Matt Damon: “My wife is my soul mate. I can’t imagine being without her.”

Matt Damon has a new essay in The Guardian in which he goes on at length about his family life and personal values. It’s similar to earlier sentiments we’ve heard from Matt, but the way he puts it all together in one cohesive package is absolutely swoon-worthy. This is a man who adores his wife (he calls her his soul mate for God’s sake!), cherishes his family and strives to be a better person every day.

I didn’t grow up with great privilege, nor did I grow up wanting for anything. I was a middle-class kid and, relative to the rest of the world, that’s great wealth. As a parent, I think the question is, how do you raise any kid with a true understanding and context of what kind of life they have versus what kind of life other people have? It’s a constant struggle no matter who you are.

My wife and I have a one year old, a three year old, a five year old and a 13 year old. All daughters. One of the reasons we live in New York is because, without having to explain things to the girls, they can walk around the streets and just by looking around them see that the world is composed of all different people from different walks of life, different languages and different socio-economic backgrounds. They pick it up through osmosis. Eventually I plan to take them on some of the trips that I go on to developing countries. That’s what my mother did with me when I was a teenager.

When I was 15, 16, 17 we used to go backpacking across Mexico and Guatemala. We would begin by doing a language school course. They work by immersion therapy – you go to school for six hours a day and then you go home with a Mexican family. Spanish is the only language spoken. After a couple of weeks, we’d be ready to take a bus and travel around the country. I remember travelling on buses stuffed with chickens. Being from Boston, I’d never seen stuff like that and I’d never seen poverty like I saw there. The way people live out in the country. They are very poor, living in shacks – it’s a type of poverty you don’t really encounter in the north-east of America.

My parents divorced when I was young but I was brought up in two really loving households. I didn’t have a contentious relationship with my mom or dad. I am not quite sure why but I never felt the need to lie to them. I never hid anything.

My mother is a professor of early childhood education. When I was two she would say she knew I was going to be an actor. And that she knew that my brother was going to be an artist: he’s a painter and sculptor. She could see from the way we played and what we were drawn to. My kindergarten teacher used to say to her I can’t get him out of the dressing-up area. My mother would say: “That’s fine – leave him there.” I was trying on every costume and role playing! My parents said: “We want you to act if that’s what you really want to do. But why do you want to do it professionally? Do local theatre. Acting professionally will only interfere with going to college. Why are you so impatient?”

My wife is my soul mate. I can’t imagine being without her. Being a parent, as any parent knows, is a lot of work whether you are together or not. Our 13 year old is terrific, and she’s a big help, but with the other kids it’s just non stop. We like to do a lot of the family stuff together, particularly when we get them to school in the mornings. It starts at 6.30am. Once you get them off to school there’s always a sigh of relief. Then we have one hour where we can go and get a cup of coffee together.

Before I had kids I remember Don [Cheadle] saying to me that one of the great things about being an actor is that when you’re not working you can be there in a way that most dads can’t. And it’s true you can be there 100% of the time – with everything.

[From The Guardian]

As a side note on how Matt’s parents tried to teach him that they were privileged relative to the rest of the world, I tried to do the same with my kid with laughable results. I told my son that we were better off than 99% of the world’s population since we’re comfortable and don’t want for anything, and he was like “We’re rich, right? How much money do we have? Do we have a million dollars?” Then I tried to give him the running water and electricity speech. He sort-of gets it. I loved the story about how Matt’s mom took him to Mexico when he was a teenager. I’d like to do something like that with my son too.

I didn’t excerpt the whole article, and there’s more at the source, including a wonderful story about how Matt paid for his daughter’s entire fifth grade class to go to South Africa while he was filming Invictus, just so he could be with his family. If this guy has any skeletons in his closet or a mean bone in his body I would be incredibly surprised. Lucy is a lucky bitch. Do you think there’s ever going to be a scandal with Damon at some point? I think he got all his partying out at a young age and that he’s completely sincere about loving his family and wife, but that doesn’t mean he’s immune to temptation. I hope it never happens though.

