I was a little surprised at how much attention yesterday’s Kelly Clarkson post received. To recap, Kelly said on Ryan Seacrest’s radio show that she feels comfortable marrying her man to be, talent manager Brandon Blackstock, because she enjoys being a mom to his two kids. It sounded a little disrespectful of their mother, who some reports claim is still in the picture. She said “I have a 12-year-old and a 6-year-old now… We all live together and everything… I actually really dig the mom thing.” On the surface it wasn’t that bad, and maybe she was just over enthusiastic about caring for Brandon’s kids. I do think she should tread lightly and not refer to the children as hers.
In that Ryan Seacrest interview, Kelly revealed that she’s tired of planning her wedding. Her wedding was set for October 20th and she’d already sent out “save the date” cards. She said, “I’m so over it. It’s so overwhelming… We’re just doing a lot: touring and the wedding and the Christmas album (out Oct. 29).”
Kelly has since announced that her big wedding is off and that she’s going to elope. She also talked about Brandon’s kids again as if she was their mom.
Despite original plans for an “earthy” outdoor fall wedding at home, the “Catch My Breath” singer, 31, revealed to PEOPLE on Wednesday, “We are so busy that we finally just came to terms the other night and were like, ‘So, we change our minds and we want to elope.’ We just got so overwhelmed by it – all the decisions.”
“Then honestly the planning – I have a Christmas record coming out. I’m doing a bunch of stuff with State Farm right now (the singer is teaming up with the insurance company to educate kids about safe driving). We have two kids who just started school. We’re going to all these football games and soccer games and volleyball games and [Brandon]’s got one of the biggest artists [Blake Shelton] in country music. He’s flying everywhere.”
When the musically inclined pair finally made their decision about how to say “I do,” they “sent out an engagement photo to everyone and said, ‘Thank you so much for understanding, but it’s just going to be me and Brandon and his two kids and the minister,’ ” Clarkson says.
And even after they elope, an extravagant fête is the furthest thing from their minds.
“Our whole life is a celebration,” the former American Idol winner says. “That’s what we kept laughing about. We don’t need another day where we throw a big party. Our lives are so in the spotlight all the time. Everything is such a spectacle, we were like, ‘We would rather have an intimate moment that’s special.’ ”
But that doesn’t mean their lives will be soirée-free.
“We’re going to do that anyway,” she says. “Our friend is throwing us [a party] because we’re about to wrap up construction at our house. He’s throwing us a huge stock the bar party, so all of the people who were going to be at our wedding will be there.”
She’s just trying to emphasize that she’s very busy with the kids I guess. I hear those of you who say that it’s better that she’s involved in the kids’ lives and cares about them. I still think she shouldn’t refer to them as her kids or “our” kids, they have a mom. Who knows what the story is there, though.
In terms of her wedding, is anyone else getting the vibe that one of them has cold feet? I mentioned that I don’t trust this Brandon guy. He looked like a douche when she gave him a shout out during her Grammy speech. It’s probably a good idea to cancel the wedding and just wait a while to see how things go. There’s no rush to elope.
Here are Kelly’s engagement photos, the newest of which she posted on Facebook on Tuesday. She also has that “Tie it Up” song and video which show different couples getting married. It doesn’t seem like her to cancel her wedding like that, and it sounds like it was abrupt.
I don’t understand why people get upset when step parents refer to step children as “theirs” (see Gisele, Leann, etc). No, I’m not a parent, but who the hell cares, the more loving parents a kid can have the better.
I agree. I have a step dad and a biological father and I am a “daughter” to both. I don’t see why it’s a big deal. Maybe in Leann’s case because she does it for publicity but I don’t see why Kelly should stop- she seems genuine.
Agreed. As a former stepchild in a messy situation, it always felt like my stepmother thought my sister and I were burdens to her new happy life.
It doesn’t feel like Kelly is trying to diminish the kids’ mom in any way, or overstep her boundaries. Can’t she just genuinely love and care for her fiancé’s children?
