Brie Larson hasn’t spoken to her dad in 10 years: ‘He didn’t do himself any favors’

brie elle

I’ve started to think of Brie Larson as one of those styling-dependent actresses, much like Kristen Stewart. For women like K-Stew and Brie, makeup makes all the difference. They can look radically different with just heavy eye makeup. It’s the weirdest thing. For Brie specifically, while I think she’s very pretty, she also has that quality of looking like ten other actresses. I’m saying this because I’ve seen some pushback on Elle magazine for their March cover (featuring a subtle redesign), but I don’t actually think they Photoshopped the crap out of Brie. I think they just gave her heavy makeup (which we aren’t used to seeing on her), plus they used a photo with a weird angle of her face. Anyway, you can read Brie’s Elle interview here. Some highlights:

Meeting cool women during the awards season: “It was pretty much, like, Helen Mirren, Cate Blanchett, Saoirse Ronan, and me. Then Jennifer Lawrence came in for a little bit, and Kate Winslet, Carey Mulligan… You’re having meals together, and doing these roundtables—I felt like I was hallucinating. Most of those people I’d never met before, so it was like the moment when you’re not at the kid’s table anymore. Wow, not only am I sitting with these legends, but Kate Winslet saw me and ran across the room and grabbed me and with such a beautiful intensity said, ‘I am so f–king excited for you!’ I love her.”

She hasn’t spoken to her father in 10 years: “When legally I didn’t have to have visitation with him anymore, I jumped on it. As a kid I tried to understand him and understand the situation. But he didn’t do himself any favors. I don’t think he ever really wanted to be a parent. It wasn’t until truly recently that I realized that’s why so much of my work was so volatile. All of the stuff I wasn’t dealing with in my actual life—all of this anger, my fears and my vulnerabilities—I didn’t feel comfortable expressing because I felt like it was part of the human code that when we’re out in the public space, everyone’s perfect and good, and we’re all nice women, and we dress well and we brush our hair and agree with these customs.”

[From Elle Magazine]

I would love to know more about the situation with her father. It sounds very dramatic. It sounds… Angelina Jolie-esque. Like, Angelina has famously had a terrible relationship with her father on and off for decades. I’m guessing that Brie was able to cut off contact from her dad completely and stick with it, in a way that Jolie couldn’t because Jon Voight would go into interviews and passive-aggressively try to stick it to her. Of course, lots of celebrities have drama with parents: Jennifer Aniston barely speaks to her mother, Beyonce and her dad have issues, Lindsay Lohan is always fighting with one or both of her parents, Mischa Barton and Leighton Meester have taken out lawsuits against their moms, and much more.

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Photos courtesy of Terry Tsilois/Elle Magazine.

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69 Responses to “Brie Larson hasn’t spoken to her dad in 10 years: ‘He didn’t do himself any favors’”

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  1. Dtab says:

    As someone who hasn’t spoken to their dad in 16years, it takes a lot to be able to cut them outta your life. Brie was obviously aware that it was a bad situation and was able to remove herself from it. That takes a strong character.

    • SnarkySnarkers says:

      My dad makes it easy, he never calls or bothers to contact me or my sisters. My mom was “there” but not really. Her boyfriend and pot always took priority. As someone who is now pregnant with their first child, I will never understand how you can do that to your kids. I honestly think if more people made family a priority we’d have less crime in general. I know it will certainly be a priority for me and my husband. Bless all you adult kids who have crap parents! Keep your heads up and know that it’s not your fault!

      • Miss V says:

        Same here. My dad doesn’t care enough to contact me. My mom, when she was alive, cared more about alcohol and pills. I can tell you this… As a mother of three now… It makes you a better parent. It truly does. Sometimes it’s tough because yo find yourself overcompensating at times because you never had really parents. But in the whole grand scheme of things, caring too much and trying too hard is a good problem to have. I make sure that my kids never have one day where they don’t know they’re loved… Because I never had that. Good luck to you and your new baby!!!

