explain” his behavior. But, I have to say that I find his rant to be completely disgusting and there really isn’t any good excuse for treating someone that way even if they are themselves not a nice person. I’ve never heard anyone speak to anyone so violently.

    Yes, she taped him and yes she did kind of sound scripted, but he was still the one who went wayyyy off the deep end. There is no excuse to call someone the names he was calling her and there certainly is not excuse for his repeated racist remarks. He is not a nice person.

  58. viper says:

    YOU MEL DEFENDERS ARE UNETHICAL.

    It does NOT MATTER who instigated what the fact that mel has a short fuse and is violent towards a woman is ENOUGH. The man is 54 years old not 24, he should have had enough life experience and be rational enough to know the difference between WALKING AWAY and constantly reigniting a heated argument then losing it. It is his OWN fault regardless of how it came into being public.

    Also, whoopie goldburg… lost my respect a LONG time ago. I’d sooner ask a toilet for it’s opinion than hers with the crap she spews from her mouth.

    AS FOR THE TEETH

    A trip to the denist is all that is needed. I know because when I was young a friend sleeping over fell in the tub and knock out two front teeth when she was changing the temp of teh water and the cold startled her- so we took her to a clinic the next day. If you save them they can be easily reattached or replaced. Its an in and out deal one hour and you’re done. IF YOU SAVE THE TEETH. Now if the teeth were sort of just hanging off there it would take alot longer.

  59. GrnMtGirl says:

    @ irl: Her name is Oksana and yes she did go to the dentist. He has given a statement and has pictures.

  60. Jessie says:

    @Jennifer:

    I’ll have to take another look at the law books. I didn’t know that if someone didn’t like the way you look, or just think that maybe, JUST MAYBE, you were dating someone for their money, that the same rules don’t apply. I also wasn’t aware that you get a free pass if someone “should know” that you may have anger issues or an alcohol problem. Beat up your wife/husband, your kids, hey, they should have known better!

  61. S says:

    First, Mel Gibson is a sick and deranged individual who needs serious help. I don’t know if jail is the most productive place for him, though with his anger, I’m sure he’d win a few brawls; but he definitely needs somewhere where he’s locked away and receives serious psychological help.

    As I’ve grown up into my 20s, I’m trying to mature my thinking too and remember that nobody deserves bad things happening to them, even if they are really horrible people. I don’t think an eye for an eye is fair or productive, and what good is it to sink down and behave poorly yourself?

    This brings me to Oksana. I can understand wanting to ruin someone who has hurt you so severely, but I think that is where, as a person and a mother, you have to show restraint. Yes, by all means, tape the conversations and destroy him in court and file police reports and get him away from you. But releasing them to the public and using the media, it just looks petulent and vindictive. And we have to remember that Mel is still Lucia’s father. She may not ever know him, and that might be better for her – we certainly should not judge that, but I do think it is important for children to know their parents and it is counterproductive for them to be aware, either now or in the future, of one parent publicly sabotaging the other. She will find out what Mel did and make her own decisions about him. Does Oksana want her making decisions about her mother’s actions as well? That is teaching your child that it is okay to be vindictive, and that is not a good trait. Celebrities need to remember that their children will google them, and once out in the realm of the internet, it is out there for good!

    So please, Oksana, get away from him forever, but you don’t have to do it in the tabloids. It doesn’t make you look very good, and it isn’t good for your children, or, frankly, Mel’s children. Children love their parents – even if they are bad, they love them. Most of his kids are grown and maybe they will be able to encourage him to REALLY get help this time. Hopefully he will do it for them.

  62. Alias says:

    I cannot for the life of me figure out why Whoopi is defending both Mel Gibson and Roman Polanski. One has physically and mentally abused a woman in the most despicable way AND revealed himself to be an ardent anti-semite and bigot, and the other plied a 13 year-old girl with alcohol and drugs so he could sodomize her. Whoopi, give your dreadlocks a good hard shake!

  63. Wif says:

    Here’s my totally uneducated assumption on the Robyn issue; I’m basing this on the way men in my family have behaved.

    When they were first married, and for some time, MG wasn’t crazy and they were really in love, and happy to have their children. They were partners in the business of their family. Then as he grew crazy and they grew apart, while he no longer loved her, he super respected her for their past and her hard work raising their children. So that when the marriage broke up, he didn’t resent her big settlement. And he didn’t emotionally abuse (at least not like this) her because she’d earned his respect.

    With Oksana, I think his main connection to her was sex, and that because they didn’t build anything together, he resents the notion of giving her his money. In his opinion she earned nothing.

    My opinion’s not worth much, but I’ve seen this same mentality in my own family. My uncle has gifted his pension to my aunt regardless their brutal divorce and his new wife’s resentment, because she was with him in the hard years.

  64. haribo says:

    abuse is wrong. be it against oksana or jennifer.

  65. cantbelievethis says:

    @Jennifer How was she too know he was abusive? The only thing in the media was his one drunken DUI rant. My dad is a charmer when he first meets a woman. Once he marries he beats the crap out of them and threatens them if they try to leave. My stepmom tried to kick him out once and he broke her ribs. The police didn’t do anything, neither did social services. My stepmom was the “other woman” when he was married to my mom, however she didn’t deserve what he did to her. The kids in the house didn’t deserve growing up with that either.

    As for taking the baby and getting away from him, she needed proof to do that. I went through a custody issue and even though my ex was unstable I couldn’t do anything without proof. Had I taken off with my child w/o proof I would have been thrown in jail. My lawyer advised me to record phone calls.

    They just need to throw his butt in jail. He hit her (and admitted it)and threatened to kill her.

  66. snap_pea says:

    While Mel’s rants are shocking, despite his previous angry racist crap (and the Jesus Chainsaw Massacre movie), what I really can’t get over are these legions of women who think it’s totally OK for men to threaten to kill their wives, beat them senseless, knock out their teeth, etc.

    With Goldberg, it’s even more disturbing because she’s on a television “news” show aimed at young women. If someone in an abusive situation admires her, and listens to her argument that wives deserve to be beaten, and threatened with oral rape, burning, murder, etc by their husbands… will it be more difficult for them to seek help? I bet in some cases it will. I believe in freedom of speech, but I hope women stop watching The View. I will.

