Jewel & Ty Murray end marriage, will ‘recreate ourselves in the ashes’

Jewel

Jewel broke onto the music scene when I was in college, and I remember spending evenings studying while listening to “Who Will Save Your Soul?” on repeat. I lost track of her when she went “glam,” and she’s since become a very successful country singer. Jewel married world champion rodeo cowboy Ty Murray in 2008. They have one child together, a nearly three year-old son named Kase. Now they’re getting divorced. It might not seem like huge gossip news, but Jewel has posted a letter on her website that is … wow. The letter may seem a little TLDR, but I’ve actually cut a few paragraphs. As a divorce announcement, this is kind of amazing. Jewel fancies herself a poet, and she’s gonna tell us all about her split in epic fashion.

Dear World. It is infinitely strange to write those words, especially considering the personal nature of the topic, which is the purpose of my writing today. But the truth is I have lived my life in the public eye since I was nineteen. And while it is intimidating to live a life in the public, it has also been a privilege to make a living with my words, my thoughts, my feelings … Which brings me to this highly personal announcement today. My husband, friend and partner of 16 years and I have decided to get a divorce.

Ty and I have always tried to live the most authentic life possible, and we wanted our separation as husband and wife to be nothing less loving than the way we came together. For some time we have been engaged in a private and difficult, but thoughtful and tender undoing of ourselves. Allowing ourselves the time and space to redefine what we are to each other with love rather than malice.

We have been so aware that it is easiest to use the inertia of anger to leverage two souls apart who have been bound together by so much living. By a child. But we did not want anger to burn the ties that bound us. Instead we have chosen the much more difficult task of undoing ourselves stich by stich, and releasing each other with love so that we may take on our new form: dear friends and devoted co-parents of our beloved son Kase. We have no desire to damage ourselves and each other in the process. Who better than each other to bear witness to the heart ache of redefining our family? And who better as ally, while we learn to redraw ourselves in whatever new shape we find as separate people who are still striving to be the best versions of ourselves- as humans and as parents.

Oddly the very thing that Ty and I sought in coming together is the very thing we seek in separating. We both value growth. And growth became tragically and undeniably stifled as a couple, and we believe we can find it again in setting each other free. We truly believe we can find greater happiness apart than together, and this is why we are taking the enormous and heartbreaking step of divorce.

I share all this with you because I wanted you to hear it from us, instead of the tabloids. I also share it because I have learned in these 20 years of living my life honestly in front of you, to trust that you will all honor and have reverence for how difficult this journey is, and allow us our process as we not only grieve the loss of our marriage, but also as we recreate ourselves in the ashes- for from all death we trust a phoenix rises.

Lastly, a message from us both: 

”Our dedication to our son is unwavering and we are both committed to being the best partners in raising our son. Due to the spirit in which we have gone about this separation, we trust we can remain dear friends who hold each other in high esteem, which is so important to us as parents- as we wish only what is best for our son.” -Ty and Jewel

I want to lend a hearty note of solidarity to anyone reading this who may be struggling with similar issues in their own lives. Separating is a deeply difficult and personal decision. May you martial the courage to find whatever answer is best for you. – Jewel

[From Jeweljk.com]

This letter is a real fancy way to sum up Jewel and Ty’s divorce as “irreconcilable differences,” and she has really laid it on thick. I respect that they haven’t merely issued the usual celebrity statement about how “the split is amicable.” Jewel has admitted that there was plenty of anger in she and Ty’s initial separation. She did get a little artsy-fartsy with the whole “recreate ourselves in the ashes” and “from all death we trust a phoenix rises” stuff, but this isn’t nearly as pretentious as Goop’s “conscious uncoupling statement. Or is it?

Jewel

Jewel

Photos courtesy of WENN

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80 Responses to “Jewel & Ty Murray end marriage, will ‘recreate ourselves in the ashes’”

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  1. Kayl says:

    NOOOOOOO!

  2. MrsBPitt says:

    WOW….that is just…wierd! I appreciate that they are trying to stay friends for their son’s sake, but that announcement is cray, cray!!!!!!

  3. The Wizz says:

    No not as pretentious as Goop’s, but too bloody long. She looks cute though!

    • kri says:

      Thanks so much GOOP for your inspiring menthol-cool super-smooth Celeb Divorce Statement. Now every a-hole in H’wood is going to Deepak Chopra the fact that they can’t take each other’s crap anymore.

