Jim Parsons: ‘It’s a weird thing, being a gay couple’ for years before we could marry

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Big Bang Theory star Jim Parsons stopped by The Ellen DeGeneres Show to promote his new movie, A Kid Like Jake. Jim recently celebrated his first wedding anniversary with graphic designer Todd Spiewak. The couple, who were wed in a romantic ceremony at NYC’s Rainbow Room last May, had been together since 2002. When Ellen congratulated Jim on the anniversary, he said he recognized the one-year anniversary as “officially for the law” and noted that:

“It’s such a weird thing, being a gay couple at my age, because [when we got together], you couldn’t get married. So now, this is our 16th year together, but it’s our first [anniversary]. We’re back to paper, is it? Is that what the gift is? That’s bullshit. I want gold!”

Jim didn’t have a lifelong dream of getting married, but revealed in a recent TIME profile how he changed his mind:

“I had an evolution on my feelings on gay marriage, in that I didn’t logically see the importance of it. One of the things that changed my feelings on that was when I thought about, ‘Oh my God, part of the reason you feel this way is because it was never a possibility and so you never dreamed about it. It suddenly felt exciting to be a part of that and helping to change the world in your own personal, heartfelt way just by doing what you want to do.”

[From TIME]

During the chat with Ellen, Jim also talked in great detail about his ailing, 14-year-old dog, Otis. He recounted that a vet told him it would be Otis’ time to cross the rainbow bridge when “he stops doing things he enjoys, that’s how you’ll know.” Upon hearing this, Jim jokingly asked, “What do you mean? The dog doesn’t crochet! What is he doing? Well, he doesn’t play poker anymore.” Sadly, Otis did pass away and Jim posted a sweet tribute to the pooch on Instagram. Fortunately, he still has his eight-year-old dog Rufus. What cute pups.

Otis October 31, 2003 – May 8, 2018 Otis came into our lives as an 8-week-old puppy just after Todd and I had been together for 1 year. We were living in Brooklyn, NY, which is where Otis learned to take walks on a leash and, in doing so, got socialized to other dogs – which he liked – and to other people – which he LOVED. Otis loved people, loved seeing people and seemed to brim with an expectation that they would all be equally thrilled to see him. Otis thought all visitors to our home should be there to stay and he would bark in a near-panic as soon as the first hints of “goodbye” were uttered (this was true whether the visitor was a close friend or even an electrician, handyman, etc). One of Otis’s favorite places to sit was my lap and as soon as my butt hit a chair or a couch, Otis would hop on board; Otis wasn’t just comfortable on my lap, he also needed me to know that he owned me – and he did. And still does. Todd and I were truly blessed by the universe to have Otis at our sides for over 14 1/2 years of the over 15 1/2 years we have been together. As such, he was and will remain a major part of who we are as a family. Todd wrote some beautiful words about Odi that I am going to repost here, just after I post this. We will always miss you terribly, Otis, but are so grateful you came into our lives.

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Rufus 🐶

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Besides the movie and his BBT duties, Jim is currently on Broadway in the revival of the 1968 play The Boys in the Band. Jim co-stars with Zachary Quinto, Matt Bomer and Andrew Rannells as a group of gay men living in pre-Stonewall Manhattan. Last month, during a curtain call, Jim stumbled and broke his foot. He’s back on stage now with a orthopedic boot on his foot and told TIME, “It’s just another interesting hurdle, and hopefully the audience feels this way too—that it’s part of the joy of live theater that you can’t get anywhere else.”

A Kid Like Jake looks like an interesting movie. Despite my disdain for BBT, I really like Jim as a person and as an actor. And if anyone wants to take me to New York to see The Boys in the Band, I can have bags packed in 15 minutes.

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Premiere of 'A Kid Like Jake' in New York

The Boys In The Band 50th Anniversary Celebration After Party

Photos: Getty Images, WENN.com

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9 Responses to “Jim Parsons: ‘It’s a weird thing, being a gay couple’ for years before we could marry”

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  1. Becks1 says:

    I really like Jim Parsons (despite my hatred of BBT…that show is so ridiculous) and I’m excited to see his new movie. I never go to the theater so I’ll probably see it in 6 months though lol.

  2. Ceb says:

    As a queer person growing up in the ’90’s, there was always this dual discussion in my circles about the right to marry and how wonderful that would be vs. the right to marry, how wonderful that would be AND choosing to reject the institution anyway. Something becomes diluted in gay culture when the conversation becomes about “dreaming of marriage”, as though this historically oppressive and imbalanced institution that has reinforced patriarchy for eons is somehow the goal for everyone. I’m not saying that this is what Jim said – he’s entitled to want and be excited about anything he chooses, and if that for him is marriage, then I support that 100%. But something is lost when people of all orientations begin to fetishize the idea of marriage rather than accepting and exploring a plurality of relationship dynamics.

    Will the queer community start to redefine what marriage means? Absolutely – and that’s a wonderful thing. We should all have rights and access to our partners, and the right to marry in the quest for equality is an important one. I just wish the conversation on the national stage could broaden to include ways to create bonds, community and partnerships that is a bit more expansive.

    • Turtle says:

      Agreed. The first wave of marriage equality was the longtime couples, the 80-year-old lesbians who have been together for 50 years, and couples like Jim and Todd, which gave everyone the feels. Now we’re seeing guys getting married and divorced in under a year. So who knows where it goes from here? We still don’t have full civil equality, so that’s the next battle. It feels like people think the battle has been fought and won, and it hasn’t.

  3. Darla says:

    I love him. BBT is my escapism comedy, and though some of what people say about it is true, Parsons is amazing. He has given me many hours of laughter, and sometimes, when I needed it most. I also think he’s an awesome person.

  4. Piya says:

    On Jim’s first appearance on Ellen, she was so dismissive to him. he was excited to be on, but she was zoned out of that interview. This was before he won the awards and BBT became the ratings gold it is now, so it is interesting to see how much warmer she is to him.

    • Darla says:

      Really? I never saw it, that is interesting. He’s a powerhouse now. In addition to the projects mentioned in the OP, he also created and produces (along with his husband I believe) Young Sheldon which is a big hit. I’m happy for him.

    • Lynnie says:

      Ellen does that to a lot of people actually. Weird how most people don’t pick up on it

    • detritus says:

      That’s because Ellen is a bitch 🙂 I say this with semi love, because she’s faced a lot of shit and she’s succeeded despite some crazy odds.

      Don’t believe the veneer, most super successful business people are just really good at lying. Ellen fooled me for awhile, but Lynnie’s got it.
      Ryan Seacrest, also creepy asshole. The stuff he said to Katy Perry clinched it for me.

  5. BørkBørkBørk says:

    I really like Jim Parsons, he has terrific comedic timing, and he is rocking that orthopedic boot. However… Matt. Bomer. (sorry to sidetrack)