Louis CK covers GQ: ‘I’ve never been suicidal. But I’ve wanted to be’


Louis CK: Would you hit it? That’s what I’m thinking about after I read his GQ cover interview for the May issue. The piece is very complimentary towards Louis, even bordering on annoyingly descriptive about his talent. I mean, I think Louis CK is brilliant, amazing and incredibly funny. But hearing a writer explain why Louis CK is so brilliant and funny is not all that. But back to my first point: yes, I would hit it. I like some ginger, I don’t mind bald and Louis’s dark humor would get me into bed. You can read the full GQ piece here, and here are some highlights:

C.K. on discomfort: “You’ve got to embrace discomfort. It’s the only way you can put yourself in situations where you can learn, and the only way you can keep your senses fresh once you’re there.”

C.K. on sitting with the black kids at lunch at his predominately all-white junior high school: “It was awkward and scary, but I made a lot of black friends, and that was the only way to do it. It had to be uncomfortable. It was actually racist, ’cause I was sitting down with these kids only because they were black. Sometimes discomfort is the only way through.”

Religion: “I’m not an atheist. I think God is there and that He is watching and He made us. I just don’t give a sh-t.”

Phones: “The phones are taking away the ability to just sit there. That’s being a person. Because underneath everything in your life there is that forever-empty thing…that knowledge that it’s all for nothing and you’re alone…. The thing is, because we don’t want that first bit of sad, we push it away with a little phone or a jack-off…. You never feel completely sad or completely happy, just kinda satisfied with your product, and then you die.”

C.K. on wanting to be suicidal: “No, I’ve never been suicidal. But I’ve wanted to be….It never stopped getting worse. I remember thinking, This is too much for me to handle. I wanted to give up. I knew it was my right to. But then a few minutes would go by and I’d realize, I’m still here. In other words, there was no escape from it. And I’d be a little disappointed at not being truly suicidal. I hated being ‘all right.’ ”

[From GQ]

He also tells a story about his daughters and how they like his jokes and “get” (or inherited) his dark sense of humor. I have to admit something – while I know some general stuff about Louis CK’s past and I’m very familiar with his stand-up and TV shows, I didn’t realize before this piece that he and Chris Rock have been tight for more than two decades. Louis was a writer on The Chris Rock Show and Rock has been a friend and a champion for his career for a long time. That’s very cool.


Photos courtesy of Peggy Sirota/GQ.

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33 Responses to “Louis CK covers GQ: ‘I’ve never been suicidal. But I’ve wanted to be’”

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  1. Aurie says:

    Honestly I feel almost all people have flirted with the idea of suicide, not seriously though. Like in college one time I had a really bad month, in terms of workload (just seemed to have no break to recover) and I literally stared at the window in my dorm room (which is on the 11th floor) and thought “If I jumped out, no more worries”….but of course I was not serious at all….it was just a 1 minute fantasy, what if.

    • Sarah says:

      going through with it is a completly different matter, most people fail at their fist attempts because they dont really want to die.

    • MrsBPitt says:

      I think you are right…my hubby and I were talking about suicide the other day (long story) and he shocked me by saying, that when he was in college he had done really poorly on an important paper and he thought about suicide…I think sometimes when we are in pain and are trying to think of anyway to stop that feeling, yeah, suicide will pop into your mind for a few minutes…

  2. Giselle says:

    I’d hit it! Love him.

  3. Sarah says:

    i love Louis but i cant with all those superlatives in magazines anymore. most of the times its not even the “best” but just the people who showed up for the photoshoot. it makes a lot of those big, powerful words meaningless.

    calling a comedian the funniest person is actually a very bad thing. Jerry Seinfeld and Louis talk about that in “Talking Funny”. the comedian is pratically guaranteed to fail if you introduce him to the crowd as “the funniest”.

  4. Miffy says:

    I think anyone who has been under extreme duress has gone through that thought process. There’s something just sickly and perversely empowering about knowing “I can make this stop”… And then taking a deep breath and powering on anyway.

    It’s when those thoughts become frequent that it may be time to review things in earnest.

    • Sarah says:

      yes, as i said above actually doing it is way different. most people think about suicide as kind of an easy exit strategy or plan B.

      • Miffy says:

        You’re right. I think it’s almost a way of putting it in context for yourself. When you get to that point you reach the realisation, ‘Wait, am I really going to do that to myself, family and friends over an essay/bills/job/breakup?’ And you snap out of it.

        Legitimately suicidal thoughts are a different ball game, sadly.

  5. MrsBPitt says:

    I don’t know if I’d hit…but I seriously think about it…making me laugh is a big turn on for me…but, he’d have to make me laugh really hard to tap that!

    • Sarah says:

      is this really true for you? i hear that from a lot of women but i rarely see women dating the guys that make them laugh so hard. comedians also never really have groupies where as pratically every crappy band has some.

