A few weeks ago, Meryl Streep was asked point blank if she identifies as feminist. Her answer, to the BBC, was infuriating on so many levels, not least of which because she began by saying, “I’m a mother, you know? And I am the mother of a son and I’m married to a man. I love men…” The fact that some women – women who fight for women’s equality, women who walk the walk every day of their lives – still have to couch their feminism or equality-belief system in terms of “I don’t hate men” is infuriating. And every time a woman equates feminism with “hating men,” you know who wins? Misogynists. Patriarchy. The conversation is being driven off the rails every time a feminist has to stop a discussion about equality because the feminist is worried about how the men feel, or whether the conversation sounds too “man-hating.”
So, with that rant out of the way, here’s what Laverne Cox and Emma Watson have been working on:
#ILoveMenButHatePatriarchy. Our new hashtag brainstorming with @EmWatson
— Laverne Cox (@Lavernecox) October 28, 2015
@EmWatson the logic behind #ILoveMenButHatePatriarchy is an indictment of the system of patriarchal oppression and its values not of men
— Laverne Cox (@Lavernecox) October 28, 2015
@EmWatson folks of all genders can uphold patriarchal systems &values or find ways to resist & the spaces between #ILoveMenButHatePatriarchy
— Laverne Cox (@Lavernecox) October 28, 2015
@EmWatson disagreement is cool. The hashtag came out of some brainstorming. Choosing to share something is process encourages dissent
— Laverne Cox (@Lavernecox) October 28, 2015
I know Laverne’s heart is in the right place and I’m honestly not mad at her or anything. I just think Laverne is spending too much time and energy STATING THE F-CKING OBVIOUS. Emma Watson’s He For She campaign received some similar complaints too, that Emma and the campaign were focusing too much energy on trying to make the “feminist” label more palatable to men, almost as if the real message is “men are hurt by patriarchy too, let’s focus all of our feminist energy on the poor men!” So, I’m giving more hashtag options for Laverne and Emma:
#IamafeministandIdontcareifyouthinkIhatemen
#Feminismisaboutequality
#Onlybutthurtmisogynistsneedtheiregossoothedaboutfeminism
#FeminismmeansneverhavingtosayIlovemen
#Feminismdoesnotrevolvearoundmensegos
Photos courtesy of WENN.
Anything that Emma Watson is a part of can miss me. She made some annoying comment about how she is an intersectionalist feminist because she went to Botswana, when asked if she was a white feminist…… *eye-roll*
Hear, hear. Smug, not too bright and lacking any discernible talent (playing herself in Harry Potter doesn’t count).
Watson is pathetically shallow with her campaigns. She’s also not talented, so uses this faux-feminism to stay in the public eye because there’s nothing substantial about her career.
I can’t believe these famous people are distorting feminism to be about mollifying men’s egos rather that trying to promote equality.
I like this one best: #IamafeministandIdontcareifyouthinkIhatemen
What about:
#idonotneedtoauditiontomenformyfeminismtobeacceptable
Nah. Not long enough.
Love the hashtags. Plus
#idontneedyourapprovaltohaveanopinion
What about:
iwassodesperatetogetatonedthatismokedthehashtag
Next>>>
This reminds me of the suffragette song in Mary Poppins for some reason.
“Although we adore men individually, we agree that as a group they’re rather stupid.”
That should be the new hashtag.
That pretty much sums it up for me.
A timeless feminist anthem – well done, sister suffragette!
Now put those things away, you know how the cause infuriates Mister Banks. 😉
Perfect.
That’s just perfect.
I don’t get what’s so complicated about understanding feminism??? I even asked my husband, who’s 1/8 caveman, if he was a feminist and he said “yes!” I was slightly shocked and delighted. I asked him if thought feminism means “man-hating” and he said “no”. If he gets it, there is no excuse for these women out there…cough**Meryl Streep** cough.
It’s complicated because what it is in theory is different from what it is in practice. It’s a bit like communism in that it’s fine on paper, but incredibly messy in reality because it attracts all the wrong people.
Hashtags need to be short and snappy to gain momentum.
This is getting obnoxious.
These celebrities spout feminism around but don’t actually do anything for the advancement of women. I don’t hear any of them up in arms about Republicans in this country trying to take away our reproductive rights? I don’t see any initiatives created by these celebs in the US that actually make a difference.