Matt is promoting We Bought a Zoo, which is out in the UK now and comes out on DVD on April 3rd in the US. I haven’t seen it yet and am really looking forward to it.

Matt and Lucy are shown on vacation in St. Barts with Chris Hemsworth and Elsa Pataky on 1-19-12. They’re also shown at LAX on 3-5-12 and at the We Bought a Zoo NY premiere on 12-12-11. I’m bummed that they didn’t go to the London premiere! Credit: and Fame

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57 Responses to “Matt Damon: “My wife is my soul mate. I can’t imagine being without her.””

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  1. Maguita says:

    Lucky bitch indeed!!!

    Matt is a diamond in the rough. I think he is truly grateful for what he has, and thrives on not taking it all for granted.

    Whatever skeleton he may have, and most Hollywood actors do, my only wish is that it doesn’t interfere with his being a good human being. Don’t care if he is a closeted gay man, or likes it professionally kinky on the side. as long as it doesn’t make him some kind of misery-dishing monster, he is more than ok in my book!
    Lucky Lucy indeed!

    • bns says:

      Lucky she is.

      And she was a bartender when she met him. I wish a rich, famous and kind-hearted actor would come into my job and sweep me off of my feet *sigh*

      Kidding…kind of

      • Maguita says:

        LOL! In my old cynic heart, lies a young girl who still holds such nonsensical dreaming!

  2. Bite me says:

    Nope am not going to be snarky… Maybe just a little isn’t matt constantly working so I wonder how much time he actually spends with his soulmate… Best of luck Matt am rooting for u and ur soulmate
    Edit: just read the full article : they have a two week rule about how much time they spent apart

  3. dahlianoir says:

    I just love how he grabs his wife on the red carpet. 4 kids and he still wants to take her no matter where they are. Favorite couple so far.

    • TQB says:

      Have you SEEN her?? Seriously, she is smokin’ hot. Even when pregnant. For me this is one of those, well, i love him, but no way can i compete with her, so good on ya.

      • Sophie says:

        Are you serious? Smokin’ hot? She is average at best. Way below average if we’re talking hollywood standards. I don’t understand why he picked her.

      • janie says:

        i agree.smoking hot.
        average? what planet are you on?

      • emmaline says:

        She’s average on a good day. She gets bonus points for choosing tasteful implants. Her face is slightly goofy, but still cute. Overall, I’d rate her a solid “meh.”

  4. cody says:

    I have observed, the more actors talk about their marriage or relationships in interviews and how in love they are , the more they are inclined to get a divorce. Lately, Matt has done this in some interviews. He talks about her now as his soul mate,but in 10 years when there are bumps in the marriage or his career , then it will be time for a divorce and a new young thing.

    • terra says:

      I was just about to post this. This couple really likes to advertise how in love they are – the groping on the red carpet, all the kissing snapshots, the interviews detailing how great the marriage is, etc. I hope it’s all real, but it reminds me of Heidi/Seal and Will/Jada.

      My guess is that this is a bearding situation that worked out well since they both love kids.

      • Emma - the JP lover says:

        @Terra …

        Have you never noticed that the only time you ever see Matt and Lucy poising together for photos is on the Red Carpet or other Film Industry events? If they’re not on the Red carpet and know the Paps are about, they walk apart … one several feet ahead of the other … so the Paps rarely have shots of them together outside of the Red carpet.

        Any time you see a rare photo of Matt out and about with his wife and/or children and they’re together, you’d better believe they aren’t aware that they’re being photographed. When his 5-year-old daughter was born, he and his wife were photographed out pushing their daughter in a stroller. As soon as Matt became aware of a photographer (and there’s a shot of him stopping and staring into the camera), he crossed the street alone so the photographer wouldn’t get shots of him with his family.

        Isn’t the use of high scope camera lens for some photos, like the ones above–where no one is remotely aware that they’re being photographed–and ones where celebrities are painfully aware of the camera (like the fourth photo above of Matt and Lucy arriving at LAX)obvious?

