Penelope Cruz: “A woman who doesn’t want children can be happy w/out” them

Penelope Cruz

Here’s some photos of Penelope Cruz at the San Sebastian film festival photocall for Venuto al Mondo. She wore both a dress and a cardigan pantset (shown belowl) by L’Wren Scott and paired black Ferragamo pumps with each of the outfits. The dress, which is far too feminine for my own tastes with all of that mauve floral print, looked spectacular on Penelope. Other than the fact that she can pull off nearly any outfit, I mostly envy her gorgeous hair. Bitch has perfect highlights.

Penelope Cruz

In Venuto al Mondo, Penelope plays an Italian woman (really?), Gemma, who is unable to bear children. In an interview with the Guardian, she says her own experience in becoming a mother at age 37 helped prepare her for Gemma’s experiences. Penelope was also still nursing her and sexy beast Javier Bardem’s son, Leo, while she shot this movie, which made the situation quite interesting when her character held newborn babies. Here are some excerpts:

Penelope Cruz

On her character “I think this movie is homage to all women, a homage to motherhood. It’s a homage to that relationship of mother and child. A woman that doesn’t want children obviously can be happy without children. But one that wants to have children that much … it’s very difficult for her to be happy. Of course I understood all that before I became a mother. But after you give birth you understand in a much deeper way what Gemma was missing.”

Interacting with set babies while she was still nursing: “Some of these babies were only a week old. And so they were smelling me and that made them want to eat. But I was playing a woman who couldn’t feed because she hadn’t given birth! That created a very strange but alive dynamic between me and those babies. You cannot learn something like that. And this film is full of moments that could not be planned.”

On life as a working mother: “More and more I try to be more picky with my selection. I am now able to choose the work I do, which I don’t take for granted.”

[From Guardian]

It’s nice to hear a Hollywood mom acknowledge that not every woman lives to be a mother. I certainly cannot identify with the Jennifer Garner school of thought that dictates there is “no deeper want for a woman than to be a mother.” Even though I do have a child, I honestly never planned to become a parent (it was one of those “happy accidents”), and I don’t understand the yearning to have more children. Things are just fine for me with one child, and she is my world, but I suspect I’d have been just fine without having a kid too. Don’t tell my daughter I said that though!

Back to the Penelope’s fashion — I really dig this black-and-white cardigan with these cropped black pants, and this look is even better than the dress. She’s so beautiful. Javier is a very lucky man!

Penelope Cruz

Penelope Cruz

Photos courtesy of WENN

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56 Responses to “Penelope Cruz: “A woman who doesn’t want children can be happy w/out” them”

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  1. T.C. says:

    What a treasure: a Beautiful actress without foot in mouth disease. Someone who talks like a real person knowing not all women are the same. Javier Bardem is lucky.

    • Zimmer says:

      Agreed. She makes very wise comments. I admire her intelligence, a seemingly rare occurance in Hollywood.

  2. Debra says:

    Perfection.

  3. ANGELIC 20 says:

    i think she is one of the most beautiful women of her generation in Hollywood . i agree there are some women that can carry off anything and she is one of them ,i usually never look past her face as she always look so radiant and beautiful that i really don’t care what she is wearing and i think she have a very warm and welcoming smile.

    • Liv says:

      +1

      She’s gorgeous! If I could look like her with 37, I’d be pretty happy 😉

      • Bubbling says:

        yes, yes… I remember being little girl and seeing her for the first time in a movie, I thought she was the prettiest thing I had ever seen…and bitch does have great and thick hair, even post baby (many women experience shedding right after giving birth)

    • Raven says:

      I’ve long had a theory that women in their mid-30’s look their best. Cruz is a really good example. She just gets better looking.

  4. Birdie says:

    If you were my mother that statement would hurt me.
    Anyway, Penelope is such a talented, classy lady, I never really cared for her, but now I kinda love her.

    • gillociraptor says:

      I totally get what you’re saying, but I also think that when kids get older, they can handle hearing this stuff. My mom was desperate for a kid for years, then realized that she had other dreams she could more easily fulfill without being encumbered by a baby. She took a new job and got accepted into a graduate program she really wanted and that would have gotten her work that would have kept her financially secure for the rest of her life. And then she found out she was pregnant with me. And, I think, knowing I wasn’t what my mother had planned but that she cared enough to have me anyway is just as powerful as having a parent who desperately wanted a child. My mom is my best friend, and I love that she’s honest with me about everything. It makes me feel less strange about putting my own career before having children.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        Really? It wouldn’t hurt me at all.
        It’s basically saying that she was a fully-formed, satisfied human being before she had a child. Having a child just ADDED to that, and made life more interesting but it doesn’t DEFINE who she is.
        At least that’s my take on it.