  67. irl says:

    Michael K devotee. . .octosana works for me.
    Wonder if Mel really knocked her teeth out or if she rammed her face into something . . .so she could say he did it.

  68. Jules says:

    Kiss Hollywood’s ass much Whoopie?

  69. Taradash says:

    believe it or not, i once taped a rant of an abusive ex. I was so tormented by his verbal abusive, he was one way with everyone and a sinster way with me. He had me believing and others that i was making it up

    abusive people suck

  70. sylph says:

    I do think she may have been a bit of an opportunist. She may have a history with alcoholics (she’s Russian right?) and figure she could handle that especially in the early days when Gibson was no doubt infatuated with her…

    But I doubt she knew he would hit her while holding their child. I think she released the tapes in part to protect herself because she honestly believes that he could kill her. He is a man who loves to wallow in his rage and unhappiness, and much of that is directed at her. Who knows what he is capable of, especially when drinking…but this puts everyone on notice.

  71. nnn says:

    Whoopi is sickennig, questionning the motivations of the victim and never the ones of the abuser.

    This is a woman who has dated married men and who probably have has those suspiscion of goldigging thrown at her and the only thing she does is back up a guy who admitted hitting his lover because ‘he used to see her and her children’, then he is a good, decent man ?.

    And since when having a black friend makes you de facto unracist towards his/her ethnicity ? How many times people would vilify one group and say, hey, but you are different ?

    She is stupid but her stupidity is criminal because she always back assholes who abuse women and children.

    That’s why Mel is a despicable mysoginistic ass, cause if it was just about drug and alcohol, you would have heard him having troubles with men too…No he deliberatly chose his victims, those he will belittle, trash, dehumanize. Those victims are the weakest and defenseless ones.

    CRIMINAL MINDSET to the core.

  72. Ron says:

    I wonder if Mel was talking to Whoopi’s daughter like this if he would still be her “friend and not a racist”? I fmy sister’s husband ever spoke to her like that, ever, there would be a problem with me. Granted she may be a nasty woman, but there is still no excuse. And where is the ex wife Robin? She has been surprisingly silent on all of this, which I think is very telling.

  73. Paula says:

    “She may want some money, but more than that she wants us to witness the crazy and to realize what she put up with. “

    Yes, she did. She continued to live in a house owned by someone who admitted to hitting her in the face and who made threats over the phone. Did she not have even one friend who would open their home to a baby and its mother fleeing a violent partner? I cannot reconcile the notion that Oksana was afraid of Mel with her choice to stay in the house nor do I believe that she had no alternative living arrangements. Who among us doesn’t have even one friend or family member who would shelter us temporarily in a time of great need? Oksana staying in Mel’s house does NOT excuse or mitigate any of Mel’s horrible words or actions, but it is not consistent with a genuine fear of being harmed by him.

  74. Bunnys Blade says:

    I’ve always liked Whoopi and thought she was always telling it like it is BUT She really missed the mark on this one. She’s doing a reverse “I can’t be racist because some of my best friends are Black” claim. I don’t care if Mel fathered Whoopi’s children, he’s still a racist and a blatant misogynist. It’s clear he has hatred towards women.

    It’s exceptionally irresponsible for anyone to defend his behavior.

  75. Steve22 says:

    @ cantbelievethis Very well said. Sorry you and your family had to go through all that.

  76. GC says:

    What has happened here is human behavior at its very worst. But there are TWO people involved here. Two people who engaged in this sick, twisted relationship. They are BOTH equally to blame. And for those of you who want to make a victim out of Oksana, do you mean to tell me that all of sudden she woke up one day and Mel started doing this crazy stuff? No doubt there were signs from the very beginning that he has a screw loose and she CHOSE to stay and she CHOSE to pregnant and CHOSE to involve an innocent child in this. She is not a victim, she is a participant. Unless and until we start realizing WE get to make the choice to continue in relationships with messed up people or not, there will continue to be innocent children created who are the real victims!!

  77. Paula says:

    “As for taking the baby and getting away from him, she needed proof to do that. I went through a custody issue and even though my ex was unstable I couldn’t do anything without proof. Had I taken off with my child w/o proof I would have been thrown in jail. “

    Correct me if I’m wrong, but it is legal for a partner to leave another and take the children as long as the partner stays in the same state. In some states, if you leave without the kids, you could be charged with neglect and risk losing custody rights should you seek them during the divorce. As long as the other partner has access to the kids, I don’t see why a partner seeking a separation must stay in the home unless the partner wishes to hang on to the home after the divorce.

  78. Steve22 says:

    @ Paula She had NO legal authority to take the child away from Mel. That is what all this is about. Why she recorded the phone calls and got a restraining order. And now she is taking your advice, so does she get any credit for that? Abused women are damned if the do and damned if they don’t. The bastard busted her face! What about that do you not get? Why some of you go after the abused and not that raving maniac is absolutely stunning! It’s really very sad!

  79. Moriah says:

    Eat a bowl of di*k’s, Jennifer.

  80. Uzi says:

    @Wif…Love your assumption, which is definitely NOT uneducated! The story I’ve always heard is that when Mel and Robyn first met she had a boyfriend. Their relationship was a friendship that evolved into a romance. In interviews he’s called her his “rock,” and credited her with keeping him grounded. Once the romance died the solid foundation remained, despite their ups and downs throughout the years. As far as I know the divorce, which began in April 2009, has not yet been finalized, yet they’ve kept things civil and respectful and are back where they started…friends.

    Contrast this with Oksana. She started out as Mel’s mistress, someone to provide the sex and companionship he wasn’t getting from Robyn when their marriage soured. Before she got pregnant and Robyn filed for divorce he did not want the public to know about the true nature of their relationship, saying it was purely professional and she was signed to his record label (which exists only on paper; Oksana was its sole “artist”.) They were “in lust” for a while and bi-polar Mel was on a “high.” Then the pregnancy gave them a reality check forced them into a more committed relationship, one which, IMO, Mel never really wanted (in fact, I don’t believe he ever planned on divorcing Robyn). They spent more time together and Mel’s mood started spiraling downward. There were tabloid reports last fall that said “the lightbulb” finally came on and he saw the real Oksana. Another report said he’d had a hard time during the holidays because it was his first Christmas without Robyn. His birthday is January 4th, and the mega argument supposedly happened two days later, so I wonder if that was a factor. “A family friend” has told PEOPLE that Mel had been seeing a therapist to help him get out of the relationship with Oksana, and two weeks ago the magazine said that theirs was a toxic match, that Mel likes his space and Oksana was very demanding and controling.

