Kate Walsh went through early menopause: ‘I don’t know if you can have it all’

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Kate Walsh, 48, was on Maria Menounos’s Sirius radio show last week, where she opened up about the fact that she went through early menopause and was never able to have kids like she wanted. It sounded kind of sad the way she described it, especially when taken in context of her previous comments about really wanting kids but feeling like a loser for not being able to have them. Kate got divorced in early 2009 after being married to Alex Young for about a year and a half. They jumped into marriage after just seven months of dating and it unsurprisingly didn’t work out for them. It sounds like she has some regrets but is philosophical about them, realizing that she focused on her career when it was still an option to have kids, and wondering aloud if anyone can have it all anyway. Here’s more:

Kate Walsh is opening up about going through early menopause, which she says closed the door on her having children.

“I don’t have children. I’m not going to have kids. I went through early menopause. That happened,” Walsh said on SiriusXM’s Conversations with Maria Menounos Wednesday.

Walsh, 48, says going through early menopause is becoming “more and more common” for women.

“Who knows why. It could be a product of our environment. The pill, we don’t know,” she explains.

After Walsh’s older sister went through early menopause, she advised the actress to get checked. Although Walsh had her doubts, she agreed to make an appointment.

“It was bleak. But that was a great kind of experience and growth,” she says. “I’ve always felt I’ve been, at times in my life, indecisive or have hard times making decisions. I go for what I want and I also embrace what’s in front of me.”
The Grey’s Anatomy alum also spoke about the notion of a woman “having it all” — both career and children.

“I don’t know if you can actually have it all. I think that is actually this American myth. I wouldn’t call it a dream,” she says. “I think it’s a bit of a myth in that it’s this huge pressure. We’re like, ‘Wait a minute, am I less than if I’m not a mother? If I’m not a rock star in my career?’ I don’t know. I’m just rambling. This is what I ponder.”

[From People]

I just feel for her and realize that I’m not looking forward to going through menopause. I’m 42 now, it’s something that may come a couple years from now or in a decade. At least I have a son, I’ve only ever wanted one child, and don’t care about that door being closed to me. I do worry about the physical issues and hot flashes, though. My mom had them for over ten years after she went on hormone replacement therapy and then tried to get off the medication. It doesn’t sound easy or convenient at all, but we all have different experiences.

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64 Responses to “Kate Walsh went through early menopause: ‘I don’t know if you can have it all’”

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  1. Mimz says:

    Sad… her character in Grey’s/Private Practice was struggling to conceive and it makes me sad that in her RL she wanted kids but kept on postponing it…
    I’m about to turn 30 and my friends either have kids or are trying, and have been for a long time.
    I don’t even have a boyfriend to even consider, but I worry about it. Especially because I am not yet sure that I want kids…

    • Lindy79 says:

      Don’t worry, honestly. Its the kind of thing you don’t know how it’s going to happen until you start trying (if that’s what you decide you want) but honestly, a lot of my friends have had children in the mid – late 30s so please don’t listen to the scaremongering you’ll hear. I say that as someone who is 36 this year and though it’s early days it happened quite quickly for us.

      Go enjoy your life and be happy x

    • Susan says:

      I was the same as you. I didn’t even WANT kids til I hit my late 30s. I was fortunate in that I was able, even past 40. For what it’s worth I’ve had as many friends struggle with fertility in their 20s as their late 30s and early 40s. Long story short, age is a factor in infertility but certainly not the ONLY factor. My unsolicited advice is live your life and make decisions based on when YOU are ready. Ignore the pressure and the hype.

