When I read other site’s coverage of the NYT interview with the Arrested Development cast, in which multiple male castmembers dismissed Jessica Walter as she cried about being verbally assaulted by Jeffrey Tambor, I will admit that I wanted to minimize it. It couldn’t have been as bad as everyone is saying, especially in a room full of people in front of the paper of record, right? Then I saw Kaiser’s coverage and the original interview and got sick to my stomach. It was worse than I could imagine. It’s hard to take and it hurts to remember similar incidents in my career. The audio makes it clear that it was even more egregious than it reads in print. Walter is crying and explaining how Tambor’s behavior was the worst thing she’s experienced in her long career and the men in the room LAUGH at her. Their half-assed non-apologies and explanations afterwards just compound what royal pieces of sh-t they are.
Well one guy who was is friends with Walter isn’t a mansplaining sh-thead. Actor Thomas Sadoski, whom I know as Amanda Seyfried’s husband, knows Walter and I believe they worked together. (I checked their stage credits and IMDBs and couldn’t figure out the project but a lot of sites are saying they were costars. Update: it’s a film coming out this year called The Mimic, thanks Lucas!) Sadoski posted an Instagram in which he responded to Jason Bateman claiming, as Walter cried, that it’s some sort of stage process to berate and demean coworkers. It’s not stage process and it wouldn’t be acceptable in even the greasiest diner that Sadoski worked in, where the employees were on drugs. Here’s what he wrote on the Instagram post above and I’ve censored the swear words for our advertisers.
This is Jessica Walter. She is a national goddamned treasure. It was an honor and a privilege to work with her. I don’t give a f-k who you think you are or how good you think you are or how awesome you think your buddy/daddy is: screaming at someone isn’t “part of the business”. It’s bullsh-t. It’s unhinged bullsh-t behavior and it has NEVER been acceptable. It wasn’t cool in the 70’s or 80’s or whenthef-kever you “came up”. It was bullsh-t then, it is bullsh-t now. And excusing that kind of behavior is pathetic. Just pathetic. I worked in sh-itty greasy-spoon kitchens growing up: it wasn’t acceptable behavior THERE and most of us were on HEAVY DRUGS. It certainly isn’t acceptable for some man-baby millionaire to do on a cozy ass tv show set. And it is even less acceptable for his male cast-mates to excuse it away IN FRONT OF THE PERSON THAT IT HAPPENED TO….(wait for it)….WHILE SHE IS TRYING TO EXPLAIN HOW TRAUMATIZING THE EXPERIENCE WAS. What in the halfpenny f-k is happening?!
This exactly and while I’m not saying Sadoski deserves a cookie for being a decent human being (I’m going to yell now, THIS SHOULD BE THE DEFAULT RESPONSE) he does deserve credit for explaining it so clearly and for stepping up at a time when so many men in his industry are making excuses, gaslighting women and trying to talk over and define their experiences for them. We’re finally being heard and believed on some level and the men who are the most threatened by that are protesting the loudest. It’s nice to hear someone calling it out for the utter bullsh-t it is.
photos credit: WENN, Getty and Instagram/Thomas Sadoski
I have no idea who this man is but I love him. Thank you sir!
He was on HBO’s The Newsroom.
Don Keefer was my TV boyfriend. Loved him, and TS’s portrayal of him. Legit the most realistic characterization of a news producer I’ve ever seen (having grown up with a dad in TV news, I can vouch for the accuracy).
He was fantastic as Don Keefer! He could be a smug prick at times, but Sadoski played him with such nuance you never really hated him. He and [mild spoiler] Sloane Sabbath (Olivia Munn) were so great together.
I shipped Don and Sloane SO. HARD.
He’s also on Life In Pieces, which is one of the funniest shows on TV!
He’s adorable in Life In Pieces. So glad to know he understands this issue.
I used to ALWAYS get him mixed up with Mark Ruffalo…no longer…he’s earned his elevation with this stance, which should be SOP when you’re dealing with this type of crap…and the fact that Walter’s started crying…makes me believe that there’s LEVELS to this mess!!!!
Mark Ruffalo and joe manganiello blend. Hot. And I also didn’t know who he was, but adore him in this statement.
He is 100% correct and also hot. I approve of both.
I agree on both, but he’s also a cheater and I don’t like him, but good for him and this response!
Cheater? Did he leave his SO for Amanda?
Lama Bean: Possibly! http://www.celebitchy.com/475191/was_amanda_seyfrieds_boyfriend_married_when_they_got_together/
No cookies but damn is it nice to see a guy expressing the same level of anger and outrage as most of us felt while listening to Jessica tell her story in front of a room full of gaslighting aholes.
I only know him from Newsroom and always got sketchy vibes from him (I’m not sure but maybe because of how he and Amanda hooked up? I forget why..) but I am SO here for him on this.
I loooove him on Life in Pieces. That whole cast is amazing. I am officially a hard core Thomas fan.
RE: Amanda – I feel like there were some possible overlapping timelines between relationships. Either her previous or his previous?
“damn is it nice to see a guy expressing the same level of anger and outrage as most of us felt”
Yes, exactly. His statement was so satisfying because it was such a passionate defense.
Amen. It’s called decency. More people NEED to display it, IMO. Good for him.
I was already happy that his show “Life in Pieces” was renewed since it was on the bubble for awhile, but now I’m EVEN HAPPIER it was renewed.
I love him…and I love him on LIFE IN PIECES. He’s obviously a normal human being with the normal amount of compassion. Where are all the rest of the normal men?
May other men follow his example!