    • Carolyn says:

      I agree. My first thought was “what gossip/upcoming bad PR are they trying to divert?”. I adore Matt especially as Jason Bourne (swoon!) and don’t care if he closeted and in a bearding relationship.

  5. Anna says:

    I just love him. He seems like such a good man. And their 13-year-old is Lucy’s from a previous relationship, isn’t she? I think it’s great how you can never tell that she’s not biologically Matt’s, he clearly loves all 4 of his daughters the same.

    I was pleasantly surprised by We Bought a Zoo – it was a sweet film and he was great in it. I cried buckets, though.

  6. Tapioca says:

    Yes Matt Damon, you are a perfect gentleman, husband and father. I must watch your movie, even if it has mediocre reviews and Scarlett Johannsson in it.

    Maybe I’m a little cynical, but so many actors have laid it on thick and then been caught with their hand in the cookie jar, I’m now half expecting he’ll shortly be found in the Nevada desert burying a dead hooker!

    • NancyMan says:

      I have to agree with you… Lets wait and see when the other shoe or the panties drop!

    • FeverDream says:

      We Bought A Zoo made me cry like it was Titanic all over again.

      Love that corny ass movie.

  7. Kaiser says:

    Can you get pregnant from reading an interview? Because it just happened for me.

  8. Franny says:

    whoa, everyone here seems to have drank the bitch potion this morning. I thought it was a very sweet essay. They seem to really enjoy being around each other, which is inspiring.

  9. Sapphire says:

    If this is for real, love both of them. And am dying for those earrings in the first photo!

  10. lola8 says:

    Makes him even more attractive to say that…I hope they last.

  11. jo says:

    I am sorry.. he is talented, but white bread looking, and her.. ummm fugly.. don’t forget he dumped a string of women on his way up including minnie driver on Oprah.. she even said she found out that way too..

  12. Kerfuffles says:

    Aw, this is sweet. He seems like a good egg.

    The Gossip Cynic in me does worry a little when an actor starts talking about how great his/her spouse and family is. But I hope in this case I’m just being a cynic.

  13. Jackie says:

    whenever someone uses the term soulmate, i get suspicious. maybe i am just extra bitchy today.

  14. lucy2 says:

    He seems like he’s grown into a really great man, and their family seems very happy.
    I too was pleasantly surprised by We Bought A Zoo, it turned out to be very sweet and touching. I’d recommend it.

  15. EmmaStoneWannabe says:

    Aw I think they are cute. I hope they beat the odds and have a long, happy, healthy marriage.

  16. Julie says:

    i wish everybody the best, its just the “gossip experience” that tells me “hey i heard this so often from famous guys and then they were caught with another chick”.

    as much as i love gossip i personally prefer that couples that are not too much in your face. i dont know i wouldnt count matt to those in your face couples as of yet but its becoming more and more like that.

  17. P.J. says:

    I don’t know Matt myself but I do know people who went to high school with him and know his family, and this guy is for real. He’s really a normal person, not a Hollywood type at all.

    The experiences he’s describing are fairly typical of someone growing up in our city — there is a big emphasis on multiculturalism, the high school has a fantastic drama program and there are a lot of small local theatres, and historically many well-known actors have lived here. A lot of his classmates have also wound up living in NYC!

  18. Laurie M. says:

    However he got there…he is sweet now. What a fine gentleman to talk about his wife & children like that. He’s a good one.

  19. reg says:

    According to blind items Matt Damon has men on the side, and his wife does not mind, a woman like that is really hard to find.

    • Emma - the JP lover says:

      I don’t believe that Blind Item for a moment. People love to ‘out’ closet cases (I’m looking at the open secrets about Tom Cruise and John Travolta). Matt and Lucy have been together now for just about … oh heck, let’s just say 10 years (they met while he filmed “Stuck on You”).

      If Matty had a secret yen for ‘boys to men,’ it would have been one of those ‘open secrets’ back when he and Ben Affleck filmed “Good Will Hunting.” I’m sure some of the Boston home boys would have just loved to spill that little nugget.

