Back in March, Kim Kardashian broke the internet (again) when she debuted her new blonde hair at Paris Fashion Week. It was not a good look. It was not a flattering look. The first version was apparently so dull and lifeless that Kim had to go into a Paris salon to get a better blonde. And even then, she dyed it back to brown-black after a few weeks. She later admitted that her hair was incredibly damaged after her blonde moment, and she was back to wearing a lot of wiglets, weaves and hairpieces. But at some point in her blonde moment, she posed for the cover of Vogue Brazil. These are those covers.
Kim memorably got the cover of American Vogue last year, and a cover for Vogue Australia earlier this year. This is her first Vogue cover as a blonde though. And of course, they did her up like Marilyn Monroe. The extreme closeup is unflattering – it’s too close, too plastic and her face has been too tweaked. It’s like your eyes can’t figure out if you’re looking at a real person or a cartoon, like Kim IS the uncanny valley. The second cover – Kim in the black turtleneck – is much better.
What else is going on with Kim? She and Kanye celebrated their first wedding anniversary on Sunday, and surprisingly enough, they didn’t make a big spectacle of themselves. I think they just stayed in LA and spent time together as a family. Weird, right? Of course, Kim was posting endless throwback photos from her wedding – go here to see her Instagram. A lot of those photos are never-before-seen, especially the photos from the pre-wedding celebration at Valentino’s mansion. There are some genuinely nice photos!
Vogue Brasil pic.twitter.com/8feqO5eHab
— Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) May 26, 2015
Photos courtesy of Vogue Brazil.
Her nose and mouth area just looks so strange.
Her chin is long. She must have changed where she gets injections because the pointy chin is obvious.
Yes. It looks like she has a repaired cleft palate.
Her last nose job made her nose too short and now the space between her nose and mouth is too long
She once had a lovely face, but now looks non-human. She bought herself the face of a grasshopper.
It’s because she shortened her nose too much so now her upper lip is too long. Females have short upper lips genetically so when you see a long upper lip it’s usually because of a nose job.
+1. It’s ironic that she probably wanted a more ‘girly’ looking nose yet the shorter nose is making her philtrum and lower face look long – both masculine traits. She now looks more dudeish in the face. Her natural slightly hooked nose suited her much more.
Agreed, and her eyes are so vacant.
Definitely tragique!
She’s looking more and more like an ape. No offence to apes of course.
It looks like parts of her face have been rubbed out.
She looks like a camel.
Poster child for keeping plastic surgery in check. Botched.
Definitely. And now her much younger sister is messing with her face and body. I can’t imagine what she will look like by the time she is Kim’s age.
They should have put a tupperware container on the front cover because that’s what we are looking at folks. Plastic
no bueno.
In brazilian portuguese, péssimo.
Terrível!
And to think that she wasn’t even ugly to start.
I watched the E! Show were Bruce is talking about his transition. Kim was genuinely nice to him but then when talking to her sisters about her mom she starts to cry for what her mom is going through. That is when I saw what we know but I haven’t really seen in full effect —– when she CRIES she looks like a freak. Nothing, I repeat nothing moves and her Lips look huge and FAKE and so wrong!!!!!
She really has done too much too young and it was sad bc they showed her in high school and she was so naturally Pretty!
@BARRETT I watched that too and I thought my screen froze. Her face literally doesn’t move. It’s too bad b/c she had awesome cryface pre-botox.
she’s totally overdone it. I got Botox for awhile when I could afford it around my eyes. I don’t think anyone had a clue, no one mentioned anything, and I work in a very competitive field where they will do anything to cut you down. I still looked normal and like myself. she is giving it a bad name.
@Barrett – LOL yes! I have to admit that I kept rewinding and pausing over and over again because I was both horrified and amazed at what has become of her face. It’s sad, but it’s also hilarious. She really looked like something subhuman when she was crying. Her eyes are pulled so tight and she has made her nose so small, it’s crazy!
Kim’s a two-faced liar. She sides with Bruce because she sees popular opinion is on his side and then has a chance to make it all about her.
She also never broke the internet nor is she Monroe esque.
@Mare you’re so right. If popular opinion was against transgendered people, that’s the side she would be on.
Not Hot!
What happened to her arms? I do understand fore-shortening (sp?) and the fact that black obscures details, but something else went wrong here. I’m surprised this shot was acceptable.
Chemtrails.
Winner!
I just spit out my seltzer. Damn you!
Enough with the Marilyn Monroe covers.
I like Dlisted’s description: “Kim Kartrashian looking like the toilet baby of Courtney Stodden and an alien Real Doll on Vogue Brazil.”
This is no where near a Marilyn Monroe cover.
Love the DListed description, apropos. And certainly not Monroe. More like an olive-complected drag queen dressed as Jayne Mansfield. That said, the Jayne I described would look fabulous, not desperate like this stupid Vogue cover.
She looks like someone else, but I’m drawing a blank. Which, coincidentally, is always her and her sisters’ expression, BLANK. You can look at her and say she’s objectively attractive, but there’s something huge missing. She’s made herself into a caricature of what a sexpot would be, and yet somehow she just doesn’t come across as ‘sexy’, IMO. She is devoid of that certain je ne sais quoi.
She’s had so much work done, Kim doesn’t have a very feminine vibe. I think she looks like a guy in drag. (No offense to drags intended.)
She looks like a guy in drag because the plastic surgery has thrown the proportions of her face off.
She has all the charisma of a mannequin.
You hit the nail on the head.
