Drew Barrymore: ‘When you don’t have kids, you’re not thinking about your mortality’

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Drew Barrymore is canceled for me after her garbage comments about #metoo, but I wanted to talk about the fact that she suffered a concussion on the set of Santa Clarita Diet while doing her own stunts. It reminded me of Uma Thurman’s story somewhat, in that someone probably dropped the ball in order for her to have been put at risk. Of course freak accidents can always happen. Here’s what she told People.

After a stunt gone wrong on set of Santa Clarita Diet season 1 landed her in the hospital with a concussion, the actress, 43, says she’ll leave those to the professionals.

“I will never do my own stunts again,” Barrymore tells PEOPLE in this week’s issue, on stands Friday. “That was the end of a wonderful era. I can look back at a bunch of movies that I totally was a baller and always threw myself in there. I whip it in Charlie’s Angels! But I will never do a stunt again because I could’ve died and it was really scary.”

While filming the first season of the Netflix horror comedy in 2016 [Barrymore] jumped on an actor’s back as part of a scene and ended up falling six feet onto the concrete. Production shut down and Barrymore spent two days in the hospital, having MRIs and CAT scans done. She returned to set a week later but reconsidered doing stunts for two important reasons.

“I have two children,” the Golden Globe winner says, referring to the daughters she shares with ex-husband Will Kopelman. “When you don’t have kids, you’re not thinking about your mortality. Now that I have children, I will be sitting on the sidelines.”

[From People]

Leave it to Drew to generalize her own situation to everyone else. “When you don’t have kids, you’re not thinking about your mortality.” Bulls-t, but that’s Drew.

Last year I got hit in the head with a ceiling fan and got a concussion. It affected me in specific, bizarre ways. I regularly do dance fitness like Zumba and the Just Dance video games, but I could no longer dance to songs I hadn’t memorized before the accident. I also couldn’t walk and talk at the same time to new people or I would get dizzy and confused. I had to stop participating in a hiking group, but I could easily walk and talk with my best friend. After a few months those issues went away, and they were comparatively minor.

A friend recently got a severe concussion and his whole personality changed. I hope he’s ok and that he returns to his normal. Drew may have had less of a filter between her mind and her mouth after that concussion. It wouldn’t excuse what she said about abuse victims needing to be more positive, she sounded so much like Tony Robbins, but it might explain it.

So many actors are being hurt and injured on set. I just saw Maze Runner: The Death Cure (interesting concept, poorly executed) and remembered that Dylan O’Brien got such horrific head injuries while filming that they had to shut down production. For all we’re learning about the film industry, it seems like such a high risk environment in which more controls need to be put in place.

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photos credit: WENN, Backgrid and Pacific Coast News

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96 Responses to “Drew Barrymore: ‘When you don’t have kids, you’re not thinking about your mortality’”

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  1. Neelyo says:

    What an idiotic thing to say but considering the source, no shock there.

  2. Beth says:

    Speak for yourself, Drew. I don’t have kids,but that doesn’t mean I don’t think about my mortality

  3. Who ARE these people? says:

    Thinking about their own mortality is the reason a lot of people without kids have kids.

  4. Saartjie says:

    I think she said it wrong, but you do change how you think about mortality when you have kids, or at least I did. Before I had kids, the thought of dying was obviously still a bummer, but practically I was mainly just worried about whether my parents would be affected by the costs of burying me. After kids, the thought of dying is just terrifying, because I am so important to the emotional well being of those two little boys, and my husband would be pushed to the edge as well, emotionally and financially. Its just a very different scenario to think about.

    Also, concussions are horrible, its a brain injury at the end of the day isn’t it. I had depression for months after mine.

    • Mimi says:

      Agreed–I think this is what she was trying to say but as usual she made a rather sweeping generalization that makes it seem as if parenthood is some heightened state that brings a special kind of enlightenment to its members.