She seems sweet and loving so that is the best situation that could be hoped for…however…try being a mother to my babies and see what f*cking happens. Goes the same way with a man. The thought of someone other than my husband “parenting” my kid….gah. I cringe every time I see Casper Smart with those babies. I mean who the hell IS this guy you are letting be so close to your kids?
itstrue –
I don’t have a problem with what Kelly Clarkson said. My comment is in regard to your remark about Casper Smart.
I think certain celebrities – Halle Berry, Jennifer Lopez – strike out at their exes by very deliberately having pictures taken of the new guy carrying their children. It’s very passive aggressive and mean spirited.
I think there is a respect level with this so that is an issue. For me though with celebrities doing it is more about the perception they try to give off and a feeling of using the kids for positive PR.
I mean Giselle, Megan fox and Leanne (before real housewives) get more press then the children’s actual mothers who have them the majority of the time (well not Leanne it split) so it feels like they are trying to spin a story that is just not true.
I don’t know anything about this situation but if the mother is involved in the kids life then Kelly whom I am a fan needs to make sure she isn’t sending out the wrong message, it will just hurt the kids in the long run.
Let me be clear I think it is great that step parents love and view their step children as their own they should, however, when in the public eye all step parents need to look at jada smith because that woman has shown she views will’s first child as her own but knows she is not the mother and that his mother is a fabulous, present active full time mom. She made sure that was shown because its the truth and best for the child.
This I understand. If calling my kids “yours” is in any way done for some sort of self-promotion, you stop. Right now. But if you refer to them as yours in everyday conversation, then I don’t mind that so much. As long as they are saying “my mommy” when they refer to [step-parent]
@naye I think that is what it is with celebrities, there is a feeling of what’s behind this and are you trying to erase the last relationship for public image. I don’t think Kelly is doing that she hasn’t pulled that crap in the past but since I have no doubt Giselle, Megan and Leanne are it puts me on edge with Kelly who I think is just really excited and not thinking of how she sounds.
Seriously though jada should teach a class because on a normal day can’t stand her but when it comes to her relationship with wills son and ex I have nothing but respect.
It’s definitely a red flag when you hear a celebrity, used to yes men all around them, talk about stepparenting in an aggressive manner. Certain word choices can make it sound like they think they’re going to jump in and start running the show. That is not a good way to approach joining a blended family. It’s incredibly self-centered and I automatically start to feel bad for the other parent in dealing with this person.
I have two amazing, out of this world stepsons but I refer to them as “the boys” and not “my boys” or “our boys” We hav a close relationship but I always wonder how their mom would feel if she heard me call them mine. She is a terrific mom and has always been wonderful to me. But even if she were lazy and stupud or whatever she will always be mom.
Calm down Kelly. Oh yeah, since when does a busy celeb not gave a wedding planner/event coordinator on speed dial if she is planning to tie the knot? Something kinda desperate and sad going on under the surface here, imo.
Agree, I don’t get it at all. I have a (step) son that I call son, otherwise I’m basically saying he’s not good enough as my daughter – that I have to point out I haven’t given birth to him – I think to say ‘step’ anything is insulting, along with ‘half’ brother/sister – why do you have to clarify?
It does bother me in KC case, and its not bc of possibly offending the mother, its bc more often than not when the step parent divorces the parent, they have little to none of the same level of affection for the children that they loved so when they were with the parent, and ultimately that confuses and hurts the child. I could be wrong with Kelly, but would they still be “her” kids if she found out he was dishonest or cheating? I think unless you’re ready and willing to make a true commitment to the child based on your love for the child himself, you should never call your SO’s kids yours.
I AM a step-mother to two beautiful children. I have been in their lives since they were 2 and 4.
I’d be so royally pissed if someone attacked me as to whether or not I was their mom. They do not call me “mom” but they call me “mine” which has always been their word for mom. I do everything a mother does and get the same crap back talk (now that the kids are teens –uuggh *head in hands*). All in all it takes more than birthing a child to be a mother 🙂
I like Kelly but she really should be more sensitive, those kids have a mother.
I hope she isn’t another LeAnn? She’s treading on dangerous grounds if so. She looks beautiful in the photos. I don’t trust this guy, he seems smarmy.
If she said “his kids”, thus post would be about how she thinks of the kids as not part of her family.
she’s damned if she does, damned if she doesn’t.