      • SnarkySnarkers says:

        @Miss V – Thank you so much for the wisdom! I do think the overcompensating might be a problem for me but you are so right about it being a good problem to have ;)

      • DahliaDee says:

        Good luck to you and your family, may you be healthy and happy.
        I just think that people should be more careful and honest, and not have children if they are unwilling and unable to care for them. But then again stupidity, ignorance and carelessness seem to span the whole wide world.

      • JenniferJustice says:

        There is no such thing as loving your kids too much – unless someone is enabling an addict or something, but overall, I don’t think it’s possible to over-compensate with love. I had a crappy childhood. My parents were volatile. He was a cheating trucker and rather than leave and work to support us, my mom stayed and they fought violently off and on for about 14 years. Then she married the first dude she thought would take care of her. I dont’ say take care of us, because it was always all about her. That one molested me from 14 to 16 until I finally told. I told, but then I went off the deep end because she stayed with him. I got into drugs, a bad crowd, quit school, ran away numerous times. I was a mess. I found the courage to call my older brother when I knew he’d be home from college on holiday and he saved me. He literally met me at a park on the sly and took me up north to rest and get my head together with nobody knowing so noone could involve themselves or interfere. I slept on and off for days and went to live with my grandparents when he went back to college. I have often wondered where I would be had I not made that one phone call and had he not answered.

        We can never get our childhoods back, but what we do get is the opportunity to do it right with our own family. Marrying a good man and having my own child has been the most healing experience of my life. We get to give him everything we didn’t have and I dont’ mean material things. We give him stability, security, priority, love, guidance, and commitment. I beleive those of us who suffered as kids tend to be better parents because we know what it’s like to be pawns or treated as objects rather than people. I think some parents forget their children are actually people – not things they own to do with as they please.

    • NGBoston says:

      Dtab- Stay strong. It does take a tremendous amount of pride and self-esteem to realize—its NOT you or anything you did. It’s not YOU!

      It hurts my heart to hear so many stories of parents who have given up the chance to have some really beautiful and cool people in their lives to love and cherish forever.

      I will never ever understand it, entirely THEIR LOSS, not your own.

      You and others like you are an inspiration to all.

      =)

      • Dtab says:

        Thanks, I have two kids now and the one good thing he did give me is the knowledge of what makes a good parent….just do the opposite of what he did :)

    • Christo says:

      Good for her. As someone who hasn’t had contact with my father (married and had affair with my mother) in 21 years and my mother (gave me to my grandmother to raise) in 7 years, I am completely on board with her actions. The worst part of all of this is the nosy and pushy people from “good families” that try and try and try again to push one to “reconcile”—whatever that means to them. The fact remains that TERRIBLE PEOPLE that happen to be parents or family do not get a pass just because of genetics. All too often, the worst people to have in your life are the parents and family who, through their genetic and learned behaviors, continue to poison the well of future generations.

      • SnarkySnarkers says:

        @Christo – OMG so this all day long.

      • melodycalder says:

        Oh! The reconciliation kills me! I haven’t had a relationship with my mom in 10 years, but since my grandparents forgave her, everyone else has to too. I am going to be in town to see them on Monday, my grandmother isn’t doing well at all, and I can come over unless my mother is there too. He is being so rude, I think I’m going to skip it all together. I know myself and i can’t handle dealing with her without my husband but with my 3 year old, just a bad situation. Great for him forgiving what she did to her kids, so noble.

      • JenniferJustice says:

        Some people are toxic. Most of them are parents eventually. It only stand to reason that some parents are toxic and so, no, they do not get a pass because we share DNA. It’s sad to not have the picture perfect family like we think everybody else has, but we can find other people to mentor us, and fill those roles. For every time I get bummed that my parents are horribly selfish, trash-acting, abusive people, I remind myself how blessed I am to have had the best grandparents and older brother a girl could ask for. And because of them, I married a man very much like my grandfather and older brother. I wouldn’t change a thing – It all made me who I am and led me to the life I have now.

