I remember a time, not that long ago, when it seemed like every time we wrote about Lindsay Lohan, she was somehow connected to the phrase “cracked-out jewel heist”. The Cracken has a long history as a jewel thief, long before she was even charged with stealing jewelry in an LA boutique… when was that? Last year? Lindsay has been crack–heisting sh-t for YEARS. So it’s almost pleasurable for me to see Lindsay going back to her crack-roots. According to multiple outlets, Lindsay was questioned by the cops following an all-night party in the Hollywood Hills – a party in which some items of jewelry went “missing”. Cough.
Lindsay Lohan was interviewed by police today regarding an apparent burglary at a Hollywood Hills home last night — but Lindsay insists … she had nothing to do with it.
According to sources, Lindsay slept over at the home in question Sunday night after a small get together — along with several guests — and when everyone woke up this morning, the owner of the home claimed expensive jewelry had been stolen from the property.
Law enforcement sources tell us, police were called to the home and interviewed everyone inside, including LIndsay.
We’re told Lindsay was very cooperative — but claimed she had nothing to do with any missing jewelry.
As of now, Lindsay is NOT considered a suspect. The investigation is ongoing.
Radar and X17 say that Lindsay’s assistant Gavin Doyle also spent the night, and Gavin was also questioned by the police. You know what? I’m sort of amazed by all of the components of this story. Let’s break it down, shall we?
*So, you invite Lindsay Lohan to your houseparty, or she crashes it. As soon as you realize Lindsay is on site, wouldn’t your first reaction be to hide all of the valuables, all of the liquor and all of the drugs? And why would you invite her to SPEND THE NIGHT?
*Even then, Lindsay is still going to find all of your valuables and she’s going to try to crack-heist them in some way. While I admire the ballsy move of calling the cops and not letting people leave, if you’re not going to come out and accuse (J’Accuse!!) the Cracken, it all becomes a theater of the (crackie) absurd.
*So, obviously, the Cracken stole your jewelry. Why do you think she would have any qualms about lying to the police in a standard issue interview? Unless you’re going to strip search her – and I mean putting on the gloves and checking for the jewelry IN her crack muffin – the whole exercise is pointless.
*While you’re gloved up, you should really check Gavin’s drawers too. The Cracken loves working with a partner on her jewel heists.
Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame and PCN.
Woman of Walmart
In her crack muffin? Lol!
No one has mentioned that her brother, Cody, was there too. Good influence!
And who stays the night and wakes up at noon the next day in someone’s home you don’t know???? Oh, Lindsay Trashcan!
Cody is 16, by the way! Wow!
I think Cody is the younger sibling that one of her johns is waiting for to reach legal age (so he can have his way with Cody) from that BI.
Bella – WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?! That’s sick if it’s true. Holy hell that family is all kinds of messed up. Do you happen to have a link to that BI?
littlestar – I’ve been scouring the blinds on CDAN and BG AND d-listed for about the last 3 hours, but I cannot find it. (DAMMIT!)
Here’s the gist of it: A troubled former child actress with under-age sibling(s) has been supported by a wealthy “benefactor” who has made it clear to both the former child actress AND her mother that he wants a package deal. He’s just waiting until the younger sibling turns 18.
Lots of guesses were for Blohan/Vikram/WO/Ali, but Ali’s turned 18 already, so I guessed Cody as the under-age sib. (This BI hasn’t been revealed yet, to my knowledge.)
@Bella
What??!!!!! That is possibly the sickest thing I have ever heard. Disgusting. Poor Cody!! I’d write “Run, Cody, ruuuuun!”, but you know by the time they reach 18 everybody in that family has lost the ability to rebel to such depravations and just kind of let go and wait for the end to come.
My hope in Ali is really frail too, and I always thought she was the best bet in that bunch.
I can’t with this family, I just… Ugh.
Thanks Bella! And wow, just wow… I cannot believe how f’ed up this family is. Well, I can, but for Cody’s sake, who up until now hasn’t really been included in the Cracken’s mess, it is just really sad and scary.