This is just self serving bullshit.
Big yup. I think they mean well but a hashtag is no substitute for the real-world power the Republicans hold in the US Congress and the Republican candidates (such as they are) are trying to attain. Uphold the Constitution. Fix the laws and enforce them.
I agree. They mean well but a Twitter conversation or tumblr post is not enough. The bright side of this is that lots of young girls aren’t afraid to stand up for themselves and promote feminism now that we have so many people bringing it into a positive light.
There are still imbeciles who demonize it but there’s hope especially in my generation. (I’m 19)
#ihatehashtags
#realmendontrape
I feel like feminism is the new lifestyle website. Everybody wants in on the action. That’s great but when the people who actually have a voice are not educated on the subject … eh. Not talking about Laverne specifically but in general, it feels like someone’s trying to kill feminism by asking celebrities about it. It’s a bit like asking me about the recent economic development of the BRIC countries. I know the basics but good god, don’t try to have some sort of deep discussion with me.
This is how I feel too, leave the celebs alone, most don’t have a serious education let alone have they read feminist works and been able to really give a good perspective. That being said I don’t agree with many internet sentiments about what feminism is anyway. People mock feminists because they go online and get bombarded with feminism a la tumblr (maybe they really feel like they get a grasp of what feminism, but not everyone has to agree with it). One of the comments above says that celebs spout feminism and don’t actually do anything, well I don’t see tweeting “CRUSH THE PATRIARCHY IN YOUR HEELS!” or “STOP SHAVING YOUR LEGS! as being too useful either. As long as these people are around I can’t help but feel like feminism won’t be taken seriously, its one thing to talk about sexism in the work place environment and a complete other to berate someone for dressing their toddler up in a gender role conforming colour.
Feminism is the new hot topic. On the red carpet you no longer ask celebs what dresses their wearing (though thats what the majority of people actually are interested in), you ask them if they’re a feminist. If they say they are you criticize them, if you say they aren’t you still criticize them. Feminism is just the shiny trend right now, especially with celebrities. But remember just because someone’s voice is louder than yours, just because other people can hear it more readily, does not mean they’re right or that you have to agree with them.
The point is that keyboard activism whether it’s on Tumblr or Twitter, doesn’t get anyone far.. That’s the bottom line. Celebrities can bring something to light because people will listen but taking action will actually make a difference.
Geena Davis is making strides with her film organization/festival, Amy Poehler has Smart Girls… I’m sure there are plenty of people doing these things but the point is to not just speak but do.
Yea Angie but not many people give two licks about what Geena Davis is doing. They want young and hip and thats why you hear more from younger actresses and singers.
It’s remarkable how the oppressed have to tiptoe around to not “offend” their oppressor. With all that men perpetrate upon women worldwide, I don’t think I have ever noticed that men are being concerned about offending, demeaning or hurting women.
Come on, men aren’t oppressors. That kind of talk is so counterproductive.
Ha, your statement is proving my point.
And yours proves the point of those who say feminism is just about man-hating. Counterproductive.
*side-eye*
We must never acknowledge the ways that men benefit from systematic oppression of women. Just like one must never acknowledge the way that white people benefit from the systematic oppression of non-white people. Cuz it’s counter productive!
acknowledging that men globally and historically oppress women, which is totally obvious, does not mean feminists hate women. Jeez.
*Sigh. I will be using Laverns hashtag.
I wish we could pretend that the term feminism isn’t considered toxic by the vast majority of people (men&women). I wish we could pretend that we can leave behind the misguided and still accomplish real change. The truth is we CANT. As long as the quickest way to discredit an idea is to declare it “feminist”, we are not winning. We HAVE lost many women and potential male allies to the misinformation and disinformation out there regarding feminism. And we will continue to hemorrhage support if we don’t address the brand. Ten years ago, I would have said #f*ckthesefools, now I can see that this inadvertently plays into the opponents hands. We should be trying to win hearts & minds, we do that by refuting the other sides propaganda.
Personally, I refuse to give in though. Because that’s an age-old strategy and I refuse to let them succeed. You take your opponent’s language and symbols and use those against them. You can see it in politics, you see it in social and civil rights movements. People have succeeded in branding the term feminist something it isn’t and when you give in, they keep going. You end up having to explain yourself all the time and it draws focus away from the issue. I will keep using the term feminist to describe myself unapologetically. Others may disagree and that’s fine, they can fight that particular fight. But I don’t see why we should let them have it.