      • Antigone says:

        +1 @Christo! I’ve had people get offended when I say that my Dad is a jerk-they think it’s disrespectful. It’s frustrating because they have no idea what it was like to grow up with him. I haven’t cut off contact with him (we have a limited relationship) but I certainly have thought about it and would do so if things would deteriorate.

    • nora says:

      I ‘m 35 and it’s been a year since I cut ties with my mother and yet it’s been over 20 years that I dream and I tell myself that I must do it. I have great admiration for people who manage to do that very young. many people do not account how having an abusive parent is alienating

      • PennyLane says:

        I have a good friend who finally cut off contact with his mother when he was in his early 40′s after struggling with it for many years. One of his great regrets is not having done it sooner.

        Good for you for being able to make the decision to protect yourself.

      • Armenthrowup says:

        Love to all of you – my dad’s is an asshole – and I’ve yet to escape him. He’s mainly the reason why I don’t do relationships.

  2. Luna says:

    This girl really has nothing makes her different from other actresses. And the cover is so photoshopped

    • Mia V. says:

      I never know it’s actually her when I see pics, she doesn’t stand out. And also, she wasn’t really good in “Room”, the boy should’ve been nominated.

  3. aims says:

    The father comments really hit a nerve for me. I haven’t had any communication with my father in 18 years. The reasons are legitimate and he’s another one who shouldn’t have been a parent. I believe this from the essence of my being; just because you’re related to someone, it doesn’t give them the right to treat you terribly. You also have the right to determine who is good in your life and embrace them. Just because there’s DNA doesn’t mean they’re family.

    • mom2two says:

      This…I have not had a relationship with my bio dad for 20 years. My stepfather was more of a father then he will ever be.

      • aims says:

        My step dad has been a father figure and papa to our family . I have never felt a a step dynamic with him, just unconditional love. My children know papa is a step parent, but have never questioned about my bio dad.

      • NGBoston says:

        Yay to awesome StepDad’s !!! (Applause!)

    • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

      I’m sorry that your father was so disappointing, and I think you’re very brave to do what’s right for you.

    • NGBoston says:

      @aims- God Bless you, Honey and huge love and hugs your way. You are spot on.

      And remember, you are enough and you ARE loved. xoxoxoxo

  4. Josefina says:

    When it comes to family dramas I just avoid comments. Truth is they are the only ones who know what actually goes on.

    • friday says:

      exactly. if someone (famous or not) needs to have distance (or a total break) from their family, it’s their business. they are not obliged to expose the reasons, in order to gain third party approval.

  5. FingerBinger says:

    Brie Larson and Alison Brie aren’t the same person? I’m so confused.

  6. NGBoston says:

    The stinging reality of her comments is an exact reflection of how today’s young generation has been raised. My children, who are in their late teens and early 20′s went to Elementary School on up with so many (more than 50%) of their classmates and friends coming from split families. Whether through actual divorce or just people who had children and never married and split- it was a common “status” as it were.

    Brie’s point being, that sometimes parents are not much more than egg carriers and human incubators and sperm donors. In the end, it really sucks for the kids involved when one parent completely drops out. Either by giving no financial, emotional or parenting support or all of the above. Obviously there are lingering emotional wounds and scars that never go away. So many unanswered questions, hurt, pain and disappointment.

    So right away she and others in her position gain my respect when someone is called out for being a complete absentee parent- and I don’t feel it’s a attention grab at all. We wonder why Lohan is so messed up? Her Mother is an alcholic and past drug abusing nightmare, her Father all of the above and a huge manipulator. They fought over Lindsay’s money when she was just a kid and throw her under the bus continually with all this back fighting. When Lohan finally crashes hard again and winds up dead—those two can stand back and thank themselves for what all their drama and greed did to contribute to this young womans status.

