Happy birthday, Lindsay Lohan. The Cracken turns 26 years old today. Can you believe it? Can you believe she survived her 25th year? Her 24th? Her 23rd? Lindsay’s crack shenanigans make it feel like dog years, right? I can’t believe she’s ONLY 26. She looks 40-something. And she has the liver of a 60-year-old alcoholic, I can guarantee. So, how did Lindsay celebrate her Birthday Eve (because crackies celebrate things like “birthday’s eve”)? She went to a club with her “friends”. And she did NOT drink! If you believe that.
Party time for Lindsay Lohan! The Liz & Dick actress let loose during her birthday bash at West Hollywood nightclub Bootsy Bellows early Sunday. The party took place one day ahead of her 26th birthday, which she celebrates on Monday. A little after midnight, the actress, clad in a tight pink minidress, hit up the hotspot with a group of her close friends.
“She sat at her table close to the DJ,” a witness tells Us Weekly. “[Up-and-coming group] Speakerz was there and performed several songs for Lindsey. She was loving them and looked happy and carefree as she danced all around with her friends.”
Later, the star was presented with cake and Sprinkles Cupcakes, and the whole room broke out singing “Happy Birthday.”
“There was a ton of alcohol at Lindsey’s table, however she didn’t appear to be drinking,” the witness adds.
Perhaps it’s good that the headline-making actress is laying low, especially after her scary June 15 incident where she was treated for exhaustion.
Yes, I’m sure she just sipped from a water bottle all evening. In between trips to the bathroom to do some lines. Because it’s super-important that we all know that she wasn’t drinking!!!
So, what will “26” mean for Lindsay Lohan? Probably not much in the way of career achievements or anything. Probably a lot of the same old BS from her. Speaking of, remember that completely gross and inappropriate photo shoot Crackie did with Terry Richardson last week? Well, she pissed off a ton of people – especially some high-profile advocacy groups, like Hopeline (suicide prevention) and The Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence both issued statements about Lindsay being so dumb and crackie – you can read them here.
Photos courtesy of WENN, Terry’s Diary.
SHE’S 26?????????????????????? Wow imagine when she hits 40?
FYI, kaiser I am 42 and people think I am in my 20s Women who are 40+ do not look like that!
That’s gonna be one hard FORTY!
+1
She is the epitome of the term…”Rode hard and put away wet”
Thank you! see my tirade below.
I am 40, not 41, 40 and if this weren’t such a public forum i’d send a link to my photo but scared to do that!
Seriously, I love reading this website and I’m sure you don’t care if you lose on reader but I’ve come to dread these Lilo posts because I know there’s going to be a Lilo/40 bashing and it just irritates me!
All I have to say is look at the Hollywood celebs that are over 40. Or, if you still don’t believe me, find a way that i can send my photo to you anonymously so you can PROVE that SOME 40+ and above take good care of their health and looks and look young n’ great!!
This is about HEALTH vs. BAD HEALTH CHOICES not AGE!
Hard to believe she and Carly Rae Jepsen are the same age.
I’ll be 26 in August. Just to put this in perspective…I got carded to see Magic Mike. You have to be 17 to see a rated R movie. My youngest sister (19) didn’t get carded…j/s.
47 and on oxygen… Saw Magic Mike w/ old friends I grew up w/. Lol…I got carded, they didn’t. Didn’t hear the end ofmit either.. Lol Lindsay looks older way older than any 40 yr old or 50 yr old I know…. Even w/ sun damage.
Last time I was in the US I got carded at a couple of bars – I turn 38 this year!! LOL
When I was 29 I was carded for entry into an R-rated movie. I thanked the ticket seller!
Kind of funny Samigirl, my birthday is August 26.
she will never make 40…
Yes, she will. She’s a cockroach.
@ jen LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that comment is priceless!
She’s a CRACKROACH. (Tolerance of a member of the Stones combined with the tenacity of a cockroach.)
Actually, short of a miracle, I can’t imagine Lohan hitting 40. I’m not even sure she’ll make it to 30 for that matter. There’s only so much abuse a body can take…
Man, I hope this girl gets to see a lot more birthdays. I worry she’s not going make it sometimes. It’s really sad.
You only worry she’s not going to make it “sometimes”??
Oh, it must 26 in dog years then????????????
Okay….this person needs to stop having close-ups done. She looks great far away & with lots of make-up. This is just way too real. She looks like a 40 year old alchie.
Honestly, I don’t think anyone has to worry about what she’ll look like when she’s 40.
Not to be a biatch, but….just sayin’.
i actually thought shes younger 24 or something…
She’ll be joining the 27 Club.
Yup! That’s exactly what I thought as well.
If she does, she will be an insult to any of the members.
One more year and she gets to join the 27 club. Too harsh?
On another note, hot damn, that’s a rough photo. I can’t believe she’s actually younger than me….
nope, not harsh sadly is the truth.
Marilyn Monroe lived 1926-1962. The 50th Anniversary of her death is coming up this Summer. 26 could be good enough for the is trick.
