Globes fashion: Halle Berry, Heidi Klum and the rest of the worst

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I honestly gasped in horror when Heidi Klum came on screen. I mean… she looked like a damn clown. The makeup was garish and awful, the dress… might have been cute at a beach party, but on the Globes red carpet, it’s just terrible. The hair was bad too. Heidi really needs a great stylist – she’s a beautiful woman, she’s got that amazing body after four kids, for the love of God, someone get her a good makeup artist and a decent stylist.

Eva Longoria looked like hell, correct? And it was all about what was happening with her face. My immediate reaction was that she’d gotten some divorce plastic surgery, although it could be Botox too. Some think that it’s just a bad makeup job. Maybe. But whatever it was, it was terrible. As for the dress… I would have liked it on someone else.

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Halle Berry, you are a gorgeous woman with a beautiful face and a body to kill for: why do you insist on dressing in this trashy, tacky hot mess? It is beneath you. You are better than this. Remember when you used to ALWAYS be the best dressed on the carpet? You need to go back to that.

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Much like Megan Fox, Christina Aguilera could make ANYTHING look trashy. I don’t hate or love Christina’s black-lace dress, which is probably best. The best she could do was be “meh”. She’s lost some weight and she looked sober-ish on the red carpet, so it’s probably a “win” for Christina.

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I am in physical pain saying this, but I did not like Sofia Vergara’s dress at all. It looked like a reject costume from Moulin Rouge. It made Sofia look kind of cheap. Damn, I hate saying that. Do you think she’ll still let me motorboat her?

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Jennifer Lawrence in Louis Vuitton. Much, much, MUCH too fussy for someone so young and so beautiful. The dress wasn’t bad, but it should have gone to someone older.

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Kyra Sedgwick… I love you, but NO. No no no no.

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Why was little miss prom queen invited? Ugh. Carrie Underwood is the very definition of a pageant bitch. All fake smile and tight hair and mall dress.

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Photos courtesy of Fame and WENN.

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72 Responses to “Globes fashion: Halle Berry, Heidi Klum and the rest of the worst”

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  1. Eileen says:

    Eva could have benefited with some lipstick-yikes she looks like a mannequin.
    I think Halle is going through a mid life crisis because she’s been wearing clothes I’d think Avril Lavigne would wear to an awards show.
    And sorry I LOVE Kyra…dress and all! She can do no wrong with me-this is her typical look, she’s never been a cookie cutter celebrity which is why I love her!

  2. brin says:

    I pretty much agreed with you Kaiser except for Kyra….I loved her dress. But Heidi looked like she puked Pucci…it was terrible.

  3. heatheradair says:

    I’m with ya on all except Kyra Sedgwick – thought it was pretty, tasteful, age-appropriate, and loved the turquoise earrings – thought it fit her well, looked classy, comfy, and wasn’t black or all shoulder-bedazzled. Not bad……

  4. DGO says:

    I actually think Heidi Klum’s dress could have worked if it was ironed, and didn’t have that huge fake corsagey-thing at the waist.

  5. embertine says:

    I disagree with you about Kyra but otherwise you are spot on. Eva’s nude lipstick = HELL NO.

    And Halle Berry, who has a body to die for, looks as though she put on her support underwear and then couldn’t be bothered, so just draped a tulle curtain round herself and said “screw it”.

    Which, if true, would be awesome.

  6. TeeTee says:

    awww, my sweet Sofia, I don’t like the dress but I still love you.

    What is going on with Eva AND christiana A’s face’s..

    Kyra always wears that same hairstyle, hate the color but LOVE her.

    Halle please leave the corser style behind, its over now.

    I look at it like this, I guess it could have been worse, smdh

    Why IS Carrie there, she kills me!

  7. Anon says:

    I thought Kyra was ridiculously beautiful last night. Although the dress seemed too laid back for the event, I actually really liked the colour and accessories.

  8. Rachael says:

    I agree with everything except Halle. She can wear anything. I don’t think she looks trashy, I think she’s pulling it off. I think she’s one of the most gorgeous women on Earth and can therefore get away with wearing a Trader Joe’s bag and look hot.

  9. OtherChris says:

    I don’t care what Sofia Vegara wears, she’s gorgeous. Kind of like that rag that Christina Hendricks had on. It doesn’t matter.

    I would pay money to see what Carrie Underwood looks like without makeup. Something tells me there’s a lot of scary going on under that mask.

  10. Scarlet Vixen says:

    Carrie Underwood was actually nominated! LoL She co-wrote a song that was nominated for Best Song. It was from the Chronicles of Narnia movie, I think.

    I also loved Kyra Sedgwick’s look–it’s a color that not many women can pull off but she can. And her accessories matched perfectly. Her earrings were gorgeous with that dress!