    As parents, we all make mistakes—but straight up abandonment in every sense of the word is spineless and I give any person affected the right to speak their mind and make their own choices in the end. To forgive and be at peace with yourself is the next step, equally as difficult as the journey.

  7. CidySmiley says:

    Neither have i, it’s rounding on year six this year. He was a toxic, emotionally abusive person (but that’s what alcoholism does.) I think it’s one of the best things I’ve ever done for myself was cut contact from him, my kids don’t even know who he is, and that’s the best I could do for them. There are times when I still feel bad, but I just fight that feeling, people who use others and stomp their emotions are selfish, and deserve to be alone.

  8. Tiffany says:

    She joked that she did not know who that was on the cover.

    I feel her on the father thing. I learned that just because you had a hand in my creation, it does not mean I have to like you, take your crap or feel I owe you the world. I am not a toy that you think will be there to play with when you are bored.

  9. ldub says:

    she looks like alicia silverstone on the cover……a photoshopped one though.

  10. Rhiley says:

    I want to see Room but I want to read it first and I haven’t gotten around to reading it yet. But Brie Larson does look like 10 other actresses: Chloe Sevigny, Jenna Fischer, Alicia Silverstone, Taryn Manning, Taylor Schilling, Whitney Port, Leelee Sobieski, Allison Williams. Ok, that is 8, technically 7 because Whitney Port isn’t an actress, just a blob.

    • NGBoston says:

      @Rhiley—Just a side note on the book—–I found it strange at first to get in to….I don’t know- they style of writing maybe. Don’t give up on it though.

      It is an amazing story and very different.

    • lucy2 says:

      I know a few people who had trouble getting into the book. I haven’t read it, but the film was excellent.

    • tracking says:

      This is one case I’d recommend seeing the movie first, without watching any trailers. Not knowing the outcome is part of what makes it so gripping. I’m not sure it would be quite as absorbing had I read the book first. It is a wonderful film, with great performances.

    • Josefina says:

      Here’s a very strange sentence: I liked the film better than the book. Maybe it was the language barrier, but sometimes the writing felt weird,I couldnt properly imagine the spaces. The film was excellent. Great performances and very innovative film-making.

    • NUTBALLS says:

      People I know who read the book didn’t care for it, but the film is well done. I’d encourage you to go and see the film.

  11. Insomniac says:

    I thought that *was* Kristen Stewart in that cover photo.

    I feel badly for Brie and for anyone who has toxic relationships with a parent; it has to take so much strength to say “No more.” I wonder if her dad is going to try to get back into her life now that she’s on the verge of winning an Oscar.

  12. Zaytabogota says:

    You don’t talk about non famous people, she chose fame, her family didn’t and regardless of the circumstances the privacy of private citizens is more important that some attention seekers need to tell all. It’s nobody’s business, she should be an actress and keep shut like all the professionals otherwise don’t whine when it backfires. There comes a time when they end up getting too much attention focused on their private life and can’t escape.

    I hated her gg speech and now this – emotional diahorrea, ugh.

    • Anon says:

      How to show reverse of the Word compassion in one comment.

      • perplexed says:

        I have to admit I’m a little surprised she opened up the discussion. I could see her discussing it years from now after she’s become more famous and people have pried into her private life in The National Enquirer.

        I don’t take issue with her stance not to speak with her father (and I don’t feel inclined to develop an opinion on the matter either since it’s not my business); I’m just wondering how the topic actually came up since she’s not as famous as Angelina Jolie where the main reason we know the specifics is because her dad keeps running to the media. Usually when celebrities like Jolie or Aniston answer questions on this matter, it’s usually the result of being forced to because their parents opened up the discussion first. Here, it appears to be the reverse.

        Mind you, I’m not unsympathetic to her plight. I just don’t get why or how the topic came up if none of us knew anything about the matter to begin with.

      • Zaytabogota says:

        I’ll save that for the people who deserve it.

      • Anon says:

        Perplexe

        Well I’m not sure but in her Golden Globes speech she talked about feeling deeply unloved growing up, so it might be an explanation.