Thank you. If she said ”his kids” people would jump down her throat about the fact that if she’s marrying him, then they’re a part of her family too. Blended families are hard, and the best that we can hope for is that the new spouse can love and care for the kids as though they were their own. Yes, she needs to respect the mom, but who are we to assume from a single soundbyte that she’s trying to push the mom out of the picture? She’s marrying a man with kids and is excited to have them in her life, and people are nitpicking over this?
Yes, exactly. We fully expect non-famous step-parents to love and accept their S.O.’s kids as their own, but when a celebrity does it, we create some dramatic story behind it, like they couldn’t possibly be sincere or something.
I don’t think he acted douchy during her acceptance speech. He looked slightly amused and shaking his head a little like “oh my.”
As for changing the wedding plans… I don’t know. I do know I got cold feet at actually having a formal wedding and Jay and I changed our plans last minute to do a tiny wedding with just his best friend, his kids, and my best friend present. And we’ll do a party or something down the line.
She’s turning into Leann Rimes and that’s not a good thing. Why does she keeping saying they are her children? I also don’t know why she’s going so over the top with all the engagement photos! That album cover will come back to haunt her when they get a divorce.
Because the are. Even if they are just stepkids, they are HER stepkids. I think people get up in arms over it because of Leanne, but really, if Kelly and Brandon were to have children together, should she only refer to those children as HERS even when she is raising and loving the other two? How would that affect the children to know that the step parent is making an active distinction between “your kids, out kids, or my kids” when all children should be receiving the same about of love. I think that making that an open disparity is more harmful to children than helpful, and the best thing she can do for their real mother is to show her respect AND give them as much love as possible.
+1, Naye.
So well said.
Elizabeth — she is a million miles away from being Leann rimes
Uh oh — bong, bong, bong. I am hearing the death-knell of the relationship.
I have a feeling that there will be no marriage for these two.
When you start talking about how you are soooo very busy that you can’t move forward as planned —- that is a bad sign.
And, I know this sounds really dumb. But. I remember reading a quote from his mom saying she was “happy as hell” to have Kelly as a member of the family. There was just something that that struck me as odd about that quote. And I am not sure why.
And I really adore Kelly. She seems so sweet. I hope she does not get d*cked over in this relationship.
The engagement photos are beautiful though. I want that dress in the top photo. The photo of her in the library is beautiful as well. I think it would have also been good as a couple shot with both reading on the windowsill.
For someone who seems to really be into wearing wedding dresses and the whole fairy tale shtick, it does seem odd that she’d be overwhelmed to the point of cancelling the big wedding and eloping. Many normal people without access to millions of dollars and the best wedding planners still manage to plan successful weddings both large and small. If you want it you just do it. If it is overwhelming, just postpone the date to November or December. She has the money to literally do this at any time anywhere in the world.
I don’t know if I buy the excuse and I smell something fishy. If she is overwhelmed, why isn’t her fiance helping her out? Despite my doubts about her seemingly douchey fiance, I think the decision to elope will only help Kelly win more fans. Many people are sick of celebrities wasting millions of dollars on extravagant weddings, especially in tough times. However, I don’t think Kelly needs to spend much money to have a nice low-key event if having a wedding is what she really wants.
On the subject of “her” children, she should probably tone it down a bit. It’s great that she loves her stepchildren, but she has seemed so overly enthusiastic about this man and his children even though I don’t sense that he is as enthusiastic and into her. If anyone got cold feet about the wedding, I’m going to put my money on him. I hope that I and many of the commenters here are wrong though.
As someone who planned a ‘low key’ wedding (read ‘adorable but seemed on the outside low key but was packed with so many decisions and details that I got fibro from it after’), being a normal person does not excuse you from not havin the capacity to create a ‘simple’ wedding. Even destination weddings are a pain and you have a planner! Planning is haaaaaard, and looking back, we 100% should have eloped.