Playing at respectability politics is a losing game if you ask me.
The argument regarding “respectability politics” reminds me of the fight against colonialism in my home country. Long story short – two factions, one standing on principle refusing to “coddle” the settlers and as a result being branded “militant and terrorist” and the other faction making political overtures to white settler communities to win moderate minds. Guess which faction succeeded and which one was dessimated? In America this same tension played out in the civil rights movement between Malcolm X and MLK. MLK was often written off for playing at respectability but he took a long term view and its his legacy rather than Malcolm X’s that lives on.
Don’t think it doesn’t pain me to say this, I grew up a Malcolm X, Che Guevara type of girl but its time to be practical. If feminism is being conflated with misandry by the majority of people, we HAVE to fix that. If twitter hashtags is how 20 year Oldsmobile learn these days, then lets hashtag this sh*t to death.
Hmm, my reply is stuck in moderation ether for some reason…
I appreciate what you’re saying here, but this analogy isn’t a good fit for me. The battle for civil rights in the United States, for example, removed LEGAL barriers for people of color, but it didn’t abolish racism – the underlying premise that upheld those barriers for hundreds of years. Racism is still a thing, and the people of color engaged in the ongoing fight against it can’t win by putting on their Sunday best and politely requesting that racists acknowledge and honor their humanity. Because that doesn’t work. And the same can be said of misogyny.
I agree that all social movements must be aware of branding. But if modern feminists are going to fine tune our message, let us focus our efforts on reiterating what feminism IS instead of giving credence to what we KNOW IT IS NOT. Feminism is about the social, economical, and political equality of the sexes. That’s it.
All of this, Naya. A refusal to play politics is a refusal to win.
Um, Kaiser, notice Emma didn’t reply or RT any of those tweets, it seems that Laverne is having a one-sided conversation?
You mention Emma having an active part in making that hashtag, but from her side it does not seem like it?
Like Jessica Valenti said: it wouldnt matter if feminists hate men
Yes!!!! Love it!!! Love those hashtags!
When people ask me if I’m a feminist I say “hell yeah, I’m a massive feminist”, and actually I say “I’m a massive feminist” all the time without being asked. Anyone who them insinuates that I must hate men just gets an eye roll from me.
Men are hurt by the system as well. Let us not forget that in America our fastest group for suicide is middle aged white guys. It is literally killing them because the system is one filled with intolerance for deviation from a cookie cutter standard of woman and man. The system has trained them that they are not to show or have weakness, “effeminate” feelings, or mental illness and certainly not to need help about such things. They will not seek help and I have heard many women complain about “effeminate” men. The white male patriarchal system is broken and fails everybody.
yes!!! this!!! there is no such thing as a job that is too feminine for men to do.
Yep, this.
It’s also a tool of capitalism, this myth of the self-reliant macho manly man who doesn’t need anyone’s help and can succeed at anything on his own. The myth of masculinity arose at precisely the same time, and for the same reasons, as capitalism took hold. It’s interdependent with misogyny, classism, racism, ableism, homophobia, etc.
There’s this current idea among young feminists that you can just focus on women and forget men entirely. That doesn’t work.
Love your hashtags!
#IamafeministandIdontcareifyouthinkIhatemen
#Feminismisaboutequality
#IDontNeedAMovementToKnowWhatIStandForTalkToMe
The people I’ve seen and talked to who shy away from feminism because they think it’s about hating men are ALL girls and women. My whole life, since I was in middle school, this is how it’s been.
So this is not about men, or trying to appease men, or trying to draw men in. It’s trying to reach out to girls and women who have been taught that feminism is about hating men.
And you know, there is actually a big “misandry” movement these days on the left (especially Tumblr) that’s utterly foul and needs to stop. I do, in fact, care when someone says if they have a child who’s a cis boy, they’ll beat him so that he stops being one — yes, that is something I’ve seen someone say. These people exist, they are not as rare as we like to pretend, and I bet Laverne Cox has had run-ins with them. It is important for ANY group to stand up and say, “I do not approve of anyone spreading hate in my name.”