    I AM NOT BLAMING THE VICTIM, but Mel clearly has mental issues and perhaps Oksana unintentionally “pushed his buttons” because she didn’t know how to handle the situation. Robyn did, and he knows it, which is why I doubt he ever physically abused her. In Mel’s mind Robyn is the Madonna, Oksana and all his other women are whores.

  81. becca says:

    Oh dear lord….

    1) Whoopi, you and I are done. Hon, you just lost a fan. I hope you lose more you idiot.

    2) There is PLENTY of evidence of Gibson’s a**holishness ways. Like the right wing sect of catholicism that he belongs to, his dad’s anti-semitic rants, and his own DUI rant.

    You know what they say, a drunk mind speaks a sober heart.

    Gibson is a anti-semitic racist sexist pr**k, pure and simple. And you know what? Golddiggers don’t deserve to be called pigs in heat. Golddiggers don’t deserve to be told they’d be attacked by a bunch of (insert the n word here). They deserve to be arrested for extortion.

    But the problem here, is that this golddigger has been verbally, and physically abused. And THAT COMES FIRST. Not only that, but Gibson is endangering a little baby girl with his attitude towards Oksana. He’s been off the rails for years. Forget his previous marriage with his older kids, he’s a disgusting piece of trash.

    And you know what? It is possible that Oksana has no brains for getting with Mel Gibson. But that DOESN’T excuse the way he’s been treating her.

    But here’s another thought. What if she didn’t know about his a**holishness ways? She came out of nowhere from Russia. No one knows her background. She might not have the access to the media like we all do here. She might just know the name and some of the major movies he’s done. I mean – ‘Mel Gibson.’ That’s a name that’s nearly, if not as famous as Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. We don’t know her background. She may have no known about Mel’s dark past at all, given the fact that she has literally come out of the middle of nowhere as far as the media is concerned.

    And if there was signs at the beginning that Oksana decided to ignore? I blame the media and the sick society we live in that have espoused the idea of a woman being able to change a bad boy, being able to fix him and mend his evil ways.

    You can’t change a bad boy. They change themselves.

    The way people are blaming Oksana makes me sick. Domestic abuse is abuse, pure and simple. It’s wrong all around, and there are no excuses whatsoever

  82. KateNonymous says:

    There are ways in which I question her motives. But so what? He said the things he said, regardless of her motives.

    Being “entrapped” doesn’t mean you didn’t do it.

  83. Uzi says:

    @Jennifer…I’ve got your back girl! You’ve made some very valid comments. Don’t let the Team Oksana lynch mob get you down!

    And God bless Whoopie for being Mel’s friend at a time when he really needs one! He has clearly hit rock bottom.

    Oksana…You’ve made your point. We get it. ENOUGH! A lot of people are getting tired of your incessant tape leaks and “impromptu” photo ops and interviews outside your…oops, I mean Mel’s that he lets you live in rent free…multi million dollar home. This is the father of your child! Please let the legal system and mental health professionals deal with this horrible situation!

  84. Annabelle says:

    whoopi goldberg is a disgrace. Look at her attacking a fellow woman and insinuating that oksana has something to gain from being abused by her boyfriend. I was put off when whoopi defended roman polanski but I thought it was just a one-off and whoopi was confused. Nuh-uh! Whoopi is starting to show a pattern of disrespect towards abuse victims. Perhaps she has her own little secret no?

  85. LOVE ANGELINA says:

    GC Oksana did not ask to be hit in the face or treated like sh*t. When he hit her in the face she left. She says it on the tapes. He didn’t want her to leave, but she said Mel I have to protect daughters life. When he hit her she was through. Its not easy at all to deal with being an abusive relationship. Let just make this clean and easy, blaming Oksana for this sh*t is not right. I had never heard of her before this, there is no evidence of her being involved in situations like. Like Mel, she was married several years before getting a divorce and then she met Mel. Mel did this to himself. He harmed a woman who had his child. He is an asshole. He is the abuser and thats that. I am floored that you or anyway has the gull to not say this woman is a victim. She is the victim. She didn’t hit Mel. He hit her. Mel is the crazy person.

    I mean if you wanna question her status as a victim then your questioning every single woman involved in a abusive relationship. Why don’t you and all the other people wondering how Mel, who was already showing signs of being a nutcase, but not to this extent, go read up on men who abuse women and find out for yourselves why he is suddenly like this. However don’t give that crazy response like Oksana is equally responsible for Mel being a crazy bastard. He was that way before she got involved, but he hid it. I applaud her for getting out and for having evidence.

    To think if she hadn’t done this she may be forced to have joint custody of her daughter with this freak. In situations like this its usually his word VS hers and because this woman was smart she can prove how dangerous he is. Good for her. Good for VICTIMS fighting back.

  86. nnn says:

    I don’t wish Oksana’s ordeal tro anyone but i will be first in line if ever one of Whoopi’s daughters went thtough the same with or without goldgging or homewrecking from their part.

    I will be the first in line to see Whoopi questionning her daughter’s motivations and not the ones who abused her.

    I bet she will be the first in line to applaud her daughter for having recorded the abuses on tape and i am sure she, whoppi will the first to release it to the press and ask to bust that asshole or she’ll get after him.

  87. NoWay says:

    I kind of get a part of Whoopi’s point. If a man beats you go to the police. Do everything in your power to put them in jail – not go to the taboids. They live in LA after OJ the police are very sensitive to celebrities and beatings – not the same as the average joe. Oksana holds some of the blame in this fiasco of a relationship. Still she does not deserve to be beaten and yelled at like that. Her conduct was a bad moral decision – his is criminal. The two don’t compare at all. You have to wonder if Mel has a mental disease or something and that is why Whoopi may think she knows him differently. Still no excuse though.

  88. Steve22 says:

    @ Uzi:

    So “Letting” the mother of your child live rent free makes it absolutely A OK for him to beat the hell out of her? Wow, now I have heard it all. Stunning! Yep, he is worth so much money and big and powerful so he can do anything he dam well pleases and ANYTHING she does is ONLY because she is after money and has no soul. Listen to yourself. You sound just like Mel on that tape.