  11. VV says:

    There was a lot of fugly going on last night but I quite liked Kyra’s dress and her over all look. It didn’t look full of “Try Hard” or the mall pageant/cheap bridesmaid look that Underwood constantly assaults our retinas with.

  12. xxxyyy says:

    eva looks like sandra bullock in this picture

  13. Faye says:

    Just a smear of lip gloss and a smile and Eva Longoria would have look ten times better.

    Halle’s dress looks like the slip part of a dress, but she was in such a hurry to leave, she just said eff the top part and hurried out in the under-pieces.

    Carrie Underwood…if she was going to wear a basically colorless, just shiny dress, she should have at least brought a clutch that was a fantastic color, and not a neutral shiny silver.

  14. KJ says:

    I think even had post-divorce botox AND the makeup is bad. I mean….a nude lip that’s made for someone three shades lighter than her? I don’t hate a nude lip. I’ve got DSLs so I try not to go too crazy with lip color because it can overpower my face. I tend to stick within the natural color palette of my face. But EVA, that nude lipstick is made for someone with ivory skin. Not a mexican. Slap your makeup artist cause she did you dirty.

  15. KJ says:

    Oh…Halle. I DO remember when she was ALWAYs queen of the red carpet, but that dress is fucking tacky, She’s so much better than that. Someone with her killer figure, gorgeous face and lovely skin tone should NOT be reduced to a stripper prom dress. I’m disappointed BUT I will give her a pass because when she’s been papped recently she’s been showing me outrageous boot porn. I hope this was just a hiccup. Don’t let me down at the Oscars, Halle.

  16. Louise says:

    On a previous story I said that Megan Fox had the most jackedup face. I take that back and say Christina Aguilera does. Why are so many 20-30 year olds ruining their faces? It’s disturbing.

    I agree that Heidi’s dress if great for a beach party but not for an awards show.

    I would have liked Halle’s dress if the dress wasn’t so short. She looks borderline trashy. What saves her is that she’s so beautiful. God I want her skin.

    I think Carrie was wrote or sang on the best song nominee.

  17. Sarah says:

    I LOVED Kyra Sedgewick’s look, I thought it was one of the best and most refreshing of the night. But your assessment of Carrie Underwood is dead on, SO pageanty and fake.

  18. KJ says:

    Kyra Sedgewick’s look was good in my book, too. The dress itself isn’t my cup of tea, too frilly. But the COLOR. Man, that is a beautiful shade of orange. Not so bright that it looks like a safety cone, but not so pastel that it washes her out. Gorgeous color choice.

  19. flutters says:

    Carrie Underwood was actually nominated for Best Original Song so she had a reason for being there. Her dress is supersafe but I thought it was a sign she knew her place and that she shouldn’t try to be outdoing bigger stars on the carpet. Didn’t like the hair much though.

    I liked Kyra Sedgwick’s dress. And Sofia’s dress isn’t great but she still looked wonderful in my opinion. I wish Sofia had won her award. I like Jane Lynch but Sofia deserved it more. Too much Glee love by the Golden Globes although Chris Colfer seems like a good person and a talented one too.

  20. Johnny Depp's Girl says:

    What the hell happened last night? Did they all snort psychodellics or something..

    They look AWFUL!

  21. Jayna says:

    Halle looked great, as far as I’m concerned. Heidi, what the . . . . That whole middle part was horrible. And she needs to go back to lighter blond.

    Sofia is so sexy in anything.

    I actually thought Xtina looked good — for her. Her hair was toned down. The dress wasn’t bad at all compared to others she’s worn. She’s trimmed down somewhat.

  22. kTEX says:

    Christina looks like Tina Yothers.

  23. Jayna says:

    Maybe Heidi could have pulled the whole shapeless look of the dress off if she still had her big breasts, but they’re long gone after four children.

  24. Someone Else says:

    Am I the only one convinced that Xtina is the kind who eats sticks of butter for comfort? Maybe an entire ham on a really bad day?

    Total agreement on Halle Berry — why? So beautiful, yet so trashy…

    Eva Longoria’s dress would look a billion times better without all the cleavage, but that appears to be the fashion (or lack of).

    And was January Jones’ dress a ripoff from the Fifth Element, or what?

  25. Beck says:

    I thought Kyra’s dress was pretty and a great color. I loved her earrings and bracelets as well. Halle’s dress was just okay. I agree with you about the others.

  26. Fabianne says:

    Apparently this dress is the only one that Sofia could fit into. Didn’t she tweeted earlier this week that she was having trouble with her dresses? So let’s give her break.

  27. Charissa says:

    oh well, at least Heidi Klum is growing out that awful blunt bangs mess she had last year. I hated that haircut on her!!!

  28. Lem says:

    How did Anne Hathaway not make this list? That dress was something else.