    • missionintherain says:

      I got married at 32 and I had 4 miscarriages between the ages of 33 and 38. I have two wonderful children who were both conceived through fertility treatments (both insemination followed by heavy doses of progesterone to support the pregnancies). I didn’t always know for sure if I wanted kids until I started trying and losing them. At that point, I knew for sure. I’m now 44 and perimenopause began for me about a year ago. I don’t want to stir fear, but I can assure you that those fertility clinics are packed with women in their 30’s. Every time you see a celebrity in their early 40’s having children, please keep in mind that we don’t know how many treatments/how much time/how much money all of it cost, or even if the female was able to use her own eggs. I say all this not to upset anyone, but to relay my experience and observations. While I do think it’s very important to have a father figure (a great one) for a child, marriage doesn’t always show up in time. A wonderful uncle, a young and involved grandfather…Women are limited by time, whereas men are not. I don’t know that it’s totally necessary to wait for marriage. I thank God for fertility treatments. You have options:)

      • Truthful says:

        “Women are limited by time, whereas men are not.” –
        Not true- men are also limited in time…whenever you see an older male celebrity with young spawns, you can wonder just as much, how many treatments he had , how much time money he had put into it, and even if it’s his own sperm… We do know now that men’s fertility decreases greatly after 42.

        For the rest you also have just as much women who don’t need all these treatments getting pregnant well into their 40s.

        Fertility clinics are not a god example on the whole population … because they are packed with people having fertility problems… not matter what age they are.

        In my country 17 % of women have their first child at 40 (without help or treatments).

        The best testimony on biology are the old birth register from late 19th century/ early 20th: with no birth control women get pregnant till the very end of their fertile years… not just some, most of them…

        Ps: source, my dad whom fertility is his job.

      • JaneFR says:

        @Truthful : Where are you from ?
        I never looked at the statistics, but I would never have imagine that. 17%, almost one for five women having their first child at 40 seems a lot. It make sense, years in uni, years to build a career,… but still.

        EDIT : Just saw below that you’re from France too. Those statistics are even more interesting for me now.

      • noway says:

        Statistics are just statistics. Doesn’t mean that your individual life will follow the norm. At some point you will probably be the outlier, you just don’t know what for. Kate is a bit of an outlier with her early menopause, but at least she had a bit of a warning with her sister. Sometimes a heads up helps a bit. It is interesting though with pregnancy statistics the women get all the blame if they can’t get pregnant when I think statistically it is almost even between men, women and unknown. I know we have a lot of celebrity old dogs who have kids, but we do have some older women celebrities too Halle Berry, granted not in their senior years, but is that really a good idea anyway. The outliers are always interesting.

        I know this is sad but I kind of agree with Kate. I think for the vast majority of us having everything all at once just isn’t really feasible. I know some do, but I think life is a bit easier if you realize that your life goes in phases and at certain times you are more career focused or family focused and if you do not get the family you may have wanted you learn to accept it.

      • Mimz says:

        I am so sorry for all you’ve been through and am happy for you because you won that hard battle. I am aware that every woman is different, and statistics say from 30 we need to really worry. I am celibate for 4 years, and it hasnt been easy but such is Life.
        Also, fertility treatments are extremely expensive on my side of the world (southern africa) although “cheaper” options are available. But insemination and all that isn’t and we need to go to our neighbour countries to get it done.
        Also, I was always pretty obsessed with having safe sex so i 100% of the time used condoms, and never took the pill (except when i was younger, for a month, to try to fix my period), but I have the factor of being overweight. 2 years ago i had a year with only 6 periods (once every 2 months) and i was severely depressed, overeating all the bad stuff and severely overweight as well.
        So yes life is a bit better now, but I know all these things will still take some time. I hope by 32 I will be sorted, have a man and maybe try to start a family, but at this stage in my life i cannot even consider having a kid because I couldnt afford it. I can barely pay my own bills so…
        Anyway, wrote a journal, but it was good to put it out there and actually say it.

        I am aware of the years going by and i am not planning to delay it, but i need to really know if i want kids or not, and soon. So I can live with my decisions.
        My mom and my sisters were pretty fertile, but I know my mom had to do some treatment to have us and so did my middle sister, but nothing too hectic.
        So here’s for hoping!
        If in the end I cannot conceive, I can always adopt.