I get yelled at at work all the time and I fight back. People are like why do you take it so personally? He yells at everyone. I’m like uh that’s the point. He SHOULDN’T be yelling at anyone like that. There’s a way to talk and correct people. Unless the person you are speaking to is deliberately not listening to you I don’t see the point of yelling and demeaning people (and even then I think yelling serves no purpose). I’m always told I escalate situations, and that very well may be, but I don’t find it acceptable to be spoken to disrespectfully.
Yup! same here. My boss is a cantankerous old man who yells at and berates everyone. I have literally told him to eff off to his face. Anyone who tells you that you “escalate situations” is basically telling you that you do not deserve basic respect from your co-workers or boss. They are essentially gaslighting.
I always say that I’ve learned so much from my job but the biggest lesson was learning to advocate for yourself and if that means fighting back, then so be it. Never let yourself get steamrolled. Usually the men who bully are the ones who end up respecting you for not kowtowing to their bullsh*t.
People tend to side-eye me when I say I love my (female) bosses. I love working for women. They’re under 40 so it might be a generational thing as well but they are lovely and professional and so good at what they do. I see some colleagues work for these grouchy old dudes and I count my blessing.
To be fair, my former boss was an old guy and pretty great. But there is something about the dynamic of old guy and young female employee that seems to bring out the worst in some.
There’s a guy that’s lower seniority than me, but he will start shouting and finger pointing and I refuse to tolerate it. I typically tell him he is being inappropriate and I will come back when his temper has simmered down. After talking to HR, I was given permission to send him home the next time he has an outburst. I refuse to be the audience of someone having a tantrum.
I had a friend who , when a male colleague would have an outburst yelling and berating people say “Oh, you seem very emotional right now. I’ll come back later when you’re more in control and can have a reasonable fact based conversation.” It used to piss him off, but I loved to hear a woman throw the “you’re being emotional” card at a man, after a lifetime of men patting women on the head, telling them they are being too emotional.
Also, as an aside, I want to give a good swift kick in the shins to every man making fun of Walter crying during that “halfpenny f-k”ing interview. I guarantee that Walter was not crying because she’s weak, or needs to grow up or is a snowflake. She was crying because she was furious and frustrated and has had it up to the f-ing sky with this sh-t.
Angry tears are a thing, often born not just of anger but anger combined with frustration.
“Have you ever had your feelings hurt but, simultaneously, also felt exasperated, just boiling with frustration—maybe even to the extent you could feel your lips quiver? … it’s likely the situation was one you perceived as grossly unfair. And, as I’ve written in many of my Psychology Today posts on anger, this highly inflamed emotion is the only one that can be understood as, at bottom, “moralistic.” For it’s typically aroused when you believe you’re being treated in a manner that’s biased, unfair, or unethical.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201504/angry-tears
I angry cry and I hate it :p
I wish I had better control over it, because people can use it against you because they think you are weak. When really I’m shaking and crying from righteous FURY! 😀
You ladies have inspired me to fight back. What do you really owe someone who has disrespected you?
You don’t owe them anything. I started learning in my 20s to gradually hold my ground when someone is needlessly sarcastic / disrespectful. I wish I could go back and call more people out who thought they could steamroll the “quiet” one.
I have personally found that you’ll experience far less disrespect, once people sense you don’t play that game.
LMAO He gets two cookies just for the way he said it though. Correct and entertaining. Man baby! I can’t. Still laughing.
Yeah I loved that, and the “daddy” part.
Amanda girl, you got yourself a keeper here.
He dumped his wife to get with Amanda, so maybe not.
I love how he explains that even in the ’70’s o ’80’s it wasn’t acceptable to yell at people, or at diner. It is never acceptable to act like a baby when you are a grown up, no matter what profession you are in!
I love his response, and give him ALL the cookies because I’m DONE giving even a crumb to overpaid, overpraised jerks like Tambour and Co. Walter has been working since before I was born, she’s seen a LOT during her career I’m sure. The way she was treated was just disgusting. She’s almost 80 and STILL having to deal with being demeaned at work because of her sex.
Yes. This, gentlemen, is how you react whenever you see or hear other men being sexist pigs.
And THAT is how you be an ally. And a decent human being.
“What in the halfpenny f-k is happening?!” I’m so using this later.
Was so shocked by the AD crap that I’ve been at a loss of word to actually comment. But now I have found the perfect words…
“WHAT IN THE HALFPENNY F-K IS HAPPENING?!”
ANd he didn’t even need his wife to tell him to say something.
Hey Cross, this is what an ally looks like.
Amanda, you lucky girl…
They worked together in this movie.
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt5704368/
Good find!
Isn’t he, or wasn’t he, a Scientologist? I thought I’d read it here before.
Nope. You’re thinking of someone else.
Now I’m wondering who I think he is.
Just wow. I actually feel overwhelmed with happiness and respect for this man after reading his well-expressed opinion. Bravo. I think I love him. Lucky Amanda!!
Amanda got herself a good ‘un.
I had no idea he was married to Seyfried!
I can relate to being berated in front of collegues by a male manager. It was awful. He did it so much that it became who he is. To some it happened more than others. When I finally spoke up about it it was so bad I was terribly shaken I almost talked to someone about it. But he apologized but I like a dummy believed him. He continued. To those that did speak up I believe he retaliated against with bogus bad reviews. Worst manager I ever had. I finally did speak up to his manager but I believe his actions had consequences in that some peers don’t respect those who were treated like that. Like simply sending an e-mail I get no response. That was his legacy, one of hostility in the work place.