Seriously, I hide my jewelry and drugs when I’m just reading about her.
Ha!
I saw this on the TV Screen when I was running on the treadmill this morning and I bust out laughing, miss stepped my footing and almost fell. My husband thought they were doing “Lindsay’s Best Crack Heists Countdown” not that there was NEW crack thievery.
Glad you didn’t fall. : – )
She is the very last person I would ever invite to a party, seriously!
+1
+2!!!
LMAO, seriously Kaiser?! If I didn’t feel that this was a gossip blog that actually bothers to crack, ummm, fact check…I would think you were making this up, lol.
I remember back when I actually used to root for the Cracken. Ha! BTW, she needs to start refreshing the crack-stensions hanging out of her crack-head more often. They look awful, as does the trout pout.
Inviting Crackie to your home when its chock full of expensive jewelry? Haaahaaahaaaaa!
It’s only 11:30 a.m. here. But I think it’s DEFINITELY time to break out the Cracktinis.
Anyone else care to join me?
*whips out martini pitcher, vodka, vermouth and a wee pinch of crack rock…stirs evil brew*
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHA
Of course nothing will happen
just wait a couple of weeks. she is stupid enough to be photographed with the missing jewelery.
than it will be magically returned to the police station by her assistent.
lohan clan will end up bashing the person she has stolen from.
they will say the person didnt have the decency to come over and demand it back.
the person will sue, lohans will counter-sue and her high class attorney will get her out due to technialities and lohan will have one more reason to think the world is soooo infair and everybody is just out to get her.
kaiser might as well just write the story now cauz we all know its gonna end up like that.
Wow, such a perfect summary of things to come… I applaud you and your effort to spare me some time checking back for LL stories on CB in the next weeks 😀
Oh, alright, who am I kiddin’, I’ll check back anyways…
Just like that Rolex (or whatever brand) watch she stole from someone.
Or the clothing she stole from someone else.
Or the fur she stole from another someone else.
Or the necklace she stole from that store.
Or the…well, you get the idea.
You skipped the part where she claims she thought they were giving it to her and it was all just a big misunderstanding.
Is anybody truly surprised. It’s just another day in the life of this chick. OMG!!! THOSE LIPS!!!! UGH!!!!
What I want to know is how does she look in the mirror and think “my lips look great”? The overinflated lips make her look like the Joker especially when she wears red lipstick. I know she is delusional but her lips are beyond ridiculous. I wonder if they are implants or if she keeps getting injections.
About the theft… I don’t feel too bad for the victim of the thievery. You know what you’re getting into when you hang out with LL. Drama, booze, drugs, and thievery… Rinse and repeat over and over.
I just showed my husband the pic of her in the car and he said,”Good god! She looks like the Joker!” LOL!! Her make-up looks like it’s melting off in her hot smelling cig mobile!
I cracked up when I read your post. You are 100% correct. She must be using a fun house mirror.
I agree regarding not feeling bad for the person who got their stuff stolen, because when you invite Lindsay over, it seems ‘anything goes’.
LOL Yes! The lips are hideous. She must be so high she can’t see herself properly in the mirror. She couldn’t look more repulsive.
I’ll give them a pass on letting her stay over if it was to say,prevent DUI (impossible, she would never!)…but lock up your valuables people, damn!
They should send her home in a taxi.
I would call the garbage disposal.
Maren – HazMat Disposal Unit and the CDC.
Same “crack” time, same “crack” channel. Nothing new here.
Hopefully she wasn’t in the crackmobile.
HAHAHAHAH
Faces of Death. Part Lohan.
that’s wicked funny
OMG.
You can’t be serious.
Doesn’t Lohan know that till the day she dies… she will always be the suspect, for any missing valuables… when they go missing in her presences.
But she is still doing the five finger discount in homes that she is a guest.