      • MrsBPitt says:

        @sarah – Yup, its true…I can meet a guy (not anymore, I’m married) and not be really attracted to him, but if we strike up a conversation and he has a great sense of humor, that makes me very attracted to him…

      • melodycalder says:

        I’m sure it depends on the comedian. For example consider Dane Cook and Daniel Tosh. I remember watching an episode of tosh where he was at a college and he gave the students 10 second each to meet him and leave an impression….. I was so embarrassed as a woman watching all those girls “offer” themselves to him. They showed him reading the stack of notes and numbers afterward…. Way too may “DTF” comments. Ugh. Gross

  6. gloaming says:

    LOUIS!! I Love him.

    Would love to get a look at his girlfriend – if they’re still together….

  7. Kiddo says:

    Nope, not interested in hitting it unless that refers to a good back slapping laugh.

  8. TheCountess says:

    You know what, up his. I’ve been hospitalized for saying shit when I was depressed and I just don’t find it amusing for someone to flirt with suicidal comments. I never found him funny to begin with, and this just cemented my dislike.

    • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

      I don’t know much about him, but I thought his remark was childish and insensitive to people who endure emotional pain so intense that every minute of survival is excruciating, and they manage somehow to hang on until it gets better or they find some help, or they can’t take any more and they make a horrible choice. That’s not funny to me, and I don’t think he has experienced anything like it.

      • Wilma says:

        Yeah, me too. I’m hoping my depressed and suicidal sister won’t read this interview.

      • V says:

        Yeah, having a bad day and being melodramatic about it is a far cry from actually being suicidal and being hospitalized or jailed because of it. If he’s so upset about not being suicidal, I’ll gladly give my illness to him.

      • kim says:

        Really? Childish and insensitive?

        “No, I’ve never been suicidal. But I’ve wanted to be….It never stopped getting worse. I remember thinking, This is too much for me to handle. I wanted to give up. I knew it was my right to. But then a few minutes would go by and I’d realize, I’m still here. In other words, there was no escape from it. And I’d be a little disappointed at not being truly suicidal. I hated being ‘all right.

        Here’s how I read it (first of all, no one knows what they cut out in the ellipsis) “I wanted to be”–meaning, I wanted to believe that suicide was the solution and would help, but then realized, its not, its not the way out, there is no way out, sometimes life just needs to be endured. Yes, there is a loss in that—kind of like I was disappointed by the knowledge that there was no “answer” no “easy exit.” “I hated being all right”–I wish there was something other that just being “all right” but in this life, often there is not and life is making the best out of a bad situation.

        In my book, this actually makes him mature, more mature than most. I don’t know that this is how he meant it, but from watching him for a while, I would WAGER that it was…

      • GoodNamesAllTaken says:


        If you’re sad, and find life a struggle, but then you’re “alright” after “a few minutes have gone by,” you have no inkling of what it feels like to be suicidal. Having the blues is not being clinically depressed. Realizing that life is cruel and difficult and there’s no easy way out is a normal part of growing up. Being suicidal is enduring an emotional pain so intense that it takes every minute of your entire day just to stand it. I can’t put into words how much it hurts. How, even though you know your husband, your parents and your children would be sad if you were gone, you wonder if they won’t be better off. You don’t believe you have anything to give them. You see yourself as a burden, because life just hurts too f@ing much for you to be able to do anything but hurt and try to survive the hurt for one more minute, one more hour and one more day. You don’t want to die, you just want the pain to stop so you can rest, just for a minute.

        He has no idea what he’s talking about. And yes, he sounds like a child to me. “I wasn’t suicidal, but I wanted to be…” Screw you, buddy. Feel what it REALLY feels like for 15 minutes, and then tell me you wish you felt like that all the time.

    • Danskins says:

      +1 @ Countess…been there…suicide is no joke.

  9. Mabs says:

    Love him. And he makes it easy to love him on top of already loving him. lol!

  10. poppy says:

    ITA w/ him about the products and gadgets.
    and god, but he has it wrong, it is god that doesn’t give a sh!t.

  11. MonicaQ says:

    I’m pretty sure my inner-voices are him, Louis Black, and Kat Williams. Kills me.

  12. Mandy says:

    I adore Louis CK! I have always been strangely attracted to him! So yes, I would hit it. 🙂

  13. Ag says:

    Love him! But no, I wouldn’t hit it. Haha

  14. Patricia says:

    My brother committed suicide and I’ve struggled with it the past 30+ years. I get what he’s saying and I don’t find it offensive. He’ll hurt some for saying it though. The only way to not offend is to keep your mouth shut. The pain of others is impossible to understand and it is important to be mindful of that.

  15. ella says:

    Not sure this is any different than Brandi wishing she’d been molested.

  16. maybeiamcrazy says:

    Only after he makes me laugh all night. Then i’d hit it. My panties don’t stand a chance against dark humor and sarcasm.

  17. Emily C. says:

    Sure. With a brick. He WANTED to be suicidal? Is that supposed to be a joke?

    I’ve been suicidal. It’s hell. It’s not funny. It’s not some kind of escape. He’s disgusting and horrible and vile and should be called out for this big time.