I give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe it was too overwhelming & they would rather elope. Tomorrow hubby & I will celebrate 17 yrs of marriage. Could have easily been said about us. We had the minister, invitations, flowers ,our mothers helping me w/ planning & well basically almost everything coming together (even family coming in from different states). I was however in & out of the hospital even back then. After being rushed back to the ER & being readmitted yet again from complications from my previous month long admission I was really feeling overwhelmed & we could have postponed & reset everything for much later. But hubby was not wanting to wait any longer & not wanting me stressed. So when I was finally released, knowing I was going back in the hospital in a few weeks for further surgery he asked me to meet w/ him & the minister after At what was to be our future home (we live by a lake) and invited in town family only. We wound up getting married one month exactly before our planned wedding date, wish was also our first official date a yr previously. If they have the 18 yrs I have just had minus health issues.. I would say they are a very lucky couple. I hope they do because I really like her:). & wish her many more:)
So glad Jay and I decided to elope. Getting married sooner and with much less fanfare! We’re too old for the fanfare anyway!
As a mom, it’s disrespectful. They are not your children, they are your partner’s children. I have no problem with someone else loving my kids. That’s not an issue. The more they’re loved, the better. But you’re not they’re mother, I am. As a step-parent, your job is to be their friend, not parent. To play good cop and gain their trust and respect while their parent plays bad cop (dealing with punishments when the kids step out of line). It’s a fine line to walk, and it’s hard. But you have to respect their biological patents.
I totally agree, except that a stepparent is more like an aunt/uncle, not a friend.
I don’t agree on the friend thing – as a step parent you should also be the one to make rules around the house about house work, cleaning etc. While you leave the big like school decisions and so to the mother and father.
If my ex were to get married, I would expect my daughter to treat her step parent with the same authority and respect she gives me. I would also expect the woman to treat them like her own children, with respect to love and to discipline (within boundaries, a tough line to toe). That makes me feel like my child is getting the proper parenting all around by not drawing a division by saying “you can love my kid within limits.” I wouldn’t trust an ADULT hanging around my kid, just trying to only be thier friend. Those are the kinds of people that sneak your kids alcohol, or let them go to parties you forbade them to go to. You should love my child enough that you would want to give them the proper guidance rather than just be their friend. I would rather the step parent have equal opportunity to face adolescent rage. I would also hope to have a good enough relationship with said step parent to know what is going on in the house when I am not there. it isn’t taking my place. It’s being another parental figure for the child to have. Having the kids call the step parent MOM may be totally out of the question, but I have no problem with the woman calling them her kids, as long as WE ALL know that I am their mother. But maybe I’m idealistic. Probably. I just think a lot of this is more about ownership, and less about respect.
As a mom, I would be horrified if one of the adults living (part-time at least) expected to be a ‘friend’ and ‘yes man’. I would be horrified if it was a grandparent, and I’d be horrified if it was a stepparent. Children need boundaries, and if they know that only one parent is allowed to enforce the rules (and they KNOW) then that is a recipe for disaster. That’s not in anyone’s best interests – not the stepparent who’s been relegated to ‘friend’, not to the spouse who’s stuck being bad cop all the time, and ultimately it’s not even fair to the Mom, who most likely wont enjoy the contrast between the ‘fun’ stepparent and herself.
To state that a stepparent’s job is just to be a kid’s friend is incredibly selfish, and the only person it benefits is the Mom who feels her position is being threatened. It’s certainly not in the best interest of the kids.
I think LeAnn has ruined you guys, you’re reading way too much into it. Yeah she seems a bit over enthusiastic, but honestly when does she not seem that way? I dunno, maybe because I don’t have kids I’m not offended..
I do have kids… and it’s hard to say how I would feel in such a situation, but I tend to agree with you. Kelly has always been very candid and enthusiastic in interviews. Many love her for this, myself included. Sounds like she is just being herself, and honest… they have a lot going on and she is babbling about it, including ‘the kids’ and all of their activities.
This may be way out there, but maybe… just maybe the parties involved have actually discussed this, and the children’s mother is okay with Kelly referring to them the way she does. If she is not, I’m sure it will be discussed and I don’t see Kelly straying into LR territory… at all.