  29. Vanessa says:

    Am I the only one that kinda liked Sofia’s dress? I like that she doesnt look overly-breasty, I like the color, I like that it is age appropriate..

    Speaking of age appropriate, Halle, Sweetie, yes, you have the bod and we all know that, but please dress with some class and for your age, you can be beauitful and classy in your 40’s! Talk about trying too hard…

    Heidi! WTH?

  30. Az says:

    The only way that dress would have looked good on Eva Longoria is if she were a foot taller. And I find that the amount of clothing covering Halle Berry is inversely proportional to how good her movie is.

  31. Kelbear says:

    I have always thought that Eva Longoria tries to hard.

  32. hairball says:

    No one has yet explained what has happened to Christina A’s FACE??

    Overnight she became her mom. It is SO strange!

  33. Mia Girl says:

    While I agree with the comments about Eva’s make-up/styling, I thought she wore the h**l out of that dress. I liked it.

    Carrie Underwood – MAJOR BLAH. And honestly, as much as she tries to hide it and sugarcoat it, I think she has major attitude and is a generally self-centered, unpleasant diva. I get that vibe from her.

  34. bros says:

    oh longoria in another mermaid dress? wake me up when that changes.

    heidi came on screen and I gasped too and said she looks like a consumptive madame at a french brothel in the 1600’s from the neck up. and I like Sedgwicks dress. great color combo.

  35. Abby says:

    I liked Carrie’s everything. I thought eva looked beautiful. I saw way too many high high slits straight up the front last night. I think I saw a couple presenter hoo-has…

  36. brenda says:

    Kyra looked gorgeous. Her dress, hair, makeup, accessories were all perfect.
    Agree with everything else. Especially Hale…what was she thinking?

  37. Kim says:

    Kasier – u r spot on with Halle. She always wears dresses that r trashy, cheap & show way to much skin esp at her age.

    She is obviously having hard time w ageing and so desperately wants people to think she is hot hence why she dresses like a 2 bit hooker.

    Sad when she is so pretty and would look so much prettier and classier in appropriate clothes.

    Doesnt she have any female friends to tell her this? She needs a wardrobe intervention asap!

  38. Kaye1 says:

    No, Vanessa, you are not alone. I love Sophia’s dress and not just because I like her. I love the color and the thin black belt that accentuates her tiny waist. I think her body looks great and not at all vulgar, which can happen pretty easily with boobs like that.

  39. Kim says:

    Heidi dress is way to casual for Globes. Christina looks ridiculous! Dress is way to tight and not for her body type. Why is her face so puffy lately? alcohol? or to many fillers? Looks terrible.

    I love Sofia- think she could picked a better dress, dont love the bow. Same with Kyra. Not terrible but not doing her any favors.

    Didnt someone wear the dress Carrie Underwood is wearing to another big event? Ive seen this dress before?

  40. Judy says:

    Agree w/ all the assesments. Love Halle Berry, but she looked like a street walker. I think she may be the most beautiful woman on the face of the earth. And I am so SICK of nude lips.

  41. samihami says:

    I think Carrie looks pretty good. Why all the hate? Aguilera-bad choice and does not flatter her figure at all. I like Kyra Sedgwick’s dress. I think she looks cute.

  42. Siren6 says:

    It looks like Kyra Sedgwick’s dress was so close to Michelle Williams 2006 Oscar dress I had to do a double take:
    http://cosmicallychic.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/michelle-williams.jpg

  43. Mairead says:

    I think Kyra looks great and it’s a fantastic, unusual colour dress.

    Isn’t black lace an Aguilera standby for the red carpet? I vaguely remember her wearing similar tat years ago.

    And Halle darling, when even Blake Lively won’t touch your dress, you know you’ve gone to far.

  44. irishserra says:

    Mall dress… heh. Funny.

  45. Ari says:

    Eva should have worn Xtina’s dress.

    Xtina should have worn Motorboats dress.

    Halle looks hot.

    Kyra looks just fine!

    Heidi’s smile is RADIANT but yes the hair is tragic, the dress is meh.

    Jennifer would have looked so much sexier and polished in Eva’s dress

    Carrie needs a makeover.

    Motorboat should just go naked ^__^

  46. Meredith says:

    Kyra looks amazing!!

  47. Maritza says:

    Kyra looks gorgeous and I really like Jennifer Lawrence’s dress too, for the rest I agree totally with the comments.

  48. Rosanna says:

    “Megan Fox, Christina Aguilera could make ANYTHING look trashy”

    you forgot to mention Christina Hendricks and voila the trashy trio is complete 🙂

  49. Sara says:

    Heidi is by far the worst dressed out of all of these ladies. She should no better! She is definitely out!

  50. sam says:

    Christina’s face has changed somehow….