And I agree. Unless they do a cavity search. The police will never find any stolen jewelry on her.
She learned the last time. It can’t be boosted and wore out of the location in plain site.
Lohan has learned to stash it in the one place, that no man willingly will want to take a peek at.
I to thought & almost dry reached @ the thought of her hiding spot! This girl takes the cake.
This stupid tw-t has never learned a damn thing once in her miserable, pathetic life.
Of course she “had nothing to do with it”. Hope they have surveillance tape.
awww—hollywood.
just a small get together with your closest fellows and they end up robbing the shit out of you.
nothing like having friends in l.a.
Who would even want this chick in their home, much less invite her to a party?
Her lips and eyebrows scare me
Her assistant was the one who covered up something with a bag when she had her accident…you’re right, I wouldn’t trust his ass either.
No, that was a bodyguard. When te cops interviewed LiLo, she said he was driving & he called BS. I’m surprised that he still even works for her if he’s a truth-teller. (and shouldn’t she have been charged with making a false report?)
I’m just wondering what anyone would possibly need their assistant with them 24/7 for. Isn’t doing stuff like not paying bills, issuing deluded statements to the tabs, and shoplifting a day job? Why would he need to party & spend the night with her? Shouldn’t his job be to makes sure she leaves immediately after all the coke is gone?
They’re gonna have to burn whatever she crack-napped on.
Kind of like inviting the Fox into the chicken house for a all nighter then calling the police in the morning when the eggs come up missing and the fox still snoozing on the couch with yolk dried on her face….
sticky fingas–LOL
she just can’t help herself, telling herself “they are insured anyway”
I wonder will this go away or will they get to the bottom of this.
I KNOW I couldn’t sleep if she were in my house, nahhh, I’d have to drive he home myself.
she is soooo suspect, ALL the time, smh.
I can guarantee there was no sleeping at this sleep over. That girl is a coke head. They were up all night doing blow. Just saying.
She’s become a bona fide jewel thief! She’s almost like Catwoman if Catwoman weren’t…a trainwreck. (Though in the new comics they do portray her as a self destructive villain with a self-loathing problem who doinks Batman on the regular. Still though.)
She may steal shiny things like Catwoman, but in those photos she looks like The Joker.
I’d say she has the Penguin’s build, and Killer Croc’s skin.
Ewww, I wouldn’t let this chick within 100 feet of my home, much less INSIDE, sitting on my chairs, using any of my washroom etc. I feel dirty now.
P.s I lol’d pretty hard at “crack muffin”
years ago when I was still smoking weed I had a birthday bash, some of the people invited were frequent coke users.
I ended up missing things.
Some weed (okay, f***ing addicts) but also an eyebrow tweezer, a harmonica and toothpaste.
I mean, SERIOUSLY???
grifters, they just take, take, take. no matter what. they cant help themselves.
dispicable. no sense of personal value.
I don’t know why, but your comment made me laugh out loud because of the random stuff they took.
I was thinking the same thing Faye, she thinks she’s Catwoman!
Of course she stole it. Who else would have done it?
Oh she is a beauty. Did they check under her upper lip or under her low hanging knockers? Perfect hiding places.
So that’s why she can’t ever close her mouth! The loot’s in there!
“…Lindsay slept over at the home in question Sunday night after a small get together — along with several guests”
Translation for those who don’t speak Cracken:
“Lindsay was at an all-night, drug fueled orgie”
Ha ha ha, EXACTLY!!!!!
Please, lord, let this crack-diot try and fence that jewelry. I’m sure it’s valuable enough to be a felony, and I’m also sure she’s stupid enough to think she’ll get away with it.
If the owner claims insurance–even better. Insurance company investigators are RUTHLESS–much more ruthless than cops in property crimes.
On another note, somewhere a tail-less horse is looking at these pics and crying out that the LEAST the Cracken could do is condition & comb those extensions! Yuck!
