Ryan O’Neal’s PCP smoking son tied up in Dog Run. Hijinx Ensue.

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The crazy is clearly on the loose once again over at the O’Neal household. Details of Ryan O’Neals arrest for assault and possession of a handgun earlier this week – hit the pages of the National Enquirer today. Talk about the Devil being in the details … Satan must have had to work overtime and outsource the rest to Banglaore’s talented deviltry programmers to get this amount of crazy jammed into one birthday jamboree:

A happy Ryan O’Neal returned from a birthday party for his longtime love Farrah Fawcett to find his son Redmond tied up in a dog run by his brother Griffin O’Neal.

That shocking sight was the REAL trigger behind Ryan’s Feb. 2 rampage …

Accounts of what occurred differ — but Ryan claims Griffin was the aggressor, who picked up a fireplace poker and started swinging it. The actor says his son aimed at his head — grazing him four or five times.

“I ducked,” says the burly film star. “He hit his own girlfriend in the head.”

Ryan insists he got his gun and fired it simply to scare off his out-of-control son.

via Gossip Rocks

There’s nothing like a little domestic gunfire to defuse a situation.
The More You Know.
Cue Star Across the Sky Graphic.

The O’Neal saga continues as a he said/he said debate between father and son. All the classics. Who swung which poker at whom first. Who threw which glass ashtray into which girlfriends face. Whether the bound and gagged son in the dog run scenario was:

a) reasonable attempt to keep a PCP smoker away from his stash, or

b) a violation of ASPCA norms.

c) Some s**t Dr. Phil coudn’t even sort out, or

d) Good Reason to call in Kimora Lee Simmons … so She Could beat a dog run bitch down

The Enquirer’s source for the story had this take:

“After Griffin was attacked with the poker, he flung a heavy glass ash tray at his dad, who ducked, and it hit Joanne in the face and caused her injuries.

“After the poker attacks — as Griffin and Joanne were being treated by medical personnel outside the Malibu house — Griffin remembered he’d left his dog in the house.

“When Griffin went back in, Ryan apparently shot at him and missed. The bullet went into a wall, not injuring anyone.

“The firemen and paramedics outside heard the shot and called cops, who arrested O’Neal and took him to jail.”

Griffin insists his father tried to kill him, says the friend. “He wants him charged with attempted murder. He’s claiming, ‘My dad went off his rocker.’”

A ruffled Ryan was booked by Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Deputies and released around 5:30 a.m. after posting a $50,000 bond.

(from The National Enquirer)

And people wonder why Farrah always seems so rattled and odd when she does talk shows. Clearly a little Seconal before any event is just the world’s sanest ounce of prevention. God Bless You Miss Fawcett. untitledfar.jpg

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11 Responses to “Ryan O’Neal’s PCP smoking son tied up in Dog Run. Hijinx Ensue.”

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  1. Bex says:

    I love how you keep throwing in Kimora’s comment “beat a bitch’s ass.” That’s excellent!

  2. gg says:

    Poor Farrah. I have newfound respect for her, but feel awful that she has had to endure all the fighting. Fighting like that is extremely dysfunctional for anybody, and terrorizes the other family members.

  3. UrbanDK says:

    I know … Celebitchy turned me onto the KLS quote of the century ..and I think its gonna replace the National Anthem adn E Pluribus Unum …

  4. lyric says:

    This story is almost too crazy to be anything but true.

  5. UrbanDK says:

    I know … its got that Feed Me Seymour flavoe that keeps you coming back for more

  6. UrbanDK says:

    I love that picture Of Farrah twice as much everytime I see it

  7. Gigohead says:

    Whatis with these landscape pictures on the main site? Where are they from?

  8. celebitchy says:

    Gigohead I am on vacation, so those are meant to be general vacation-type pictures. I set them up ahead of time for UrbanDK so he would not have to fiddle with that.

  9. UrbanDK says:

    Cause you know me If I am fiddling .. then Rome is Burning … and the pope aint made of asbestos

  10. Randi says:

    Poor Ryan. He’s going to be upstaged by ANS’s death in the tabloids.

  11. frewtloop says:

    Excellent and amusing post DK. I like option D the best….

    How incredibly dysfunctional and Hollywood. Ryan should have sent those two kids to bording school in Switzerland.