    • Valerie says:

      Yup, I read that blind item, too. I can totally see it. But I don’t think a beard like that is hard to find if you’re wealthy enough. She might be really into having kids, making the trade off worth it. Or she might have a guy on the side, or she might not be that sexually motivated.

  20. reg says:

    Yeah, there are lots of blind items about him meeting up with men and women some really weird stuff, but by Hollywood standards everything goes, so this is pretty standard. Don’t think these too wil be married for life.
    Hugh Jackman is gay and has a seperate apartment for his lover and keeping it under the radar too.

  21. YumYum says:

    I predict a divorce in a year.

    When celebs start talking how perfect their marriages etc…

  22. kab says:

    they say they are family oriented .but they are always out partying taking trips as if they are a single couple. he goes on and on about how smart ,strong and wonderful his wife is.who does he think hes kidding.

  23. reg says:

    The Red Flag was when he went from dating actresses such as Penelope Cruz and Wynona Ryder to a fugly waitress who served his table, dated her for 5 minutes and married her in a quick civil ceremony at City Hall.
    At least Hugh Jackman found himself an attractive beard.

    • Emma - the JP lover says:

      Actually, Lucy was a Bartender and they dated for 2 1/2 years before getting married in (October?) 2005.

      Some of the people commenting here seem a bit scornful of the fact that Matt managed to find a normal lady to marry. Or is it that he is still just a regular guy who is not into living the life of a Movie Star?

    • mimi says:

      So true.
      They should all take note from NPH. He is a real class act.

      His career didn’t suffer for one second, we all respect him and he is leading his life in the most beautiful way.

      This is a shame they are dragging children into these sort of “marriages.”

      They should have children with their real mates, not with showbiz beards.

  24. judyjudy says:

    I love Matt Damon. I mentioned this before but one of the reasons I love him so much is I have never ever seen a picture of his children.

  25. original sandy says:

    i don’t believe that he is gay, until he says so, it’s just rumors, they probably wishes he was, Matt is cute, talented, seems to love being a family man, who wouldn’t want that? it’s so easy to start rumors based on absolutely nothing, but That actor denies it, he’s considered homophobe. some guy hit on him and he rejected him. hence the rumors. see how easy that was? i made it up, but you can’t verify it.

  26. Granger says:

    I think Matt married a waitress instead of an actress because he wanted a traditional wife who would stay home with the kids and “keep house” for him. I just don’t think he wanted to be with an actress who would always be competing with him, in a sense, for career time. Whenever he gushes about Lucia, I think he’s just acknowledging how lucky he is to have found someone whose given him what he really wanted.

  27. Turd Fergussen says:

    I’ve never been a big fan of his (his acting is *meh, his writing is much better — though he loses me with all his liberal politic stuff) but this sweet affection he has with his wife really makes me think of him in a new way. Any Hollywood actor who can marry a civilian and happily raise a family without cheating, drugs and scandal has my respect.

  28. Anna says:

    kab – you’re right – they are always out partying and off vacationing or doing the red carpet WITHOUT their children. Lucy quit her bartending job after just meeting Matt Damon and left her kid with her mom (not the kid’s dad) so she could travel the world with Matt Damon – and them live with him in NY – without her kid – for several years. Then she got pregnant and he secretly married her at City Hall. Matt talks about how his mom made him learn Spanish and took him to all these third world countries – but he has admitted in several interviews that is own kids CANNOT SPEAK SPANISH – despite the fact that Lucy and her mother (who lives with them) are both Spanish speakers. He is fake through and through. The reason you have never seen pictures of his kids is because Matt and Lucy do not spend any time with their kids!

    • Emma - the JP lover says:

      @Anna, who wrote: “they are always out partying and off vacationing or doing the red carpet WITHOUT their children. Lucy quit her bartending job after just meeting Matt Damon and left her kid with her mom (not the kid’s dad) so she could travel the world with Matt Damon – and them live with him in NY – without her kid – for several years. Then she got pregnant and he secretly married her at City Hall.”

