Dustin Lance Black slams Sam Smith: ‘It may be time to stop texting my fiancé’


As I said on Oscar night and again yesterday, I was really pleased with Sam Smith’s Oscar win for “Writing’s On the Wall,” the theme song from Spectre. I would have been happy if The Weeknd had won too, or basically anyone but Lady Gaga. Something interesting happened when Sam got up to accept his Oscar: he made a mistake. And what could have just been a funny blooper morphed into something weird.

The reference Sam made in his speech was to an interview Ian McKellen did back in January, during the first flush of the #OscarsSoWhite debate. McKellen said yes, of course racism is at play, and he also said that women and LGBT actors find it difficult to get consistent, quality work. Then McKellen’s conversation turned to his past Oscar nominations, and how sad he was when he lost. He said: “No openly gay man has ever won the Oscar; I wonder if that is prejudice or chance… What about giving me one for playing a straight man? My speech has been in two jackets … ‘I’m proud to be the first openly gay man to win the Oscar.’ I’ve had to put it back in my pocket twice.” What he meant, of course, was the first out-and-proud gay man to win an Oscar AS AN ACTOR. What I didn’t realize at the time was that John Gielgud was gay (I honestly didn’t know) and he won an Oscar in 1981. To be fair, Ian McKellen didn’t cite Gielgud in his interview either.

So that was what Sam was referencing in his speech when he said: “I read an article a few months ago by Sir Ian McKellen and he said that no openly gay man had ever won an Oscar and if this is the case and even if it isn’t the case, I want to dedicate this to the LGBT community all around the world.” So, Sam Smith misread McKellen’s quotes – which would be easy to do, since McKellen doesn’t specify that he’s talking about the acting categories – and then made a mistake in the middle of his Oscar speech. When he was told about his mistake backstage, Sam’s reaction was quite charming (beware: NSFW language).

Of course Sam Smith is not the first gay person to ever win an Oscar. Elton John is an Oscar-winner. As is Stephen Sondheim, Melissa Etheridge, Alan Ball and a whole slew of other artists. Like… Dustin Lance Black, the gay man who won an Oscar for the Milk screenplay. So… Dustin Lance Black took major umbrage with what Sam said, and tweeted this:

Oooooooh, snap. Wait, are we still saying “snap”? Because SNAP. So, was Dustin Lance Black mad that Sam Smith made a mistake about gay folks winning Oscars, or was DLB mad because Sam Smith has texted Dustin’s fiancé Tom Daley? After that, DLB tried to take the high road:

Sure. While Sam does need to educate himself on Oscar-winning LGBT pioneers, I feel a bit bad for him. He was just trying to make a positive statement, and he even said “even if it isn’t the case…” because he knew he had to hedge his bets. Poor Sam! Sam ended up tweeting this by way of apology:



Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.

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94 Responses to “Dustin Lance Black slams Sam Smith: ‘It may be time to stop texting my fiancé’”

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  1. Alex says:

    Dustin skeeves me out. Just like Henry Cavill, it’s just weird to date a teenager when you’re in your thirties, no matter how “legal” it may be. And I feel like Dustin just wanted attention. Why air your dirty laundry? You didnt see Elton John mean tweeting Sam and if it’s true about your texts, maybe it’s time to have a conversation with your very young fiancé.

    • Naya says:

      Dustin is super insecure that his 21 year old boyfriend will run off with the 23 year old pop star, forcing his 41 year old has-been *ss to go back on the prowl for another teenager.

      • INeedANap says:

        Hahahahaaaa that’s absolutely correct!

      • Colette says:

        Tom and Sam are friends.That’s why Dustin found it odd that Sam wasn’t aware that he was an openly gay man who had won an Oscar.

      • qwerty says:

        I feel like this tweet would’ve had a different tone to it if he felt secure with them being friends.

      • Bridget says:

        “Stop texting my fiance” doesn’t exactly scream secure in their friendship. Maybe if DLB had said something like “LOL you’ve seen my Oscar – did you think Tom and I were just confirmed bachelor roommates?”

