Do you know how terrible an actor Justin Timberlake is? He’s so bad he can’t even recognize good acting. JT appointed himself as director of the commercials for his tequila brand, 901 Silver Tequila. It’s supposed to be premium stuff (according to Copyranter), and very, very expensive. So of course JT wanted to direct the glossy, sexy ads himself. Except that he’s unoriginal. Except that he hired an “actress” based (probably) on how good her blow job was.
Worst line reading ever? Perhaps. I mean… what director thinks that is a good performance? Oh, and he directed a second spot too:
Ooh, sadomasochism! JT is so DARING! It’s all so sexy and I just want to drink his expensive tequila now!!!
Seriously, though: how is JT casting these horrible actresses, and why doesn’t he know that they’re giving terrible performances? Oh, right. His girlfriend is Jessica Biel. He’s gotten so inured to God-awful acting, he can’t even see it anymore.
the hell *major eye roll*
Yeah, but the boy can DANCE and sing and look HAWT.
Well, DUH…look who he’s dating.
Ooooh…I was hoping you were exaggerating about the bad directing and acting. Sorry to say, you were right. Bad, bad, bad.
Wow, those WERE terrible! That article was not exaggerating in the least. The first one almost felt like it got cut off before she could finish talking. So awkward!
Did he write that god awful dialouge too? It’s hard to imagine a professional getting paid to write something so incoherent.
He may be all of those things, but he is successful nonetheless.
Oooh – that IS bad!
Please add “awful actor himself” to the list. Thank you.
He is only successful with music. His Acting career is such a joke. Stick with what your good at JT!
I love Justin, by my god, that was 901 kinds of wrong!
I think JT is an incredibly talented actor. Did any one see Alpha Dog or Black Snake Moan? He was amazing in both films.
@Gabs- Well I think having a successful music career for the majority of his teens and early twenties is pretty damn impressive.
Frankly I didn’t find him to be that bad in Alpha Dog. Black Snake Moan was a terrible movie all the way around, even Jackson and Ricci sucked in it.
Ugh,that stuff sucks. Jessica Biel is a bad actress who was good in Seventh Heaven, nothing else, and I’ve never thought her a great beauty either so I don’t know when she earned all the notice she gets but even she would have done a better job of those poor plots and scripts.The “actresses” look like they were cast because they were extremely cheap, unknown talent, eager for the opportunity. I don’t think the ads are “smooth” at all,they aren’t outre or artsy but they seem to come from someone who’s trying really hard to be artsy, cool and on the edge; the first ending is direct and vulgar, no mystery about what the man is doing, not smooth, and the second ad is just boring and forgettable, also not smooth.
@Angelina
Yeah I did watch Black Snake Moan and I loved it, in fact I have the movie on DVD, but how you could say that his acting was amazing, is beyond me. Especially in comparison to Christina Ricci and Samuel L. Jackson, he clearly wasn’t able to hold his own.
God they were terrible! Bad script, bad acting… for the first vid, I was so caught up in what the hell was the point of getting dressed in the hallway to then go into the bedroom for oral that I missed her ridiculous lines and had to watch again. Was she talking to the camera? Why?? Was him going down on her supposed to be edgy? Ugh, I want my minute back.
but the director photo of the ad is goood! look he may be Fincher’s DP!
Yes, bagladey, exactly, it’s vulgar and trying too hard
Of course he wasn’t able o hld is own to seasoned professionals but he did a damned good job.
these spots are ridiculous. i’m going to give him a pass though because he’s bringing back his white-fro in The Social Network lol
He was actually pretty good in Alpha Dog. Not Oscar worthy or anything, but I was pretty impressed.
How in the world could there have not been someone attractive who could at least deliver a line without sounding like she was trying to read a cue card from 500 yards away? She’s the best they could find…?
This bitch is pissing me off. He is squandering his good reputation on things he knows cock-nothing about. You’ve conquered music, Justin. You may even have conquered fashion. You are not going to get Hollywood, and from these ads, you’re likely not going to get the upscale tequila market either.
He actually can’t sing. He squeels. There’s a difference. He’s the male Madonna: bad lyrics, horrible “singing,” dumba** personality, but can put on a show (assuming you can get past the personality, of course).
Nononono AND no.
But DAMN you’re hot.
Wow. Those are pretty terrible. They are pretty exactly what I would expect from him though. Remember when he made his own music? He should do that again.