        Personally, I know my parents love me deeply, but I also know that they had lives and dreams before I was born and that they would have continued happily with their lives had I (and my bro) NOT been born. I don’t take offense to that all. I’d rather not be the sole reason for my parents’ happiness you know? Too much pressure! 😉

      • littlestar says:

        I love your comment, Kitten. It reminds me of a conversation I had with my mother when I was in my very early 20s. She told me that she had kids (there are four of us) because growing up that was what was expected of her, and that’s what “women” do – get married and have babies. She said that as she became older, she realized how wrong this was and that her reasons for having kids completely changed. It didn’t upset me in the least, in fact, it made me see my mom in a different light: She is her OWN person, she is not defined soley by having children, and the choices she makes are for herself. She was basically telling me, have kids because you want to, not because you HAVE to as a woman.

        P.S. I’m 28 and have no desire to have a child. I love my life the way it is!!! 😀

  5. Marta says:

    love her

  6. Julie says:

    Maybe I’m just in a bitchy mood this morning but I still can’t look at her and NOT see Tom Cruise. Either it was a fake relationship or she actually loved the guy. Whichever way you slice it I don’t care about her or anything she says or does. Tainted all the way around.

    • effy says:

      Wow! you must be perfect with a perfect past.
      what a perfect ‘world’ you live in.

    • Birdie says:

      With me it is the complete opposite. I tend to forget that she was with him. Btw, I just recently discovered that they were together for several years, I thought it was only a few months.

    • Liv says:

      When they were together for a few months they probably saw each other only a few times. I think Tom Cruise can be very charming and he was a bit more secretive about his inner craziness back then. So I just think she figured out that he’s nuts and dumped him – please don’t tell me he dumped her 😉

    • zenb!tch says:

      I see her as the one who had enough self-esteem to escape. He has a pattern of trying to corrupt Catholic girls and she said no.

    • Lizziebeans says:

      I love when people ‘blah blah blah’ about how they don’t care about certain celebs, what she says, does etc…yet you take the time to post and comment about her… Seems kind of “duh”

  7. Tifygodess24 says:

    I’m glad she said this , so many women feel pressured to have children because we are brought up to think that’s what women do and you’re less of one if you choose not to have them. We put so much emphasis on women and their womb and “time clock” it’s crazy. Yes women can be happy with or without children in their lives. How often do you hear someone say to a man, “oh boy you’re hitting about 35 better get a bun in the oven!” Or “what you don’t have kids? Is everything ok down there??” lol

    • EmmaStoneWannabe says:

      Yes! Especially if you live in the deep south…super conservative about family life down here…If you’re still single at 25, or have no kids by 35, ppl generally freak out a little lol. Like wtf is wrong with you, you crazy liberal? It’s condescending and insane.

      • iseepinkelefants says:

        OMG THIS! I live in Texas ya’ll. Big city though and I’m always surprised by people who are surprised that I’m 26, not married and do not want children. They freak out. And when I tell them I don’t even have a boyfriend they’re like “you better get on that you don’t want to be an old maid”. I’m like WTF? First off you insult my ass. Then you make me insecure when normally I’m happy with how my life is? It’s messed up. I’m starting to realize it’s not me, it’s the South.

        Not to say I don’t want to get married (duh) but I guess I’m really confused by people who think 30’s is too old ya know? For society’s sake I hope I’m married when I’m 30 because the looks I get now make me despair for what they’ll say when I’m 33 and still unmarried. People are such assh0les.

    • littlestar says:

      Tifygoddess, YES! See my comment above in response to the Original Kitten.

      It really ticks me off that women who don’t want kids are seen as pariahs or deficient somehow, or like there is something mentally and physically wrong with us. I have no desire to have kids. I don’t think I’m less of a woman because of this. I also hate it when people say, oh you’ll change your mind just wait and see. F off I’ll change my mind lol.

    • zenb!tch says:

      I live in the more “Hollywood” part of LA where no one really cares. I’m also part Hispanic and sometimes hit the markets in the Hispanic areas with my mom. I’m 43 and childless (by choice) but I’ve gotten the same depressed and then weirded out looks from (immigrant) Hispanic women ever since I looked like an adult when they asked about my kids. No I don’t have kids… I’m in college. No I don’t want kids. I swear they worship children. I find them as weird as they find me.

  8. marie says:

    she is gorgeous.

  9. Nancy Kaye says:

    Like Giadia, the author writes that she accidentally got pregnant and really did not want to have kids. Those sentiments are fine to have, but when your child reads this (and believe me, she will at some point in time), she will feel very hurt and rejected. Not a good thing to publish these thoughts; better to keep them to yourself.