      • OhDear says:

        @perplexed – I don’t know why she’s talking about it either, but maybe she figures that the press will find out about it somehow, so she figures that she’ll reveal it before it’s revealed for her? Or maybe she feels that her saying this will help other people in the same situation?

        I’m actually (pleasantly) surprised by the comments here – cutting ties with parents is such a big taboo that it’s easier to keep quiet about it instead of dealing with the “well you only have one mother/father” or “I had problems with my daddy but we worked them out.” or “you’ll regret this when they pass” type-[doodoo].

      • JenniferJustice says:

        My guess is she is still raw from it and it’s still on her mind. And we dont’ know what all was said by the interviewer prior to her response. They cut and piece these written interviews so some of the context is missing.

        That said, I think a person whose been hurt by another and I care not if it’s a parent, sibling, friend, boss, etc. if it was clearly a one-sided hurt, the victim has every right to say what they want about it. Why should someone be protected from being exposed for the wretch they are. I love exposure. If I had my way, punishment for crimes would be the old town square with a sign saying what they did. Public humuliation is the best method for serving a bad person a large dose of humility. These people (toxic parents, abusive parents, absentee parents) always try to hide and down-play the harm they cause. And since nobody but the victims now what they’re really like, why shouldnt’ they be held accountable to the public? Why should she protect him? She owes him nothing and he deserves nothing from her.

    • Nikki says:

      I came from a dysfunctional family, and we were always pressured to keep all our troubles “secret”. This was a huge deal, the secrecy. Your comment makes me wonder if you were raised to feel you had to protect adults. At any rate, I think she has every right to share HER reality. Owning the pain in one’s life – and in her case, taking decisive steps to cut that pain out- is a very healthy and admirable thing to me.

      • perplexed says:

        I think some are probably wondering why she’s sharing it with the public at large, not simply people around her or her friends. The public (or, well, the media machine) can become highly intrusive at points when you might want to cut them off. If she can cope with that heightened level of intrusion, that’s fine, but the media can be a handful when you want to move back into a more private zone.

      • Farhi says:

        There is a saying in Russia – ” don’t take trash out of the house” ( the same as “don’t wash dirty laundry in public” ). It is not to protect the abusers, it is because there are many people who will use such sensitive information to put you down to get an advantage. To paint a person as an emotional wreck, unstable etc.
        I don’t know if it is right or wrong. Every person has to chose for themselves.
        But it is a time tested wisdom passed on as a proverb.
        ( Obviously if it is abuse, seek help and go to the authorities. It is more in relation to how public you want to be with the information).

      • Who ARE these people? says:

        But who perpetuates that “don’t take trash out of the house” kind of mentality — usually abusive adults who want children to think no one will believe them. It may be “time tested” because child abuse has gone on for generations untold. Only openness will stop this cycle. Trash builds up inside and stinks. Sunlight is the best disinfectant.

        It is true that adults saying they were abused have been depicted as unstable, “damaged goods,” potentially abusive themselves (a total misreading of statistics), and so on. That gives any survivor pause. But it’s still more important to talk about the victimization of children and stop this cycle of protecting abusers. They use secrecy and shame as one of their tools.

      • perplexed says:

        Did she say she was abused though? She didn’t go beyond the specifics of not speaking to her father and that he didn’t really want to parent. Nonetheless, I have no issue with her not speaking to her father anymore, whatever her reasons might be.

        I had no idea what she was referring to when she was saying he didn’t really want to parent — that’s more the reason I asked why she was talking about it in public. If she had stated that she had been abused (and most likely wanted to help others by bringing the topic into the open), I would never have asked why she had brought the topic up.

      • Farhi says:

        My read of what she said was that he was maybe emotionally abusive, distant and cold. Not physically abusive. She seems to have some deep seated emotional pain she needs to work through and acting probably helps with it.