      • jenniferjustice says:

        *snort* hee hee

      • I Choose Me says:

        I might as well pack it up and go home. My day is officially done. Cannot.stop.laughing.

      • melain says:

        Agreed. Great..here we go. What’s next? Divorce ‘showers’ or ‘parties’ or some other ridiculous and disingenuous ‘celebration.’ FFS..file the paperwork and move on.

    • Chris says:

      I hear Chris Martin has started eating meat again now that he and Goop have split.

      • Hannah says:

        He was a vegetarian before they met. And her cook books are not all veg. It’s an urban myth that she is a vegetarian she probably was for 5 min like one of her many diet fads. Maybe he was the one who inspired the vegetarian phase.

  4. Eileen says:

    It’s too damn early for insane celebrity double talk-peace out

  5. Krista says:

    This bums me out. Does anybody else watch Alasak The Last Frontier? It’s about her family who are homesteaders. I feel like I know them, thus I feel like I know her. Sads.

  6. Kiddo says:

    tl;dr. Write a song instead, Thanks, The World.

    • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

      Basically the country ripoff of Goop. A “thoughtful and tender undoing of ourselves.” Etc. I’m starting to feel like I was such a bad sport about my divorce.

      • Kiddo says:

        Nah. You just weren’t full of it.

      • Jenna says:

        If you just did what you needed to do without hiring skywriters and limited your publicly issued statements to a few rants on Facebook or a night out with friends and some tequila shots…

        I think we all need to buy you flowers/candy/something. Because what the hades WAS all that horse hooey? Am I completely off base in thinking ‘write a song’ or ‘scream he’s an ass’ or ‘tell your best friend you keyed his car/threw his stuff out onto the law’ and then, hey, moving on is the non-surreal option?

      • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

        Jenna, were you spying on me? Lol

      • Jenna says:

        No spying, but if that was what it took to shake off a bad relationship and move on to hopefully far happier things? I’ll happily buy you a couple tequila shots anytime you want to keep the moving on, well. Moving on! Come to northern Ohio and I’ll happily pay up on the shots anytime. A good friend owns a bar, and my husband brews mead – whatever is your poison of choice! Or the flower/candy combo!

      • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

        Deal! I’ve moved on long ago, but a couple of shots of tequila never hurts!

    • Aussie girl says:

      Lol! I thought the same thing. Taylor swift wound get a whole album maybe two out of it.

    • Pandy says:

      LOL. I was only left thinking that it must have taken so long to unravel “stich by stich” because they needed to unravel stitch by stitch.

  7. Adrien says:

    At first glance, I thought they were Renee Zellweger and Kenny Chesney.

  8. Abbott says:

    Sounds like she may want the same type of attention the “conscious uncoupling” got? I dunno. Maybe celebs will continue to outdo each others divorce announcements to our benefit. Can’t wait for when Heidi and Spencer decide to “create an interpretive dance of the souls… by Cupid Shuffling away from each other into separate homes.”

  9. Jenns says:

    Jewel: “Dear World…”
    World: “Don’t care…”

  10. Ag says:

    did goop ghostwrite this?

    i also used to be into her music in college. good times.

  11. Sullivan says:

    Sure, it’s just as pretentious as Goop’s. Worse. It’s long-winded. If you’re going to be pretentious, be quick about it.

    • jenniferjustice says:

      She could have easily just released the one sentence about their careers being stifled together. That is the gist of it right?. To which we could point out that if career stagnation is the true cause behind their split and if they really hold their child as their number one priority then maybe one of them should take a temporary leave from their career. I mean which is she really saying is more important? To each their own but be honest about it.

    • DrM says:

      Yup it is. Read two paragraphs thought ” holy Jeebus batman…” And went straight to the comments lol

  12. Maria says:

    I got tired reading it, lord, thank you for cutting some out.

    Meh to them.

  13. Hautie says:

    So who got caught cheating?

  14. L says:

    After 16 years together, and 6 years of marriage I could see how one would want to write a epic about the end. It has to be hard.

    That said, next time please just write a song about it.

    • Tiffany says:

      I am with you. 16 years is a lot of life together. It must have been something big to not just talk separation but divorce. This is a bit sad.

  15. shannon says:

    Ugh, IMO more so. Who cares if we hear it from the tabloids first? I would expect to hear it from the tabloids first in Jewel’s case because I would assume that she didn’t care what we thought of her divorce one way or the other. In GOOP’s case, we all know that she’s a raging narcissict (sp?) and we EXPECT B.S. like that from her. I thought Jewel was above all that, but apparently not.