  51. original kate says:

    maybe halle’s mirror was hung too high and she didn’t see the bottom half? that’s what i’m choosing to believe. heidi has no such excuses, however. ugh. sofia’s dress is bad – that shade of shiny, pinkish-red always looks cheap.

  52. Pia says:

    Forget the dresses, what is going on with Christina Aguilera’s face?

  53. June says:

    I like Kira’s dress, but the orange is either just the wrong color, or bad next to red.

  54. hyuch says:

    Kyra loked incredible.

    Kaye1 I also thought Sofia looked amazing…what exactlky is wrong with te dress, it highlights all teh many wonderful things about her body, long arms, tiny waist etc etc…and doesn’t make the breasts overwhelm evreything (though they look great too!)

  55. CB Rawks says:

    Kyra’s dress is the same basically-ugly-mustardy-citrus idea as Michelle Williams wore in Brokeback Mountain year. Everyone liked that one. Shrug.

  56. Isa says:

    I liked Carries dress. But her make up was off.

  57. Camille says:

    Totally agree with the write up. They all looked awful or trashy. Not good.

    @Pia: I was totally thinking the same thing yesterday. She may have lost weight, but why does her face look so bloated/fat??

  58. shockedandappalled says:

    Totally disagree with you on Kyra Sedgwick. Thought that was a huge win. She was my favourite of the night, along with Anne Hathaway. Also loved Jennifer Lawrence. All the others I agree with you on though. I also called Heidi Klum a clown. Just embarassing.

  59. AngelMay says:

    Not just bad makeup on Eva; looks like she’s paid a visit to the Kardashian plastic surgeon.

    I like Christina as a singer, but she looks an utter trailer park mess. Hopeless.

  60. Mizz Tickles says:

    Eva Longoria’s dress would have looked great, in red carpet red, on Christina Hendricks. Christina Aguiliera’s dress is so sexy and she does have a great figure. Carrie Underwood looks like the ballerina Barbie I had as a kid.

  61. Dhavy says:

    I agree Hathaway’s dress was ugly and so was JLo’s glitter poncho!

  62. JM says:

    Heidi and Kyra both look great. Their dresses are flowy and offbeat with whimsy. So much better than safe and cookie-cutter. And Sofia is gorgeous.

    Why so much hate for Underwood? She’s actually cuter w/o all the makeup, sorry to tell you.

    Whoever said Xtina looks like Tina Yothers – you rule! SOOO true.

  63. Megan says:

    I think Eva’s dress is absolutely stunning, but I agree that her makeup is awful… makes her look like she has no mouth. The dark eye makeup/foundation-ed over lips is so 2005.

  64. whatuseeiswhatuget says:

    Yeah…Kaiser totally missed on Kyra. The color of her dress is perfect on her & a BIG trend for 2011. And the cut, although not the most flattering, is age-appropriate and looks incredibly comfortable.
    And Sofia looks amazing! Bad color choice? Sure. But those curves and humps make up for everything. She could wear a garbage bag & a waist belt and still look fabulous!

  65. Crash2GO2 says:

    Call me crazy, but the more I look at Heidi’s dress, the more I like it.

  66. gabs says:

    Why isnt Michelle Williams here? Hers was BY FAR the worst of the night with the ugly daisies. EW.

    Kyra looked great you must be on crack.

    Sofia did look a bit cheap but she worked it and it looked better on camera than pictures I think.

    Carrie Underwood looked HORRIBLE. She dresses up for these shows like its prom! no fashion sense.

    Jennifer laurence- I HATE when young beautiful actresses with access to anything wear hideous old lady dresses (ex. Carrie Mulligan)

    I still think the worse was michelle williams

  67. Scott R says:

    Seriously what is wrong with you people, how small and pathetic is you own life when you need to fill it with mocking people for what type of dress or suite they have on. My guess is you sit there in your stretch pants and sweater set just waiting for your stories to come on so there can be a little drama in your sad little life…. Here is an idea, try to something on your own and not just tear down someone else, while I agree actor is a silly thing to idolize, at least they are DOING SOMETHING ……Freaks

  68. Someone Else says:

    @ScottR —

    Read the name of this site. We ARE “Doing Something”. It’s called “Bitching about Celebrities”.

    Since you take issue with that, you can leave. We won’t miss you.

    Oh, and I wouldn’t visit D-Listed. Their comments make ours look nice.

  69. Mairead says:

    @ ScottR – suite?

    I know that some of the dresses look like fancy upholstery, but that’s taking it “sofa” 😆

  70. jayem says:

    I thought Kyra Sedgwick looked really pretty. I loved the color!

    Loved Carrie Underwood’s dress. Just not on her.

  71. fwozbo says:

    Loved Kyra’s look, too.

  72. Sandee Gerhardt says:

    Angelic dresses indeed! They look better when adorned on the little angels themselves. These cherubs look like they have indeed descended from heaven!