  89. nnn says:

    #84

    No she just has a ego problem. Oksana and that raped teen from Planski are nobodies for her, so they are always suspected of bringing down her colleagues while their suffering and abuses are details.

    Whoopi has an ego problem and think highly of people of her industry while us, people from the street have defacto no credibility.

    She didn’t say anything about Rihanna because Rihanna is a celebrity. She wouldn’t said anything and may have sided Oksana if this was a fellow celebrity.

    I bet Whoopi would have never questioned Tina Turner’s motivations when she was hit by Ike.

    It’s disgusting the double standard that automatically discredit people who are not famous versus the star who abuse them !

    Hell, i am sure that if Mel was as nobody as Oksana is, 3/4 of those who support him wouldn’t.

  90. GrnMtGirl says:

    The Man’s got serious rage issues…

  91. mln says:

    Whoopi has a history of self hating remember when she told Ted Danson it would be hilarious if he dressed up in Blackface? I don’t think she gets that there are people who are racists but like certain Black people but the ones that the don’t like they think of as the N word after listening to the tapes in their entirety I don’t know how anyone can defend him. I actually have alot of Oksana for standing up to him.

  92. constance says:

    I’m not pro either of these two. I’ve said some foul shit in the heat of arguments with my baby-daddy and he’s said some really scummy shit too. I’m not going to lie. I don’t really care what was being said because anger, frustration, and exhaustion do terrible things to the brain-to-mouth filter.

    I find her tone scary in itself. She knew she was taping so I guess that comes with knowing your playing for an audience.

    He sounds like a drunk or a mental case off his meds. He’s stupid for falling into the trap of illegal telephone recordings.

    I wish that little baby the best. I can’t remember hearing anything bad about Mel’s older children, so I would imagine Robyn is a great mother. Something Mel obvious went looking for but didn’t find the second time around.

    If he did break her face, she’ll be paid well and he should have known better. Verbal abuse is a horrid thing I’ve lived with all my life with my bipolar father. I hope he gets help, because his children don’t deserve to live with the ranting.

  93. Kim says:

    F… Whoopi – she is such an uneducated piece of trash with zero talent. Who in the world watches the View now that she is on it? no one I know. everyone i know stopped when she joined the cast. Shes an idiot who probably wants attention because she knows her comments will have women screaming at her.

    Bottom line who cares if she went to the media, shouted it from mountain, leaked the tapes herself – WHO CARES. Mel is a violent, alcoholic who should be jailed for hitting her period. Who cares what her motives are. It doesnt change what he did/said! He is scum and needs to pay for abusing her.

  94. Praise St. Angie! says:

    “Wonder if Mel really knocked her teeth out or if she rammed her face into something . . .so she could say he did it.”

    Good Christ. are you for real?

  95. Tia C says:

    @ Taylor B (31): Yeah, I didn’t really mean that in a political way, although I realize it did sound like that. I really meant more personally liberal, not politically. This is definitely not a political issue. All I was really trying to say (not very eloquently) was that Whoopi has been way out lately on some of her opinions. And I really like Whoopi, but to say that Roman Polanski didn’t “rape rape” that 13 year old girl, and to say that Mel Gibson is not a racist, when he obviously is filled with hate, is kinda far out. That’s all.

  96. Kim says:

    I dont know why everyone is so upset at Whoopi. She has always been unintelligent & classlesss.

    I would expect nothing else from her idiotic mouth.

  97. Ruffian9 says:

    Praise St. Angie, jane16, OC lady, Steve22. Thanks for your posts. They balance (& some how make up for) the ‘apologists’ who somehow think that in abhoring, without reservation, Mel’s actions, we believe Oksana is a saint. That’s asinine. No one believes that. This about his actions, which she is NOT responsible for.

    Oh, and Whoopi, you disgust me. Polanski and Gibson? Who else do you have on your apologist list?

  98. Shy says:

    Oh Whoopi… Hess sad it right – he probably smiled at her face and then laugh and badmouth behind her back. He is typical abuser. They mentally torture their wifes behind closed doors. And none of their friand ever suspect something. And then don’t believe the victim.

    Thats why Oksana did it. Like she sad on tape: “No one ever sad a bad word about me before”. And the moment after they split everyone was bashing her and NO ONE believed her. Even when she filed restraining order everyone were laughing. And if she wouldn’t record the tapes no one would ever believe her. She could scream so loud but everyone would just laugh and say “golddigger”. That’s why she released them. To show everyone what she had to experience.

    And as for Mel’s poor wife…. She is of those forever-victims. He probably did this all to her for years. But as many other woman she lived with it. And only after Mel found another victim and left her – Robyn was free. Oksana was not the victim and made the most fascinating revenge to abuser ever. She shoved the world what monster Mel is. And it’s a perfect example to other victims. If he abuses you and your friends don’t believe you – buy a camera and record him. Even video. And then sent it to all his friends, family and to his work. And if he hits you, if you caught it on camera – he will go to jail.

    P.S. Oh, and his people statement… Amazing. So he will now go to Rehab for Abusers or something? When will they finally open Rehab for Murderers? I mean some celebrity will murder his wife, then go to TV and cry about his hard childhood, then going to Rehab and everything is OK.

  99. GatsbyGal says:

    I shouldn’t matter why she’s bringing all of this to light. Mel Gibson is an abuser and not even fit to be called a human being, and it’s ALL on tape. I can’t believe anyone would ne angry towards Oksana for getting this information out there. Yes, she’s probably a golddigger, but does that mean she deserves to be abused and silently put up with it? Jesus Christ, it’s not like this is a he said/she said situation, the evidence is RIGHT THERE for you to listen to.

  100. mai tai says:

    Mel is an abuser/criminal and Whoopi is out of her mind.
    There’s no question about what Mel did. In Whoopi terminology, this is ‘abuse abuse’ and ‘assault assualt’. He knocked her teeth out. There is no ulterior motive on the part of the victim that Whoopi is trying to blame.
    Earth to Whoopi: what Mel did is ‘crime crime’. Yes, that means it’s a 100% real actual crime and he should be held accountable for it.

  101. DB says:

    I agree with Whoopi, and think it is pretty brave to speak out and defend him, given the shock value of the tapes.

    I think there is a huge difference between drunken abusive rants, and a persons true nature when sober.