If you’re going to perpetuate an insurance scam, wouldn’t you invite LiLo to your home? She’s instantly the first, last and only suspect.
i would invite her to my party any day! u get her high and just play with her. make her look like the c**t that she is. would be faboosh.
If I’m ever at the same party as her (haha), I’m gonna steal EVERYTHING. It’s the perfect crime.
In the first picture she forgot her pants again, in the others she just looks greasy and nasty. And you know that anything would be fair game for this crack magpie. Drugs, jewelry, cars, men, it’s all the same to her. And anyone dumb enough to allow her in their home should only be surprised if theft had not occurred.
Hahahahahahaha ahh linzeeeeeee! This girl is either dubious & does not give a fock .Or she’s the unluckiest girl in the world & like another poster said always getting set up… She’s like a walking Dickens novel….
I think it’s less the color of her skin and more the content of her crack-addled character.
why is she trying to look like a meemaw in miami beach? her boobs are already down to her elbows; now she just needs to start wearing meemaw clothes: a nylon jogging suit, a visor, a bedazzled straw hat…oh, wait.
She should hock it all to pay for a dermatologist. Seriously, her skin is ick.
J’accuse!!!!
Is this whole “slumber party” thing something that’s new? Do Hollywoodies always hunker down with randoms in their homes? Or is this just some sort of slang for what is nostalgically known as an orgy?
Drug- & alcohol-fueled orgy, Boo. 😉
Oh, oh, yes. That **was** kinda stupid of me! 🙂
.
Let’s play “I Spy”…
In pic 1: Is that Gerard Butler off to the right behind her head? All right, I know it’s not — GB never plasters his hair down like that. But that’s a face he makes quite often, and it just struck me as funny. Especially since he is said to have partaken (yuck!) of her at least once.
In pic 2: I *love* that the person next to her is holding up a big bag, as in, “Please don’t let me be caught sitting next to the Cracken. Not in pics. They last forever!”
The guy behind the Cracken in photo #1 is the infamous Pootie, Lohan’s previous partner in crime.
Folks, never take your eyes off the hooker you brought home for entertainment last night…she might steal your valuables while you’re snoozing it off…
I read once the difference between a cocaine addict and a meth addict was that a cocaine addict would rob your stuff but a meth addict would rob your stuff and then help you look for it.
I wonder which Lindsay did?
The obvious reason she was asked back to a houseparty was the drugs. They dont mind sharing stuff like that but they’ll still rob you afterwards to make up for it.
This is the sort of reporting that annoys me. Why was this article necessary? She has not been accused of anything yet this write up is showing her in a negative light. She has been good recently. Let’s give her some room to get her shit together.
Not gonna happen, sweetie. She’s had plenty of time/room/rehab/opportunities to “get her shit together” and she squanders them, choosing to stay in the gutter instead.
Also, this is a gossip blog (the BEST one!), not CNN.com.
She has had YEARS to get her sh*t together. And, as the original Bella says, go read CNN if you want serious news-or a facsimile thereof…
May, while we are very happy that you still have f–ks to give, we do not.
We are here to point and laugh, feel free to grab a cracktini and drop your delusions that the Cracken would ever even harbor the very horrid thought of actually giving a crap about herself, her life or anyone she comes into contact with.
Her rap sheet should convince anyone with half a brain cell how Lohan feels about anything. Besides coke, that is…
When she stole before wasn’t she dumb enough to wear the necklace in public and then she was papped? Maybe that will happen!
Seems like she wore a watch and a coat that she was accused of taking and was also photographed wearing both these items. Not too bright but then again nobody ever holds her accountable.
Hide yo jewels, hide yo drugs, hide yo car ’cause Lindsey’s here.
It was probably less invite-her-to-sleepover and more she-passed-in-a-closet sort of thing.
Not to be outcracked, Amanda Bynes was in another car accident (TMZ).
Well played, Amanda…steal Lohan’s thunder (pun intended)!
Those two need to be locked in an arena and forced to play Demolition Derby to the death.