      The way I felt about death before I had kids was just the way you described it. It wasn’t something I was overly concerned about, other than in a very vague abstract manner since I’ve been fortunate to have no health issues. Now, it is utterly terrifying to think about not being alive to raise my child and see her grow into adulthood.

    • JeanGray says:

      Ditto.

      I used to be such a free-spirit and a real daredevil before I had my daughter. Once she came to be, my entire attitude changed. I was all of a sudden very aware of my own mortality and wanting to stay healthy and alive for her. To the point where I became afraid of doing the crazy stunts I used to before. But i was also only 22 when i had her so that realization would have probably come along once my frontal lobes completely developed lol. Also, you see the world and things you used to do in a totally different way once you think about your own kid doing them. Man it’s a lot of stress and worry thinking about this tiny human lol.

    • Veronica says:

      I agree with you. After having my daughters, I think about my life and my mortality much differently. I thought about it but it was never really a concern. Now, I have two little lives depending on me for their very existence and it gives me so much fear and anxiety over what would happen to them if something were to happen to me.

    • Millenial says:

      Also, ditto. I get what she’s saying. Before I had kids, I wasn’t terrified of dying the way I am now. Now that I do have them, I definitely think about it more than I did. And I just worry more in general about my health and my husband’s health. I don’t know. Obviously other people think of their mortality, too.

      • Anon33 says:

        This has literally nothing to do with kids though. I’ve been an anxious worrier my whole life and I have no kids. These are just differences in personality.

    • Sherry says:

      I agree. I was coming here to say the exact same thing. Before I had kids, I took all kinds of chances. I would go out on the farthest rock of a cliff, walk over precarious rope bridges, skydive, walk out on bridges that were closed and off limits during flooding, etc.

      Once I had kids, I see danger around every corner. I’m not willing to put my life in jeopardy, because I don’t want them to suffer the loss of a parent if I can help it.

    • JR says:

      100%!!! Of course you think about it before children, but it’s different after.

    • magnoliarose says:

      I think of my mortality differently, and I consider it in ways I never had to before. My biggest fear is dying before they are on their feet and I have been a presence in their lives or that I die before they remember me. It is a different set of mortality feelings. I think about my pets too, but I have so many animal lovers in my life that I know they would be loved. That was more before I married though.
      Drew doesn’t like to own her feelings and needs them to be normalized by thinking ALL people think as she does. I noticed that pattern with her.

    • Raina says:

      I can understand her point, actually. Having kid(s) can make you more cautious. Not just with physical activities, but just everyday things. I think people who don’t feel a particular kind of responsibility when someone is dependent of them aren’t being being honest, unless they dgaf altogether.
      I’m not sure what taking a dance class or having a ceiling fan a accidentally hit you has to do with it. That isn’t the same thing as doing insane stunts. I think the vitriol about other things Drew said is bleeding into this article.
      I also think, because free speech, that writers of articles tend to set the tone for commenters. The fact is a lot of people get influenced easily.
      You can tell by the way comments go from agreeing to slightly agreeing to really agreeing

    • GreenTurtle says:

      Totally agree.

  5. pia says:

    I am 31 and live alone and think about these things…I want to make sure my aging parents are cared for. Others in my place think the same..a family is more than you having children.

    • Ellecommelejour says:

      Exactly !
      And I’m sure we’re not the only ones.
      I can not stand women who once they become mother start saying this like. Pisses me off so bad.

    • MellyMel says:

      Thank you!

    • Wren says:

      Yes! Childfree and I think about it too. There’s my parents to consider, and all my animals. I’m actually in the will of a single, childfree friend of mine where if she dies before her animals do, some of them come to me. It’s not just children who are affected by someone’s death.

      I think it’s more like you don’t think about your own mortality until you mature. When you’re a teenager, you’re invincible and death is scary, but it’s more of a concept than a concrete threat. Once you truly mature and fully feel the responsibilities of life, mortality becomes a much greater, more realistic thing to worry about. For many people, that maturity comes with having children, either alongside or because of them. Maybe it would have happened anyway, but they don’t know the difference so they say stupid generalizations, not realizing that just because many people have a similar experience, not everyone does.