On a side note, I adore the window photo with all of the books!! LOVE!
that is a really beautiful photo
OMG, Y’ALL don’t have children. HE has children. He has children with his ex-wife, who is still in the picture. If you had helped raise them from when they were toddlers and the wife wasn’t in the picture, or you legally adopted them, then you could claim them. If you want a kid to call your own, get knocked up. THEN y’all will have a child.
She clearly has some major issues leftover from her parents’ divorce. Also, that rope around her wrist on the cover of her single says everything. I never realized how desperate she is. She and Jennifer Love Hewitt should be best friends.
She’s just following the family model as Brandon’s stepmother, Reba, always states she has five kids despite giving birth to only one. When you commit to a parent you commit to their kids!
+1
My sister was more of a parent to her step-daughter than her husband was. Because she actually took on that role as parent, and claimed the girl as hers, now that they are divorced, she still has an active role in the girls life. I still consider her my niece. She has a very strained relationship with her father, but because my sister took it upon herself to love that child fully, and reach out to her biological mother, she still remains active in her life, and she is another person the girl can turn to, even though her dumb dad duped everybody.
She has talked about nothing but the wedding and she has done wedding photo shoots and videos. Now, suddenly, it’s too much? Something is weird. I don’t get a Leann vibe from her- Leann is beyond over the top inappropriate as a stepparent, especially considering how she forced her way into their lives- but Kelly is not being particularly sensitive. First of all, his ex-wife doesn’t need to hear and read how even when Brandon was married, Kelly always knew they’d end up together. It’s almost like she’s being coy about something. And second, it is insensitive to continually refer to Brandon’s kids as hers and how she has to raise them. If she is helping to raise them and loves them, that’s awesome, but it’s insensitive to go on and on in the press about how you’re a mom with kids now and you have so, so much to do with these kids as though their mom as abandoned them and no longer wants to parent them. Loving your stepkids means respecting their parents and understanding your place in their lives. I would not be surprised if their mom speaks out in an interview.
She’s starting to walk the fine line between mostly innocent excitement and possible self-promotion of her role with the kids.
I have not followed these two closely, but I do get the impression from photos and interviews that she’s more into him. I have always had the same vibe about Reba and his dad.
Emphasizing the stepmom role in interviews could be a way of trying to win points with him – and maybe the public, too.
ITA- something weird is going on. She is trying too hard to do and be whatever he seems to need, but that’s just an opinion.
His dad had 4 young kids when he married his boss, Reba. The kids’ mother and later at least one daughter were not entirely happy campers, based on articles and interviews. I wonder if Kelly will end up poking the bear with her guy’s ex.
She’s not being disrespectful. My stepfather introduces me to people all the time as his daughter, and it doesn’t bother me. My dad has no problem with it. Also, I don’t think she’s trying to emphasize that it’s mostly the kids keeping them busy. She named several other factors as well.
Sure, but your (step)dad isn’t giving public interviews about you, right?
and how would the kids feel if they read this and found out that kelly doesn’t think of them as hers as well? as if they aren’t as important? that could cause all sorts of problems. and further more, it looks as if she was asked a question and she was answering it, vs just offering up info herself. those kids are obviously important to her and she’s involved in their lives, just be thankful she cares.
What does that matter? She’s not being offensive.
Yeah when she said that Leann Rimes popped into my head.
Don’t go down that road Kelly, we still like you!
I agree with the poster up thread. There are these things that we call wedding planners who do all the annoying logistics and planning for you. If I can afford one, surely Kelly can. I also think something is fishy about this announcement.
Something definitely seems off.
ita
and i’m a big fan of a very small wedding but there is something hinky here
She could do so much better.. the guy has so much baggage.. and he is her mgr? any other clients? geeze how lame
He’s Blake Shelton’s manager.
A very close friend of mine is a step-mother to her husband’s daughter. She has been in the child’s life since she was very young, loves her, and has always had a good relationship with her. But my friend has always been mindful of the fact that she is not the mother. Her husband and his ex are not exactly warm and fuzzy to each other, but all in all it’s pretty amicable.
A couple of years ago at the child’s sweet sixteen, the ex thanked my friend, acknowledged that they all had a hand in raising a wonderful young lady, and that my friend has been a second mother to her daughter. It was very touching to hear especially since my friend has not been able to have children of her own thus far.