  102. Maritza says:

    The best thing Oksana did was tape him because now Mel can hear how scary and hateful he sounds. It’s a reality check for himself, I’m sure he doesn’t even remember half of the things he says. No woman in their right mind will want to get near him now.

  103. Shay says:

    Now, after the other tapes have been released, I’m beginning to think that she taped them to have proof of his vicious side.
    Many women take out restraining orders to be killed by their former partners. Where I live in Australia, there have been plenty of women in abusive relationships, who have broken free, to move on with their lives, for their partners to turn up at courts with shotguns when these women seek custody.
    Oksana has probably had the tapes released to the tabloids to further publicize her situation probably as extra protection or as a deterrent for Mel who has clearly threatened that he could turn up at anytime and be (financially capable for hiring someone or doing it himself?) capable of killing her.
    It’s sick.
    To say that he is in ‘pain’ is bullshit, to say that he needs help is even more futile. This man has had so many opportunities in his life. He is practically a billionaire who can pay people to provide him with sex, should he not want a relationship, but he chooses the latter so he can clearly verbally abuse women. He is beyond help. His career is over, and he brought it all upon himself.
    He has become the most publically repugnant celebrity. There is no one else with so many public gaffs as him. His deranged personality overshadows Roman Polanski’s perversity.
    As for The View? With the exception of Joy, the remaining panel on this show barely share a brain.

  104. Anti-icon says:

    Shy #98: Your logic is really warped. I hope you are not sharing this idea that enduring abuse long enough to show proof is the way to negotiate life and love. Trust is the key, and it takes time to build; but no time at all to break. If a man breaks a woman’s trust, the relationship should end. BEFORE abuse occurs. I guess that’s why this particular celebrity’s behavior, and that of his wife, is being so closely scrutinized. What happens inside relationships should NEVER require a camera, or a call to 911.

  105. LindaR says:

    Ruffian9 – exactly. Few people would doubt that Oksana saw an opportunity with the rich and famous Mel Gibson and took it. However, any man that would a) hit a woman and b)hit her while holding their child, is really not much of a man at all. More likely a coward and a bully. I’d like to see him pick on someone his own size and see what happens. Somehow I doubt he would. These types never do.

  106. Sdee76 says:

    There is no excuse for ANYONE speaking to someone the way he spoke to her. I was scared for her listening to the tapes, and don’t blamer one bit for taping and releasing them.

  107. nottellingyou says:

    When I heard the recordings of Mel Gibson I thought I was hearing my father (may he rest in peace). My father was a charming, handsome man whom everybody (especially women) loved. But when the doors were closed at home, he would turn into Mr. Hyde and rant and be this really sick bastard, just like Mel on the tapes. I never told anybody because I knew they’d never believe me – my mother never told her friends, either, because they all thought my parents were such a glamorous couple. I know why Oksana recorded those conversations!

  108. audrey says:

    There is a lot of valuable insight on this thread…I am really heartened by the commenters who have stated that NO ONE deserves ANY abuse, no matter what. But many commenters have stated this much more eloquently than I ever could, so I will move on to my small point about Oksana sounding scripted:
    I don’t believe English is her first language. I am fluent in French (but didn’t learn until I was a teen), but I still think in English. When I talk about more complicated issues in French (especially emotional stuff), I sometimes revert back to very, very formal (school-taught) French. If I added “I know I am taping myself” to this terribly stressful situation, I am sure I would sound like a weirdo. So just because she sounds awkward or wooden when speaking doesn’t mean she isn’t speaking from the heart. Just my two cents on a minor point in this whole sad situation.

  109. Whatever says:

    I tried to give Mel the benefit of the doubt, but he is a lost soul. However, that does not mean I believe for one second that she is doing any of this out of fear. Bullshit. If she were afraid, she would have gone to the police, not Radar. Also, she has been letting him take the baby since January all the way up until father’s day weekend. She isn’t scared, she is getting back at him. And maybe he deserves it, but that still doesn’t make her innocent and I question her motives too. Questioning her motives isn’t the same as saying she deserved it. No one does, even the queen of all gold diggers. They are both sick and that baby should be removed from both of them. Dalton should take his son to England for a while to get away from his mom’s drama.

  110. Debbie says:

    OK Oksana has another house David Forster bought for her in LA, IF. she was so terrified of Mel and for Her daughter WHY did she not go there.

    Secondly this happened on 6th Jan, Why did she say and travel to Europe with Mel and Spain to promote his Movie?
    Why was she speaking of him so highly in Russia thanking him for starting her career AND WHY DID SHE SIT DOWN WITH LAWYERS AGREE ON A JOINT CUSTODY 50/50 WITH MEL AND AMAZINGLY FORGET TO TELL THE JUDGE WHEN SHE TOOK OUT A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST MEL LAST MONTH OF THIS AGREEMENT, AND IF SHE WAS SO PETRIFIED WHY DID SHE NOT GO THE THE POLICE WHEN THIS HAPPENED, GET A RESTRAINING ORDER THEN, WHY WAIT FOR SEVERAL MONTHS.

    And before any one of you have a go at me I have lived with a bio-polar person and at first hand have experienced absolutely disgusting comments and behavior. We were threatened with all kinds of manic stuff But they were only words, they did hurt at the time But as a family we did pull through. We got help.The judge ordered these tapes sealed for a reason! Not for them to be leaked to the world, They I’m sure would have been listened to and the matter in hand dealt with p[privately.
    She says she did go to a dentist, BUT The dentist has broken the LAW He did not full out a complaint/incident for and pass it on to the police.

    He had to do this with in 24 hours. He did not follow California law. procedures
    I am against domestic abuse BUT I still believe she provoked him more than we know, She sounds far to clam on these tapes It sounds really odd to say what she said about Punching her twice in the face and breaking 2 teeth with the baby in her hands,

    that to me just does not sound right, .and keep in mind her story’s have changed
    It is obvious to anyone Mel is bio-polar and needs help I have listened to all the tapes and am disgusted But He sounds to me in some cases he’s venting anger at himself and her.
    He needs help not to be treated like a criminal. Just look at Polanski Raping an under aged Girl on the run for over 30 years to not pay for his crime.
    The only thing Mel is guilty of at the moment is shooting his mouth off.