August 5th is MM’s death-date. I don’t think AT ALL that LL is depressed enough to want to die that day, but I wouldn’t put it past her to pull a big CLOSE CALL on Marilyn’s day. The Cracken wants the comparison, and the well-wishing aftermath.
Yikes…next year is the infamous 27th…better watch out, Lilo!
@Tiegs….I didn’t think so…lol.
I so don’t think she’s going to make it to her 30th and I don’t mean that to be mean in anyway. I’m not wishing bad things in her but the way she’s going it’s just not going to happen.
She’s a great poster child for don’t do drugs, don’t drink, don’t tan. I have a baby face, which I of course hated when I was a teenager but now that I’m 27 and I still get mistaken for a 19 year old I’m rather happy about it. She had a baby face too and she could still look so pretty, I think she’s beautiful, but she’s done everything possibly to age herself and make herself look terrible.
what are you talking about? Don’t you know she looks just like Liz Taylor…BAAAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
Haha, you’re right I’m just jealous of how much she looks like the great Elizabeth Taylor.
I have to say, it freaks me out to think of her dying at such a young age. I won’t mourn her as a fan, but dying of an OD or from repeated abuse has to be scary. The idea of anyone dying alone (as everyone in the 27 club has) ties me up in knots a little!
Meh. I work in the Alcohol & Other Drugs sector and you’d be surprised at what people can live through and how long they can go on for. I know people in their fifties who hit it a lot harder than she does.
Another day, another reason to drink and act like a fool. Nothing new here.
I hope that she becomes the 4th Mrs. Tom Cruise! Lilo is exactly the sort of person who could get sucked into a cult.
There were rumors that her assistant/enabler is a scientologist and that she is now very interested. I think there were even pics when they left the celebrity centre.
From you fingertips to god’s ears!
Tom Cruise would NEVER marry a girl like LiLo. He likes them pure and fresh-faced with a clean image and rep.
exactly right, origianalkitten, he likes the girl next door type to maintain his all american boy image…what a joke…
Yeah, but those women wise up sooner or later. He needs to “save” a lost cause with a weak mind, and have her indebted to him forever.
Also, she could be the spokesperson trying to put a positive spin on Co$… until she falls off every wagon on the train, of course.
TMZ must get paid a certain amount to post the same line in every story about her: “There was alcohol, but she was not drinking.” Who on God’s green earth believes that? Maybe it is like a joke that they all have over there at the yukkfactory known as TMZ: “Hey guys, let’s put in AGAIN how she wasn’t drinking! Hahahahahahaaaaa!”
Depending on what kind of recreational drugs she had in her system, she may not have been drinking.
For the last couple of years, TMZ has been firmly in Lohan’s corner. They are willing to post any bs “positive” spin her pathetic team can spit out.
She disgusts me and isn’t even interesting enough to warrant all of this attention, negative or not. At her “height” of fame, she didn’t do anything stellar enough for us to care if she screws her life up or not…she never contributed much to the world, and she clearly never will. I feel like I need not see her face any more..I am getting Lohan Rage Syndrome.
She is a hot mess.
So next year she will be 27. What a magical year that will be.. I am talking about that certain club..
Isn’t a prerequisite of the 27 Club entail having had actual talent? If so, I think our little Lilo will dodge the proverbial bullet. . .
Did her mother write that for US magazine? What a load of crap. “Carefree”? “Scary incident with exhaustion”? The wholesome cupcakes? Oh please.
Put a fork in her – she’s done
Considering the hoopla around her just barely making it to her 21 st birthday (goodness, remember that drama) I guess she’s maintaining (?)
She’s only 26? Man she’s living a hard life, wait till she hits 30 and looks 50.
Jeez. I spent a LOT of time outdoors as a kid and always had a deep summer tan. I just turned 39 last month. AND I LOOK YOUNGER THAN HER. (Makes me feel good about myself, and really sorry and kinda horrified for her at the same time, you know?)
She and her crazy family are completely to blame for her problems, but it’s hard to look at that last picture without feeling at least a little sympathy.
at the terry richards shoot, she was doing lines. it´s clearly visible in on of those pics. there are scratched, whitey cd-covers in the background on the nightstand. it´s a common way. you either use a mirror or a cd-cover. the cd covers always suffer from the scratching.
so, happy birthday lindsay.
good thing you have changed so much.
On one pic she has coke on her nostrils too.
I figured there would be a big news story about her weekend. She is probably pretty pi**ed at all the press time Katie Holms is getting. I thought she would do something real stupid to get back on top the gossip pile.
A year a a half to go (tops) 27 club, ya’ll!
Lord. Her eyes are more glazed than a Krispy Kreme donut. The whole family is a wreck.
Dear Lilo,
For your b-day I got you a few little trinkets you could use, here is something called self respect, one year in rehab, and new parents.