I thought she was Rita Ora for a sec
Seriously thank you. You have so eloquently summed up my feelings about Kim. She is a caricature of what a sexpot should look like but nothing about her is sexy. It is that whole argument about the authentic self and how is it so obvious if you wear a mask (in Kims case that is an almost literal interpretation).
They both look horrible. She use to annoy me, now I just think she’s tiresome.
At DM the other day they had pictures taken of Marilyn by a longtime friend/photographer of hers. They were shot weeks before her death. Photoshop didn’t exist. It was just Marilyn, beautiful and sexy, which made her the icon women have tried to copy for decades. She’s gone over 50 years and is still relevant. I doubt this living blow up doll will be copied 50 years from now. At least I hope not!
Went to her Instagram and on a pic from Mothers Day 2weeks ago she wrote:
“Everything I will teach my daughter you taught me first”
NO PLEASE DON’T DO THAT. Don’ t teach adorable Nori THAT kind of stuff and behaviour. Give her a chance in life.
Seriously don’t! Poor Nori, guess this means there is really no hope for her 🙁
She will be taught to be a famewhore, get plastic surgery, lie all the time, live her life for paps and a tv audience, dress classless in clothes 2sizes smaller, be self-centered and #selfish, get peed on and make sure it is recorded and distributed 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁
Does this mean there will be a PMKim one day? If so, will Lucifer Homegirl allow her to use the Momager™ if she succeeds with the lawsuit?
She looks terrible blonde. Most brunettes do. Mother Nature knows what she’s doing most of the time. I think changing your hair that drastically usually fails because it doesn’t flatter your skin.
Yeah, overall I agree with you but I think there are *some* exceptions.
I’ve had my hair practically every color under the sun, but I’m a natural brunette–very dark brown.
I’ve found that my hair looks best somewhere in-between blonde and my natural shade. Right now it’s medium ash brown with ash blonde highlights and it flatters my complexion. Either super-light blonde or very dark brown tends to wash out my complexion.
Not that you asked about my hair but I thought I’d throw that out there. lol
An example: I’ve been watching Gilmore Girls and Melissa McCarthy had honey blonde hair when she was on that show and looked really gorgeous, better than as a brunette.
But yeah, Kim looks terrible as a platinum blonde. Honey blonde was far more suited her to her complexion, but really black hair is the best on her. I really think so much of it is how harmonious the hair color is with one’s skin color.
My best friend was blonde as a child, then her hair turned very dark brown. She looks much better as a blonde. So definitely, there are exceptions. I’m talking about someone like you going platinum or very light. Actually, now that I’m thinking of it, I just don’t love platinum on anybody that I can think of. Your hair sounds very pretty. I highlight my hair, too. My natural color is boring.
Ah you make a good point. I was actually blonde as a child. My hair is ok..it can be a bit crazy.
I think for most people, highlights can really brighten a person’s face.
I agree with you about platinum–not a huge fan as it is just SO harsh. I will say that the only time I’ve seen it look good is on extremely pale people with porcelain skin.
I don’t like any shade of blonde on Kim not even caramel. Khloe can pull off blonde, Kim can’t.
I am so sick of her. I hear that’s an app that blocks all things Kardashian. I’ve got to find it.
Please report back.
its called Kardblock and its real!!!
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR LETTING ME KNOW
In that top photo of the cover, she looks like Lady Gaga in one of her photo-shoots with her usual platinum wig styled looking like a budget Marilyn Monroe.
she is such an inspiration to young women everywhere. not every woman can go from rags to riches like Kim and look great doing it. She is so brave and courageous to rework her face from gorgeous to alien. so many props to you, Kim. here’s looking at you, beautiful, marilyn has nothing on you. you’re an inspiration to gold digging, vapid whores everywhere.
*sarcasm, just in case you didn’t catch it*
Good job. You covered everything.
thanks! : )
Kim always looks tragic! Ugh. The comparison to Marilyn is insulting to Marilyn. Marilyn’s been dead for over 50 years and we’re still fascinated by her. The only fascinating thing about Kim is that 50 years after her demise, she’ll still would look the same as she does now…PLASTIC. Just like plastic garbage bags.
@Chrissy – I agree with everything you said. We have Ricardo Tisci to thank for the Marilyn comparison–he said it and now she is constantly referred to as this generation’s Marilyn. It’s far from true and it really is insulting to Marilyn.
Its also insulting to us – expecting that we would buy it! She’s horrid.
Kim, can you tell us about con trails? Do they cause conturing marks on your abdomen?
Tragic.
Her face is just so plastic. A shame, because she was actually pretty.
I think she looks pretty.
I can’t imagine what Kim will look like in 10 years, but hopefully. Celebitchy will be here to show us! I’m actually curious as to what she’ll do to her face in the coming years.
Tragic. Tragic. and did I mention, tragic? This delusional thing here.
She’s starting to look like a blow up sex doll. But more plastic.
Why is there so much space between her nose and mouth. Look at a photo of her when she was presurgery. She was a beautiful natural girl so sad.
She is just a tragic person. She will be even a worse mother than Kris because she didn’t give a crap what her kid was named as long as she got her push present. Kris had her on birth control by 14 so North will be about 12. I wonder if KanYe will be slapping the dude on the back for getting in there early like he did with Tyga and Kylie. Poor kid of theirs does not stand a chance in hell to be a normal person.
She gave herself a short little pig nose. Ugh.
Tyra would say, “There’s no neck in these photos!!!”
my favorite comment. She’s no RuPaul, either. That girl is fierce.
That nose job(s) is tragic!
I swear ….she looked live the devil spawn of Karl Lagerfeld when she was blonde.