    • Talie says:

      Agreed. He was unnecessarily bitchy.

    • Esmom says:

      “Why air your dirty laundry?” was exactly my thought. He could have corrected him in numerous funny or kind or witty — and supportive — ways but instead he really came across like a real b@$%h.

    • INeedANap says:

      Yeeaaaah and that difference is much larger.

      Plus, Olympic athletes usually have very limited social development because they spend so much of their life training, so not only was DLB dating a man 20 years younger, the life experience gap was even wider.

      Congrats on the Oscar DLB, but you’re a creep.

  2. Cloud says:

    That song is so easily forgotten and did not deserve to win the Oscar. I heard Radiohead’s unreleased song Spectre from the film, it’s so beautiful and I can’t believe Sam Smith’s boring song was chosen.

    • AG-UK says:

      I totally agree nice voice songs are tired. I think I preferred him more on Disclosure’s music. Radiohead’s song was so haunting but I am biased as I love them.

    • Poppy says:

      I preferred the Radiohead song too. I honestly don’t know what the producers were thinking when they chose Smith’s atrocious song.

    • lower-case deb says:

      i blame Adele. before her no Bond song ever won, and now wins come one after the other. :D

      i agree that they should just go with Radiohead instead. ugh.

    • dAsh says:

      Yep. And Sam’s off key performance was the worst of the night followed by the weekend. He didn’t deserve that win.

    • Alex says:

      Yea I can’t believe it won either and after we saw LG performance I was just like ugh no.
      Either way I need Sam smith to go away for a bit he’s on my last nerve

  3. Neelyo says:

    No fan of Sam Smith (good voice, lame songs) but Black needs to grow up. What an immature response under the guise of educating someone.

  4. Jayna says:

    Can people ever just be gracious about it when someone mispeaks? It’s exhausting sometimes watching the pile on.

    • Ariadne says:

      YES! His intention was decent enough and I hate the thought that a great moment for him in his career might have been ruined by what was just a mistake

    • InvaderTak says:

      THIS x infinity!

    • Insomniac says:

      Agreed. I really cringed when he said that because I knew it was wrong and I knew the pileup was coming. I thought DLB really sounded like an ass.

    • Kitten says:

      Totally. This times a mill.

    • Josefina says:

      This so much. It was an understandable mistake. It made Sam look a little stupid and clueless but let’s not waste our energy on this minor missteps when there’s actual homophobia going on in the world.

    • Veronica says:

      Yeah, I’m a little confused by the ongoing dogpile on this guy, especially since he had noted that he could be wrong. He definitely f*cked up, but he got told and owned up to it.

  5. Zapp Brannigan says:

    Sam Smith looks like the son of Boy George and George Michael, it’s uncanny.

    • oliphant says:

      yes! in the above clips he reminded me so much of boy george- well, a really boring boy George….

    • Pix says:

      George Michael for sure. I think Chris Rock made a joke about it while introducing him. I thought he looked a bit like Justin Timberlake. Anyway, I think he should add back a few pounds. Too skinny.

    • Pinky says:

      “I’ll be sure to watch your films now.” That’s tacky and subtle shade. Like, I never heard of you but you sure AF have heard of me! Hilarious!!!


  6. Sixer says:

    Lord love Sam Smith but I don’t think anyone’s ever taken him for an intellectual. But regardless, so what if he misunderstood an article and made a public mistake? We’ve all managed similar even if we haven’t all managed similar at the Oscars.

    Dustin Lance Black comes off as real treasure trove of fun, doesn’t he?

    Class apologies tweets from Smith, so for me, Dustin LOSES BIG.

    • Hannah says:

      Even if he’s not an intellectual he could prepare his speech. It’s not THAT hard even if you’re not the brightest tool in the shed. He could even have an assistant research this for him.