    If she truly was in danger as she now claims, she had her house to go to in LA, She had plenty of friends she had the police. And there is NO WAY she would sit there over a 6 month period and agree on a 50/50/ custody settlement with Mel.
    He truly needs help, and as for leaking the tapes it was her, She can deny it all she wants

    Debbie

  111. NaughyChimp says:

    Mel is a sick freak. But Oksana is clearly a piece of work, too. I hope they both disappear… soon!

  112. Paula says:

    Steve22 wrote:

    “She had NO legal authority to take the child away from Mel.”

    Florida recognizes joint physical and legal custody of both unmarried parents, who are advised to file a custody plan with the state upon the birth of their child. Mel and Oksana have equal rights to physical custody of the child.

    The bastard busted her face! What about that do you not get? Why some of you go after the abused and not that raving maniac is absolutely stunning! It’s really very sad! “

    That Mel is a crazy, racist, violent creep is a given for just about everyone except Whoopie Goldberg. Nothing more to discuss. What is disputed on Mel-Oksana threads is whether Oksana has chosen to use Mel’s violence and threats as a means to obtain a large settlment, rather than seeking criminal redress. Recall that Oksana did not report the domestic violence incident to the police right away. Had she done so, she could have obtained a restraining order and probably gotten temporary physical custody. No one but Oksana knows her motives.

    Is Oksana a victim of domestic violence? By Mel’s admission, YES. Is she some poor little hapless victim deserving of heaps of sympathy, well, that’s where commenters disagree. She’s a victim, but she’s not hapless. She has demonstrated that she is very capable of advancing her own interests. Nothing wrong with that at all. I have no problem with golddiggers who outsmart violent, racist drunks, but I can’t quite join Team Oksana because getting involved with a creep, and a married one with 7 kids at that, is not a choice I would make.

  113. theresa says:

    Oksana did have a restraining order. However, many dead women had restraining orders that provided little or no protection. In fact, the leading cause of death of pregnant women in the U.S. is murder by their baby’s father.

    I don’t care who leaked these tapes. At least the light of publicity has been shown into the dark corners of their relationship. Now his threats of murder, “I’ll put you under a rose garden”, “hit you in the head with a bat”, etc. will be kept in check by his handlers. Good for her for protecting her life from a maniac.

    Gibson has always been a dangerous, drunken, abusive head case. I believe that he got his first DUI in 1984 in Philadelphia. He was a cash cow, so he always got a pass.

    BTW, why does a 50+ y.o. man with 7 children really need another one? Who victimized him by pulling the condom off his Viagra inflated penis? If he wanted to be sure not to impregnate a woman again, why didn’t he get a vasectomy? Did his bizzare Church of Mel still stay with the mainstream Catholic edict that sex is for procreation, not pleasure?

    I remember Whoopi from the old days in the San Francisco Bay area before she was famous. She was funny, direct and earthy. I believe that her great enduring love affair is with Hollywood. After she found fame, money and acceptance there, she became a very different person. Her behavior now, as the self-appointed “Wise Woman” on The View makes me think that she is re-enacting her role as Guinan from Star Trek Next Generation. I don’t believe that she is really in touch with reality very often anymore.

  114. deborah says:

    Whoopi is a complete woman-hating freakshow. She was all upset when the “media” was being so hard on poor Tiger Woods,too. She is always coming to the defense of egotistical douchebags. It’s because she’s one too. Cant. Stand. Her.

  115. Dorothy says:

    @ Jennifer you are clearly a dude no self respecting woman uses the word c$nt. Aor maybe a bitter woman who has had her husband stoledn.mpathetic either way
    P

  116. nnn says:

    Again Whoopi doesn’t care about ‘normal’ everyday people.

    Wherever something’s happen that shed a darker light on one of her collegue’s, she jumps on it as the protector of the criminals…whatever the crime he did.

    She will blame the victim for exposing that darker side while absolving the abuser/criminal for doing the crime, hence being responsible of his own demise.

    She just has a superiority complex :

    celebrity = untouchable and sinless ALWAYS
    victim = guilty of exposing the vulnerability of the abuser making him ‘normal’, fallible and sinful.

    She is mad about Oksana because she stripped Mel from his ‘star’ superiority stamp ignoring the fact that he did it to himself by dehumanizing another humanbeing in every possible way : mentally, physically, spitiyually, you name it. he did it all, erasing, negating, trashing every aspect of her person…including the most intimate part of her existence : her genes through their child (hoping that the child won’t take after her….despicable).

  117. emv says:

    I’m still not buying what she is selling. This whole story still seems fishy to me. I mean if you listen to the tapes the voices sound…not right, like spliced together or warped. He needs to be in jail for crimes he actually committed not crimes that he may have committed, but then again celebrities always get off with a slap on the wrist, most of the time.

  118. uh huh says:

    Whoopi is an idiot. I’ve long since lost all respect for her. Mel is a disgusting human being and although I still believe Oksana was/is a gold digger, she did not deserve to be abused. Also, Mel has long been unfaithful to his wife. I have a very good friend (former model) who went out on a few dates with him in the early 90s (yes, she was morally bankrupt in her youth too). He just got lazy in his old age. He was NEVER a real family man. All for show.

  119. AussieGal says:

    As to the issue of whether any woman deserves to be beaten black and blue. Let me tell you a story :
    A friend of mine, of a strong and independent character, was going out with a Jekyl and Hyde type personality. The minute he hit her, she went to the cops to report assault and he ended up with the proverbial “slap on the wrist”. The bloke then took up with an overseas “student”. Naturally she warned the new girl of this man’s character and showed her evidence that was tendered to the court. Did this new girl listen ? No, she would rather put up with this abusive man in order to get her residential visa (through marriage naturally). So did this “student” deserve the abuse ? I would not hazard an unequivocal No

  120. CB Rawks says:

    Damn well written, Celebitchy.

  121. Understanding says:

    I do not have to imagine why she made the recordings because I have been there. Iived with a verbally and physically abusive man for 10 years. There are many reasons for that but ultimately it was my self esteem and financial dependence. It can be very difficult to get out of the relationship or even get the police to take you seriously if the man is well liked. When you have a child with someone you are tied to them for life especially if you share custody.

    In my case no one believed or took me seriously. I ended up taping my conversations as proof. In retrospect they sounded scripted and I remained calm. My goal was to show how completely unhinged he was and that he was dangerous. I gave copies to friends, family and the police during our custody battle. Was I supposed to? NO. But I did it anyway. I am free of this man and have sole custody of my child. We are safe and that is all that matters.