    • Jayna says:

      Because she has a fanbase that loves her from her music, poetry, or shows she’s involved in. Her long-term, solid relationship with Ty has been a part of what she shared for years, so I guess feels she needs to explain since it does come as a shock to most people.

  16. Really says:

    As a fellow Jewel fan from college, I think she is a great poet. I would often read her book of poems. This letter is who she is and I think it’s beautifully written. Makes me believe divorce doesn’t have to be this nasty thing.

  17. GoogleyEyes says:

    This letter is a little too long and artsy but my heart goes out to them. I remember seeing a Jewel + Ty special on tv a couple years back, the reporter visited them in their ranch. Their house was so beautiful. Both of them were so down to earth. They had cattle and Ty was very hands on in taking care of it. It looked like a fairytale. Retired couple enjoying a simple life together.

  18. danielle says:

    Definitely goopy.

  19. alma says:

    Can I be a grammar jerk and point out that “plenty of anger in she and Ty’s initial separation” is wrong? Well obviously I can and I am doing it. It should be “anger in her and Ty’s separation”. It really confuses me when native speaker get that wrong and I always assume that they know more than me and my ESL, but this time I am pretty certain I got it right.

    • sonalaceae (Nighty) says:

      Nope @alma, quite frequently native speakers make more mistakes than foreigners. Maybe because at school /institutes one is not allowed to make any mistakes whatsoever, whereas on a daily basis, one ends up picking up some “normal/ common” speaking faults…?
      I keep eyerolling at some native speakers friends of mine when they confuse “its and it’s” and things like that…
      But it should be “anger in her”.. I also noticed it immediately…

      • Savanna says:

        I love you both so much for this. I feel like I’m always the annoying b*tch who comments with the grammar correction.

    • Molly says:

      eh i dont care. I got the meaning. Life is too short to be pointing the grammar nazi finger at everyone. Its certainly not endearing.

  20. kpoodle says:

    In summary:

    Being married to a cowboy was boring. Jewel’s moving on. The end.

  21. MrsBPitt says:

    I loved Ty when he was on Dancing with the Stars…seemed like a nice, down-to-earth guy. I had high hopes that these two would be in it for the long haul. Oh well, seems like everyone gets divorced these days…

  22. Allie says:

    I didn’t know that she was a successful country singer.

    • jenniferjustice says:

      I have never heard her country career said to be successful. That was simply the interviewer flattering her. It is the only genre her music falls into and not very well. There is no obvious genre for folk music. I love my country music and I never hear anything by her on the radio. She held a spit as coach on the voice for a brief stint. That’s it.

    • Happy21 says:

      I was skimming to see if anyone questioned this as well. While she lived the country life and has a great voice for country I never realized that she was a ‘very successful country singer’ and I’ve listened to country music on and off for years.

  23. Savanna says:

    I think this is genuine. That’s just how Jewel writes. I see this as an authentic (although rambly) A-for-effort type thing instead of Goop’s annoying talking-down-to-the-peasants.

  24. Jayna says:

    Jewel is a poet. It’s the way she thinks and feels and expresses herself, very lyrical. She is about as genuine as you get, so I have to accept this as her way.

    What I don’ t get is how can you be together for like 13 years, then both want and decide to have a baby, and break up three years later after 16 years together? Wouldn’t you know by 13 years before having the baby if your relationship is solid or not? I could see this if it was a few years into the relationship and getting pregnant, but this I don’t understand. Oh, well, at least it sounds like they will still be good parents together even though divorced.

    • Molly says:

      I don’t get it either. My grandparents used to say if it were socially acceptable they’d probably be divorced 10x over by now during the hard times of their marriage but they were happy they pushed on and made it through to 60 years together.

      I always liked Jewel and they seemed cute together. No drama.