      This is just lazy, but because Sam is so loveable people let it slide. The thing is he wants to make some LGBT historical point and he ends up rewriting history which is kind of disrespectful to a lot of people.
      If this was any other celebrity people wouldn’t have been like oh it’s just an honest mistake, poor him.

      I agree that dustins reaction was over the top

      • InvaderTak says:

        I’m willing to bet he didn’t think he’d win so he was less than prepared. He made a simple mistake. He wasn’t intentionally disrespecting a lot of people he mistook someone else’s quote and ran with it.

  7. lucy2 says:

    Ian’s comments were pretty clearly just talking about Best Actor. Sam may have forgotten, but maybe a quick fact check is in order when preparing an Oscars speech.
    Also, Dustin has already clarified this and said Sam and his fiance are friends, as in “hey you are friends with him, know he and I are gay, and know I have an Oscar.” His “stop texting” tweet certainly was poorly worded and left a lot of people questioning, but he’s attempted to clarify it.

  8. Nev says:

    Back off trick. Ugh. The worst.

  9. Lindy79 says:

    I get the feeling there is more to this than just him getting upset at Smith mispeaking, which he alludes to. It still seems very very much an overreaction.

    I do love the movie Milk

  10. GlimmerBunny says:

    I think Black’s response was funny, but I also think Smith made a honest mistake.

    I also think “Writing on the Wall” is THE WORST and didn’t deserve an Oscar in any way.

  11. ldub says:

    DLB is always so messy.
    Don’t be so passive aggressive.
    Send the stuff about your man in a DM/text/email & if he STILL doesn’t respect your relationship & keeps texting then put him publicly on blast.

    MESSY B00TS!

  12. Mia V. says:

    Lady Gaga’s song was much better and dealt in a very delicate way about abuse, a very hard subject to talk about, imagine singing.

  13. Melibea says:

    He is so overrated.

  14. GoodNamesAllTaken says:

    You can’t make a mistake these days, even if you admit going in that you aren’t sure about your comment, without being torn to shreds by somebody who wants to “educate” you. It’s not wrong to correct someone for a mistake, but there’s no civility anymore. Life is hard enough without getting so ugly over an honest mistake.

    • Erinn says:

      Here’s my thing though – people are WAY softer on Sam than a lot of other celebrities. Take a moment and think of how this thread would be different if Swift made the same kind of public mistake.

      He messed up – he had good intentions, but it doesn’t hurt for him to be reminded that he needs to get his facts right before making public statements. While it was nice that he was speaking about LGBT issues – it was kind of a “look at meeee I’m the FIRST and I’m soooo sweet that I’m going to dedicate it to everyoneee” moment, which kind of takes away from the message which wasn’t even correct to begin with.

      • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

        You have a point. He seems like a puppy to me. Stop kicking the puppy! But I might be a lot less understanding if someone I didn’t like said the same. Still, I don’t mind him being corrected, but it seemed an unnecessarily harsh correction that was really about the fiancé but was cloaked in let me educate you. It seems we have just gotten so extreme.

      • Pinky says:

        Yeah. Like, how hard is it, after reading an article that piques your interest, to do a little follow up research so you can speak intelligently on the matter? Does he only rely on one source/outlet from which to derive his facts? That’s intellectually lazy and scary. I kind of don’t give him a pass for this mistake because he essentially went out and uneducated a lot of people and did a whole community a disservice through his rather inexcusable ignorance. And yeah, saying you’re not sure means you’re ignorant of the facts. It’s not necessarily a criticism but in this case, he doesn’t really have a good excuse.


      • Kitten says:

        ITA Gnatty. I also agree with Erinn that if it was Swift, she would have been eviscerated by now.

  15. Scal says:

    Except smith also doubled down at a post party interview and said ‘I’m the second openly gay man’. He’s just not that bright-if he found out at the press conference (and I’m sure by then saw his phone or talked to his people)-why is he still going around bragging 2 hours later?

    I said it yesterday,, but That song from Spectre was AWFUL. The performance was awful. No way it deserved to win-the opera song or manta ray was better than any of the nominated songs that got a chance to perform.