He should really stick to music.
Um, yeah. FAIL.
Agree with everything. But is “remotest” a word? It just sounds wrong. Isn’t it the most remote? If they are going to be sophisticated, they should at least have proper grammar.
OMG they’re horrible. I think he thinks he’s making clever, highbrow ads a la those old Obsession ads (which also missed the mark, but not as badly as these do)
uuuuuuuuuuuuugh! I am so over this wanna be boy/man!
He looks hott in that top picture!
TeeHee! Someone needs to do a parody of these for that FunnyorDie site, or just do it at home and upload to YouTube. The acting will probably be waaay better.
@ Pookie, that made me laugh.
Wow, those were bad. Did anyone else have a hard time following what either woman was saying because the camera kept cutting back and forth and the lines were delivered so choppily?
And wtf was that dialogue? And for the second one, why were the men tied up? And is that right? Because if it were reversed, there’d be an outcry.
I really thought they wouldn’t be that bad but wow. Just awful.
I’ve never seen one of his movies but he always made me laugh on SNL.
Dear god – are we sure that these aren’t already a parody of some America’s Next Top Model task?
The delivery went beyond “so bad, it’s good” territory. And the models aren’t especially striking or styled to be striking. And I don’t like the lighting, it just looks murky rather than dark and brooding.
Timberlake himself I think has ok comic timing. I found him funny in The Love Guru. Yeah I know – wanna make something of it? :p
OMG those are hilariously awful.
The monologues the ladies are repeating come from famous male historical figures who were considered radical thinkers, leaders or philosophers.
I recognize the quotes but I can’t remember the actual people. The first was a quote by a philosopher that I believe advocated “libertarianism” where individuals are free to live and express themselves unrestrained by the moral constraints of society.
The second quote was by a famous military general/conqueror…I can’t remember if it was Alexander the Great or Genghis Khan, or perhaps a more recent military general like Napolean.
I’m not good at remembering dates and names but the concepts/words stick in my head. Maybe someone with more literary/historical background knows the historical figures being quoted. I’m a science nerd 🙂
What I can say is…I doubt that Justin had these quotes floating around in his head from his vast store of literary knowledge 🙂
can’t believe i wasted time watching those. he really shouldn’t quit his day job.
The second one sort of sounded familiar (Tracey Jordan said something to that effect to Kenneth on 30 Rock, yeah, I’m cultured). But the delivery is so bad and the camera work is so choppy. With no dialogue, they would’ve been a million times better.
Listen up all you really cool sheep. That was hawt. Now go back to chewing your cud.
The 2nd one literally made me cringe…continuously. and that first one? all the talking and moving around, i didn’t know what to focus on and barely focused on the words anyway. the actresses sucked, the shots and angles sucked, the ‘plot’ of each on sucked.
the cliche stereotypical depiction of women in alcohol commercials was pretty unoriginal of him too. bleh.
I didn’t think they were awful. They weren’t good, though. More like pretentious and boring. I’m pretty sure that, as michelle said, the actors are reciting excerpts from historical texts. And I think the stilted delivery is intentional. Like jt wanted to make it obvious that they were reading from famous speeches. Subtle, right?
@lee
cool sheep? Cuz we’re too mainstream to appreciate jt’s auteristic vision, right? I LOL.
I’ve never watched movies with him in it, so I’m too lazy to click play on these,lol. I’ll go by what people are saying. I do agree with comment 32…he made me laugh my ass off too on SNL.
I didn’t mind them. I thought the girls delivered…their lines…in this slightly weird…choppy way…with odd pauses…and all that…but I felt they were supposed to be sophisticated looking ads with a light and less serious feel. I thought they were modestly funny and I think they were supposed to be. Either way it’s just an ad. I’ve seen much much worse, like a three way relationship with a Swiffer, a housewife, and a mop.
Why does every trick in Hollywood seem to think they’re some kind of amazing triple threat, what with everyone being a writer and a director and a fashionista etc etc? I suppose it comes from surrounding yourself with people who are paid to tell you how gobsmackingly talented you are.
Personally, if someone was reading my writing or looking at my pics and didn’t have a bad word to say, I would phap them over the head and tell them to look again, dammit.
God, are people getting dumber and sleazier or is it just my angry old ladyness?
Hehehe Hey Kelly, GET OFF MY LAWN!
@Jean – It’s called an opinion. It is my opinion that JT was great in Black Snake Moan.