Come on LAPD, make the streets safer for EVERYONE and MAKE THIS HAPPEN!
This is an amazing idea.
lizzi – Proceeds from the ticket sales could go towards restitution for their victims.
These pictures make me forget this is a 26 year old woman we’re talking about.
Cracken could star in a remake of the video for Jane’s Addictions “Been Caught Stealin”
Doesn’t it get tiring to be her? I mean, I’m approaching this from the point of view of a non user of anything, but doesn’t it just get exhausting? It’s probably got to be either terrifying or exhilarating to steal, depending on your issues, but the lying to cover it all up all the time? Ick. Just ick.
The dog ate it.. I know, the victims don’t have a dog.. and if they did.. he couldn’t heist all that jewelry from the secret hiding place.. so she imagines they are falsely accusing her, tempted her here for a party.. to take the fall.. now saying it’s stolen.. then they get insurance money.. sell the loot they took.. or it’s already been sold or given to a collector to pay off a bill they owed.. you know; it’s so crazy-whack the oddly naive people she manages to hang around with, deals just fine with their peculiarities, but still.. there is suspect all around of what happens .. that anyone allows her in their home..
Damn all these users for latching onto Blohan and using her for fame and money! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (I’m sorry, I really tried to keep a straight face there.)
“crackmuffin!!” As soon as I finish wiping the tears of laughter from my eyes, I’ll start making the cracktinis.
Sign me up, Iz. I had less than four hours of sleep last night, so I may as well resign myself to this day as a loss. 😉
I only ever really read CB or DListed for the blogs, of course! You guys are miles above the rest! However, here is what MichaelK/DListed had to say about where the missing jewelry was likely to be stashed: “(…I already know it was LiLo and she used her sticky vagina to snatch that jooree!)” What a hoot! Seems everyone has her number, which is crack-zero.
Cheers ladies! Bottoms up.
Oooh! Now it’s getting good! There’s reports that Linds brought two men to the party and those are the men who did the robbery. This is SUCH text book crack ho-ery! Probably her dealers or pimps making sure they get paid!
I know her family is not capable, but someone needs to do an intervention. I don’t hate her, but I do hate how she’s acting out.
WHAT A LOSER, SOUNDS LIKE A SET UP !! WITH LINDSEY AS THE LEADER !! FUNNY HOW THINGS GO MISSING WHEN EVER SHE’S AROUND, JEWELRY, CLOTHES, WHAT’S NEXT A BANK HEIST !!
Kaiser: THANK YOU! Your posts on Lohan and Diva Mariah Carey are SO FUNNY! They really make me laugh out loud and there are same days when my co-workers are very glad you made my laugh out loud because then I am less cranky with them!! ha ha
Looks like the entire grifter Gang Lindsay included have ran….Go the hell out of Dodge…Dina and 12 bags and a surf board and hopefully the 16 yrs who was allowed to go to a coke orgy with his big sister..are headed for NYC and Lindsay following right behind…Looks like Dina cleared out the Hollywood Hills house and has decamped….and I will bet you Lindsay has suddenly discovered a job that will take her out of the country in a hurry…Watch and see…They are Running ahead of the law……
Where Blohan will be photographed wearing at least one piece of the stolen goods.
Is this the blind you were talking about earlier!?