    • msd says:

      Yes, I don’t have an issue with getting something wrong because you’re nervous and then owning up to it but Smith just kept going and going. When he was told he wasn’t the first he said ““I think I’m the second openly gay person to win it.” No, dude, you’re not second either, or even tenth. Give it up. Then when a reporter name-checked a previous double Oscar winner for song Howard Ashmann, Smith joked that “We should date”…. but Ashmann died of AIDS in 1991. At some point, if you have any sense, you just STOP TALKING.

  16. littlemissnaughty says:

    That was an honest mistake as far as I can tell and yes, he could’ve googled that sh*t before quoting Ian McKellen but then again, I can’t even fault him for not questioning McKellen. I wouldn’t. It was just a mistake and his response to being called out was kinda cute. What is not cute is Dustin L.B.’s reaction. Good god man, you’re in your f*cking 40s, get it together. It looks so bad that he’s this openly p*ssed that Sam Smith, half his age, doesn’t know him or his work. Oh the HISTORY of your community! Just shut up and hug your Oscar if you must.

    • Wilma says:

      Right?! I would trust Ian McKellen blindly on all matters lbgt. Now I’m not sure if his comment on the amount of out actors in The Hobbit actually means something…

    • Pinky says:

      Sir Ian wasn’t wrong. Sam misunderstood or didn’t bother to think past the words “no openly gay” and then just ran and ran and ran with it, even after being corrected.

      It’s like, don’t speak if you don’t know what you’re talking about. Instead, listen and learn!!! You’re not doing anyone, least of all yourself, any favors and it is disrespectful to an entire community that struggled and paved the way for your ignorant ass. People fought and died and you waltz up there lacking any curiosity or knowledge and you doom us all to repeating a very turbulent history. This goes for everyone who doesn’t bother to learn their facts whether they be feminists or non-feminists, black people, white people, Asians, Indigenous, Hispanics, gay, straight, trans, everyone!


  17. Nancy says:

    I thought he looked fantastic, especially since losing all the weight. His gay comment was probably what he believed at the time, or he wouldn’t have made it knowing it would be challenged universally. Beating GaGa was the best moment of the night, aside from Leo winning even if everyone knew he had it in the bag.

  18. Hannah says:

    Sam sounds uneducated on LGBT generally .
    If you are going to make a point like that you have to research the history. Even Halle berry managed to get it right in her speech when she referenced black Oscar history. Also the thing about checking out dustins movies? If you’re a gay man who is campaigning for LGBT rights at least you would have heard about Milk?? Dustin on the other hand comes across a bit bitchy.

    • Adrien says:

      Maybe he didn’t expect to win. Although, being British does not excuse one to be ignorant about Oscar’s history if you are a nominee. I find it arrogant that he assumed to be the first openly gay person on the basis of Sir Ian’s interview alone. “Hmmm, if I win tonight, I would be first”.

    • Pinky says:



    • I Choose Me says:

      Halle Berry forgot to name check Whoopi Goldberg for her Oscar win Ghost. A fact that pissed off Whoopi to no end. I’m no Berry fan but in the heat and excitement of the moment, sometimes you forget stuff or misspeak.

      My wish for 2016 is that we all be a little kinder and forgiving of verbal missteps, unless the person says something really egregious. Of course, opinions will always vary on what’s egregious or not.

      • Kitten says:

        Yes and YES.

        “in the heat and excitement of the moment, sometimes you forget stuff or misspeak.”

        Seriously, cut the guy some slack. I’m sure he’s properly mortified by now. The harping is so OTT..

      • Farhi says:

        “My wish for 2016 is that we all be a little kinder and forgiving of verbal missteps”

        I sign the petition. We need to look at intent and actions first, no the words. Words can be taken out of context.

      • Leah says:

        @I choose me
        I really don’t think its comparable. Berry forgot 1 name. Sam omitted an entire history. I agree that one could forget one of the names in the heat and excitement. But if you omit the entire history thats gone down before you id say it looks more as if you haven’t really looked into it.