    Question her motives all you want. If it is true she is doing the right thing.

  122. Shy says:

    @Anti-icon – but did you read all the comments? How many women say that they are in abusive relationships? And they can’t get out? Read what @Understandin sad. That’s exactly what you should do if he is abusing you and no one believes you and you can’t get out. RECORD him. Even better to record the video. If he is beating you – then he will go straight to jail. Oksana send a perfect public example to all women who are afraid to leave.

  123. DrM says:

    Understanding@thank you for that. I think that what Oksana did by taping those conversations was the only thing she could have done in the circumstances. If she’d come out and said what he had done without ‘proof’ many of your posting here would have called her a ‘liar’. Many of you did initially.

    Whatever it takes to keep her and that baby safe I say…and Whoopi needs to be removed from the View immediately. She’s a HUGE liability.

  124. GatsbyGal says:

    Oh, and @Uzi, your opinions are always wrong.

  125. Madison says:

    Jennifer you make a lot of good points. I don’t think this story is as black and white as Team Oksana and the media have convinced the public it is. I’m still on Team No One and think all the players in this sordid disgusting mess need to take responsibility for their actions. Oksana’s actions since her split from Mel show what a classy lady Robyn Gibson really is and how lucky he was to be married to her. I feel for Mel’s kids more than anyone, he’s still their father and it must be hard to watch him being publicly humiliated like this.

  126. Ogechi says:

    @Jennifer: Am so happy and excited reading your comments. At least somebody ‘I’ consider reasonable has written what I found so educating, morally sound and straight to the point. I am glad that people like you comment here. Not joining the bandwagon makes u my friend-I love u so so so much. Kudos!

    It is not the matter of mentioning abuse abuse abuse- why are u abused? how do u place yourself as a woman with good moral and family background? No further comments!!!

  127. nnn says:

    Yeah tell that to the baby who was abused in the process.

    You self rigtheous so called christians think that you are sinless and that your faith will protect your from ever meeting a loser.

    How many innocent women have been raped, punched by losers who were their man, husband, lover or even father ?

    How many innocent CHILDREN have to endure the same ? Should they also asked why they got into that situation ? Should they also feel guilty and that it’s somewhat their fault ?

    And what about Mel’s own daughter he put in danger. Shall she also wonder herself why she got into that situation ?

    Why not blaming the one who abuses, who is the elder, the stronger one, the one who is accountable for his wondeeds and sins, the one who should know better than anyone. Why absolve the abuser of his own sin and blame it on the victim ?

    Why not blame the ex wife too then who probably knew this all along, live with it for 28 years. Was she a loser too to live that long with an abuser who already had mistresses and often disrespect her publicly !

  128. Jazz says:

    Real men don’t hit women. Ever.

  129. ohcamille! says:

    First time poster on this site.

    Celebitchy: well written and I agree with your comments. You have a fan in me.

    I choose to express my opinion with my wallet. We are the “nobody special” people that make actors/actresses rich and famous everytime we pay for a movie ticket or watch a tv show.
    I thought MGs’ career was over after the DUI rant was exposed. People ($80 million worth) still went to see his last movie. He spent his own money to make that movie which was considered a flop; a flop that made him $80 million. Frankly, he lost this fan with Maverick. That movie was unwatchable and I am glad I only laid out $1.99 to rent it. I am still a fan of Jodie Foster and I am very curious as to how she will handle this situation. I will vote for/against her when her position on this issue is made public.
    I hope MG spends all of his own money to make more movies (that noone will go see), because making movies employs thousands of people we never see/hear/talk about, but who still need jobs. So there’s that.

    Whoopie: I haven’t been a fan since “Blackface”! I have seen you on The View a couple of times and I am embarrassed for you. You are awkward and you go for the obvious ratings boost. Yawn!

    Oksana: I can’t relate to her because I’ve never been the other woman, given birth, or had my teeth knocked out. She could be anybody/nobody.

    I am glad these gossip sites exist because I like expressing my opinion in detail. I believe that “HWood” reads these comments as much as we “nobodies” do….much more statisfying than being a nobody that didn’t buy a movie ticket.

    Thanks Celebitchy!

  130. denise says:

    Whoopi is ugly inside and out. Her eyebrows quit her ass long ago.

  131. PixTweak says:

    No one deserves to be talked that way. What kind of person would have a relationship with a rich person and have a child with someone who she clearly does not love only because of how it will benefit her? What kind of person messes with someone’s emotions like that. Use a child as a bargaining tool as collateral? What kind of asshole would react this way after finding out everything was a lie? Why is it ok to trick people and use them but not ok to confront them and tell them exactly how you feel? This is none of our business, period. People say fucked up shit when they feel they’ve been betrayed. He’s clearly at a crossroads in his life and she knows and opportunity.

  132. Jennifer says:

    “Wonder if Mel really knocked her teeth out or if she rammed her face into something . . .so she could say he did it.”

    –“Good Christ. are you for real?”

    Sorry to say, that’s a legit question. One of my best friends was in an abusive relationship with his girlfriend. She was a hellish little tormentor. When he FINALLY got the nuts to leave her, she trashed nearly everything he owned and then proceeded to *cut her own face and arms and throw herself into the walls* so that if he dared call the cops about his $25k worth of demolished video equipment, he would be hauled off to jail for beating the snot out of her. Yeah, it happens. It ain’t just men that are crazy.

    And I don’t know why I continue to say this, since no one gets it, it is absolutely NOT ok to abuse someone. Anyone convicted of abuse should face whatever criminal charges apply. But I will not feel SYMPATHY for someone who stays with an abuser. Regardless of ANY of the *opinions* written and shared here, not a single one of us is anywhere near the two primary people involved, so we are all just throwing conjecture, *opinions* and feelings. No need to tell anyone to eat d**k or get personally nasty. Which I find hella ironic actually – everyone supporting the abused is turning around and being abusive to another poster.

  133. becca says:

    @Jennifer:

    “But I will not feel SYMPATHY for someone who stays with an abuser.”

    Those are your quotes. Hon, you REEK of ignorance, double standards, and I quite honestly pity you. Mental abuse is way more damaging than physical abuse because it corners the abused in. They feel TRAPPED. They FEEL they have NO way to get out. Someone among this mass of people said that an average victim tries to leave their abuser seven times before succeeding. SEVEN TIMES.