    • lylaoooo says:

      Mimz.. i´m at the same place as you… i´m 29 and no boyfriend.. all my friends are having children or have stable relationships… but I do want kids!

  2. als says:

    Those shoes are amazing and yes, I think some people have it all – because they are that lucky!
    Some don’t have it all because it’s not meant to be, I’m including myself here.
    Having it all it’s also about having opportunities, some just don’t have them.
    Of course, there are the opportunities that one creates through work and determination but they can only go so far.

    • Elisa the I. says:

      I LOVE those shoes. She is very pretty IMO.
      I personally can’t imagine working fulltime and having kids. Just thinking of it makes me feel tired. O_o

  3. Mrs. Darcy says:

    I’m 40, married but childless, and pretty sure I will go through early menopause because I had chemotherapy when I was 29 and my periods are ever weirder and lighter. It’s undoubtedly painful to feel the window closing, and that’s coming from someone who still hasn’t made up their mind about wanting children.

    • Me too says:

      Isn’t 40 a little bit late to decide if you want kids?

      • Truthful says:

        Coming from a country where 17% of women have their FIRST (this percentage doesn’t even consider the ones who are having their second or third…) child at 40 I say no, not all 40 isn’t late, it’s older but not late.
        Not everyone goes into early menopause…

        ps: my country being France

      • Casi says:

        Me Too, isn’t 7am a little early to be so harsh?

        To all the ladies out there struggling with any aspect of it, I wish you good health and peace with the outcome. ❤

      • Mrs. Darcy says:

        @ Me too: No doubt, but between 30-35 I was being told not to think about it because I had a very deadly freaking cancer that kills half of everyone who gets it (aggressive Non Hodgkins Lymphoma). Two to Five year survival is all anyone talks about, so that was my life. And the aftermath of that has taken me awhile to adjust to. (Walk a mile in my shoes…)

        I’m under no delusions that my window is closing if not closed, it doesn’t mean I don’t still have a right to think about it.

      • Truthful says:

        @Mrs Darcy: read my previous comment… Of course it’s not too late and of course you still have some time to figure out! Not all the time in the world, but some time. Harsh people are just unhappy people…don’t let their bitterness block the way to your possibilities 🙂 ! And you still have some 🙂

        ps:My best friend mom had his brother at 48 and she had some serious health conditions prior to that! So good luck Mrs Darcy 🙂

      • Susan says:

        Not at all. Had my FIRST at 40. Others followed. All healthy and happy. That is old school thinking.

      • Mrs. Darcy says:

        @Truthful: Thank you 🙂 I know there are maybe options still, I know I could adopt too, which I have definitely though about. I am aware that my window might be shorter than some people’s, and I am ok with it but fully admit I probably should have started thinking about this stuff before now too. Life is complicated and not smooth sailing or laid out perfectly for all of us. Thank you for being positive 🙂 xo

      • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

        Wow, Me Too. That was rude, unnecessary, unkind and judgmental. MrsDarcy was a little busy in her early thirties trying to stay alive. But that’s what happens when you judge someone without knowing what you’re talking about. You end up looking like an idiot.

      • Isabelle says:

        You can still get pregnant and have babies, its just harder to get pregnant. Have a friend that had all 3 of her very healthy children after she was 41, she didn’t marry until she was 40. Grandmother had my mother when she was 45.

      • Dromedary says:

        No. It’s not. You win a$$hat of the day award though… Okay that was harsh. Sorry, but as an infertile that’s a pretty judgy and mean thing to hear.

      • MoochieMom says:

        I have a ton of friends who had kids into their 40’s. I agree that it is insensitive. I have had 4 miscarriages after my daughter was born and am going to testing for a second time next month. I’ll be 38 in December and we want one more. My grandmother had my mom at 40 in 1951. My mom didn’t start menopause until she was 52. We aren’t doing IVF or anything like that but I would never hate on any woman trying to have a baby whether it is natural, IVF, surrogacy or otherwise. For those of us with problems keeping a baby (I apparently can conceive) it is hurtful.