    • EM says:

      Dustin used Smith’s idiotic speech as an opening to express other private aggravations he has. That’s not to say he was wrong to point out the LGBT aspects he pointed out, but he could have taken the high road and not mention anything about text messaging.

  19. Cynthia says:

    I can’t stand Sam Smith sorry. Why do
    mainstream music keep awarding these mediocre artists who make subpar, boring soul music?? why???I can name many soul singers, British and non, whose music is way better than Sam’s, but mainstream won’t give them a chance.
    Also remember when he realized that *gasps* racism still exists in London in 2015 and he said that he wanted to shine a light on racism?? LMAO

  20. Mandy says:

    I think that song sucks. I think it won not because it is a superior song but because old white men didn’t want to vote for a song about rape. They went “Ooooh, James Bond” and ticked that box instead. Maybe they were confusing it with Adele’s excellent Bond song. Kaiser, I am usually so on board with you but I think you have it wrong this time.

  21. LAK says:

    Sam is an idjit if he thinks no openly gay man or woman has ever won an oscar in the history of the oscars, especially in the categories outside acting. Everyone from George Cukor and Cecil Beaton.

    However, Dustin was ungracious in the way he slapped him down and implied something more sinister behind Sam’s mistake…..and oddly hinting at trouble in paradise.

  22. Illyra says:

    Oh God, I could never watch that speech (or any clip like it)… the second-hand embarrassment would kill me.

  23. Farhi says:

    Oooh, boy drama. )) We don’t have enough movies about that. I am ready for a rom-com about two men.

    • LAK says:

      There are plenty of Rom-dramas and Rom-Coms in the mainstream about gay men or women.


      Films set in the gay community are thriving. There are festivals for gay films in all genres in many cities. they aren’t underground and hiding. if i’m not mistaken, Netflicks and Amazon also have a library.

      • Farhi says:

        Which ones are rom-coms? I watched Broken Back Mountain. Don’t want to watch Carol, I didn’t like the snippets I’ve seen, plus it is about women. Somehow gay women relationships seem to be more acceptable in the mainstream.

      • The one with Daniel Day Lewis–My Beautiful Laundrette.

      • Farhi says:

        Thank you. I’ll give it a try.

      • LAK says:

        I’d forgotten that one VC. there is also SAVING FACE.

        Farhi: if you want specifically male gay films, i would recommend THE WEDDING BANQUET and ANOTHER GAY MOVIE. from my list, BROKE BACK MOUNTAIN, THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT and CAROL are rom-dramas. the others are female centric rom-coms.

        ETA: BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOUR a female centric rom-drama.
        Recently watched HOLDING THE MAN a male centric rom-drama. loved it.

      • Veronica says:

        As a bi woman, I’m going to correct you on one point Farhi – lesbians are more accepted as long as they can serve as sexual objects for straight men. Outside of that, they deal with the same crap as any other member of the LGBT community.

  24. Jess says:

    Ok I am just gonna call it like I see it
    Sam smith is mediocre. There are so many better singers in the uk in that genre. He’s benefitted hugely from the Adele success because there was an appetite for cuddly down to earth white english soul singers.
    People hate gaga I guess but her performance just reiterated that she’s the superior singer.
    Dustin Lance Black may be a Cnut but he’s right, smith should educate himself.

  25. Adrien says:

    If that Jack White-Alicia Keys’ Bond song were an entry this year, the Oscars would have voted for that. Sam Smith winning made Adele’s Oscar award meaningless. They also insulted nominee, Anohni twice.

  26. lucky says:

    Sam is 23. I wish that he hadn’t glibly aggrandized the possibility that he was the first openly gay winner. It seemed both incredibly self congratulatory and very dismissive and disrespectful to the winners before him who faced much tougher discrimination and risked a great deal more than he has.