  134. Wif says:

    “But I will not feel SYMPATHY for someone who stays with an abuser.”

    Wow. Really? What about in cases of the non-wealthy, where women can have absolutely no power and are often chased by their abuser? Surely this isn’t a blanket statement you’re making here.

  135. cat5 says:

    If you want to know why women don’t leave their abusers, why women get in these situations and can’t get out, why women don’t just go to the cops, why men have such control over women; look no further than the comments here and other sites on this story. You have all the abuse apologists and their female hatred that is so prevalent in our society clearly and proudly waving their flags for all to see. Especially from other women.

    How anyone in their right mind can listen to these tapes and come off sympathetic to the abuser says it all really. Comments like, “I feel NO SYMPATHY for someone who is abused who ‘should know better'” sums it up. All the moral posturing and bootstraps rhetoric is what makes this kind of abuse so common and widespread. You can only be abused and be believed if you’re a perfect angelic virgin worthy of good Christian pity, with no flaws or hint of being anything other than a perfect woman to be worthy of belief; if you’re lucky even, maybe not even then. Otherwise, you’re a gold-digging whore who is just trying to destroy the poor man who can’t help himself. You’re a liar or an idiot who ‘should have known better’. If the cops don’t protect you or take you seriously (which they rarely do) then they MUST have good reason. Going to the police rarely improves a victim’s situation nor change abuse or make it go away, hate to break the misinformed white knight fantasy so many have of the police.

    Then when a woman does leave like here, and records her abuse for all to see, then she ‘should have left sooner’ or it must be fake because she’s not yelling back or she’s fabricating it for sympathy or she slept with him when he was married, so she’s obviously a scheming witch. No matter what a woman does, it’s always her fault for being abused. It’s because people think this way and continue to think this way that these things happen. Because self-hatred, egos and blind isolated views that allow these despicable situations to flourish. It encourages silence and helplessness upon victims. It places no responsibility on the abuser, or only conditional responsibility. And then people that think this way have the ignorant gall to ask things like, “Why didn’t she _______?!” Makes me sick. Whoopi is an embarrassment and disgrace to women everywhere. The Polanski thing was bad enough, but this is just crossing the line twice.

  136. Mary D says:

    Tonight I sat and listened to the Mel Gibson tapes in sequence one after the other trying to make sense of it all. I had already listened to bits, opinions and laughed at the craziness of Mel Gibson’s comments. When I finished listening I noticed I felt sick emotionally. Then I googled and went on U tube to get more information. I found Mel’s interview with a jewish news caster
    (Rubin) that ended in Mel calling him an asshole. Another interview Mel demonstrated anger toward the interviewer when he asked Mel if he thought Hollywood Industry had forgiven him for his behavior. I read when Mel was arrested he called a woman police officer ; I think sugar tit or something digusting like that. As I continued to locate information about Mel GibsonI realized his abusive behavior is nothing new. He has a long history of abusing people constant theme race and sex. There were reported statements from friends of Robin / Mel Gibson’s former wife saying they were so glad to see Robyn had gotten herself out of an abusive marriage, wondering why Robin had stayed so long? As I thought more and more about all I had read; still feeling sick from the tapes; I did not of Oksana of a victom or feel sorry for her ; what I felt was admiration for her for her all her courage. Apparently it has taken a woman to come all the way from Russia to publicly stand up to Mel Gibson for all the abuse he has subjected onto her and many others. Others who nay have been unwilling to stand up to him him because of his money. I also feel fear for Oksana because clearly she and her children are in danger. If Mel Gibson is allowed to continue in his rage; there is strong possible tradgedy.
    I am so grateful for this article that puts the events clearly into perspective . I hope Whoopie will read it along with many others who have shown support to such an abusive man.

    Thank you for this article.

  137. K.sommer says:

    I didnt hear gibson agreeing that he hit her ,he said she deserved it.I dont believe a word from oksana.Its a shake down. Mel stated she shook the child after she threw herself down outside. the woman asked for money,lakers tickets,after she knew he had sold his lakers box. to spitefully set him off.the gravytrain had ended,she still squats in his multimillion $ home.the tapes are doktored,she tried to blackmail him for MORE then 15 mil. I would be pissed to. He feels totaly betrayed,and duped. She went to the press to announce they’re relationship.that placed the nail in his coffin with his wife.she is holding her daughter as a pawn after she found out what his wife is suposed to get in the divorce settlement,she thinks she knows what she can extort out of him. now she is famous,thats another few million,she announced that she had more juicy details to come.(more blackmail)what did her sister get paid for those tapes.stays in the family ,baby! I hope mel has enough money to sue the pants off her, I hope also his wife forgives him and they repair the relationship for the sake of the family.That would be wonderful for mel and the beginning of him finding peace again.We all remember the joy he had with his kids,and how much his family meant to him.the downward spiral with the alcohol is very painful to watch, but I think he will be alright in the end. a bitter lesson.I hope he gets good medical help.Only people with limited experience will be judgemental and jump to conclusions.the question is: how many people will stand next to a person that shakes a infant ,your baby,and will not stop? If the child would as a result have braindamage & then lie and say it was mel that caused it? look at the pictures what she looks like after the birth of her son sasha with dalton,and now how she looks.(not taking into account the bad cosmetic surgery she has paid for,or whoever paid for it) why is there no record of her marriage to dalton?was she married 3 times before dalton?1 russion and 2 english fellows?19 the first time then a english for visa and the third a photografer that got her into modeling. into a translating job where she met dalton.97 she split with dalton,that was the year mel separated with his wife,after just a couple of month trying to control his alcoholdependence. Thats when the proverbial snake slithered into mels life.she traded up.dont know what settlement she got for putting the horns on dalton,but she was working as a hostess in a russian restaurant when she hooked mel.oh,well…we all are fools sometimes.

  138. K.sommer says:

    it has all the classic symptoms of a full blownout midlife crisis. It’s like watching a trainwreck,some call it a nervous brakedown.people forget- we are human,and some people lose they’re life in the process,then it’s :he was so great,why wasnt he helped.or it’s: she drove him over the edge,and the finger pointing will start all over again.Now all those children will not have a father.But the savagery demands blood for the gossipmongering.who cares for the families!we want to see gore.