    • Sandra says:

      Well Jayna, I have a theory based on seeing this same thing time and time again…people tend to get divorced when the kids are between the ages of 2 and 6, because it’s a tough age range to get through. No one tells you how stressful kids are on a marriage, even when they’re good, sweet kids. People become lost to each other, because it’s all about the kids – which from my experience and what I have seen, it kind of has to be that way. It’s hard to connect with each other when a night out to have a date is costly, and the logistics, and you’re tired, and it’s stressful, etc. I’m always so sad to see these divorces happen, because unless it’s really and truly a crappy marriage, I think people will be happier in the long run to stay together. It takes real work to bring yourselves back together again, but it’s worth it. Been there! I’m thankful every day that we fought for what we remembered we used to have, and now have again. And please don’t say I’m preachy – having come from a divorced home, I know the other side of the blended families. Plus my husband is a great guy and totally worth keeping.

      • Mrs McCubbins says:

        Sandra

        I agree with your comment.

      • Judy says:

        I agree with everything you said. Someone asked me recently about my marriage of twenty one years and five kids and I said we could have divorced many times , but we just didn’t. I think it’s important to know at least one older married couple, it helps to put things in perspective. I know when I wanted to divorce, my single and divorced friends supported me but my older married friends really talked me down from the ledge. My husband is a great guy who is sometimes a jerk, but I’m sure I am too. Like you said He’s worth keeping. It does take real work to remember why you chose each other, and I’m grateful that I’m not a single mother now that I have four teens in the house. My husband and I are each other’s touchstone and we now cling to a vision of the future when these crazy kids will be sane again.

    • Ange says:

      I agree with Sandra but there’s also the possibility he was a band aid baby to begin with.

  25. Dena says:

    For some reason, they have always seemed strange to me apart & as a couple. I liked her early music, though.

  26. Marybel says:

    Countrified GOOP.

  27. Jaded says:

    “I want to lend a hearty note of solidarity to anyone reading this who may be struggling with similar issues in their own lives. Separating is a deeply difficult and personal decision. May you martial the courage to find whatever answer is best for you. – Jewel.

    P.S. At least now I don’t have to deal with the f*cking toilet seat left up, the cap off the toothpaste and your dirty gauchies all over the bedroom floor. Love you! Mean it! – Jewel”

  28. Mitch Buchanan Rocks! says:

    I’m disappointed we didn’t hear it from the tabloids first – the national enquirer article would surely have been more entertaining.

  29. Ginger says:

    How sad. As a divorced person I always feel for someone who is going through it. It’s one of the hardest things I’ve ever gone through. However, I don’t understand the whole “releasing each other with love” bit. As I said with Goopy’s announcement of divorce…this is the total opposite of my “uncoupling”. There were lots of screaming arguments and resentment. BUT we did come together afterward and forgive and are now friends again. We also always held the co parenting of our son as the most important thing then and now. We say to each other often that our son was the best thing that we ever made. So, whether you separate in a flowery way or a death match kind of way you can still come out okay in the end, Jewel. Just saying.

  30. PoliteTeaSipper says:

    I think this was a writing exercise to deal with her grieving. Sure, it’s flowery, but I get what she’s trying to say.

  31. taxi says:

    “martial” is not a verb. She meant “marshal.” Goop spells better.

  32. nikitab says:

    That. Plus he’s fug. Ok, now skewer away.
    I know I just emptied my karma jar but it had to be said.

  33. ojulia123 says:

    For reasons I cannot explain, he has always given me the creeps.

    • Jub-Jub says:

      Me too, plus the fact that he has made a career out of terrifying innocent animals makes him even creepier.

  34. Jenny12 says:

    What a Goopalicious statement…. I never get why people who consider each other partners and friends cannot work things out.

  35. Cinderella says:

    I just want to know who’s her new boyfriend.

    • Jayna says:

      She was recording an album in Nashville. Probably some quirky, kind of sexy studio musician.

  36. GreenieWeenie says:

    I dunno. This could be a good thing. I’m so sick of people going off about how divorce didn’t exist before Roe v. Wade and whatever other political nonsense they can dream up. At least this shows that people actually put some thought into it. I’m a fan of dispelling stupidity. This could contribute to that.

  37. Quincy says:

    But who will save her soul?

  38. Adele Dazeem says:

    Jewel’s statement made me barf. I wish the next celebrity couple to divorce would just release a statement that says, “It is with a great sense of happiness and relief that we have decided to divorce. D-I-V-O-R-C-E. We are divorcing as we no longer want to be married to each other and we want to get on with our lives. We have no intention of remaining friends as, after 16 years together, we can no longer stand the sight and touch of each other, let alone be civil to one another. We would appreciate no privacy at this sensational time, as we are more than willing to talk to everyone about how vile we find the other person”. At least that would be closer to the truth for some.