      • paranormalgirl says:

        My sister-in-law just had her first child at 44. Like Mrs Darcy, she had health issues that put having children on the backburner.

      • Jwoolman says:

        The statistics for France may not transfer to the US. I was translating a European questionnaire and was amazed at how late the women reporting had started menstruating by USA standards. They were four or five years later than our typical figures. So I would expect menopause to occur later in such countries as well.

        Also the environment and food supply is quite different in Europe and so is the typical diet. We have some problems in that area that may be associated with many of our troubles with fertility and early puberty.

      • Truthful says:

        @JWoolman: I am sorry but are you sure you translated a questionnaire from France and not another francophone country?
        Because such questionnaires do not exist in France as medical informations are protected by our very strict privacy laws (so conducing studies by questionnaire are not really likely possible).Studies are conduced specifically and answers are not communicated through any ways (including translation) outside a limited study.

        Biology is influenced by lifestyle but not only, the 90 % of fertility depends on your genetic patrimony: every woman is born with an amount of ovarian follicules that is specific to her.
        There is only one year of difference , on an average , between the age of puberty in France and in the US (12 in France, 11 in the US).

        So France’s statistics can totally be transposed in the US: they are an indication of biologic fertility which is not that influenced by lifestyle .

        ps: my dad works in the field so I have access to very instructive information 🙂

        ps2: on an average the age of menopause worldwide is 51… so having a child at 40 is plausible as it is a good decade ahead of it

    • Lou says:

      My mother had me when she was nearly 42! My dad was 47! I’m 33 and both are still alive and relatively healthy! (and she had my brother at 39) . My school friend had young parents but sadly her dad died in a fishing accident when she was only 15.

      My sister had my niece when she was 41! It is definitely older, and truthfully i did always wish my parents were younger because in comparison to my friends they were significantly older. I remember being so shocked that my friend’s mother was only 39 when we were both around 13/14. My mother was 55 then! But now i find its so much more common to have an older parent/s that i don’t think kids really think about it that much! It’s definitely better not to leave it too late, but life doesn’t always line up perfectly! Do what you need to do!

  4. GoodNamesAllTaken says:

    To Mimz and MrsDarcy
    I hope you both get what you want in the children situation, but if you don’t, it will hurt, but you’ll be okay. Just wanted to say that. I know I have bored everyone to tears about my stuff, so I don’t need to repeat it, and it’s still something that I struggle with. But I’ve had a great life and you both will, too, no matter what. ❤️

    As for Kate, it is hard for any career-oriented woman to know the right time to have children, because, at least in the short-run, your career will probably suffer. That’s unfair, but I think it’s true from what I’ve seen. It must be even harder in a very youth-oriented field like acting, because you might think your profitable years are limited. I wish our society was more accommodating to women and children.

    • Mrs. Darcy says:

      Thank You. I know I will be ok, but it’s weird to think of myself as definitely childless. I am an only child so there is an essential inbuilt loneliness, an unspoken pressure from my Mom for her only shot at grand-kids, just a whole lot of baggage that goes along with not having kids. I’m sorry I don’t know your full story but I’m glad you are okay with where you are at. xo

      • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

        I didn’t mean to be dismissive of your feelings. I hope it didn’t come off as a “don’t worry about it!” I just meant that even though I desperately wanted a houseful of kids and couldn’t have them, I still had a good life. I will never love the fact that I didn’t have them, but I survived it, and I’ve accepted it. I hope that whatever you decide, you will get. You’ve been through enough.

      • Christin says:

        I am an only child who decided (after much deliberation) to remain childless. My window is now practically shut, and I am at peace with it. I do understand what you are saying about that innate loneliness of being an only child. I have also discovered (for me) an equal if not stronger sense of independence, too.

        I found that I can help children in need in other ways, and I plan to increase my involvement and support as my career winds down.

        And as for age — I knew a lady who had her son at 47. She was in a tragic accident as a schoolgirl that made doctors doubt she could ever have a child. She passed away recently in her mid-90s.