Happy Birthday!
why the avalance of fur coats all of a sudden? is there some wardrobe assistant currently being rushed off her feet trying to figure out why some hangers are lying on the floor forlornly?
also, why is it that seemingly almost every newspiece about Lindsay Lohan needs to have that line “even though the table is covered in booze, she doesn’t seem to be drinking them” or “even though the whole premise is dripping with booze, she’s only drinking water” or “even though you can get drunk just by inhaling the air of the club, she’s certifiably sober, eyewitness says”
why? it’s kinda like all those pitiable dissembling we’re seeing in the other threads these past few days. you know, the one’s that start with “i’m not a fan of/a member of/a follower of/a hater of… ladeedaa”
Hohan doesn’t have “friends”, she has unemployed hangers-on.
I dare y’all to google “Sparkle Johnson” and tell me that aint gonna be Lindsay at age 40…or next week! G’head run to google, I’ll wait!
I tend to think she’ll end up more like Casey Johnson than Sparkle Johnson.
or like Paz de la huerta…
I’m talking about looks tho! LOL
I wonder how much she pays her sources and witnessess to say she wasn’t drinking.
I know everyone is complaining about that, but I think that makes every article extra funny. She still thinks it makes a difference.
Of COURSE she wasn’t drinking! That’s water in that water bottle, y’all. Of COURSE she wasn’t doing drugs! That’s baby powder, y’all.
I’d like to say I’d be surprised if she makes it to 27, but, as I’ve said, she IS a crackroach.
The first picture is old. I remember seeing it awhile ago.
Looks like it’s Cracktini Monday. Pass the gin…
Vodka okay? I mean water! I meant water. 😉
“Baby Jane, don’t keep me hangin’ on the line; go your own way, don’t think twice about me; now you’re moving in high society…” ALWAYS goes through my head when I see that pink fur and matching lipstick.
Well, seeing as you are the master of the Cracktini, I leave the recipe to you! 🙂
Cracktinis all around, Ladies. Blohan’s made it to 26. Should be a fun year! 😀
Lindsay won’t be joining the 27th club. Just like the mighty cockroach and Courtney Love, she’ll out live us all.
So she’ll live to 50?
Since you brought out the great Courtney, I will say this. I seriously believe Courtney Love is on her way out. You just take one look at her in the present and you can see the abuse her body has endured from pharmaceuticals. Courtney goes through periods of lucidity and then she descends back into craziness each time it gets a little worse than the last. But those pharmaceuticals are always around. Courtney Love is like Michael Jackson in her drug use these days. She gave up the street drugs a long time ago. The thing with MJ was that he was very reclusive. Courtney is not. This isn’t also a Keith Richards thing or Motorhead Lenny situation where they go through long periods of sobriety. It is continuous drug use whether street drugs or pharmaceuticals. I think the question with Courtney is whether she is taking them at therapeutic levels or abusing them.
My point is, even if Lindsay is a cockroch eventually all the abuse her body has endured is going to take on other forms. Honestly, I looked at pics from LL’s bday and as I’ve said previously I think she has heroin eyes now. I think we’ve run from crack straight into intravenous injections of heroin. She’s in bad shape.
you know if we didn’t know better we’d all refuse to believe that she’s only 26…
Has Lindsay HERSELF seen this top picture????
Jesus Joseph!!! If I looked like that I’d be bouncing back to rehab!!!
bwahahaha good uestion erika! I wonder if lindsay has seen that photo!!! can you imagine how embarassing that would be ? i’m so happy that photo exists.
STOP saying she looks 40!!!!!!!!!!!
I am 40 yrs old and i look nothing like that! People mistake me for late 20s!
Do you realize Jlo, jennifer garner, eva longoria are ALL 40 and UP??? and it’s not because they’re movie stars!
Seriously, it’s really an insult because truthfully Lilo doesn’t even look 90…she looks like the demon possessed!
and it’s not because she looks FOURTY it’s bad drugs, bad liquor, bad smokes, bad parents, bad tanning, bad extensions, bad STDs, bad choices, bad dye jobs….
Totally with you on this. Lindsay doesn’t look any particular age to me; she looks like a zombie. Completely unhealthy and totally off. Nothing like a normal 40-year old human.
thanks Doll!
If I can get one gal on here to ration with me I feel all the better! Cheers
I know that header photo is to be celebrated for its bustedness, but it. HURTS. You’re in trouble when Gollum starts to eclipse you in “Who Wore it Better?” – FACE EDITION.
Omg that lead photo is beyond offensive to the eyes. She looks like an old, Eastern European hooker. No offense to Eastern European hookers!
does anyone else find that her nose looks like a penis these days?
For everyone who insisted Lindz was wearing “face prosthetics” to look like Older Liz in the pictures from the other day, you should really check out the Daily Mail’s pics of her dressed up as Cleopatra, filmed when Liz was YOUNG. Lindsay is still bloated and looks like a pile of crap. And wasn’t the movie to be finished by now? Hmmmm.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2167954/Lindsay-Lohan-wears-ebony-wig-emulate-Liz-Taylors-Cleopatra-role–puffing-cigarette.html
oh wow I didn’t realize Cleopatra wore heels. Granted I never saw Dame Taylor’s movie but my mom is sure Dame Elizabeth didn’t wear heels in her movie.
She looks like a (slightly) younger version of Donatella Versace. Can you imagine when she hits 40? Yikes!