    The fact that he couldn’t be bothered to check his facts and really didn’t seem to care when he was initially made aware of hist misstatements , is in fact really disrespectful of gay rights pioneers, and effectively reduces the advances of the movement (built on the tremendous sacrifices of known and unknown heroes) to nothing more than a platform for him to promote himself as a righteous crusader. Kind of a big no-no.

    He’s basically presenting himself as a gay rights activist who doesn’t encourage his fans/followers to pay attention and pay respect to those who opened the doors for so many of us today. You could even argue that if he had truly had anything to overcome he would have understood the importance of getting his facts straight.

    Speaking as a gay white man, white gay men can be a bit self-absorbed and sometimes it’s up to us to police ourselves. I think thats what DLB was doing, in a very gay way. And I think it worked.

    Let’s not forget the almost countless number of gay women and men who wee discriminated against but stood firm. Let’s not also forget the large number of gay men who died during the AIDS epidemic. One of the winners he dismissed died of AIDS…

    One of the best ways to honour the community is to remember and be humbled by what those earlier activists did for us.

    With all that being said, Sam is 23.

    Bless his heart, but, his comments to the world were disrespectful to the hard work of other gay people.

    • FingerBinger says:

      He probably gets his news from twitter. Nobody fact checks tweets they just run with it.

    • Pinky says:

      ^This is the post to read. (lucky’s) Right here.


    • Magnoliarose says:

      Well said. It’s not that hard to do a quick check especially since the Oscars should have been an area of interest seeing that he was nominated and he’d read the article. Easy mistake in a way but sort of ridiculous too. He can hopefully use this and become more aware if nothing else.

  27. Lucy says:

    Okay, well…considering the nerve-racking circumstances, I would have probably made a mistake during my speech too. I’m sure he’s more than down with being called out and educating himself. Black, on the other hand, sounds like an a-hole.

  28. Fallon says:

    I’m curious when Sam Smith morphed into Daniel Radcliffe?

  29. lile says:

    DLB, it may be time for your fiance to speak up and ask Sam, politely, not to text anymore because it makes the person he is committed to uncomfortable. That would be the correct way to go about it. Not acting all bishy for the world to see. That’s just sad.

  30. Cora says:

    I realise Sir Ian was referring to gay men, but there is a gay woman who has won TWO Oscars in acting categories — Jodie Foster.

    • Colette says:

      Jodie Foster was not openly gay when she won her Oscars.As a matter fact many people still dont know she is gay.

      • Bridget says:

        What counts as open? Is Jodie Foster not out because she hasn’t put out a press release? Because she would care to differ.

  31. Banana says:

    Sam Smith looks like JJ Feild, Neve Campbell’s partner.

  32. ickythump says:

    Meeoww!- is DLB secretly auditioning for a part in Vicious? …seriously, sam smith loves to think of himself as a gay icon just as caitlyn jenner thinks shes an icon for th transgender community. The freedom he enjoys today was built on the suffering of others who had to endure th most appalling treatment and he doesn’t even appreciate it, thats whats galling about it. And he is mediocre, imo totally overrated.

  33. Classy and Sassy says:

    So DLB is not only incredibly creepy, he’s also a bit of a douche. Good to know.

  34. EM says:

    Sam Smith is quite stupid to say what he said without researching anything beforehand.
    To say that he was the first gay man to win an Oscar is a right laugh. Not only does it show that he fails to read beforehand (what Sir Ian McKellan said), it just shows he hasn’t got much up top either and tries to back track.
    Overrated singer. The James Bond Spectre theme is atrocious and melodramatic.

  35. timlin says:

    This guy looks demon-possessed and unsettling. He is posing the death out of that camera, and fails miserably. He is just quite unattractive in the face. Maybe he needs to come to grips with that. He is no George Michael or Jon Bon Jovi.

    And it seems his sobstory about being gay, and fat, and bullying an whatever will never cease to exist. We get it – we feel sorry for you and you are a precious precious princess.

    Now act like a grown ass man that life is being very kind toward and stop the incessant whining. He is overrated imo.