    • Tulip Garden says:

      My husband and I don’t have children after 24 years of marriage. Of course, I think of my own mortality. My concerns, and his, are different than someone who has children. I think people with grown up children think differently. I think single people think differently. Circumstances dictate concerns, it’s to be expected.

      I like Drew. She did make a sweeping statement but I don’t think she meant to be insulting. It makes sense to me that people with young children worry about their mortality in relation to that. That seems normal and responsible to me.

      • magnoliarose says:

        That is what it is. It is just a different set of concerns. I was ill over a year ago, and it was serious. I had cognitive and thought process problems. When I started commenting here again part of it was to exercise my brain even if it was initially messy. I thought about my children and didn’t want to scare them, so I tried to hide it. Without them, I don’t believe that anxiety would have been as intense.

  6. aims says:

    I’m a mother to three, but even if I wasn’t a parent I’m still mindful of my mortality and how I take care of myself.

    I’m getting a little tired of a woman’s life begins when she has children. Contrary to popular belief,you can have a full and complete life and not be a parent.

  7. OriginalLala says:

    still suffering from foot in mouth disease I see?

  8. Carol Hill says:

    Take a seat, Drew. I have no children by choice. I am 63. I think of mortality frequently. Especially when helping my 90 year old mother. Or, like when I go to the nursing home to help my friend who has no one, but is dying of COPD. I think of my death and of dying alone often. I help with Hospice. What are you doing, Drew?

  9. boredblond says:

    How silly..it isn’t the kids that make you think about mortality, it’s growing older and realizing you’re not invincible

    • JeanGray says:

      Ultimately this is what it really is! For some of us ,this idea is propelled faster once you have a kid (depending on how old you are when you have one- I was 22) , but it’s mostly about maturity, growing older and seeing how delicate life truly is. As kids/teens we think we’re indestructible.

    • Ashley says:

      Bingo, boredblond. I’m childfree and have always thought about my mortality. Even when I was young. I have been involved in two life-or-death situations, so questions about mortality are never too far from my mind.

      I understand how parents might view mortality differently, if only because they worry about what would happen to their children if they died. Especially if they have young children. That wouldn’t be a concern for someone who doesn’t have children.

      But the privilege of aging is what makes people think more about death.

  10. mazzie says:

    No. You think about it because:

    1. You have been/are ill
    2. Friend or parent has been/is ill
    3. You watch the news
    4. You’re told this from people like Barrymore
    5. You have common sense and know you’re going to die eventually

  11. minx says:

    I hate those kinds of sweeping generalizations.

  12. HK9 says:

    It’s official. She’s an idiot. I’m finishing my will right now and finalizing my funeral arrangements. Although I’m single, with no kids, my untimely death would still leave a hole in my family. There would be no one to care the way I would for my Mom who has Alzheimers and since I actually have relationships with my family, and several godchildren, people would notice if I wasn’t here. Single people have value too Drew. The self-importance/righteousness that comes with her brand of parenthood is ridiculous.

    • Kitten says:

      Yup! I think you covered everything nicely.

      So sorry about your mom. My grandmother passed away from Alzheimers and it is a truly horrific disease.

      • HK9 says:

        Thanks Kitten. Sorry about your grandmother, I know how hard that must have been. While I’m still glad Mom’s around, it’s hard to watch the progression of the disease.

      • Claire says:

        My Grandma had it too. Heartbreaking and not a peaceful way for her to go. She wasn’t able to consciously spend her last days with her loved ones. =(

    • SusieQ says:

      Same here. I’m only 32, and I have no children, but I’ve already done my will and healthcare/financial powers of attorney after watching my dad wither away from vascular dementia last year.

  13. Tania says:

    I don’t have kids so I guess that’s why I drive 100 mph on the wrong side of the street. Because death is only for those with kids I guess?