Each situation is different. I just think Kelly is excited, I doubt she wants to take over as mother. But we don’t know the whole story. Either way, I wish her well.
The child has been in your friend’s life for YEARS, not months right? My Stepdad adopted me also, legally, some time after my real Father passed. But my parents had been married 10 or so years. I think most of all the lack of time that has passed is what is suspicious here.
Am I missing something? The only thing I see is her saying “his kids”, not hers. I don’t think she’s even close to Leann territory. But I do think she should be careful how much she speaks about them publicly.
I was just in a wedding for a friend, and there was SOOOO much drama and stress, so I can understand someone deciding to simplify and just have a small ceremony and then later a party. As long as they’re happy and it’s about the marriage, not a dress and gifts, it’ll be good.
yeah, she doesn’t actually refer to them as “our kids.” she says “we’ve got the kids” which is true since they live with her and her fiance. and afterwards she refers to them as “brandon’s kids.” i don’t understand why this would be upsetting.
How was he a douche to her at the Grammy’s? I missed that gossip!
I do like the blonde hair though.
I’m not sure I buy the wedding/elopement story. These are two wealthy people we’re talking about. All they really need to do is hand the reigns over to a competent wedding planner and then show up. It could simply be a morning of primping followed by an afternoon ceremony and reception with their closest family and friends at their home. Don’t get me wrong, if that’s what they choose then so be it since many people do it that way but I really don’t buy her reasoning/excuses.
First off “our” could mean her, brandon AND the kids mom. I don’t think she’s claiming them as just hers like LeeAnn does. Further more as a step-child and step-sibling i have a REAL relationship with one of my step-brothers whom I consider a real brother, because he never made a distinction. Neither did his father, and that never negated my relationship with my real father whom i’m extremely close to. my brother is closer to my mother than his own-because my mom always treated him as her own from day one. it was never my kid and step-kids. it was ALWAYS OUR KIDS. my dad appreciated that as well. i like the fact Kelly already considers those kids hers as well, it bodes well for her relationship with the kids. and honestly-THAT is important.
I love Kelly…..
But yikes at that album cover.
At least she didn’t use the term bonus mom.
I’m going to give her the benefit of the doubt for now because I like her. 🙂
As mentioned above, Kelly has always been very honest and enthusiastic in interviews… she has been known to over share a bit sometimes, and I think she is doing that here, but not intentionally. She seems to be honest, talking about all that is going on. I’m sure if the kids are living with them, and she is trying to be involved in all of their activities, then that is a very new and big part of her life, so she is babbling about it. I’m a babbler (clearly…lol) so I can’t fault her for that. 😉 If she is over-sharing about the kids, or being a bit insensitive to their mother, I kind of don’t think she realizes it. I also doubt she would sound quite this way if the kids lived with their mother most of the time and their father (and Kelly) only had them visiting every other weekend.
I have a feeling that even if all parties involved are okay with the way she is talking about it, someone in her circle is still going to give her a bit of guidance, if only for the fact that we are all talking about it. 🙂
Oh and I’ll say it again, I simply adore that photo of Kelly in the window, reading…. surrounded by all of those beautiful books!
There sure seem to be a lot of articles out there saying him and his wife divorced due to his cheating.
And she wants to marry this guy?
Maybe it’s bc I’ve been around chics w/o kids who date/marry men with kids and have seen first hand how dilusional they get…and it ain’t cute! But these women are all needy and I don’t see kelly being any different then them with this style of same talk.
All I want to know is, was she able to take Jane Austen’s ring out of England? I hope so.
I cannot understand how people can have a problem with this. There is just another person devoting their lives to loving those children, how is that bad in any way? People will serioiusly find anything to bitch about these days….
cute song!
This reminds me of how much it used to bug me when Ashton Kutcher would talk about the responsibilities of raising daughters. I know they all made a show of friendship, but Bruce Willis must have been seething with rage.
Solution: stop getting divorced at the drop of a f$&@ing hat and we wouldn’t have this problem as often.
I am not a bible thumper. I am a progressive ny’er raised by a single mom who lives in and loves the land of fruits and nuts.