    • TheOriginalKitten says:

      I don’t get why people are trying to shame Bedhead for being honest about her feelings re: motherhood? First of all, who’s to say her child will EVER read this?

      Secondly, she said she loves her child and her child is “her world”-or did you just gloss over that part?
      Saying that she “suspects” her life would have been fine without a kid is NOT an insult guys.

      So much judgement…smh…

    • littlestar says:

      Oh puhleeze! Bedhead was just being honest with herself and her readers. If your kids reacts negatively to such a revelation, it’s probably because you didn’t do a very good job in raising them (so tired of all these coddles, indulged, spoiled kids nowadays who think the world revolves around them). My youngest brother is my parents fourth and last child. He was a complete “accident”. It’s not a secret, everyone knows he wasn’t planned. Doesn’t mean he isn’t crazy loved by them and me and the rest of my siblings. And he knows he was an “accident”, we all joke about it, and guess what? Doesn’t bother him at all. He’s a normal young man who realizes not everything works out perfectly. My parents alway say he was the best accident that ever happened to them, or as my aunt puts it more elegantly, their “miracle baby”.

      • TQB says:

        Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans. Heck, I’m going to tell my kid that not only did I not plan to have kids, I didn’t plan to get married. Doesn’t mean he and the Mr. aren’t the 2 most important things in the world to me.

    • videli says:

      Or, on the contrary, Bedhead’s daughter is not going to give a damn about the precise circumstances of her conception. She might even say, mom did not want a child, but then she decided to keep me (as far as I know, the keeping part never happens by accident), and then she put about two decades into raising and protecting me. And that’s enough to be asked from a woman.

    • RuddyZooKeeper says:

      Yes, certainly better to keep honest thoughts inside so out children never get to know us as individuals. So one day, after you’ve kept it all in for years and years, and your five kids are irritating the hell out of you at the dinner table, you’ll burst out with, “Why did I ever have kids?!” And then you’ll go back to holding it all in. My point? I really wish my mom had shared herself with me instead of holding this crap in.

  10. aims says:

    i think everyone has the right to make decisions in there lives, about kids. some want kids, others don’t. it’s not anything to be ashamed of. i wanted kids, always had, doesn’t mean im better then kidless people. it’s about choice. we all have the right to live our life in the best way that fits us.

  11. Mara says:

    She have a very beautiful hair and her body is amazing .

  12. Meera says:

    She look could look Italian to me, I don’t see any issue with her playing an Italian woman. She speaks Italian and has been in Italian movies before too.

  13. Beatrix says:

    Penelope has played an Italian character before in an all-Italian language movie called Non Ti Muovere; (Don’t move)she was wonderful in it.I highly recommend it.

  14. Gia says:

    I admire a woman who flat out KNOWS she doesn’t want kids. I have friends the hum and ha over it ad say they do but are in their mid to late 30’s. told their husbands they wanted them when they married but are hardcore dragging their feet. What torture. I knew I wanted them (and now I have one and he is pretty amazing) but if I didn’t and had one anyways it would be horrible. A baby is a huge life change and stress inducer. If you don’t want one, by god, don’t have one!!!! I can’t stress that enough…

    • EmmaStoneWannabe says:

      +1 Only selfless people should have children.

      • Gia says:

        Absolutely. I can sum up parenthood with two words: self sacrifice.

      • Becky1 says:

        Only selfless people should have kids? Really? That’s setting the bar really high. How many people out there are/were truly selfless? The late Mother Theresa? I can’t think of anyone in my life that I would consider selfless.

    • Christina says:

      I agree. I think that unless you are 100% sure that you want a child, you should not have one. But often it’s the other way around – having children is just ‘what you do’ and so many people go into parenthood without thinking it through, even though it’s the biggest decision any of us is ever likely to make.

    • zenb!tch says:

      +1 this is why I’m single. I don’t want kids but most men do. I didn’t want to pull an Aniston on my husband. I may look into getting married to someone who is divorced and who’s kids are grown in a few years. I’m not maternal but I’m not selfish.

  15. mel says:

    My young daughter asked me the other day if she can be married and not have kids…which honestly, I can so see her not having children which is great with me. Our daughters are so lucky to live in a country where they have some power over whether or not they choose to have kids. How can that not be celebrated?! I didn’t have kids until later because I was not sure I wanted them. I’m glad I did because honestly my friends who chose not to have them and are now in their 50s really regret it. Which they shouldn’t but they do. Oh…and I love her!

    • Gia says:

      Your last comment. I’ve seen the same in my older family members. Their spouses have passed away relatively young (60+) and they yearn for adult children and family. It’s very sad, but I still don’t think that’s a reason to have them….for fear of loneliness.

  16. LeeLoo says:

    1)Her son is going to be gorgeous when he grows up. That was my ideal genetic combination right there.