  14. lightpurple says:

    Celebitchy, glad you got better. What a confusing and scary time that must have been for you.

    As for Drew, I really need her to stop talking. I had cancer at a young age. Because of it, I can’t have kids yet I think about my mortality every single day. Also had an emergency surgery last year that went wrong. I’m okay now but I was pretty much focused on my mortality when I came to in that recovery room, strapped down on the bed with tubes everywhere and not a kid in sight.

    • Laura says:

      I’m sorry about your health scares but I’m glad you’re still here 💛

      I also have health issues that constantly make me question/ponder my mortality but I do not have children. I’m really tired of hearing some mothers talk like motherhood is the ultimate experience in life and looking down on those who are not mothers 😐

  15. Miss Gloss says:

    I think what she said was very poorly worded, but from my experience, I can sau that I didn’t think of my own mortality until I had children. Now, I’m even freaked out leaving my kids to go to Costa Rica for an upcoming trip. What if something happens to me and their dad? I know…that is a little crazy

    • Tulip Garden says:

      I would seriously have legal documents drawn up naming who is to be made guardians of your children in case of the death of both parents. Don’t want to be morbid but it is the responsible thing to do. Also, you may find your more relaxed with that covered.

  16. PoliteTeaSipper says:

    When I was diagnosed with my disease I confronted my own mortality. I do not have children.

    Drew can have all the seats. I’m so tired of being lectured by women with kids about how I’m somehow “less than” because I don’t have one.

  17. Cynical Ann says:

    I’m going to guess that it seems more real to her because she now has other people to think about beside herself.

    • OriginalLala says:

      but you dont need to have kids in order to have people to think of besides yourself – if that is her point she must have lead a very selfish life before having kids then.

      • Cynical Ann says:

        Of course-but that’s my point. If you know her backstory, her upbringing and parenting were a mess-so I’m sure she’s not close to her mom. She’s been in and out of marriages. I’m sure this is the first time she’s ever had to think long term about anyone else beside herself.

  18. Slacker says:

    She’s an entitled brat. Who cares what she says, I have always found her to be fake and truthfully not terribly talented. In this instance I do think part of the problem is she’s uncomfortable with anger herself. For me watching the clips that was obvious. She’s carried it way to far though in saying how women should feel after an assault and just to back up Celebitchy that comment about being scrappy was stupid and thoughtless. Scrappy women get assaulted, old and young women get assaulted, doesn’t matter your looks, attitude, etc , if you are a woman you are at risk for assault and rape

  19. Umyeah says:

    So i actually feel similiar to Drew, this may sound weird but i dont have any big issues with dying and i dont fear my mortality however i also suffer from depression (for 20 years) so that could be a factor in the way i think.

  20. Patricia says:

    Second concussion post today lol and I had one last week. I wonder how it has affected my behavior. I was very very sad for a few days at first, which isn’t like me. Anxious, yes. Sad… almost never for me. So that was weird.
    I am still having mild affects and mostly I’m just easily fatigued. A close friend of mine had a very severe traumatic brain injury and in a way he died that day because he is not the same at all. His whole personality changed and having a relationship with him is very challenging now. It’s a heartache to see that person right in front of you and yet they aren’t really there.
    Brain injuries are no joke. Does that explain Drew’s verbal diarrhea lately? I don’t know. She’s always been a favorite of mine and it’s sad to see her running her mouth. I understand her point because I have children and they were all I thought about until the CAT scan confirmed I was ok and going to recover. But she just doesn’t know how to make her point without being offensive lately.

  21. Ashley says:

    Oh brother. She says “you” but it’s clear she’s generalizing about her own experience. We expect these people to precisely and carefully express themselves at the standard of an attorney and have such a hard time giving the benefit of the doubt about what someone probably/is pretty clearly is saying. I don’t have kids – I am so not offended by this.

    • Lyka says:

      Oh dear lord, thank you. Drew is very likely a dummy, but we all use the proverbial “you” to make comments about our own opinions from time to time.