The price took awhile to agree on. At first our C list actress who used to be almost an A list movie actress was just paid by the night. That got to be too burdensome though because she always needed money but didn’t always have the time to spend the night or do what he wanted for the money. He wants a lot of things. So, they went from $25,000 a night to a flat $2M. Sure there are some other perks she gets too, but she likes to keep it all quiet and pretend she is actually earning the money through side ventures. She isn’t. He keeps those propped up for her too, but writes it off on his taxes. The guy has a vivid imagination and our actress has been photographed and taped in so many compromising positions and with such a combination of people that she could literally start her own adult DVD collection. Our actress is allowed to sleep with and be with whoever she wants but so is her benefactor. In fact he tapes those too and makes our actress watch and talk to him while she is watching. He pays for her cell phone so is aware of everyone she speaks to and texts. Her cell phone bills sometimes reach $50,000 a month and he pays. That is in addition to the $2M a year. She racks up so much in charges because she calls all over the world and tries to spend as much as she can. When she buys clothes she uses his credit card. She has no money. It has all gone to other things. Her salaries for her upcoming projects have all been signed over. He is her lifeline. She does whatever he wants. He is counting down the days for what he really wants. A family member of our actress. He wants both of them and has made it very clear he will pay whatever it takes. He just wants to make sure the family member is legal first although that has not stopped him from inviting her on vacations and watching her undress. The family member is ready for it and knows it is coming. In fact, she is looking to take the place of our actress and has been dropping hints to the benefactor about just that.
Read more at ONTD: http://ohnotheydidnt.livejournal.com/70311504.html#ixzz24Pl0A14d
Well, if there’s anything to these new allegations, it will be priceless if she’s summoned back to LA to face the charges.
There’s nothing more entertaining than watching Lohan squirm in a courtroom.
It’s being reported that Lindsay took her 16 year old brother, Cody to the 2 day party. A 16 year old to an overnight drinking party??? Again, where is Dina? Why is she letting him even hang out with Lindsay? Guess we’re in for another screwed up Lohan. Some things never change.
She’ll probably try to get some lackey to fence it for her – crack money must be running low. She’s SUCH a mess, absolutely nothing surprises me about her anymore.
When I first read this I said to myself “Don’t jump to any conclusions. Thefts happen in the world that are not done by Lindsay Lohan.” I admired my open-mindedness for about 13 seconds until I realised the absolute certainty that there would be some kind of shady business connecting her to this. Sure enough,she has some shady connection. According to TMZ this was some fairly swanky mansion where the party was held so I’m not sure how the usual “He/she is just trying to make money off of Lindsay” line will go. I’m sure these morons figured if a person was taken enough by the idea of hanging with a celeb and letting her and some friends stay over, they’d be way too starrry-eyed to think about checking their valuables. Guess not. Crazy doesn’t mean stupid.
glad you came to your senses. good point about the swanky digs. not quite the same as some truck driver who hit Lindsay backwards on the road just to ‘make money’ off her. She is & will always be addicted to drama which fuels her drug addiction which feeds her thievery that gives her the rush to want the drugs-drama queen
Those lips… those extensions… that saggy skin…
Why can’t she steal a bra?
because in her mind she passes the pencil test
“Spent the night” is code for stayed up all night blowing rails and drinking…
Lohan Inc has already kicked into defence mode, deflecting the blame onto the homeowner for letting the men into his house with Lindsay….Duh , you counting on screwing Lindsay for the party you don’t insult her at the door by denying her friends entrance into the house….and this is the same house and guy/owner she was partying with last month when the cops shut them down at 700 am for noise infractions….Lindsay and Paris and Nasty Bear Brandon and the other Coke heads of Hollywood Hills …
and she took her brother there…What a loving sister pimping out her 16 yr old brother….
Cody your sister has such high hopes for you don’t ya know. She cares about you & your well being enough to take you with her into her dark den of debauchery. How sad another victim of Dina who doesn’t see a problem with her daughters lifestyle enough to allow her under aged son to run wild with his cool big Sis who just made a flick with a porn star. So so sad.
Axl Rose is looking rough in these pics…
seriously, WTF? WHY DOES she GET AWAY with S***T all the time??? and I’m here in ‘ooops! sorry sweety, stroke of bad luck AGAIN!’
i don’t even want to go into MY problems…
why? how? does she get away with this s***T?
sounds crass but I hope she gets a smacking of a life ending for all the seriously messed up, wreaked out bad crackie-karma she’s accummulated througout life.
and if you’re DUMB enough to be FRIENDS with HOLO? you deserve to have your house robbed from right under your feet.
sorry