    2) Once again, I really think that the biggest difference in women such as Penelope and Jen Garner is their confidence level and the stability in their marriage. You can tell a lot about the state of one’s marriage from their comments. While I can’t say I am a telepathic guru who knows what anyone else but myself thinks at all times, I tend to think Jen has convinced herself that her motherhood is most important because it allows her to turn a blind eye to Ben’s “other” activities. There are so many rumors of Ben being a bad boy when he isn’t with Jen. To me it seems like she is trying to spend more time convincing herself of what she said, not the public. I think it say more to do with her self-esteem and confidence when she makes such a closed-ended statement.

    Penelope on the other hand seems to be very happy and confident in her place in life and situation. She doesn’t strike me as the type who is worrying about Javier’s actions. Plus, he has been an attentive and doting father and husband. I think she has more room to empathize with others than Jen or someone like her does. She’s not busy trying to sweep her husband’s alleged actions under the rug.

    • EmmaStoneWannabe says:

      I thinks it’s hard to compare the two as mothers/wives..esp just going off of several comments and supposed activities of their husbands. We have no idea what either marriage, or real confidence level of each woman, is like behind scenes. For all we know, Penelope could just be a better actress than Jen. Either way, hope that both of them are happy.

      • LeeLoo says:

        I’m not trying to compare the two based on acting talent though. I’m trying to compare what their respective statements make me think about them as people. Like I said, I don’t pretend to know either actress on a personal level, only what I read in gossip blogs. But there does seem to be a correlation between which actress said what and the actions of their husbands. You rarely see Penelope and Javier making the rounds of American or British gossip (which imo are more ruthless than Spanish Hello! or the other mainland Europe gossip mags) and if you do they are seen very positively. Whereas Ben’s actions have been scrutinized in the media and he has been accused of not being faithful to Jen. Now I’m not saying these rumors are true but who has more incentive from a psychological standpoint to try and get everyone to forget about what their husband is doing and bring off the image of a happy family? Who is going to be more busy trying to sweep certain actions under the rug? This has less to do with talent and more to do with how each woman is portrayed in the media and what issues they may or may not have to cope with when no one is looking.

  17. Jill says:

    she’s pretty. I just can’t stand her voice or her accent for some reason. Most accents are sexy and beautiful but for some reason hers is whiny and harsh to me. IDK

  18. Emma says:

    I absolutely love this woman!! She’s stunning, classy, elegant, and a talented actress, who has it together.

  19. lafairy says:

    I wish I will look this good when I will be 38!!!

    and about motherhood: stop being judgemental people! to each its own! I think there is as much conceptions of motherhood (or desire of not being a mother) than there are mothers, believing in what comply with expectations don’t give any right to anybody to judge the others on this matter.

    Mind your own motherhood ladies, Bedhead has the right to live hers and talk about it just like she wants, not your business!

  20. Alana Fajina says:

    Such hotties the pair of em. I love that Spanish confidence!!

  21. Becks11980 says:

    So glad there are “superstars” out there who will say this. I’m 32 and I have known for 11 years that I do not want to have children naturally, much to the disdain of my GP. Some people should not have children and I am one of them. I am not a horrible person or violent but I am selfish and have no maternal instincts, and I get worse the older I get. I would not make a good mother and I know that. I have always thought that if I felt that overwhelming urge then I would adopt but it is highly unlikely. I’m very protective of my little cousins and friends babies but I am so happy to give them back. I’m drunk and waffeling so I’m going to go to sleep now. Night night CB peeps

    • zenb!tch says:

      I’m 10 years older than you and I’ve always been like you. I don’t want to have kids. I’m not maternal. I was born this way. I did not want to play mommy with the baby dolls. I played Barbie and race cars and baseball. However, what I REALLY do not want is to give birth. I don’t want to be pregnant. I’ve always thought if I changed my mind I would adopt. I do not see the need to have my own.

  22. Andrea says:

    I just moved to Canada 2 months ago from the US. In the US, I got harassed all the time by coworkers/friends who felt I was missing out by not having kids. I’m 31. now that I am up here, no one says a damn thing, most especially my coworkers. It is SUCH a relief. one coworker is pregnant and living with her bf and not one person in the office says the typical stuff i heard in the states: you have to give the kid his last name, you really should get married. I didn’t realize how traditional and conservative the Us was until I moved to Canada. I am so grateful i do not get any grief for not wanting to be a mom.

  23. Alnaaze says:

    Thank you for including this! I am someone who is not particularly interested in having kids – and I’m ok with that! But somehow society doesn’t seem to want to agree, and tries to make you feel like a lesser woman because of it. But each of us is different I don’t see why we should all have to be parents to be happy!