      Also childless and not offended.

    • DesertReal says:

      My thoughts exactly!

      Sincerely,
      Childless and Cautious

    • Tulip Garden says:

      Yes, I have no children and no issue with how Drew expressed herself. The constant looking for offense where none is likely intended is tiring.

    • Ada says:

      Phew – finally! I was looking for this comment. “You” is figurative here, a more open-ended way of saying “I”. Also noting difference doesn’t mean that she, or anyone, believes that people can’t think of mortality without kids, just that for her motherhood changed her approach. People are calling her an idiot for that?

      All this unnecessary outrage can take a seat. And I say this as a single never-parent who is scared of everything.

  22. lucy2 says:

    I think she said it very poorly, as I generally can’t stand when people start anything by generalizing about people who do or don’t have children.
    But my guess is she feels the responsibility of those two small kids depending on her, and the idea of being badly hurt or killed and how that would affect them terrifies her. That’s understandable. But please, no generalizing.

  23. BettyBoop says:

    I didn’t think about my mortality until both my parents died within 7 months of each other. I was young enough to realize the horror and come to the realization of my own mortality.
    Both died before they were 60. It is quite true, when you are young you believe nothing can or will happen to you. Your just not focused on it, why would you be? For me, it was like an epiphany, something I had never thought about prior to my parents being gone and I was alone. Nothing to do with kids. I used to like Drew, but she really needs to get off her own rides in Drewland, they are making her dizzy and sorely confused. How about actors stop talking and stop ruining our illusion they are rational, decent, compassionate people. Drops the mic…..

    • Christin says:

      Losing parents is what made me more cognizant of my own mortality. I’d lost several co-workers and friends at young ages (cancer, heart attack), and was very aware how none of us are guaranteed tomorrow. But the loss of two people so close to me in my life was when it went to a higher level. One day, it was just over (a few months apart, like you experienced).

      I worry about those I can still help (spouse, my pets), should I become seriously ill or pass away.

      • BettyBoop says:

        I have normal worries as well. I think most of us do. The best we can do is prepare i.e. life insurance, wills..etc. From there, it’s let go and let God. Even if you know someone is sick, or if it happens quickly, we are never really “ready” for it. I’m sorry for your losses. It is indeed a terrible situation to deal with.

      • Christin says:

        I am sorry for your losses as well. There is a bigger plan, and I keep that in mind. Maybe some of us are just wired differently, though.

        I have three remaining aunts (all aged 85-up), and they don’t seem to give a thought to the inevitable. They were the family’s most obvious narcissists, too. Those seem to often outlive everyone else.

  24. Cranberry says:

    Sounds more like she didn’t start thinking about her mortality until she started having these accidents. Guest what Drew you’re getting old and your body can’t perform or bounce back the way it used to. This is exactly when most people with or without children start to consider mortality. So again your sudden consciousness seems to come first from your self centered perspective and not as much from your selflessness concern for your kids. That’s ok though. It’s very normal and happens to many people in much the same way.

  25. Newyorking says:

    I relate to it. Before kids I didn’t fear death as much. Now I fear that if something happens to me what will happen to my kids. Whenever I go far alone I am terrified because I truly don’t want anything to happen to me. Others may feel that way too regardless of kids but for me having kids takes on a whole level of responsibility.

  26. Redgrl says:

    Wow, how patronizing – and out of touch, and insulting and… well, I could go on…I started thinking about mortality when my father died unexpectedly in my early 20’s. I continued to think about it during a cancer scare in my mid-20’s and then when I collapsed at work in my 40’s. I continue to worry about it as my husband is a decade older than me. We don’t have kids and our fears are no less valid than those with children. So sit down, Drew, you patronizing brat & consider yourself cancelled.

  27. HonkyTonk says:

    She’s really getting on my tits.

  28. Mabs A'Mabbin says:

    She really needs to insert, “In my case,” or “For me,” into her preposterous posits. She’s like one of Cartman’s cheesy poofs.