      Matt Damon had three movies to promote in 2011: “The Adjustment Bureau,” “Contagion,” and “We Bought a Zoo.” So yes, he spent most of 2011 promoting those films. That seems to be acceptable PR activity here at Celebitchy … at least when it comes to Jennifer Aniston.

      Matt moved to Miami when he met Lucy. She didn’t ‘leave her kid with her mother and live with Matt in New York for a couple of years’ because they only just moved to New York 2 1/2 years ago. They stayed in Miami so long because Lucy thought it was important for her daughter to be near her father.

      They quietly got married at City Hall, without fanfare, because Lucy was a divorced Catholic and they obviously didn’t want any photographers to show up. But their engagement was no secret. They announced it the same time they confirmed that Lucy was pregnant in the summer of 2005; which, by the way, happened two years after they started dating.

      I could be wrong, but I thought Lucy and Matt’s relationship didn’t become ‘live in serious’ until after she visited him in Berlin while he was filming “The Bourne Supremacy” in late 2003 or early 2004. She was probably still working as a Bartender up to that point.

  29. Nan209 says:

    He heminds me of my hubby…I mean that! Totally a mushy gooey sweetheart. We went through our tough times and our salad days but we are still together I think in part because of his attitude which is very similar to MD (without the money). Today is our 15 year anniversary … Been together 17….so I’m a little mushy anyway…lol

  30. Rux says:

    I see where he is coming from now. I lived in Communist Romania, Bucharest specifically. My dad’s family had money, old name, etc. My mom came from the country where until two years ago, we went to visit and used the “outhouse” — that is not a joke.

    We left Romania because of asylum due to communism (I stood in line for 3 hours when I was 5 to get my mom bananas). We moved to NY then to Louisiana. We were dirt poor and my dad at that time made $65 a week (1986).

    They were both from different backgrounds, one from the poor country and one privileged. Not once did I ever feel poor or rich, I was happy and loved. It is the material things that make people become dissatisfied; they own you, not you them.

  31. jemma says:

    Does anyone believe those boat photos aren’t staged? I’ll hand it to the photographer for suggesting that he should shoot from a neighboring boat, as if they’re so interesting that the paps chase them with speed boats. They went the extra mile to make it look genuine, but I’m not convinced.

    Also, yeah, he’s probably gay, which is fine, though the beard is silly.

  32. Original Lucy says:

    Can he really be this perfect…mmmmm…he just seems to try sooooo hard to make himself seem like the perfect person and they have the perfect marriage…and the perfect family…hopefully this is true, but the cynic in me keeps whispering “wait for the scandal…wait for the scandal”…and I applaud him for trying to show his children that not everyone lives the easy, rich, life that they do and I would love to that, however I am a little busy working 60 hours a week and cooking and cleaning and doing errands and trying to do homework with my kids and all the rest…these Hollywood people just don’t get that not everyone in America lives like they do…they think that the only poverty in the world is outside the USA…and before everyone starts yelling at me that our poverty isn’t as bad as other places, I get that…I just wish that these actors would realize that we don’t all live in mansions and vacation in Cabo….we don’t all have months off work at a time or the money to travel to the next state let alone another country…anyway, sorry for the rant…I actually like Matt…just feeling poor and tired today…

  33. Maritza says:

    I wish everyone were as lucky as them.

  34. kab says:

    the people who says he wanted too marry some one who would stay home and look after the children and home . she just pops them out but doesnt stay home and look after them . she doesnt let matt out without her. terrible mother when you have children for insurance and a big paycheck.marrying a celeberty doesnt make you one even if you are out there hob nobbing with them.

  35. Hina says:

    She is one lucky lady but I think she is down to earth. It would be great if Matt had a son to balance it all as I think living in a houseful of women would be quite exhausting!

  36. Erin says:

    Love it! I’m so lucky that after about 10 years together, my now husband and I feel the same way about each other 🙂