      • Mrs. Darcy says:

        @ Good Names: I didn’t think you were being dismissive at all, I get what you meant and appreciate your sensitivity and advice 🙂

        @Christin: That is really inspiring. I tend to put my charity/activism towards animals, which sometimes I do wonder if it’s just subverted maternal instincts. But it’s all good. Being an only child has its perks, but man does the grand kid guilt suck. My Mom’s youngest sister is on her fifth, I do feel inadequate sometimes on that front.

        I think I would be cool with being an older Mom if it does happen, it’s not so uncommon nowadays. I am glad you are happy with your decision, it sounds like you are doing a lot of good work for children in need and that is more than most people, mothers or not, do. xo

      • Christin says:

        Additional disclosure — I have several pets that are my children. That was my lifelong desire, to hands-on help unwanted animals.

        My parents never applied pressure about grandkids (though plenty of others did). My mother was diagnosed with RA after my birth, and caring for her was a big focus of our lives.

        I try to help sick/needy kids financially as I can, and really want to jump into doing much more. I look at it as being able to ‘choose’ my kids, if that makes sense. My Dad always said we have to play the hand we are dealt, so I try not to live with regrets.

  5. Jwoolman says:

    There are some less drastic things to try for hot flashes etc. before going to hormone replacement. For example, I think some people find extra Vitamin E is helpful. Googling will come up with more.

    I would advise losing any serious extra poundage before entering menopause, however, since it ain’t gonna get easier to lose weight afterward (to put it mildly) and your skin doesn’t become more elastic as you age (to adjust to smaller volume of stuff enclosed). Basically, try to deal with any health/fitness problems before it becomes harder due to hormonal changes and advancing age and that will probably also make the transition easier. Women especially often put off taking care of themselves because they’re just very busy taking care of others and other things. Despite myths, weight issues are rarely due to “laziness” and more often due to just the opposite, so a conscious effort needs to be made to carve out some time in the day for yourself (even just being able to relax and enjoy your food instead of dealing with too many other things at the same time can make a difference, in addition to getting enough sleep).

  6. Jwoolman says:

    If early menopause is becoming more common, that is undoubtedly related to increasingly early menarche. The two are related – if you start menstruating earlier, you will very likely stop earlier as well.

    • Esmom says:

      That makes sense. I am in my late 40s and I don’t know of anyone near my age who’s gone through early menopause. For a couple years I was thinking I was hitting the peri stage but my doctor says nope.

      So much menopause discussion here lately! 🙂

    • ell says:

      idk if that’s true. both my mum and my aunt had their period at 10 and didn’t go into menopause 52/54.

    • Isabelle says:

      This!!! We’re having our cycles earlier. If you start say around age 12 which is common, look for late 40s or early 50s.

    • Lucinda says:

      I’ve read somewhere (I can’t remember where now) that it tends to be the opposite. I didn’t start until 15 and at 41 I had my first hot flash. At 44 I’m full in perimenopause now and just waiting for it to end. My experience doesn’t prove that it’s the norm though.

  7. Mrs. Wellen Melon says:

    “We all have different experiences.”


    If you’ve had the hot flashes and mood swings and sleeplessness, hairy chin and wiry eyebrows and vaginal atrophy, women who find menopause easy, enjoyable, or however Angelina Jolie phrased it, can seem like they’re trolling.

    The important thing is that there should be no moral high ground assigned to any of it. No woman should be judged for the difficulty or ease of her menopause.

    If you’re suffering, please see a doctor. If you feel judged by your family or society because you are suffering, feel pity for their ignorance.

    • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

      Well said, Mrs. Wellen Melon.

    • WinnieCoopersMom says:

      Agree. Reminds me of the pregnancy discussions on here lately: easy vs horrible pregnancies and related weight gain/ bounce back afterward..we shouldnt compare or gloat. Everyone has a different experience.