  29. Happy21 says:

    That’s right Drew! I have no children so the thought of dying doesn’t cross my mind ever which is why I quit smoking, or I exercise or I eat well or I don’t put myself out there to DIE. Good god woman, listen to yourself.

    She’s such a flake.

    • AMY says:

      I am so freaking tired of getting crapped on for not having children. I am 45 years old and that was the choice I made. I never wanted children for myself, that doesn’t mean I don’t love my nieces and my nephew.
      Why do childless women get labeled all the time. I am so disgusted by Drew’s comment. She has got her white, privileged head stuck up her ass!! That is my opinion, and the last time I checked, my fat ass was allowed to have one :)

      • Lightpurple says:

        I didn’t have the choice. My mortality came crashing down around me with the cancer diagnosis. The life-saving chemo ended any choice. So tired of the insensitivity of women like Drew.

  30. BJ says:

    I find it hard to believe that she never thought about dying BEFORE she had kids.When my doctor told me there was an issue without my mammogram I thought about my mother dying of breast cancer and my mortality.Fortunately the ultrasound came out fine.I would think most people with or without kids think about dying.

  31. Elizabeth says:

    I feel the same way about my dogs. People think it’s funny that I have life insurance at my age with no husband or kids but I have a senior dog rescue and the money would go to whoever takes them. Also, I think it’s maybe more growing up than having kids that does that to you. You fully realize the risks of doing dangerous things.

  32. j says:

    It’s like she’s oblivious to the fact that other people have inner lives too.

  33. trh says:

    Parents are insufferable.

  34. Nancypants says:

    I’m chiming in late but I understand what she is saying.

    When you have children and older parents and so on who depend on you, you think twice about some things. You think about, “How would my death impact these beloved people?”

    My mom has been a widow for 30 years.
    My only sibling died young. I had to sign paperwork in the military that stated that I understood that wasn’t going to keep me from deploying my ass off and I did but I also kept my affairs in order to include a current Will, life insurance, Living Will, etc.

    You DO think about your mortality more when you have children, so, there.
    I’ve had them and I haven’t had them.

    I remember when I had to jump from a perfectly good airplane once.
    I didn’t have kids and my mom wasn’t a widow and my sister was still alive.
    I just said, “Whatever”, and jumped.
    I wouldn’t do that now.

    • BJ says:

      If she had said I think about my mortality MORE now that I have kids I doubt anyone would have had an issue with her statement.

    • Anika says:

      Nancypants: Sorry, but if the airplane was “perfectly good,” why the hell did you have to jump from it? You’re a little unclear…Also, while I think for MANY women, it’s true that the thought of mortality becomes more ubiquitous after having kids, there are PLENTY of childfree women who ruminate about mortality to an equal extent. *Any* woman who has had to face life threatening illness, in themselves or a loved one, for instance, is going to think more about mortality than most–whether or not they have young children. Simply growing older, with increased proclivity to health problems, and increased loss of loved ones, makes most women immensely more aware of mortality–again, whether they have children or not. Your apparent generalization—that people regard their own mortality lightly unless they have children—is inane and simplistic, and presumptuous. No, YOU do not “know” that women without children are less aware of their mortality than women who have kids. You are speaking from personal experience/opinion, but that does not make it factual, it does not make your perspective universally true. So, there. (Also, if you just thought “whatever” before you jumped from that “perfectly good airplane,” I find it all the odder that you presume to speak, with veracity, about ALL women, or about people in general.)

  35. ellie says:

    I don have kids and my niece is an only child and Im frankly consumed with the thought of my mortality, as I dont want her to be alone in the world.

  36. Jailnurse says:

    Drew Barrymore is dumber than sin period, yet somehow arrogant enough to speak for all womankind with her sweeping generalizations. This woman has literally not once made a single intelligent comment in an interview in all these years. Thanks for making me feel like a genius Drew!