      • JenniferJustice says:

        Not hanging your dirty laundry out for the world to see is more about sharing specifics. This young lady was very vague and only said her father wasn’t there for her and she hasn’t seen him in years and that basically he made it easy for her to cut ties. I dont’ consider that dirty laundry. And I dont’ beleive in keeping skeletons in the closet – for whose benefit?

        To me, airing dirty laundry is more like Facebooking your breakup w/your boyfriend just to turn around and get back together – that kind of thing.

    • Holmes says:

      I totally agree, about her GG speech and all the rest. To me, she comes off as very fake and very thirsty–notice the amount of name-dropping she does.

      • Who ARE these people? says:

        Is it name dropping to be excited to have met all the famous actors that her own new-found fame suddenly allowed her to meet? Any of us might do the same.

    • Marigold says:

      You seem like a delightful person.

      Plenty of comments on this article indicate a shared experience and respect for her for saying it out loud.

      But I get it-it makes you uncomfortable-so she should shut up. Right.

    • lilacflowers says:

      @zaytabota,

      “she chose fame, her family didn’t”

      Her first television appearances date from when she was nine years old. Parents had to have some role in choosing that.

    • Jwoolman says:

      She was undoubtedly asked about her parents and how they influenced her, what relationship she has with them now, what do they think of her career etc. What else was she supposed to say? It’s not a deep dark secret. I never shied away from telling people the same thing if they asked. In one case, I did bring it up with a friend to ask him if he would be willing to be with me in case the guy showed up on my doorstep. Did not feel comfortable being alone with him or letting him in my house, but he was bigger than me and typically drunk… But really, such things are just part of our history. In her case, you know media are going to be scurrying around getting quotes from friends and family anyway. Makes sense to get it on the record that she doesn’t talk to him, in case he claims to have the inside scoop.

  13. CornyBlue says:

    It takes a out to cut out toxic relatives, let alone parents. I am hoping to move to a new city once i finish graduate school just so that I do not have to be in contact with most of my relatives.
    Brie is very very plain looking and that is excellent for her craft but she is so blah on mags and red carpets.

  14. jess1632 says:

    Looks like Anna paquin on the cover

  15. Minxx says:

    I thought it was Cressida Bonas (Harry’s ex) on the cover!
    As someone who had major issues with both parents all my life (divorce, parental alienation, immaturity on both sides), I feel for anyone who has to deal with it. It’s one of the toughest things to face in life.
    So I appreciate her honesty though I’m afraid it’s not a good time to admit that she has “daddy issues” – most of AA voters are spoiled, rich old guys who like obedient girls like a certain Supporting Actress front-runner (who, coincidentally, also has complicated family story but keeps up a perfect front for the Academy).
    I still hope that Brie gets her Oscar, she deserves it.

  16. perplexed says:

    She looks like Lauren Conrad on the cover.

  17. TreadStyle says:

    I think they styled her fantastic in the whole photo shoot for this article: make up, clothes, and hair! I wish she would get a new personal stylist for her events.

  18. Dee Kay says:

    I know this will sound strange but I think Brie Larson deserves a different Oscar than the one she’s about to get: I think she should get the Supporting Actress award for Trainwreck!! She was the perfect support to Amy Schumer in that film, and if you watch the great funeral scene, where Schumer is delivering their father’s eulogy, Larson’s expressions throughout are magic — some are funny but some tell you (the viewer) that she has very different views on their father than Schumer’s character does. Larson injects her character with comedy and pathos and I thought she was pure gold in that.

    In Room…she was great but frankly I think a dozen other actresses of a similar age would have been just as great. As others said, the real discovery there was the little boy, who delivered a performance that few other kids could have delivered. Joan Allen was also great as Brie Larson’s mother.

  19. colleen says:

    I think she looks very Kate Middleton-esque here.

  20. serena says:

    That’s right, she’s not noticeable at all.

  21. lila fowler says:

    Whoever did her makeup/contouring for that cover should be run out of town and never allowed to apply makeup professionally again. Atrocious!