  8. MrsBPitt says:

    Menopause doesn’t have to be horrible…we talked about this yesterday on the AJ thread. I went through a few months of hot flashes and night sweats, I was a little moody (hubby may disagree about the “little” part), but mine wasn’t bad at all. And I didn’t have any hormone replacement, just went thru it naturally. My sister had the same experience as me, even though our Mom said her menopause lasted years and years, and she felt hers was pretty bad. I think every women has their own experience, depending on many factors…I was very lucky…

  9. Shelley says:

    That’s sad for her. She seems like a lovely person.

  10. JB says:

    I feel for her. I’m 34 right now and in the very very very early stages. I feel like there are some contributing factors for me personally ( I have rheumatoid arthritis, for one thing, and that chronic inflammation can sometimes be related) but that doesn’t make it any more exciting or easier. I was fortunate to meet my husband young and get having children out of the way before I turned 30. There were times where I felt like I was crazy for doing all of that so young but now I’m grateful. You just never know what’s going to happen, you have to make the best decision for yourself at the time, and it seems like Kate is realistic and understanding of that toward herself. Hopefully, she is. I’m reading it that way anyway, a tone of acceptance.

  11. Cran says:

    I am 52 and look at my generation as having been born into an era where having it all meant marriage, career, children, affluence. Being Super Woman. The definition of having it all seems to have been redefined in my life. Now I feel that all is more what I define rather than what society deems it be for me. Again, I’m also old enough to have gained some experience and perspective. I am no longer 25 and I may have merely learned to listen to what works in my life as opposed to what society expects from me. I also count as a blessing the fact that I have received zero pressure from family other than to focus on having education and employment. Definitely expectations in that regard. Lol.

    In short it could be that I not societal norms have changed.

    • Christin says:

      @Cran — At a women’s career workshop I attended last week, the main theme was letting go (or not latching on to) society’s unrealistic (and hopefully fading) expectations of having or doing it all perfectly.

      Both the speakers and several attendees basically said what you did — that there is too much unrealistic pressure that we often recognize as we get older. Tune it out, do what works for you in terms of a balancing act, and don’t feel guilty about saying ‘no’.

  12. celine says:

    Although I feel bad for women who want to have kids and can’t, imho having kids is totally overrated. If I could live my life over again, I would have definitely not married or have a child, even though I love my only son deeply.

    • Esmom says:

      I think too many people have kids for the wrong reasons, that’s for sure.

    • ell says:

      i don’t know if it’s overrated, but it annoys me when it’s expected. like people have to and it’s not a choice.

    • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

      So many people tell me that, Celine. I think because I don’t have kids, they feel freer to say it. Even if they say they would still have kids, they tell me not to romanticize it because it’s constant work with a lot of heartache. The rewards are great, sometimes. Sometimes not.

  13. Lou says:

    She can adopt very easily as a wealthy woman so she can have kids if she wants to and surely she would have done so by now if she really wanted a child badly? It is probably the best option for Kate who doesn’t seem to ever be in a solid relationship.

    • MoochieMom says:

      Adoption isn’t easy, even if you have money and a perfect situation. It is a long process and things don’t always work out. I have friends who could not be more perfect for adoption but had to wait an additional 9 months because of visa issues. They had chosen a child before and another family had put in a request hours before. This was a special needs adoption and those tend to go faster. For a perfectly healthy baby with XYZ criteria…you wait. Again, it isn’t easy.

  14. Angel L says:

    I am 46 and I am post menopausal. I started Perimonopause in my early 30’s. I was also unable to have children although we eventually adopted from foster care (best thing ever!).
    Menopause wasn’t that bad for me. the biggest issues are chin hair -if the hair on top of my head grew as fast as chin hair I would be freakin’ Rapunzel!, and drier skin – oh and I could eat a peanut and gain 5 pounds LOL. My husband would say it was the mood swings but what does he know? LOL

    • JaneFR says:

      I had fertility problems and went a decade and half under one hormonal treatment or another. I thought that the weight cycling ( a biiiiiiig gain in the end, of course), the hair thing (sad dry head hair and lively chin hair), the breast thing (yes, one can have too much breast) and of course The Nausea (in the morning, the afternoon and the evening.). My ex always said the worst was the mood swings. Hum, was he maybe trying to subtly suggest that I was not a fraking sunshine 24/7?

  15. EN says:

    We could have it all if the society supported us.
    For working women having children is a big struggle.
    We just discussed it the other day on the Zuckerberg’s thread.

    In countries with maternity leave and better support of single mothers and more accessible childcare women CAN have it all. Just not in the US.

    • Celebwatch says:

      I think “having it all” is a horrible expression. So greedy! Typical of the U.S., and I say that as an American. It also induces competition, of which there is already too much among women.

      But making having children easier for workers of both sexes I totally support, at least up to two kids.

    • Truthful says:

      Agree. I am French and women are very much supported by society here: great maternity leave, ability to have access to affordable daycare (state founded) to be able to go back to work after babies, great health insurance and retirement plan, etc.

      The result is women never stop working and you are considered a woman, as in a complex not-just-a one-faced being your wholelife, not ” a mom” or a “pretty girl” or a “middle-age lady”, and being late 20s now I become to appreciate more and more that aspect of my country.

      Here ladies in their 50s and 60s are still considered as attractive and desirable or successful as individuals( Ines de la Fressange is 57 and she is still considered a great beauty and a successful , creative and interesting lady for example… and she is a mom of 2 but no one will resume her to just being that) to me it was a given but after almost a decade of studying/ internship/ travelling abroad I appreciate greatly this aspect of my country.

      Ps: of course a lot can still be made and I don’t see it all through pink glasses…

  16. Minxx says:

    I went through surgical menopause at 48 – definitely not fun as I had no menopause symptoms at all before the removal of my ovaries. I suppose natural menopause is a easier as your body has time to adjust to it but it’s still pretty awful. I can’t take HRT so I was left with only herbal and natural remedies. After trying many of them, I strongly recommend Red Clover extract. Took it for 2 years and it really took the edge off – I slept better and had fewer headaches. Hot flashes, as bad as they are, are not the worst part of menopause, trust me. But on red clover I was pretty steady emotionally, dind’t have so many pains and aches. ONe more thing: when you’re getting close to menopause, stop eating red meat, drink less coffee etc. I really cut down on meat and dairy for months before the surgery – that definitely helps as it reduces the level of estrogen in your body, so you drop from a lower level, feels less painful. More vegetables, natural foods and daily exercise help too.
    I feel really bad for all women who went though it prematurely, no matter what the reason.

  17. Gatita says:

    I’m experiencing perimenopause now and have been taking an antidepressant to deal with my hot flashes, headaches and other symptoms. It works really well and as a result the change has been fairly easy except for the unpredictable periods. If you’re suffering from menopause symptoms I would strongly suggest you speak with a doctor. There are a lot of different medications you can try besides hormone therapy.

  18. tracking says:

    I love her, wish she’d come back to Grey’s!!

  19. Pineapple says:

    Kate’s very likeable as a person. I’m no expert but I’m totally open to the idea of natural therapies and a better diet extending your fertility. Look up seed cycling, et cetera.

  20. CityGirl says:

    I went thru early menopause too – supposedly brought on by a chronic illness, massive medications and dropping substantially below my normal, healthy body weight. I tried herbal remedies, (black cohosh, english primrose, Macca etc) for years, and in increasingly higher and higher doses. I was (still kind of am) miserable: Hot Flashes; lethargy; depression; weight gain; menopausal arthritis (who knew??)…..my long time family practitioner was on the list of those who eluded to it all being in my head….
    Finally found a different doctor, went Hormone Replacement Therapy and after only 2 months, I am starting to feel better: hot flashes drastically reduced to almost -0- , depression not as all consuming, etc. Down side: a little more weight gain, and kind of expensive. All completely worth it. The weight will come off as soon as I drag myself to the gym regularly, and I’ve spent more money on dumber things…..